Oh man, sorry about that. I completely didn't add it into the channel! I put the link in the show notes, and here it is as well: www.adhdbigbrother.com/Do-I-Have-ADHD
Do you think sometimes we self-sabotage and throw ourselves back to square one because square 5 is a little intimidating? I was eating really healthy and walking my dog every day and a week ago, got to the healthiest weight I've been at in a long time and then I spiraled and ate every carb and sugary food I came across ALL week! Like, I don't even recognize myself, and I don't know what happened!!
That is very familiar to me! I tend to need to be black or white about certain things. If I have a tasty burger with fried and a soda for lunch and I get all kinds of good vibes from the experience, then that becomes the thing i want EVERY. DAY. To my detriment.
If daydreaming / anticipating a reward can elicit a dopamine release from the brain, do you think it´s valid to say that daydreaming is potentially addictive? And do you have any resources on this? Would appreciate it very much. Thank you.
That's such an interesting idea regarding daydreaming as potentially addictive! I'm with you on that one, I wonder! The scientific resources are not my area of expertise, so I wouldn't be comfortable discussing that outside of a casual conversation. When I think of addiction, in terms of the addictions that I've had/overcome in life, the element that was there was that I was always thinking about the addiction and when I was going to have that substance again and how to get that substance. If daydreaming had that same element of debilitating drive, then I'd agree that it's addictive. For instance, you are always thinking about when you could get time to daydream, or when you would be able to sneak off and daydream.
im warning you : using daydreaming to feed your dopamine need can be as strong as drugs, if not even stronger. Im daydreaming since childhood and the result is i live in my mind daily infinite desires that are satisfied instantly and without effort. As you said, dopamine is more about craving than reward and with daydreaming there is no limits to desires you can have since they are all satisfied instantly and without effort. The issue is that you can be content with just daydreaming alone, no need anymore to invest emotionnaly in reality because the reality in comparaison is just tasteless : you have to make effort, all desires can't be satisfied, you feel pain and so on... Im trying currently to change that because even though i had infinite hapiness, I felt like i hit the end game (when you have infinite hapiness, there is nothing else to do, nothing to change). So I thought it was time for a new chapter, to live a new adventure in my life. So I tried to get back in reality. Very hard to change. The result was I developed some addictions (food, sex) because it was the only way to live something as intense as what i was living with daydreaming. Now i'm following a method to get rid of those addictions and still have intense life experience but one thing is sure, I can't do daydreaming again without compromising my dopamine level and sensitivy. But i'm scared to do so. Because by stopping daydreaming I fear to lose my imagination and capacity to put myself in someone else shoes, which gave me lot of insights to understand different and contradictory point of view, helped me to live and understand situations i will probably never live in real life... It's like i'm exchanging one life for an other (because i can't have both) and if i want to gain one I lose the other ...
I did all the steps, I have a notebook. I put the task in my caldender... But then when it comes to that moment I just really don't find the motivation to start doing it and I do something else instead. I end up moving it to another timeslot in my calder but that could go on forever :| The problem is that I don't have any discipline when it comes to doing things I don't 'want' to do. I cannot force myself to do things.
That's such a common issue. I totally swallowed the pill on the importance of community for these kinds of things. When we tell other people what we are doing, it adds that extra bit of accountability. Additionally, I would recommend the following things that work for me: 1) Make sure you are specific about what you are doing...cleaning is vague...cleaning the kitchen is more specific...doing the dishes is even more specific. The more specific the better. 2) Set a timer for the shortest amount of time that you could put toward it....doing something until it's done doesn't work for ADHD. Doing something for 10 minutes feels ridiculous but when you reward yourself with quitting, that makes it easy for me. In the ADHD Big Brother community, I have even done a thing where I had a goal of doing a thing for 15 minutes, but my commitment was only 2 minutes. This is all in service of how to "get started" and more often than not, I will have the juice to keep going. 3) Pick the easiest point of entry into the task - cleaning is the easiest example, so....doing the dishes would be "open the dishwasher". When you start the timer, ONLY do that one thing...(and 90% of the time you may find that you keep going) Hope that helps.
@@adhdbigbrother Thanks so much for the elaborated response. I realised I wasn't specific enough and I also didn't use timers yet. I should give that a try!
Awesome! One of the members of the ADHD Big Brother online community uses an app called Things 3, and I just started using that to capture ideas when I'm on the go. Now I just need to add the routine of transferring it to my bullet journal!
I really like the mediation and hypnosis videos on RU-vid from Michael Sealey and from Jason Stephenson. After my mom passed away, I had so much anxiety and could not sleep and used these every night. Now, I use them occasionally when my internal thoughts won't shut down. I use a half size notebook to write down all the things. I made the cover all scrappy with cool paper and labels (ie. A label from a whiskey we like) so I enjoy using the notebook more. It's almost all the way full which makes me inordinately happy.
Hey Katrina!! Thanks for the recommendations. I’ll absolutely check them out! Anything that helps with relentless internal thoughts and helps with sleep is a keeper in my books. Thanks again!
I make plans, i journal... but then i never read them.. and i never remember how i was going to get my life together.. if i somehow follow my plan, i get bored after 2.5 days.. then i plan again... and forget the next day... then i get frustrated and depressed, then i get impulses to entertain myself with novelty - weed and girls.. then i get into guilt... and i make a plan AGAIN.. and the cycle continues..
I really feel this comment! Sounds like a giant struggle-tastic turd mountain. I have this similar thing with my voice recorder. I'll get a brilliant idea while I'm out and about and record the thought in my voice recorder app on my phone. Current number of the 100s of voice notes that I have gone back and listened to later = ZEEEERRRROOOOO. It's me and my bullet journal now, and a steady habit of visiting it multiple times a day.
Stress management.... besides letting it build up until I lose it? ;D. Walking outside really helps me, the fresh air and scenery really helps me maintain a peaceful mindset. Otherwise, I drink tea and do handicrafts, but sometimes I hyper-focus and my hobbies can become a procrastination situation keeping me from necessary tasks, so I have to be careful with that or that one can turn into stress.
Good stuff! I appreciate the idea of trading negative self-talk for a curiosity about why something isn't getting done. Sometimes, I find that it's one very small step that is holding me back, but if I don't stop and just look at what's going on, I just keep procrastinating.
OK, I'm all caught up. I listened all of the podcasts from the beginning after I heard about you from Adam Savage. It's amazing how many things mentioned in the podcasts relate to my life going back to my first year in public school, fifty-five years ago. Great work, Russ.
