MAH MAH.. I am looking at the Wall of the Prison.. my back on the Bars and I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing of YOU.. and also I drew the Picture I was thinking about My Father and me.. also YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH and your Father the King with the Ink Pen in my hand.. I remember it was the Most Happiest time in my Life.. the first day I saw YOU.. and How.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH has taken my Breathe away.. I wanted to serve YOU and Protect YOU all through my Life.. even in this Prison Time I am sitting.. and I hear the Prison Door Opens and it closes behind Me.. DID not expect anyone to visit Me and I would hear the Foot steps behind me and stops.. and I would turn around slowly to Look.. I just could Not believe who is visiting Me.. it is YOU.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. and I would move Back.. and face looking at the Floor.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. it is pretty Late and I know that YOU are suppose to be sleeping.. why would you come to visit Me here in the Pitch dark of the Prison.. YOU know that I am life in Prison and ready to face death soon.. for Treason.. and I would hear the Sword touch the Bar.. and I would lift UP my Head.. and YOU.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. the sword points at the Picture of the drawing.. It is YOU.. My QUEEN sitting on the Horse.. Your Father the King holding the strings of the Horse on bare feet.. me and my Father.. Face DOWN before YOU and Your Father who was the Late King before His Passing.. and I would.. both hands grab hold unto the Drawing picture that I drew when I first Met YOU.. and I would Lift UP with both hands UP to show YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I am Not sure if you ever remembered this time.. and It was the First time I ever saw YOU.. My father was appointed by your Father.. the KING.. PEH HA at that time to be Head over the servants and He was celebrating with Me.. telling me that He just became the Head over the servants and who was at that Time serving YOU as the Head servant.. and He wanted to take me down this Road and wanted to show me who you were.. and that is when I saw YOU.. sitting on top of the Horse.. your Father PEH HA.. the King who was walking bare feet.. holding on the strings of the Horse.. He wanted to be left alone with YOU where there was the Ocean waters.. it was the day when I first saw YOU but also the day I fell in Love with YOU.. I never told my Father this at that time because I did Not even know it for myself.. I saw you and I wanted to serve.. I wanted to Protect YOU for some reason.. of course I was just too young to know the Life that would be leading me here.. but that day I saw YOU.. I do remember.. My Father and I.. I saw my Father falling before the King.. YOUR FATHER PEH HA.. as the Head Servant.. head looking to the ground.. and I knew.. this must be the King.. Must be the ruler of the Nation.. Must be the One to rule over and Must protect and to defend and I knew.. I got of that horse and ran where My Father was at and I fallen.. looking at the Ground.. My Heart wanted to be a Part of the Nation that was rebuilding for the future to come.. I remember that day.. for some reason I wanted to be a Military Soldier.. wanted to be a warrior.. a Guard.. some one to be very Close to YOU but to have a part to protect the NATION you.. my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH was going to build.. I am not sure what it was when I saw YOU.. but I saw your Father.. I saw the KING.. PEH HA.. I saw him walking alone wanting to spend TIME WITH YOU.. which it moved me.. Behind the HORSE you were sitting On.. I saw large companies of People who belonged to the ROYAL PALACE and I just knew.. there must be something very SPECIAL about YOU for the FATHER to care and Love so much that HE had other sons too is what I heard.. but.. walking the Horse alone and pulling it by himself with the Large COMPANIES to leave YOU and your Father.. I knew that YOU were going to be HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I was Not sure HOW you were going to get there but.. I just knew that YOU were going to do something BIG for this Nation where People are going to see and I just wanted to be a PART to help to Build a stronger Nation helping and Supporting you all the way.. I remember that DAY.. your FATHER the KING.. PEH HA TOLD both Me and my Father to stand UP.. my father stood UP before the King and I did Not.. two Knees down.. my Head looking at the ground.. arms stretch forward to salute that I am going to be a military soldier who will serve the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH was my Heart showing YOU.. My QUEEN and your Father the KING.. I remember both.. the Fathers looked at me.. my father smiled and the KING.. your Father has spoken out loud and said.. He can see me protecting YOU and being by your side rebuilding this NATION to make it more stronger for YOU TO RULE and to CONQUEROR.. your Father.. PEH HA said.. a YOUNG BOY like myself has Courage.. has BOLD HEART and smiled LOOKING at me as I am LOOKING at the Ground.. I remember that DAY.. I made a Promise to YOU from my Heart.. that ONE DAY we will see.. that ONE DAY I will see the QUEEN.. that I will be close to the QUEEN.. and I would say to YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I made a promise to be here because I knew YOU are going to make this NATION stronger.. I just want to be a part to HELP YOU to build it.. I needs to see it so that I can finally let go of.. BUT I can't let it go unless I see it what I truly Believe to come this Very Far for YOU.. and I am looking at the Ground of the Prison and tears fills me eyes and I see the Tear drops running down and it hits the Prison Floor.. I have made this Promise to YOU and I have come so Close.. LOOK at it when YOU GO back.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I am so CLOSE to see YOU rebuilding this NATION.. I have made this Promise to be BY your Side.. to defend and to Protect YOU.. to HELP YOU.. to SUPPORT you for your People.. that my Dreams has come true where I get to see YOU as the RULER.. YOU are the TRUE CONQUROER.. YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA saw it that YOU were going to take his Place.. and WHEN HE saw Me.. and HE LOOKED at me when I was very young.. before the KING.. PEH HA.. I raise UP me voice to YOUR FATHER that day.. to PEH HA the Late King that I have made the Promise to this NATION to serve YOU and to Protect YOU and to LOVE YOU forever.. but when I am chained UP in Prison.. and now I am being punished to death for Treason when I have done nothing Wrong but to fight ON your BEHALF MAH MAH.. Before I die.. before the sentencing to put me to Death HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I have made a Promise to YOU.. and this is the Picture which I drew.. when I saw you the First time.. and How my Father has lead me to YOU.. I made a Promise to YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I even made a Promise to Your Father PEH HA.. and even to this NATION.. YOUR FATHER PEH HA.. the KING has received my Words when I spoke.. after HE said LOOKING DOWN ON ME that day.. He sees that I will be there for YOU.. that I will help YOU as My QUEEN.. so Please reconsider and HELP ME to finish what I have started.. help me to KEEP MY promises that I made to YOU as the QUEEN.. as HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. even to your Father PEH HA.. my Father who is in the grave.. I know that My time is very short and that Is why I need Your Help.. that is why I need you to HELP me so that I can keep my promises that I made to YOU.. that I know I may not be able to be with YOU.. But I can always Love YOU from the Far.. and I can be close to watch the rebuilding of the NATION to grow stronger.. YOU have the WORDS to do.. YOU have the power in your Words to help me to keep my Word I have made to YOU since when I was very YOUNG.. when I came into this Prison WALL.. I would sit quietly and as I close both of my eyes.. it took me back when I was with my Father.. How my father wanted to tell me something very Important.. and it was when I saw you for the first time.. I remember sitting on the TOP of the Horse my Father who had the strings pulling it forward.. tells me.. that is the KING and His Daughter.. and He goes over to Lower himself.. I just knew at that Moment.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH is going to rule.. that YOU are going to take over your Father's Place and be the One to rebuild the NATION in the greater Heights and to make it more stronger than what it was at that TIME.. I wanted to be a Part.. I wanted to see it Happen.. I wanted to be there to HELP YOU.. to FIGHT FOR YOU and to protect.. to defend if it means something to YOU because that day is when I saw myself just falling and my Heart be saying to ME that I love YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that I love YOU and has never let that GO and still.. as I am here in the Prison.. and YOU can see the chains on both of the wrists.. I can't do anything if I am here with the chains in my wrist and that I am locked UP.. I know that the War is coming SOON.. and Like I said to YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. please reconsider.. I have already made a Promise to YOU and for the NATION you are trying to Build.. Please let me be a part to see it happening with YOU.. Please HELP ME so that I can too help YOU to conqueror and for YOU to RULE all the way.. and I see your hands.. as the Paper that I drew of YOU and Your Father.. PEH HA.. and Me and my Father by the Ocean Waters.. I see you.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. the QUEEN looking at the paper which I drew with the Prison Ink and I am LOOKING at the Prison Floor.. and I would say LOOKING at the FLOOR.. DO you remember that time.. I am Not sure if YOU remember back then because Now.. I remember

MAH MAH.. Promise.. but One thing that I do know is that I am here.. I have seen you become the QUEEN.. my eyes has seen that YOUR FATHER'S Words were true and He was right about what HE has decided at that TIME.. also.. My Heart was right when I saw you the first time.. and I fell in Love with YOU.. and when I did.. I knew I had to give it ALL IN and just go ALL IN for YOU.. YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA was right about me too.. that I was to help YOU.. to support and to defend and to protect YOU.. HE was right when he saw me that I was going to be Close to YOU.. that I be your Soldier and which I am NOW.. but Only YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH can change what is to COME.. you.. MY QUEEN has the Power with your Words to HELP ME to keep my Promises to Finish the Promises that I made to YOU LONG AGO.. I am still willing to go fight and to Protect.. to defend ONLY if you are WILLING MY QUEEN.. that is why I am begging here on two knees to HELP me to keep my WORD before I die.. I want to die with peace.. I don't want to die like this if I did NOT FINISH.. or ACCOMPLISH the Promises I made to YOU and for YOUR NATION.. so you are the ONLY ONE who can change the times which I am at the TIME OF DEATH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. PLEASE help me to keep my Word I made to both Fathers.. My Father and Your FATHER PEH HA.. as I watch YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I would lift UP my Head to LOOK at YOU.. and I see you.. the QUEEN.. YOU would sit on the Floor.. and point at the HORSE where I was sitting.. and point at ME as I am looking through the Prison Bars.. and I would tell YOU YES.. that I was the ONE who sat on that Horse.. I am sure if YOU saw ME sitting on the TOP of the Horse as my Father was the ONE who was pulling the strings of the Horse walking forward and I see YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I see you with Tears.. and I am not sure is it for JOY or sadness and I see your Head telling me yes.. that YOU do remember that DAY.. and It was ME who was the ONE to show you that I WILL PROTECT YOU always and be by your Side and also to LOVE YOU forever in my Heart.. and I would start to cry looking at your crying.. It was me that DAY.. My Promises I made to YOU has come true this Far.. and I am sure YOU heard what YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA said that day because I saw YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. sitting on the top of the Horse and YOU LOOKED at me and gave me that smile.. I still remember YOUR SMILE.. How can I NOT.. I WILL NEVER forget that day because it is YOU who I love.. it is YOU who I wanted to protect and to be close to YOU and to help you to rebuild this NATION.. because I never stopped Loving you and still I love you this Day.. and as I would look at you through the Bars.. I see you crying LOOKING at the Drawing Picture of and NOW you remember.. NOW THE QUEEN REMEMBERS.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH remembers Me.. that was ME and Now here I am in the Prison.. ready to DIE.. but before I die.. let me keep my Word.. my promises I made to YOU.. Just please HELP ME HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HELP ME.. YOU are the Only ONE who can Help me.. so that I can still have the time to Love YOU MORE.. I just want to love you until I die.. My QUEEN..I am looking at the Bars.. I need to see you HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as I am sitting on the Prison Floor.. and Behind me is the Art Sketch Paper.. in these dark times when I can't be with YOU.. and without Your Presences and Only way for my Heart to get through the days is when I have the Art Sketch paper.. Drawing Picture of YOU and I am just waiting in the silent.. I know that the Prime Minister and Other Council of Noble Men is putting the Case against Me.. saying that it is TREASON.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. I know that if I must Die tonight.. if they press the Charge against me.. please let my name be known that I am the One who Loves YOU the Most.. if YOU want to write something about me.. please let it be known that I have always Loved You.. and that you have saw everything what a Man can do when it comes out of Heart when a MAN truly Loves YOU.. and as I would be holding with Both Hands the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU and I would be looking at your Beautiful Face.. I would say and whisper.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO.. you are the True QUEEN of my Heart.. my Love.. my Queen.. who I have been loving for a Long TIME.. and I am Not sure where did It all start.. if I can go back when I first saw YOU.. when I took that first glance and How you shook my Heart.. and as I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would be walking with my Father.. and I would be sitting on the top of the Horse.. and my father pulling the strings and He is smiling walking ahead while the Horse is following and I am sitting on top.. and on the right side is the waters.. the ocean and I would to LOOK at the Sun.. and the Horse stops.. and my Father stops and he turns his Head looking at the SUN.. on the Other side.. the King.. PEH HA is pulling the Horse string.. and I can hear a Big Laughter as the strings of the Horse behind the King.. so many People from the Palace are walking behind the Horse.. the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH when YOU were young sitting on the TOP.. and the KING.. PEH HA Stops.. and the Horse stops.. and my Father turns too look ahead.. the KING who is standing there.. my Father walks faster towards HIM and falls on both Knee.. Head looking to the Floor and I would get Out of the Horse and I would walk faster AND also falls on both knees and Head to the ground.. and I hear the Voice to get UP.. and My father gets UP before the King and I was allowed to lift UP my Head UP and as I would stand UP.. I am standing next to my father.. I see YOU sitting on the TOP of the Horse and YOU turn Your Head.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH turns the Head to Look down and when I saw YOU for the first time.. I don't know what it is.. but My Heart.. I can feel my Heart beating but faster it kept on beating.. and I would fall on both knees.. and my father turns to LOOK down with the King.. and I see you sitting on the TOP of the Horse and YOU look.. I wanted to give you a Flower.. back in the garden is where I can find this ONE flower.. who reminds so much of YOU.. the Most Beautiful Flower to My Queen.. But I am Not sure.. if I pick the Flower from the Garden.. will you receive the Flower that I give that only can comes from my Heart.. what if I give it to YOU but you dismiss it.. and it can cause my Heart to break.. should I take the chance to give you the Flower.. it is a Flower that my Mother gave to my Father.. the Seed and told my Father before she died to plant the seed where she be buried and watch how the Seed will grow and produce into this Flower.. and I remember my Father planting the seeds she gave HIM and by the tree and it grew after a certain time.. I would walk with my father into the Garden.. going UP the Hill top where the Tree is there and the Flower grew there.. that it is her Heart.. when I love someone.. that this Flower can truly transfer and once that Love transfer through the giving of this Flower that Dreams can be made and Dreams of Love can come true.. it is in the Garden but on the TOP.. the Hill top where the Tree stands alone.. there is a bed where the Flowers started to grow from the Seeds that was planted and I wanted to give you this One Special Flower that came from the Seeds of Flowers and I know that it means.. the Flower is the QUEEN of my Heart.. only One Heart that I have and can give to YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. when I first saw YOU at the Ocean.. and How the King.. PEH HA.. He was the One who was walking ahead.. and HE was the One who was pulling on the strings of the Horse.. all the Noble men and generals.. the Prime Ministers.. all the high Officials were standing behind as the KING.. PEH HA was introducing the Next new Ruler to Be.. and How he was walking on bare feet and the High Officials were giving distance as HE.. PEH HA.. the KING wanted to be alone with YOU.. and How he wanted to show YOU that ONE Day.. you are going to take his Place because Other SONS were all behind with the HIGH OFFICIALS of the ROYAL PALACE.. but He has chosen YOU that Day.. I was riding on the top of the Horse.. my Father wanted to tell me Something.. He wanted to share a story to Me and has something very Important message to tell me that day.. On this day.. for the first time as My Father was pulling on the Horse and He was sharing about my grandfather.. which was his father.. that is when YOUR FATHER the KING.. PEH HA comes by himself.. bare feet and walking down alone.. and I believe he was telling YOU a story too and I met you there at the Ocean.. my Father loved the Ocean just like my Grandfather.. and I too love the Ocean waters.. and I am thinking.. Maybe HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN loves the Ocean waters as well.. I remember that day.. the Doctors of the ROYAL Palace came.. your Father's Feet.. PEH HA'S FEET was bleeding walking on the rocky road.. and I saw YOU watching.. but my Heart to saw you for the first Time and I knew.. YOU are going to be My QUEEN.. not just the QUEEN but also the QUEEN of my Heart who I can only Love YOU.. so Please.. I want to show YOU and take YOU to the Garden.. so that when you do go to the garden.. I want to show you that special Flower.. which is located in the Garden.. on the Hill Top of where the Tree still stands.. and I want to give you this Flower.. Now I am thinking of this Flower which I could Not give to YOU Yet.. it has been so long since I was at the Garden and Now.. WHEN I am sitting in this Prison.. and able to think about you More deeply.. this FLOWER.. I am wondering.. is that

MAH MAH.. SPECIAL FLOWER still there.. it is from the Seeds that my Father planted long ago.. but it is the biggest flower that came from many seeds when My Father planted at the bed by the Tree.. I called the Flower My QUEEN.. which means the Most Beautiful Flower stands Out from the rest because the other Flowers are much more smaller.. as I am Looking at the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. is it too Late to Know about this Flower.. am I just too Late to give you this Flower.. I want to give this Flower because I remember what my Father told ME because it came from my Dying Mother when she gave the seeds of flowers to my Father before she died.. to give the Flower when it grows bigger and when I grow older.. when I meet someone WHO I love the Most and WHO I believe is the One I call my QUEEN of my Heart.. the ONE WHO I been loving.. to plant it and let the seeds to grow so that when I find the ONE WHO I LOVE.. I can give you the Flower to tell YOU.. it has taken me so Long to remember.. because I have lost the focus of this Flower for many long years.. I just want to go back to the Garden to see that ONE SPECIAL FLOWER.. before I die here in the Palace.. I want to make One true wish before I go to tell YOU my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HOW much I love YOU and that I should of given you this Flower much sooner.. then I believe by now.. something could of happened right.. but I don't want it to be Never either.. just to take this ONCE last chance.. to tell YOU that what I heard and how it was passed down to me by my Mother.. if she is right.. I believe that Dreams of Love can be made and Dreams can come true because I do believe in this Love that it is very special.. just like YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that YOU are so Special to Me.. has been all this time and still YOU are.. age to age do Not matter because as long as it is My Heart who loves YOU.. I know that If it means to happen.. something to happen.. in that Garden.. on the HILL TOP where the Tree stands.. there is a bed of Roses there.. and when YOU LOOK at the Bed of Flowers.. YOU WILL find One special Flower that stands OUT alone.. that Flower.. her name is YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as I am given this Paper with the Ink.. asking the guard by the Prison Door.. gives me my request and I am sitting down.. writing with the Ink as it dips.. on this Paper I am writing the Instructions and telling YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. my QUEEN.. if I die here in Prison.. I know that I won't be able to tell YOU.. but with this Message I am writing.. YOU can go there to see it for yourself to see if it is true.. that ONE FLOWER belongs to YOU.. that it is YOURS.. I have been waiting for that Flower to be KNOWN to you but it has taken me so long to tell you this.. I believe Life gives YOU a story which so much things are happening that sometimes YOU DO forget to TELL YOU what is the Most Important.. as I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I really wanted to go with YOU.. it does Not matter if I die here in the Prison because at least in my life time I get the chance to tell YOU many times How much I love YOU.. watching you grow over time.. NOW you are the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and HOW you have succeeded after your Father.. PEH HA.. and I am just thinking back that HOW your FATHER.. PEH HA knew all this TIME.. He had to pass for the NEXT TO SUCCEED after HIM.. but YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA already Knew that YOU.. his DAUGHTER will become the QUEEN.. will conqueror after HE passes On and I am just thinking about HOW he just knew.. the DAY I meet you for the first time.. I was riding on the Back TOP of the Horse.. and How YOU were too riding on the back top of the Horse.. many servants and High Officials who works for the palace all came Out that day.. it was so amazing to watch Many of the Higher UP Officials.. Just standing.. giving the distance where the Father.. PEH HA.. the King wanted to spend Time alone with YOU that day.. and His FEET bleed through that WALK but he kept on walking.. and showing YOU how much HE loves to spend the TIME with YOU.. I saw that when I was sitting on back top of the Horse.. PEH HA.. the KING was smiling all the way through the walk.. that day when I lifted UP and stood before YOU on both feet.. I just knew YOU are the One.. when I saw YOUR FATHER.. smiling and LOOKING at YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that I heard him say looking at YOU.. the NEXT in LINE.. the One to conqueror after Me.. and I looked at my father and HE smiles looking at YOU and it knocked me to both Knee to go down.. two knees down.. Head looks on the floor.. my arms stretch Out before YOU.. I remember I heard the WORD from the King.. PEH HA when I did that to YOU before Me.. Your FATHER said LOOKING at YOU.. I will help protect this Nation.. that I will help to fulfill to build this Nation to help YOU and I hear the both Fathers smiling looking at Both of Us.. and my Heart.. I felt It being Alive.. I felt It come alive because I knew it is going to be YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. who I will Love you forever.. even in the Prison I can die here.. even in the battlefield of war.. I can die there too.. where ever you place me.. I will FIGHT to protect and to help build.. but to defend if I needs to just to protect YOU and just to Love YOU forever.. Please HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Just give me a Chance so that I can prove to YOU How much I love YOU.. Only YOU can find OUT if you can give me this CHANCE.. I will love you where NO MAN can ever love you like the way I love YOU.. Please give me the Chance to keep on loving YOU.. if YOU DO MY QUEEN.. even after I am gone you will KNOW and YOU will believe that a REAL MAN who loves YOU can really really truly Love YOU no Other way I can.. I just wanted to say to YOU.. that I love YOU.. I see YOU sitting on the King's Throne Chair.. and YOU stand UP.. pointing the Sword at the 1st top General and in the Outer court.. behind is a Place where YOU spar.. and I am looking at YOU.. Your Sword Points at me.. and I am wondering what does this Means.. and I turn to Look at YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. and I would go down on two Knees.. My arms stretch forward.. and My Head LOOKING at the Ground.. YOU point the King's Sword at Me giving me the Permission to speak.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. what does this Means.. WHY are you pointing the Sword to Me and the 1st Top general.. and there is the Messenger in the Back.. and I see YOU pointing your Sword at the Message at the back to Speak.. and the Messenger who has the scroll unfolds and shares about what is Going On.. the Enemies of the War is drawing Near and the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH wants me to challenge to Fight the 1st Top General.. and WHO WINS will take that Seat.. and I turn to Face YOU.. and my Head looks down to the Ground.. Your Sword Points at me to speak and I would say.. HOW can I fight the Best.. I am truly UNWORTHY to fight the TOP GENERAL.. I have NO training of Wars in combat.. this General wins battles at Wars and has helped this Nation.. I have heard that HE can KILL many armies with the Sword.. and I am Not much of that experienced of wars.. ONLY thing that I am good at right now is Loving YOU as My QUEEN.. the QUEEN of my Heart.. and I see YOU still pointing that sword and Pointing that Sword back to the TOP.. the 1st General.. and I would hear.. the Seven friends of Mine all comes behind Me.. two knees on the ground.. arms stretch forward and Heads looks to the Ground.. Please.. I can't fight the first.. the TOP General.. and I see YOUR sword still Pointing.. and It seems like the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH is Not having it at all.. and I see you stepping down the Steps to the Ground.. and the Sword on my Neck.. and I would say.. if you need to Cut me.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Please do so.. it is better for me to DIE by that sword.. I rather Die by your Sword because the Sword belongs to the ONE WHO I Love the Most.. if YOU would LIKE to end my Life right here.. Please so it Fast and Quick MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would lift UP my head and close Both eyes.. and I wanted to see you strike my down with the edge of the Sword.. I be the Most Happiest to even die by that sword because YOU KNOW that I am dead by the ONE WHO I love the Most.. I would watch the 2nd Top General and He comes behind the Seven friends of mine and two knees to the Ground.. arms stretch forward and Head looking to the ground with the Seven Generals who walks with HIM.. they all goes.. two knees hit the Ground.. arms stretch forwards and Heads all LOOK to the Ground and shouts together.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. SHOW MERCY.. SHOW MERCY ON US.. strike all of US together.. and I am thinking.. what is happening.. and I open both eyes.. and I see YOU back Off and I just can't believe what I am here.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOUR sword is close to My neck.. and It is ready to take my BLOOD.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. please strike Me down Now.. I am ready to Die.. ready to die by your Sword but before YOU strike me with that Sword.. remember HOW MUCH I Love YOU.. I don't care any More.. NOW the 1st general.. the Top best walks UP and He kicks Me on the chest.. without getting the permission from YOU the QUEEN.. and It makes me so Made for NOT HONORING who YOU are.. and HOW rude is that to do it without the CONSENT of the QUEEN.. YOU are Not the Princess any More.. but the One TRUE RULER NOW and I fall on the ground.. and I see YOU angry at the situation.. as I am laying on the Ground.. I would get UP from the GROUND.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. because of

MAH MAH.. This MAN has done without your WORD.. without your CONSENT.. without your PERMISSION I will take this Challenge.. and I get UP.. Now the Men would make a Big circle around and He walks to the Back where the sparring ground takes Place.. and without.. kicking me in front of YOU when He did Not ask for the Permission when YOU are standing there against my word.. I don't like that at ALL.. so I would walk to the Sparring Ground and the 1st TOP GENERAL stands there with the Sword.. and I am just.. How can he do this when YOU are speaking with me.. and did NOT even ask the permission or have the Word consent and I would pull the Sword Out of the sheath and I would LOOK at this General.. and I see you walking back UP the steps and YOU stand.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I see you POINTING the KING'S sword and YOU swing that sword to Fight.. and I look at Him and I just run UP with the Sword in my Hand.. HOW dare YOU to act rudely in front of the QUEEN.. Our QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Show some respect by Honoring and I would jump UP AND swing the Sword in my hand and the 1st General counter Blocks with his Sword and the Blades hit each Other and my two feet lands on the ground and I swing the Sword side way and Would JUMP UP doing the back Kick and I would kick HIS face with a round HOUSE kick.. the 1st General falls to the ground.. and I turn to LOOK at YOU MY QUEEN.. I will Not lose for YOU.. I know that the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH has chosen this Fight with a Purpose in the Mind.. I know that there is a reason why YOU have chosen us to do this.. BUT I just do Not like to show anything.. But just to remain close to YOU.. to just to Love YOU by your side.. I hate to Fight but if it is needed I MUST defend it for YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. and the 1st General gets UP holding the Sword and HE swings the sword left right left.. right left right at Me as I am going back countering Blocking the Sword.. hearing the Blades Hitting.. IF I lose today My QUEEN.. if I lose I know that I must die.. just the way it Goes But I just can't Die.. I need more years so that I can love you More.. I just got started to Love YOU MORE.. I can't just die like this right.. I need More years to see HOW FAR I can love you so that IT can Out grow from NOW.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN and I would grab the Sword Tight and I would Jump UP forward and I would start to swing back at the 1st TOP General.. and the Blades Keeps ON hitting each Other.. and I would side KICK and then move forward with the Back KICK and able to HIT him in the chest.. and I would Jump UP and do the SIDE kick and strike him on the chest again.. at least One thing that I have fully grown to Do in my Heart.. TO LOVE you when YOU were the Little princess.. I started to Love you since you were so YOUNG.. and I always dreamed of Keep on loving YOU till the End.. Now YOU are my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. my QUEEN and I still Love you as strong as I did when I was YOUNG.. this never changed.. My Heart of loving YOU have always remained faithful because NOW I KNOW how much I love you.. the 1st General looks at me.. hearing me speaking as I would turn too LOOK at YOU.. he just freezes watching me.. and knowing that I have loved YOU for such a Long time and I turn my Head to face Him and I would look at the 1st General.. the TOP Warrior and I would say.. if you know what a Love Is.. it does NOT matter How many people YOU have killed on the battle field if YOU do NOT even know what it means to Love a WOMAN.. it does NOT matter if it is the QUEEN.. I know that I must be punished.. and I will die for the crimes.. if the Law says I can't Love the QUEEN and I am going against the law.. I will stand in the court and will be trialed for the case.. If I should be charged to Die.. I am ready to DIE for the Heart of My QUEEN.. if I am a dead Man walking.. at least I had the once in a Life to LOVE.. to LOVE YOU my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. if people in the court wants to punish me and this is a Crime to Love YOU.. I am standing and I know I am ready.. I have take so Many years to Love YOU.. and if I die today.. Please Bury Me with my parents.. and I would look at the 1st General and I would run UP and I jump UP and swing the Sword at HIM the Swords HITS.. the blades Hits and His sword falls to the Ground.. and the 1st General.. his two knees goes down and I put the sword on his Neck.. and I can hear the cheers of the Military troops shouting Out and I turn my Head to look at YOU.. and I see that YOU have pointed your Sword NOT TO KILL him.. your head telling me NOT TO strike Him and I raise UP the sword into the Air.. and I would shout.. and I turn around.. TWO KNEES hit the ground.. dropping the sword to the ground.. my arms stretch forward and Head looks to the ground.. and I am crying.. because YOU are standing there.. the Messenger behind is promoting me to be the 1st top General.. and I am just weeping and mourning in Joy.. and I see your Sword.. pointing at me.. and knowing that you want me to speak.. But my Words.. it is because the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH believes in me.. it is because YOU have given me a chance.. how can I come this Far.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. YOU even gave me this Permission to speak and to tell YOU about what it means to Love YOU.. even this is the Once in a LIFE time chance you give me.. I am suppose to be punished.. either be stoned to death.. die by the sword or hanged by the ropes.. YOU gave me the chance to share HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.. I can be arrested and be thrown into prison and also it can be a treason for the Nation.. and I know that without Your consent.. without YOUR PERMISSION.. how can I dare to open my Heart to share this Heart of MINE to YOU.. I know that if the law stated.. a LOW BORN like myself cannot LOOK at the ROYAL BLOOD LINE because it means treason.. I am a traitor of because I was born from the Lowest Class.. I am the son of a SLAVE MAN.. BUT to give me a Chance to walk into the training Ground.. and I had NO learning.. but only skills I was given was from the Old Man.. the teacher and also from my Father.. who gave me what they know but Nothing More.. when YOU LOOK at the birth right.. I am NOT suppose to be here.. and It is because when YOU saw me.. with the Official seal.. you could of still reject me because of the back ground of where I came From.. many Noble YOUNG MEN were only allowed to come into the training Camp and the ground into the Royal Palace.. LOOK at the chances of How much the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH gave me.. even this was a Once in a life time.. without your Permission.. without your consent of the Word How can I even challenge the 1st Top General.. it is IMPOSSIBLE.. but YOU have allowed and granted a WISH but I am NOT even allowed to be here.. NOT even as a PALACE GUARD.. I cried and Cried when YOU looked at the Official seal and YOU LOOKED at me and gave me the Permission to come into the Training ground.. when I saw YOU and How you looked at the Guard who was by the back gates which IT lead to the training ground.. I just could NOT believe because I was waiting for many days.. MANY people had to go home and were NOT ALLOWED.. but when YOU saw me.. YOU looked at me and told me I can come IN.. I cried that NIGHT.. because I needed only ONE CHANCE.. just a ONE SHOT and started to Love YOU because why would you even care about this Low Born.. a SON who was born to a SLAVE MAN.. why would you even give me this kind of chance.. and I would cry looking UP at the MOON.. that just for this ONE CHANCE in a LIFE TIME.. I will never disappoint YOU but show YOU what a REAL MAN.. who is from the most lowest Place can DO.. NOW.. YOU are the QUEEN of the Nation.. in the highest position taking on the highest chair.. and MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. YOU have given me the chance to fight.. just to raise me UP to the 1st TOP general.. and I would be looking at the Ground with my tears falling down.. giving me dreams to dream BIG.. How can a MAN dream like this without YOU giving me this kind of permission.. this kind of chance to be here.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. I wanted to thank YOU so Much for believing in Me.. Not just the miracle of life.. but even How much I love YOU.. I never stopped dreaming but kept on dreaming that Dreams can come true as long as YOU love.. I have never stopped loving YOU still.. this is the main reason why I am so driven and so determine.. so that YOU can see the Heart of MINE that I still LOVE YOU.. that watching YOU taking your Father's Place.. which HE once ruled as the KING.. NOW you are ruling in his Place as the HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would see the Seven friends of MINE.. they come behind me.. two knees goes to the FLOOR.. arms stretch forward and HEADS all look at the Floor.. the 2nd Top General and even the 1st top General with their generals all.. two knees Hit the floor.. arms all stretch forwards and Heads all look on the ground and tears of these Men weeping before YOU showing HOW much YOU mean to Us.. as the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH MANSAE!! and My hand grabs the Sword and I raise it UP to the Air and SHOUT LOUD and Clear.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MANSAE!! the voices of the Men behind me all raises UP.. HOORAY to My QUEEN.. MANSAE TO HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HOORAY TO MY QUEEN.. YOU are the true QUEEN of MY HEART and shouts so LOUD it shakes the ground together.. MANSAE to my QUEEN.. HOORAY TO HWANG WOO MAH MAH and we all cry together

I been wondering about YOU.. as I am looking at your Picture.. How did I fell so Hard just by looking at your Picture.. but when I think of YOU and the Picture in my Hand is Not just an ordinary.. I know that YOU are truly talented.. truly Gifted.. the Most Beautiful.. and also you are very Bright.. so Smart.. just the Whole Package and I know if there is a way to get to YOU.. I would question.. with the mark and I remember.. in my hand I was holding a cold can of beer.. and walking Out side of the back.. I would stand.. there was the MOON up ahead.. having your Picture in the ROOM.. I put on the top of the desk.. and after Questioning How to get to YOU.. I would ponder How.. how can it work.. How can it let it be known to YOU if I am unable to get the Word out to YOU.. How am I suppose to tell YOU something if YOU will never Know.. it would bother me as I would be drinking the Cold can of Beer in my Hand.. I want YOU to know how I feel.. I want you to Know it because If I do Not tell YOU what is in my Heart.. YOU are Not going to ever Know How I truly Feel about YOU.. do you know How that feels.. when I needs to get it Off my Heart.. get it off my Chest and YOU are inside my Heart.. I am Looking at the Picture that is in the ROOM and sitting on the TOP of the Desk.. I want YOU to know My Heart.. when YOU are just keeping it Inside of YOU.. like this Cold can of Beer in my Hand.. and I am drinking it.. sipping it and Just LOOKING UP at the MOON on the back yard.. NO matter How many times I would walk Out side and walk Out in the back Yard.. if there is nothing but silent.. just the sad Moments of standing still unable to express.. it gets harder and harder as the days goes By.. and after I would finish drinking the Cold can of beer.. I feel dizzy in my Head but nothing would be done.. I go back into the House.. and just heading back to the ROOM and sitting.. Looking at your Picture in my Hand.. HOW do you know what My Heart feels.. when I want to tell YOU.. I want to express how this Heart of Mine truly feels but when there is Nothing but the Silent.. it just gets to Your Head.. because I am holding unto Your Picture.. but what good is it just looking at your Picture.. knowing that YOU are every man's Dream.. that I need to Love YOU.. that I needs to tell YOU that I love you and I just want to transfer that Love so that IT gives the ROOM for Your Heart.. for the Love to grow so that ONE day YOU are able to tell me or express.. or just to Love me.. I don't want it just be me who Loves YOU.. but just waiting for that Day.. to be honest with YOU.. that ONE DAY you will love me.. HOW can you love me when I do not Love you first.. or be Bold.. have the courage in my Heart to say IT until you understand me completely.. it is NOT about the TIME.. it is NOT about How much TIME must pass because I have grown to be patient and to learn HOW to be patient.. you have to remember HOW LONG I have been writing.. How long I been typing so I don't care about the TIME.. but ONE thing I truly wanted is LOVE.. all about Just Love that IT can pierce into your Heart and OPEN your Heart.. open your MIND that I do Love YOU.. and I wanted this to happen but just looking at the Picture in the front of ME.. it kills me.. feels like when I be going Out side.. in the back yard and all I can do is stare at the BIG MOON in front of me.. as I am getting drunk.. just kills me.. and I would be asking.. HOW.. I needs to tell YOU.. Please show me HOW.. I needs YOU to know that I want to tell YOU MORE AND MORE.. but HOW.. and I am sitting in the ROOM.. by the desk just looking at your Picture.. I would feel so sad.. my Heart would feel so broken because I need YOU.. I want YOU and I want to tell YOU that I really love YOU.. but just staring at this Picture.. and just looking at How beautiful YOU are.. all it does is kill me.. and I start to cry.. and just brushing off the tears off my face Looking at your Picture.. it is NO Fair.. I want to tell YOU.. so that At least you will know.. that Maybe not Now.. some times down the Line on later time.. you will finally get the picture of knowing.. I am Not asking you right Now to love Me.. when did I because I have never forced YOU too but I am just waiting for that TIME when YOU will really do but first.. I needed to tell YOU somewhere and some how.. as my hand be hitting my Chest.. the other hand lays on the Keyboard.. which it got me UP to LOOK at the Other hand laying on the Keyboard.. I can't believe what My eyes were looking.. my hand on top of the button of the keyboard on top of the desk in the ROOM.. I would turn to LOOK at the Other hand which my hand was holding unto your Picture.. placing it on top of the desk.. the hand would wipe my eyes from the tears I would be shedding.. and I turn to LOOK at the Other hand.. which was laying on top of the Keyboard of the computer.. and something hit me.. an Idea hits me in my Head from my Heart.. is this what it means.. can this really work.. will it work out.. can I tell you through the typing of the writings that I can give you many messages to letters.. and I just could not Believe because I needed to tell YOU something.. I needed you to KNOW that I love you.. that I wanted it more than just me be staring at your Picture.. why can't I tell you that my Heart be burning.. why can't I as a MAN tell you that I want to Hold YOU.. hold you in my arms.. at least you will know how much I wanted to be with YOU.. If I am like the ONE who goes OUT side in the back Yard.. and at NIGHT all I see is the BIG MOON and ALL I do is stare at it.. just a Picture but Nothing.. it is going to kill me from the Inside.. I would look at the key board.. and I would look at the computer monitor.. and I would laugh and then I start to cry.. I know that I am a digital Writer.. and I know with my WHOLE HEART.. with such great Passion I love to write and share.. I love it to death.. I been sharing for such a Long time and I am going to switch also to Tell YOU that I love YOU and I start to cry Louder and Louder as I am looking down at the Key board.. this Idea that came out of Nowhere but I want to tell you that I love YOU.. why can't I tell you Please.. why can't I tell you.. since I can't meet you in person face to face.. I know that I have Nothing to Lose.. if I die from it.. let it be so that at least I know that I can die at last after I reveal How much I love YOU.. until you can see me at the Grave.. when I die.. the day I die I know by that time you will finally see how much I love YOU.. you will say OH this MAN loved me so Much that He died of loving Me.. I want those words to COME OUT when YOU come to my grave stone.. if YOU see my Name on the grave stone.. you will know because I been waiting for you just too LONG.. and My Heart finally got sick that I had to let my Heart go so it took my Life because I have never stopped Loved YOU and still Loves you until DEATH it comes.. of course my Wish and my Desire.. my Dream is not to take me that far.. where you needs to find me underneath a Tree.. or YOU have to look at the Stone.. but before that day comes that I will Love you More.. you should know that I love YOU.. and also comes missing YOU so much.. that I can feel my chest be breaking and breaking on me.. when I looked at my hand laying on the TOP of the keyboard of the computer Monitor.. I just knew this was the Only Way and it is something that I can share and tell YOU from my Heart.. there was NO Other way Plus.. I have Nothing to Lose.. when YOU are at the BOTTOM ROCK in life.. and YOU know there is NOTHING but just going straight forward and Moving forward and just trying your best in what the Little I have been given and what it seems so Impossible.. looking at your Picture.. and going Out side at Night on the back Yard.. when YOU are LOOKING UP at the BIG MOON.. it feels so impossible for anything to happen.. the BIG MOON is so Far UP at the sky.. that Long far distance makes it impossible to touch that BIG MOON when you are standing at the Bottom rock.. but after my hand touches the Key Board and it gave me a Hope.. it gave me something to LOOK up too.. even though I may never get it to YOU.. maybe it means Nothing to YOU.. if I don't try.. I know it be worse for me of NOT even trying.. but I had to go all IN and I had to do what I can to know.. if I really Wanted YOU to Love Me.. it is better than Never finding OUT.. never trying because YOU think you will fail.. of course I would think about that.. but.. I knew that If I can type and write for a very Long time and YOU knew in your Heart.. that I can type very far.. that I am truly committed and devoted.. I will also be when it comes of Loving YOU.. loving you the Most where the WHOLE world will see it.. that people are going to know about it because I loved you from the Beginning and told Myself.. I will always love YOU and that is a PROMISE from my Word.. and I remember putting your Picture on top of the desk and I would pull the Keyboard toward my direction where I can see all of the key letters on the Board.. and I would smile.. I hope that YOU can really see my Heart.. NOT just my Heart.. but my WHOLE Heart who really loves YOU.. and I would place my hands on the key board as my finger tips would touch the Buttons of the Letter of the key board.. as my Head turns to LOOK at your Picture.. I would say.. I may have Nothing.. hitting at the Rock Bottom of Life.. I know that I am Not rich.. I am a poor Man.. I have Nothing to give YOU what material has its worth.. but let me tell YOU and show YOU one thing.. when It comes of Loving YOU.. I know and I believe that MY HEART can grow.. it can grow very Big in your eyes.. that One day YOU will see that my Heart becomes BIG.. that I have a BIG HEART when it comes ONLY LOVING YOU and telling YOU How much that I really Love YOU.. and how am I suppose to start.. I always start very small.. but it grows and grows after spending some

I am looking at the Empty Vase.. and I am thinking this Must be what I am thinking because.. I know that it was a gift that YOU gave me.. of course I still don't remember Much.. trying to remember has been so Hard for me lately.. but just little Piece by Piece.. the Clues in this Cabin Log Home.. I can feel that something happened between Us.. and I can see that One piece of the Puzzle.. the Clue must be this Empty Vase in the second ROOM.. I take the Flower Out and Pour out the water that was half filled and I would take it to the Living Room.. what hurts me the Most is that I am starting to Miss YOU.. is it because this Cabin Log home.. to be this Size of its own and I am here all by myself and maybe it is walking in this House with out YOU.. and How you also left the Pictures in the two Rooms.. and even going to the clinic talking to the doctor and I even showed the Doctor one of the Pictures that was in the two Rooms.. I had two Pictures both rooms.. the third Picture was under this Empty Vase.. and I am trying to figure Out why is this the Only One that brings something into My Heart.. I would stand in the Second ROOM.. Looking at the Sun Flower.. it was inside the half filled water of this Vase which is NOW an empty Vase I am holding in my Hands.. the Sun Flower is left on the top of the desk of the second ROOM and I am still wondering WHY was it there like YOU have placed the Flower like Yesterday.. as I was holding this Empty Vase.. what is the Behind story of this and why placed here.. and I remember I took it to the doctor.. I know that the Doctor must know something because He tells me to bring what was in the Cabin's Log Home because He can tell me something that only He knows and maybe can Help me to remember all about YOU.. SO I made an appointment to go see the Doctor.. when I heard who the Doctor was to YOU.. the relationship.. the Doctor is Your Father.. and I just could Not believe that what does it Means.. does it means that I loved YOU just too Much.. or how is it possible for me to be with YOU.. YOUR father is a Doctor and He is specialized and Operates in a way that Only the Best Doctor can.. I would.. I remember sitting and waiting for my Name to be called to meet the Doctor.. Your Father and I am looking at the Walls of many awards of winning as the Doctor.. who is specialized in surgery but also treats people who can't remember.. who lost in coma and loses memories.. and I am thinking at this Point.. How can a Person Like myself be loving someone like YOU if your Father is this Good at what He does and I am just a Nobody.. and I am holding the Empty Vase and the Sun Flower and three pictures of YOU.. and I know that I don't deserve to be with YOU.. as I am waiting.. My name is called to the Office.. and I get UP from the sitting Down.. and I walk into the Office.. Your Father who has a big Office sits and I go into the Office room.. and I would go and sit on the chair on the Other side of the Desk.. I place the Empty Vase and I put the Sun Flower next and put three pictures on the top of the desk and telling your Father.. the Doctor.. that I found these in the two rooms of the Cabin Log Home after I purchased the Home.. and the Doctor smiles.. Your Father looks at me.. and He starts to share a sad Story.. which it breaks my Heart but of course.. In a state I am In.. knowing myself More of where I stand in life.. I know that I would too.. and Yes.. I should of Never loved YOU because I never knew.. Your Father.. the Best Doctor who won many Awards by the state tells me.. Your Father would refused and did Not want me Near you which is His Daughter and Yes.. many nights.. YOU would fight and argue with Your Father because he did Not want to be a Part.. or take part because of Where Your Father is in life.. that He was known to be close to the Mayor and the Governor of the State.. won many prices and awards and Building many clinics and had dreams of establishing and EMPIRE as the TOP TIER DOCTOR.. and He wanted the Best for YOU.. he wanted someone WHO is highly skilled and talented.. very well educated and some one who can take his Place as the Next Doctor who can RUN the Clinics and When he saw Me which I never knew Of.. I did Not even know that Your Father would be this Big.. had Great Dreams to go further in Life and wanted to establish something so that HE can raise someone like HIMSELF to take over when He dies and of course.. YOU have never told me anything.. I did Not even know that YOUR Father was a Doctor.. IN FACT he is an Award Winning Doctor who won prizes and close to the Mayor and Governor of the state.. which I am sure in due time HE can run for the president.. Your Father tells me that YOU are just Like him in many ways.. very determined and Full of Will.. when YOU wanted something.. what ever it takes.. YOU WILL go get it done.. very Fierce is what HE called YOU and I guess many times the argument was that HE knows many YOUNG MEN.. like the NOBLE MEN he can introduce to YOU.. that YOU can have a Better Life and be Much more happier that He wanted to pass everything down to YOU.. but someone who can take His Place and When He saw a Picture of Me. and saw the way I dressed.. He was shocked and Angry because I am a Low Life Person.. seems Like I was going Nowhere.. had NO DREAMS or AMBITIONS and even asked about the education and training programs and I guess there was NO WORDS you can share in that senses and It drove Your Father.. the Best Doctor angry.. But of course I was a great appointed to Your Father the Doctor when He saw the Picture of me you have taken and It was with YOU.. I am standing next to you.. YOU are holding the Giant Teddy Bear.. and your Father points at the Picture of the third that THIS is the picture he saw of the first time.. the day when HE was so angry at YOU and just could Not believe that WHY choose someone Like me and I would Look at the Doctor and I told your Father.. the Doctor.. I am so sorry for being such great disappointment.. because If I knew this ahead of time.. How can I dare to do this to YOU.. and I would never do anything to Hurt YOU.. but of course.. I never knew about this until the Phone rang.. it was the Number of the Doctor and the Doctor tells me on the Phone that HE has something to Tell me.. and that I needed to come to his Office.. and he told me this.. that HE is your Father.. when I heard that the Doctor was a relative was your Father.. My Heart felt like it wanted to stop.. and Now I am wondering why did YOU NOT ever tell me about this.. you know this is very important to Me.. Your Father has worked so MUCH to come this Very to accomplish this Much in his Life.. to be the Best is NOT easy.. YOU know that YOUR FATHER wants the Best of YOU.. why Hurt your Father's Heart.. because I know that I am Lowly and Poor.. Not much I can give YOU.. you know that the CABIN LOG HOME is Not even My Home.. YOU are the One who purchased it and Now I see why.. I even heard from the Doctor.. that YOU are also going into the Medical school.. and Your Father is going to be teaching YOU SOON.. that YOU are going to learn all things UNDER his Care and Love.. and that HE is so proud of YOU.. YOU graduated and Now.. you are going to the clinic as YOU are going into more classes to learn.. when I heard all of these things.. I just could not say a word because I knew what I had to do.. I can't be with someone who has a Larger than Life.. YOU know that I am so small in many ways.. just that my Heart gave it all to YOU.. that I can only Love YOU.. I can't do much more with that is what is hurting me so much.. I want to do and show you more.. but HOW when YOU are going so Big in this Life.. and as I would look at your Father.. the Best Doctor and I am Looking at him smiling.. all I feel was this Tears.. I just ran down my cheeks and He knows that My Heart hurts Now.. of course.. I asked your Father.. the doctor.. I know that I needs to stop Now but what happens if I can't.. I know that I needs to let you Go.. but what happens the more I try to let go but I can't.. and I would sit on this chair.. in the Big Doctor's Office and I would just be in silent crying out.. because I know what he meant and I should respect His WILL.. and as I would get UP to Turn away.. I see you standing by the Door of the Office.. and I would look at you just standing still.. Looking at your Father.. who is the Best Doctor sitting on the Other side and looking at me as I get UP and turned to face the Door.. and I would keep crying as I would look at YOU.. Do you know that It hurts me More than if hurts YOU.. why do YOU have to be so Kind to Me.. why do you have to be so nice.. and Now knowing this Much of the truth hurts me one hundred times.. this Pain I feel deep inside.. if I never knew.. and If you just left me at the accident.. and if I was just lying on the hospital Bed and all you could do is drop me there and make it all unknown.. I could of been better because It seems like NOW I am coming back.. slowly this Memory and fitting into Pieces together.. but what GOOD is it if I do remember all of it but I can't be with YOU.. if I can't love you NO MORE.. what good is the memories for Me.. I rather be someone else then Myself if this Pain of Losing YOU Hurts me the Most.. as I would walk out of the doctor's Office room and I would leave.. I can hear your Voice screaming and shouting at your Father.. which it stops Me.. It is NOT his fault.. How is it Your Father's Fault.. Your Father Loves YOU TOO MUCH that is why HE is doing to for Us and I would start to cry More.. Because it hurts me.. WHY.. why do you have to be Like a Princess and LOOK at me.. and as I am wiping my tears I would walk away from the Clinic.. I know that I must.. but I forgot the Empty Vase.. I need the Three Pictures of YOU and I need that SUN FLOWER.. I need all those things and I would stop

To turn around.. I see you walking OUT of the Office with those in your Arms.. and YOU would stop and I would say to YOU.. WHY does Love have to hurt this Much.. WHY did you Not tell me this SOONER.. if I knew about this SOONER.. I don't think it would hurt me this Much because I would of been preparing my Heart for something like this to Happen.. and WHEN It does.. since I had the pain long ago.. I be used to the Pain that I can carry for a Long time.. but when it all Happen Now.. do you know that IT is killing me Now.. It is Hurting me Now and I just can't go on.. WHY DOES the LOVE HURTS so Much.. why Loving YOU HURTS me so Much.. that I rather.. and I see you giving me these things and YOU telling me to go back to the CABIN LOG HOME.. and that YOU WILL call me in later time.. as I am holding the things that I brought from the Cabin LOG HOME. I would turn to look the Other way and I would listen to YOUR WORDS and I leave the Clinic.. Thinking about WHY am I here.. and why am I looking at this Empty Vase.. what am I suppose to do with this Empty Vase.. I did received the Note in the first room.. and also got the chance to look at you through the Picture you have left behind.. I know that I am not suppose to have this Picture.. but why do MY hand keeps on holding onto the picture for.. I am trying to leave the Picture behind.. I should of left it in the first room.. on the top of the desk.. but for some reason.. My hand just could NOT let go.. it grabbed onto the Picture.. telling myself.. Just let it go.. I needs to let it go but My Heart says.. telling my Mind.. I know my hand will not let your picture go.. so I have decided to take the Picture with me to the second room.. I am standing here by another Desk.. Now I am very confused about this desk.. why does it look a like.. is it the same desk because I did NOT buy any desk.. I do remember.. when I was talking to YOU on the Phone.. YOU have mention to me that YOU are leaving something behind.. and I am wondering.. if it belongs to YOU.. why don't you just take it with YOU.. why do you want to leave something behind.. and if it is something precious.. something precious to YOU.. I do truly understand that IF YOU MUST need to take it.. Please take it with YOU.. it won't hurt me or bother me if YOU DO.. but.. listening to your Voice on the Other line.. YOU telling me that IT is a bonus for buying.. purchasing this Lovely home.. so I did tell YOU.. thank YOU.. if it is a gift from YOUR Heart to me.. then Yes.. I will receive it.. I will take this gift.. of course YOU never told me that it is going to be two desks.. a Picture with a Note.. and an empty Vase.. But.. I want to know.. what is the Use of this Empty Vase.. why did you not put a note what comes with this Empty Vase.. am I suppose to put flowers inside this Vase.. but it has half filled water.. so.. I guess you should of told me because.. I am looking at this Vase.. not completely empty but has half filled waters.. so I am looking at the CELL PHONE and I do dial your Number.. and I am waiting as I am hearing it ring.. I wait and I hear a Hello on the Other side.. and I tell YOU.. I am the One who just bought this Log Cabin Home from YOU.. and just wanted to ask YOU one simple question.. there are two desks.. one each in the room.. I have a picture of YOU.. am I suppose to have it.. can I please have this Picture because NOW I am the New Home Owner.. the Other Question is this.. what am I suppose to do with the Empty Vase.. it is half filled.. and I am waiting for you to answer.. and I hear your voice telling me.. It was not YOU who put the two desks.. and Yes.. the Picture is Yours.. and the Vase.. Not sure what that is.. but the vase Means Love.. I am just standing there.. thinking.. the Vase means Love.. what does that Means if it is Love.. YOU know that I am Not sure what YOU are talking about.. and I am waiting for YOU to answer.. and I don't hear anything.. and I hear.. DO I not remember.. I pause thinking.. remember what?? am I suppose to remember something.. and I hear.. I don't remember YOU.. and the Phone hangs UP.. It made me jump because you asked me do I remember YOU.. which am I suppose to remember some one and I am thinking.. I am holding a Picture of YOU In my hand.. why is it so hard for me to Let go of Your Picture.. and YOU are the One who left the Picture for me to see it.. and I am thinking.. was I suppose to stand still until I remember you.. until I do know who YOU are.. and then I was suppose to call YOU on the Phone to tell YOU that NOW I know.. and with this Vase.. I know that it must means something.. YOU have left it behind so that I can remember.. But.. why do I feel like my Mind is stuck.. I want to know.. I want to remember.. if YOU are telling me that this Vase means Love.. it has to do with me and this Empty half water vase.. I am suppose to know YOU.. the person YOU.. the One I am looking at this Picture.. I can't remember though.. on the Note it did say I got into an accident.. I was hit by a car so I must went to the Hospital and Blacked Out.. because I was told that some of the memories I won't remember.. How can I lost YOU.. How can I lose someone like you.. and I am looking at the Picture.. I was close to face my own death.. I do remember laying on the Hospital bed.. one of the doctors would say that I be calling Out your name.. of course the Doctor did Not know who I was calling Out too.. But I do remember when I woke UP from the coma.. the Doctor tells me some one came to visit me.. and was crying while I was sleeping.. in a deep coma.. holding my hand.. asking the doctor to save me.. to save my life and begging the doctor.. the doctors all came to help out.. of course the doctor who was the main care taker told YOU.. that I am going to have a loss of memory and I would not remember much.. I do remember sitting UP on the Hospital Bed.. the doctor tells Me.. I was very close to death.. and he did all he can and for some reason.. I would be calling out your Name.. and that is HOW I got UP.. the doctor would look at me asking me.. who is the lady I keep on calling out too.. I was saying a Name.. but I sat there just puzzled.. a NAME?? the doctor said.. because of her Name I was able to get UP.. able to open my eyes.. able to come back to Life.. to breathe again.. if I did not call Out your Name.. I think what this doctor means.. I would of been dead.. I am wondering.. the Name.. I keep on calling Out your Name.. for the longest.. I am here trying to figure OUT who you are.. because I know that I loved YOU.. I keep on looking at your picture and I would say to the Picture.. Is your name I LOVE YOU.. because that is the only Name I can think of.. to tell you from my Heart How much I love you.. what am I suppose to say.. I want to know too.. but I am going through some hard times and that part is trying to figure OUT about Us.. this mystery about what happened.. I want to know because I came to this New Home.. with two desks.. YOU told me that it was not Yours.. then whose desks are these if it is Not Yours.. if I bought this Home from YOU.. how come the desks are here.. and it looks so familiar too me.. as I would look at the vase.. I am not sure if I should keep this.. the Phone rings and I pick it UP.. and I hear your voice.. it feels like I heard your voice before.. I think even before I called to buy this New Home.. from the Log Cabin house.. and I hear you asking me do I remember.. and I am standing here in the second room.. I want to remember.. But.. it is even harder for me because I do not remember.. only YOU can help me to remember because I sure have no clue.. I have No idea at this point.. please help me to remember YOU.. I want to remember.. can I ask YOU this.. DID I love YOU very much.. Is it me who loved YOU.. can you please tell me the answer and I hear.. Yes.. that I loved YOU.. and My Heart starts to pound hard.. I am thinking.. then why can't I remember YOU if I loved YOU so Much.. but One thing for sure is this.. My hand can't put your Picture down.. I feel like I want to cry because I keep on holding to Your Picture.. what am I suppose to do.. that is why I am asking YOU.. if I loved YOU.. I feel something in my Heart.. and How about this.. can I throw this Vase away.. since I don't know what is the use for.. what am I suppose to do.. put fish.. How about goldfish inside.. I don't even like fish.. and I hear your voice.. it is Love.. and I should not get rid of it because in due time YOU be telling me I will remember.. that One day.. some day soon.. if I love YOU very much I will remember.. and I stood there.. speechless.. my words did Not want to say no more because I know that YOU are right.. yes.. I will remember YOU because I know that My Heart really really Loves YOU.. How much if YOU asked.. I don't know because I have lost count.. when YOU go outside in the Night and count the stars.. and if YOU can't count no more.. I know that it is more than those Numbers you counted and lost counted.. that is How much I love YOU.. I would try to count the stars.. I did lost the count.. just too much.. too much to count.. as I would stay on the Phone.. I would hear you telling me.. the House is a nice place to live.. and that YOU loved it.. and I would ask.. WHY did YOU sell this House.. if YOU really loved it.. and not much YOU would say so there is a true mystery about this Place.. about this Vase.. about YOU.. about the picture.. and I don't remember much.. as I am looking at your picture.. I would say.. will YOU allow me to see YOU.. will you give me the permission so that I can know YOU in person.. will you give me the chance to remember YOU.. because right Now.. I don't remember anything at all.. all I do remember is your Voice.. YOUR voice sounds to familiar like I have known you for a Very long time.. that is the only feeling or thought I am getting when I listen to Your Voice.. it moves My Heart where I want to see YOU.

YOU live very far.. and that right now is Not the good time.. and it breaks my Heart.. because I want to see YOU.. I want to know YOU.. so that YOU can help me to remember How much I loved YOU.. will you let me stay a little longer on the line.. I know that YOU are going to tell me something.. that YOU needs to go.. but what If My Heart does Not want to let go.. just like my hand.. holding to YOUR picture.. it just will not let it go.. I think because I know why.. it is like looking at this vase.. it is love.. loving YOU still.. just loving YOU because My Heart remembers loving YOU.. even though I don't my Heart just knows.. Please.. tell me.. give me a clue.. give me a Hint.. and I would put the picture face down on top of the desk.. I open the door.. comes into the House.. I see large boxes.. two Large boxes enter the first room.. and another two Large Boxes places in the second room.. I see couch.. I see tables chairs.. More boxes comes into the Log Cabin home.. on the Diner room and the living room.. into the kitchen.. I see the Movers walking in and Out of the home.. as I watch the movers walks.. they enter the truck and it goes.. I would be out side.. it feels so good when it is cold.. with my jacket.. I am standing out.. I watch the SUN goes down.. still the SNOW on the ground and I am looking UP to the Sky.. Night Comes and I am looking at the Moon.. I don't know why I think of YOU the most.. especially when I see the Night.. when I look at the MOON.. I start to think of YOU.. do I miss YOU.. I am thinking right Now.. Do you think that I miss YOU.. if you ask Me this question.. standing Out here in the cold.. watching the SUN setting.. as the Wind starts to blow.. the wind chill makes me shiver.. that is how I feel when I think of you.. I get these cold chills.. sending shivers down my spine because I do miss YOU.. feels like when I walk Out.. and I look Up at the Sky.. looking at the MOON.. it is how I feel when I miss YOU.. that I want to see that MOON because I know that down in my Heart.. I think of you the most when I do see that MOON.. do I smile.. I want to smile.. because all I do is smile when I know that YOU are in my Heart.. that you are IN MY MIND and in my soul.. just can't stop think of YOU.. I would look at that MOON.. I am trying to think of the past.. when was the last time I seen YOU.. that I do miss YOU.. I miss YOU more and more.. as I turn to the direction.. I am looking at the door of this Cabin Log Home.. my hand grabs on the door knob and I am wondering.. I have lost my memory.. but I want to know.. I want to know how much did I loved YOU.. YOU would not tell me how much.. if YOU knew me before I lost my memory.. would you not tell me because I asked YOU.. I asked you on the Phone.. How much did I love YOU.. I would wait for your answer.. I just don't remember because I do want to remember.. I asked YOU.. but why can't YOU answer me.. YOU told me that I did Love YOU.. I asked you the question.. DID I love YOU?? there was a short paused.. and a breathing I heard.. I asked YOU the second time.. DID I love YOU?? Please tell me that I loved YOU well.. did I love YOU the way YOU should be loved.. I wanted to know.. I kept on pressing to ask and asking YOU.. I was holding onto the phone.. just waiting for YOU to answer.. there was a short pause and I heard you telling me.. I did love YOU.. and I do remember I just could not say another word.. My Heart.. for some reason it started to Beat faster.. Like I would be running and slowing down trying to catch my breathe and when I stop for a break.. My Heart would beat as like the beat ran faster.. that is HOW My Heart felt when I heard YOU telling me that I did Love YOU.. of course I want to love YOU.. I want to keep on loving YOU.. and I asked again.. How much did I love YOU.. can YOU please tell me.. if YOU answered the first question.. I know for sure you can answer this One.. Please tell me so that I can hear my Heart beat faster when YOU give me the answer.. I heard YOU not say a word.. but why.. YOU told me that I did love YOU.. why couldn't you tell me More.. I want to know.. if YOU can remind me.. maybe I can know.. maybe my memories can come back to Me because I did hear my Heart beat faster when YOU answered the first question.. I really Really want to know.. as I am standing by the door.. MY Hand grab hold unto the Door Knob.. ALL I need to do is turn it and open the door.. I can go into this Log Cabin House.. this New Home that I brought.. before the Movers came.. I do remember One large Box came before the Movers brought many boxes.. smaller and larger into this New Home.. One Large box.. I placed into the ROOM.. the first room.. I do remember opening the top of the Box.. I saw a Picture frame.. it was YOU inside the picture frame.. YOU were sitting on the Couch that just came into this New Home.. I don't remember YOU sitting on that couch.. but YOU were holding the vase.. placing on top of YOUR Lap.. the same Vase that was in the Second room.. but there was a Stem of a Flower.. YOU were smiling and I looked at it.. I don't remember any of it but tears.. there were two lines of tears falling down from my eyes.. as I would look at the picture frame.. inside the picture of YOU siting on the Couch.. I felt so sad because I.. I want to know when was this taken.. I want to know who has taken this Picture.. was it me who was holding the camera.. It must be me because I do know that I loved YOU.. and if that couch came as the Movers brought them into this New Home.. it must been a previous time.. which Home.. whose apartment.. if that Couch belongs to me.. then was it at the old apartment.. was it at a Home.. I just can't remember.. Please help me to remember where and when.. from WHO.. I know that it must be me.. because this One Large Box came yesterday night.. and I brought it into the First ROOM and I opened it to see.. So I know that it belongs to me.. I started to cry when I saw the Picture Frame.. My Heart was shattered because I want to remember.. I want to know when and where it happened.. I know that It was me who took this picture.. why would the Picture frame with YOUR Picture comes inside this Box.. but who had this is the Question on my mind.. was this Box with YOU.. are you the one who send this Box to me so that I can remember.. I did Not want to call YOU.. I knew that YOU wanted to know something but right Now.. I just can't tell YOU because I don't remember.. as I would reach.. my Hands grab onto the Picture Frame.. I am looking at it.. my tears kept running down my cheeks.. I want to remember.. I want to know.. But I do not want to tell YOU anything because if I don't know.. the way My Heart is breaking right Now.. you can feel the say way too.. I looked at the Phone.. I wanted to dial.. but I told myself I am not going to call YOU.. if I don't remember and has NO answers.. I just can't.. if Tears are flowing down my eyes.. I don't want to imagine Your eyes with tears.. If I loved YOU and My Heart still loves YOU.. I just don't want to hurt YOU.. I rather be the one who is hurting.. I want my Heart to be breaking and shattering instead.. SO I decided not to call YOU.. I rather be the One to be hurt.. and feeling hurt by myself.. it is because I love YOU.. that is the only answer I can tell YOU.. that I love YOU.. My hand turns and opens the Door.. and I walk inside the Log Cabin Home.. it feels more alive with stuff inside the house Now.. felt so empty when Nothing has arrived in this Home.. I would walk to the second room.. as I am standing by the Door.. I am looking at the Vase.. in the Picture of the picture frame.. a Flower was inside.. it was a Sun Flower inside the vase.. maybe that is what is missing.. maybe I should put a SUN FLOWER inside the Vase.. is that what was empty in that vase.. maybe that is the answer YOU want to hear.. But.. what if that is NOT it.. I think there is something more deeper than just a Flower.. what do I want.. what do I need from YOU.. why did YOU leave this Empty Vase.. why do I have to question myself if I can just ask YOU.. But I did end UP asking YOU.. YOU told me that YOU are NOT going to give me any answers because it is ALL UP to me to figure that OUT.. WHY would you put this Vase.. an empty Vase in this room.. why not in the first room.. why the second ROOM.. have I been here before.. so much un answered questions I must know.. But YOU would not tell me.. as I am looking next to the Vase.. I put the Picture Frame next.. beside it.. and ALL I am looking at is Your Beautiful Face.. Your Smile.. how this same Vase sitting on top of Your Lap.. with a SUN FLOWER inside.. I want to know.. when and where.. that Couch is in the living room of this House.. I just can't remember.. I want to remember.. why don't you call me.. I don't want to call YOU because YOU are going to wonder do I remember anything yet.. because right Now.. I just don't remember anything at all.. but I do wish I knew.. I wish I know now.. but right Now.. all I can think of is when and where.. I know that I must loved YOU.. the more I keep on looking at the picture in the picture frame.. I want to love YOU more.. I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. but How.. How can I tell YOU that I love you if I don't remember but my Heart is burning within me to tell YOU that I do.. only thing that I want to tell YOU.. I do still love YOU.. but I don't think you would believe anything at all.. because YOU do know that I don't remember.. but something in me tells me that I do.. How am I suppose to express this Love.. the word and to transfer the word to YOU.. that Even though I may not remember.. and has a memory loss.. something keeps on telling me that I do still.. that YOU did not lose any hope because I never stopped loving YOU.. WOULD YOU believe me.. I want YOU to believe these words of mine

Loved YOU a lot.. or More.. that Love will never just leave without a trace.. I know that if I loved YOU.. I will never stop loving YOU.. but.. would YOU believe in this truth.. would you believe me at all.. I am afraid that YOU would Not believe because I am at lost.. BUT Please.. know that I never stopped loving YOU.. YOU are only going to hurt me if YOU just don't believe my words because ALL I can say is that I do.. I just bought a New Home.. Leaving the City life into the Country side.. I am walking over the Mountains.. into the Hills and to the valley.. a Small Log House in the woods.. as I am walking through the Snow.. I stop to see.. the Flakes are falling from the Sky.. I am very close to the Log Cabin House.. Finally.. I have been waiting to get Out of the city life.. as I stop.. I am able to see the Snow flakes falling from the Sky.. as I unlock the Door.. and I enter the Small Log Cabin Home.. as I look into the Small Two bed room Home.. I am wondering.. why did I even buy a House with two rooms.. I have no one coming over.. but I know that If I prepare the place.. Maybe.. some one will show Up.. I have never met the person who use to Live in this Small Log Cabin house.. as I walk into One of the rooms.. There is a Desk.. I wonder why someone has left this Desk Behind.. something stops me before I turn to walk away.. I see something on the TOP of the Desk.. what is It.. I am wondering.. what is It.. SO I would walk closer to the Desk.. there is a Written Note.. and Next to the Note is a Picture.. of course I can only see the back of the Picture.. I am wondering.. maybe it must be the Picture of the Person who use to live in this Small Log Cabin House.. But why would some one leave a precious Gift behind.. if I lived in this House.. I know for sure I will Not leave anything special.. or Precious to me behind.. But.. should I turn the Picture over to see who this Person is.. I am standing there.. thinking of.. but I know that this is Not my picture.. WHY would I turn it over to look if it is Not for Me.. I am sure.. maybe the Person was in a rush.. and has forgotten to take this Picture.. but.. WHY would YOU write a Note for me.. I know that the written Note.. it is telling me.. giving me an instruction.. but why would you tell me something.. I can just live whatever I want.. I see the Note Next to the Picture.. Both are facing where I cannot see.. as I would stop.. maybe I should take a Look.. must be very important if YOU have written for the New Home Owner.. which I have purchased this Small Log Cabin Home from YOU.. I have never met YOU.. but Of course I do remember before the Contract.. YOU called me on the Phone.. and Got a chance to listen to Your Beautiful Voice.. Now.. I am very curious.. YOUR voice.. truly felt like I was listening to an Angel.. I know that If you sang a SONG.. I bet it would melt my Heart like the Snow Flakes.. I would stand Out side.. before I came to the DOOR.. to Unlock.. I would LOOK Up to the sky.. My hand opens.. I would watch the Falling snow flakes.. when It touched my hand.. it just melted and maybe Your Voice.. if YOU sang to Me.. My Heart can melt the way the Snow Flakes can melt into my hands.. I was smiling because I been living in apartment for a Long time.. just paying rent to rent monthly.. But.. Now.. able to purchase a new Home.. Out here in the Country side.. walking and climbing on the mountains.. just enjoying the fresh cold air as I would be walking through the Snow.. never felt so Alive in my life.. But Now.. I am here.. inside this Small Log Cabin Home.. and I just walked into a ROOM.. YOU did not take the desk.. there is a Picture laying on the TOP of the desk face down.. with a written Note facing down.. I am just wondering.. I remember when I picked UP the Phone.. and hearing your voice on the Other side.. on the Other line.. Your Voice.. it truly touched my Heart.. I begin to wonder more about YOU because of this Sensational touch.. Your Voice moved my Heart.. I felt it kick inside of Me.. and never felt that way before.. so I would start wondering.. I wonder How YOU would look.. as YOU were so happy to sell the House and even telling me Congratulation on the purchase of the New Home.. as I would share with YOU how I lived in rents all my Life.. but able to get a house means everything to me.. giving me a great deal in the purchase.. of course I wanted to ask YOU.. if YOU can sing.. because I wanted to know if YOU can sing.. can YOU sing a song so that I can listen to Your voice with my Heart opened.. but of course I never asked.. YOU probably think I am a crazy person.. as I am standing by the desk.. My hand grabs the Picture.. I wanted to turn it over.. I wanted to see the person who I just spoke with ON the Phone.. YOUR voice.. I just want to hear again.. can I listen to Your Voice.. would you let me call you on the Phone so that I can listen.. My Heart wants to listen to Your Voice again.. before I want to ask YOU.. I want to know how you look.. why are you so Nice.. why are you so kind to me.. I want to know who YOU are.. WHY would you leave this Picture behind if YOU have never met me.. if YOU have never seen me in person.. why leave me Your Precious gift.. Your Special gift.. I am nothing but a stranger to YOU.. what if I am a weird person.. some crazy person.. would YOU not be afraid of Me.. As I grab the Picture and turn to LOOK at it.. I see YOU sitting.. and My Heart jumps.. My Heart skips missing that Beat.. Just like Your Voice.. soft and beautiful.. I see your picture.. I see YOU.. YOU are so Beautiful too.. YOU are so Lovely.. feels like YOU can take my breathe way.. then what happens to my Breathe if you take it from Me.. what are you doing to me Now.. WHY leave this Picture behind and when I see this Picture.. I can feel my Breathe.. it wants to be released from Me.. I can't breathe.. my eyes wants to say I can't breathe because YOU are so Beautiful.. as I am looking at the Picture of YOU.. YOU are sitting down.. and I am wondering what is it that YOU are holding.. Why are you holding a Vase.. is it a vase for flowers.. I am not sure why YOU are leaving this Picture with Me.. what does it means.. why are you showing me this Picture for.. I have no clue.. I have no idea.. but why are you letting me see this picture.. and making my Heart to say I want to cry.. I have never met you before.. But How is this possible for Me.. why do I feel like I want to love YOU.. please tell me how can this be true because I have never met you before.. as I am looking at your arms holding this vase.. why is it empty.. are YOU not suppose to put something into that Vase.. it is an empty Vase Your hands are holding.. Please.. OH Please tell me what is the meaning of this because I want to know.. I have no clue.. I have no idea why you are showing me this.. I don't see any empty Vase.. but only this Picture.. with a Note.. so I would go over.. my hand grabs the Note and flips to look.. and YOU have written to me about the Picture.. and telling me about the Vase.. an Empty Vase.. and YOU have left it on the Other Room.. and I am not sure why YOU would tell me this.. what am I suppose to do with the Empty Vase.. I don't have any flowers.. and all it tells me to take good care of the Empty Vase.. and Now.. YOU are letting me to keep it.. so I am standing in this room wondering.. YOU are giving me this Empty Vase.. but I have no flowers to put in it.. so what am I suppose to do with this.. SO I would turn around walking out of this room.. the Other room is next on the right.. as I enter the second room.. There is another Desk.. and ON top of the Desk is the Vase.. an empty Vase sitting on the top of the Desk.. am I suppose to tell you something about this vase.. am I suppose to share with YOU what I want to do because it is Not making any sense with me a this Point.. I feel like I am Not the Owner of this House anymore.. since YOU are leaving things behind for me to take care of It.. I am not a male servant.. and NO.. I am not here to clean this House either.. I just purchased this House from YOU.. but WHY do I feel like there is a person who Owns it and maybe I am just renting this Place.. that is how I am feeling because.. I have to watch over things that does Not belongs to me.. I have brought my own bags and luggage so that NOW I can live in this house.. and I stand on the second room.. Looking at the Vase.. has water inside this Vase so it is Not completely empty.. but still looks empty to Me.. so I walk over to the second Desk.. I see a Picture with the Face Down.. so is it a Prank.. is this a joke because I am not feeling it at this Point.. my hand grabs and I turn to look at the front.. I see a Picture of a Heart.. as I am looking at the picture closer.. YOU have taken a picture of a Heart shape.. it is a Pillow I can see.. but why are you showing me this Picture.. I know that I love Heart.. but what does it means.. why are you doing this to Me.. are you playing games with me.. saying there is a Picture in the second room.. maybe YOU love pillows with Heart shape.. are you trying to tell me something through the two pictures YOU have put face down.. and there is a Number written on the corner of this Picture.. and I know that It is Your Number.. Looking at my phone.. I would check if this NUMBER is the same Number you called me on the phone.. and It matches correctly.. I am very confused.. I am so Confused because why would you show me these things if YOU don't know me.. and there is a Note also.. it was next to the Picture.. My hand goes over to grab the Note and I turn it over to take a LOOK.. and I would read it.. it says.. Do you remember Me.. when we were YOUNG.. because NOW I remember YOU is what the Note been written ON.. and I am thinking.. Have we ever met before.. DID I see you when we were YOUNG.. I don't really remember meeting any one when we were Young.. but it seems like YOU know me.. why would you tell me this

Another person.. but then knowing that it is I who just purchased this House.. It has to be for Me.. who else lives in this House.. I am the only one who bought this House from YOU.. so I know that we met before.. and telling me when were young.. HOW long was this.. How old was I when I met YOU.. Please tell me.. and I am thinking about calling YOU on the Phone.. But.. I am Not just going to call YOU and say I don't remember YOU.. so How am I suppose to answer this question because I don't remember.. I am trying to go back.. way way way back to see if I do remember you.. I am closing both eyes.. Both.. Nothing I can see back then.. why.. when did we ever meet before.. I am looking at Your Picture.. the Picture of YOU holding.. arms around the Empty Vase.. and I would look at the Picture.. WHEN was it that we meet.. I have No clue.. Please give me a Hint.. I feel like I am a crazy person.. LOOKING at the Picture of YOU and just talking.. knowing YOU are Not going to answer back from It.. that is How crazy I am becoming because Now.. I am wondering.. when and where.. what age.. what school.. was it in the apartments.. NOT sure.. but Please tell me when because I truly want to know now.. I hate it when things are so mysterious.. I want to know.. YOU are the only one who knows that is why YOU are asking me.. what am I suppose to do and how do I say this to you if I tell YOU I don't know.. it can hurt you as much it will hurt me not knowing.. Please.. tell me.. give me a clue.. give me a Hint.. and I would put the picture face down on top of the desk.. I am looking at the Moon.. I am waiting for YOU.. just thinking about YOU.. Looking at the Moon.. I feel like I am starting to Miss YOU.. when can I see YOU.. can I hear Your Heart.. Can I see your Heart.. Please let me touch Your Heart.. because I need YOU.. I truly need YOU to love me Back.. only wish.. Only hope.. only dreaming if YOU can show me your Heart.. as I am looking UP toward the Moon.. I can picture in that Moon.. the Shape of Your Heart.. I want to see Your Heart.. My arm stretches Out.. my hand opens Wide.. my Other arm reaches.. stretches Out.. My Other Hand opens Wide.. if YOU can hear Me.. If YOU are able to hear.. Please listen with Your Ears.. Hear my words because I am talking to that MOON.. can YOU Hear through that Moon.. I want to know.. If YOU are Unable to hear my words.. If YOU are Unable to Hear my Voice.. On the Other side.. Is it Night.. because at this Point.. the Sun has went down and Now.. it is the Moon's Turn to get UP.. and I am looking at this Moon.. Hoping that It is Night on that Other side.. if it is.. Can YOU please come Out.. If YOU are able to see that MOON.. Please come Out from the Place YOU are.. I want to tell YOU something.. I want to speak and tell YOU something.. my hands are both open wide.. asking.. Can YOU Please give me Your Heart.. I will be standing still.. Until you give me Your Heart.. I been asking YOU for a long time.. Did you not forget.. ever since I first laid my eyes On you.. all I ever wanted is Your Heart.. All I ever talked about and asking YOU is for that Heart.. Please give me Your Heart.. Please Open your Heart.. I do not want anything else but Just for YOU to show me Your Heart and Please.. let me have Your Heart.. My Heart has been breaking.. It has been shattered into Pieces.. I am trying to put the Pieces of my Heart together.. without YOU.. I know that the Pieces of my Heart cannot come together.. that is why I am asking for Your Heart.. Only if YOU can show Me.. so that I can see the Shape of Your Heart.. and I can open my chest.. and Put your Heart inside the Chamber.. which been waiting for your Heart.. I need Your Heart.. I want to have YOUR HEART and Put close to my chest.. to see How can I live without YOU.. I know that I can't unless I have Your Heart.. I told YOU already.. How is my Heart be broken and How was it torn into Pieces and Cannot put it back together.. I broke my Own Heart.. So that I can put Your Heart instead of Mine.. that is How close I want to feel Your Heart.. to Feel the Beating of Your Heart.. to hear the Beating.. to hear the sound of Your Heart.. I want YOU very close.. SO close that I can hear Your Heart inside of Me.. so that I can see YOU close.. I am truly missing YOU.. I don't know why.. because it is so Hard to explain at this Point.. if YOU are asking me.. WHY do I miss YOU so Much.. I just saw your Picture.. which I would have it close to Me.. I would take a Look at your Picture.. and only Wish.. Only Hope when can I see YOU close.. will you ever come close to Me.. because the More away YOU are.. the More I want to see YOU close.. the More I miss YOU.. the More My Heart breaks.. breaking and hearing the sound of my Heart.. just breaking into pieces.. and I want to know.. Does Love hurts.. does it hurt you.. because for Me.. it hurts to Love YOU.. it hurts me so much that I can feel the breaking of my Heart.. I want to cry.. I want to cry a lot because it Hurts me more when I don't see YOU.. when I miss YOU.. when I step out side.. and I stand still in silent.. and I look UP.. toward the Moon.. I want to shout at the Moon and Cry when looking at the Moon.. I would say.. Can YOU please come Out tonight.. I wonder if it is Day.. Or is it Night.. If I am able to see the Moon tonight.. can YOU Please step Out side.. On the Other side.. do YOU see the Moon appear before Your eyes.. Look UP at the dark skies.. do you see the stars.. do you see the Moon.. if YOU can see the Moon appear before YOU.. Can YOU Hear me.. Can YOU Hear my voice.. Listen to my words because there is something very Important that I would like to say.. to tell YOU.. and I know for sure you know this and maybe heard it more than thousand times by Now.. But I never get tired of telling you this.. I just hope that YOU never get tired too.. If you do please tell Me so that I can stop.. if YOU hear me.. Please LOOK at the Moon.. can YOU see that MOON.. the same Moon that we can see together.. as I am standing still alone.. I am here by myself.. Looking at that Moon.. I been coming here.. from time to time.. when I think of YOU a lot and my Mind.. it gets very busy because I am thinking of YOU.. before I came Out side.. I saw Your Picture.. I saw the Picture of YOU smiling.. when I saw Your Picture.. My Heart was touched.. I put my hand on the Chest.. and I can feel the Beating of My Heart.. and I would tell Your Picture looking at YOU.. I love YOU.. YOU do not know How much I love YOU.. I am still here.. I am still able to tell YOU.. I am able to write to YOU still.. that shows that I have never lost the touch.. that I think of YOU always.. when I saw Your Picture.. it felt Like I got drunk.. I wanted to fall.. and sit on the floor.. I felt dizzy and my knees got weak when I saw YOUR picture.. I told myself.. I should Not keep on looking at your Picture.. because once I start to look.. I would miss YOU.. Missing YOU leads me to walk Out side.. Missing YOU leads me to Look at the Moon.. and my eyes would wander looking UP at the sky.. Looking for the stars.. and Looking for the Moon.. I would close my eyes.. Both eyes shut closed as I would put YOU in my Head.. a Picture pops in my Mind as I would think of YOU.. and envision YOU.. wanting to see YOU.. I would open my eyes.. as I am staring at the Moon.. I would look at the Moon.. and I would open my mouth and say.. Do you know why I am here tonight.. Do you know why I am lead here.. I saw YOUR Picture.. I saw your Beautiful Picture.. saw Your Beautiful Face.. Now Look what YOU have made me do.. I am asking YOU if YOU can hear me.. Please say something back.. Please tell me something because My Heart is listening.. say something because My Heart is opened to listen.. Say something because my ears wants to hear Your Voice and Your Words.. Please say something because tonight is the Night I really want to hear YOU.. that this very Night.. for some reason I am missing YOU much more.. even though every night I miss YOU.. and I want to see YOU every day.. But on this very Night.. I really really want to hear from YOU.. I want you to Know that I love YOU.. I really really Love YOU.. Why can't I hear from YOU on the Other side.. is it because YOU can't hear me at all.. YOU know that every time I come Out.. every time I look UP at the sky and Look towards the Moon.. I am always expecting to hear from YOU.. but every night.. I would be the One who is speaking.. saying something as I am looking toward the Moon.. after I am done speaking as I am looking UP at the Moon.. I would be so sad.. My Heart be broken.. My Heart be breaking.. My Heart be crying as I would go inside back to the House.. because I would come Out side on this Night just to hear something.. Your Words and Your Voice but I don't hear anything from YOU.. I would be Looking UP towards the Moon.. asking YOU.. if You can Hear me.. if YOU want to hear my Voice.. to hear my words.. I am here this very Night.. I am standing here All alone.. Just waiting for YOU to show Up on the Other side.. if YOU can see the Moon.. If you can hear Me Out.. Please say something so that I know I am speaking to YOU as I am here On the Other side.. I want My words to be Heard.. I want my Voice to be Heard.. if I say the Word I miss YOU.. I am telling YOU from My Heart.. that Means I really Miss YOU.. if I say the Word I love YOU.. it comes from the Deep within expressing my Heart felt to tell YOU that it is what it is.. that I am telling YOU this because I do.. But I am not sure if My Words are being heard.. if My Voice is being heard on the Other side.. What If YOU are Not there.. What if It is Night there.. and yes.. the Moon has come UP.. but YOU are Not standing Out side where YOU can see that Moon.. I want my Voice to be heard for YOU.. I want my Words to be Heard to YOU.. because None of it is empty words.. it is Words that comes from My Heart and My

MAH MAH.. I am looking at the Bars.. I need to see you HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as I am sitting on the Prison Floor.. and Behind me is the Art Sketch Paper.. in these dark times when I can't be with YOU.. and without Your Presences and Only way for my Heart to get through the days is when I have the Art Sketch paper.. Drawing Picture of YOU and I am just waiting in the silent.. I know that the Prime Minister and Other Council of Noble Men is putting the Case against Me.. saying that it is TREASON.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. I know that if I must Die tonight.. if they press the Charge against me.. please let my name be known that I am the One who Loves YOU the Most.. if YOU want to write something about me.. please let it be known that I have always Loved You.. and that you have saw everything what a Man can do when it comes out of Heart when a MAN truly Loves YOU.. and as I would be holding with Both Hands the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU and I would be looking at your Beautiful Face.. I would say and whisper.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO.. you are the True QUEEN of my Heart.. my Love.. my Queen.. who I have been loving for a Long TIME.. and I am Not sure where did It all start.. if I can go back when I first saw YOU.. when I took that first glance and How you shook my Heart.. and as I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would be walking with my Father.. and I would be sitting on the top of the Horse.. and my father pulling the strings and He is smiling walking ahead while the Horse is following and I am sitting on top.. and on the right side is the waters.. the ocean and I would to LOOK at the Sun.. and the Horse stops.. and my Father stops and he turns his Head looking at the SUN.. on the Other side.. the King.. PEH HA is pulling the Horse string.. and I can hear a Big Laughter as the strings of the Horse behind the King.. so many People from the Palace are walking behind the Horse.. the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH when YOU were young sitting on the TOP.. and the KING.. PEH HA Stops.. and the Horse stops.. and my Father turns too look ahead.. the KING who is standing there.. my Father walks faster towards HIM and falls on both Knee.. Head looking to the Floor and I would get Out of the Horse and I would walk faster AND also falls on both knees and Head to the ground.. and I hear the Voice to get UP.. and My father gets UP before the King and I was allowed to lift UP my Head UP and as I would stand UP.. I am standing next to my father.. I see YOU sitting on the TOP of the Horse and YOU turn Your Head.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH turns the Head to Look down and when I saw YOU for the first time.. I don't know what it is.. but My Heart.. I can feel my Heart beating but faster it kept on beating.. and I would fall on both knees.. and my father turns to LOOK down with the King.. and I see you sitting on the TOP of the Horse and YOU look.. I wanted to give you a Flower.. back in the garden is where I can find this ONE flower.. who reminds so much of YOU.. the Most Beautiful Flower to My Queen.. But I am Not sure.. if I pick the Flower from the Garden.. will you receive the Flower that I give that only can comes from my Heart.. what if I give it to YOU but you dismiss it.. and it can cause my Heart to break.. should I take the chance to give you the Flower.. it is a Flower that my Mother gave to my Father.. the Seed and told my Father before she died to plant the seed where she be buried and watch how the Seed will grow and produce into this Flower.. and I remember my Father planting the seeds she gave HIM and by the tree and it grew after a certain time.. I would walk with my father into the Garden.. going UP the Hill top where the Tree is there and the Flower grew there.. that it is her Heart.. when I love someone.. that this Flower can truly transfer and once that Love transfer through the giving of this Flower that Dreams can be made and Dreams of Love can come true.. it is in the Garden but on the TOP.. the Hill top where the Tree stands alone.. there is a bed where the Flowers started to grow from the Seeds that was planted and I wanted to give you this One Special Flower that came from the Seeds of Flowers and I know that it means.. the Flower is the QUEEN of my Heart.. only One Heart that I have and can give to YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. when I first saw YOU at the Ocean.. and How the King.. PEH HA.. He was the One who was walking ahead.. and HE was the One who was pulling on the strings of the Horse.. all the Noble men and generals.. the Prime Ministers.. all the high Officials were standing behind as the KING.. PEH HA was introducing the Next new Ruler to Be.. and How he was walking on bare feet and the High Officials were giving distance as HE.. PEH HA.. the KING wanted to be alone with YOU.. and How he wanted to show YOU that ONE Day.. you are going to take his Place because Other SONS were all behind with the HIGH OFFICIALS of the ROYAL PALACE.. but He has chosen YOU that Day.. I was riding on the top of the Horse.. my Father wanted to tell me Something.. He wanted to share a story to Me and has something very Important message to tell me that day.. On this day.. for the first time as My Father was pulling on the Horse and He was sharing about my grandfather.. which was his father.. that is when YOUR FATHER the KING.. PEH HA comes by himself.. bare feet and walking down alone.. and I believe he was telling YOU a story too and I met you there at the Ocean.. my Father loved the Ocean just like my Grandfather.. and I too love the Ocean waters.. and I am thinking.. Maybe HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN loves the Ocean waters as well.. I remember that day.. the Doctors of the ROYAL Palace came.. your Father's Feet.. PEH HA'S FEET was bleeding walking on the rocky road.. and I saw YOU watching.. but my Heart to saw you for the first Time and I knew.. YOU are going to be My QUEEN.. not just the QUEEN but also the QUEEN of my Heart who I can only Love YOU.. so Please.. I want to show YOU and take YOU to the Garden.. so that when you do go to the garden.. I want to show you that special Flower.. which is located in the Garden.. on the Hill Top of where the Tree still stands.. and I want to give you this Flower.. Now I am thinking of this Flower which I could Not give to YOU Yet.. it has been so long since I was at the Garden and Now.. WHEN I am sitting in this Prison.. and able to think about you More deeply.. this FLOWER.. I am wondering.. is that ONE SPECIAL FLOWER still there.. it is from the Seeds that my Father planted long ago.. but it is the biggest flower that came from many seeds when My Father planted at the bed by the Tree.. I called the Flower My QUEEN.. which means the Most Beautiful Flower stands Out from the rest because the other Flowers are much more smaller.. as I am Looking at the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. is it too Late to Know about this Flower.. am I just too Late to give you this Flower.. I want to give this Flower because I remember what my Father told ME because it came from my Dying Mother when she gave the seeds of flowers to my Father before she died.. to give the Flower when it grows bigger and when I grow older.. when I meet someone WHO I love the Most and WHO I believe is the One I call my QUEEN of my Heart.. the ONE WHO I been loving.. to plant it and let the seeds to grow so that when I find the ONE WHO I LOVE.. I can give you the Flower to tell YOU.. it has taken me so Long to remember.. because I have lost the focus of this Flower for many long years.. I just want to go back to the Garden to see that ONE SPECIAL FLOWER.. before I die here in the Palace.. I want to make One true wish before I go to tell YOU my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HOW much I love YOU and that I should of given you this Flower much sooner.. then I believe by now.. something could of happened right.. but I don't want it to be Never either.. just to take this ONCE last chance.. to tell YOU that what I heard and how it was passed down to me by my Mother.. if she is right.. I believe that Dreams of Love can be made and Dreams can come true because I do believe in this Love that it is very special.. just like YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that YOU are so Special to Me.. has been all this time and still YOU are.. age to age do Not matter because as long as it is My Heart who loves YOU.. I know that If it means to happen.. something to happen.. in that Garden.. on the HILL TOP where the Tree stands.. there is a bed of Roses there.. and when YOU LOOK at the Bed of Flowers.. YOU WILL find One special Flower that stands OUT alone.. that Flower.. her name is YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as I am given this Paper with the Ink.. asking the guard by the Prison Door.. gives me my request and I am sitting down.. writing with the Ink as it dips.. on this Paper I am writing the Instructions and telling YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. my QUEEN.. if I die here in Prison.. I know that I won't be able to tell YOU.. but with this Message I am writing.. YOU can go there to see it for yourself to see if it is true.. that ONE FLOWER belongs to YOU.. that it is YOURS.. I have been waiting for that Flower to be KNOWN to you but it has taken me so long to tell you this.. I believe Life gives YOU a story which so much things are happening that sometimes YOU DO forget to TELL YOU what is the Most Important.. as I am Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I really wanted to go with YOU.. it does Not matter if I die here in the Prison because at least in my life time I get the chance to tell YOU many times How much I love YOU.. watching you grow over time.. NOW you are the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and HOW you have

MAH MAH.. Succeeded after your Father.. PEH HA.. and I am just thinking back that HOW your FATHER.. PEH HA knew all this TIME.. He had to pass for the NEXT TO SUCCEED after HIM.. but YOUR FATHER.. PEH HA already Knew that YOU.. his DAUGHTER will become the QUEEN.. will conqueror after HE passes On and I am just thinking about HOW he just knew.. the DAY I meet you for the first time.. I was riding on the Back TOP of the Horse.. and How YOU were too riding on the back top of the Horse.. many servants and High Officials who works for the palace all came Out that day.. it was so amazing to watch Many of the Higher UP Officials.. Just standing.. giving the distance where the Father.. PEH HA.. the King wanted to spend Time alone with YOU that day.. and His FEET bleed through that WALK but he kept on walking.. and showing YOU how much HE loves to spend the TIME with YOU.. I saw that when I was sitting on back top of the Horse.. PEH HA.. the KING was smiling all the way through the walk.. that day when I lifted UP and stood before YOU on both feet.. I just knew YOU are the One.. when I saw YOUR FATHER.. smiling and LOOKING at YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that I heard him say looking at YOU.. the NEXT in LINE.. the One to conqueror after Me.. and I looked at my father and HE smiles looking at YOU and it knocked me to both Knee to go down.. two knees down.. Head looks on the floor.. my arms stretch Out before YOU.. I remember I heard the WORD from the King.. PEH HA when I did that to YOU before Me.. Your FATHER said LOOKING at YOU.. I will help protect this Nation.. that I will help to fulfill to build this Nation to help YOU and I hear the both Fathers smiling looking at Both of Us.. and my Heart.. I felt It being Alive.. I felt It come alive because I knew it is going to be YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. who I will Love you forever.. even in the Prison I can die here.. even in the battlefield of war.. I can die there too.. where ever you place me.. I will FIGHT to protect and to help build.. but to defend if I needs to just to protect YOU and just to Love YOU forever.. Please HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Just give me a Chance so that I can prove to YOU How much I love YOU.. Only YOU can find OUT if you can give me this CHANCE.. I will love you where NO MAN can ever love you like the way I love YOU.. Please give me the Chance to keep on loving YOU.. if YOU DO MY QUEEN.. even after I am gone you will KNOW and YOU will believe that a REAL MAN who loves YOU can really really truly Love YOU no Other way I can.. I just wanted to say to YOU.. that I love YOU.. I see YOU sitting on the King's Throne Chair.. and YOU stand UP.. pointing the Sword at the 1st top General and in the Outer court.. behind is a Place where YOU spar.. and I am looking at YOU.. Your Sword Points at me.. and I am wondering what does this Means.. and I turn to Look at YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. and I would go down on two Knees.. My arms stretch forward.. and My Head LOOKING at the Ground.. YOU point the King's Sword at Me giving me the Permission to speak.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. what does this Means.. WHY are you pointing the Sword to Me and the 1st Top general.. and there is the Messenger in the Back.. and I see YOU pointing your Sword at the Message at the back to Speak.. and the Messenger who has the scroll unfolds and shares about what is Going On.. the Enemies of the War is drawing Near and the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH wants me to challenge to Fight the 1st Top General.. and WHO WINS will take that Seat.. and I turn to Face YOU.. and my Head looks down to the Ground.. Your Sword Points at me to speak and I would say.. HOW can I fight the Best.. I am truly UNWORTHY to fight the TOP GENERAL.. I have NO training of Wars in combat.. this General wins battles at Wars and has helped this Nation.. I have heard that HE can KILL many armies with the Sword.. and I am Not much of that experienced of wars.. ONLY thing that I am good at right now is Loving YOU as My QUEEN.. the QUEEN of my Heart.. and I see YOU still pointing that sword and Pointing that Sword back to the TOP.. the 1st General.. and I would hear.. the Seven friends of Mine all comes behind Me.. two knees on the ground.. arms stretch forward and Heads looks to the Ground.. Please.. I can't fight the first.. the TOP General.. and I see YOUR sword still Pointing.. and It seems like the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH is Not having it at all.. and I see you stepping down the Steps to the Ground.. and the Sword on my Neck.. and I would say.. if you need to Cut me.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Please do so.. it is better for me to DIE by that sword.. I rather Die by your Sword because the Sword belongs to the ONE WHO I Love the Most.. if YOU would LIKE to end my Life right here.. Please so it Fast and Quick MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would lift UP my head and close Both eyes.. and I wanted to see you strike my down with the edge of the Sword.. I be the Most Happiest to even die by that sword because YOU KNOW that I am dead by the ONE WHO I love the Most.. I would watch the 2nd Top General and He comes behind the Seven friends of mine and two knees to the Ground.. arms stretch forward and Head looking to the ground with the Seven Generals who walks with HIM.. they all goes.. two knees hit the Ground.. arms stretch forwards and Heads all LOOK to the Ground and shouts together.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. SHOW MERCY.. SHOW MERCY ON US.. strike all of US together.. and I am thinking.. what is happening.. and I open both eyes.. and I see YOU back Off and I just can't believe what I am here.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOUR sword is close to My neck.. and It is ready to take my BLOOD.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. please strike Me down Now.. I am ready to Die.. ready to die by your Sword but before YOU strike me with that Sword.. remember HOW MUCH I Love YOU.. I don't care any More.. NOW the 1st general.. the Top best walks UP and He kicks Me on the chest.. without getting the permission from YOU the QUEEN.. and It makes me so Made for NOT HONORING who YOU are.. and HOW rude is that to do it without the CONSENT of the QUEEN.. YOU are Not the Princess any More.. but the One TRUE RULER NOW and I fall on the ground.. and I see YOU angry at the situation.. as I am laying on the Ground.. I would get UP from the GROUND.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. because of WHAT this MAN has done without your WORD.. without your CONSENT.. without your PERMISSION I will take this Challenge.. and I get UP.. Now the Men would make a Big circle around and He walks to the Back where the sparring ground takes Place.. and without.. kicking me in front of YOU when He did Not ask for the Permission when YOU are standing there against my word.. I don't like that at ALL.. so I would walk to the Sparring Ground and the 1st TOP GENERAL stands there with the Sword.. and I am just.. How can he do this when YOU are speaking with me.. and did NOT even ask the permission or have the Word consent and I would pull the Sword Out of the sheath and I would LOOK at this General.. and I see you walking back UP the steps and YOU stand.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I see you POINTING the KING'S sword and YOU swing that sword to Fight.. and I look at Him and I just run UP with the Sword in my Hand.. HOW dare YOU to act rudely in front of the QUEEN.. Our QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Show some respect by Honoring and I would jump UP AND swing the Sword in my hand and the 1st General counter Blocks with his Sword and the Blades hit each Other and my two feet lands on the ground and I swing the Sword side way and Would JUMP UP doing the back Kick and I would kick HIS face with a round HOUSE kick.. the 1st General falls to the ground.. and I turn to LOOK at YOU MY QUEEN.. I will Not lose for YOU.. I know that the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH has chosen this Fight with a Purpose in the Mind.. I know that there is a reason why YOU have chosen us to do this.. BUT I just do Not like to show anything.. But just to remain close to YOU.. to just to Love YOU by your side.. I hate to Fight but if it is needed I MUST defend it for YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. and the 1st General gets UP holding the Sword and HE swings the sword left right left.. right left right at Me as I am going back countering Blocking the Sword.. hearing the Blades Hitting.. IF I lose today My QUEEN.. if I lose I know that I must die.. just the way it Goes But I just can't Die.. I need more years so that I can love you More.. I just got started to Love YOU MORE.. I can't just die like this right.. I need More years to see HOW FAR I can love you so that IT can Out grow from NOW.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN and I would grab the Sword Tight and I would Jump UP forward and I would start to swing back at the 1st TOP General.. and the Blades Keeps ON hitting each Other.. and I would side KICK and then move forward with the Back KICK and able to HIT him in the chest.. and I would Jump UP and do the SIDE kick and strike him on the chest again.. at least One thing that I have fully grown to Do in my Heart.. TO LOVE you when YOU were the Little princess.. I started to Love you since you were so YOUNG.. and I always dreamed of Keep on loving YOU till the End.. Now YOU are my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. my QUEEN and I still Love you as strong as I did when I was YOUNG.. this never changed.. My Heart of loving YOU have always remained faithful because NOW I KNOW how much I love you.. the 1st General looks at me.. hearing me speaking as I would

MAH MAH.. Turn too LOOK at YOU.. he just freezes watching me.. and knowing that I have loved YOU for such a Long time and I turn my Head to face Him and I would look at the 1st General.. the TOP Warrior and I would say.. if you know what a Love Is.. it does NOT matter How many people YOU have killed on the battle field if YOU do NOT even know what it means to Love a WOMAN.. it does NOT matter if it is the QUEEN.. I know that I must be punished.. and I will die for the crimes.. if the Law says I can't Love the QUEEN and I am going against the law.. I will stand in the court and will be trialed for the case.. If I should be charged to Die.. I am ready to DIE for the Heart of My QUEEN.. if I am a dead Man walking.. at least I had the once in a Life to LOVE.. to LOVE YOU my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. if people in the court wants to punish me and this is a Crime to Love YOU.. I am standing and I know I am ready.. I have take so Many years to Love YOU.. and if I die today.. Please Bury Me with my parents.. and I would look at the 1st General and I would run UP and I jump UP and swing the Sword at HIM the Swords HITS.. the blades Hits and His sword falls to the Ground.. and the 1st General.. his two knees goes down and I put the sword on his Neck.. and I can hear the cheers of the Military troops shouting Out and I turn my Head to look at YOU.. and I see that YOU have pointed your Sword NOT TO KILL him.. your head telling me NOT TO strike Him and I raise UP the sword into the Air.. and I would shout.. and I turn around.. TWO KNEES hit the ground.. dropping the sword to the ground.. my arms stretch forward and Head looks to the ground.. and I am crying.. because YOU are standing there.. the Messenger behind is promoting me to be the 1st top General.. and I am just weeping and mourning in Joy.. and I see your Sword.. pointing at me.. and knowing that you want me to speak.. But my Words.. it is because the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH believes in me.. it is because YOU have given me a chance.. how can I come this Far.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. YOU even gave me this Permission to speak and to tell YOU about what it means to Love YOU.. even this is the Once in a LIFE time chance you give me.. I am suppose to be punished.. either be stoned to death.. die by the sword or hanged by the ropes.. YOU gave me the chance to share HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.. I can be arrested and be thrown into prison and also it can be a treason for the Nation.. and I know that without Your consent.. without YOUR PERMISSION.. how can I dare to open my Heart to share this Heart of MINE to YOU.. I know that if the law stated.. a LOW BORN like myself cannot LOOK at the ROYAL BLOOD LINE because it means treason.. I am a traitor of because I was born from the Lowest Class.. I am the son of a SLAVE MAN.. BUT to give me a Chance to walk into the training Ground.. and I had NO learning.. but only skills I was given was from the Old Man.. the teacher and also from my Father.. who gave me what they know but Nothing More.. when YOU LOOK at the birth right.. I am NOT suppose to be here.. and It is because when YOU saw me.. with the Official seal.. you could of still reject me because of the back ground of where I came From.. many Noble YOUNG MEN were only allowed to come into the training Camp and the ground into the Royal Palace.. LOOK at the chances of How much the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH gave me.. even this was a Once in a life time.. without your Permission.. without your consent of the Word How can I even challenge the 1st Top General.. it is IMPOSSIBLE.. but YOU have allowed and granted a WISH but I am NOT even allowed to be here.. NOT even as a PALACE GUARD.. I cried and Cried when YOU looked at the Official seal and YOU LOOKED at me and gave me the Permission to come into the Training ground.. when I saw YOU and How you looked at the Guard who was by the back gates which IT lead to the training ground.. I just could NOT believe because I was waiting for many days.. MANY people had to go home and were NOT ALLOWED.. but when YOU saw me.. YOU looked at me and told me I can come IN.. I cried that NIGHT.. because I needed only ONE CHANCE.. just a ONE SHOT and started to Love YOU because why would you even care about this Low Born.. a SON who was born to a SLAVE MAN.. why would you even give me this kind of chance.. and I would cry looking UP at the MOON.. that just for this ONE CHANCE in a LIFE TIME.. I will never disappoint YOU but show YOU what a REAL MAN.. who is from the most lowest Place can DO.. NOW.. YOU are the QUEEN of the Nation.. in the highest position taking on the highest chair.. and MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. YOU have given me the chance to fight.. just to raise me UP to the 1st TOP general.. and I would be looking at the Ground with my tears falling down.. giving me dreams to dream BIG.. How can a MAN dream like this without YOU giving me this kind of permission.. this kind of chance to be here.. MAH MAH.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MY QUEEN.. I wanted to thank YOU so Much for believing in Me.. Not just the miracle of life.. but even How much I love YOU.. I never stopped dreaming but kept on dreaming that Dreams can come true as long as YOU love.. I have never stopped loving YOU still.. this is the main reason why I am so driven and so determine.. so that YOU can see the Heart of MINE that I still LOVE YOU.. that watching YOU taking your Father's Place.. which HE once ruled as the KING.. NOW you are ruling in his Place as the HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would see the Seven friends of MINE.. they come behind me.. two knees goes to the FLOOR.. arms stretch forward and HEADS all look at the Floor.. the 2nd Top General and even the 1st top General with their generals all.. two knees Hit the floor.. arms all stretch forwards and Heads all look on the ground and tears of these Men weeping before YOU showing HOW much YOU mean to Us.. as the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH MANSAE!! and My hand grabs the Sword and I raise it UP to the Air and SHOUT LOUD and Clear.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MANSAE!! the voices of the Men behind me all raises UP.. HOORAY to My QUEEN.. MANSAE TO HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. HOORAY TO MY QUEEN.. YOU are the true QUEEN of MY HEART and shouts so LOUD it shakes the ground together.. MANSAE to my QUEEN.. HOORAY TO HWANG WOO MAH MAH and we all cry together in tears.. as I would look at YOU sitting on the THRONE.. the King's Chair as YOU raise UP the King's Sword in the Air and tears falls the eyes and tears falls from the sky.. IT IS raining in joy in tears because YOU are the ONE TRUE QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH..I am thinking about the Meeting Board.. and watching the Moon that has come UP before me.. the Black smiths are all Hitting the swords with a Stone Hammer and I am waiting for My sword to be more sharpen and More stronger.. as the Master of the Black Smith is inside the place where He is at work.. and with the Seven Friends of Mine standing at the back of the training Ground.. waiting for the Swords.. and the 2nd Top rank General with the seven Generals are all with Me as they are too waiting for their Swords as many Black Smiths are using the Stone Hammers.. I can hear the hammers hitting Hard on the Blades of the swords as I am waiting for the Next Great War that is coming.. as I cannot believe that the 2nd top rank General has joined me as friends.. I have turned to LOOK up at the Moon and I am thinking of YOU.. the Queen.. who has approved the United Hands to work together.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. you know that It has been since Long.. I have been loving YOU.. and as I am Looking UP at the Moon.. I just can't stop with a big Smile.. and I would think Back.. when I saw YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. My Father would be pulling the horse.. and I would be sitting on the TOP of the Horse.. Looking at the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would be begging my Father.. Just to take me Once to see YOU.. and I would be looking at the Art Sketch paper.. my arms around the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I would Not eat.. I would Not sleep.. but in the Little ROOM.. after the Garden was restored and was Build UP.. My Father would take a LOOK at me.. finally I would collapse and Fell into a Deep Sleep.. and I did Not wake UP for three days and slept.. I remember my Father would be by my side.. he knew if He did Not take me to see YOU.. I might end UP dead Like my Mother.. when I woke UP finally.. my Father in tears looks at Me.. almost lost me there.. and told me that He was going to see YOU.. I just could not stop.. but My Heart kept on beating Louder and Louder as I grew to Love YOU.. Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I don't know why but I just can't stop.. my Heart just can't stop Loving YOU.. Please tell me why.. what have you done to Me.. to My Heart.. and My Father.. with the Horse.. He carried Me and Put on the Back of the Horse.. I am thinking.. am I dreaming.. please don't wake Me UP.. if I am dreaming.. if I shall Never wake UP in the Dream.. Please.. I just don't want to get UP.. as My Father would be pulling on the ropes of the Horse and I am sitting on the TOP of the Horse.. I remember my Father asking me.. WHY do I love the QUEEN so Much.. WHY do I love HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. what Makes you so Special that even I could Not eat for many days.. and even went into a deep coma for few days and been begging my Father for a long time that I must go to see YOU.. and what if I get caught by the Law.. which a servant Boy cannot Love

MAH MAH.. Royal BLOOD LINE.. that I can be put into death.. it can cost my own Life.. isn't my Life more precious than to Love and I would be sitting on the Top of the Horse as my Father would be asking me these things.. I would say.. I only live Once.. and I will just die if it means to Die.. but to Love is just Once in a Life time.. I can't just love anyone.. must be because I know that I have a BIG HEART.. even though I may be so small.. may be nothing.. has NO NAME.. be a slave Boy.. to LOVE is to love the QUEEN.. if my Heart can only love the QUEEN and NO ONE else and even it means my Life is on the Line.. I don't care what happens to Me.. even I went into Coma.. and does Not that tell YOU enough.. that I can only Love Once and when I love.. I want to love so Big that It be impossible and for Other MEN to say.. that is HOW a Real MAN should Love.. to Love His ONE TRUE QUEEN.. and My Father stops.. and He turns to LOOK back at me.. and he smiles.. but pauses because my Grandfather was close to the King.. which is Your Father.. PEH HA who just passed away.. Must mean something there.. He was the TOP COMMANDER.. to the Highest.. the Chief Commander He was is what my Father would say.. Must be something that I am connected to HIM because My Father never dreamed anything but just to be a Head of the servant.. and I am nothing like my Father.. I want to love My QUEEN.. I want to love my HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and when I put my mind and Heart into something that means something Real and BIG.. I will Never give UP.. until my QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH sees me and believes that I may be so small what Others may be thinking.. but My Heart.. my Dreams and VISIONS are much more greater and in a SUCH HIGHER PLACE.. and My Father looks at me.. and asks.. what if I die because of this.. am I not afraid.. am I not scared and I would tell him.. if I was afraid or too scared.. I would never tried it in the first Place.. I would of never started something that I just could not finished.. I believe in Love.. and My Heart is very BIG even though I am a small person.. I am so small but my Heart and my Vision.. my Dreams of.. I will never stop until I know that my QUEEN.. which is YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH knows it the best in your Heart.. I don't care what anyone says.. but It has never stopped me to come this very far and still I have so much more to go.. and my Father laughs Out Loud and He pulls on the strings of the Horse and He begins to walk as he pulls the strings of the Horse. I am siting on the Back of the Horse.. Looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I see the MOON appear before me.. I see the twinkles of the stars across the Sky and I am smiling as I am looking at the Art sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU and I would say.. MY QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I am coming to YOU.. I will see you soon.. it takes few days to arrive to the Palace and My Father shows the Card that HE is the Head of the Servant.. the Guards by the gate opens.. and He walks while pulling on the Strings of the Horse and He goes to the training Ground.. I am looking from a distance.. and I see you standing there.. the Chief Generals with the Commanders.. even the Chief Commander is there watching YOU Practice.. I am seeing YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. as my Father keeps on walking ahead pulling on the strings of the Horse and gets closer and closer.. and He stops.. bows HIS Head to you.. and I see you Looking UP.. I am sitting on the top of the Horse.. in my hands is the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. when I see YOU holding the Bow.. in one hand.. the Other is the Arrow.. My Heart.. WHY does it keep on beating.. My Heart.. looking at you closer.. I can't believe that I am seeing YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. it has been a long time.. after YOU came to rebuild the garden.. few months has gone by.. maybe it could been years.. I really missed YOU.. I wish that I could tell YOU this.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. that I could not sleep for days.. I started Not to eat.. missing YOU has been so Hard lately.. and I remember one early Morning.. after I would beg my father.. asking him to take me to YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and my father would Not listen.. telling me NO.. that I should never Love YOU.. I just could not handle this Pain of missing YOU.. I started to starve myself to death.. maybe when I am dead and gone.. he can finally see how much I loved YOU.. anyways I just could Not live with this Pain of keep on missing YOU.. my Heart kept on aching and breaking.. I would sit in the Little ROOM.. I even asked my Father again because I wanted to say something to My QUEEN.. to my HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I had NO little ROOM.. I had No shelter to put over my Head.. I had to sleep outside or at the friend's house.. felt like a Homeless Poor Boy.. but now I had a Little ROOM that I can put my Head over.. can sleep.. and I would hear my father telling me NO NO NO.. it is just too dangerous for me to get close to YOU.. and he did not want to see his son dying before his eyes but I am already dying.. I feel like I am going to die if I don't see YOU HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. and One early Morning.. I would had two full buckets of water walking back to the Home.. and I fell on the ground.. some one saw me laying on the road and knew who I was.. knew my father and called him to get me.. the doctor looks at me while I was in the coma.. because I did Not sleep for days and did not bother to eat for few days either.. I just did Not want to live any more.. missing YOU drives me crazy.. it really kills me instead and the doctor asks my father.. do I love any one.. because the doctor knew the cause of this Pain.. this suffering came because my Heart was aching inside.. of course my father did Not say WHO I loved or was loving.. but knew this is because of YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. My QUEEN.. it is because I never stopped loving YOU since the day I first saw YOU.. ever since I met you at the Garden.. and How you came to visit and you heard about this Garden.. the first time I saw YOU.. you were sitting On the TOP of the Horse.. but had a large gathering of people surrounded you.. I came here sitting on the Top of the Horse.. only One person who brought me over is my Father.. who serves YOU as the Head servant.. I know that I have put my father through many pains.. but I am suffering too.. for loving YOU I had to cross many rivers.. looking at many oceans.. through the travel of the feet.. even getting this Horse Back ride.. but My father knows now that I love you just too much that he does Not want me to give UP.. my father told me when the doctor came to see me.. He told me because my Heart was suffering.. in so much pain of missing YOU.. as I would look at you holding the Bow in your hand.. the Other is the arrow.. and YOU.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH would turn the head looking at the Target.. I don't know why I am here.. but I wanted to see YOU.. I missed YOU so Much my QUEEN.. it took many many days to come here.. and did Not eat much coming.. putting my father through so much pain.. of course I feel so bad but.. I knew If I can't see YOU.. I rather die.. I made that choice to die.. when My Father said NO.. and kept on telling me NO.. I could Not see YOU.. My QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I can't see YOU.. I made a CHOICE that I am going to end my Life.. I just could not eat.. I would be looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. I could not sleep.. this pain inside.. this Pain in my Heart.. this Ache kept on coming UP to me because I wanted to see YOU.. I wanted to get close to YOU but How.. I knew if I only begged.. my father would say No.. if I die.. then He will know that I love YOU.. that is when I knew.. I really loved YOU this much that NOW I am here on the back of this HORSE with him.. as I would watch YOU looking at the Target on the training Ground.. it was at the back of it.. the Black smiths are behind the generals and commanders.. behind the Chief Commander.. and I am looking at YOU.. as YOU would PULL back the strings of the Bow with the back of the arrow and YOU would aim and hand releases.. I see the arrow goes fly and It hits right on the Red Dot.. the Guard by the Target stands and waves the White Flag.. shouting Out BULLS EYE.. and I would look at YOU.. even though YOU are my QUEEN.. you are also trained to be a fighter.. I would hear the Chief Commander shouting Out Loud and Clear.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to my QUEEN.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. all of the military soldiers would shout Out.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to the QUEEN.. MANSAE to HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOU are wondering why do I love YOU so Much.. it has nothing to do with Me.. but it is because YOU are my True QUEEN.. because I know that YOU are the real HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and there is NO ONE who can take your place in my Heart but YOU.. I knew when I first saw YOU.. it came out of you being a real Princess.. CONG JU NIM.. and How you flourish to become the CROWN PRINCESS.. then when I saw the poor People.. people from the Garden who came.. from far distances.. long distances they have traveled to the Palace.. just to see you and always came before the King.. PEH HA.. asking Your Father for YOU to be the Next Ruler in Line.. they have come from such a far long place.. just to talk to the King.. that the People.. they wanted YOU to take HIS PLACE as the RULER.. when I saw That.. before even this would ever happened.. I knew when you came to the Garden and to rebuild the Garden into New Homes for the People.. I wanted to join and be a Part of.. serving and protecting the Nation YOU are going to build for the future.. I knew YOU were chosen to be the QUEEN.. MY HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. the real

MAH MAH.. TRUE QUEEN..I am looking at the Sun rising.. and I am standing next to YOU.. MAH MAH.. why are you crying.. and I am looking at you holding the Bow and the Arrows as you are pulling out to Shoot and YOU stop.. dropping the arrows on the ground.. I have never seen you in tears.. what is Matter with YOU MAH MAH.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and I am watching the New Recruits Men coming Out of the tents.. My Heart is breaking as I am watching you In full of tears.. and I hear.. the Queen.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. Your Mother is walking.. the servants and the Maid servants.. the men Servants who are attending her are all coming.. and the Queen drops on the ground.. and has a Letter in the hand.. and as I am looking.. this must be very serious case.. I feel like there is a great change about to come its place.. I had the Dream last Night about.. and when I look at your Mother the Queen.. and I see you just crying.. and I see you telling me to get the Letter in your Mother's Hand.. so I go over.. and grab the Letter out of her Hand.. the Six Princes also are coming with the Prime Minister.. the 12 Noble men comes.. and in my hand is the Letter and I would Unfold.. I would be reading this Letter and I am Not sure why I have to read this.. I am Not even the Messenger for the KING.. PEH HA.. but YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS is telling me that I could.. I just can't believe it.. Your Father.. His Official stamp Seal.. is giving UP his Position to Rule.. the King.. PEH HA does Not want to rule any More and has passed the Seat and as I am reading it a loud where all the Great Powerful Men and Leaders.. the Official has gathered before Me.. and I am also watching the Poor People.. the Ones WHO all came from the Garden.. mostly Homeless people.. and they are all standing hearing the Letter as I am reading before you.. I would fall on my two Knees.. and it states that the King is passing his throne to YOU.. the CROWN PRINCESS shall NOT be PRINCESS any More but to be CROWNED to be the QUEEN KING.. the Highest seat ever to be taken as the RULER and I would be shouting Out.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would turn to YOU.. and my hands let goes the Letter.. and I am Looking UP.. my two eyes filled with Tears.. just like my Dreams I had last night.. I never knew that It would happen this Fast.. but WHY so fast.. and I would hear.. all of the People great and small.. they all fall on their two knees.. lowering the Bodies to touch to the ground and say.. To the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. YOU are the new RULER for this Nation.. and I am thinking.. what is going to happen to your Mother.. is she Not the QUEEN and I am LOOKING at your Mother.. she also lowers and her head touches to the ground.. But that is YOUR MOTHER.. and I look.. Your MOTHER pulls the crown Off her Head.. the Messenger Comes with the King's Crown and it unites together as ONE BIGGEST crown.. and GOSH.. my Heart just keeps on beating fast.. the Messenger holding the Biggest Crown and He is walking with tears in his Eyes and I am looking.. all the people.. faces to the ground.. and the Seven of my friends comes out of the tent and they are all looking.. the Biggest Crown goes On top of your Head as the QUEEN of the Nation.. and they all fall on two knees.. heads touching the Ground as YOU are Pronounce to be the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH MANSAE.. I would hear the Little Boys.. all raising UP their hands.. Little Girls too.. raising UP their arms and Hands.. MANSAE to the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. and I would hear all of the voices shout OUT.. MANSAE.. HOORAY to the QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. MANSAE.. and all of the heads are touching the Ground.. I am LOOKING at the ground.. Just could not help the celebration.. that You have become the true new RULER.. I have never stopped Loved YOU.. but kept on loving YOU till I get to see this and hear this.. I never imagined even the Poor people WHO I grew UP with me.. they are together all in ONE watching this Happening.. witnessing something that just can't happen but did Happen going down in the History of what it means to become a TRUE RULER.. there is Another Messenger on the TOP of and he blows the trumpet and it is Loud.. I am wondering.. this sound of the trumpet does not sound good.. it means someone in the royal family just died.. and NO.. and every one starts to Cry.. and I am thinking.. is it PEH HA!.. is it your Father the King who just died and the Messenger shouts Out who is on the top of the palace wall.. the KING.. PEH HA just died.. and everyone starts to Mourn as I am hearing this News.. and I see you just crying Loud and loud for Your Father.. and My Heart.. I know what it means to have a Broken Heart.. and I just can't say a word to YOU.. but.. I know that YOUR Father truly loved YOU.. and YOU would cry loud and it grew louder as YOU kept on mourning for me.. it makes me cry more as I am watching YOU cry for your Father.. the King.. but why is my Heart breaking it more.. and I would think about How he promised that the King is going to be fair when He finds the Successor.. Not because He loved YOU more or Less but to rule is the Most difficult seat to be In.. Only the Strongest and the Wisest can take His place and can rule.. giving all of the six Sons too a chance to prove that they can be on the spot.. but.. YOU are the One chosen.. the Little One.. youngest from the men but as the daughter Only.. and I would just mourn because I remember YOU would be sharing about this One point.. I remember when YOU became the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU told me One night about How your Father wanted to give it all fair to His Blood Lines.. but Only ONE can be seated in the Highest seat.. and it is Not that He loved YOU so much.. He saw the People.. He heard about what YOU have done even for the smallest.. the poorest people.. and I know and believe YOUR father believed that the people who was at the garden all came to support YOU.. I remember.. the People from the garden came to me.. and asking me where the King Stayed.. His Chamber.. I would lead the People of the garden to the King's Chamber.. the Servant for the King shares the Message.. and the King.. PEH HA comes and He would be seated on the Outer courts.. I was there.. by the gates just standing to guard the Post.. the Parents of the Children falls on their Knees before the King.. and they shared about what YOU have done when YOU were Young.. the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. How much you cared and shared the Love for the People.. and they would cry before the King.. PEH HA.. to make YOU the RULER.. that they will serve YOU as servants of the QUEEN.. to Make you the Next to RULE and would be begging the KING.. PEH HA.. never letting the King go until your Father the KING made and keep the Promise to make YOU the RULER for this NATION.. as I would watch the People of the Poor crying Out in a Loud voice.. they have come and travelled long ways away from the Garden just to tell this TO your Father.. the King.. that the People of the Garden will give UP their CHILDREN for the King's services.. I saw Little Boys and girls.. and they would come forward and fall before the KING.. PEH HA.. to Let YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH to rule over them.. as I would watch by the gates of the door.. the Little girls and Boys would fall begging and they started to cry.. how the CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH saved their parents Lived when NO ONE else cared if they lived or NOT.. that because of the Parents able to stand and live through it.. NOW they are here.. the Little children has come to help the CROWN PRINCESS and I would stand there crying.. watching.. the Guards had to push the Little Boys trying to go cling to the King's leg.. I just could not believe what I be seeing.. just my Heart.. My Heart as I am beating with my hand.. and I would fall on two knees and I started to cry with the Little CHILDREN.. and I would think about my own situation.. the Chance that the CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH gave me.. I am here Now.. I was at the garden too.. I am looking at the Little children.. they are crying.. heads on the ground to the King because of what YOU have done.. even I was there.. I was there too at the Garden as the Little Boy.. these Parents many that I know has grown UP.. but they too were once like Me little BOYS and Little Girls in the garden and It broke me Down because I was reminded.. It was hard living in the garden as being broke and Poor.. had NO chance.. NO ONE did care about Us.. I started to Hit my Chest as I would cry thinking about what happened to the Garden the day YOU came.. the parents would be in tears as they are watching their children crying before the King.. PEH HA.. I am in the Back.. my Heart.. this Heart thinking about what I saw that day with the Parents when they too was a child.. I saw the King Looking.. YOUR Father was looking at all these People coming from the Garden and together crying Out because of what YOU have done as the Princess.. as the ROYAL BLOOD LINE and I saw Your Father.. the KING.. PEH HA.. his Heart was moved.. was touched by all these people coming together asking for YOU to be the Next Leader.. the QUEEN who can only rule for this Nation.. ONE BOY stands UP before the King.. your Father and tells Your Father that He is going to fight in the war.. even though he was Only a child.. I would watch a Girl stands up saying She will to enter the war to fight for this Nation and I begin to watch all the hands.. with the parents wanting to join in the Battle to fight in the war.. and I just could not believe they are going to give up their own Lived for this Nation.. for this Country.. for YOU HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH

I just can't take my off of the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. Son and Daughter who came into my House.. of course I never thought that I would ever meet your Children.. they are the two most beautiful children.. looking at the Son and looking at the daughter.. both are in the second room where it is suppose to be Only for the Guests to spend the night.. I am looking at the two.. holding hands and both are looking at the Art Sketch paper.. I drew a Picture of YOU looking at a picture that YOU gave me.. I would sit alone in the room.. while the two children were in the Guest room sleeping.. I just couldn't sleep.. I feel like even though YOU are far in a distant.. YOU had to go to a Business meeting and of course it is YOUR work.. as I would peek at the Door.. at the Guest room.. it is the room where the Two baby Teddy Bears would fall asleep.. and I told them both.. that YOU are going to be coming Home very SOON.. MOMMA is coming soon so be a Good Little boy.. Be a Good little Girl because YOUR MOMMA told me that she is going to give you something that YOU will Love forever and will enjoy to keep.. and I saw them Both sleeping.. as I would sit by the Desk.. picking UP an Art pencil and I bought the Art Sketch Book.. your Picture.. I put and it lean on the back of the desk where I can see your Whole Face.. it was a Nice peaceful time I had because I had the time to THINK for myself.. I had the Time to LOOK at your Picture.. which makes me Heart fall even deeper in Love with YOU.. changing the Diapers of the Two baby Teddy Bears.. putting on the T - shirt for the Boy and for the Girl.. your SON and Daughter.. I would have to call YOU which I know you are so Busy working and just the business meetings YOU have to spend for the company is NOT easy for YOU to get calls.. But.. of course YOU are so Kind.. YOU are so gentle with Care because your Children comes first.. I would watch YOU on the Face Time.. and the two baby Teddy bears.. the SON and Daughter.. when the Boy starts to cry for his MOMMA.. for YOU.. I would watch his Sister.. your Daughter starts to cry.. both holding hands and crying Loud for MOMMA.. and wanting to see YOU.. so I would have to pick Up my Phone.. call.. dial your Number just to see if it can reach YOU at this POINT of time.. which I would ask YOU.. your children are crying for YOU.. asking where is MOMMA.. I want to see My MOMMA and the cry grows louder.. My Heart would pound Heart as I would watch the two Holding hands.. sitting next to each Other.. asking for MOMMA.. of course it feels like the first day when they both came into the House.. it was the Most Hardest day I had to go through.. they just did Not stop crying.. I had to put the two BABY TEDDY BEARS.. SON and Daughter.. and they would sit on the couch or can be the sofa.. crying through the Night.. I just could not sleep.. they are so loud but when Both cries together.. I can feel the walls in the House be shaking.. so I had to just sit on the sofa.. if they two were on the couch.. if they both.. SON and Daughter were sitting on the SOFA.. I be sitting on the couch.. just wondering when would they stop crying.. Until I would call YOU.. and when YOU told me that it has to be a Face Time.. the two always wanted to see Your Face.. their MOMMA'S face.. I remember why did I not think of this SOONER.. but of course.. when I find that Out.. and I would walk up to the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son.. he grabs the Phone with two hands.. I see the Daughter his sister next to HIM and wipes the tears off his face.. the care and Love.. which touches my Heart and the Daughter.. I see her hugging her Brother and both cries together in each Other's shoulder asking for MOMMA.. I am thinking.. why do I have to see all these things to HIT my Heart.. feels like someone Hit me hard on my stomach and knock the wind off of Me when I see something like this.. and It was very hard to get through the first day.. I wanted to cry because I just did Not know what to do when the two Baby Teddy Bears feel so Scared.. and feels like they have lost their MOMMA.. just made me realize that I had to do something so that the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter feels more closer to YOU.. that is when I would pick UP the Phone and dial your Number and wait for YOU to pick UP on the Other Line.. and Yes.. right when I needed you the Most.. at the Most Hard moment.. I see you pick Up and asking me that YOU wanted to speak to your Children.. and I do remember YOU told me one thing.. a secret that the Children Loves.. the two baby Teddy Bears are so In to and to get their attention.. to read the two Baby Teddy Bears.. they have favorite BOOK that YOU would always read and start to choose books to read for them.. they.. the two BABY TEDDY BEARS.. the SON and the DAUGHTER.. they both loves to listen to stories.. a children's book is the best choice.. when I look at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the SON and the Daughter.. it seems like they would NOT like to hear or will not want me to read them any Books.. it is just they don't want to listen right.. but.. the right Book stories.. they will.. so I would try to find Books in the House.. wondering.. which BOOK should I read to these two baby Teddy Bears.. what would the SON and the Daughter would enjoy to hear stories.. I know that They are NOT going to like what I like right.. So I would be spending some time on the Internet.. trying to find BOOKS that is very Popular for the children's Book.. and it shows just too many Books.. I would order it online and I would be waiting for the Next day shipping to come.. so that I can start to read Books to these Little Ones.. the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. I would hear the Knock.. and I would Open the Door to find a Box.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has been into the coloring Books.. I would buy crayons and thin books where it is Black and white which the two baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter would love to color on the pages of these thin coloring Book.. I would peek open the Guest Door.. I would see the two Baby Teddy Bears sitting next to each Other.. holding crayons in the hands.. My Heart.. the SON is looking at the Sister.. the daughter.. she has the Little Princess coloring BOOK.. and the SON.. it is Ninja Turtles and transformers which I loved when I was a small Boy.. wondering will this SON.. the baby Boy love this too.. but I am looking at the SON looking at this Sisters colors.. the crayons and coloring over.. copying the same color as his sister.. of course.. I wanted to show this to YOU.. so I would call and dial up your Number.. of course I hope that I am not bothering you at this TIME of the day because it can be your Meeting at work.. and YOU pick UP and I would put on face time.. I would see you through the screen on this Phone.. in my heart.. I am missing YOU.. I am looking at your Children.. and I am watching your Children love colors.. they love to color on the Book on the pages.. and I wanted to show YOU what YOUR SON and your Daughter is doing.. I would give them the same Crayon Box and it has the crayon pencils and chalks.. as I open the guest door wide.. and I walk into the second room and I would sit in the middle of the two baby Teddy Bears.. and I would say to the children.. YOUR MOMMA on the Phone.. the two will stop coloring and turn to LOOK at YOU on the Phone.. the SON.. He grabs the Phone first and LOOKS at YOU.. and the shirt is dirty with colors all over.. and smiles looking at YOU.. I can hear your voice and you are asking your SON.. show MOMMA the Picture you color.. the SON.. the baby Teddy Bear turns to look at the Coloring BOOK on the Floor and picks UP to show YOU the Picture he is coloring.. my tears.. I just can't stop crying because I have never seen this SON being so Happy showing YOU he has an ART.. and the SON gives the Phone which is on FACE TIME to his Sister.. your Daughter.. and YOU say the same thing to your Daughter.. and the color are the Same with her Brother so I would see the Daughter.. the baby Teddy Bear smiles looking at you through the Face time on the Phone and I can hear your voice.. your Brother is copying YOU HUH and I hear both smiling.. and I am just sitting watch the SON.. He smiles real Big.. saying he loves to color and follow his sister.. I put my hand on my chest.. it touches my Heart.. why does it touch my Heart so bad right Now.. and the Daughter looks at Me and gives me the Phone and I am LOOKING at YOU.. and I see you smile real Big.. and I would say to YOU.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has come a long ways.. because.. I see the two baby Teddy Bears.. your SON and Daughter has a change of Heart.. when I came as the stranger who they did not even Know.. the two children would cry because they were afraid.. they were frighten.. they were both.. your Son and your Daughter were scared.. they did Not even look at me.. both holding hands.. and all they did was cry because I was a stranger to them.. I thought for a Long time.. the two Baby Teddy Bears will not accept Me.. I don't think they both.. your SON and Daughter would not give me a chance to get Close and will TEDDY BEARS.. SON and Daughter.. and they would sit on the couch or can be the sofa.. crying through the Night.. I just could not sleep.. they are so loud but when Both cries together.. I can feel the walls in the House be shaking.. so I had to just sit on the sofa.. if they two were on the couch.. if they both.. SON and Daughter were sitting on the SOFA.. I be sitting on the couch.. just wondering when would they stop crying.. Until I would call YOU.. and when YOU told me that it.. Has to be a Face Time.. the two always wanted to see Your Face.. their MOMMA'S face.. I remember why did I not think of this SOONER.. but of course.. when I find that Out.. and

I would walk up to the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son.. he grabs the Phone with two hands.. I see the Daughter his sister next to HIM and wipes the tears off his face.. the care and Love.. which touches my Heart and the Daughter.. I see her hugging her Brother and both cries together in each Other's shoulder asking for MOMMA.. I am thinking.. why do I have to see all these things to HIT my Heart.. feels like someone Hit me hard on my stomach and knock the wind off of Me when I see something like this.. and It was very hard to get through the first day.. I wanted to cry because I just did Not know what to do when the two Baby Teddy Bears feel so Scared.. and feels like they have lost their MOMMA.. just made me realize that I had to do something so that the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter feels more closer to YOU.. that is when I would pick UP the Phone and dial your Number and wait for YOU to pick UP on the Other Line.. and Yes.. right when I needed you the Most.. at the Most Hard moment.. I see you pick Up and asking me that YOU wanted to speak to your Children.. and I do remember YOU told me one thing.. a secret that the Children Loves.. the two baby Teddy Bears are so In to and to get their attention.. to read the two Baby Teddy Bears.. they have favorite BOOK that YOU would always read and start to choose books to read for them.. they.. the two BABY TEDDY BEARS.. the SON and the DAUGHTER.. they both loves to listen to stories.. a children's book is the best choice.. when I look at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the SON and the Daughter.. it seems like they would NOT like to hear or will not want me to read them any Books.. it is just they don't want to listen right.. but.. the right Book stories.. they will.. so I would try to find Books in the House.. wondering.. which BOOK should I read to these two baby Teddy Bears.. what would the SON and the Daughter would enjoy to hear stories.. I know that They are NOT going to like what I like right.. So I would be spending some time on the Internet.. trying to find BOOKS that is very Popular for the children's Book.. and it shows just too many Books.. I would order it online and I would be waiting for the Next day shipping to come.. so that I can start to read Books to these Little Ones.. the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. I would hear the Knock.. and I would Open the Door to find a Box.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has been into the coloring Books.. I would buy crayons and thin books where it is Black and white which the two baby Teddy Bears.. the Son and the Daughter would love to color on the pages of these thin coloring Book.. I would peek open the Guest Door.. I would see the two Baby Teddy Bears sitting next to each Other.. holding crayons in the hands.. My Heart.. the SON is looking at the Sister.. the daughter.. she has the Little Princess coloring BOOK.. and the SON.. it is Ninja Turtles and transformers which I loved when I was a small Boy.. wondering will this SON.. the baby Boy love this too.. but I am looking at the SON looking at this Sisters colors.. the crayons and coloring over.. copying the same color as his sister.. of course.. I wanted to show this to YOU.. so I would call and dial up your Number.. of course I hope that I am not bothering you at this TIME of the day because it can be your Meeting at work.. and YOU pick UP and I would put on face time.. I would see you through the screen on this Phone.. in my heart.. I am missing YOU.. I am looking at your Children.. and I am watching your Children love colors.. they love to color on the Book on the pages.. and I wanted to show YOU what YOUR SON and your Daughter is doing.. I would give them the same Crayon Box and it has the crayon pencils and chalks.. as I open the guest door wide.. and I walk into the second room and I would sit in the middle of the two baby Teddy Bears.. and I would say to the children.. YOUR MOMMA on the Phone.. the two will stop coloring and turn to LOOK at YOU on the Phone.. the SON.. He grabs the Phone first and LOOKS at YOU.. and the shirt is dirty with colors all over.. and smiles looking at YOU.. I can hear your voice and you are asking your SON.. show MOMMA the Picture you color.. the SON.. the baby Teddy Bear turns to look at the Coloring BOOK on the Floor and picks UP to show YOU the Picture he is coloring.. my tears.. I just can't stop crying because I have never seen this SON being so Happy showing YOU he has an ART.. and the SON gives the Phone which is on FACE TIME to his Sister.. your Daughter.. and YOU say the same thing to your Daughter.. and the color are the Same with her Brother so I would see the Daughter.. the baby Teddy Bear smiles looking at you through the Face time on the Phone and I can hear your voice.. your Brother is copying YOU HUH and I hear both smiling.. and I am just sitting watch the SON.. He smiles real Big.. saying he loves to color and follow his sister.. I put my hand on my chest.. it touches my Heart.. why does it touch my Heart so bad right Now.. and the Daughter looks at Me and gives me the Phone and I am LOOKING at YOU.. and I see you smile real Big.. and I would say to YOU.. the Two baby Teddy Bears has come a long ways.. because.. I see the two baby Teddy Bears.. your SON and Daughter has a change of Heart.. when I came as the stranger who they did not even Know.. the two children would cry because they were afraid.. they were frighten.. they were both.. your Son and your Daughter were scared.. they did Not even look at me.. both holding hands.. and all they did was cry because I was a stranger to them.. I thought for a Long time.. the two Baby Teddy Bears will not accept Me.. I don't think they both.. your SON and Daughter would not give me a chance to get Close and will Not open their Hearts to Me at all.. but I remember you are the ONE who told Me.. that the two baby Teddy Bears.. both your SON and your Daughter.. all they needed was some TIME and patient and just give them LOVE.. share kindness and be gentle to them.. the Hearts will open UP as long as I am waiting and being patient but always go to them first.. and Love the two Children.. I would be asking.. what if it takes a Long time but.. your Words reassured me that the Two children.. the SON and the DAUGHTER will open UP.. just give time.. when I heard those words from YOU and How you told Me.. know what the two Children.. your SON and your Daughter Loves.. and I am trying to think.. and YOU told me.. when I look into the bag you brought to Me.. when I search and seek into It.. I will find OUT what they love and enjoy the Most. I remember opening the Bag.. I would find the crayons.. two Boxes and the coloring BOOK.. and I would find even the children's BOOK.. and that is when I started to work with Them.. and I would watch the tears turn into smiles as they would sit into the Guest ROOM.. the minds be so busy coloring.. I remember when the BOOKS of the children came.. I was able to go into the Guest ROOM.. and I would ask the SON and the Daughter.. can I read you a Children's BOOK to YOU.. will you please give me your TIME so that I can share you some stories.. and I was truly amazed how the Two baby Teddy Bears.. the SON and the DAUGHTER both drops what they were doing.. which is coloring on the coloring Books.. and they would sit next to each other holding Hands.. and it was time for the two Baby Teddy Bears to listen to stories and for me to read from the Book.. I would hear the Phone be ringing because it was that time.. the Hour has come and of course.. YOU would also listen to the Book.. the Children's BOOK as I would answer your CALL and put on the Face TIME.. I would be charging the PHONE as I would switch to Face time.. and I would give the Phone on face TIME.. the SON would grab the Phone first looking at you on face time.. and the Daughter sitting next to her Brother and Both are staring on to the screen of the Phone ON face time looking at YOU.. I would open the BOOK.. the children's Book and from the chapter One.. I would read from the first page and I would turn to the next page.. and I can see The two Baby Teddy Bears listening.. and I would hear your voice on the Other line.. asking the two Children about the page I was reading.. to share their thoughts to YOU.. and I would sit there and I would paused.. the SON would Look at you on the Phone confused.. I would hear the daughter able to share her thoughts to YOU looking at you on Daughter I ever seen.. and I saw the smile.. grabbing the SPOON.. putting a RICE and the beef.. the Mouth opens wide and I put the spoon into her mouth.. as I see her chew and eat.. I just could NOT hold my tears in.. I just could Not believe that finally I am able to feed this Little Daughter.. in the hand.. there is a Picture.. I would open her Hand and to look at what Picture and it is a Picture of YOU.. and I would look at YOU through this Picture.. my hand touches My Chest and I would say.. WHY do you Burn my Heart.. WHY do you do this TO ME and even bringing the Twins.. the Little SON and the Little Daughter.. my Heart beat faster as I spend the time with Them.. they are so Adorable and so Cute.. never imagined in my Life that I could even fall more harder for YOU because I feel like I am a part of something Bigger now.. I remember when YOU first called me on the Phone.. and asking ME that YOU had to go somewhere.. and YOU had a problem.. that YOU could Not take your Children with YOU.. and needed them to be place by somewhere safe and secure and wanted to ask me a Favor if I could baby sit your children while YOU are away on this Business journey.. I remember I paused for a few minutes.. trying to think straight because I was Not sure if it was the right THING to bring your Two Children

And YOU told me that they are two.. One is a Boy and the Other is a girl.. and they are Twins.. Little SON and the Little Daughter.. and it is a hard decision for YOU to leave them behind but this trip was very important for YOU.. of course I did Not want to say NO.. I had NO experience of How to deal with kids.. I never had any children on my own so I am Not sure what I am suppose to DO.. but.. of course I know that THIS IS a very Important business meeting.. this trip YOU must take and YOU MUST go so I told YOU.. Yes.. it is because I love YOU.. it is because It is YOU and as long as it is YOU WHO I LOVE the Most.. it does Not matter.. because I will try to be a GOOD baby sitter.. I remember when the DOOR knocked on the Front Door.. did Not expected much.. opening the DOOR.. I saw the Two crying.. I was Not sure.. How am I suppose to handle both be crying.. holding unto MOMMA.. and when YOU try to bring the LITTLE SON closer.. and He was in your Arm and the Little Daughter.. You were holding her hands.. and I saw your steps closer asking me to hold and Carry the Little SON.. he started to Cry Louder as He came into my Arms.. and the Little Daughter started to cry louder and sat on the Floor.. did Not want to come into the House.. and as I would look at this.. My Heart started to feel cracking inside.. started to feel this breaking deep within me.. WHY.. they do not understand why YOU have to leave them with Me.. and when I went inside the House holding the Baby Teddy Bear.. the Little SON.. He is looking at YOU from the back.. arms stretching to YOU.. and Made me stop.. My Heart just could Not handle this pain of hearing this ONE cry and asking for YOU.. asking for His MOMMA and WHY you had to leave HIM with me.. and I would stand still thinking.. what am I suppose to do if they keep on crying.. asking for YOU.. and what do I do when they keep crying over and over.. and I turn around to ask YOU this Question.. I see you walk into this House.. YOU were holding the Other Little BABY Teddy Bear.. the Little Daughter.. and YOU went over to the Couch and Put the Little Daughter to sit still and I would come over to Place and sit the Little SON next to her.. both crying.. and hands be rubbing the eyes looking at YOU and Looking at me.. and I would say.. and YOU would give a Phone to the Little Daughter.. and Placing the Hand of the Little SON.. telling the Two YOU be coming Home soon.. and that I am a BABY Sitter for few days so Don't cry.. and I see the two Stop crying when YOU tell them that.. and I see YOU with Your Other Phone and YOU dial the Number.. and the Phone would ring.. the Little Daughter looks at the Phone.. the Little SON looks at the Phone and presses.. and It is the Face Time.. and the two looks at the Face Time.. I see YOU walking back.. and YOU are talking to the two Little BABY TEDDY BEARS and I would watch them smile.. hands be waving looking at YOU through the Phone and giving them two Pictures.. One for the Little SON and the Other for the Little Daughter.. so that YOU are near and YOU gave me One too.. and as I would look at YOU.. I would watch YOU say good bye and Left the Front Door.. I remember the first Night.. I just could Not sleep at all.. and the two Would Not sleep either.. both sitting on the Couch and would be crying.. asking for YOU.. for MOMMA.. of course every one Hour I would hear the Phone ringing and the Two siting next to each Other.. they would fight for the Phone.. pushing the Button for the Face TIME.. I see them showing Teeth and growling that One of them has to talk and the Other.. as I would watch still on the corner.. I did Not want to bother any of them because of how the two.. the Little BABY TEDDY bears kept on crying crying after YOU would hang UP the Phone.. pushing and shoving who is going to answer next.. after a long period of time crying.. I would hear silence.. and when I look at the Couch.. the two be sleeping next to each other.. and I would walk into the ROOM.. and the Picture YOU gave me.. I would go over to the desk and sit alone.. looking at your Picture.. I would be thinking.. they been crying all through the day after you left.. and the two do Not want to eat either.. they do NOT want to drink any waters.. sits on that couch.. LOOKS at your Pictures crying and looks at the Phone to see it rings.. and I am looking at your Picture.. but YOU are so Beautiful.. why did YOU have to bring those two into my House and I know that I have NO experience with children.. what if they keep on crying asking for YOU.. I hear where is MOMMA.. why isn't MOMMA calling the Phone.. and Keeps on crying for YOU.. and Now there is Peace and silence as I am sitting in this ROOM alone.. of course if the Two Little Ones are crying Out for YOU.. asking and missing YOU.. I know that my Heart truly feels the same.. that I do want to see YOU SOON too and that I know what the two Little TEDDY BEARS are feeling.. that they want to see YOU SOON.. how about me.. How about My Heart.. what would you do if I cry like the two Little Ones.. the Teddy Bears missing their MOMMA.. what would you do if I showed you my tears and telling you that my Heart is being shattered.. it is this Pain.. this sharp pain I feel inside because I miss YOU.. that I want to be near YOU and to tell YOU how much I love YOU.. would you let me show YOU my Tears because what My Heart truly feels for YOU.. that I want to say I love YOU.. why can't I say it to YOU and tell you how much I do.. I want to tell YOU to let YOU know to say it and to say I love you hurts me the Most because that is when I misses YOU the Most.. I wish that YOU knew.. I wish that YOU know right Now.. the Two baby Teddy bears are sleeping right Now which NOW I am able to speak to YOU.. but I know that Heart.. I know this Heart.. I know How it feels to be broken and missing.. wanting to see YOU over and over again.. this Cry.. it cries and cries.. My Heart cries OUT loud the way the two Baby Teddy Bears be crying Out.. wiping the Tears.. grabbing unto the Phone.. pushing each Other for the Next to LOOK at YOU.. saying It is Mine turn to see.. and cries after the Hanging UP on the Phone and looking at YOU.. LOOKING at your Picture crying of these sorrows in the Hearts.. I would watch the Two Little BABY Teddy bears.. sitting on that Couch.. I know that Heart.. I can feel that Pain in the Heart because that is HOW I feel to when YOU are Gone.. when YOU are far away which leaves me to be more lonely than ever.. just to be with YOU.. just to tell YOU.. but my Words can't say it.. I see the two., saying I MISS YOU.. and I love YOU.. LOOKING at you when the Two looks at YOU through the Face Time.. but I stand still.. it kills me the Most.. it eats me at it inside because I wish that I can be like the two TEDDY BEARS.. your Children who is able to say it and tell It the way it just feels inside but I just cannot.. and I would watch them cry.. I cry with the Two watching on the SIDELINE because.. I want to go over to the Phone.. looking at you on the Face TIME and when I look at you through the PHONE on FACE TIME.. just to tell YOU with my tears in my eyes to say it with Means.. I miss YOU and I love YOU.. why can't you be here so that I don't needs to cry any more and watch the Children to cry along with me.. it burns My Heart into pieces.. it burns because it hurts so much.. this PAIN of loving YOU.. I may become sick.. sick inside because I am Loving you just too much just for too long.. that IS how much I love YOU..I am sitting on the Couch.. on my Lap is the Little Son.. the Baby Teddy Bear.. Next to me sitting is the Other baby Teddy Bear.. the Daughter.. I am smiling.. looking at the Picture.. and on my Lap.. the Little Son.. the baby Teddy Bear is looking at YOU.. and I am missing YOU.. asking when YOU are coming.. I want to show you the Two Little Ones.. the children are.. YOU to me.. and tells me I love YOU.. and I miss MOMMA.. I am sitting on the couch.. they are expressing what I am feeling all of the Time.. I know that I can truly relate but the problem is there is Nothing I can do.. what am I suppose to say when YOU Miss.. and has NO answers to what I am feeling because I know How it is hurting me More.. I feel like for myself.. but when YOU can the children involve.. I feel like I am taking more loads on my Heart.. why can't you come Home.. why cant you come sooner.. the two are always missing YOU.. asking me where are YOU.. and they sit on the floor.. LOOKING at the front Door.. and I know if I try to pick the two UP.. One will cry because.. and I have to hear the other One cry too.. and it can get to YOU sometimes.. I wish I can find a way that NO ONE gets hurt and I just don't have to be hearing more cries.. as I walk out of the room.. I would watch the two Baby Teddy Bears falls asleep.. I had to give the two a Bath.. putting the Bubbles into the bath tub.. the two enjoyed taking a Bath in the bubble.. I had to put them into the Crib because It was the bed Time.. I grab a Book and started to read them and I saw the two baby Teddy Bears.. the Little SON and the Daughter.. they both started to sleep while I was reading a children's book.. as I watch the two sleeping.. I would smile looking at the two children.. they are so Beautiful.. of course they are Your Babies so it makes it more beautiful for me to see.. as I would walk out of the room.. I go into my room and sit on the chair.. with the desk.. I am looking at Your Picture.. and it is the Picture of YOU and the two Baby Teddy Bears.. the Little SON sitting on your Lap.. and the Daughter.. she is sitting on the couch next to YOU.. with a Yellow Bow on top of the Head.. My Heart moves.. LOOKING at this picture.. My Heart screams from the Inside.. and

I have bought an Art.. the GIANT SKETCH BOOK.. and I would sit.. wanting to draw the Picture of YOU.. with the two Children.. am I loving YOU more.. I can't stop looking at Your Picture.. with the two children.. the Little SON and the Daughter.. why did you have to come and introduce me to the two.. when ever I look at the two.. I am only seeing YOU more but my Heart just loves YOU more.. when the two sits next with me.. and I watch them smile.. it kills me inside because they make me smile.. my heart lights UP on fire when I see the two.. I am holding the hands of the Little SON.. I try to get him to walk.. but He sits and cries instead.. trying to teach the BABY TEDDY BEAR.. the Little SON to walk.. I remember I called YOU on the Phone.. and I wanted to face time.. and I saw YOU on the Phone.. with my two hands.. I held the two hands of the Little SON.. the Baby Teddy Bear.. trying to get two legs to get UP.. and through the Face time YOU saw your SON.. and he falls and starts to cry.. and the Daughter starts to cry with her Brother.. and I had to let you go on the Face time.. and I am sitting on the chair.. looking at the Picture and thinking of these little flashbacks.. and I grab the Pencil.. which it is use to draw.. but I just could not draw.. I know that YOU be coming soon.. when YOU come.. I know the two Little Ones.. the Two Baby Teddy Bears are going to go with you.. that Means.. it is going to break my Heart.. not just going to be missing YOU but also the two Little ones you brought.. I know that I needs to do this.. so I would look at the Picture of YOU.. Looking at the Little SON sitting on top of Your lap and LOOKING at the Daughter who is sitting next to YOU.. OH MY HEART.. these precious Little Ones.. MY Heart.. what are you doing to this Heart of Mine.. why did YOU have to bring them to Me.. so that YOU can Punish me for doing you a good thing.. but Look what is going to happen to My Heart.. and I grab the Pencil.. the Art pencil and starts to draw on the Piece of Ark sketch Paper.. what if I just can't finish because of My Heart.. LOOK at the Precious Little Ones.. the Little SON.. and the Daughter.. and I would think about.. Holding the Book.. and I am sitting on the floor.. the Two baby Teddy Bears.. the brother and sister.. the children.. they are holding hands and I am reading the children story.. and I be reading Out loud so the two can hear the stories.. and I asked the two.. the Little SON and the Daughter.. do YOU like stories.. and I see the heads goes UP and down telling me Yes.. they love stories.. and I would say to the two children.. I love stories too.. and I would hear the Phone ring.. and On face time it is YOU who was calling.. at this Hour.. before going to Bed.. YOU would tell me that the two Needs to be read.. that I needs to pick a children's book and starts to read or they will Not go to sleep.. so I would look at the Phone.. and I would see YOU.. and the two baby Teddy Bears.. they know it is MOMMA on the Other side.. and I would give the Daughter the Phone.. and I see her looking at YOU and with a Big SMILE.. waving hand at YOU.. and I would open the Book.. and I would start to read the sentences.. paragraphs it becomes.. and I can hear YOU on the Phone telling the Two LITTLE ONES.. and the Daughter would hand to the LITTLE SON.. and Looks at YOU.. Looking at MOMMA.. and I can hear YOU on the Other side asking the two Children.. what is the story about and to explain to YOU.. as I would read and Pause.. I hear answers coming out trying to answer the questions.. and I sit still.. the two Baby Teddy Bears.. both looking at YOU through the Face TIME of the Phone.. trying to tell YOU the answers.. Fussing and bumping into each other.. of course.. after a time.. I would watch the two Letting YOU go on the Other side.. and I would look at the two Little Ones looking at me.. and I would continue to read the Children's Book.. open my mouth loud and clear.. and I would watch the two.. the eyes would get heavy and both sleeps on the Floor.. One at a time.. I would pick UP.. with the Daughter first.. putting Her into her crib and then I would go and pick UP the Little SON.. which I would stand still.. Holding Him in my arms like he is my SON.. and I would slowly put him into his crib.. and turning Off the Light.. I would leave the room.. I am sitting in my room.. just thinking about the day.. I would love to draw the sketch.. but I know that I am not that good in drawing at all.. I am truly terrible at it.. I am not sure why I grab me the Art Pencil when I know that I just can't finish it.. but deep in my heart.. I do want to draw YOU.. and looking at the Picture.. the two Baby Teddy Bears.. Not just YOU but with the two children on the Picture.. but My Heart just won't let me do it.. because I know it will shatter inside because I love YOU.. My Heart will shatter into pieces because I know that the two will be leaving soon.. of course I wish that the two Little Children can stay more longer.. but the More longer they are with me.. More I feel like it is Hurting me instead.. what if I would say to YOU.. don't let the children leave me.. I would be crazy before Your Eyes and I know that they belong.. they came with YOU and that is why I know they must go with YOU.. My Heart just can't accept that the two Baby Teddy Bears be leaving me soon.. and it is hurting me right Now because I know this.. of course they must go with YOU.. as I sit still in the silent.. I receive a Message from YOU.. and YOU have sent me something.. it is a New Picture of YOU.. and YOU are showing me.. telling me where YOU are.. and as I would look on the Phone to take a look at the New Picture of YOU.. and I know that the Children.. the two Baby Teddy Bears will love this Picture of YOU.. of their MOMMA.. which YOU are smiling in this One.. that YOU are doing so GOOD.. this is what I wanted to see.. what I wanted to hear.. and I hear the phone ringing.. and I picked UP the Phone to hear Your Voice.. and I would tell YOU.. after the face time.. I know that the children.. the two Baby TEDDY BEARS would be arguing and they would fuss at each other because they wanted to give YOU the answers.. and Yes.. I had to let YOU go to get this issue solved.. did I finish reading the children's BOOK.. while I was reading the stories to them.. I saw the eyes.. the Daughter first.. the eyes grew tired and I saw the two eyes would close and She lay on the floor sleeping.. I would keep on reading the Children's book and I would look at the eyes of the Little SON.. which he grew tired too.. both eyes started to close and He lays on the floor sleeping next to his sister.. I would keep on reading for at least 30 more minutes.. as I close the Children's Book.. I would pick UP the Daughter first and Put her in the Crib.. and I would go over to the Little SON and Pick Him up next.. Putting HIM into his crib.. and I stood watching the two sleeping.. holding the Daughter.. the BABY TEDDY BEAR in my arms.. I hear I miss MOMMA.. as I would walk out of the room where the two are sleeping.. I would be thinking of YOU and I go into my room.. sitting on the chair next to the desk.. I would LOOK at the Picture of YOU with the two Little ONES.. BABY TEDDY BEARS.. the Daughter and the Little Son.. the Little SON sitting on your Lap and the Daughter sitting next to YOU with the Little Yellow Bow on top of I am just.. my Heart.. My Chest.. My Heart.. How much these two are missing their MOMMA.. wanting to see.. I see both ears.. trying to listen to the Voice of their MOMMA.. and I would look at the two.. they are so Beautiful.. both.. the twins.. the Baby Teddy Bears.. both so Cute but so Beautiful.. I would turn around.. and I do remember.. I was sitting down on the chair.. by the desk.. Looking at your Picture.. I would look and say to Your Picture.. when can I see YOU.. will you let me hold YOU.. will you let me love YOU.. I know I can love you the way YOU want to be held and want to be loved.. I know that I can love you in a way you would never felt before.. I can tell YOU.. tell YOU how much I miss YOU.. How Much I love YOU.. but.. YOU have to give me the permission.. allow me to tell YOU that I love YOU.. and I would be looking at your Picture.. when will you come around so that I can see YOU.. My hand grabbing unto the Pencil.. looking at a sketch of paper.. My hand starts to trace.. using the pencil to draw.. and I am looking at your picture.. to draw you on this sketch paper.. and right when I was about to go deeper.. I hear a knock on the door.. DOK DOK DOK.. and I am wondering.. who be knocking at the front door at this time of hour.. it is getting late.. and I am thinking.. maybe I am just too tired that I am hearing things.. so I would begin to use my hand to draw.. I hear another Knocking at the Door.. DOK DOK DOK.. and I know this time I heard it right.. so I put the Pencil down.. on top of the Desk and I get UP.. pull out of the chair and I would walk to the front door.. I hear another knocking.. DOK DOK DOK.. I would unlock and Open the Door.. I see you standing there.. and I see you have brought companies.. it is the Twins.. two Baby Teddy Bears.. and I am wondering.. why would you bring the two Babies here late at night.. is something wrong.. but.. YOU be telling me you are leaving on a vacation.. and wanted me to baby sit the two Baby Teddy Bears.. but I have No children.. and I have NO experiences with kids.. or babies.. why would you bring them over to my House.. and YOU are asking me that it be for few days.. but looking at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. they are the most cute and you have brought what I can use for the two.. what do I do if the two Baby Teddy Bears starts to cry.. asking for MOMMA.. and if they start to miss their MOMMA.. what am I suppose to do then.. because I have No experiences at all.. and I see you get closer.. trying to hand me over the Little SON.. and as I would hold on with my arms

The Baby Teddy Bear.. the Little Son starts to cry.. and I see the Little SON.. Arms stretching out to YOU.. because He does not want to come to me.. the Cry gets louder and louder.. and arms stretching out to YOU.. wanting to Go to YOU instead of Me.. and His cry so Loud.. hurting my ears.. and I am not sure.. It is so hard for me to control.. and I would ask YOU to come inside.. I see the Other Baby Teddy Bear.. the Daughter starts to cry too.. both being very loud cries.. I just don't know what to do.. why are you leaving them with Me.. they are both crying loud for YOU.. asking to take them with YOU.. My Heart hurts.. it hurts because I know How it feels to be in a pain when YOU leave.. as YOU would try to give me the Other Teddy Bear.. the Daughter.. She is even more worst.. YOU had to hold Her close.. and She would sleep in your arms.. Would not even come to me.. kicking and screaming when YOU try to get her close to me.. and what happens when the Other Baby Teddy Bear wakes UP and knows YOU are not in the House.. but has left her with Me.. the Other Baby Teddy Bear will find Out that YOU are gone.. but for now.. she may sleep.. if the Other Baby Teddy Bear.. the Daughter did not come to me when YOU were here.. I know she is Not going to come to me when I am alone with Her.. I feel so Bad.. My Heart breaks as I would watch the Little SON.. He sees you walking.. the BABY TEDDY Bear starts to crawl after you.. I am watching.. my eyes.. I feel my tears going to pour out.. as I see you walking fast.. going to the front DOOR and the Little SON.. the Baby Teddy Bear crawls crying after you.. as I watch YOU leave the front door.. and the door closes behind.. the Little Son.. baby Teddy Bear sits and cries.. and sits by the door waiting for YOU as He keeps on crying for his MOMMA.. I am standing behind.. just wiping my tears.. It hurts.. this Pain.. it feels like a sharp pain has entered in me.. It hurts watching the Little Son.. hurting.. crying for his Momma.. and turn to look at me crying.. tears hitting the floor.. and turns to look at the door.. what do I do.. tell me.. what am I suppose to do when It hurts me just watching One breaking Heart.. what do I do.. I wanted to go.. Open that front Door and run after YOU.. grab Your Arm and pull and to let YOU see.. LOOK at the Little SON.. look at HIM crying.. why do I have to be the one to watch His tears run down like this.. WHY do you have to break my Heart when I have done nothing to YOU.. why come over and look at the Heart pieces falling apart.. WHY do I have to be the one with the Broken Heart.. it hurts me more than It hurts YOU.. as I would walk.. closer to the Baby Teddy Bear.. the Little Son.. keeps on crying.. pointing to the Door.. wanting to go with YOU.. but.. I know that I can't take this Little ONE to YOU.. and I am just standing here.. I am not sure what am I suppose to do at this Point.. because I can't help this Little Son.. even though I want too.. but.. YOU be telling me you wanted to be time alone.. you just wanted so time off.. to refresh Your Head and that is why YOU are leaving and has made me to be the Baby sitter for the Two Baby Teddy Bears.. I know you have brought all that is needed for them.. so that part I am ready to do what I was told me to do.. but.. I just can't take the pains of the two baby Teddy Bears be crying.. Now.. I am looking at the two Baby Teddy Bears.. both sitting on the top of the Bed.. with the Phone in their Ears listening to Your Voice.. Both looks at each other and smiles knowing that They are hearing their MOMMA on the Other side.. so I am getting closer.. and I am wondering.. few days.. but when is that the few days end.. so that I can focus on drawing picture of you on the New Sketch Paper Book I just bought from an Art Shop.. I want to draw a picture of YOU and to show YOU when it is all completed.. I be drawing YOU.. for a long time I wanted to draw a picture of YOU.. I know that I am Not good in drawing.. but I do want to try so that I can tell YOU.. I can show YOU this is My Heart.. Not Just My Heart.. but it is My Love.. this is a way I want to tell YOU how much I love YOU.. but I need a time alone.. I need my own time.. if the two Baby Teddy Bears are here.. I know that I can't draw anything.. so I would get close to the Two baby Teddy Bears.. I am asking if I can have the phone Back.. so that I can talk to YOU.. but it seems like the two Baby Teddy Bears does Not want to give me the Phone.. they want to hear their Momma speak on the Other side.. I see the smiles and giggles together.. it look so beautiful.. how the two are so Beautiful when they smile.. just like their MOMMA.. YOU are the most Beautiful when YOU smile.. as I would watch the Phone being hung UP.. and the two sitting on the Bed.. looking at me.. I am not sure what am I suppose to do now.. they just looks at me.. and both starts to cry.. crying loud wanting to see their MOMMA..I am sitting by the desk.. I am looking at the shot glass.. and grabbed the Bottle of whiskey and poured into the Shot glass.. placing the whiskey down.. picked up the shot glass.. opened my mouth and take a shot.. I am trying to forget YOU.. but I just can't.. I have placed your picture on the top of the desk.. I keep on looking at this picture.. I tell myself I needs to stop.. but I feel like I needs to keep on looking.. I would look at your picture and say.. why are you doing this to me.. why do I have to keep on looking at you.. of course I have a pencil and a clean white sheet of paper.. I want to draw.. looking at your picture.. I want to draw the picture of you.. but I know that I am not that good in drawing at all.. but I can feel.. this whiskey starts to kick my head.. I feel light headed and buzzing.. I know I drank so that I can forget you.. but why is it that I am missing you more now.. I just can't take my eyes off of you.. as I am looking at your picture.. why can't your picture talk back to me.. I want to hear something from you.. but no matter how many times I am going to tell you looking at your picture.. I will not hear anything from the Other side.. but I want to hear from you.. Please.. tell me something so that I don't feel the light headed I am feeling at this point right now.. YOU know that I love you.. I can tell you many times that I love YOU.. can you tell me something.. can you hear me say the words to YOU.. I love you.. and I grab the pencil.. starts to trace and starts to draw.. of course I am looking at your picture.. as I stopped.. putting the pencil down.. I have drawn a picture of a Heart.. I know that I am missing your Heart.. and I am looking at this pieces of paper.. looking at the Heart.. this is suppose to be your Heart.. so that I can touch it.. as my hand Teddy Bear.. a Son.. who is crying for YOU.. asking me where is MOMMA.. how am I suppose to answer the Baby Teddy Bear's question.. I want to know where YOU are.. but only thing I have is your picture.. I want to hear from you as much as this SON in the room.. crying and crying.. I thought that something was wrong with me.. I thought that My Heart was crying.. crying because I miss YOU.. that I love YOU.. that I want to see YOU and that I want to be close to YOU.. I heard this cry.. but it is Loud cry.. and I turn to look at the bed.. the baby Teddy Bear looks at me.. and I see the tears keeps on dropping.. wetting the bed.. and starts to cry and cry.. I am getting more emotional.. I am trying to get drunk.. but this Baby Teddy Bear is not helping me at at.. and I go over to the Bed and I sit.. I show the Baby Teddy Bear.. this Picture.. is it your Momma and the head moves up and down.. and I give the baby Teddy Bear the picture.. He wraps his arms around your picture and says MOMMA.. and I ask him.. where is your Momma.. please tell me.. and I would say.. I will take you to her.. I would wrap my arms around the baby Teddy Bear and I would lift him up and I get up out of the bed.. Tell me where is Your Momma.. so I can take you to her.. the Baby Teddy bear does not answer.. and I would walk out of the room.. and I am walking down the hall way and I stop.. I see you Holding the Other Teddy Bear.. the Daughter and I see you turn around and you looking at me.. and I am holding the Baby Teddy Bear.. my arms wrapped around.. and I look at you.. I think you have left this.. He is looking for Momma.. and I would see you placing the Other Teddy Bear.. wearing a pink shirt.. and she starts to cry.. Arms stretching out towards you.. and I see you walking closer to me.. and I hear.. MOMMA.. and I look down.. the Baby teddy Bear.. arms are around your picture.. I see you kneel and arms stretches out.. and I would lower myself.. opens my arm.. the Baby Teddy Bear walks slowly.. arms around your picture.. and falls.. starts to cry loud.. and I am thinking.. this Baby Teddy Bear.. I see you get up and I see your arms around the Baby Teddy Bear.. arms around and Lift him up.. I see you holding the Baby Teddy Bear close in your arms.. I see the picture falling and hits the floor.. as you are stand up walking.. the Baby Teddy Bear falls asleep in your arms.. I am looking.. and you go over to the Other Teddy Bear.. the Daughter and you are looking at the two.. my hand grabs your picture and I am looking at Your Picture.. looking at you with two children.. and I see smiles with the Daughter.. the Other Teddy bear as you are touching.. am I suppose to fall in love with this.. what am I suppose to do at this point.. and how about me.. can I be a part of that circle.. I want to hold YOU.. and I want to be held by you the way you are holding the two Teddy Bears.. I see smiles and giggles.. but I want to be a part.. I want to smile and giggle along side.. holding YOU close in my arms.. and holding the baby Teddy Bear.. and Holding YOU to tell you that I love you.. as I am sitting on the floor.. I just want to be with YOU.. I want to be a part so that I can feel the love.. loving YOU

Missing YOU.. asking you to do.. I am standing by the Window in my room.. Looking Outside from inside the room.. in my hand I am holding unto your Picture.. asking myself.. I do miss YOU.. why do I keep on missing YOU.. wondering about the Truck.. the Mail man who drives his truck has Not arrived yet.. I been waiting for this Truck.. and I am looking at the rain.. it is falling Hard as I am looking in the room.. looking through the Window.. waiting for the Truck.. I have wrote YOU a letter.. for few days I have Not written because I was sick.. I been dying in the bed.. could Not get UP out of the Bed.. and when YOU are so sick.. I think it is My Heart.. My Heart is dying because I am missing YOU.. and just can't handle this Pain of missing YOU so much.. for few days as I would be laying in the Bed.. only thing that I could do is grab hold unto your Picture.. and it made me so Mad.. made sick to my stomach because when YOU are so sick.. and having fever.. and trying to eat has been so hard.. coughing and throwing UP all over the Place.. and only thing I be thinking is YOU.. writing you the Letter.. and turning toward looking at the desk.. and every time I would get Out of the bed.. and my Head be killing me.. trying to pull the chair to sit by the desk.. and I would PULL out the Piece of Paper.. holding the Pen in my Hand.. wanting to write.. wanting to tell You something that I needs to say.. and I just can't write YOU On the paper.. and when YOU have to lay back down on the bed because YOU are so sick.. a doctor came to see me.. and told me for few days I needed to rest.. and I knew that is the only thing I could do.. but when I look toward the Desk.. only thing I can think of is the Mail Man who drives his truck.. coming to the Mail Box.. and I know that I am suppose to write YOU the Letter and fold it into half and put into the envelope and give it to HIM so that He can take it to YOU.. when YOU are unable to sit UP.. and the Moment YOU sit up.. trying to move.. my Head be banging Hard from the Inside.. with a fever that won't leave me alone.. it hurts me the Most because I am thinking of YOU.. and I am wondering.. what if YOU are standing out by the front door.. and YOU are waiting outside.. and YOU be looking at the Truck.. the mail Man who takes you the Letter to YOU.. I remember last time I went.. I was in the truck with the Mail Man.. and I wanted to be the One to tell YOU that It is me who has been writing you all these letters. that I wanted to show YOU for the first time.. that the One who sits be this side.. who sits in the room.. who sits on the chair by the desk.. that it is I who would pull out the Clean sheet of paper in front of Me.. and I would sit looking at your Picture.. I would stare at your Smile.. and I would ask myself.. is My Heart be moving because of YOU.. am I allowed to move my Heart.. am I allow to tell YOU that my Heart is moved when I see YOU.. that I do have a Name.. that I do have a Heart and yes.. most times I be missing YOU.. wanting to see YOU again and over and over I want to see YOU.. that I wanted YOU to know for sure that even though YOU may not see me Much.. but I just wanted to show UP one day to tell YOU.. I do have a Face.. that I do have a Name and that I want you to remember me.. Not to forget who is the ONE who loves you the Most.. and Not to forget me at all.. so I remember asking the Mail MAN.. if I can go with him to the Place where YOU live.. just to see YOU.. I just wanted to see YOU for the first time without Having Your Picture in my Hand for once.. How does My Heart feel when I see YOU face to face.. to meet YOU even from afar.. from the distance but enough to know that I am looking at the One who I love the Most.. I remember you took my breath away as I stood there.. I told the Mail MAN not to leave so fast.. that even with this much of space and distance I am alright as long as I am standing there looking at YOU.. I felt my Heart and it started to beat so fast.. did Not know that It was my Heart making the Noise.. beating from inside.. it felt like I was listening to a Drum beating somewhere but I believe.. I know that It was My Heart when I saw YOU standing by the front door.. I wanted to walk over.. and go to YOU and give you the Letter inside the envelope but.. I had to tell myself.. Not Now.. Not yet.. so I do remember opening the Mail Box and putting the envelope inside your mail box.. as the mail man asked me if He could go.. and I told HIM that He can go now.. as the Truck started to leave your mail box.. I just could not hold it in anymore.. I felt my tears.. and It ran down two lines as I would watch the Truck.. the mail man drives off.. because I am wondering now.. when can I see YOU again.. How long is it going to be from that time I was there.. will YOU let me visit you again or are you going to react the same way.. standing by your front door and Not moving at all.. YOU know that I am Not a stranger anymore.. but I feel like YOU are treating me as One.. you know that I been telling YOU what is in my Heart.. at least you can let me know that YOU been receiving the Letters and Knows that YOU been reading the Letters right?? Do you even take the time to read or do you just look at the envelope and PUT it on the side so that It can sit there to ROT like my Heart.. when the Mail MAN drove the Truck back to the My Mail Box.. I would thank him for taking me to the Place.. where YOUR MAIL BOX was.. and the mail man looks at me and noticed that I was crying and asked me why.. and I would turn to him and tell him.. what if YOU don't read any of the Letters that I write and give to YOU.. what if YOU do not open any of the envelope and the mail man tells me.. if I love YOU.. just to believe in the Love of giving.. if I really do Love you so much.. for me to always have the open Heart and just to wait.. to be patient with YOU will heal in time.. Just to Wait on YOU.. and it breaks my heart that this is the Only words I would hear.. I wanted to hear that YOU do take your time and you would open the envelope and YOU would sit and read the Letters.. and I started to cry louder.. of course He looks at me and decides He should go.. and I would watch the Truck.. the Mail Man drives Off.. I felt so broken hearted.. I do remember that it started to rain as I would stand there crying.. maybe this is the reason why I gotten so sick.. I stood there and it started to rain down on me hard.. as I would just turn and LOOKING at the MOON.. and did not care about how heavy the rain waters hit me.. getting me wet.. very wet all over the place.. but ALL I think was.. the distance that YOU made me feel.. and that I am Not a stranger any more.. I know that I can't be just a stranger to YOU right.. I been telling YOU.. writing you Letters.. and I have been telling YOU My Heart.. that from my Heart.. when I grab HOLD unto your Picture.. all I can think of is telling YOU how much I love YOU.. and I stood looking UP at the Moon.. and I do remember just going to sleep after getting wet.. for few days it has been so hard.. when you feel like YOU are dying from the inside.. with Hot fever.. and your burning UP because YOU are so sick.. can't get UP to eat.. and coughing and just feeling so down and Hurting all over.. the few days goes by.. and I am able to move Now.. and able to eat well.. and I been thinking of YOU more clearly.. but for some reason.. when I did Not touch the paper.. and did Not hold UP the Pen to write a Letter to YOU and Only thing I did was to Hold Unto your Picture and just stare at YOU and Your smile.. YOU start to miss something deep within.. I started to miss writing you a Letter.. and I knew I had to get the Letter Out.. so I went over to the Desk.. pulling out a clean sheet of White piece of paper.. and started to write YOU what is in my Heart.. and do YOU know what I been saying to you through the Letter.. I started to tell YOU about the few days that has been happening.. How I had to lay on the Bed and just could Not move much.. about the time I went over with the Mail man.. in his truck.. I would tell YOU through the writing that I felt like YOU giving me the distance and felt like a stranger instead but in my Heart.. I wanted YOU to feel close to Me.. for YOU to know that I been waiting for something that YOU can open UP with a smile.. just like the Picture YOU gave me with this Big Smile.. but My Heart broke when I saw the distance.. of course I know that it does take time for YOU to come close and Yes.. meeting YOU and seeing you the First time when YOU did Not expect was My Mistake.. maybe YOU did Not think that it was me in the Truck with the Mail Man.. or just surprised to see me without telling you in the Previous Letters I wrote to YOU.. and even though I wanted to surprise YOU.. I wanted in a way that Not like I am a stranger but that close person.. and I would share and write about the experience with the doctor who came into the home.. and How much I did Not like the fact that I had to lay there and do Nothing.. I just wanted you to know that I wanted to see YOU because I wanted to see if YOU loved Me.. if YOUR Heart would ever open to accept me as I am.. and to know that I been loving YOU for a Long time.. that I just can't stop but still be missing YOU and still be waiting for YOU because I know that I love YOU.. I wrote a Long Letter.. two Letters and folded into Halves and Put into the envelope.. Right after I finished the two Letters.. I had so much on my Mind and so much to say.. which is needed to come Out to tell YOU the Heart of Mine.. I would put the One Letter in One envelope and the second one in a different envelope.. and as I stand UP to leave.. I turn to Look at the window in the room.. and I just could Not believe what my eyes were seeing.. It started to rain down Hard.. this time I am not going to stand Out there to get very wet.. because of the rain

Open.. and I would stand by the front Door.. and I can see a figure.. but it is a figure of a woman.. in a white dress.. I know that it is Not the Mail Man.. and can it really be.. is this true.. and as I am looking.. the rain Stops.. the Hard pouring down of the rain suddenly stops on me.. and I can feel something.. My Heart is being moved.. My Heart is being touched.. can it be really YOU.. is It YOU who is standing on the Passenger side of the Truck.. and I just can't go On.. because YOU are taking my Breath away and if it is YOU who got the ride with the MAIL MAN.. in his truck and YOU came.. How can this Be true.. and I started to cry.. My tears just can't handle this feeling I am from the inside my Heart.. I would start to cry Loud because YOU just don't know how much I love YOU.. YOU do not know how much My Heart.. my MIND loves YOU.. my hand holding unto two envelopes.. and I would start to walk towards the Mail Box.. and I would stop by my mail Box.. and I see your eyes looking at my Hand holding unto two envelopes.. as I stop by the mail Box.. all I can do is cry looking at YOU.. I wanted answers.. because I had questions running through my Head.. wondering what is in your Heart.. but I know Now.. I never knew that YOU would come like this.. and Yes.. I was very sick.. for few days.. I wanted to die.. and wanted to never wake UP from this dying of my Heart.. Now I know the reason why I was dying from Inside.. it is because I love YOU just too much.. and it is YOU who I love the Most.. as I lift UP MY Arm.. and I see your two hands holding unto the two envelopes.. and I would say.. I have written two letters of what happened.. and YOU will know why I was delayed.. and YOU will know why I delayed because I never stopped loving YOU and even Now stronger than before I love YOU.. YOU are the most beautiful who takes my Breath away and even leaves speechless.. that is because I love YOU..I am looking Out the Window.. Looking for the Truck.. I know that the time.. looking at the watch.. the Clock in the room and I am looking through the window.. the empty Bottle on the top of the desk.. and I know that I been drinking.. trying to get YOU off my Mind.. ever since the New Picture came.. when I opened the envelope and I would pull out the Picture you have placed inside.. I would be looking at it.. ever since I saw this new Picture.. trying to erase YOU off my Mind because I been thinking of YOU and just looking.. telling your New Picture.. How Much I wanted to see YOU.. asking you through the New Picture.. when can I be close to YOU.. but only thing I been getting is No responses because it is Only a New Picture of YOU.. as I would write YOU another Letter.. telling you how angry I am getting because it seems Like I am the Only One who sees YOU.. am I the Only One who is going crazy.. is it only Me who be missing YOU.. is it only my Heart who misses you the Most.. is it only my Head which I am thinking about Love.. just wanting to say I love YOU.. do you not miss me at All.. do I ever cross your Mind.. how about your Heart.. if only I can ask your Heart.. what do you feel about Me.. am I truly special to YOU.. am I the Only Man who can Love YOU.. please tell me some words so that I can hear YOU.. that I am able to smile knowing even miles apart.. miles which leaves such a long distance.. but I needs to see YOU.. as I would sit by the desk.. pouring on the Shot Glass.. I would be taking shots after another shots.. as I would be looking at your new Picture.. the Photo that YOU gave to the Mail man.. who came last week and gave me the envelope.. Now I am going to ask him if I can go into the Truck and if the Mail Man can take me to the Place you Live.. I may Not walk towards YOU.. but close by I want to stand to see.. I just want to know How you are doing.. How would I feel if I see YOU in person.. even though there will be a distance between Us and I know that I can't come close right Now.. but enough room and space knowing that YOU are there.. I am Not asking you to come close to me Now.. but at least YOU can see that I am doing Good.. and that still I be loving YOU.. I may Not be able to say it to YOU yet.. but when YOU see me inside the Truck.. which the Mail man would drive to take me where you are.. I just want you to know that it is Me.. whose been longing for YOU.. whose been waiting on the Other side.. by my mail Box I would be waiting for the Truck.. for the mail man to stop by on my block as I would wait by the mail Box.. just to give you a Letter putting inside on the envelope so that He can take it to YOU.. but this Night.. I know that I must go.. I must go with the Mail man.. be inside his Truck and I want to deliver the Message in this Bottle.. I want to surprise you.. so that YOU will remember that it is I who is loving YOU.. not to scare YOU but to show YOU that all this Time.. YOU would only think of the Truck.. the mail man who was inside the truck.. and he was the One who gave you the envelope with the Letter that I wrote inside to YOU.. but please.. forgive me when I show Up on this very night.. I must go and see How you are doing.. I must be there to give YOU this Bottle.. inside the Bottle is a Letter that I have written for you.. when YOU see me inside the Truck.. don't think that I am a stranger to YOU because It is me.. it was me all along who gave you the Letters.. inside on this envelope.. after a while.. you are only seeing the Truck passing through and it stops at the Mail Box.. just to give you the envelope.. that is all you see back and forth.. but How about me.. how about the person who sits in this ROOM.. who is the One pulls Out the Clean sheet of paper.. who would be holding a pen or the pencil and who thinks of YOU.. YOU do not see me because I am always behind the scene.. you may think that Am I afraid of YOU.. am I scared to show UP.. you may be thinking maybe it is the truck.. or the mail man being friendly to YOU.. and He would smile inside the Truck as he gives you this envelope.. I know when YOU receive the envelope and once you open the envelope inside is the Letter.. but Do you see my Face.. do you even think of my Name there.. do you know who is the One who is telling you all these things.. expressing Heart to Heart.. when I sit in the ROOM.. by the desk.. I am thinking of YOU.. constantly thinking of YOU.. looking at the new Picture.. my Heart is crying inside for Love.. I am crying in my Heart for Love too.. but it seems like after awhile you begin to forget.. you forget because YOU are looking at some one else but How about Me.. do you know who is the One who be really loving YOU.. all this time.. who is the One putting every thing In and Out.. and telling you how I feel.. I do not want YOU to forget about me.. I am putting into so much work here.. you know that it is not easy to tell YOU all these things.. and it breaks my Heart when YOU forget the face.. forget the person who has a Name.. who is the One loves YOU the Most.. who be missing YOU and thinking of you constantly.. what will happen when a Day Comes.. the Truck stops on your Mail Box.. and you are starting to forget the Man who loves YOU the Most.. and you stand there looking.. the mail man looks at you and says.. there is No envelope today.. and the Truck keeps on coming to your mail Box.. and every time YOU stand there.. the mail man tells you the same thing.. there is NO Letter today.. there is NO envelope.. and I know if you start to forget the One who loves YOU the Most.. I also can be the one to delay the Letters.. because I feel like YOU are forgetting the Face.. the name and the man who loves YOU the Most.. as I would look at the Empty Bottle.. and I would roll up the Letter I have written for YOU.. I do not want YOU to forget me.. because YOU know how much I love YOU.. have been loving you just too Long.. but also I know that I must Man UP.. I must tell you that I am still here.. and that I am going Nowhere but waiting patiently till you are truly ready for Me.. I want to get close when YOU are ready so that I can Love you fully.. and able to speak to YOUR ears.. and tell your ears.. looking at your Heart.. that all this time.. I want your Heart.. I want your Heart to know that I love YOU.. and Now.. sitting by the Window.. I put the Letter inside the Bottle.. and looking out the window.. and just waiting for the Time.. the arrival for the Mail Man in his Truck to stop at the Mail Box.. I been taking few shots on this shot glass.. and it has emptied the Bottle.. I wrote this very night telling you that I missed YOU.. and I just don't want you to forget about Me.. because it is I who loves you the Most.. I would get UP from the chair.. holding in my hand is the Bottle inside is the Letter.. and I would walk Out of the ROOM.. and going to the front Door.. I open and I close behind me.. I am looking at the Mail Box.. and I know that the truck be arriving very soon.. so I would walk down to the Mail Box.. waiting for the truck to come.. and as I am waiting for the Truck.. I see the Lights and I turn to look.. I see the Truck Coming and the Truck stops by the Mail box.. the mail man looks at me and smiles.. and I ask HIM.. can YOU please take me to where YOU are.. and I show him the Bottle.. and inside is the Letter I wrote to YOU.. and the mail Man was kind and telling me to come inside the truck and to stand by the steps.. as I would stand there.. and the truck would be driving.. and the Mail man drives to a Mail Box and he stops the Truck.. and as I am standing there.. I see you on the Other side.. YOU are standing by the front Door and I am standing on the steps and I see your Mail Box.. as I am looking towards the front Door.. I see you looking at me.. I do not know what it is but my Heart.. can YOU hear my Heart beating.. It would not stop beating as I am looking at YOU

Else is doing so.. That is why I had to tell myself and to have courage to tell YOU this very Night.. I wanted to surprise YOU.. so that the Impact of Your Heart you feel inside.. it has meaning of what I am doing today.. that is to tell YOU that it is me who is the One loving YOU.. some times when a person do not show UP.. you think of it is some one else but the truth is to be told that is it ME.. who is the One loving you the Most.. I just wanted to come out this very night to make a clear statement.. that I do not forget the One who I love.. and I wanted to see YOU face to face.. to see you in person so that YOU would remember.. that there is someone like Me who has been loving YOU.. and I would look at your Mail Box and I would open and I would place the Bottle.. inside is the Letter and I put into your mail Box and closed the Door.. and I see you just looking at me.. and the mail man would start his Truck and it would leave your mail Box.. as he was driving the Truck.. I feel like my Heart has lightened.. I feel like a burden Off my shoulders because of telling YOU.. face to face and in person to person letting YOU know who is the One writing you these Letters.. so that I know when you receive these Letters.. YOU can think of me Too.. that YOU can think of a face.. and that face is a person who has a Name.. that my name can be placed in your Heart.. can I write my Name inside your Heart so that whenever you receive a Letter from YOU.. that YOU will never forget and know who I am telling you all these things to YOU.. I don't want you to be confused because I am only One person.. Only One man.. who has a Heart and can express this Heart of Mine to YOU because all I ever wanted to share is this.. that I love YOU.. that there is going to be NO OTHER man like myself.. who can give YOU something very simple but has a meaning behind every time I think of YOU to give you letters.. OH PLEASE help me so that YOU don't forget me.. I am giving YOU my Heart and my Love to YOU.. the Only thing that I can do and can be good at in the Long run.. as the Truck stops by the Mail Box.. I get off the steps and I turn to look at the mail man and I thank him for his service by taking me to your mail Box.. and he looks at me.. and smiles.. I see the truck leaves the mail Box and I would look UP at the MOON.. why can't I be there a little longer.. Now I feel it in my Heart that I am Now missing YOU more.. was it a wise choice for me showing UP.. and looking at you from the distance.. seeing YOU eye to eye.. and able to tell YOU how my Heart was heavy because I was feeling like you are forgetting all about me.. and YOU would wonder.. why do I think this way.. it is because there are times I would doubt what if YOU are Not seeing me the same Way.. you can see my Heart and how much I love YOU but.. what if YOU are not loving me in any way.. It is only going to Hurt me in pain because I do also want your Love.. I wish that I knew that I can be Loved by YOU.. so that I know we are in the same page together.. all I ever wanted is to give and tell YOU that I love you but also be loved by YOU too.. that is the Only One thing truly I need and want from YOU.. nothing more and nothing less.. just to be Loved by you because YOU already knows that I love you just too much.. but it is in my blood to just love you more and more.. that is the Only Good thing I can do.. just to share and tell you.. How much I love YOU..I am waiting for the Truck.. the Mail man in the truck.. I heard from the Mail Man that you told him that YOU are writing a Letter to Me.. I couldn't believe the respond that I am getting.. I thought that I would Never hear from YOU.. I been writing you a lot of Letters lately and has Been sending it Out.. Hoping that One Day.. that One day be some day SOON.. I been looking UP at the Moon.. asking if the MOON can hear me.. asking if YOU KNOW what is happening on the Other side where YOU at.. I would keep on asking that MOON.. do YOU see.. can YOU SEE.. but I never got any kind of response from the MOON.. until the MAIL MAN.. who came on the Truck and told me that HE has heard from YOU.. that YOU are writing something to Me.. I tried to sleep.. the Night I have received the Message from the Mail man.. who came on the truck stops by the Mail Box.. I was walking Out.. with the envelope in my Hand.. inside is the Letter I wrote to YOU again.. when I showed him.. the MAIL MAN the envelope and told him I wrote YOU a Letter.. I saw a smile on his face and tells me.. there is something that He needed to tell me which it was received from YOU.. and I asked him to tell me.. that YOU are writing a Letter.. a letter sharing to Me and I saw HIM taking the envelope I gave him inside is my Letter I wrote to YOU again.. It was a NIGHT I wanted to dance.. it was the Night I looked UP at the MOON.. I waved my hands looking at the MOON.. people who were walking passing by the Mail Box looks at me.. I am sure they are thinking I am a crazy person.. but I would say to them.. I don't care what they think of Me.. if you do NOT KNOW WHAT I am feeling and dealing this very Night.. I don't care.. and I would be walking back to the House.. trying to lay down on the Bed.. I am trying to sleep.. but My Heart.. my Mind.. I be thinking of YOU.. turning on my side and I am looking at the desk.. I am just picturing YOU sitting by the desk and with a Piece of paper.. with a Pen or Pencil.. I can envision YOU writing a Letter to Me.. so I would turn the Other way.. looking at the wall.. facing the Wall because I know.. if I look at the Desk.. I be thinking of YOU and I would not sleep at ALL.. but facing the wall.. and able to close my eyes.. I just could Not sleep.. I can feel my Heart beat pounding Hard.. this excitement all over my body keeps me UP and I would sit UP.. sitting on the bed.. I am looking at the wall.. I just can't sleep.. HOW am I suppose to sleep tonight but I needs to sleep to get a good rest for the Night.. but I would try to sleep.. laying on the bed.. turning side to side and sitting back UP again.. if I turn on the side towards the desk.. I be seeing you there so I rather Not see YOU through the vision.. I turn on the other side.. facing the Wall.. and I sit UP again.. maybe I needs to get something Off my Chest.. maybe I needs to speak to this wall.. things all always on my Mind about YOU.. I can't just let it sit there.. I needs to express and tell YOU.. More and more I express my Heart to tell YOU.. the More I needs to say something to let YOU KNOW.. let you know How much I love YOU.. so LOOKING at the wall.. I know that YOU are Unable to hear me on the Other side.. but I still needs to tell YOU why I just can't sleep tonight.. some nights I can sleep well.. but there are Nights I just can't when YOU are on my Mind.. when YOU sink into my Heart.. I just have to let it Out.. WHY.. I am Not sure why I needs to let it Out.. but it starts with I love YOU.. it starts with I love YOU and I miss YOU and I would say looking at this WALL.. I been waiting for YOU.. walking Out of this ROOM.. walking Out of this House.. I am looking at the Mail box.. before I go to the Mail box.. I would be looking at the Desk.. when I sit by the Desk I look at How many Papers I have left.. I needs to have plenty of papers because there are some I won't give it to YOU.. I have a trash can which it gets loaded with rolled UP balls of papers that goes into the waste because I can't put it into the envelop.. so I needs to look at the stacks of paper.. when It gets very low.. I go to the store to Buy More Papers so that I can write YOU MORE letters to send it out to you.. SINCE I am able to see the mail Man and he has became My friend who is helping me.. He tells me there is NO need to put stamp stickers.. HE is able to take the envelop.. the Letter direct to YOU.. so told me there is NO NEED to put any stamps.. I would smile.. and I would weep at the same time.. to able to write YOU a Letter.. something that I can endure.. something that I truly enjoy and Love.. a Passion that was given to me since the YOUTH.. I started to write when I was very Young.. so for a very Long time I loved to write and still do even more.. because now to share this True Joy and Passion and something that I really enjoy and love.. I can write you letters more than any other MEN can in this world.. ONE thing that I can tell YOU is that MONEY cannot By My Love.. cannot by what I am doing and what I am giving to YOU because it is because I really Love YOU.. YOU may not see it Now.. I am Not sure when YOU WILL see my Heart but I believe that ONE DAY.. SOME DAY YOU WILL SEE it.. the day YOU see my Heart of How much I love YOU is the day when YOU WILL see the MOON appear before YOU.. on the Night Your Heart will see it.. is the day YOU will realize because The MOON still be there LOOKING at YOU.. I may be gone.. I may be GONE far away.. when YOU DO see it is the day YOU will remember the Letters because I will Love you even after when I am GONE.. as I am looking at the wall in the ROOM.. I needs to see YOU.. I wish that YOU can see me.. see my Heart soon.. because the Day when YOU see me.. I be asking the Angels.. when I am gone.. can I be an Angel TOO.. an Angel who can still Love YOU after I am gone.. but I am always around.. that I am close to YOU this time to able to still Love YOU.. I may not be able to speak or write YOU Letters but I am able to appear before Your Eyes.. BY the time YOU do not receive the Letters.. and YOU know my real True Heart.. there is NO reason for you to receive Letters any more because by that TIME your Heart Knows who Loves YOU and I be able to come before you to tell YOU Not by Letters on Words but by being YOUR ANGEL.. An Angel who can always be there and An Angel who will always

Paper into the envelope Inside and I would run Out of the House.. the Mail Man in the truck tells me HE saw me in the room.. and saw me writing a Letter to YOU.. and knew I was running late.. so I came out.. running and catching a breathe and gave the envelop into his Hand.. He smiles and waves taking it to YOU.. I would watch as the Truck gets smaller.. tears in my eyes because the MAIL MAN was patient to wait for me when It was me who was late to give.. but He still waited knowing that I was coming OUT and giving YOU a Letter.. as I am Facing the Wall in the ROOM sitting on the top of the Bed.. and my tears fills UP my eyes.. I wish that YOU know my Heart.. sometimes am I being just too impatient with myself.. because YOU know that I love YOU.. I love you just too Much.. from here to the MOON I love YOU.. why can't you believe my Words.. why can't you believe me and see me the way I am.. why can't I just love you as I am.. Please tell me why I can't just love YOU as for Me.. and My hands rolls into two fist and pounds on the wall of this ROOM.. and shakes.. I really really needs YOUR eyes to open and Heart to open to see me that I love YOU.. My fear is this.. Only the day I come to YOU as an Angel.. DO I needs to Die for you to know My Heart.. the day I am gone and I been Out side.. at Night when the MOON Appears.. I been asking the MOON.. where is the Angels.. Please tell me are the Angels There with YOU.. Please let the Angels KNOW I have an request.. I want to Know if I can ask an Angel for something.. I been going Out at night when the Moon Appeared.. and kept on asking and begging and Bugging.. One Night an angel did Appear before Me.. and I would have the Picture of YOU in my Hand and I would have the Letter on the Other Hand and the Angel came to Me.. and I showed that Angel my Heart.. HE saw the Picture of YOU and saw the Letter and told the Angel.. my Wish.. My request.. and I asked the Angel.. I may Not be able to be with YOU when I am on this Body.. but I think it is when I am gone.. when I die and the Angel looks at me.. and I would tell the angel.. I been writing YOU a Letter.. and the Mail MAN came to take the Letters in the envelop and has been receiving the Letters.. if I can't be with YOU when I with this Body.. I think the Only way is when I am gone.. and the Angel looks at me and said.. But I said.. if I die.. can YOU Please give me two wings.. Can I be an Angel who can still Love YOU afterlife.. IF I can't be with YOU here on the earth with this Body.. and the Angel would say to me.. the Wish and the Request is granted.. and the Angel left away.. as I am in the ROOM.. Looking at this Wall.. I am able to smile still because I have been given this request that it does NOT matter about Now.. that I am thinking about Later.. and that I can still wait for YOU as long as I can live.. because as long as I live I am able to tell YOU through the Letters HOW much I love you and keep on writing on the Piece of Papers.. the Mail Man comes and smiles always being the friend who I never had knowing and understanding and can relate my Heart.. I give him Letters so that He can take it to YOU and I know that even though I may not see YOU now.. I can wait.. but what happens when I die.. my Heart is for YOU to Love Me.. I wish that YOU can love me too.. as much as I love YOU.. My whole request has been this simple.. to LOVE me back.. YOU do not have to love me as much as I love YOU but can think about loving me.. I am thinking thought.. How the Angel has agreed to this that HE will send me two wings the day I die.. I hope that YOU can see my Love when I die.. even though I want to see YOU see me Now.. but if YOU can't still see me Now loving YOU.. I must learn to wait.. I must learn to be patient with YOU but.. is it when I am gone you will know that I love YOU.. is it when YOU start to miss ME when I am gone.. the day I am gone and far off.. but it be the Most Glorious day when I receive the two Wings and can approach YOU closer.. When I come to you as Your Angel.. I am going to show YOU that I came to Fight on your behalf.. to Protect YOU and to defend YOU because I been loving YOU FOR such a Long time Now.. my wish is that I wish that YOU can see it Now.. and when it comes to be never.. it breaks my Heart because I been writing you Letters that I love you since the day One.. I have never stopped loving YOU.. but do I needs to be Your Angel for YOU to finally see my Heart of loving YOU.. I would look at this Wall and I would be crying.. It hurts.. It hurts because I needs to Die.. I needs to be gone.. but I still be loving YOU when I am gone.. but it be that I can't write you Letters when I become Your Angel.. when I do have two wings.. I know I can appear before your eyes.. and I will show YOU that I love you still.. but what If I can't speak to YOU.. if I can't tell you this Heart of Mine when I do become.. that is what I fear when it does Happen.. but as I am looking at the wall of the room.. wiping the tears of my eyes I turn to look at the desk and I get out of the bed going to the chair to sit by the desk.. and I sit.. the Piece of paper and pencil to write you another Letter of how much I love YOU.. I just wanted to say.. I love you and I miss YOU..I am waiting for the Moon to appear.. in my hands is a Letter I have written for YOU.. but I am waiting for an Angel.. Do you know that I believe in Angels and I would ask if the Angels could Come as I am asking for One to appear before my Eyes.. as I was sitting by the desk.. and I would write.. pulling the Piece of paper before me.. I would be looking at your Picture.. Only if YOU know my Heart.. trying to let YOU know How much I love YOU.. I been practicing writing on this Pieces of Papers.. I would even grab One Piece of paper.. walking to the Mirror in the rest Room.. I am Not a Person who can speak well in speech.. I may not be able to speak right with the Words when it comes face to face.. But I know that I needs to practice my Speech telling YOU and Letting YOU know How much I love YOU.. as I am in the rest Room.. I am Looking at myself the Mirror is in front of me.. I know that I can let YOU see the Letter.. but.. I am alone in this House.. so I would show UP.. looking at myself and trying to Picture YOU standing on the other side.. will I have the Boldness.. WILL I have the courage to Tell YOU what My Heart feels.. WILL you let me speak to YOU about How much I love YOU.. as I am looking at myself.. Looking at the Mirror.. Holding the Piece of paper.. and I would try to talk.. try to speak.. but my Words would Not come Out because I am Looking at Me instead.. but I know that I needs to practice.. practice more to speak to YOU.. to tell YOU.. to have the Guts and Courage.. but I am wondering will YOU even give me Your Ears to listen.. will YOU give me the attention that I need from YOU so that I am able to talk to YOU.. to get something Off my Chest.. letting YOU know what I am thinking.. to Let YOU know that I love YOU.. I would open my Mouth.. and I would start to read from the Letter.. and I would say to YOU.. even though YOU are not here.. But I am envisioning that YOU are here and able to listen to the Words I am telling YOU.. speaking to YOU.. I would say.. I can't get my Mind Off of YOU.. the More I try not to think of YOU.. it seems like it is getting More Harder.. I would take a Look.. and looking into the Picture.. that is the Only One thing I can do.. is to LOOK at you when I have your Picture in my hands.. it has been so hard lately.. because I been alone.. I been writing YOU Letters.. but How can this Letter ever reach YOU.. do YOU even know How much I love YOU.. will you let me tell YOU that I still do Love YOU.. WILL you open your Heart.. open your ears to let me talk.. to let me speak.. will I be nervous to tell YOU if I stand before YOU.. having the Courage to tell YOU.. then I would ask.. will you give me the time and the attention that I needs so that I can tell YOU from My Heart.. Lately.. I been walking to this Mirror.. and I know that One Day soon.. if I do Not practice Now speaking and sharing.. and talking while Looking at the Mirror.. I know that I will never get the chance to tell YOU or say to YOU because I know that WHEN I see YOU.. I want to be well prepared.. I want to be ready to Tell YOU that I have a Love story that Only YOU can hear.. that I can share to YOU.. would you give me Your Time and energy.. your attention is all I am asking for.. all I need so that I can tell YOU.. I been looking.. trying to speak.. because I am not well in speech.. but I do know how to write Many Letters now.. and the Best way.. fastest way for me to reach YOU is by giving YOU this Letter.. I can look at myself and holding UP the Piece of Paper in my hands.. and reading the Letters.. How long can I be doing this.. and I would ask.. How far can it go if only thing I do is read the Letters looking at myself at the Mirror in front of Me.. I would keep on trying.. after sitting down by the desk.. I would pull up the chair.. with the Pencil and write YOU a Letter.. letting YOU know there is so much going On my Mind.. burning inside of My Heart.. that I still Love YOU.. I would pick up the Picture.. taking a Look at YOU.. and always.. it brings me great Love and Joy and Inspires me to write and to tell YOU a Story that I love YOU.. the Only thing that I can do.. the Only thing I can bring out from My Heart.. and I go to face the Mirror.. and I look at myself.. I wish that It be YOU on the other side.. I want to tell YOU.. I want to read the Letter to YOU.. but I am only looking at myself and it breaks my Heart that I am only reading to myself.. But I want this Letter to reach YOU.. so that YOU know my Heart.. my longing has been growing.. missing YOU brings Hate in my Heart cause of the pain that comes with it.. I wish that YOU know

Looking at myself and just reading the letters.. it is NOT For me but for YOU.. so I have decided to change a New Way.. I would wait.. waiting until the SUN goes Down and asking for the MOON to come UP.. I would walk Out side.. and stand alone as I see the Night has approached.. I am holding the Letter In front of Me.. and I have heard that there are Angels WHO is able to listen to an OUT CRY of the Heart when YOU LOVE.. I would stand.. Open the Piece of Paper.. the Letter is in front of Me.. and I started to LOOK UP at the Moon.. but I am Not asking the MOON anything.. but an Angel.. if the Angel can hear me on this very night.. can the Angel be the One to do me a Favor.. I have One wish.. and It is very simple Wish.. to Hear the Heart of Mine crying for YOU.. I know if the Angel can hear the sobbing of my Heart.. my Tears of pains that comes from inside.. if the Angel can hear me and can feel sorry for Me because I am asking for the Angel to Give this Letter to YOU.. I can sit on the ground and weep.. sob in tears for many hours if I have too.. but if an Angel.. who is passing by through My direction and catches me in tears.. I know that the Angel can stop and Looks DOWN from the Sky wondering what is wrong with me.. and I can say to that Angel.. I am man who loves to write Love Story.. but it is a story of YOU.. story of how much I love YOU.. and that I am asking that Angel.. if He can do me a favor.. to give this Letter I have written to YOU.. to send the Message that I been here.. all along waiting for YOU.. if the angel asks.. I would tell that Angel.. I have even tried.. I even went to the rest room.. after I sat on the chair by the desk.. and I would show the angel the Picture of YOU.. and tell the Angel.. who YOU are and I would say to that Angel.. I would write with the pencil on the Piece of paper.. and I would get UP and go to the rest room.. and I would stand looking at the Mirror of myself and I would read the letter that I wrote to YOU.. I been doing that for a while.. but It seems like it has no Hope.. because I am only reading it to myself.. I want YOU to hear me.. hear my voice.. hear my words that I do speak.. I do talk and say.. share what is in my Heart.. but what good is ALL that when YOU can't even hear me.. if YOU just don't know or understand.. and I started to LOOK at myself on that Mirror.. in Pain.. what good is it if I am the Only One who knows it for myself.. so I have decided to walk Out.. and WHEN I saw the Moon.. if I love to stare at the MOON in the Night.. I am sure an Angel can also Love the Moon just like Me and can spend the Night looking at the MOON.. if I can be loud and Clear and if the Angel who is staring at the same MOON I am.. I know for sure.. the Angel can hear me Out.. hear my misery of NOT able to get the Letters to YOU.. Hear this Heart of Mine crying in the Night as I am staring at the MOON.. if the Angel sees Me.. with a Broken Heart and the Longing.. waiting for YOU.. waiting for your answer.. I am sure the Angel can look.. as I would walk Out side.. Not just Once.. but each Night.. two days.. four days.. ten days I am out.. holding the Letter.. and I am looking UP at the MOON.. open my mouth so that YOU can hear me Out Loud.. I am sure after many times of walking with the Letters.. the Angel can see that I am very serious.. I am Not asking Much but it is so simple.. to let YOU know my Heart.. to Let YOU know that I love YOU.. to Let YOU see the Heart of Mine.. that I am falling for YOU.. I need YOU and I need you to know that I love YOU.. that I be missing YOU.. DO you even know that.. can YOU SEE that.. and I know that One night.. with your Picture in my Hand.. and I be looking.. on the Other Hand is the Letter.. after I look at you through the Picture.. My Heart breaks into tears.. and I am missing YOU.. I will say why do I keep on missing YOU.. why must you be so far that it is so Hard for me to reach YOU.. why leave me like this stranded.. why let me die here just to Love YOU.. why do I must crumble and be hurt.. why be so miserable but at the same TIME the Joy to Love.. with this ache that leaves me this Pain.. it Hurts a lot sometimes because YOU are so Far away.. but I want YOU so Near.. so Close that my arms can wrap around YOU.. and to let YOU see the letters.. here is One that I written for YOU.. I know that I may not be good with speaking.. talking with good speech.. but I know that I can memorize the Letters that I have written for YOU.. to tell YOU a Story.. My Love story of How much I love YOU.. so that YOU can know forever that I love YOU.. as I am Looking UP.. Looking at the MOON.. I am holding the Letter.. and I open my Mouth and I read the Letter Loud.. I would say Out Loud.. do YOU hear Me.. can YOU Please hear me.. will YOU please listen to what I needs to say.. to tell YOU something that Keeps on coming from My Heart.. that I been coming Out here.. LOOKING at the Night.. I see the stars.. I see the Clouds and I see the Moon above me.. and I am waiting for an Angel.. I do truly believe that an Angel can hear me right Now.. and if an Angel who is passing by decides to stop and to listen.. I am sure that the Angel can come to my aide to Help me with this Letter.. so that this Letter can go to the right person which is YOU.. I want to say.. I been loving YOU.. I keep on telling YOU how much I love YOU.. but do you really believe in this Word that I am telling YOU.. I know that My Heart is Not mistaken.. but it is real because the Only thing I can do is tell YOU that I love YOU.. there is Nothing More I can say.. there is Nothing but the three Letter words I can tell YOU.. which is I LOVE YOU and I want YOU to know.. I want you to know this truth before I go.. because I know that One day SOON.. YOU will know for sure the truth.. that I do really Love YOU and meant it with my Words.. I been waiting for the Angel.. so that if the Angel appears before My eyes.. I can tell that Angel.. and show the Picture of YOU.. and the Angel is going to get it.. will understand it.. the problem is this.. what if this Angel comes and sees YOUR picture and also that Angel falls in love with YOU.. even with the distance and miles away.. I love YOU.. even with not spending time.. and knowing YOU in face to face.. I just love YOU as your are.. I don't need to be in your Presence or be with YOU as in face to face in person to Love YOU.. even with this Miles separated between US.. I just Love YOU just the way YOU are.. if YOU don't believe me.. I know that when the Angel shows UP with my Letters In the hands and gives to YOU.. and when the Angel holds the Picture of YOU and shows YOU.. I believe by that time YOU will know that I love YOU.. I don't needs to be there to Love YOU.. because it is all about Just Loving you First.. when I love YOU.. YOU will know what a Love means in a time when I can't love YOU anymore.. I am Not sure How long I will live.. but as long as I am alive.. I know that I still can love you.. breathing.. I know I can say to YOU that I really Love YOU..I am looking at the paper in front of me.. looking on the floor.. on the ground.. on the carpet floor.. few papers been rolled into balls.. I would try to write you a letter.. with the Pen.. and would make some mistakes and with the Pen.. there is NO eraser to erase.. so I would grab the Piece of paper.. when it has been made mistake while writing YOU a Letter.. I would roll into the Ball and it would Hit the carpet floor.. been struggling.. my Heart been struggling so Much.. I would look at the Cup.. pouring the Can of Beer.. and I would grab the Glass cup.. drinking the beer.. I can feel bubbly inside.. trying to erase YOU off my Mind.. but when I place a Piece of Paper in front of the desk.. I want to tell YOU something.. I want to write you something.. something that I needs to say that comes from My Heart.. that sinks in my Head.. and I can't just hold it in.. but Needs to tell YOU as I would write you this Letter.. when YOU been practicing for such a Long time writing.. and for a long time it becomes a part of YOU.. Like a lifestyle and changes into.. that is where I am at this Point when I would pull out a clean sheet of piece of Paper.. I know that the Truck is coming.. the Mail man.. with his truck.. He is coming to this Home.. to the Mail Box.. and I know that I am running out of time.. and I needs to put something.. Needs to tell YOU something on this Piece of Paper.. I received something from YOU.. an envelop.. a new Picture YOU put inside and I have Never seen this Picture before.. YOU are smiling.. Holding a Bear.. I am Not sure what kind of Bear is this.. do I call it the teddy Bear.. and My eyes.. I keep on looking at this new Picture.. YOU look so beautiful.. YOU look so Cute holding.. holding this small bear.. and it seems like YOU are trying to tell me something.. are YOU telling me that I am small like this Bear.. because I do not like that Small bear.. of course I am Not saying I am tall because I am Not.. but when I look at the new Picture of YOU.. holding that small bear.. it means that I wish that it be Me.. I want to hold the small bear.. and I want to hold YOU close in my arms too.. putting down that Small bear.. and to tell you that YOU are so Beautiful.. the Most Beautiful that I ever saw in my life.. that YOU are just too pretty.. just too beautiful.. even without holding that Small Bear.. just YOU in the Picture alone is enough to say.. YOU are so Beautiful.. there is NO reason to be holding that small bear.. and is this what I should Put.. should write.. to tell YOU on this Letter.. or should I say to YOU.. I been missing YOU so bad lately.. but this very Night.. I had to go into the kitchen and grab me a cold can of Beer.. and grabbed a glass cup.. Open the Cold Can of Beer and poured into the Glass cup and I would sit.. sit by the desk looking at the new Picture of YOU holding this Small Bear.. I would

I been wondering where YOU are.. I am just missing you so Much right Now.. is it because of me you have left.. or is it something else.. You know that I am always here waiting Underneath.. Just please Come Out side at Night.. Just Look UP at the sky at Night.. when YOU find the Peace within YOU.. and just loving YOU.. you do not have to do anything.. because I am Not asking for anything but just asking can I still love YOU.. will YOU let me Love YOU.. if YOU are going through some Hard times.. there is NO One who feels always Happy on the Other side.. always something is happening and Life can be a true Drama.. but Let me know something that is True.. something that is real.. that I love YOU.. NO matter what YOU are going through.. it can be sad.. sometimes YOU can feel mad and angry.. frustrated just because.. feels like YOU want to cry or even just being truly Happy and joyful.. that I still love YOU no matter the Conditions that YOU are weathering In.. as long as YOU can walk Out side and come when YOU see the Night.. I love the Night because I get to see the Big Moon.. and when I stand still and be quiet.. and Just be able to LOOK UP at the MOON at night.. I find true peace and Joy.. because I am thinking of YOU.. I get to take my time Out.. from all of the busy days of running errands and work.. but when I want to think of YOU the Most.. I be in the room.. sitting by the Desk.. I would open the drawer and when I look inside.. there is YOUR Picture.. I would pull the Picture Out and In my hands I be holding your Picture tight.. I would kiss the Picture of YOU and tell YOU.. of course I wish that YOU be here to able to listen to my words what I have to say to YOU.. but it is Only Your Picture I can talk to right Now.. and I would look over to the corner.. I am looking at the Little Piano who is sitting alone.. it breaks my Heart because ever since I loved YOU.. I always wanted to share something Out more then just a Letter.. I really wanted to tell YOU.. speak to YOU and also finding ways if YOUR Heart can be touched.. be Moved by something else.. some much More I wanted to give to YOU because I love YOU.. I remember the first day I saw the Little Piano.. my Mother gave it to me and told Me.. one day she wanted to watch me play this Little Piano.. I would make such a rude remarks about it because I did Not want to play at that Time.. teacher who teaches Piano came to my Home.. I would sit next to the teacher and she would play so well.. gave me home works to do to practice.. told me many times that I needed the time to practice.. I would Not listen to the voice.. never played and never practiced.. I remember my Mother told me.. what if YOU find someone YOU really Love.. it is something More than a Money can ever Buy.. it can be a gift from the Heart if YOU truly Love.. and you wanted to share it to someone so Special.. and I am looking at your Picture.. and I wish that I would of listened to the Voice of my Mother because she told me.. it is a GIFT that even a Money cannot buy a One's Heart.. as Long as I love YOU.. it would of been the greatest gift I could of given YOU because I know that My Heart.. who Loves you even More Now.. I love YOU much More because when I look at your Picture.. I can't stop but smiling.. my Heart feels so Hot and it gets warm.. gets Hot and turns warm.. when I grab Hold unto your Picture.. I can feel my Heart.. I can feel the Beating of the Heart goes fast.. I want to stop my Own Heart to stop beating so fast but like Me.. My Heart never listen to my voice.. when I look at the Little Piano IN my Room.. it is sitting there.. and I would be sitting by the desk.. I would be looking at your Picture.. there are Nights I wish I could turn back the Clock and I know my Mother would of loved me playing well.. because even though she is my Mother.. the Heart of a woman never lies about Another Woman what she can truly feel when a MAN can truly share and expresses HOW much I love YOU.. and be real with my Heart and my Words to YOU because it will show what MONEY just can't buy.. I know that being Poor can be very bad but having a lot of Money who cannot share anything.. LIKE a WALL.. what good is a MAN if He cannot tell the Woman HE loves that HE truly Loves YOU.. when you look at a wall.. what good is the wall if it be a MAN who can't speak UP and share.. I rather be poor.. and have very little Money but has a BIG HEART to always tell YOU that I love YOU.. that I can do whatever it takes until YOU be in my Arms.. into my arms I will hold you close forever.. until YOU say to me that It is very Hot.. then warm.. then it gets very HOT and yes.. I can make you feel so HOT because Love has NO Language.. it is an universal which ONLY very few MEN in this world can understand the Heart of a WOMAN.. as I would pull the chair and sit.. pull open the drawer and I would take Your Picture Out of the drawer.. the First thing on my Mind.. I will say.. I missed YOU and the Next would be.. I love YOU.. YOU may Not hear my words right Now.. YOU may say maybe it be never I can say it to YOU.. but I believe that Love can change Your Heart.. if I truly Love YOU.. and able to tell YOU through the Letters.. I am sure that One day.. it can hit into the right Spot of your Heart.. of course I do not know when or HOW long it can take.. but I believe that One day soon will be here.. after I take a Look at your Picture.. My Head turns to look at the Corner.. in the corner of the room.. the Little Piano sits and It waits for Me.. even though I would stare at the Little Piano.. I know it is telling me to get UP and go over to the Little Piano.. bring the chair and sit by the Little Piano instead.. but I would be reminded of my Mother's words.. that if I don't learn it Now.. later will Never come and when I become older and starts to Love.. there will be a time when I would look back and remember the Words of my Mother telling me.. why am I asking Now.. when my Mother pushed me so Hard then for me to learn it.. My Mother pushed me Hard.. and told me when I let this Go.. don't be crying back to her asking for another chance because by then it is just too Late.. and I would be looking at the Little Piano.. tears are filled Now because I wasn't serious about the Words she told Me.. my Mother said.. Music is like an Art.. something that can be expressed and can be very creative with.. something that I needed to learn my Own experimenting with it.. and I do look at my Mother and I do tell her.. she is Right.. because Now I love YOU.. I show the picture of YOU to my Mother.. and I would say.. Mother Look.. I want to play the Little Piano.. I want to share and say how much I love YOU.. but tell you More.. much more ways.. and I would be wiping the tears from my eyes as I am LOOKING at YOU in the Picture and I turn to LOOK at my Mother.. WHO sees the Little Piano in the room.. and I would say.. I regret Now.. it is so Sad that I feel this way when I look at the Little Piano.. and even though I be asking for a second chance.. I would say.. I need another chance.. I need a second chance to Learn HOW to play this Little Piano.. as I am getting older.. I feel my Heart hurt so bad because I missed out one of the greatest way to tell YOU that I love YOU.. Only if I learned at the Time.. because when My Mother told me to Learn it and the Teacher came.. it was the perfect timing.. I would be watching the fingers.. key bars hitting and sounds.. and I would be stepping back watching but I had the distaste for it at that time.. if I knew you back then.. if I saw you at that age.. when I was much younger.. I wonder what would of happened at that time.. it be the right timing.. the perfect timing.. and yes.. if I saw you then and Loved YOU then.. I would of gave my Whole heart learning and playing.. just for that One day when I see YOU.. I be playing the Little Piano and letting YOU know how much I love YOU.. I would still look at the Little Piano sitting in the Corner of the Room.. as I would stare at it many times.. I would love to play.. instead when I walk Out of the room.. I would walk out without looking at it because I know that I would think about regretting of the chance I had.. because I would be crying still because losing the chance really hurts me Now.. as I would walk Out of the ROOM.. I am holding the Letter in my Hand.. and I would be walking Out of the House.. and In the Night.. when I see the Moon UP in the sky.. I would walk alone by myself.. and I would stop as I stare at the MOON who is above me.. and I would turn to face the Moon.. and as I lift up the Letter in my Hands.. and I would read the Letter to the MOON.. I would say.. if I learned How to play the Little Piano years ago.. I would of brought the Little Piano Out here with Me.. does Not matter who is around.. but I would put the Little Piano in the Middle of the road.. and I would sit on the Piano Bench.. I be looking at your Picture.. and looking at your picture it inspires my Heart to tell YOU what my Heart truly feels of Loving you.. it does Not matter who would stop to listen.. people can pass by.. they can call me crazy.. or tell me to go Home.. but I do not care because I am Not out there for those people.. I am out here in the Night.. with the Little Piano.. playing a SONG to YOU.. I know that YOU would not be able to listen to the Playing of this Song.. YOU will Not even hear my voice singing out to YOU.. but I don't care.. I would close both eyes and I know that even though YOU may be far.. a Long distance from me.. in my Heart.. inside my Head.. in my thoughts.. YOU live inside of Me.. as far as YOU are.. in my vision and IN my Heart.. I can feel you close.. I guess it does Not matter about the distance because what counts is How much I love YOU.. that I know.. I believe that if I truly Love YOU.. On the Other side.. YOU are able to know

All along.. I have been underneath this MOON.. every time I saw the Moon appear before me.. I would walk with the Letter in my hands and I know that I would pass the Little Piano that is at the Corner of the room.. it been better if I was able to bring the Little Piano Out with me.. maybe the reach of my words of sharing and reading could of been faster.. it can grab the attention to many people when they see me sitting Out in the middle of the road.. Playing the Little Piano.. underneath the Big Moon above me.. people would of heard it and let it be known.. but I know that I can't play the Little Piano and that is why it is taking a lot longer to reach YOU.. but It does not matter how long the wait because I know that If I love you.. I can wait.. I am ABLE to be patient to wait for YOU.. as Long as YOU Know still.. I still believe in Love and I do still Love YOU.. as Long as YOU can come Out at Night.. and Underneath the Same Moon at Night.. only thing I wanted to say and ask YOU.. if YOU ever show UP on a Night where YOU see the Moon.. can YOU hear me.. tell me that YOU heard me On the Other side.. because if YOU are hearing a Voice.. it is Me on the Other side.. speaking to the MOON and telling the MOON about How much I love YOU.. if YOU can hear a voice and knows that it is Only One voice YOU hear.. it is more like going to be Me on the Other side.. sharing from Heart as I would open the Letter I wrote to YOU.. telling the MOON.. I miss YOU.. that I love YOU and still been here waiting for YOU.. Until the day Your Heart knows who is the One loving me.. I hope that YOU will see that in your Heart.. that it is NOT another person but YOU know that It is me who be loving you.. because I want to say.. I really Love YOU.. and always I will love you still.. as I turn to LOOK at the House.. I see my room.. and My Heart breaks because when I walk into my room.. the Little Piano sits and waits for me.. asking me to Play if for YOU.. asking me.. begging me to play a Song to YOU.. I hit my chest because My Mother's voice.. there is something that Money just can't buy.. the day when YOU find someone YOU love.. it can be a gift to tell how much you love and Now.. I have found the One I truly Love.. I wish that I learned.. because.. I would of have the Letter in my hands.. but also be playing the Little Piano telling YOU that I love YOU.. YOU will hear the News about me.. it be everywhere because when I am able to tell YOU that I do.. I really would keep on telling YOU.. even when I die.. even when YOU die.. I be by your grave and tell YOU.. with the Little Piano and with the Letter.. I still Love YOU.. I have the tape Recorder in my hand and I would stop the record and Push the Play button.. Listening to the Song in the back ground.. I am listening to my voice.. it was the day I got very drunk and I just can't help myself and just pouring Out my Heart.. I was sitting down on the Desk and I would be looking at the Letter I wrote to YOU.. letting you know How much I am dealing with this Missing YOU.. there are times when I feel so Lost and it drives me Mad.. it drives me crazy when I am dealing with YOU when YOU cannot be found.. as I am sitting down by the Desk.. listening to the Tape recorder.. I can hear myself crying as I am sharing my Heart to YOU.. telling YOU how much it hurts to be missing YOU and when will be the time I can be with YOU.. I know it sounds so non sense but there are days I just needs to be with YOU.. that I want to be with YOU close.. and I am wondering How can I get YOU close to Me.. so that I can tell YOU how much I missed YOU and been loving YOU.. why can't I tell you these words of Mine to YOUR ears.. and No matter How much time Flies.. the Love I have for you seems to grow stronger and stronger because all I ever want is for YOU TO be close to my Heart and for you to always remember how much I love YOU.. as I would press the Stop button on the tape recorder.. I want to mail this tape Out to YOU.. I wish there was a way for me to give you this Tape which I just heard my voice telling you that I love YOU.. will you believe my words when I tell you this.. if you receive this Tape that has been recorded by my voice with the Piano sound in the back Ground.. would you believe me that it is my Heart that I put into for YOU.. as I would sit and LOOK at the tape.. I know that I can't mail this to YOU.. I know that YOU won't listen to the tape because there is A lot of crying on the Other side.. I was so drunk.. I do not remember much because it seemed like I blacked Out after.. but I do still want to give you something from My Heart.. it is to give YOU a song.. I want to write YOU a Song.. a Music.. but I am Not sure will you listen to the Music.. to the song that be send to YOUR Way.. as I am looking at the Little Piano.. I put the Little Piano next to the desk.. and I have the Empty Glass Jar with me.. and I wish that If you cannot be here with me.. if I am going to be missing Your presence.. at least leave me with Your Heart.. I would be asking.. if you can please give me Your Heart instead.. then I would not miss you too much because at least I can look at your Heart.. I wish that I can have your Heart.. will you please give me Your Heart.. I want your Heart so that I know that YOU will come.. Only way YOU can come a little Closer is when YOU have your Heart.. I can truly imagine Your Heart.. as I would open the Door.. front door and I would see a Small Box in the front.. as I would take the Small Box into my room.. and I been giving YOU a Note.. a Note that went to YOU asking for Your Heart and I believe if you have read this Note.. I be asking.. if YOU ever stop BY.. if you are close By.. there is Only ONE thing.. One Wish I need from YOU.. all I be asking was that ONE thing.. it is Your Heart.. Let me please have this Heart so that I can surprise you with a Gift.. as I am holding this Small Box.. I see the Note attached.. I just could Not believe that YOU have responded to the Message of the Note.. because when I looked at the Note YOU have placed on the TOP of the Small Box.. I would read what I have wrote to YOU for One WISH I needed.. I am touching my Chest.. I can feel my Heart beat as I would look at the Note and It was my Own writings of the Note.. It means YOU have read it and you have responded to the Message which I felt my Heart be touched of Your reaction to this One request I been asking you for A Long time.. I sit on the floor.. and I open the top of the Small Box and I take a LOOK into the Small Box.. It is a Heart.. Not just any Heart.. but it is Your Heart.. for a Long time.. I been asking and Needing this from YOU.. I would hold your Heart with Both Hands.. and as I would stand UP on two feet.. I go over to the Empty Glass Jar.. inside the Glass Jar is soft Cottons laid inside to Protect Your Heart.. I place your Heart gently lowering inside where your Heart lays on the Soft Cottons.. I can't feel my Heart.. I feel like my Heart is skipping its Beat as I am looking at your Heart.. It must be that I love Your Heart.. that I love your Heart as much as I love YOU.. I would place the Glass Jar with Your Heart inside on the TOP right side of the Little Piano.. I know a friend who can play the Piano well and brought him over to Play a SOFT songs for Your Heart.. as I am looking at the Letter I wrote to YOU.. it was last Night I had to sit by the desk and I would write through the Night.. as My friend comes and he sits on the Piano Bench and I look at his Hands.. his fingers touches the Piano Bars and starts to Play a Music.. Play a SONG.. I would Look at the Letter.. as I would LOOK at your Heart inside the Glass Jar.. and I would start to Speak to your Heart as I would get closer to the Glass Jar.. I would say to your Heart.. ALL I ever wanted is for YOU to come close.. I know that I am poor.. I have truly nothing to give YOU that is really important.. I am hearing the Sounds of the Little Piano playing.. with such a soft tunes and I would look at the Glass Jar.. Looking at your Heart.. I would say to Your Heart through the Glass Jar.. I have been asking for your Heart.. But it seems like YOU never wanted to show me Your Heart.. I always wanted to feel close to YOU.. a Heart to Heart close is what I am talking about.. I been struggling trying to figure Out How can YOU Love me.. I know that I have found a Way to tell YOU that I love YOU.. to transfer and to deliver to YOU some way and some how.. even though when I would walk Out side.. and when I look UP at the MOON.. I see and clearly feel the Long distance between Us.. I see How High the Moon is when I look UP at the sky.. and How far it is to get to that MOON.. it is the same way I feel when I think of YOU.. How High and How far it is for me to get to YOU.. but I know that I will never give UP.. as Long as I know that there is that ONE DAY.. and I believe strongly in that some Day.. NO matter How many times My Heart can Break or How Much I can feel the Hurt and the Pain I must endure.. and How much time I needs to wait.. even though it can be Never to be with YOU.. as Long as YOU know that I still Love YOU and I still believe that some Day it can happen.. having that Hope and to keep on dreaming of loving YOU still.. I know that It can come true.. as YOU can see I never thought that I can write YOU a Letter.. who ever thought that I can believe in this Love.. but there was that One day.. I would start to think beyond.. I start to think about the MOON and think about going Beyond.. what if I can JUMP over the MOON.. walk if I can walk on the MOON.. even though I may never be able too but I can still dream very BIG and never give UP on that dream to Love YOU.. as Long as YOU are able to receive on the Other side and that YOU are able to give a Little bit of that TIME.. and for you to open and to look at just One Letter that I write to YOU telling you that

Because YOU know that I been here loving you for just a Long time.. Don't you want to love the One who loves you the Most.. don't you want to know who loves you the Most.. because It is Me.. It always has been me who been loving YOU still.. all I want you to do is just remember me because this is the Only thing I am hoping for.. just that One wish is for you to Know and to remember that there is a MAN out there.. if YOU feel lonely and alone in times.. YOU should walk Out side.. and be by yourself.. and Just LOOK UP.. if the Moon appears before your eyes.. that is when the time YOU can see.. some one is thinking of YOU always.. who is loving YOU still.. who is on the Other side who been LOOKING UP at that same MOON as your eyes be looking.. that On the Other side.. I feel the same way.. that I do feel lonely in times and many times when I walk out side.. I am alone but I love to LOOK at the MOON when I am alone because It reminds me of YOU and I be thinking of YOU and I smile while I am looking at that MOON because I know that MOON knows me.. Knows my Heart.. knows How much I love YOU.. telling YOU.. looking at your Picture as I am standing Out side alone.. as the MOON is before my eyes and I be opening UP my Heart looking at your Picture and I am sure the MOON can hear my voice.. can hear my out cries when I share from my Heart of How much I miss YOU.. How much I love YOU.. but I would say looking at your Picture.. it hurts.. Loving YOU is the greatest feeling in the world to have but missing YOU hurts me the Most.. it kills me in times because I want you close.. I want you close as my arms can wrap around YOU.. as near I can feel your Heart Beat and listen.. and I can know that Your Heart is so beautiful.. just the sound of the Beating of Your Heart is all I can say when I listen.. because I love YOU.. as I am looking at the Glass Jar.. the friend stops playing the Little Piano because.. I am looking at your Heart inside the Glass Jar.. and it is moving.. Your Heart is moving.. does it means that Your Heart is beating for Me.. I am Not sure what that means because I would stop reading the Letter I have place before me.. and I turn to look at the friend.. I know that I love YOU still.. it would be a Lie if I say I don't.. but it seems like I am growing to Love you More each time I share.. each time I write YOU a Letter.. I can feel my Heart just growing more.. that I want to say.. WILL you ever come close to Me.. I want YOU to come close to me.. Please help me How do I do that.. Please help me a way so that I get close to YOU.. close to your Heart so that I can tell YOU.. can I love you forever.. WILL you let me say How much I love you forever.. I can tell you forever that I love YOU still because I know that I will die if I can't love you.. I know I will die if I can't tell you how much I love YOU.. it is in my BLOOD to love you for ever because YOU are my forever Love.. Please show me your Heart so that I can keep continue to Love you more and More and to grow to Love you more and more over and over again.. I just wanted to say.. I love you still.. Watching the Rain falling from the sky.. I came Out side.. just could not get YOU off my Mind.. thinking of YOU hurts My Head because it starts with my Heart be missing YOU.. trying to keep my Mind.. my thoughts out of YOU.. I decided to walk Out side.. but did Not expect the Rain to show UP.. as I am standing.. I see the Light rain showering Down.. When I am in the Room.. I been drinking a lot.. the Bottle is inside in the Room.. and Now it is empty bottle.. How can I take a Message to YOU.. How can I tell YOU that I am waiting for YOU.. to tell YOU that I love YOU.. will you let me Love YOU over and over again.. waiting here.. I know that I just can't tell YOU.. as I am Out side.. I brought the Little Piano.. and I been trying to record the Playing of the Piano on this Recorder.. I can Put the Tape into the empty Bottle.. so that I can send it to YOU.. But How.. that is the Question that has been popping in my Head all this Time.. I be in the Room.. siting by the desk.. and I be looking at your Picture.. as I would LOOK at the Picture of YOU.. there is something that I must say.. I must tell YOU before it be Just too Late.. Not sure what it is but I know my Time is running Out.. and the TIME tics very fast.. that is WHY I have NO Other time but Now to tell YOU.. what's been in my Mind.. what's been in my Heart.. and I needs to tell YOU.. But.. How am I suppose to get it across to YOU.. if I am here.. standing Out side.. Looking at the Rain falling from the Sky.. it is lightly Rain.. the Little Piano is telling Me that I needs to play a Song for YOU.. that I needs to hit the Key bars which brings Out a tune of songs.. something that YOU can listen too.. but I be asking my self.. WHAT DO I Play.. I be looking at this Little Piano.. who is standing Next to Me Out side.. if I know that I can't even play this kind of Instrument.. but my Heart is telling me that I needs to play a SONG for YOU through this Little Piano who is with me right Now.. it hasn't been played for a Long time.. but it wants me to Play something.. but I know that I can't.. that is HOW I feel about YOU.. that I wants to be with YOU.. that I wants to see YOU.. and be near YOU so that I can tell YOU how much I love YOU.. that My arms been missing YOU.. asking myself I needs to Hold YOU close in my arms.. I needs to hold you tight.. but I know just standing here Out side.. after LOOKING at your Picture and taking some shots of the Liquor in the Room.. I feel like looking at this Little Piano who is next to me.. even though the Presence of the Little Piano may be near me.. I can't even play a Song.. I can't compose or write a Music.. I can't sing while playing the Little Piano.. but it is very close to Me here.. so I been asking myself.. what is better.. If you were near me and very Close but I can't do anything with YOU.. or is it better that YOU are so far away and I ache of missing YOU.. but.. is it the Letter that I can write to give YOU.. because I would sit by the desk.. and I would look at the Pen in my hand and I would LOOK at the Piece of paper in the front.. LOOKING at your Picture of YOU.. just aching and Missing YOU.. I would pen it DOWN on the paper.. sharing and telling YOU as I would write.. what My Heart be telling me.. How much I been thinking of YOU and Missing YOU.. that YOU are the Only One who I love.. that YOU are the Only One I think of and the One who I misses the Most.. as I would stop.. Pouring on the Shot Glass the Liquor.. and I would sit.. Aching this pain from my Heart.. I would like to tear my Heart Out of me because it hurts.. Missing YOU hurts me.. and also just loving YOU hurts Me.. and also just thinking of YOU hurts me even More because there is NOTHING I can do.. and I would LOOK.. Look at the Little Piano.. and I am holding it in my arms.. I want to play.. I want to sing.. I want to bring Music Out of by pressing on the Key bars of this Instrument to bring Music OUT so that I can sing songs to YOU.. it drives me Nuts.. it drives me crazy because I see the Little Piano.. and I think of YOU and I want to share More to YOU and express this Heart to YOU.. but How can I if I can't Play on this Little Piano.. to tell YOU by singing songs.. I would be crying OUT my Heart as I would tell YOU through the Voice.. singing and singing Out my Heart as YOU.. as I would have the Letter In my Hand and through the Letter I would write.. I write my Heart which has YOUR NAME on the Front telling YOU.. WHY is my Heart be burning and why do I feel like I am dying.. drowning deeply.. LOOKING at the Little Piano makes me Cry.. it makes me want to cry Harder because it is a way to tell YOU.. if I would of learned years back of playing.. and when I did had that Chance to practice.. Only If I could turn back at the age of the YOUTH.. I should of learned at that TIME of the Chance.. I know if I did take that Chance at that TIME of the YOUTH.. I would be playing on that Little Piano.. and I would also record my Voice to tell YOU.. even though I may not have a GOOD voice to sing to YOU.. I would of practice my voice if I learned HOW to play this Little Piano.. and I would find ways to tell YOU MORE.. I be able to sit on the TOP of the MOON if I can.. and I be holding the Little Piano in my arms.. and sitting on the TOP OF the MOON.. I know that YOU are able to hear me Out.. I would turn to YOU.. and will say.. CAN YOU SEE ME.. I am sitting on the TOP of this MOON.. I do not know How I got here but I begged for two WINGS and It was provided just for this ONE VERY NIGHT.. to Put on ONE show.. I have written YOU a Letter so that WHEN YOU hear me playing on this Little Piano.. YOU can hear my Voice.. every Night.. I been thinking of YOU.. My Voice hurts but I had to practice.. every NIGHT I sang Out from my Heart.. crying because My Heart tells me HOW MUCH I love YOU.. Crying to tell YOU that THIS IS what Happens when YOU LOVE.. I don't want to be Like a Little GIRL because I am NOT.. but I can express and tell YOU.. as I be going into the rest room.. and singing SONGS.. working Out with my VOICE to be Heard.. it be that Just One Night.. where I can Sit on the TOP of the MOON with me is the Little Piano with me.. as I sit next to the Little Piano.. and my fingers on the Key bars of the Little Piano.. I would have your Picture with me.. showing YOU here is YOU.. Your Picture and if YOU can see me sitting in the TOP of the MOON.. my fingers would Hit the Key bars and it brings Out the Sounds.. making Songs with the Music from the LITTLE PIANO.. I would pull out the Letter.. and I would read the Letter Out Loud where YOU can hear my Voice telling YOU.. and I would say.. I been practicing for a long time.. Of course YOU would of Not know it because It was truly Behind the curtains.. I would Not tell any

YOU.. can YOU see me now.. Can you hear me Now.. Please give me Your time for few minutes because It is Not going to be that Long.. I been loving YOU.. and I am Not just saying it so that it make you feel nice.. I am saying it and telling you because It is In My Heart whose been loving YOU for So long.. can YOU hear the Little Piano playing a SONG.. can YOU Hear the Music that is coming out of this Little Piano.. I had to write the Music so that YOU will know that It came from me to YOU.. SO Please.. give me few Minutes of your time to hear me Out because I will Not be Long.. and as I would tell YOU what I have written on the Letter.. I will say to YOU.. I am Not sure when the Next time would Be.. when I will get another Chance to sit on the Top of this Moon.. but if the MOON allows me to get back here again.. I would so that I can tell YOU more with the Little Piano making song and music to Come alive.. I am only doing this to YOU so that YOU can see the real side of My Heart of How much I truly Love YOU.. and as I am standing next to the Little Piano.. I am Looking UP at the MOON.. and the rain starts to fall harder and harder and starts to pour down.. and I know I am getting More soak wet as I just stand here.. I am Only LOOKING at the MOON high above Me.. and I am NOT siting on the Top of the MOON any more.. I know that the Only way YOU can hear me.. that YOU can see me is if I can sit On the TOP of that Moon.. and show YOU this Little Piano with me.. playing to tell YOU how much I really Love YOU.. as I turn toward the Door.. I am able to take the Little Piano with me Back to the House.. I can't play the Little Piano what breaks my Heart.. even if there was a Chance for me to Sit on the Top of the MOON and the Little Piano with me.. I still would NOT able to share.. or Play the Little Piano to YOU.. that is how I feel most nights.. WHEN I look at your Picture.. when I pull your Picture and I take a Look at YOU.. I can only look.. but I want to have YOU close.. I want to be with YOU and tell YOU can I be with YOU forever.. will you be mine for ever please.. and I sit by the desk.. aching.. and I feel like I am getting sick because Just like the Little Piano in the ROOM.. in the Corner of the ROOM it just sits there and I would go over to the Little Piano.. I would touch but I can't Play or bring out any songs or make Music to this Little Piano.. when I sit by the desk.. I sit and looking at your Picture.. My Heart feels so sick sometimes.. because I can't be close to YOU.. I been telling YOU.. I been writing YOU letters.. and getting inspired by your Picture when I look at YOU when I think of Loving YOU.. I would tell YOU over and over.. typing to YOU to tell YOU how my Heart feels so Sick.. I think I am getting sick because I need YOU.. I need your Love.. I need you to be with Me.. I want to hold YOU and tell YOU that I am sick in my Heart because I love YOU just too much.. YOU are the One who can come and heal this Broken Heart of Mine.. my Heart is drying for Your Love.. I am dying for Your Love.. and when I look at the Little Piano.. I want to cry.. I want to sob and weep Out Loud because.. just like when I look at your Picture.. this is all I can do.. Nothing More I can do.. when I look at the Little Piano.. I can't do much with It.. I want to play.. bring SOUNDS.. the Joy of singing songs while Playing on the Little Piano will make me the Most happiest person like the DAY I can finally see YOU and meet YOU face to face.. I don't think My Heart be dying any more or be sick any More.. I be the Most happiest person in the world because it is just YOU.. it is YOU who I love the Most because all I want to say is I LOVE YOU..I am laying on the Bed in the room.. I am hearing songs playing in my Head.. even though I can't sing.. I can't even dance.. I can't even write Music or even compose.. I can't even write any lyrics.. But.. tell me why is a SONG playing in my Head.. and the room is dark because the Light has turned off in the room.. I am moving side to side.. and I am thinking of YOU.. I want to play a SONG for you.. only if I was a musician.. I would sit.. writing lyrics.. and writing the song notes.. composing a Music.. and I be thinking of what to say.. to express this Heart.. and to tell YOU through Music.. playing instrument to say that I love YOU.. but How.. How can I tell YOU that I love YOU more.. if only I have listened.. and what good is it now of regretting.. the Times when someone came to try to teach me how to play a song.. as I am sitting on top of the Bed.. I feel like the Times has gone by so Fast.. that I realize I am missing something to share.. to tell YOU more.. Is only Letters that I can tell YOU.. But My Heart wants to tell YOU so much More.. How can I tell YOU when YOU can't hear me on the Other side.. and I want to say something to YOU.. to YOUR HEART.. as I am looking at the corner of the ROOM.. I see the Little Piano.. it has been sitting there for a Long time.. and I would touch the key bars.. I would just press the key bars to bring Out the Sounds.. but I know that I can't play anything on that Little Piano.. but I wish I could.. I wish I have so that I can tell YOU.. only if I have two things.. YOUR HEART.. when are YOU going to give me Your Heart.. so that I can place YOUR Heart close to this Little Piano.. at least YOU can hear noises and sounds coming Out from that Little Piano.. and I would place your Heart.. Putting inside the Glass Jar.. and I would sit.. bringing a chair so that I can sit next to the Little Piano.. I would place the Glass Jar.. with Your Heart.. on Top of the Little Piano.. and I be crying looking at Your Heart as My Heart be burning inside of me because I love YOU.. I would say.. do YOU Hear me.. can YOU Heart this Heart.. it is burning and beating fast at the same time.. WHY can't YOU see me.. why can't you hear Me.. as I would pull the Letter.. with the pencil in my hand.. and I would LOOK at the Glass Jar.. LOOKING at Your Heart.. OH HOW MUCH I wanted to say something to this Heart of Yours.. and it has been such a Long time I been asking for this Heart.. why did it take so Long for Your Heart to come.. Now I am much older and grey.. do YOU think that I can walk properly and just waiting for the grave.. can I still tell YOU when I am laying on my own grave.. it has taken this Long.. I am an Older Man now.. and YOU are wondering.. will I still be able to love YOU as where I am Now.. I believe the age is nothing when it comes to Loving YOU.. fully embracing my self.. my Heart to love YOU and to tell YOU HOW much I love YOU.. and as I would be writing YOU a Letter.. with the Pencil.. I be crying looking at the Glass Jar.. crying because I am able to express fully.. to tell YOU by looking at Your Heart.. I am dying inside because I love YOU so Much.. I am dying because I love YOU.. I can feel my own blood rushing down because I can't stop but just loving YOU.. if YOU are to ask me why I died.. what will be written is because I just loved YOU to death.. I couldn't stop loving YOU so I died just waiting for YOU.. I would be writing a SONG.. playing on this Little Piano of what happened to me the Night before I died.. it is because I loved YOU SO MUCH.. just waiting for YOU but YOU never showed UP.. as my hairs turn grey.. and Just waiting.. it is because I love YOU.. after I write on this Letter of How much I love YOU.. I would look at the Glass jar.. looking at Your Heart and I would look at the Key Bars of this Little Piano.. I am Not sure what to push.. which key bars to press down.. the sounds are Not going to come Out right.. but would YOU still listen to the Sounds that each Key bars makes when my fingers presses down.. It is because I want to say something to YOU.. if YOU are asking me what am I going to say through the Sounds of playing on this LITTLE PIANO pushing the Key bars.. I don't want YOU to listen to the Music sound because it will Not make any sense of tunes it brings.. but What counts is that I want YOUR HEART to listen.. please listen to the voice I want to speak as YOU can hear the back ground sounds playing something.. I want to show YOU that it is Not the Noise or the sounds of the Little Piano speaking to YOU but it is My Heart.. I have a heart just like the Heart I am looking in the glass Jar.. I just want to say that I love YOU.. as my fingers starts to press on the key bars of this Little Piano.. my eyes are On the Glass Jar with Your Heart inside.. I want to touch Your Heart.. I want to feel Your Heart.. can YOU hear me now.. Can YOU hear my voice speaking.. I am talking to Your Heart.. that I love YOU.. HOW MUCH MORE WORDS I must say.. I must tell or share for YOU to understand My Heart.. as I am crying looking at Your Heart.. I just want to spend the rest of my Life of just loving YOU.. but YOU are so far away.. this Miles and separations.. the long distances that is killing me from the Inside.. sometimes I wonder what do I do if I keep on missing YOU and I am asking for Your Presence.. I would ask.. take me away because I am suffering.. Take me away first.. Please let me Die.. then I don't have to bear all this pain.. I am suffering because I love YOU.. I feel so painful inside because I love YOU.. I want to see YOU and be close to YOU.. what am I suppose to do when YOU are so far.. miles away that it feels I can never reach YOU.. as I am looking at the fingers.. I do hear sounds coming out from this Little Piano but I have NO idea what I am playing.. it sounds very bad because there is NO song.. this is NOT a music at all.. and YOU are asking me why am I playing on this Little Piano if I can't play a song.. and It sounds so bad.. I want Your Heart to know that it is Not the Sound or the Music.. but Please hear my voice.. YOU can hear my voice clearly if the song is not playing right.. so that I can speak to this Heart.. to Your Heart.. I want to tell YOU

My Lips is moving.. Words are not coming out.. it is because I am sitting on the TOP of the Bed.. the ROOM is dark.. and the Little Piano is on the corner.. and I am trying to go to sleep.. but I just can't.. and Keeps me awake.. My Heart is crying.. My eyes are crying.. My Head is crying because I am crying.. crying for YOU.. wanting YOU close in my arms.. and to tell YOU how much I love YOU.. but I can't.. I get Out of the bed.. since I can't sleep.. I walk to the window and I look Out.. I see the rain falling from the sky and it is still raining slightly.. I feel like this Rain.. my Heart wants to rain because my eyes kept on raining.. will these tears ever stop from my Eyes.. how about my Heart.. I can hear my Heart weeping Loud inside.. asking for YOU.. calling Out your Name.. asking for YOU over and over again.. when can I see YOU again.. when will that day be.. YOU know that I feel like the rain I am seeing outside this room.. and it just don't stop.. lately it has been raining so much.. that It reminds of myself when I look YOU at.. when I look at your Picture.. and I sit.. I be asking for YOU.. that My Heart keeps on raining and when will this rain STOPS.. as I turn away from the Window.. in the Dark.. I see the Little Piano Looking at Me.. asking me to Play a SONG for YOU.. and I would stop and just look at it on the corner.. asking the Little Piano.. what song can I play for YOU.. I can't even play any instrument.. I wished that I learned when I had the chance.. but I did Not wanted to when I was young.. But Now I do regret so much for Not learning because If I learned at that time.. and I would of mastered playing the Little Piano.. I could of have composed a Music and wrote a song for YOU.. and even wrote a Lyrics that goes with the SONG.. I would of have brought the tape recorder in front of me and of course I would of played the Little Piano.. bringing sounds but it be a song just for YOU.. as I would of sang YOU the song while sharing the Lyrics.. after I would of finished playing the Little Piano and sang YOU the SONG.. I would also of read the Letter that I wrote so that YOU know that How much I put into the work.. of telling YOU that I love YOU.. I would of said to YOU.. In front me is the Glass Jar.. Please just imagine with Me.. that I have a Glass Jar.. Inside that Glass jar is Your Heart sitting there.. I would look at YOUR Heart and with Loving YOU I be inspired to share and to write YOU something.. telling YOU.. I saw YOUR Heart.. I saw Your Heart which I waited for a Long time.. I just could Not let Your Heart get away.. when I saw YOUR Heart.. I decided to Put your Heart inside this empty Glass jar.. I did Not want Your Heart to get away.. DID NOT mean to scare YOU at all.. but it is Your Heart.. I know that Only way YOU can come close.. is only if I have Your Heart with me.. I want YOU to come close.. and I thought of Your Heart.. I would Put your Heart.. in the Glass jar.. and there is the Little Piano in the room.. I would place the Glass Jar on top of the Little Piano.. My Heart be touched when I look at your Heart because I wanted YOU.. I wanted to be with YOU.. I wanted YOU to be with me forever so I put inside the Glass jar.. I would say.. I have learned how to play the Little Piano for this very reason to tell YOU More.. how much I love YOU.. I would pull up a chair and I would sit next to the Little Piano.. and My fingers started to press the Key bars.. and a song came Out.. I looked at the Glass jar.. looking at Your Heart.. I would be hearing sounds becoming songs and I sang from My Heart telling Your Heart.. How much I love YOU.. my tears kept on running down as I would sing the song to YOUR HEART so that YOUR Heart can remember how Much I love You.. so that YOUR Heart will never forget that there is someone who loves YOU.. who loves Your Heart.. as I am sitting on the top of the Bed.. in the dark room.. I would lay back down on the been.. and trying to fall back asleep.. but My Heart kept on crying.. and I kept on crying for YOU.. Only if I learned How to play the Piano.. the Little Piano.. right now I be making Music and singing Songs to YOU telling YOU that I still Love YOU.. that I will never stop but loving YOU still.. I just can't stop looking at this Little Piano.. why is it keep on telling me to come Near.. and I am thinking of YOU.. I need your Heart.. I need your Heart here with Me.. that is only way I can tell YOU what is IN my Heart.. I am asking YOU.. Heart to Heart.. Please.. tell me can I have your Heart close to Me.. so that I can tell YOU.. I love YOU.. I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. I want to say that I love you like I am so Crazy in Love with YOU.. Please.. How can I have your Heart close to Me.. I turn to look at the Little Piano.. it is telling me to play a tune.. telling me to touch the Key bars.. that Only it is fingers away from the Touch.. if I can only play.. If I can only write the Music.. compose a Song.. write a Music so that YOU can hear something Out of this Little Piano.. but.. I know that I can't play a tune.. I can't make a sound.. it just be so noisy in your ears.. the tunes will Not sound right which it should make you feel something very special but If I play on this Little Piano.. instead of smiling.. YOU can be angry with me instead saying.. WHY can't I play a Good music that makes you smile and makes you happy.. that is why I am telling YOU I can't play.. but the Little Piano who is in my room.. is looking at me telling me.. I want to play something for YOU.. to tell you that I love YOU.. I have the Recorder in my Hand.. and I put a tape inside the recorder.. and on the Top of the desk is the Empty Glass Jar.. inside is Your Picture.. I took your Picture and someone was able to make it pretty big.. the Picture I put inside the Glass Jar.. I can see your Beautiful Face.. only if YOU were in this room.. Only If I can have your Heart.. and Place your Heart inside the Glass Jar next to Your Picture.. I am able to tell YOU something.. I would turn to look at the Little Piano.. I would ask.. would you let me Play.. even though I would Not be able to play anything.. I can push the Play Button of the Recorder and the Instrument of a Piano.. a Professional Pianist can Play.. I would stand next to the Little Piano.. can Act like I can Play.. when YOU hear the sound of the Music coming Out of the Recorder of playing the Piano.. I would turn and I would LOOK at the Desk.. I would look at your Picture.. I would Look at the Heart.. only If I have your Heart.. I be saying to YOU.. I have written YOU a Letter.. I wrote it last Night.. I was thinking about this very night so I had to write it.. and I had to memorize what I wrote to YOU in the Letter to tell YOU.. Can YOU hear the Song.. the Instrumental of this Piano Playing.. If YOU look towards me who is standing by the Little Piano.. YOU can be pretty confused because It looks like I am playing the Piece of Music.. Yes.. my fingers are pressing into the Key Bars of this Little Piano.. but.. I have turned off the sound that comes Out of this Piano because.. the recorder is playing instead.. Can YOU hear the Music of this Piano Playing.. Please if YOU can't.. Open your ears.. Please tell me that YOU can hear Me.. Please.. open your Heart for me and listen to the Sound of this Music of Piano.. the Instrumental Playing.. I want to give you this Song.. I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. I know that YOU are hearing the Sound of this Little Piano Playing.. it is what I will say to YOU.. that I love YOU.. My Heart can't take it no more.. My fingers pressing.. hands wants to pound on this Key Bars on this Piano.. when ever I think of YOU.. when ever I want to say I love YOU.. I can hear my own Heart.. telling me It wants to beat faster.. it beats faster because I needs to say it and tell YOU that I love YOU.. as I turn to look at the desk.. Looking at the Glass Jar.. I am looking at your Picture.. and.. Only if Your Heart be placed inside.. I be crying Out Loud.. I love YOU.. you do not know what YOU have done to me but I want to say that I love YOU.. as I turn to look at the Little Piano.. I feel so sad.. I feel so happy but sad again.. because all I see is myself.. I don't see YOU.. But I needs to see YOU.. I want to see you.. I needs your Heart here with me.. so that I can tell your Heart.. I do not know How long.. but I have to say to Your Heart.. I love you.. How Long.. I will say it I love YOU.. looking at the Little Piano.. I know that It feels My Heart.. it knows My Heart because it knows my Heart.. I believe the Little Piano hears my voice.. as I am playing and touching the Key bars.. it knows that I love YOU.. knowing how much I needs to be with YOU.. but I will say.. YOU are so Far off.. WHY do you have to be so Far that I can't see YOU.. I wants to find a way where YOU can be near.. will you let me come close to YOU.. Please let me know because.. I want to take this Little Piano with Me.. and stand next to YOU.. I would turn to LOOK at you.. and I will tell YOU.. this is the Little Piano I was talking to Your About.. every Night.. I would turn to look at this Little Piano.. I feel stuffy inside.. sometimes I feel frustrated because I want to be close to YOU.. when I feel so stuffy inside.. I get close to this Little Piano.. and I would turn it on.. where when My Fingers touch the key bars.. and it presses into it.. YOU can hear the sounds of each key bar when YOU press it down.. it makes a noises.. and as my fingers touch and presses into the key bars.. I want to play you a Song.. making a Music and I would face the Wall.. Only if YOU can be right there.. Only if YOU can be that close to Me.. and I would say.. WHY do you have to be so Far.. that I can't find YOU any where.. I can't see YOU any where.. I want to tell YOU so that YOU can hear me but I know that NO matter how much I speak.. or how much my fingers press into the Key bars