Thank you for this video. You’re the one relative I relate to the most. I don’t have much to show for my life and it’s been something I’ve struggled with. I’m learning to appreciate the time I have and how I use it instead of grinding to earn more material riches. The simplicity of it is encouraging but I find myself depressed about it at the same time. The anxiety that haunts me is nearly always insecurity in my role as a mother, and/or childhood trauma that is still unresolved. I’ve been trying to figure out what motivates me to try to be a good mom, and the scary reality is that I’ve mostly been trying to not be my mom. I’ve stopped reaching out to her just to get space from that fear of becoming her and I’m starting to see my “true” (ever changing) self with my own desires of the mom I want to be instead of the mom I don’t want to be. The path forward is becoming a lot more clear. That’s what I got out of your video. Also, it reminded me of how much I enjoyed spending time with you while you were in town. I may not be your target audience but I still found a lot of value in your video. Thank you ❤️
Thank you, Rene. May I offer, I obsessively carried (and still do to some degree), that I must have 'something to show for my life' -- and at any given moment, that created suffering (depression) or a bit more space. Where does the belief come from that I have to show something? That has been a fascinating question for me. Given what I know, it makes sense you have went the route you did. It's scary, and yet you are seeing what you have been doing. With that awareness, change is possible. Whether that's to become, for yourself, the mother you always wanted to have, or something else. Beyond feeling at ease within our minds, and bodies, which will influence every word and action (then our families), what else is there to focus on while we navigate this life? I'm glad you watched. My aim is to share real time what I am experiencing, and I don't have a target audience in terms of my videos at this point. I'm making them to support me on my path forward. Part of that is letting go of the need to be liked or accepted. Opening myself up to criticism and indifference more and more. And, I'm posting them in the event they are meaningful for someone else. In this moment and this video, that's you :).
Hi Matt, we all had a great time with such a beautiful human being like you! I am very glad that you accepted the invite and let go the fear of spending time with a crazy Italian Family :-P ! We would have missed a lot of wonderful conversations with you! :-)
Hi Matt! What a touching and sensitive video, thank you. It made me reflect about the purpose of our lives and about the respect we should have for other human beings and ourselves, always. It's impressive the way you managed to change completely your life. Your story is so inspiring.
Chiara, thank you for the kind words. You know, in theory it seems so simple to always remember we are all human at the end of the day, and act accordingly. In practice, it can be so challenging, and has been for me over the years. It has been challenging for me over the years, because for so long, if I didn't "like someone", or didn't "respect someone", it was always their fault, somehow. The truth is, most of the people I've avoided, judged, and/or butted heads with were because there was something about them, that triggered something in me. Whether it was my own fear of being homeless and helpless that led to avoiding them. Or... My own judgement about how people "should" live, "should" be, "should" act, that led to me thinking I was somehow better than they...and that led to confrontation with that person or just avoiding them. Either way, I've noticed how those thoughts, feelings, and beliefs have impacted the way I treat people, and inhibited my ability to accept people for who they are, and my ability to not let others to control my emotions, which at the end of the day, only I can control those. And to take it one step further, I find for others and myself, the thought of "accepting someone for who they are" may seem that we are implying we "accept" bad behaviors... and that's not what I believe to be the case. It's more about "accepting" that is the way someone is, and it's not my job, to tell them who they should be, how they should act, or treat them poorly because of differing world views, ways of living, or the like. At the end of the day, I always ask myself why I'm acting a certain way to people, and identifying how I want to respond to that person, if at all. This could be a long conversation and much more in depth.
Thank you for sharing, when I travel I try to eat what the locals eat as much as I can but I also supplement a little by eating basic dishes like vegetables and rice, Stay healthy and be happy. Hope to see your channel grow!
Definitely. There are so many new dishes to try everywhere we go, right? The balance can be tough, but going from local cuisine to simple dishes, as you noted make the experience more enjoyable. What has been one of your favorite travel destinations, from a standpoint of the local food experience? I appreciate you taking the time to watch my videos, Rachel!
I appreciate you posing the question about how I adapt and make decisions on the go, Rachel :). As you know, being a traveler, there is no shortage of great food to enjoy along the way, but you can quickly see your energy deplete, along with your enjoyment of the trip, when not taking the time to get in some exercise. That has been my experience, anyway.
