Do you struggle with stress, anxiety, or burnout? Do you wish you had a roadmap for how to manage difficult situations so you can feel more empowered?
I'm Dr. Sharon Grossman and I specialize in helping physicians, lawyers, and 6-figure executives and entrepreneurs live their best life. They hire me to master their mindset, because most are spinning their wheels…exhausted and frustrated about the toll their work is taking on their lives. So I help them stay calm, even in situations that are seemingly scary, to effectively manage the demands on their time, and quickly bounce back from adversity so they don’t burn out. Bottomline, I empower them to break out of negative thinking patterns and fears so they can feel happy in their work and life.
Let me coach you for FREE. Sign up for your 30-minute Breakthrough Session where you will learn exactly what is keeping you stuck and get a roadmap to thrive: bookachatwithsharon.com
Updating your RAS (reticular activating system) which is the filtering net of incoming stimuli, allows you to shift at what and where: you are looking... Updating the RAS shifts your consciousness... I came across a Spanish style home... I dreamt every night of my new home, walking from room to room... This went on for 4 months. Price dropped 3 times. Long story short everything came through!💗 Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Bring yourself back to the present. No matter how simple or silly, think about why you are grateful. It could be a warm comfy blanket, it could be heat and being protected from the elements, or even food! Take a few moments to be grateful for 3 things. We sometimes forget we get to choose what we focus on. Bringing yourself back to the present now moment helps us through tumultuous times... When the Bible was being edited by the Pharisee and Sanhedrin, who later took the titles: Pope and the Council of Cardinals... They deliberately broke the Lord's prayer. Recognize that the Father wants a personal relationship with you, and he desires that you want one with him. That means... You have your part in this! Do! Your! Part! So... When you pray to the Father, remember: the words are for you to build a vision with him. In essence: Tell-A-Vision: to the Father. Let him see it all: in your mind. (100-dollar bills raining down, a pile like autumn leaves... Me: hand-in-hand with my beloved twin-flame, running around, kicking them and laughing. WOW!) 1) I'm a powerful magnet for financial abundance 2) I'm in love with myself and my life 3) I'm constantly and consistently receiving abundant amounts of money 4) I'm aligned with the vibration and frequency and tune: of LOVE 5) I'm grateful for the wealth and health that always flow into my life Be clear, get precise, aim for accuracy and FREQUENCY (pun intended!). Ask, believe, and receive. Anger. Let us deal with anger. If you are angry about something that happened three weeks ago, it's because you have a muscle in your stomach, you know the one, that is a chemical junkie... This muscle was present when that particular memory was created and stored. And it calls out that chemical signature, and forces you to re-live that moment, so it can feed, you have not been angry in a long time, you've been duped. Bamboozled. And now that you know, what are you going to do, be fake angry? As soon as you begin to feel angry about anything from the past... Stop it! Just take a look around you, and know nothing happened to you NOW, unless it actually did. And if it did, that's the only thing you can be truly angry about. Faith is simply loyalty. Loyalty to the fact that you asked, loyalty to the fact that you believed. Stay loyal, stay faithful, and you'll receive. As for the judgement room that we have all heard of, well, it may surprise you to learn that that room is in your head, and it's running constantly... Do not end your prayers with 'Amen'. To you, this has always meant the prayer has ended. And in that, you're right. It's over. End your prayers, instead, with: So Be It. So it is. This way the energy of the prayer, moves with you, into the eternal now... Tremendous way to finish at night, before bed!🖤👍😍 Thank you my creator, my ancestors, and all the angelic benevolent holy beings, for making me a believer! I'm loving my life and its sacred unfolding! Blessings to all! Peace!
I ❤ it!!! Take a sabatical! 3 years ago i had taken a 1 week silent retreat at a Montesary. It was anazing!! It got me in touch with my basic needs, After 2 days, my racing thoughts were reduced, more clear thinking , i was able to be naturally in tune with my natural sleep, excercise , hunger needs. I journaled, read my bible, observe nature, took pictures, drew, rested etc. It was so peaceful. I promiced myself when i got back home .... I would recreate myself and have a spiritual practice that was started on the retreat. Its really challenging to create new patterns. Some are still practiced and some i will go back to practicing .... So i can have balance joy and peace. Drinking water , eating healthy foods is really helpful with increasing good heslth . Ive noticed ...that when i reduced multi media,vand multintasking create burn out. Its all alot of spiritual practice. Give yourself grace and keep practicing.
What? I have needs? Thank you for that lovely reminder. I think your excercises are so helpful. I can see with practixe how emotionall healthier that id like for myself . Im the oldest of 5 ( 3 sisters and one brother) All of us have Ptsd , overexcessive sence of respinsibility, difficuly with knowing what our individual needs are, poor boundaries, struggling with coedependency and exhaustion. When you grow up like this its really hard to place yiur needs as a oririty because it feels selfish. Im trying to chage that so incan be a healthy and happy person. Taking care of yiur beeds is not selfish. Rhank you for this video. So good!!
Sad, but true. Many of us are just not aware that we have needs because for too long we put ourselves on the back burner. The good news is it's never too late to start. Glad you found the exercises helpful. This is an adjustment and it starts with self-awareness. Good luck to you.
Meeting their needs and suppressing my own, then taking that role into my adult relationships. When I found out what codependency and one way relationships is I got out of the relationship business. Got rid of all of them and surprise now I have peace in my life.
As a feeler we are seen as the motivators, the pep talk givers, and the listeners for our family and friends. The issue is when we need a shoulder to cry on, or some motivation to get through the rest of the day, we don't have any one like us to reciprocate the service we provide freely to them. We are often told we are too emotional or are weak minded, so we shut up and stuff the problem down and there the issue resides, brewing resentments and stealing our peace and genuine happiness.
Your comment really hits home. I love how you phrased it. You're so right - this is real. I appreciate you sharing it. Heather and I are working on a solution in the form of communication training for leaders, but if you have other ideas of how we can help, please let me know.
This was a fabulous podcast - so many great tips. As a 47-year-old woman, I relate to the idea that self-care was never emphasized when I was growing up. It was all about working nonstop, and then taking some time to exercise.(to lose weight) and then back to the grind stone. The concept of listening to your body or not overdoing it or finding enjoyable and fulfilling self-care options simply didn’t exist.
Thank you for sharing that and I'm so glad the podcast is helpful to you, Tracy. And if you found this helpful, there are loads more other episodes you might like here on my channel. In addition, you can find podcast episodes here: bit.ly/oylpodcast and other burnout related resources on my website: drsharongrossman.com/ Good luck!
Love this conversation! Play is key to keep us going! Mike kept referring to science that backs play…could you share specific studies? I’m for sure taking his quiz!
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So at 6:14 "the meaning that you give events" is how you translate the event for you, how it affects you, how you translate who are you from how you feel within or after the event?
lol Why just 7 minutes? You had good questions and she knows so much? I've seen other podcasts go longer. :-) You should have her back for #2/The Sequel ;-)
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my mother has been struggling with bipolar disorder, complex PTSD and eating disorder for most of her life. this causes her to be extremely depressed, i want to help her but i feel that our roles reversed
Sounds like it. As long as you can put up some boundaries and help her from that place so that you can get your needs taken care of as well, it will feel like a choice.
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Great interview Sharon! Been wanting to meet a psychologist! You video made my day! ❤Deep thought from Shelmina! Starting our success story by taking care of ourselves is the way to go!
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Grew up as a parentified child and only in my late 20’s realized this and have worked on meeting my own needs (which always took a back seat over others’ needs and wants), setting boundaries, and advocating for myself. I really want to distance myself from my parents however one already has chronic illnesses (end-stage kidney disease, loads of heart problems CAD, cardiomyopathy, had several heart attacks already) and nobody else to take care of them except us children. I find myself in a bind because on one hand I want to focus on myself for a change and I need to reparent myself and recover from codependency but on the other hand their health issues are also not a trivial thing. Sometimes I don’t know if me taking care of them is something I do out of love because I still feel guilty most of the time. Like it’s an obligation. But at the same time if they’re gone I don’t want to regret that I could’ve spent more time with them but I focused on myself. So even though I moved out years ago now I live with them again, the dynamics between us have changed and I have more power now compared to when I was a kid. But you can also say that it’s still the same, I’m still in the “carer” role and putting their needs before mine.
Paulina - believe it or not, your predicament is something that many parentified children find themselves in as adults. It's an internal conflict and there is no right answer except what's right for you. I encourage you to work with a therapist or coach to make sure you find that answer, to live life on your terms, and to find peace. You deserve it.
How to deal with it when you're an adult but every contact with your mother is still affected by it? I'm 35 and, over the years, have had to distance myself massively from my mother bc she would continue to overstep and undermine my boundaries. Yesterday, after I was friendly to her for a few days, she called me and asked if I would fly to the UK with her to see the Queen, bc she would really like to see it, but doesn't want to go alone. She gets super emotional and disregulated and it's so exhausting for me always having to be the grownup in those conversations. I feel that the older my mom gets, the more she falls into this child role. I've told her that I don't like it and need a mother that I can rely on and talk to. I usually say no to any kind of immature requests like this, but I'm still not quite free of that ugly feeling of being used and hurt. It makes me depressed and angry that she is like that. I also realized that I could have really used the support from my dad while growing up and especially in the last 15 yrs to emancipate myself from her. Unfortunately, he was never interested in helping me to grow up, has an idea about it where he gives money but no emotional support, to him, growing up and becoming happy is sth you can only achieve on your own and by yourself. He would only tell me "you got to move out from your mom's place now, you're old enough", "you should be having kids by now", "you need to get a job by the time you're 35 or you'll never make it", "you need to be able to live by yourself". It's this awful constellation that has left me with crippling anxiety and depression, feelings of utter loneliness. And I'm so fed up and tired of it.
I understand where you're coming from and my biggest tips would be this: 1. You need to reevaluate the meaning you attach to what your mother does and what you do. In 2. Regulate your nervous system and a great way to feel less triggered by mom is by undergoing EMDR therapy. The ultimate goal would be to be around your mother without her having changed, and being able to maintain your cognitive and emotional boundaries so that you no longer feel negatively impacted but can shrug it off. Hope that helps. All the best to you.
@@theburnoutdoc Wow, THANK YOU so much for your quick and helpful reply <3 I feel heard and understood. Especially the first tip seems very helpful. I have been thinking about it, I guess that I actually have my inner belief system more from my dad's side, who would always oppose to anything "crazy" like spontaneous ideas or strong emotions, yet my heart also has streaks of my mom in it. So it also challenges my own inner conflict when she acts like that. I've tried accepting that I have both sides in me, and also thinking "I do not need to take care of her", "I am allowed to just say no." I will consider this some more. Also thank you as well for the advice with EMDR therapy, I will look into it!
I keep finding this is the one major factor in my life that always messes me up. Trying to manage expectations and stay positive I think will help, but when it hits hard and my mood darkens, I feel depressed and nunb... trying hard to find a way to break out of that. Thanks for your video, will deffo bear it in mind
John, thank you for sharing that. One other thing to consider is that you may be disappointed because you don't have boundaries in place. If that is the case, check out this training I put together about boundary setting: coachingbysharon.teachable.com/p/how-to-stop-being-a-people-pleaser-set-boundaries-without-the-guilt-and-avoid-burnout