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I know it’s been 3 years since this post but I hope you get this question. I ve been married 35 years and we have raise three successful children and have not been able to rekindle our love for each other but instead we have had every unresolved issue over the 35years resurface. All while adjusting to empty nest, menopause, mid life crisis, which has caused us to drift apart and realize that we have had resentment brewing for decades. My question is how does someone in this position approach saving this marriage or accepting that it will end in divorce?
It happened to me these days that few of my family members started to debate me about politics. I don't like to get into talking about the subject because I don't do well talking on this. I am learning that usually we can tell when a political attack is coming at you. Avoid it from the beginning and interrupt and end chat by saying I will be back to you later. Let time go by for a few days then come back to talk about something else. If not it will become a problem and may end with your sibling like it ended for me with my sister and brother.
Signs of dysfunctional family 1. One is more loved; higher up 2. Manipulations, gaslighting ⛽️, not trusting their gut 3. Intimidation, threats 4. Blame, u made me do it 5. No kind communication and conversation 6. No empathy for your emotions 7. Poor boundaries: keep good ppl in, bad ppl out 8. Too rigid or too relaxed
My wife is too comfortable living in her head behind her walls. The story in her head is so strong, that any kind of reality is ignored because it justifies her isolation that she loves.
I hear your frustration. And I feel for her. Obviously I don't know the situation or your story, but let me offer a view from the other side. She may not know she doesn't love it there, but she really doesn't. From my own experience, there are layers of walls. Some she may not have access to what is inside. Wherever she is, it is known there, it feels safe. There are walls for a reason. The reason may or may not be relevant to her current situation, but there is a reason, and that is to keep her safe. Unfortunately, pushing for her to come out also will feel unsafe, and confirm for her that it is right to stay inside. It will likely feel like survival to her. I challenge you to reflect on what you could do to make things totally safe emotionally in your environment But also if and when they are, to reflect on how you may be enabling her comfort there. I'm not saying this is your fault or even your responsibility. It's likely an almost impossible situation for her, and for yourself. I know the pain I caused to my partner by being locked away. It took the very real threat of losing everything, were it was more dangerous to stay in for the unconscious walls to come down for the first time I could ever recall. There I found things I believed impossible. Keeping them down is a daily challenge, and sometimes I lose. I'm not advocating anything drastic. Just relaying my experience in the hopes that the perspective might help.
Thank you so much for this. I just lost my friend to suicide and it felt like it was my fault for not noticing the warning signs before it happened. Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️❤️ #LLJ🕊️🕊️🕊️
I've experienced it 5 times, it takes a huge toll on you emotionally, mentally, and physically. Mom in a car wreck, Sister had a blood clot, two lifelong friends to suicide, brother in a motorcycle wreck.
After exactly one year of losing Paul, husband of 68 years, everything in my heart, brain, emotions, body are all out of whack. Crying and crying. Old age is hard enough, but adding the loss of half of myself- is untellable. We were so blessed to have most of our lives together. Pain is pain, no matter how old we are.
If you were to draw your last breath today are you 100% sure that heaven would be your home? I'd like to share my best friend's story with you. Precious Memories-By Sonya Lakey Family Story Little did our family of six know that Friday evening, September 24th, 2021, would be the last night our family would be complete. We laughed together, played games, sang, and enjoyed listening as our 16-year-old son, Ethan, played the piano for us. I packed a lunch for Ethan for a church mountain hike he was going on the following day. My mother (who was visiting from out of state) and I woke early with Ethan on Saturday morning. He hugged me and smiled, never pulling away or rushing me. He got in the car, waved, said he'd see me later and he loved me. It was hard to watch my "new driver" heading out on his own that morning. As Ethan pulled out of the gate, I turned to my mother and said, "It's just so hard letting go." Little did I know how much "letting go" I was really doing. That was the last time I saw Ethan. He did not make it home that evening. That afternoon, a friend tried to contact my husband, leaving an urgent message to call him back. He tried several times to return the call to no avail. As we were preparing supper, an overwhelming feeling of deep concern for Ethan filled my heart. I quietly blinked back tears. I glanced out the window, half expecting to see a police officer pull up to the house, but no one arrived. However, within a few minutes, a patrol car DID pull into the driveway. In my heart, I feared the worst. My husband and I went out to meet the officer, who confirmed our fears. Hesitantly, he told us our son had fallen off of a bluff and had succumbed to his injuries. Our hearts were crushed; they still are. Yet, in all of our brokenness, deep, continual grief and loneliness, our family has such a blessed Hope and assurance that we will see our dear son and brother again. You see, when Ethan was a young boy, he was saved; he put his faith in Jesus alone to forgive his sins and to take him to Heaven when he died. He realized some very important truths from the Bible that he would want to share with you. His Story Everyone is a sinner. Sin is any violation of God’s Law. God is holy, just and righteous, and He cannot allow sin in His presence. Ethan realized that he - like all of us - had sinned; and his sin separated Him from God. “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God; ” (Romans 3:23) “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” (Romans 5:12) He understood that, because of his sin, he deserved to spend eternity in Hell. “For the wages of sin is death;” (Romans 6:23a) [Wages: price] “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8) Ethan believed that Jesus, God’s Son, paid the price for all sin when He died on the cross - because His sinless sacrifice was the only thing that could satisfy the just demands of a righteous, holy God. Jesus was buried in a borrowed tomb, but He arose the third day, triumphant over sin, death, and Hell. Jesus is alive today! “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9) Ethan was sorry for his sin, repented (turned), and received by faith the free gift that God offered to him. “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13) “...but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23b) Because of this great salvation, Ethan lived his life serving Jesus. He worked hard to spread this Good News to the world. He is alive in Heaven with Jesus today; and because of this great HOPE in Christ, we know we will see him again soon - not because he was a great kid, but because of his faith in the great Saviour! “And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.” (John 10:28) Your Story What about you? What if you had fallen to your death that day - What if you were to die today? Where will you spend eternity - Heaven or the Lake of Fire? There will not be any parties in the Lake of Fire. It is a place of eternal torment for those who reject God's Son. The Word of God is very clear that there is only One Way to Heaven. “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6) We did not know that Ethan would step into eternity that day; however, because he put his faith in Jesus alone for his salvation, Ethan was ready to go. Some day - perhaps today - you will take your last breath here on earth, and you will step into eternity. Where you spend eternity is determined by what you do with Jesus Christ. Will you accept Him or reject Him? You are not promised another day or another breath. Eternity begins soon - Are you ready? “...Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…” (Acts 16:31b) “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13) “(...behold, now is the day of salvation.)” (2 Corinthians 6:2c) ********************************************************* If you need more help or if you would like to send a word of encouragement to the family, please go to: facebook.com/GITM-Foundation-113997824650357/ If you don't have a church to attend, we would love for you to join us in person @ Liberty Faith Bible Church in Norwood, Mo. every Sunday morning central time 11:00 A.M., Sunday evening 7:00 P.M., and Wednesday evening 7:00. P.M. where you will hear sound, biblical preaching from God's Word as well as uplifting, godly music. Or you can join our livestream family at: libertyfaith.net Facebook: Reg Kelly-Table In The Wilderness Sermon audio: Liberty Faith Church Pastor Reg Kelly RU-vid: Liberty Faith Church Reg Kelly sermons (not livestream, but recorded)
What if the other spouse goes in and starts lying right off the bat? Can a therapist tell that? What if it comes out in the counseling that there's something deeper going on with the other spouse than what meets the eye, can the therapist suggest individual therapy?
My marriage of seven years came crashing down before my very own eyes, I was already giving up on it before coming across (Eliana Zaituna Hernandez) who helped in restoring and strengthening back my marriage.
My mom died suddenly one day. I had spoken to her only a few hours before her heart just stopped beating. I miss her so terribly. It was difficult to go home and bury her and see the clothing setting out for her trip to come to see me.
There is no surviving an affair. The day my wife told me about cheating is the day I walked out. She is now my ex wife. She tried to explain but I told her I wasn't interested in listening to her excuses. I still love her but now the trust has gone there can never be anything between us again. Thankfully my employer operates globally and they agreed to post me abroad. I will never speak to her again as she broke my heart beyond repair.
In my experience couple's therapy doesn't work because there's no such things as an impartial couple's counsellor. I say that because I don't believe such a thing as an impartial human exists.
Thank you so very much for this video! My husband died suddenly and unexpectedly exactly 3 months after we experienced a house fire and were displaced from our home! I have experienced all of the things you spoke about! It has been 17 months since he died and I am slowly starting to feel some air so to speak around my brain. I am not the same person at all after all of this but I am learning about the new me. Again many thanks! Could you also address being younger and a spouse suddenly dies? It seems to be an assumption that this mainly happens to older people so the support isn't as available for those of us who are still working etc.
Hi I’m so sorry I can feel your hurt with you! Tomorrow will be 7 weeks, I lost the absolute love of my life we were connected as one being and we were best friends. He was only 56 years old, active & very healthy. March 10th we had a normal day. We spoke thruout the day as always then we came home from work & I cooked dinner, we ate and went to a movie (the movie was so bad we left after 1/2 hour) went home took our dog out, had a snack watched some tv worked on our computers a bit and went to bed. In the middle of the night he woke up & turned the light on while he was standing up, I was sound asleep so it startled & confused me. He was calm but he knew something wasn’t right. The rest I can’t even speak of out loud or even write down as it was so tragic & traumatizing. I can only say he suffered a heart attack & heart attacks aren’t like they look on tv. They are much worse. I tried to give him CPR and compressions I’m still in complete shock and I’m so shattered it’s indescribable. We had a one in a million kind of bond & the loss is unbearable. I have ran a business for over 30 years - always successful & able to work but I’m not even able to speak right now. I can’t eat, sleep or function at any level. I can’t fathom going into any kind of financial ruin. I don’t wanna lose our home I can’t even bare to think of having to pack his stuff up. I haven’t moved anything of his yet. I am fortunate or unfortunate. I guess which ever way to look at it to have thousands of pictures of us, and the only comfort I have is when I am looking at our pictures or videos other than that I am completely destroyed. I hope you’re having some comfort or peace but I’m guessing you’re not. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. If you want to reply and tell me your story I’d be happy to listen.
@@crystalclune I’m so sorry for your loss. We just lost my dad about two weeks ago and he was young and healthy. My mom is still in total shock. Just want to send you prayers of comfort. It’s such a hard thing.
I lost my beloved mother unexpectedly on October 6 2022 and I'm heartbroken 💔😢. There are days that I feel good, then there are days that I feel bad. Is been really hard.
All the losses I have experienced have been exposed to have been expected. However, 6 weeks ago my wife and I were in a horrific car crash. If it wasnt for her quick reactions, I would be dead or worse very seriously injured. But she paid the ultimate price . Seeing her in that condition will be something I will never forget and being unable to do anything, although it happened so quick will always haunt me I think. Useful video, thx.
I'm feeling that today, my first appointment is this afternoon. I asked the husband to go with me (I've gone to counseling for myself before) and he agreed several times but only got serious about it after I shared that I'm angry at myself for putting up with the situation for so long. I hope you found some healing, and I hope I do, too.
We can’t afford it. And I am just so lost right now. Looking endlessly for videos we can do at home as if the therapist online can talk back to us. I feel stupid. Good luck to you ladies.
It’s been almost 3 months that my beautiful chocolate drop daughter 18 in July a freshman at UC college her and her roommate was hit walking across the crosswalk and a teen driver whom stole a car hit both her roommate survived by unfortunately my daughter didn’t survived her injuries. 😢 Parent Worst Nightmare Right whom would have thought that your send kid off to college they would died from a car crossing the street! My heart is forever broken 💔
