Oink Oink.. YOU.. and I started to feel like maybe the Letter I wrote to YOU did Not get to your address.. How Long must I wait.. if there is NO answer on the Other side.. How long must I wait for an answer.. are you ever going to tell Me or am I suppose to just guess by Now that YOU are Not going to write me anything.. every night I would Open the front Door.. the MAIL man has been coming pretty Late.. so I would walk to the mail Box.. another Letter I wrote.. putting into the envelope.. just waiting for him to come as I wanted to give YOU another letter.. the mail man comes.. and I am standing by the Mail Box giving him the envelope with the Letter inside.. he smiles and tells me that He saw YOU.. and he gave the Letter to YOU.. and Another Letter will be given to YOU again.. so I would smile.. knowing that this is the answer I wanted to hear.. that I wanted to hear that YOU are truly receiving these letters.. it is Not easy to write YOU a Letter.. takes me a lot of hours to write just to show YOU.. to tell YOU that I love YOU.. and How much I miss YOU too.. the mail man tells me.. YOU are so Beautiful.. I would pulled the Picture and show the mail Man the Picture of YOU.. and He looks at It.. looks at the picture.. looks at YOU.. tells me it is YOU.. the woman who received the first letter.. it is the same person in that picture but tells me.. YOU are so much more beautiful in person.. picture is nothing compared to YOU when looking at you in person.. I wanted to see.. I wanted to go with the mail man.. to see How beautiful YOU look.. what does this Mail man means.. but of course.. I know that I have to just wait for YOU.. I don't want to go yet.. as I hand him the envelope.. with the Letter written inside for YOU.. He takes it with HIM.. I am smiling.. I am in such a great joy because as long as YOU receive the Letter.. it means everything to Me.. all I want to hear.. YOU know how much I love YOU.. all I want to know.. How much I need YOU and how much I miss YOU.. that YOU are doing just fine and that YOU know who is the person behind the ONE who is writing you these Love Letters.. all I want to hear.. YOU know it is Me who be loving YOU all along and never stopped loving YOU till this very day and that I will Not stop loving YOU.. as I would turn around.. LOOKING at the house.. I would walk to the front door.. open the door.. as long as I get this chance to write to YOU by telling YOU.. that I will keep on telling YOU that I love YOU.. I have not lose any hope but will continue to always love YOU.. and I would open the front door.. closing behind the door.. I would walk into the room.. looking at the chair.. looking at the desk.. I would sit on this chair.. pulling out the piece of paper.. with the pencil and eraser next to the paper.. and I would pull out your picture.. looking at YOU through this Picture.. I would say.. I can't stop.. because the More I see YOU.. the More I want to tell YOU that I love YOU.. why can't I stop loving YOU.. why can't I just stop.. but when I see your picture.. YOU touch my Heart and my soul to death.. that I needs to tell YOU what is in my heart and in my soul.. in my mind.. that I needs to be with YOU.. when can I see YOU.. I heard from the Mail Man.. YOU are so much beautiful in person.. so amazingly Beautiful that it takes Your Breathe away and leaves YOU puzzled.. means speechless.. unable to speak because.. that is HOW beautiful YOU are.. so Beautiful that it amazes YOU to share.. YOU are so Beautiful.. so Beautiful I needs to be with YOU and just can't let YOU go and I wanted to tell YOU.. I love YOU.. over and over again.. I still love YOU..I am very close to the Log Cabin House.. Finally.. I have been waiting to get Out of the city life.. as I stop.. I am able to see the Snow flakes falling from the Sky.. as I unlock the Door.. and I enter the Small Log Cabin Home.. as I look into the Small Two bed room Home.. I am wondering.. why did I even buy a House with two rooms.. I have no one coming over.. but I know that If I prepare the place.. Maybe.. some one will show Up.. I have never met the person who use to Live in this Small Log Cabin house.. as I walk into One of the rooms.. There is a Desk.. I wonder why someone has left this Desk Behind.. something stops me before I turn to walk away.. I see something on the TOP of the Desk.. what is It.. I am wondering.. what is It.. SO I would walk closer to the Desk.. there is a Written Note.. and Next to the Note is a Picture.. of course I can only see the back of the Picture.. I am wondering.. maybe it must be the Picture of the Person who use to live in this Small Log Cabin House.. But why would some one leave a precious Gift behind.. if I lived in this House.. I know for sure I will Not leave anything special.. or Precious to me behind.. But.. should I turn the Picture over to see who this Person is.. I am standing there.. thinking of.. but I know that this is Not my picture.. WHY would I turn it over to look if it is Not for Me.. I am sure.. maybe the Person was in a rush.. and has forgotten to take this Picture.. but.. WHY would YOU write a Note for me.. I know that the written Note.. it is telling me.. giving me an instruction.. but why would you tell me something.. I can just live whatever I want.. I see the Note Next to the Picture.. Both are facing where I cannot see.. as I would stop.. maybe I should take a Look.. must be very important if YOU have written for the New Home Owner.. which I have purchased this Small Log Cabin Home from YOU.. I have never met YOU.. but Of course I do remember before the Contract.. YOU called me on the Phone.. and Got a chance to listen to Your Beautiful Voice.. Now.. I am very curious.. YOUR voice.. truly felt like I was listening to an Angel.. I know that If you sang a SONG.. I bet it would melt my Heart like the Snow Flakes.. I would stand Out side.. before I came to the DOOR.. to Unlock.. I would LOOK Up to the sky.. My hand opens.. I would watch the Falling snow flakes.. when It touched my hand.. it just melted and maybe Your Voice.. if YOU sang to Me.. My Heart can melt the way the Snow Flakes can melt into my hands.. I was smiling because I been living in apartment for a Long time.. just paying rent to rent monthly.. But.. Now.. able to purchase a new Home.. Out here in the Country side.. walking and climbing on the mountains.. just enjoying the fresh cold air as I would be walking through the Snow.. never felt so Alive in my life.. But Now.. I am here.. inside this Small Log Cabin Home.. and I just walked into a ROOM.. YOU did not take the desk.. there is a Picture laying on the TOP of the desk face down.. with a written Note facing down.. I am just wondering.. I remember when I picked UP the Phone.. and hearing your voice on the Other side.. on the Other line.. Your Voice.. it truly touched my Heart.. I begin to wonder more about YOU because of this Sensational touch.. Your Voice moved my Heart.. I felt it kick inside of Me.. and never felt that way before.. so I would start wondering.. I wonder How YOU would look.. as YOU were so happy to sell the House and even telling me Congratulation on the purchase of the New Home.. as I would share with YOU how I lived in rents all my Life.. but able to get a house means everything to me.. giving me a great deal in the purchase.. of course I wanted to ask YOU.. if YOU can sing.. because I wanted to know if YOU can sing.. can YOU sing a song so that I can listen to Your voice with my Heart opened.. but of course I never asked.. YOU probably think I am a crazy person.. as I am standing by the desk.. My hand grabs the Picture.. I wanted to turn it over.. I wanted to see the person who I just spoke with ON the Phone.. YOUR voice.. I just want to hear again.. can I listen to Your Voice.. would you let me call you on the Phone so that I can listen.. My Heart wants to listen to Your Voice again.. before I want to ask YOU.. I want to know how you look.. why are you so Nice.. why are you so kind to me.. I want to know who YOU are.. WHY would you leave this Picture behind if YOU have never met me.. if YOU have never seen me in person.. why leave me Your Precious gift.. Your Special gift.. I am nothing but a stranger to YOU.. what if I am a weird person.. some crazy person.. would YOU not be afraid of Me.. As I grab the Picture and turn to LOOK at it.. I see YOU sitting.. and My Heart jumps.. My Heart skips missing that Beat.. Just like Your Voice.. soft and beautiful.. I see your picture.. I see YOU.. YOU are so Beautiful too.. YOU are so Lovely.. feels like YOU can take my breathe way.. then what happens to my Breathe if you take it from Me.. what are you doing to me Now.. WHY leave this Picture behind and when I see this Picture.. I can feel my Breathe.. it wants to be released from Me.. I can't breathe.. my eyes wants to say I can't breathe because YOU are so Beautiful.. as I am looking at the Picture of YOU.. YOU are sitting down.. and I am wondering what is it that YOU are holding.. Why are you holding a Vase.. is it a vase for flowers.. I am not sure why YOU are leaving this Picture with Me.. what does it means.. why are you showing me this Picture for.. I have no clue.. I have no idea.. but why are you letting me see this picture.. and making my Heart to say I want to cry.. I have never met you before.. But How is this possible for Me.. why do I feel like I want to love YOU.. please tell me how can this be true because I have never met you before.. as I am looking at your arms holding this vase.. why is it empty.. are YOU not suppose to put something into that Vase.. it is an empty Vase Your hands are holding.. Please.. OH Please tell me what is the meaning of this because I want to know.. I have no clue.. I have no idea why you are showing me this.. I don't see any empty Vase.. but only this Picture.. with a Note.. so I
Oink Oink.. Where are the Keys.. I look at the Glass Jar and YOUR HEART.. I see the Heart Makes a Move.. I sit there.. Two Lines falls from me Eyes.. ME hand TOUCH the Chest.. DOK DOK DOK.. Oink Oink.. I am sitting and next to Me is the Basket.. Full of Flowers.. I am holding the Glass jar.. Looking down.. It is Empty Glass Jar.. I feel so Sad.. where are YOU.. Where are you My Love.. I miss YOU.. if You are Not with me Right now.. How about Imagining that YOU are Near.. I look down.. my two eyes Closes.. I am sitting.. the Glass jar has a Heart.. It is Your Heart inside.. and I want YOU to come and see.. See me and Your heart.. the Door Opens and I hear the Foot steps and stops.. I am looking down the Glass Jar.. and I say.. I am holding.. Can YOU see that I am holding.. there is a Heart inside.. Am I holding Your Heart.. will you tell me that I am doing the right Thing.. I want to have this Heart.. I want to hold it like this Forever.. Will you let me have Your Heart.. Because I love YOU.. I love YOU and I love Your Heart.. Only my wish is that YOU can give me the answer.. Please tell me that YOU are letting me to Love Your heart.. WILL you accept my Love.. can YOU receive that I want to fall in Love with YOU.. that I can start to love You until Now and Forever.. Please tell me that YOU are truly letting me to love Your Heart.. I am not asking for anything else.. But Only One.. It is Just Your Heart.. Now YOU sit next to me.. Is it really You.. I want Your Heart.. but is it really YOU.. let me have Your Heart.. I want Your Heart so that I can love YOU.. if I can't Love Your Heart.. there is No point of loving YOU.. because I want Your heart first.. Look at this Glass jar.. DO you see what I see.. I see A Heart.. SO beautiful because it is YOU.. Your Heart is so Lovely.. so beautiful.. Let me please Hold Your Heart.. I can't hold Your Heart because it is inside this Glass jar.. That is why I am asking YOU.. can YOU unlock.. give me your Heart.. take Your Heart and give it to Me.. let me please have and hold.. and to Love.. I am only asking YOU for a Permission so that I can love your heart.. why won't YOU let me Hold Your Heart.. WHY is there a wall between us.. why can't you Unlock so that YOU can give me your heart yourself.. Why do I have to just sit here and only thing I can do is looking through this Glass.. I do not want to look through this glass.. I don't want to just hold this Glass jar.. Do you know that I am much more driven then this.. that I want more.. I want more of it then just this.. I want the whole.. Your Heart.. if YOU know my intentions.. if you know how much I love You.. is it because YOU don't love me.. is it because YOU don't trust me.. is it because I am a stranger who only gives you that distance vibe.. BUT I am not like that.. you should know that I can be tender and very loving.. I can love you better than anyone else.. I can love you where YOU will say I do.. only if you can give me a chance.. give me a chance so that I can prove to you I am much more than this.. I see YOU stand Up.. I just can't believe.. are you leaving Me.. did I say something wrong that made you feel like you want to walk away from me.. why are you leaving when YOU came this close.. please don't go.. I have been waiting for you all this time.. and Now you want to leave.. you want to open that door and walk off from me.. then tell me what did I say that wants to make you leave.. I only want your heart.. why do you have to make it this hard on me.. don't go.. please don't go because I love you.. I grab Your hand.. Please.. don't go.. why are you hiding your face from me.. why can't you look into my eyes and tell me that you don't love me.. why can't you show me your real face to me.. don't go.. wait.. what have I done that makes you want to leave.. don't go.. don't leave me.. the hand pushes my hand away.. I see you open the door and walks away.. My Hand beats my Chest.. and Hits and hits.. WHY do you leave me.. I was so close right.. but I know that being close is nothing because this is what I get.. I want YOU.. I want Your heart.. Give me a chance.. YOU don't even give me a chance to love you.. then WHY do you have to push me away.. make me ache.. WHY.. I am hurt.. WHY.. I am hurting right Now.. WHY do you hurt me for.. I am only asking for One thing.. Just Your Heart.. DID I ever ask for YOUR love.. but if you just leave your heart with me.. at least I can try to revive Your Heart so that YOUR HEART can say something.. I just can't believe You are gone.. WHY do you have to hurt Me for.. WHY am I such a Fool.. all I need is Your Heart.. I open My two eyes.. I look down.. I only see the empty Glass Jar.. I am going to feel it with my tears.. I want Your heart.. I need your heart.. As I am sitting Down.. Holding the Glass Jar.. My tears starts to run down.. DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP.. hits and goes inside the Glass Jar.. My tears are telling me that I am missing YOU.. that I love YOU and I only want YOU.. I need you and I want Your Heart.. WHY did you have to leave.. bring such and the Door Opens.. The doctor looks at the Empty Glass jar.. and sees My tear drops.. I am aching Inside.. I just can't take it anymore.. and I am hurting right Now.. I want to be with Her.. and you can see that I am sick.. dying inside.. Can you please give me some Pills.. maybe these Pills can help me to calm me down.. feels like a storm inside of me.. waves crashes into my Own Heart.. The Doctor walks closer and stops.. I am so sorry that I am showing this side of me.. I have been loving her for a Long Time.. I have been waiting and waiting but I hear no answers.. I do not hear any words but is it just me.. am I going crazy.. am I going nuts.. I am wondering what is wrong with me
WHAT IS wrong with my Heart.. why is my Heart Acting up like this.. I came here to get me a treatment.. so that I can heal from this pain.. pain of loving for a Long time.. HOW long.. How Long do I must Love.. How long do I must wait.. Tell me doctor.. How long does it last for Love to Stop.. Can YOU do something.. can you help my Heart to stop the beatings inside of me.. as long as My heart keeps on beating.. I know I be still loving her.. I love YOU my Love.. I love You.. I want her to know.. even through all this time.. I don't give up that easily.. I just don't give up.. I won't give up because I want her heart.. But doctor.. DO you see this Glass Jar.. Look through this Glass.. I don't see a Heart.. I came here so that I can put Her heart inside.. so that I can take this Glass jar home.. so that I can start loving Her Heart.. can you show me where I can get Her Heart.. Help me to put her Heart inside her.. Even if she is Not with me.. but her Heart.. at least that I know that she will come close.. so Doctor.. Help me to find her Heart.. Help me to find her heart.. where are YOU My Love.. Where are YOU.. I want Your Heart.. I need Your heart.. so there is a step closer for you to come near me.. the Doctor sits next to Me.. and I look down the Glass Jar.. I see a heart.. Now I am very very confused.. I am wondering whose heart is this.. is this Your Heart.. I am holding.. and there is a heart.. I turn to look at the doctor.. Whose heart is this.. Is this Your Heart.. or is it my Heart.. I don't want to hold My Heart.. I want to hold Your Heart.. but whose heart is this.. tell Me.. is this Your Heart.. I lift UP the Glass jar.. Whose Heart are YOU.. did YOU come from me or is it YOU.. I turn to look at the doctor.. I just can't believe.. I see YOU.. I love YOU.. Is it really YOU.. tell me that this is a Dream comes True.. can I tell YOU this.. I love YOU.. How can YOU be a doctor.. OH YEAH.. I am the One with the problem.. the Problem is that I want Your heart.. SO did you come to tell me that YOU are giving me Your heart.. then whose Heart am I holding right Now.. I want your heart.. I need Your Heart.. I love your Heart.. I look at Your.. who is sitting next to me.. If this is my Heart inside this Glass Jar.. will YOU take it with YOU.. can we switch.. Can YOU Give me your heart.. I want YOU.. but I want Your Heart too.. I want everything about YOU.. I want YOU as whole.. as the One who I love.. I want to tell YOU that YOU are the best has happened to me.. why did you take so long to show Up now.. WHY did you not come closer before.. why couldn't I tell YOU these words of Mine from the heart.. that I love YOU.. why did YOU take so Long.. I been through a lot just to wait for YOU to get to me now.. I been waiting.. I have been waiting over and over.. Been waiting time and time again for this day.. WHY am I holding this Glass Jar with a heart.. YOU did not answer my question.. WHOSE Heart is this.. Whose heart.. Am I holding My Heart.. there is NO need for me to be doing that.. I am sick and tired of holding my heart.. Please give me Your heart.. Give me your heart.. SO that I can take Your Heart with me and I can love Your heart.. I will speak to your heart.. I will even sing To your heart.. I will kiss.. and keep on kissing your heart and tell Your Heart.. I love You.. I love YOU.. I love you.. I will never stop loving YOU but keep on loving YOU.. even you can get sick and tired of me telling your heart.. I love you.. but I will say I love you over and over again.. I look.. two hands holds the Glass Jar.. and I see YOU holding the glass jar with the heart.. my tears starts to fall down from my eyes.. Is this real.. are you holding My Heart.. are you accepting my heart.. are you receiving my Love.. can I keep on loving YOU and tell YOU how Much I love you.. will YOU not get tired of me keep telling YOU that I love you.. but I do truly love YOU.. as I look.. YOU grab a Glass jar.. Inside is a heart.. has Bow on the top.. and YOU put it into my lap.. and my arms wrap around it.. I can't breathe.. I can't even speak.. leaving me speechless.. are you sure you want to do this.. are you really giving me this Heart.. is this Your Heart.. am I holding Your heart.. tell me that this is real and that this is true.. I look down.. I smile.. and I say.. I love YOU.. looking down.. I look at your heart.. I say.. I love YOU.. I love your heart.. so beautiful.. can I touch Your heart.. How about the Bow on top.. can I touch Your heart.. can I feel how Your heart Feels.. why do I love Your Heart.. why do YOU keep On making me to Love Your heart.. so beautiful.. WHY are you so beautiful.. so beautiful that Word get clutter from my lips.. I am wondering if this is Only an Imagination.. is it only me who is dreaming or wishing because I want this dreams.. this wish to come true.. I want Your Heart.. it can have a tiny bow too.. be so cute and lovely but no matter what.. I will Love Your heart.. keep On loving YOUR HEART whatever you put.. as long as it is YOUR HEART.. I will love YOU.. I will love your heart and will never stop but keep on loving you.. I see you.. the Doctor get UP.. holding the glass jar and walking off.. Opens the Door and disappears.. I am sitting down.. my two eyes looks down.. next to me is the basket with full Flowers.. the Sun Flowers.. I am looking down.. the Glass jar is empty.. I see NO heart.. I just want You here.. All I want is Your Heart.. give me Your heart because I want it.. I am walking.. And I stop.. Start to walk again.. Holding a basket.. Walking and I stop.. One hand is A Flower.. Looking at the Flower.. My Lip slides to smile.. I put the Flower into the basket.. Other hand is holding.. I look and I am thinking Of YOU.. I want to give YOU this Flower.. Now with many flowers inside the Basket.. I am looking at the Dozen of Flowers in the Basket.. I want to give you this basket.. Full of Flowers.. It is Me Sunflowers.. I want to see YOU smile.. I want to tell YOU.. when I look at these Flowers.. Picking them in the Field.. One by One as I pick up to put into the basket.. It is because I want to tell YOU.. I love YOU.. and that I am so Sorry for Loving YOU.. WHY am I so Sorry.. Before the Sun Flowers get to YOU.. WHO knows where I would Be.. I want to tell YOU.. without YOU.. I feel my heart falling apart.. I feel like I cannot go without YOU.. I need YOU.. I want you.. But I want YOU to Love Me.. When WILL you love Me.. Will you ever Love Me.. I am wondering.. Pondering as I stop.. Looking down.. I see a Sun Flower.. I look at the Sun Flower looking at me.. and I whisper.. TELL Her.. Tell YOU.. I love YOU.. and
I be missing YOU just too much.. As I would walk with the basket in my hands.. and I stop.. There is a Window Glass in front of me.. and I look.. at the distance I see YOU.. My heart.. WILL you stop Pounding Hard inside.. WILL you please Stop Beating.. Will you Stop.. I put one hand in my Chest.. WHAT is going inside of me Chest.. I feel my Heart.. it would Not stop beating.. it keeps ON beating.. I ask.. MY hand taps lightly to Stop.. But my eyes keeps ON looking at you from the distance.. I am losing my breathe.. I can't stop looking.. My eyes would not Stop.. It hurts inside so much.. I am aching in my Heart.. WHY am I hurting so Bad.. WHY can't my Heart just stop.. I try to control myself.. But my Heart just keeps On beating.. YOU take My Breathe Away.. YOU take My Breathe away.. I can't breathe.. I want my Heart to Stop beating.. Because it just hurts looking at YOU.. YOU are so Beautiful.. WHY are you so Beautiful.. I wish that I can have YOU because.. YOU be looking so Good.. If I can't have you.. I rather want My Heart to stop Beating.. at least I do not need to breathe.. If I lose my breathe.. then there is NO life in me.. No more suffering in this pain.. this pain attack of wanting YOU so Bad.. wanting to Love YOU.. I want my heart to crack.. to Stop.. TO stop beating.. to stop moving so that I do not have to suffer loving YOU for too long.. I am looking at YOU.. and from the distance.. I put one hand on the Glass Window.. Asking.. WILL you come a little Closer.. Please come.. I want to see YOU a bit Closer.. I want to show YOU something.. to tell YOU something.. to whisper into your ears.. to tell YOU.. How much I have missed YOU.. I have missed you so much that I wanted to keep on crying.. crying for missing YOU.. and wanting to see YOU so Bad.. I want to give you a basket.. Inside this Basket there is A lot of Flowers.. waiting to tell YOU something.. to tell YOU.. each has its expression that comes from my heart.. that I want to give YOU one by One.. to tell YOU through the giving.. I love YOU.. One Sun flower.. if this One Sun flower do not make you Smile.. How about two Sun Flowers.. Until Each Sun Flower is given to YOU.. maybe by the last One.. the last Sun Flower may do its magic.. TO see YOU Smile.. and that smile means everything to me.. tells me.. at least.. A flower can make you smile.. IF I cannot make you smile.. But bring tears and sadness to YOU.. How about the Sun Flowers.. they are only to show YOU.. to tell YOU My heart.. My heart saying.. I love YOU.. I am looking through the Window Glass.. I am only looking at YOU from the distance.. WHY are you keeping the distance.. apart.. WHY don't you come a little closer.. I want to see YOUR beautiful Face.. I want to take a Picture of YOU.. so I can keep YOU in my heart.. Not scaring you away.. But close to MY heart.. Please come Closer.. I want to show YOU something.. I want to tell YOU something.. to let YOU know something from my heart.. I am sitting On the Cliff.. Looking at your Picture.. I am weeping.. Sobbing.. my tears flowing down.. hitting your Picture.. I want to see YOU.. I want to feel YOU.. I want to touch YOU.. hold you near.. I want to feel the warmth.. how about hearing your heart beat.. will it be the same sound as Mine.. My hand hitting my Chest.. DOK DOK DOK DOK.. Why do I have to miss YOU.. I want to see YOU near.. why do YOU have to be so far.. WHY can't you understand my heart.. why can't YOU see right through me.. I want YOU.. I want YOU near.. I need YOU near me.. looking at your Picture.. I just can't stop looking at your picture.. It is killing me deep side of being so far away.. tell me WHY can't you be near.. Do you not feel the same as I am.. can you not see what I am going through.. WHY is it that I am dealing with this So much.. WHY do I have to feel this way about you.. I look down.. on the side there is the Bottle.. the Top is already Opened. One hand holding Your Picture.. I miss YOU.. I miss YOU right Now.. I want to be with YOU.. I want YOU on my side for ever.. I want to Love YOU.. How can I love you if there is a Distance from us.. and Only thing that I can say is That I miss YOU all the time.. the Other hand grabs the Bottle.. I open my mouth.. Chug Chug Chug Chug.. On the other side is the basket.. with Dozen of Sun Flowers.. AM I going to be like these Flowers next to me.. They are dying slowly.. and this is How I feel inside.. because I cannot be with YOU.. But I do.. I do want to be with YOU.. I want to give you all these Flowers.. every day I can fill up the basket full of Flowers.. to tell YOU.. and I speak into these Sun Flowers.. I love You.. I will whisper to each one as I am handing down One to YOU.. THIS IS because I love YOU.. I grab the Bottle.. Open my Mouth Wide.. CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG.. I place the Bottle Down.. I want YOU.. looking at the Moon.. CAN YOU Please tell HER.. tell Her How Much I love YOU.. look.. I am sitting on this Cliff.. with these Flowers.. These flowers so not belong to me.. but it belongs to someone else.. it belongs To you.. Holding UP.. I am looking at Your Picture.. YOU are so Beautiful.. Like these SUN FLOWERS in the basket.. YOU are so beautiful.. and YOU are so Lovely.. but what More can I do.. I feel so useless and worthless because all I can do is tell YOU.. I love YOU.. but that is the only thing I can say to YOU.. I grab the Bottle in my hand.. Open my Mouth wide.. CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG.. And put the Bottle down.. When will this be Over.. when will I stop missing YOU.. I want to be bold.. I want to have courage to say.. and to tell YOU.. how much I love YOU.. I want to hold YOUR hand.. Hold it tight and Kiss Your Lip in the moon light.. and I want to wrap my arms around YOU and letting YOU get close.. I want to hear your heart beat pounding and beating for me.. just the way YOU are able to feel and hear mine.. I want to hold your hand.. letting you know that Once I grab hold on.. I will never let YOU go
I wonder if I can Hold that Heart.. can I wrap My both arms around that Big Heart.. Put my lips and Kiss the Heart.. I want to Hold that Heart.. Feel this Heart.. I want to HOLD it.. I want the Heart.. How can I get to that Heart.. Will you please Answer this Question.. I want the Heart.. Tell Me.. How can I get to that Heart.. And Looks at me.. Me finger points and Touch the Glass Jar.. Pointing to YOUR Heart.. I am Not sure How.. But what I do know for Sure.. I am going to get YOUR heart.. Does Not matter how Long the Time it will take me.. BUT I want Your Heart.. I want your heart.. I turn to Look at Me Heart.. Can you go and try to Find the Key.. I am sure there must Be a key laying around because IF there is a Lock.. Must be a Key to that Lock.. I turn and Looking.. Finger points and touches the glass Jar.. I want to tell Your Heart.. I have been waiting for YOU for a Long Time.. I have been waiting and waiting.. Still be waiting for Your Heart.. Your Heart looks so Good.. Your Heart looks so beautiful.. WHY is YOUR heart so Beautiful.. yes.. I want to hold Your Heart into my Hands.. I want to press My ear to Hear.. TO Hear the beating.. the beating of Your Heart.. Only way for me to hear your heart Beat and to Touch and to Feel your heart and to HOLD YOUR HEART.. Tell me.. where is the Key.. if you can please answer this One question.. It is the Word Key.. Only if I can unlock and Open the door.. I know for sure I can hold your Heart into My Hands.. I will be very very very very gentle.. and No.. I will tell YOU.. I miss YOU.. I truly miss YOU because I love YOU.. I have been holding inside for a Long time.. and I believe that the TIME is right for tell YOU.. I miss YOU.. and I want YOU close in my life.. SO that I can hold YOU.. and kiss YOU.. and tell YOU.. whisper that I love YOU in your ears.. BUT before I can tell YOU all these things.. I need Your Heart first.. I will Promise I will Not hurt Your Heart.. TELL me where are the key.. why is it so hard to find this One key.. that One key which is the way to OPEN.. for my hands to hold Your Heart.. I want to Hold your Heart so that I can tell Your Heart.. I love YOU.. how many times DO I need to tell YOU this.. Only to Your Heart.. I want to tell YOUR Heart.. I love You.. I love you so much that there are nights.. I just want to cry.. holding my pillow.. arms wrap around it.. I am squeezing it tight.. thinking that It is YOU.. Balling like a baby.. waterfall tear drops showers.. I am holding me Pillow tight.. Just wishing.. I am wishing so much these days because YOU drive me crazy.. I feel like.. am I becoming a Zombie.. or am I okay or Not.. I would lay down.. Me heart keeps ON knocking.. I hear my chest be banging Hard.. And I hit My Chest to tell MY Heart to settle Down.. GO back to Sleep because I am tired.. Arms wrap around me Pillow.. I close my eyes.. opens and tears would fled down.. I wonder.. What is wrong with me.. what is UP with these tears.. But MY Chest burns.. I feel like heart burn.. sun burn.. what ever this burn is.. Holding my pillow.. thinking of YOU.. and saying to MY pillow.. I love you and snap comes Out.. back to the reality.. squeezing the Pillow thinking of YOU.. and When I look that it is NOT you but only a Pillow.. I would cry because I am wishing that IT is YOU.. I would close my eyes.. and say.. I miss YOU.. Bo go ship puh yo.. I miss YOU so much.. I only want you here close to me.. I miss YOU.. Now I am sitting.. Looking at Your Heart in the Glass jar.. Me Heart sits next to me.. OH moe.. I can't find No key.. but I did find something.. a Picture and a Bottle.. Do you want to see the Picture First or do YOU want the bottle First.. Tell me Tell me.. I turn to Look.. Me Heart opens the TOP of bottle starts to Drink.. CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG and gives it to me.. I look at MY Heart.. as the Heart looks at Your Picture.. I feel so FUZZY inside.. like a Butterfly hitting me Head.. Looks at the Picture.. WHY DO I keep on falling in Love with YOU.. WHY are you doing this to me Heart heart.. WHY are you so Beautiful.. the Most Beautiful Flower.. WHY DO you keep on Hurting me.. aching me.. a Pinch.. like a Punch in my stomache.. OH it hurts to see YOU this Beautiful.. I rather get hit by a Fist in my face.. Instead because this is SO much Pain of Missing YOU.. only Loving YOU by myself.. WHY.. tell me why are YOU so Beautiful.. I grab the Picture and I take a Look at Your Picture.. I turn to LOOK at your Heart.. YOU are so Lovely and so Beautiful.. But I still want Your Heart.. What good is this Picture with Out your heart.. Tell me.. can I have your heart.. WILL you let me have Your Heart.. can I please Hold Your heart.. I want to Hold with both hands.. I want to hold it.. grab it.. feel it.. wrap my arms around it.. I want to love Your heart.. I grab me the Bottle.. Open me Mouth wide and CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG.. and I turn to Look at me heart.. How do YOU feel.. and me heart looks.. I feel a Heart ache.. and It burns inside of me each time I look at the picture but when I look at Your heart.. I want it.. I want the heart so bad.. I want it.. so please give me YOUR HEART.. the Heart looks at me.. Tell me how do YOU feel.. And I turn to LOOK at the Glass jar.. Open me Mouth wide.. the Bottle.. CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG.. I want that Heart.. finger points and touch the Glass jar.. I want that heart.. I want to feel it.. I want to touch that Heart.. I want to tell YOUR Heart.. I miss YOU.. I want to tell Your Heart.. I love YOU.. without the key.. How can I unlock and tell YOUR heart.. I miss YOU and that I love YOU.. I turn to Look at My Heart.. WHY did you bring the Picture and the Bottle for.. it is all useless without the Key.. it is only Hurting YOU and ME.. but I first want Your Heart.. tell me How can I get to Your Heart.. I open My Mouth and the Bottle.. CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG.. Put the bottle Down.. ME heart keeps on looking at Your Picture.. I want to see YOU.. I want to see YOU close.. why do YOU have to be so Far.. why can't you be close.. I want you near so I can see YOU.. I want to smell YOU.. I want to hold YOU.. I want to Kiss YOU too and tell YOU I love YOU.. WHY can't I tell you all these things being so Far.. I am sitting there.. Let me see the picture.. I grab the Picture.. MY Heart starts to cry.. He begins to SOB loud.. and wipes the tears from his Eyes.. OH WHY!! I miss YOU so much right Now.. Your picture does not help me in anyway.. but leaves this heart of missing only.. Just missing YOU.. why can't I be close to YOU so that I can Love YOU.. how can I love you when YOU are so far.. AS I take a Look at your Picture.. I can feel something inside of me.. I wish that I can't breathe any more.. I wish that I can sit by a grave and wait for my turn.. Loving YOU is Hard.. But missing YOU seems even harder these days.. Missing YOU because I want to hold YOU.. Missing YOU because I want to be with YOU.. I put the picture down.. wiping my tears.. CHAM CHAM.. Hitting my Chest with me hand.. CHAM CHAM.. I want it.. and I look at the glass jar.. Only IF I can get Your Heart.. I am looking at this Glass Jar.. How can I get to Your Heart.. it is just right There.. This Glass Jar.. WHAT SHOULD I DO.. It is this Heart.. YOUR HEART is right in front of me.. I want it.. Give it to Me.. That Heart.. This Heart.. YOUR HEART.. I want it.. I want this Heart.. I want want your heart.. I would get UP two legs.. the Glass Jar is so Big.. taller than me.. CHAM.. Me Two hands on the Glass jar.. I would Push.. two Arms Pushes the Glass jar.. Looking at Your Heart.. I want Your Heart.. I want it.. I would PUSH.. two arms pushes.. the Glass jar does not Move.. CHAM.. I want it.. I really really want it.. ME Body leans and tries to PUSH it.. but it still don't Move.. Me Heart stands UP.. OH MOE.. is that ALL you can give.. Push Harder.. PUSH it.. I look at this Glass Jar.. I am going to FLIP this GLASS JAR.. maybe the glass can break and I can get YOUR HEART.. I want it.. I want it.. I want Your Heart.. tell me How to get To your heart.. I want Your heart right Now.. tell me how do I get to YOUR heart.. so I can Love your heart.. I can tell Your heart How much I love YOU.. I want to tell Your Heart.. I want to be With you forever and ever and Forever I will love YOU.. Me heart looks at me.. I look at HIM.. COME and Help me.. let us Both Push it together.. COME NOW.. I love you.. Do I grab me heart and just leave it by the door and walk off.. But I just can't.. I take a look at your Picture.. I sit on the floor next to Me Heart Heart.. YOU are so Beautiful.. I want whisper into your ear and say.. YOU are so Beautiful.. the Most Beautiful In the world.. the most Prettiest and most adorable.. who drives me crazy every time.. leaves me speech less and takes my breathe away every time I take a look at YOU.. YOU are the most beautiful
Why are you Leaving Me? Why can't YOU stay here with Me and WHY do you must go.. I am sitting down.. Holding the Empty Glass Jar.. Please don't go.. Stay here with me.. I turn my Head looking towards the Door.. WHY are you breaking my Heart.. Don't you know that I love you.. I never stopped Loving YOU and You were so Close.. YOU even came Out and even Sat Next to me.. if you have come this Far and suddenly YOU are telling me that YOU have to go.. at least you could of told me where YOU were going.. Now.. Now.. I just can't Stop thinking of YOU.. I can't get rid of YOU off my Mind.. I can't find an eraser.. If you were to go.. YOU could of left an Eraser so that At least I could of erased YOU off my mind.. NOW you have put something Inside my Head and it sank deep into my Soul and My Heart.. WHY did YOU have to Go.. WHY did you even come out and Now.. Look at me.. I am here dying inside my Heart.. Inside my Soul.. and only thing that is left behind is YOU.. I am looking down.. Looking at the Empty Glass jar.. Where is the heart.. where is Your Heart.. I thought for a Moment I saw Your Heart inside this Glass jar but Now.. I do not see a Heart.. Please.. Wait wait.. Give me Your Heart.. YOU can go.. Only please Leave your heart behind.. Leave your heart with me.. I will take good care and I will always Love Your Heart.. I will tell YOUR HEART.. I will never Let You Go and tell Your heart How much I love you.. and have never stopped Loving YOU.. but if YOU can please come back and Just leave Your Heart.. I can at least Know that I still can Love YOU.. by loving Your heart forever.. YOU know how much I want Your Heart.. How Much I need Your Heart.. Care for Your Heart and will tell YOUR HEART.. I will always be here.. waiting For YOU.. I will wait for YOU until the day I die but.. if you can please come back and don't leave me.. Next to me is the Basket.. Full of Dozen of SUN Flowers.. and I turn to look at the Basket.. My hand grabs One Sun Flower.. I put it close to My Nose.. and smell.. OH wow.. this smell.. it is so Sweet.. the smell reminds me of YOU.. smelling so Sweet and also so Beautiful like this Flower.. if you can come back to me.. I can at least show YOU this Sun Flower and can Let you smell what I smell.. so Sweet just like YOU.. but if you want to smell.. YOU needs to come out.. Please come back to me because.. what will YOU do if I start to miss YOU.. if my Heart starts to miss YOU.. and I miss YOU.. how about this Sun Flower.. who is also waiting for YOU.. to show YOU how beautiful and How so Sweet and wants to be sent to YOU.. I want to give you this Sun Flower.. But.. Please come back to me.. Show me Your Face again.. Now I just can't stop but only think of YOU.. YOU drive me Crazy Now.. YOU drive me mad because ever since I saw YOU.. YOU have light up what is inside of me.. YOU have awaken my Heart.. he is asking for YOU.. Knocking at the door of my Chest.. keeps on knocking asking WHO woke HIM UP.. telling me to Tell YOU and Your heart.. I love YOU.. I love YOU.. Please don't go and Please come back.. Come back so that I can at least take one more look before I cry.. YOU are so Beautiful.. You are so Beautiful.. That my Eyes tells me.. I want to cry.. The most beautiful Flower.. the Most beautiful I ever seen.. The most beautiful that there will be no one who is as Beautiful as Your Are.. And Now.. I want to see YOU again.. I am still looking at the door.. Please come back.. Holding UP the Empty Glass jar.. can you not see that I have prepared this for You.. I have been waiting.. It use to be a flower Jar.. a Flower use to grow in this Glass Jar.. a Sun Flower.. I put a soil and the seed.. water day and night.. put it out in the sun.. and suddenly it became a Flower.. a Sun Flower because I would be thinking of YOU.. I wanted to grow it for myself to see if it can really happen.. so that When it becomes a full bloom Sun Flower.. I can take it to YOU and tell YOU.. It started out as a seed.. wanted to see it to be a SUN FLOWER.. I wanted to give it to YOU.. the Hard work of years of putting.. and just to show YOU.. you will be the first to take a Look and I wanted to give it as a present to show YOU.. I cared and loved as it is YOU.. I loved my Sun Flower just as much as I love you and wanted to tell YOU.. I love you like this Flower.. But.. YOU have broken my heart.. my heart shattered because I could not see YOU.. For a long time I have been waiting for YOU to come Out.. as I would be waiting by this Door.. the Door never opened.. My Heart started to cry and asked me.. How Long.. How Long Must I be weeping for YOU.. How long must the wait be.. Sitting on this holding the Glass Jar with the Sun Flower.. I would be knocking at the door to give you the first.. I saw seasons come and seasons go.. I would be sitting at the same spot.. And I looked at the Sun Flower.. I asked.. maybe YOU don't love me.. Maybe You will never come Out.. never come UP.. One night.. I started to see the light rain falling from the sky.. Holding the Glass jar with the Sun flower.. I started to cry.. my tears ran down.. and I asked.. I wanted your Love.. I only wanted to see Your Face.. and All I wanted to give you is my Love through this Sun Flower.. as I sat down.. the light rain started to pour down hard.. I would be mourning Loud as the thunder roared and I looked at the Sun Flower.. I am so sorry that YOU don't love me.. I am so sorry for YOU to be waiting like this with me.. and looking at the Sun Flower I saw it crying too.. No one likes to be rejected and Hurt.. No one wants to feel this pain aching.. ALL I wanted is Your to Love me back.. ALL I wanted is for YOU TO at least notice me.. and I yelled Out loud.. and Screamed from my Lungs to the Sun Flower.. I am so Sorry.. I am so Sorry to make you feel this way.. I am so sorry.. My hand grab the stem of the Sun Flower.. I pulled it Out and I started to cry More.. as the Rain flood down on me.. I threw the Sun Flower on the ground.. My hand touch my Chest.. I saw YOU raised UP.. I saw YOU from the seed and Saw you grow up.. My hand hit the chest.. few times.. And I looked Up the sky.. and Screamed OUT Loud of More.. Only thing I wanted is YOU to know how much I love YOU.. I wanted to show you My Heart that this is the way I love you.. to give you a Sun Flower who came from birth and like a SON to me.. I wanted to give you This Flower.. I saw few boys running through the rain.. started to step on the Sun Flower.. and I did not see that Sun Flower any more
I am looking at this Empty Glass jar.. I just can't believe.. Only if I could of waited few more days.. Only If I had the patient.. I could at least show you this Flower.. ME Sun Flower.. I came back with this Glass jar.. Now Empty and Without the Sun Flower.. But I have a Basket Full of Flowers.. they are the Sun Flowers but I picked them from the field.. I turn to look at the door.. Such a memory of Pain in my heart.. I just could not believe the door finally opened.. DID NOT expect to see YOU.. My heart was robbed.. WHEN YOU came out.. My heart came from sleeping.. and started to Beat On my Chest.. a Heart beat.. Running through my Body.. through my Chest. My Heart started to beat again.. started to beat faster when I saw the door opened and saw YOU stood.. I remember pinching myself to see if it hurts.. am I dreaming.. am I seeing a vision.. What was happening inside my Chest.. WHY was my Heart beating faster and faster.. as you stood There.. I felt the tears of Joy.. Waiting and waiting.. Going to the same spot to sit on this bench.. the same spot for a long time.. just waiting for YOU to open that door.. I saw you walking.. I wanted to drop my Empty Glass jar.. A jump in my heart.. leaping out of nowhere.. and There you were.. the Most beautiful Flower.. the Greatest but the Most Prettiest my eyes ever saw.. I just couldn't breathe.. I felt something got stuck.. When you sat next to me.. I wanted to just fall and faint right in front of you.. I looked at the Empty Glass Jar.. my Heart grew so sad.. If I just waited few more days.. I could given you the SON.. the Sun Flower who came from the seed.. from the birth and could told you.. I have kept this Flower for a long time.. and wanted to give to the right person.. This Sun Flower belongs to YOU because it was all just for YOU.. and wanted to tell YOU by giving this Glass Jar.. I love you.. I was thinking of YOU as I planted.. I was thinking of YOU as I put bowl of waters into the soil.. I was thinking of you as I walked this Out in the front.. watching the SUN and the heat.. I saw the peek of its head.. I saw the stem.. and after few months.. I saw the Sun Flower raised UP.. I was truly thinking of YOU because I was touched by Love.. I wanted to give you this as My Love.. and Only wanted You to notice How much I love you.. AS you sat next to me.. I wanted to cry because It was an Empty Glass jar.. I had dreams and visions of giving as a present.. giving you as my Heart.. whole heart was put into it.. I saw you so Beautiful.. Like this Sun Flower.. as beautiful as You are.. Now I sat down in silent.. only holding the empty glass jar.. BUT.. as I looked at you.. I wanted something from YOU.. how about Your heart.. can YOU put your Heart inside it.. I will place a Sun Flower next to your heart.. I want to see if Your Heart would be moved as I would tell YOU a story about My Love for YOU.. Inspired by Love because of just loving YOU.. Loving you without anything in return.. Just loving YOU because YOU are my Sun Flower.. the Flower who blooms In my heart.. the Flower who makes me sing and dance.. makes me smile when I am so sad or lonely.. But also just to say I love you.. Only because it is YOU who are my Sun Flower.. I saw you get UP.. I wanted your heart.. Please.. tell me that I can have your heart.. I will take good care of her.. Leave me your Heart so that I can share the story of My Sun Flower.. Please.. Don't go.. Don't leave me hanging like this because I want your heart now.. so Don't go.. I grabbed your wrist.. Placing the Empty glass jar on the Bench.. I kneeled.. Please don't go.. my hand holding your Wrist.. stay here with me a little longer.. then.. promise me to leave your heart.. I need YOU.. I need your heart.. I need your Love.. I want Your Love.. I want you.. then If you can accept this heart of mine.. leave your heart.. I grabbed a Sun Flower from the basket and Placed inside the Empty Glass jar.. give me Your heart.. I want it.. I need it.. if YOU must go now.. Then.. My Love.. my Darling.. Leave your heart with me.. I will make Your heart happy.. I will bring the joy into your heart and will love Your heart.. WILL love you all my life.. See.. I pulled your wrist.. You Turned to look.. A Sun Flower.. waiting for your heart.. your other hand pushes my hand off the wrist and I saw YOU walk off.. DOOR opens and it closes.. I hit my Chest.. my hand hits hard my chest.. I can feel my Heart being attacked.. My heart beating.. Wait.. Please.. WHY do you must go.. why do you leave me behind.. I am all yours.. I love you.. I love you More than anything in this world.. baby.. Please come back.. Please don't go.. my two eyes opens.. I am laying on my bed.. I sit UP.. I am missing YOU.. I keep on missing YOU.. I need YOU.. if you know how much I miss YOU.. if you know how much I love you.. why do you have to leave me like this.. WHY Do you hurt me if YOU know I love you.. DO you not want MY Love.. I can love you.. I can always love you.. I can love you where you will find No regrets.. my eyes.. with Tears falls down.. and I start to cry.. All I want is to give you love.. and wants YOU to know How much I want this love and How much Love I can give.. Please don't go.. and come to me.. I walk out of the Room and Stops.. a Big Box in the middle of the room.. On the Floor lays a Picture.. On top of the Big Box is a Ribbon.. and there is a Door.. I walk to the Middle and Stops.. I look down.. grabbing the picture.. It is You.. I stop to breathe In and Out.. My words.. What words should I say about Your Picture.. Leaving me Confused because.. My Heart just can't Beat right.. My eyes wants to jump out.. shivers down my Spine.. brings me Chills all over me because.. YOU are so Beautiful.. I do not know how many times I must tell YOU this.. But BEAUTIFUL.. is the only word.. Why are you so Beautiful.. WHY is this Picture laying On my Floor.. where did this Picture Come from.. I am standing here.. wondering.. I am Not a Photographer.. I do not take pictures and Have never taken a Picture of YOU.. BUT.. Your picture is here.. and has been waiting for me.. I am looking at your Picture.. Why are you so Pretty Pretty.. how is that YOU are so Beautiful..
Oink Oink.. Watching the Rain falling from the sky.. I came Out side.. just could not get YOU off my Mind.. thinking of YOU hurts My Head because it starts with my Heart be missing YOU.. trying to keep my Mind.. my thoughts out of YOU.. I decided to walk Out side.. but did Not expect the Rain to show UP.. as I am standing.. I see the Light rain showering Down.. When I am in the Room.. I been drinking a lot.. the Bottle is inside in the Room.. and Now it is empty bottle.. How can I take a Message to YOU.. How can I tell YOU that I am waiting for YOU.. to tell YOU that I love YOU.. will you let me Love YOU over and over again.. waiting here.. I know that I just can't tell YOU.. as I am Out side.. I brought the Little Piano.. and I been trying to record the Playing of the Piano on this Recorder.. I can Put the Tape into the empty Bottle.. so that I can send it to YOU.. But How.. that is the Question that has been popping in my Head all this Time.. I be in the Room.. siting by the desk.. and I be looking at your Picture.. as I would LOOK at the Picture of YOU.. there is something that I must say.. I must tell YOU before it be Just too Late.. Not sure what it is but I know my Time is running Out.. and the TIME tics very fast.. that is WHY I have NO Other time but Now to tell YOU.. what's been in my Mind.. what's been in my Heart.. and I needs to tell YOU.. But.. How am I suppose to get it across to YOU.. if I am here.. standing Out side.. Looking at the Rain falling from the Sky.. it is lightly Rain.. the Little Piano is telling Me that I needs to play a Song for YOU.. that I needs to hit the Key bars which brings Out a tune of songs.. something that YOU can listen too.. but I be asking my self.. WHAT DO I Play.. I be looking at this Little Piano.. who is standing Next to Me Out side.. if I know that I can't even play this kind of Instrument.. but my Heart is telling me that I needs to play a SONG for YOU through this Little Piano who is with me right Now.. it hasn't been played for a Long time.. but it wants me to Play something.. but I know that I can't.. that is HOW I feel about YOU.. that I wants to be with YOU.. that I wants to see YOU.. and be near YOU so that I can tell YOU how much I love YOU.. that My arms been missing YOU.. asking myself I needs to Hold YOU close in my arms.. I needs to hold you tight.. but I know just standing here Out side.. after LOOKING at your Picture and taking some shots of the Liquor in the Room.. I feel like looking at this Little Piano who is next to me.. even though the Presence of the Little Piano may be near me.. I can't even play a Song.. I can't compose or write a Music.. I can't sing while playing the Little Piano.. but it is very close to Me here.. so I been asking myself.. what is better.. If you were near me and very Close but I can't do anything with YOU.. or is it better that YOU are so far away and I ache of missing YOU.. but.. is it the Letter that I can write to give YOU.. because I would sit by the desk.. and I would look at the Pen in my hand and I would LOOK at the Piece of paper in the front.. LOOKING at your Picture of YOU.. just aching and Missing YOU.. I would pen it DOWN on the paper.. sharing and telling YOU as I would write.. what My Heart be telling me.. How much I been thinking of YOU and Missing YOU.. that YOU are the Only One who I love.. that YOU are the Only One I think of and the One who I misses the Most.. as I would stop.. Pouring on the Shot Glass the Liquor.. and I would sit.. Aching this pain from my Heart.. I would like to tear my Heart Out of me because it hurts.. Missing YOU hurts me.. and also just loving YOU hurts Me.. and also just thinking of YOU hurts me even More because there is NOTHING I can do.. and I would LOOK.. Look at the Little Piano.. and I am holding it in my arms.. I want to play.. I want to sing.. I want to bring Music Out of by pressing on the Key bars of this Instrument to bring Music OUT so that I can sing songs to YOU.. it drives me Nuts.. it drives me crazy because I see the Little Piano.. and I think of YOU and I want to share More to YOU and express this Heart to YOU.. but How can I if I can't Play on this Little Piano.. to tell YOU by singing songs.. I would be crying OUT my Heart as I would tell YOU through the Voice.. singing and singing Out my Heart as YOU.. as I would have the Letter In my Hand and through the Letter I would write.. I write my Heart which has YOUR NAME on the Front telling YOU.. WHY is my Heart be burning and why do I feel like I am dying.. drowning deeply.. LOOKING at the Little Piano makes me Cry.. it makes me want to cry Harder because it is a way to tell YOU.. if I would of learned years back of playing.. and when I did had that Chance to practice.. Only If I could turn back at the age of the YOUTH.. I should of learned at that TIME of the Chance.. I know if I did take that Chance at that TIME of the YOUTH.. I would be playing on that Little Piano.. and I would also record my Voice to tell YOU.. even though I may not have a GOOD voice to sing to YOU.. I would of practice my voice if I learned HOW to play this Little Piano.. and I would find ways to tell YOU MORE.. I be able to sit on the TOP of the MOON if I can.. and I be holding the Little Piano in my arms.. and sitting on the TOP OF the MOON.. I know that YOU are able to hear me Out.. I would turn to YOU.. and will say.. CAN YOU SEE ME.. I am sitting on the TOP of this MOON.. I do not know How I got here but I begged for two WINGS and It was provided just for this ONE VERY NIGHT.. to Put on ONE show.. I have written YOU a Letter so that WHEN YOU hear me playing on this Little Piano.. YOU can hear my Voice.. every Night.. I been thinking of YOU.. My Voice hurts but I had to practice.. every NIGHT I sang Out from my Heart.. crying because My Heart tells me HOW MUCH I love YOU.. Crying to tell YOU that THIS IS what Happens when YOU LOVE.. I don't want to be Like a Little GIRL because I am NOT.. but I can express and tell YOU.. as I be going into the rest room.. and singing SONGS.. working Out with my VOICE to be Heard.. it be that Just One Night.. where I can Sit on the TOP of the MOON with me is the Little Piano with me.. as I sit next to the Little Piano.. and my fingers on the Key bars of the Little Piano.. I would have your Picture with me.. showing YOU here is YOU.. Your Picture and if YOU can see me sitting in the TOP of the MOON.. my fingers would Hit the Key bars and it brings Out the Sounds.. making Songs with the Music from the LITTLE PIANO.. I would pull out the Letter.. and I would read the Letter Out Loud where YOU can hear my Voice telling YOU.. and I would say.. I been practicing for a long time.. Of course YOU would of Not know it because It was truly Behind the curtains.. I would Not tell any one what I was doing because I wanted to put on ONE SHOW for YOU.. sitting on the TOP of the MOON is the Only way for YOUR EYES to LOOK at me.. there was NO OTHER WAY.. and I would say.. Please.. give Your ears to me.. Give me few Minutes because that is ONLY one TIME I can do this for YOU.. Please.. give me your ears and I would say.. can YOU Hear me.. if YOU can Lift UP your Head and LOOK.. I am sitting ON the top of this MOON.. with me is the Little Piano.. since I was young.. I was made to play on this Little Piano so the day I can see YOU.. I am able to share something special to YOU which comes from my Heart.. and I would shout.. I love YOU.. I love you just too Much.. I love you from here UP at the MOON to YOU.. and I have been missing YOU.. as My fingers are pressing on the Key bars of this Little Piano.. and I am Looking at YOU sitting on TOP of the MOON.. I would be looking at the Letter I wrote to YOU.. I would say to YOU.. can YOU see me now.. Can you hear me Now.. Please give me Your time for few minutes because It is Not going to be that Long.. I been loving YOU.. and I am Not just saying it so that it make you feel nice.. I am saying it and telling you because It is In My Heart whose been loving YOU for So long.. can YOU hear the Little Piano playing a SONG.. can YOU Hear the Music that is coming out of this Little Piano.. I had to write the Music so that YOU will know that It came from me to YOU.. SO Please.. give me few Minutes of your time to hear me Out because I will Not be Long.. and as I would tell YOU what I have written on the Letter.. I will say to YOU.. I am Not sure when the Next time would Be.. when I will get another Chance to sit on the Top of this Moon.. but if the MOON allows me to get back here again.. I would so that I can tell YOU more with the Little Piano making song and music to Come alive.. I am only doing this to YOU so that YOU can see the real side of My Heart of How much I truly Love YOU.. and as I am standing next to the Little Piano.. I am Looking UP at the MOON.. and the rain starts to fall harder and harder and starts to pour down.. and I know I am getting More soak wet as I just stand here.. I am Only LOOKING at the MOON high above Me.. and I am NOT siting on the Top of the MOON any more.. I know that the Only way YOU can hear me.. that YOU can see me is if I can sit On the TOP of that Moon.. and show YOU this Little Piano with me.. playing to tell YOU how much I really Love YOU.. as I turn toward the Door.. I am able to take the Little Piano with me Back to the House.. I can't play the Little Piano what breaks my Heart.. even if there was a Chance for me to Sit on the Top of the MOON and the Little Piano with me.. I still would NOT able to share.. or Play the Little Piano to YOU.. that is how I feel most nights.. WHEN I look at your Picture.. when I pull your Picture and I take a Look at YOU.. I can only look.. but I want to have YOU close.. I want to be with YOU and tell YOU can I be with YOU forever.. will you be mine for ever please.. and I sit by the desk.. aching.. and I feel like
MAH MAH.. I am standing in the training camp.. and I see you coming over from the Fence.. the Big Crown on the Top of your Head.. and the White Dress.. as I see you walk alone.. YOU take my breathe away.. and I can feel my Heart beating so fast.. and as YOU come to meet me in the Center of the training camp.. the New Recruits.. over 200 men are standing by.. as YOU stop.. in my hands is the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. and I am standing looking at YOU as I am looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing of YOU.. I do not need this any more.. but Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU have to always remember that when you were Never around.. this was the Only THING that Held my Heart because whenever I missed YOU.. this was the Only thing that helped me through the way.. When I was left alone for a Long time.. this was the Only thing.. it may Not be anything special to YOU.. It may not be any of the importance to YOU.. YOU may just look at it as a paper.. that someone drew long ago.. and it may only seems like the past piece of Art.. but to Me.. it has many memories of loving YOU.. many Memories of Looking UP at the Moon.. standing Alone in the Nights.. there was SUN.. but also there was the MOON.. there was a time when Winter came by and it be very cold outside.. when times I saw the falling of the rain.. when I lost my Father.. and I felt my Heart broke all the way.. when I could Not see YOU and even the BOY who drew this Picture.. How he had to sneak into the Palace gates and How from the Far he drew YOU.. who got caught and arrested.. He was beaten and Put to death.. telling me that this is for me and knowing that HE wishes that My Dreams came true and that ALL this did Not mean Nothing to Me as he died by the Sword.. Even the Older MAN.. who was the teacher in my Life saw this Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU who knew WHO you are.. but told me to GO.. and to Protect YOU and to defend the Nation which it belongs to YOU and this Art Sketch paper.. the drawing picture of YOU was the main reason WHY I could go On.. when I was at the Garden.. and I saw YOU there for the first TIME.. I wanted that Boy to draw.. of course I knew it be just too late to call HIM.. when I saw YOU by the gates of the Garden and I walked Out and saw YOU.. I wanted to ask YOU.. Can you Please draw another or Give me another Picture from the Art Sketch.. but.. when YOU left.. Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. the Day you left the Garden is when I knew the Only thing I had was this.. and my arms would lift as my hands are Holding the Art Sketch paper.. the Picture drawing of YOU.. it was only this I had because I knew.. I was Not sure if I could ever see YOU again.. when I would see YOU again was my thoughts.. going UP the Hill and standing by the tree below was the Garden and Across I would see the palace.. and Knowing that is the Place where YOU at.. I wanted to Go.. I wanted to be close to YOU.. but what if I am NOT ALLOWED to get in and be put into the Prison instead.. But.. I made UP my mind.. I can die tomorrow and I will say I love YOU.. I can die the few days Later.. as Long there is still a Breathe IN me.. I know I can still Believe in Loving YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. and I do remember leaving the Garden after I made UP my Mind.. in the Snow walking and knowing How cold it was.. and knowing I could die A lot sooner.. I felt the Last Push of my body as I kept on walking through the SNOW.. I was thinking of YOU.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I am not sure How much More I have in Me.. But I will still try to go to YOU and I kept on walking in the Snow and I felt my body.. it could NOT go no more and I fell down in the Snow.. I kept on thinking of YOU until the last breathe saying I am so sorry I might Not make It.. As I was on the Guard.. watching the Post at Night.. and How I became the Palace guard guarding the back gates.. I do remember pulling the Art sketch paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. and LOOKING.. I been needing to LOOK.. thinking of YOU.. saying to this Art sketch paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. YOU may not hear my voice be telling YOU but I say it as I look at YOU.. that I love YOU.. do you know How much I love YOU and I would hold the Art Sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture close to my Heart.. to my Chest.. I wish that I be holding YOU instead but.. it be this paper instead.. someone telling me that Behind me is the Chamber of Your ROOM.. and I remember I turn back to LOOK.. I saw YOU.. looking Out from the patio of the Chamber of Your ROOM.. the MOON was Out.. I would LOOK UP at.. I would say MAH MAH.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. can YOU see me.. I am here and it has been such a Long time coming.. and Now.. I know that I do Not need this Piece of Paper.. the Art Sketch paper any more.. I want to see YOU take this from Me.. Now I am here close to YOU.. I told the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. Once I meet YOU.. I can Now send it away and give it to YOU because it belongs to YOU.. it has come to the right Person WHO I love the Most.. so Please take this from Me because I am giving YOU my Heart.. My Heart is in it because it is YOU who I never forgotten.. and I see YOU LOOKING at me.. as I am on two Knees.. My Head is Looking on the floor.. my arms raise with the Paper.. the Art sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. Please take this From me because I don't need it any more.. why do I need it when I see YOU here.. there is NO POINT for me to have because it is YOU.. I see your hands take the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. and my tears.. it starts to flow Out of both eyes of me.. I can finally let that Piece of Paper GO and allow the Boy to finally rest in Piece.. the Seven Friends of Mine would walk together and they would all stand Behind.. the two Knees and Heads look on the floor.. arms straight Out.. and I see YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. Now One of the Guards comes and has a Torch in the Hand and Gives to YOU.. and I see YOU Burn it with the Fire and It becomes the Ashes before my eyes.. I just can't believe It.. and as I see YOU looking down.. I see you with a SMILE.. and I smile back because it means everything to Me.. YOU are truly everything to Me.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH means everything to me.. and I hear something.. I hear foot steps walking.. and I see you Crown Princess turn Around and Comes.. the 2nd Rank General is coming.. and there is Seven Other Lower Generals walking behind Him and the Eight stops next to YOU.. the 2nd RANK General with the seven generals all goes to the two Knees.. Heads all lowers looking to the floor.. Arms come out straight forward.. and I see YOU LOOKING at HIM.. pulling Out your Sword.. the 2nd Rank General speaks to YOU and it is about Me.. and How he knows me.. He has beaten me before.. and Now.. wants to fight me.. and YOU would turn to LOOK at me.. and Point the sword at Me.. I lift UP my Head and I look over.. and I DO remember.. MAH MAH.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. I will accept the Challenge.. and I see YOU walk back and as I am looking at the 2nd Rank General.. I remember when I first Came to the training Camp.. when He just became the General.. and I just got into the camp.. as I would stand UP.. the Seven of my Friends all stood behind Me.. and the 2nd Rank General Stands UP.. and the Seven of the Lower rank Generals all stands UP.. and I would look at HIM.. and I would PULL out the sword.. and I knew that He beat me Once.. and I would say.. YOU did WIN last time.. but this TIME.. it be very Different.. and I would turn to LOOK at YOU.. and I raise UP my arm and the Seven Friends all would back way.. and the 2nd Rank General PULLS out his Sword.. but this time.. it is NOT about WIN with the sticks.. it is all about the Sword.. DO or DIE.. and I would run.. holding with the Sword in my hand and I jump into air and I would swing my arm holding the Sword and jump up again shouting louder and swinging the arm with the sword in my Hand.. as I am In the Line.. the Guard at the Table looks and YOU.. the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I just can't believe that it is YOU.. and as YOU stand by the table.. YOU look at the two Letters.. one is the Official Seal with a Stamp of the Name of the OLDER MAN.. the Commander of the King.. PEH HA.. and the Other is the written Letter from Me giving to YOU through the years what I had to deal to get to YOU.. and I see you reading the Letter.. the New Friend was with me and He also gives the Official Seal with the stamp of his Father.. the Commander and I am holding the Sword of my Grand father and the Friend is holding His Father's sword and YOU look at the two swords and YOU look at the Guard to let us inside.. and I just cannot believe it.. it has been this Long.. and Now I am here.. I am at the Camp.. this training camp Only the YOUNG NEW RECRUITS can pass the exam of the military Arts.. but by the seal.. the official Seal and stamp.. and I would fall.. both on my two knees.. with the New Friend.. both on the two Knees.. heads are looking on the ground.. and arms straight forward.. CROWN PRINCESS.. we are here.. have made it to the Camp.. I thought I had to wait another Year.. but even Next year would be NO Promise.. since the Line is so Long.. Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. I just wanted to say thank YOU.. and I see YOU stand.. in your hands are the Official Seals and stamps.. as YOU would pull out the sword and Point to me.. I would lift UP my Head and I turn to LOOK at YOU and I would say.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. why did YOU not come to the Garden.. DO you know that I been waiting
MAH MAH.. Place.. I saw a WHOLE NEW WORLD because it was YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. who rescued the Broken and Lost.. the Poor people and has rebuild everything into something New.. I saw re building of the Garden.. I wanted to see YOU.. Crown Princess.. I wanted to see YOU.. I would wonder.. where is the CROWN PRINCESS.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. without YOU it would never been re build at that Garden.. Lives changed because YOU came.. sick people became healthy and they started to eat well.. Planters and farmers came together.. giving a New Life of meaning to Live.. I sat.. and I was looking for YOU.. But YOU never came.. because YOU did Not come back to the Garden.. and I wanted to say something., say thank YOU.. but YOU never came that is NOW I have come.. NOW I have come to protect YOU and to defend YOU.. LOOK at the Official Seal.. and LOOK at the Stamp on the Paper I gave YOU WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the Older MAN.. the Teacher who taught me for Many Years.. He told me that He fought for this Nation.. with My Grand father.. together as Brothers At War.. they both joined hands together and has protected your Father.. the KING PEH HA.. He is the One who taught me through these years of the Art of Swordsmanship and to shoot arrows and TOLD me stories of the Battles He had to face.. many died by the Sword of His with my Grand father's sword too.. protecting this NATION and to protect.. the Teacher knows that I loved YOU.. I showed HIM the Art Sketch paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. I showed him that Picture.. drawing picture and that I wanted to be the ONE to protect YOU and to defend the Nation.. and the Older man.. the Teacher started to show Me how to WIN the Battles of the War because He has experienced and has passed DOWN the Knowledge and the experiences to me with his Son.. Now I came here for this very reason.. TO protect YOU and to defend the Nation and to tell YOU.. CROWN PRINCESS how much I love YOU..I want to see you Success.. My Heart as the Loyal Slave.. as the Servant.. as the Low Born which My Father was the Head of the Servant.. as I am sitting in the Small room.. the Older Man.. the Teacher gave me a small table and I am with a Paper.. with the Ink I would write to the Crown Princess.. MAH MAH.. I have been living in this Place.. the Older man who has become my Teacher has told me that He wanted me as the Son.. so I have become his adopted Son.. and He has been teaching me for Years.. and I would be looking at the Pen Brush and dip into the Ink Pot.. I have never stopped dreaming of YOU.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I have been practicing the Art of Swordsmanship.. and Also the Archer Shooting.. the Older man who has become the Teacher.. He would spend Hours helping me to learn this Military Arts and has told me to write a Letter to the Crown Princess.. so I am about to leave this Place with the Official Letter which was sealed with his Stamp allowing me to step Out and go forward.. telling me that through the Years.. He has watched me grow my skills of the Art of swordsmanship and the practice tactic of the Military Arts and with this Official Letter seal that I am able to pass over and go into the Training Camp without going into the training ground.. He has revealed to me that He was an EX COMMANDER for the King.. he was at the Most Highest Place in the ranking of the Office in the Palace and showed me the sword of which He has won many Battles for YOUR FATHER the KING PEH HA.. I was shocked when I found this Out because He showed me the Sword.. which he took many lives and He knew my Grand father who was also the Chief General.. who also became the Commander and was Brothers in War and together they led many Victories in the Battles when Enemies rose against the Nation.. the Teacher told me.. the Older Man who is my teacher told me that I must Protect YOU.. and also Needed to defend because HE remembers you.. He knows my father who was the Head servant and saw YOU when YOU were Young with my Grandfather and knew.. Later down the Line.. Both would say.. the COMMANDERS would say YOU are going to rule.. that YOU are going to be the Head of the Nation.. that YOU are the next in Line to be at the RULING SPOT.. that YOU are going to be the QUEEN KING.. the Ruler who rules it all.. and when the Older man.. the Teacher saw me with the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing of YOU.. he looked at me and asked.. and I told the Teacher.. the Older man who you are.. I told Him.. I love YOU.. and that the reason why I am here.. and that the reason why I am going to you has never changed in my heart but keeps Loving YOU.. the Older man.. the teacher said to me.. CROWN PRINCESS right.. I told him.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and I sat next to HIM and told him the story of How I saw YOU.. where I met YOU.. and it was at the Garden.. and how you came to visit the Garden One Night.. I already had Your Picture then.. the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. I heard the men servants walking.. with the Many Foot soldiers.. the Special Body Guards and the Guards who all came that night.. I heard a Voice.. I was in the Garden Looking at the Bed of Flowers.. and I heard a Noise.. a shouting and there was a gate I would open to LOOK.. sitting on the Horse.. YOU were wearing a White Dress.. I was holding the Art Sketch paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. but did Not know that it was YOU.. the MEN Servants looks at me.. the Crown Princess.. and I just could not believe.. from the Palace.. who is going to rule and be the Head over the Nation.. I am at the Most Lowest Place.. the SON of the Head servant.. and I fell down on my face DOWN and I would say MAH MAH.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I am so sorry I did not Know who YOU are.. and the Guards rush and fell on fours and Your Legs on the back of a Guards.. the maid servants who came to rush for your hands and helps you to walk.. every one went FACE DOWN to the Ground.. I just could not believe it.. why would you come to this Garden.. it is only for the Poor and the Lowest people who lives here.. why would you care for people who are born into the Most lowest comes to a shabby place.. I felt my Heart.. My Heart started to beat so fast.. and I saw YOU stand and stopped next to me.. the maid servant tells me that I can raise UP.. and I was able to stand before YOU.. YOU are so beautiful.. and One hand I had a Flower.. the Other hand is the Art sketch paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. and your eyes were looking at both hands so I would raise it up to show you.. YOU looked at the Art sketch paper.. the drawing of YOU.. the Maid servant looks at me.. and the eyes told me I can be in danger because of this.. and I remember I told YOU this very night.. if I have offended you HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. if YOU want me to rip this Art Sketch paper into pieces.. I can do it for YOU.. if you want me to be Locked in Prison and I die for this.. I can die for YOU.. before you make up your Mind to do something please let me share something from my Heart.. I am Not afraid to Die.. I am always ready to die.. I will anyways die either Now or Later but I still will die.. but one thing that I wanted to say.. I been loving YOU for a while Now.. it may not be much to YOU but this is ALL I have to have to Love.. if you want to Lock me UP now.. Please CROWN PRINCESS.. Lock me UP now.. and I saw YOU just looking at me and gave me a smile.. and I remember you wanted me to see the Garden.. and that was the day I would walk next to YOU to give you a tour of this Garden.. which it was to show YOU in the first place.. I told my Father when he was alive that I wanted to do something to this Garden.. and showing my Father the Art sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. that I know that the Crown Princess may stop by one day.. HE looked at me like I am very crazy.. I would beg my father to help me to making this Garden to be a special Place.. what if the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH shows UP.. I believe the Crown Princess will come.. and My Father who was alive at that time laughs at me.. the ROYALITY and the Palace Life.. this is a SHABBY Place.. only for the Poorest People stay here and I would cry before HIM asking HIM.. to Help me to rebuild this Garden.. I know that the Crown Princess.. as I saw YOU with the White Dress.. I would stand with in awe and My lines of tears ran down because YOU did Come.. I just could not believe that It would happen because it just Can't but that Night.. the Night MAH MAH came.. I fell in love with YOU harder because that is when I knew.. you also cared about the poor people.. the Lowest of lives who lives here.. people who has no place to stay or to live.. as the gates OPENED and I would walk with YOU next to me.. the Crown Princess.. I just knew that YOU were so Special.. that YOU were so different because YOU even came here.. the POOR people all came Out.. NO HOMES.. living in straw homes.. people were dirty and smelly.. and I lived with these people.. but when YOU showed UP.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and YOU looked around.. and people all came crying.. and they fell on the Face Down.. MAH MAH.. CROWN PRINCESS.. MAH MAH and I fell on the Face on the Ground and I started to SOBB.. crying and pouring out from my Heart.. and I was thinking about my Father.. if you came a little earlier.. My Father could of believed Me because he left to another place.. and I just could Not believe to see your Big Heart for these kinds of people.. the Lowly people
MAH MAH.. Friend.. the two of Us got on the Horses and we took Off.. as I am waiting in the Line.. with the new Friend.. He also has a Letter given by His Father.. and I too.. a HORN BLOWS and ALL the Men in the Line all lowers.. two Knees.. Heads lower and the Arm straight forward.. the Messenger Shouts Out Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH is coming.. and I stood there.. My Heart starts to Beat faster after I heard you came Out.. and I saw YOU from the Distance.. and I went on both knees.. Head down and Arm straight forward.. I just can't believe.. thinking of the Older man.. the Teacher.. who taught me everything.. swinging swords and defending.. and when I told the past story of How you came to the garden to the Poorest People living in the Garden.. and he started to cry.. That is why YOU are going to RULE the Nation.. that is why YOU are going to be the NeXT BIG RULER.. because YOU love and care for the people.. and my tears started to fall hitting on the Ground.. I saw YOU walking down.. from the distance.. and How much I missed YOU.. and it was so Long since the last when we were young.. I remember at the Garden.. you saw the People.. POOR children walking and YOU looked around and people gathered around YOU.. sick people came too.. and I heard you telling.. to rebuild this Garden.. and I stood.. face down to the ground and kept on crying.. and Now.. I know the true reason why I loved YOU and still loving YOU keeps on growing stronger each day passes by.. it is because YOU care and love.. even the broken people.. even a LOW person like myself.. I.. my Words are so speechless Now.. My Words can't come Out right now.. and I lifted UP my Head and I looked straight.. there is guard siting at the Table.. who is telling the MEN to go.. that it is finished.. and has to wait for the Next Year around.. as I am looking at the Two Letters.. and the Friend who is with me.. My Heart breaks.. I really wanted to see YOU Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I really wanted to tell you who I am.. the boy you saw at the Garden.. I have grown Now and came to protect and to defend YOU.. NOW I must have to go back and wait another year.. and as I would turn to walk away.. a Guard runs and stops Me with the friend.. and I would show the Guard the Official Stamp Letter.. the Seal from the COMMANDER who was the CHIEF in the military Arts.. and the Guard just could not believe the seal.. and He ran with the Official Seals.. and YOU were standing by the table.. and the Guard shows YOU.. the Letter and the Official Letter seal.. and YOU do know this Commander.. He was at the TOP of his TIME.. who was protecting YOUR FATHER the KING.. PEH HA.. the Guard comes to get me and the friend.. and We both would walk behind the Guard.. and I lifted UP my Head and I see YOU there.. I see you standing and waiting by the table.. and I started to cry.. showing YOU the JOY and the sorrows and It has been such a Long time.. but YOU are so Beautiful.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. you are so Beautiful.. I am looking at the rain falling down the Sky.. looking across.. I see the Door where I sleep.. it is opened.. the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU is inside that ROOM.. I needs to go and get it.. My Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. Your Picture.. the Art Sketch Paper.. when I was Young.. the paper that YOU gave to Me.. I had to get the permission from the Artist Boy who drew that Picture of YOU.. I remember he told Me.. if He gets Caught drawing the Picture.. If a Guard catches or Any Officials who works for Your Father the King.. PEH HA.. he can be Put to death.. but He went and drew that Picture for me.. I saw Him get caught.. He was dragged into the Prison.. I could Not believe what has happened to that BOY.. who died for drawing the Picture of YOU.. I remember the Night I went to visit Him. My Father was able to get Me into the Palace.. being the Head servant who was serving YOU.. I went with my Father.. I saw Him siting alone.. and it just broke my Heart.. He told me.. it is because it is YOU.. the Crown Princess.. it is because YOU are MAH MAH.. the HAWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. any ways He was poor.. living as a Homeless street.. as I hold his hands to thank HIM.. he looked at me and told me.. I have A Dream.. as Long as I have that Dream to conqueror.. to be by YOUR SIDE.. MY CROWN PRINCESS.. MAH MAH.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. who I loved and to serve.. and to Protect.. and told me.. GO ALL IN.. even if it gets me Here like this Young Boy.. it be worth Dying for as long as I can try my Best to get there.. and I cried Loud as He told Me.. Chase my Dreams and Let it come true.. Believe In It.. and something BIG.. GRAND can happen in the end.. I saw the Guards with the Keys.. Unlocks.. AND It was His time to GO.. I screamed Let HIM LIVE.. He did Not do any wrong.. what is Wrong to and the Guard struck me.. I fell and saw that Boy being carried away.. I get UP.. and I ran.. ran after the Guards WHO was taking HIM away.. my Father ran after ME.. grabbed me and told Me.. I will see him again.. and I stood there crying.. as the Boy disappeared into the Night.. and It was raining.. I saw the RAIN falling and I would Cry Out in Loud Voice wailing.. Crown Princess.. WHY is Life Not so fair for the POOR people.. small people like Us.. it is no Fair and I am wiping my tears with my Arms.. and as I am sitting down.. I am crying Looking at the open Door to the Small room.. that Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU is a gift.. the Price has been paid.. some one had to die just to draw that Picture of YOU for Me and It died.. and the Older Man.. the Master.. he has the stick.. holding it UP.. and there is the stick on the ground next to me.. I want that Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. the Cost of Losing a One's Life.. and it is YOU.. My Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH and I grab the stick with my Hand and PULL myself UP.. and my eyes looking at the Older MAN.. and he yells Out Loud and swings the Stick at me and I would go back.. the waters makes me slide back and I would yell in rage and I jump UP with the stick In my hand and I swing the stick and it hits the Old Man's stick. and I jump Up again and swing right left left right and I land on the ground and did a back Kick and Hit the Master on the middle.. and I jump Up again swinging the stick in my hand with full of Rage.. I want that Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU and swinging the stick in my hand left right right left and It knocks the Stick Off his Hand.. and I do a round house kick to knock him on the Ground.. the Older Man.. He is laying on the ground.. as the rain Keeps on falling down.. and I stand holding the stick in my hand.. I am crying.. Just Missing YOU.. wanting to be with YOU.. but Look at me.. I am here stuck Out here.. ALL I want to do is just to see you for ONCE.. But the situation is Not helping me to go anywhere at this Point.. WHAT DO I do Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. the Older man.. the Master gets UP slowly.. and he stands looking at me.. and I see he leaving out of sight.. as I would LOOK at the Open Door to the ROOM.. the Small room where I rest.. and I go inside.. and I am looking.. the Art Sketch Paper.. and drawing Picture of YOU.. this Means everything to me.. I remember putting this Art Sketch Paper.. drawing Picture of YOU.. Putting in back of Me.. walking In the Snow.. all alone.. Not knowing where I was going to go but I even had to leave the Garden.. I told myself.. that I am going to go where YOU are.. Crown Princes.. as I would grab hold onto the Paper.. the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I told YOU through Looking at this Picture.. Someday I will get Close.. even though I may be far right Now.. I know that One day I will see YOU.. I will be close so that YOU know how much I love YOU.. and the Sword.. by the time I see YOU.. I am going to be holding a Sword in my hand.. and the Sword I hold.. it is going to Protect YOU.. my Sword that I have with me will always protect and also defend for YOU.. I will be a man of my words who will do whatever it takes just to be close.. even though I may not able to say the Words I love YOU.. I know that the day will come where YOU will give me the Permission to say it.. as the Next Day Arrives.. the Older man.. the Master.. He put a DUMMY made of WOOD.. Carved it and gave me the WOODEN SWORD STICK to practice.. every Night.. I would walk Out side.. He would should Me the PIN POINTERS where to Hit the Hot Spot to destroy my enemies.. I would stand Alone.. and Most nights the MOON came UP from the Sky.. the Older man.. the Master would behind.. leaving a distance.. as I would hit the DUMMY WOOD with the WOODEN STICK SWORD.. I would be looking at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. I would hold to close to my Chest.. and I would kiss the forehead of the WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH.. MY CROWN PRINCESS.. and I would walk outside into the Night.. LOOKING at the MOON.. I would say.. I will see YOU SOON.. it may seems like a long time Now.. the Older MAN.. the Master tells me.. it be a lot sooner because I am thinking of YOU.. that I have a Dream to Love YOU.. but to Protect.. and to defend YOU for a cause for this Nation you are building.. that I know I needs to be there to see YOU as My True QUEEN.. HWANG WOO MAH MAH.. I want to see YOU as you take your place of Your Father's Spot.. to RULE this NATION as the CONQUEROR.. I want to be there to see with my own eyes before I die.. I can't not delay.. because I want to see YOU soon.. and I would be thinking of YOU.. thinking of protecting YOU and also defending
MAH MAH.. Master looks at me.. He tells me.. it is time for me to GO to see the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. I would stand there as he gives me the Letter.. stamping with the seal for His NAME that I am His student.. I would stand IN the ROOM.. as I am looking at the Letter with the STAMP SEALED.. I would sit.. LOOKING at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. I sat alone.. crying.. It means that I get to finally see YOU.. I have made the promise.. DO you remember.. and I am LOOKING at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. WHEN we were Young.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU came to the Garden.. and I was at the Top of the Hill.. By the tree.. visiting My Mother's grave.. I was with my Father and he wanted too tell me a story.. and I heard the Messenger as he was going Up on the Hill.. and it stopped my Father and we turned to look back.. the Messenger says the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABIN MAH MAH is coming UP.. and Me and My Father.. Both on the Knees Looking on the ground.. YOU came to us.. and it broke my Heart when YOU told me.. it is going to be hard for you to come to this Garden.. and before YOU are going to come the One last Time.. a Prince is going to show UP for the Last time.. and I knew what that meant.. I remember that Day Came.. YOU showed UP with the Prince who wanted to Marry YOU.. My Heart was breaking into Pieces when He came with YOU.. but I made a Promise to YOU.. and that promise is that I will still love YOU.. and that I will go to serve.. and to protect and defend YOU.. even if it means that I can't Love YOU.. but I asked YOU.. can I still Love YOU.. WOULD YOU let me still Love YOU.. but I do remember YOU looked the other way.. WHEN I saw you with the Prince at the Hill top by the Tree.. I did Not want any one there which it was my Mother's Grave.. I just could Not believe it had to happen.. when I think of it Now.. I have never given UP on that Promise.. as I was in the Small ROOM.. holding the Letter with the Stamp sealed of the Older Man.. the Master.. and On the Other Hand is the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. I don't have anything.. I have Nothing really.. But I do have this Heart.. a Heart who never seems to stop but Keeps On loving YOU and I am going to go to YOU.. I will be close to YOU and show YOU.. I am a MAN with a real Words who will do what I will say because I love YOU.. and as I hold the Letter.. there is a servant who belongs to the Older man.. the Master and he became my friend.. and that He too wanted to go to the palace life.. just to protect and the defend for YOU.. as I am looking at the SUN rising UP.. watching the New Recruits of Young Men.. I see YOU sitting on the Horse.. on the White Dress.. but this Time.. YOU have came Off from Sitting and I see YOU walking.. with the Big Crown on top of your Head.. and I turn to LOOK.. with the Seven men.. the friends of Mine.. we turn to face YOU.. and I would say.. SALUTE.. and all of the Men.. even the New Recruits.. More who even joined into the training camp.. ALL goes on the two Knees.. Arms moves forward.. and Lowers the Heads together and I see YOU stop.. MY Heart starts to beat Faster.. as my Heart keeps On running.. ALL these men.. New and Older.. the Military and Generals.. Commanders and Chief Generals.. ALL down on two Knees.. I would pull the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. the Young Boy who drew this Picture of YOU.. as I am looking at it.. My eyes.. watery and fills with Tears and I can feel my tears running Down as I am looking at this Picture.. the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. as YOU pull out the Sword and YOU point at Me.. and I lift UP my Head looking UP at YOU.. My Heart breaks because I do remember this One Young Fellow.. He told me that as Long as I keep dreaming.. and Dreaming of Just Loving YOU.. and to follow my Dreams and my Heart towards YOU.. that One day.. something Big.. something Grand will Happen.. I did Not know what that Meant.. But Now I know what it is Like because I am here today still Loving YOU.. I had no idea why was that young boy saying this to me.. that is before he died.. I saw the Boy's body on the back of a wagon being carried.. on the streets.. a HAY was covered over.. I ran to look at the wagon being pulled by the Horse.. when I stopped.. uncover the STRAY HAY covering.. it was the Same young Boy who gave me this Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. and I would with both hands show YOU.. HWANGTAEJABIN MAH MAH.. and I see you walking closer and YOU stopped.. and YOU looked at the Art Sketch Paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. it is this Picture I kept all of this Time and Just could Not let It go.. But Know I believe I can because my Dreams of Loving YOU and coming this Close.. It has been kept alive.. I want YOU to do the Honor to Burn this For Me.. because Now.. I realize I don't need this One Picture because I see YOU Now.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I am close to YOU NOW.. I love YOU MORE NOW.. so I don't need to go back because I am Now living in the Present.. going forward with YOU to future HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. ALL I want to say to YOU.. I still Love YOU.. I never have given UP that Hope and dreams of Loving YOU.. I hope that NOW you can see my true Heart.. the real Heart of Mine who never stopped Loving you this Far.. all I wanted to say to YOU CROWN PRINCESS.. I love YOU.. I walk out the room.. Pulling out the Art sketch paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. and I just can't stop.. I been thinking of YOU a lot lately.. and I needs to go see YOU.. but How.. and as I am standing out.. I would turn to the Left.. I see the Horse.. and it belongs to the Older Man who teaches me.. maybe this time.. and I would look at the Art sketch paper.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. Crown Princess.. YOU know that YOU may Not see me.. but I will be at the Palace.. I will only be like a Shadow.. like the wind.. YOU can't see Me.. but YOU know that I am there.. knowing because I love YOU.. and I would Fold the Art Sketch paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU in my Back.. and I would walk.. I stop by the Horse.. and I would get back on this Black Horse.. I would hit the Horse likely and the Horse starts to RUN.. as I am riding on the Back of the Horse.. feeling the Wind in my face as the Horse keeps On running down the Road.. all I can think of is YOU.. the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. even though I may not be close.. even though you may Not see Me.. I know that as long as I can see YOU.. just seeing YOU from a Far is all I can ask for.. even though I may Not be able to say or tell YOU what My Heart truly feels or expresses to YOU.. as Long as my eyes sees that YOU are doing good.. that is ALL I am asking for.. the Horse keeps On running down the road.. all through the Day.. I see this Horse.. this Black Horse keeps on going.. it feels Like me.. Just cannot stop but keeps On going.. as I would watch the SUN Setting down.. when I look on the side.. I see the waters.. and the Horse would run slowly as it stops.. I give this Horse.. the Black Horse some rest.. I get Off the Horse.. Now.. as I would walk close to the waters.. there are group of guys by the waters.. and I would turn to look at One of the guys.. and I would stand still.. as I would pull the Art sketch paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. I just can't stop thinking of YOU.. and it is killing me inside that I can't be close to YOU.. Now.. one of the guys.. he comes closer and takes a LOOK at the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. and Looks at me.. and I tell Him.. Yes.. the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. if YOU are asking me.. I am a Low Born servant.. and I know I can't even Look at YOU.. the Crown Princess.. who am I to love the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. I know that I am Not suppose to ever put my eyes on YOU.. and the penalty for getting caught is Death.. even though I know that If I break this Law.. But.. if YOU take a LOOK at me.. I am already Dead.. so I have No more fear.. I have already broken this Law and just ready to Die any time SOON.. but what can I do.. if I love YOU.. is this My fault.. How is it my fault if My Heart is the One who is causing this Kind of trouble.. this Kind of problem in my life.. I am just going what My Heart truly Needs.. and the Guy looks at me.. He works at the Palace.. and He is the Palace Guard at the Door.. and I just could Not believe.. he came just for a break with Other friends who works at the Palace.. they are all guards at the door.. and I just could Not believe.. He is going to help me to take to where YOU are.. tells me Not to tell any one because.. My Heart.. WHICH only Loves YOU.. as I would watch the waters on this Night.. I just could Not sleep.. but.. for the Longest time.. it has been so long since I saw YOU.. it is a Picture of YOU when YOU are YOUNG.. Now.. the Guy who came with his friends.. one of them had an Art Sketch Picture.. but it is the recent Picture some one drew.. and the guy's friend showed me.. as I took into my hands.. YOU just blew my Mind.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU have become so Beautiful.. when did YOU grew UP looking so Beautiful Like this.. and as I am looking at the Art sketch Paper.. the recent drawing of YOU.. My eyes could Not Help.. but my tears.. it just could NOT let it sit and I felt.. my tears just ran down as I am looking at the recent Picture.. the Art sketch paper.. the drawing of YOU.. and I am wondering.. the Guy looks at me.. even his friend Loves YOU too.. I am thinking.. I know there must be More but.. it does Not matter with me.. as the Sun starts to rise.. the Guy.. he came with
MAH MAH.. Into the back gates they go.. as the Horses all slow down.. the Guy who I first talked too.. He gets out of the Horse and He points at the Chamber on TOP.. that is where YOU are.. the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. the Other Guard tells me that YOU are not there.. that the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. is at the training ground.. and HE is the One who leads.. as I get off the Black Horse.. walking across on the Other side.. and there is the Fence.. as I walk with the Other Guard.. I would stop.. from the back.. I pull out the Recent.. Art sketch Paper.. the drawing Picture of YOU.. as grown.. I just can't believe you have grown this Much.. so much Prettier and never imagined YOU be this Beautiful in my life.. Now the Other Guard stops and looks back.. I just can't believe.. I am going to see the Crown Princess.. do YOU not see this.. LOOK.. I am at the palace.. and going to get to see closer LOOK at the HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. it is Like a Dream come true.. I was truly worried about.. How am I going to see YOU.. I know that I have No business at the Palace. NO guards are going to let me In but.. it is a true Miracle that I am here.. and get to meet.. the Other Guard looks and smiles.. and He turns to lead the way.. as I am following HIM.. in my hands.. I am holding the Art Sketch Paper.. the RECENT drawing picture of YOU.. and I see the other Guard.. He stands by the fence.. and He stops.. and I am walking.. my Heart.. It is beating so Fast.. why do I feel so excited.. why is My Heart beating.. is it beating or dancing from the Inside.. and I stop by the Fence.. and as I let down the Art Sketch Paper.. the Recent drawing picture of YOU.. I see YOU stand there.. the Other Guard points.. that is the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. who is in control in that training ground.. and I see YOU from the distance.. and there are many MEN.. the new recruits as YOU are the One over seeing and teaching them with the Stick.. and My Heart.. Are you really holding the Sword.. the way of the swordsmanship.. as YOU turn toward the Fence.. YOU see two men.. and YOU stop.. showing the form of the Arts of swordsmanship and LOOKS.. as I see YOU looking at me and the Other guard.. It just can't be.. is it really YOU.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. and of course YOU don't know who I am because it has been such a Long time I saw YOU.. and I would kneel.. two knees.. and the Other Guard kneels with me on two knees.. Head Looks on the ground.. arms forward.. and I see YOU are coming.. walking over to the Fence.. and I just can't look at YOU.. why can't I breathe.. why is it so Hard for me to breath and YOU stop by the fence.. and the Other Guard would answer YOU.. and YOU turn to LOOK at me asking me.. and I would lift UP my Head.. and I would LOOK at Your eyes.. DO YOU not remember Me.. right Now I am at the Older man's House.. he is my master my teacher at this Point.. but.. YOU don't remember Me.. and I see YOU looking and with Question.. it is me.. at the Garden.. when YOU came Long ago.. when we were younger.. and my Father who was the Head over the servants.. who served the King but was servant to the CROWN PRINCESS.. which is YOU.. and my Hand went back to Pull out the Art sketch Paper.. the Drawing picture of YOU.. and I lifted it UP before Your eyes and I see your hands grab hold unto.. DO YOU not remember this Picture.. this Art sketch paper.. the drawing of YOU.. when we were little.. before YOU left.. I asked a Boy.. and HE had to get your Permission.. and YOU allowed that BOY to draw YOU and the Boy would give me this Art sketch Paper.. the drawing picture of YOU.. the boy say.. I am good to have this Picture.. the Art Sketch paper.. this drawing picture of YOU.. by the tree.. before YOU told me that YOU could never come back to the Garden.. that WHEN I grew to be older.. for YOU to know.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. YOU told me to bring this to YOU so that YOU will remember who I am.. and it was YOU who allowed me to have this.. to keep this.. that one day when I come to this palace.. when I bring this to show YOU who I am.. YOU will know that it was ME.. the lowly born servant at the garden who never stopped Loving YOU.. I came all the way just to tell YOU that I have grown.. and YES.. that I am going to enter the king's service and to Be a Palace Guard.. so that I can come close to YOU.. to protect YOU and to defend this nation.. I told you this when I was little.. when I was young.. I told YOU.. before YOU left for good.. I told YOU I promise I will come.. and as I am LOOKING UP at YOU from kneeling on two Knees.. YOU looked at me.. the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. and I see your smile.. so YOU do Remember everything right.. it is that Boy at the garden.. who wanted to give YOU a flower.. Now.. it is Not just a flower.. but I will show YOU a SWORD to protect YOU and this Nation.. and will FIGHT on your Behalf.. the Other guard looks at me.. and As I am looking at the New Recruits.. I would look back.. and I see the Seven Friends who are behind me.. there are two who has been there for me all this time.. the Other Guard who lead me to YOU.. and the First Guard who talk to me at the waters.. Who has been helping me to get closer to YOU.. and as I would LOOK by the Fence.. I see YOU.. the Crown Princess.. WANGSEJABI MAH MAH.. as I am holding the stick in the Hand.. telling me that I should train these new Men.. the YOUNG MEN who are the recruits.. and as I would pull back.. I would pull the Art Sketch paper.. the Drawing Picture of YOU.. it is when YOU were Little.. the Boy WHO gave it to ME.. who told me that I have the Permission from YOU.. the Crown Princess.. HWANGTAEJABI MAH MAH.. LOOKING at the Tree.. by the Garden.. I am always thinking about the Garden because it was the first TIME.. when I saw YOU coming.. riding on the Horse.. YOU wanted to see How the Garden feels.. it was when I saw YOU there.. when I started to LOVE you at the Garden.. as I am looking at one of the new Recruit.. He looks at me and swings the WOODEN SWORD at me.. and He misses as I go back.. with the WOODEN SWORD stick I am holding.. I would swing Forward and It hits the new recruit and He falls to the Floor.. to the ground.. I am looking at the Moon.. I just wish that YOU know my Heart.. MAH MAH.. CONG JU NIM.. I know that I can't go with you right Now.. Because I want YOU to be at the Seat.. to be at Your Throne.. to Rule over and to take the seat that belongs to YOU.. and I am standing by the tree.. on the Hill side top.. looking UP to the sky.. Looking at the stars shining across the sky.. MAH MAH.. I remember when I first stood here.. running UP the Hill when I was a Young Boy.. My Father was standing next to the tree.. and I would yell out loud.. and my Father smiling looking at me Running UP to him.. and I am holding the Art Sketch Paper.. the Picture of YOU.. and I would show my Father.. and He looks at YOU.. that is the Princess.. CONG JU NIM.. after My Father passed away.. I remember walking UP the Hill side.. and I would stand next to this Tree.. and I am holding unto the Art Sketch Paper.. the Picture of YOU.. and I would turn too look.. I can see the Palace.. It seems so Far away.. and I would be looking UP to the sky.. Looking at the stars shining above me.. and that Moon.. it has never seems to change.. it would appear the same way as being a Young Boy.. But I still had hopes and dreams.. that One day I am going to see YOU.. that One day I am going to hold your hands and to stand by this Tree.. the same tree I would run up and down.. many broken hearts.. broken tears I would cry.. I would be shouting Loud.. Looking across.. Looking at the Palace.. WHY did you have to come into my Heart MAH MAH.. CONG JU NIM.. why do you have to live In my Heart.. it hurts because I love YOU.. I know that I should be more happier than ever to Love YOU.. but instead.. many nights I would shed these tears.. feeling so Lost.. feeling so lonely and just to be loved.. Will the Princess.. CONG JU NIM.. MAH MAH.. CONG JU MAH MAH.. will you ever see my through.. would you ever see my Heart.. can YOU feel the Heart.. the One Heart that I have kept inside which weeps most of the time.. missing YOU.. wanting to be close.. to get close.. to Love YOU.. to held YOU in my arms and to tell YOU.. whisper in your Ears How much I love YOU.. and I would watch the Night.. wondering can My voice ever be heard.. I don't care.. as long as YOU can hear me.. if I tell YOU that I love YOU.. will you want to hear my words.. my voice of telling YOU.. I can tell YOU thousand times.. but will you want to hear it over and over and over again if I tell YOU that for Me.. it is the greatest pleasure to tell YOU from My Heart because I know deep within me I love YOU.. I would even stand by this tree.. when I saw the dark clouds gathered.. I can hear the roaring of the Thunder knowing that it is going to send rain.. showers and heavy rain down on me.. I would watch and wait.. as I feel the wind changing towards me and I start to see the rain drops.. falling from the Sky.. I would be standing by this tree.. Looking across.. looking at the Palace wondering.. If I go to YOU.. will you open your arms out to me.. will you tell me MAH MAH.. I am able to come to YOU.. will you allow me to step into that Palace.. and I would be wondering.. How do I get to that place from where I am standing.. I want to Go.. I want to run to YOU.. I want to be where YOU at.. If I go.. will you accept Me.. will I be invited to stand close to YOU.. and I would start to watch the rain fall.. Looking at the Art Sketch paper.. the Picture of YOU.. I remember it was after I saw YOU coming to the Garden
BABY TIGER, YOU SEND A TEXT MESSAGE TO ME THAT YOU ARE COMING TO VISIT ME AND I WONDER WHY WILL YOU COME IF YOU HAVE NO FEELINGS FOR ME WHY COME IF YOU DO NOT LOVE ME ANY MORE WHY COME TO HURT ME WHEN I ALREADY FELT SO HORRIBLE RIGHT NOW AND YOU TOLD ME IN 30 MINUTES YOU BE COMING, SO I GO HIT THE SHOWER AND THE COLD WATER RUNS THROUGH BABY TIGER, I CAN FEEL IT WAS WAKING ME UP AND AFTER I WASN DONE, BRUSIHING MY TEETH, I FELT LIKE CRAP THO AND THE TEXT MESSAGE CAME AGAIN AND IT WAS YOU WHO TOLD ME TO COME OUT AND I GO OUT THE DOOR AND I LOOK UP TO THE SKY BABY TIGER, THE CLOUD STARTED TO BE DARKEN ALL OF A SUDDEN AND I WOULD SEE THE CHANGING OF THE SKY WAS GREY NOW AND IT FELT LIKE IT WAS ABOUTS TO RAIN AND I DID NOT HAVE AN UMBRELLA WITH ME AND I STARTED TO WALK OUT AS I WAS WALKING DOWN THE SIDEWALK AND I WOULD GO DOWN TO THE MAILBOX I TURNED LEFT FROM THE MAILBOX AND I SAW A CAR, IT WAS A NICE RED CAR BUT IT WAS NOT YOUR CAR, BABY TIGER, AND I BEGAN TO WALK TO MEET YOU AND A MAN GETS OUT OF A RED CAR AND HE STOPS YOU AND I PAUSE TO LOOK AT YOU AND THAT MAN HE RUNS TO THE PASSENGER SIDE OF THE DOOR AND HE STOPS YOU AND I COULD NOT BELIEVE WHAT I AM SEEING I BEGAN TO BE THINKING, IS THIS THE REASON WHY YOU CALLED ME IT THIS THE REASON WHY YOU TEXTED ME, BABY TIGER, IS HE THE REASON WHY YOU BREAK MY HEART IS HE THE REASON WHY YOU TOLD ME TO COME OUT IN THIS GREY SKY WHAT IS IT THAT YOU WANT FROM ME IF YOU ARE HAPPY, WHY ARE YOU HURTING ME MORE AS I AM WATCHING ALL THIS DRAMA TAKING PLACE AND THAT MAN HOLDS YOUR HANDS, AND I SEE YOU BE SMILING AT HIM BABY TIGER, AND HE IS SMILING BACK AT YOU, AND I SEE HIS FACE GETTING CLOSE TO YOURS AND IT SEEMS LIKE YOU DID NOT CARE THAT I WAS THERE STANDING IN YOUR PRESENCE WHEN YOU CALLED ME TO COME TO YOU TO MEET YOU AND LIKE THIS I WAS RAGED IN MADDNESS I WANTED TO GO INSIDE AND SOMETHING STOPPED ME SOMETHING STOPPED ME FROM GOING INSIDE MY HOUSE THE SKY GREW DARKER AND I HEAR A THUNDER ROARING OUT LOUD BABY TIGER, I SAW THE LIGHTENING FLASHING THROUGH THE SKY AND I KNEW IT IS GOING TO RAIN HEAVY, AND A RAIN DROP FALLS FROM THE SKY AND IT HITS MY HEAD AND I FELT SOMETHING, AND ANOTHER DROP FALLS FROM THE SKY AND IT HITS MY HEAD AGAIN THE MAN OPENS THE PASSENGER DOOR AND HE GETS OUT THE UMBRELLA FOR YOU BABY TIGER, WHY HURT ME WHEN I LOVE YOU THE MOST I BE THE BEST LOVER, I CAN BE THE BEST LOVER BUT WHY BREAK MY ROOT BABY BEAR THE DOOR RINGS CUZ SOMEONE PUSHES THE DOOR BELL AS I WALK TO THE DOOR AND OPEN THE DOOR, IT IS YOUR MAN WHO STOOD THEREHE LOOKS AT ME BABY TIGER, AND I WAS LOADED IN TEARS, HE COMES IN AND HE SITS ON MY COACH AND I BE TELLING HIM MY HEART WHAT IS THE MEAING OF ME LIVING THIS LIFE IF I CANNOT BE WITH YOU, YOU ARE EVERYTHING TO ME AND I LOVE YOU BABY TIGER, YOU ARE MY ALL AND I WANT YOU TO KNOW MY HEART BABY BEAR!! THROUGH THE MANY LONELY NIGHTS THAT I FEEL WITHOUT YOU I AM NOTHING I BE MISSING YOU. I MISS YOU SO MUCH THAT I WANNA DIE BABY BEAR, I WISH THAT YOU KNOW THIS HEART OF MINE HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU, YOU JUST DO NOT KNOW HOW MUCH BABY TIGER, YOU HAVE STOLEN THIS HEART, YOU ARE IN MY HEART THAT I FEEL AND I FEEL LIKE I AM DYING INSIDE WITHOUT YOU BABY BEAR AND I CANNOT STOP THINKING OF YOU CUZ YOU ARE MY EVERYTHING TO ME I LOVE YOU BABY BEAR, I LOVE YOU, OH YOU JUST DO NOT KNOW HOW I LOVE YOU BABY TIGER, AND IT FELT LIKE A HAMMER HITTING AGAINST MY HEAD AND I LOOKED AT THE CLOCK, I LOOKED AT MY CELL PHONE AND HAD A MISSED CALL IT WAS YOU BABY BEAR WHO CALLED ME ON THE PHONE AND RIGHT WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO CLOSE MY EYES
Baby Tiger, Sometimes I feel it's only me who has the true love, and yours is just a fantasy love. I have put my heart and soul into the past months of my life and you. I feel all the effort How someone can think of someone almost every single second, minute, and hour of every day! You're my baby, you're my love, you're my best friend, you're everything to me right now, so why, tell me why, why is it so hard to just move forward? It seems. Baby Tiger, You are truly amazing in everyway, the good and the bad! There was a time when I just didn't think it was possible for me to love again, the way I love you and yet. Baby Tiger, I love to imagine you holding me even when we are not together. I love to imagine you and me forever; I love to imagine ways to always make our relationship better. I love to imagine how we will make up after a having fight. Baby Tiger, I love to imagine what we'll do once you read this letter tonight. Words cannot describe what goes through my mind when I think of you! It boggles my mind Baby Tiger, My Love, We are not together! I sit here and ask myself how this is possible that two people, who care so much about one another, not be together! I love you and adore you! I feel we understand and know each other all too well sometimes!
