Expert relationship advice from experienced psychotherapist Dr. Jeanette Raymond for managing thorny and painful issues such as lying and cheating, intimacy problems, finding the right partner, fighting and conflict, betrayal and trust, loneliness and anxiety about being good enough.
Whether you are dating, in a relationship, married with or without a family, divorced or bereaved, you will identify with the real life examples of people struggling just like you with jealousy, envy, fear, and frustration. Each video identifies a frustrating experience you have with loved ones such as feeling left out, feeling unheard or disrespected and gives you practical advice on how to take action on your own behalf so that you are comfortable in relationships that matter to you
Am dating a woman with paranoia personality disorder, accused me all the time of doing bad things. The problem she has a 4 year boy and a 11 year old boy with no discipline how do I make this work
Brilliant analysis combined with good advice, I just wonder how you can manage to keep your cool when her relentless nagging becomes your clinical cardiac problem, or when your ability to drive a motorcar is so undermined it puts casual pedestrians' lives in danger.
You need to talk about narcissism. The stepfather you spoke about at the end was a narcissist destroying the family. That's literally my life. I'm using my boyfriends you tube my name is Ashley. I just turned 40 and I'm not married or have any kids. It destroyed my life. Only now after learning all of this do I fee like I have hope for a normal life.
My mom passed away 21 days ago. We were enstranged for the past 2 years. It started when I finally found my voice at age 57yrs. I am 59 years old now. My mom has always been present but never saw me. At least thats what I felt. The only reason I started to 'matter' to my family, my mom in particular is when I became the most successful of all his kids. At first I enjoyed the new found attention. My opions suddenly mattered but my feelings never did. I became the money bag everyone stayed close to for the benefits. I spoke out 2 years ago, cut all financial support (she wasn't on the street, didn't need my money but wanted it) and as I feared, I became a nothing again. In fact she told me so. I am a jumble of emotions. Where do I start?
My mom passes away in march this year. Yet, I didn't feel nothing towards her. Sure, it came some moments I cried, but nothing big at all. Why is that, you may ask? Well, let me tell a story short: Mom was a manipulative person. Often, she used me as a threat. Later on, she supported incest within the family. Which I condemned. After that, almost ten years estrange, I already cried for her. At least it feels like it. I try to be open minded, letting my memories of her be fully wide open. Even I had some good memories of her, I had worse memories of her.
my father and I were estranged. He was a toxic, manipulative and abusive. He died . I dont regret cutting him out of my life. Not at all. I completely agree, I am mourning who he should have been, the role he should have played. I didnt have a Dad that made me feel safe. He was my first bully who got off on emotionally torturing those around him for his sick amusment. I am still sitting here, crying because my siblings and I.... we deserved better! That thought keeps playing over wnd over in my head. It has nothing to do with how much money he made or the house we lived in. I was a kid, I didnt care. It had to do with him abusing us. I am so envious and confused by people who have good fathers. it sounds like a dream. Its so hard when you only get 1 Dad and mine just happened to be a piece of work. I know life is unfair, it still sucks. My siblings and I deserved a really great Dad. Everyone does. I fooled myself in the beginning thinking I didn't have to mourn. I thought if he wasn't worthy of mourning I wouldn't gave to.
I'm person with comlex trauma and my partner when starts painting his paranoia on me, its really a dissaster, I'm reliving this hell on and of, I feel like I can't take this anymore. I love him very deeply, but I don't see any light on the end. Bc this paranoia comes again and again. How long can you stay and be loving, when they hurting you so much?
Great but can you speak a little faster? It’s hard to follow along you speak so slow today. Everything leaves at a quick pace. It’s hard to pay attention.
Wow not one of these sentence was uttered from my therapist when my mom died. If I wasn't so old I'd become a therapist because I've gone to therapy for so many years I have a zero respect for those losers all they want is money and the insurance is just nasty
Patricia Evans speaks of the “dream girl” and the partner’s struggle with understanding you as an individual instead of an extension of themselves. Do you find this to be true as well? That the criticism is the response of you threatening their fantasy of how you should be?
I never knew love and support from my parents, so I left home at 16. I haven't seen them for decades and we live in different countries. I just learned that my father died. I feel so guilty. I don't hate them. Now I've become delusional thinking about the relationship I could have had. I am confused.
I just found your video and yes, I did wake up when he broke up now. He asks us to keep in touch but can’t be as bf/gf. We’re still text gm gn some time but no emotional. I still love him. How can I reconnect again.😢😢😢
Hi please what should I do? I saw my Single parent step mom and her boss having sex in our room, and am her step son leaving with her, but they didn't see me, she divorced my dad for his bad behavior.
I wish I watched this video earlier. My ex did not have paranoid thoughts towards me but instead to my family especially my sister. She thought my sister was out to ruin her life without any adequate evidence
I just got blamed by my stepdad because I wasn’t picking up my mothers calls when she did all kinds of abusive shit towards me and she went to the doctors recently and they diagnosed her for something and she has to take it easy I have CPTSD BECAUSE OF THEM
I have repeated thoughts of just letting my wife have our house and she can go find a job to take care of the kids. Nothing I do is appreciated. When that happens, perhaps the best thing to do is show them what it’d be like without me.
What if it is way more subtle than abuse and if your dad at times still took that role. Very ambivalent. And now died. Sometimes I feel like I’m not entitled to cry too much, other times I feel like I’m not being thankful enough.
I appreciate his constructive criticism but he had a horrible unloving childhood and doesn't understand it's about balance... help me sure, but also think about ways you appreciate me. I'm guilty too.. I did not think about things from his point of view when we were younger... I now recognize his moodiness.. how he will have a harsh tongue when he's frustrated. Thanks for the advice.
This is effective, but not in every situation. 🤷♀️ Those toxic complainers never stop that, because they have got used to it over time, and it has become their nature, so the other one always suffer in these kind of relationships. 😕 So doctor, try to give us more ways to manage life with these kind of complaining toxic partners, specially for married couples, whose seperation solutions is not a possible solution. 😕
I'm not my fathers partner I'm his son he's very narcissistic and full of double standards that's why I can't trust him . Plus I have anxiety attacks !
Thank you Dr. Raymond for this. I actually experience it as fluctuating between expressive and stoicism my partner. Whereas I lean more to being emotional and he's quite stoic. Yet at times we switch roles. Especially when he feels like he's losing me. Problem is the change never sets in because we are stuck in our roles. As in, we revert back into our comfort zones. I'm at a point that I'd rather break away from him but I'm so attached/addicted to his energy and his way of organizing life. I'm learning how to cope on my own without using him to balance myself out. It's so very hard but I need to do this for the both of us.
Is Tyler cooperative when Nicola tries to implement a task for which she has a vision. Is he putting his energy to facilitate her vision, or is he being a stick in the wheel by trying to delay, dis-suade, distract or oppose. Is his energy working with her or against her. I think this is an important piece that can point out the root cause. As I always say, if you didn't have a strong vision or opinion to lead on a certain task to begin with, then at least support your partner's vision and be a team member. What happens with men-child personalities is that they neither lead nor follow and they put their heels in the sand when it's time to cooperate on a task or a project.
This describes how I feel perfectly unfortunately the advice for what to do is really vague. I’m not sure how to “leave it on his side of the wall” in real terms. Does that mean I just ignore it. Let him say it but just don’t react? Then as far as the “You don’t say anything nice about me” bit, I’ve done that many times and it is just an invitation to fight. To defend myself from the question of “aren’t these things important? Shouldn’t he have the right to say them if I objectively do them wrong?” He’s trying to motivate me and claims that saying nice things doesn’t work. I’m not sure even if maybe he’s justified in his criticisms. I do screw up a lot.
Thank you. My youngest (half) brother reached out in a text to let me know my dad has a cancerous tumor on his face that is spreading to his brain and is so weak he may not survive immunotherapy. My reply was, "Thank you for letting me know. " It was all I could muster. We have not had a relationship for over 9 years. I have forgiven him and my step mom for the abuse and the neglect when we were younger. I just cannot be there for them. My brother is going to have to be the one. I.just.can't. I am moving in a different direction as an aging adult. 😔 Thank you for the strength behind this video. It was comforting.
In such relationship always Both ladies are great ladies. Each one is a real woman among women. God bless such families. May our society must learn from this triplet and begin a new trend leads to a healthy family where jealousy and envy have no place.
