Heyyaa Friends! I've taken a few year break from youtube, so much change (internally and externally) and major life shifts through out. Hope to be back soon to share where my heads been at!
A song that was dedicated to me by a very cool subscriber~ COSMOBLISS ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-k2NERMfT2YQ.html
Generally: Great topic, super important! I found out for myself, not(!) judging others based on assumptions, be it strangers or friends or family members (or cats) that is something I never learn to a level, that I correctly don't do it automatically, but, I have to remind me every day, every week, in each age again and again: "don't do it, it is not logical and causes confusion or fights, use your mouth and ask just if something could(!) be different than expected". My judges and assumptions come often from wishes of harmony and the wish of an easy doing things together, what is generally nothing bad, and that's why it comes automatically back so often. While you talked, something new came into my mind: maybe an other reason, why it is so difficult not to assume and judge things is, because in childhood this question doesn't exist. Remember, when we were let's say 5 years old: we just saw other people how it automatically happened and kids are allowed to think wrong things, and even when we got told off or got corrected, kids weather cry then or they addapt in a passive way but don't think about it. Examples: 1.) unimportant case: as a 5 year old I see someone on the street carrying something heavy: assumption "this dude is cool, strong, and he likes carrying this stuff around"- if that is totally wrong, it doesn't matter 2.) Mummy goes to grocery with me, and we buy things that we need: "she likes shopping with me in the grocery" - if mummy doesn't like it at all, it doesn't matter for the child and if there will be a fight about a product in the shop, the kid has then just this fight, it does never think about what was the assumption before etc. ... I can't explain very well with these examples but I guess you get it, how "free" the assuptions could be as a child and so, it is a hard training as adult, not to do it anymore. (Amongst other reasons, why we would like to judge too quickly sometimes) (Without your child in the background I wouldn't have got this thought.) For me, the thought of curiosity and exploring "new lands"/new sides of the people we are together with is a good energy to question quick assumptions and change it to the "maybe, this could be all different, find out, if he/she means it all different than expected", and the then possible surprise I try to see as something like when I was traveling and found unexpected places and cool atmosphere...
I totally get what you’re saying about the innocent and almost unaware beginning of how assumptions are created in childhood. Kids make them all the time! So it makes sense we still carry this natural trigger into adulthood. And they aren’t inherently wrong, just have to make sure we aren’t feeling into the negative ones :) the gift of being an adult is being able to rationalize these ideas, this is what children lack, rationality
@@cosmobliss that's nice and strong positive energy to say, it's a gift, that we can do as adults things differently like kids, although it costs sometimes quite an energy to use these capabilities. 😊
First: I like videos with baby- or kids- or animal sounds in the background. I super remember many, many years ago when a youtuber made lifestrems and there was always something going on in the background. Why not. That's life.
I love that you enjoy the realness of that, I try so hard not to have them in it because I’ve always thought people didn’t want noise in the background, but this gives me peace of mind hearing this! :) with them every single day every single minute all day every day so many more to come with them playing around me!
@@cosmobliss I have no children but my best frieds a 5 years old one and I see very often at the mother/parents, who have zero help of a grandmother or siblings or so, that the "every single day, every single minute all day thing" is the biggest load for parents without often help like you guess don't have. No one knows how it is, not having "the grandmother" or someone like this frequently around, surely I talk about a grandmother, who would help in a smart way, not a destructive grandmother, which exist also often. (I try to help often my friends, but only one dude like me in this case is not often enough). I really admire parents or esp. mothers who raise the kids without big family help around, kind of like I admire workers of big construcktion sites who work hard in winter and summer, at rain or big heat. Maybe we should see parenting paralle to skyscraper builders, they build a skyscraper, you build level by level life/childhood/memories for your children. (And also a nice symbol: workers on a construction site also sometimes do things not pefectly, but although there happen maybe some little mistakes in some details of the construcktion, everything will work in the end and it will be a nice, impressive and shiny skyscraper!)
* We all make assumptions. They help us get through massive information. If we're wrong, we need to release our error quickly, and move to the next new. * Life isn't fair. * Life isn't real. This life is for lessons, and when we leave the body, we go back home to complete love, knowledge and endless freedom. * Our group is always there for us. * Everything is love, everything is God.
I couldn’t agree more. We all do make assumptions but I do believe if we chose to consciously be more mindful those assumptions will not intrusively create a negative perception for us. I think remaining curious and open is sooo essential. It’s so human to judge things for what we think they are, but we have the power to not fully live by them as facts. I swear if I would have let my assumptions of others affect my choices I would not have made the friends that I have now, I would not have been able to heal so deeply with the people I love most.
My favorite quote i came up with years ago. Everything happens for a reason. But i still question it looking at life in Palestine. I wish i could have God explain things to me. I guess if i had it all at once i wouldn't retain most. Maybe reincarnation is real. It would explain a lot. But how much less interesting would my life be to me if i knew what was coming. Rock on kiddo.
I often resort to the idea of reincarnation as well when it comes to trying to make sense of the world and the inevitable and almost unfair way life can be sometimes. We think sooo similarly, and yes the curiosity of not knowing is what keeps us going
Anthroposophy explains reincarnation and to me makes sense. But there's a lot to read through to make a conclusion. I find most people just don't have an open enough mind.
@squiduardsquarepants568 I believe it’s proven everywhere too, but we are so conditioned to think otherwise because of our culture and also because Christianity preaches against it, (even where there are examples of it In the Bible!! People are too afraid to be open to new ideas even when they are ancient haha
Your painting today, reconciling these opposites contained within you, the you that sees sunshine and the you that sees rain, how do all these forms of you combine to form *you*? So much can change just from one day to the next. I've watched a few of your other videos now and it's inspiring to watch you share your insights along this trajectory into the future you're travelling. I worry about you sometimes. But, maybe if I didn't, your channel wouldn't be as interesting? Which is what worries me. I hope you won't let bringing the world along for this ride with you drive you to further extremes, which can happen. *You're real, authentic, honest* -- and that's very valuable, but also leaves you vulnerable. Nevermind, I'm sure you'll be fine. Anyway, I also wanted to mention that in Buddhism "dhukkha" aka "suffering" aka "not-enoughness" is inescapable whenever we fool ourselves into believing we are this separate, permanent "self" having our subjective experience each moment. Simply knowing this can sometimes help with it, or so I've heard. They say another thing that can help is just *sitting and breathing*... 🙏🧘♂ Warm wishes of peace and love. ☮💟
I'm not your "shrink" , and I don't have a key to resolve all your feelings.. I wish you could accept that all these feelings exist... There are moment that one feels sad and other moments that you feel happy. Life is that way and you don't need to worry about the both. We all are confronted with moods, things that happen, luck and bad luck. Meditation in the traditional Boedhistic way will make you realize, that all these emotions come and go. You survived ten years of depression ! Praise yourself for that. When I look at your videos like this one , I feel compassion and wish you all the best in the world. I wonder if you are trying to figure it out all by yourself ( I don't see your husband in any of these movies). I assume he also feels compassion with you in these darker moments. Your instagram shows lots of "happy" pictures. Travelling, enjoying nice weather, being with your husband and the kids. It does not mean that there are no sad periods or worries, but there's a lot to be grateful for. Maybe sharing with your husband, and cuddling up with him can carry you through these moments.. Boeddha says: "Everything comes and goes" So give it some time, but don't hang on to feeling sad. I'm a musician and I know that pain and loss often generate the most beautiful songs. So feel free to "paint your sorrow away" and later look at these amazing creations...
I like to just go to the river and sit in the water or just go to a nice shady park and walk around barefoot. My doctor put me on SSRI medications...but they just make feel me a zombie.
I try to burry my split feelings by watching this video. Never before since yesterday I feel so hopefull, and hopeless at the same time. I also struggle constantly by thinking about my own faults or weekness. It's great that you are capable to create videos or I mean, that you just do it , and be it only to show what you feel today. I don't dare to show my face and feelings online. A new thought came into my mind while watching your video: if someone wonders, why do we crack so often just in this moment, when we came out of a negative phase and just had picked up some positive thoughts, positive aims and hope? Why often, just one or several hours later our mood falls suddenly deeper than before and we feel suddenly so week and clueless and in a grey, sad state. Maybe because of this, I thought now: The positive thoughts, hope and positive plans we just had were in reality positive answers just to one of our problems. There was one thing, a bad memory, a bad feeling, bad psycho-thing like a certain fear, we had struggled with the days before and maybe we had found now something constructive to overcome this one thing, why we feel happy and relieved. But these finally lighter feelings opens our negative tunnel vision to the whole normal life and then: subconsciously our clever brain kicks in and says to us, as said more subconsciously "but if we get now the normal and whole life in our view, Mr., there are two, three... more big piles of SHlT from our past, pressing severely down on our soul, they are not solved, Mr." or differently said, our inner voice says: "there are still these couple of massive wounds from our past, Sir, these wounds are not healed by the one new positive thing! You are still in a crappy life and far away from what you like". But we don't get these subconsciously thoughts, because "these negative moods can't be, haven' t I been happy right now because I found a goal and a method to overcome this and that hopelessness/blockade/...?" And again, it helps to talk or write or paint about everything, what hits us, and be it a very incomprehensible quickly appearing new negativity, we first don't understand. I try now, to be just a bit more nicely to myself and not let sh** from the past get such an important place in my heart and thoughts. (Thanks for reading, was self therapy to write this.) Your art is wonderful. Picasso! And the word "whose" is not wrong for me, the picture just says "whose face is there". Noses are very difficult to paint, you painted a great nose, and the tears look also super in shape and everything
I believe you’re onto something. And you describe yourself so well, if you don’t want to share RU-vid videos fine, but you need to get these thoughts out there. Pretty profound. And thank you for all the kindness friend :’) and of course for all the support
There is so much power in sitting with your emotions, rather than suppressing them . I think ( for me , personally anyway ) that a lot of my anxiety is caused by not always staying in the present moment. Thinking about yesterday and tomorrow, instead of right now .
The unanswered prayer part is beautiful. Just because someone doesn't answer doesn't mean someone isn't listening. It's like looking up and going " Hey God, you got me?" And God says "Nah, You Do though" 😊
Yes I love that, that’s how I feel, I feel like so often if we don’t get the answer we want from god we instantly try to disprove the existence of a god, which to me isn’t fair or valid enough when there is so much miracle in the world itself
I was pretty sick recently. After the initial hit of fever and nausea was over and I was then just suffering from runny nose pretty much I was still surprised at how disgusting I felt my world to be at the time for some reason. I felt everything was excessively messy and yucky and felt my car for instance was more beat up than usual and I felt irritable driving it despite usually enjoying it.
I find it sad, that our society doesn't valuate what parents often go through to raise the next generations. The older generation when they were parents just say "yes, yes, we have experienced this too. Next topic." And people without kids don't care at all, what struggles parents sometimes go through. I am an old single without kids and appreciate very much the fights of parents. But I am only able to recognize and appreciate because my best friends are a couple with a young child and without any help of their parents and I am often there and help and see what hard work they do often, like at nights will ill kids or situations like you had. Once I was at christmas at this family and we all got very sick, all of us 3 adults and the child, like it was with you, but as we were 3 adults and the breakout of the sickness came slightly offset for each adult, we could manage it a littel bit better like in your case. YOU CAN BE VERY PROUD OF WHAT YOU DID. Especially this time, you did very well ❗MOTHERS AND SOMETIMES FATHES SHOULD BE MORE OFTEN PROUD OF THEMSELVES AND THEIR WORK / FIGHT FOR THEIR KIDS AND EVERYTHING‼‼‼Here 2 winner cups for you and your partner🏆🏆
Parenthood is a wild ride. And I agree I often feel totally unnoticed for my hard efforts. Even from my own parents which breaks my heart. Especially since my Husband and I are raising our kids (always have) totally on our own, but across the country with zero help, we get maybe 1 date night a year… lol (out for dinner) and my husband has an insane schedule as an aircraft mechanic who works graves and has to sleep and recuperate all day long and all week.some days I feel like my head is going to blow up, but other days I feel so strong doing it all essentially on my own. It’s little messages like this that make me realize. Damn this is hard work, and it makes sense that I feel burnt out. But I wouldn’t change it for the world
@@cosmobliss oh, your husband works in shift or even "chaotic shift". That is also something, only those people really get what this means, who have worked shift already. I did in the past, not too long, just a few years, but I know now how bad shiift working is for the man and the family/partner etc. For you as mother maybe the following story helps a bit: just one month ago, my best friend with the 5 years old one, was almost totally cracking by being mother 24 for all the past years and the child was more and more difficult. We had thought when he was 4, wow a hard phase, 4 to 5 are the years, where the kids are a mixed bag of understanding more and can do more crazy stuff and want more and always more and get crazily assertive but could also understand more rules but now testing what happens when not following the rules and also, if we are honest, the kids don't really understand "the why" behind rules, short: understand much more now and on the same time understand nothing really, so a wild time, and my friend was completely on the edge now and we were thinking what the hell can we do with this often so crazy and wild child, and suddenly(!), for 2 weeks now, a very calm phase started and the child is very balanced in the mood, plays much more nicely for himself, no conflicts in kindergarten anymore. So, we have to trust that these good phases can also come out of the nowhere that helps then also the mother.
when i get sick, all the energy gets drained away from me. I don't know how u care for others while sick! tbh bravo! Did u take tons of vitamins to help out?
I quite literally don’t know how I do it either, must be totally pure love and devotion? Hahaha I would do anything for my kids even when I’m puking my guts up and have an insane fever, but thanks I’m happy to be coming out of it. And honestly no I couldn’t eat much just drank a ton of water!!
You are a strong person. Somehow, everything is okay. It is definitely not in our nature to remember this truth all the time. But yes, taking time for yourself and removing yourself from the chaos a little each day if you can helps to remember. Remember to trust God. He made you, He knows what you need and when you seek him He will provide. Take the pressure off yourself and lean into the Creator of all things. I'm talking to myself here too. And you're right, this too shall pass. All of it. Commit to trusting that because He made you and loves you He will take care of you. Reminding ourselves of this can help. Much Love!!!!
So much love Katie <3 couldn’t do this without god backing me up, this whole path is so exhausting but I feel lifted in special ways when I’m weak and burning out. God bless you!!
Your suffering and its hard to watch. Maybe a look back at where you came from can heal a little bit. I remember your videos before the kids were born. You struggled to feel comfortable then: the focus on materialistic richness clashed with your spiritual awakening. Then, with the birth of your first child, you blossomed and felt unconditional love for that new creature in your arms.. A second child came and again you felt blessed... Now old feelings show up again. I have no magic wand to erase those depressive feelings, I wish I had ... All I can say is: The true reconciliation lies within yourself: You cannot change the world and the way many people search for fortune or fame.. You cannot save the earth on your own, but your heart is filled with love that you can give to your partner, your kids and the people surrounding you. Meditate and search for inner peace and from there, spread your light. You can do it !!!!
I’ve always loved reading your comments over the years so happy to see you back. And a very personal and in tune message directly to my soul. Thank you for speaking it the way it is, so blunt and raw. I needed this. The oscillation for me between the material, external world taking away my joy, and the internal spiritual blessings bringing me fulfillment are a huge game I play with my mind. Something I need to desperately work on, but you’re totally right my kids are my saving grace for reclaiming that peace and pure love and light. Now I must learn from them and choose to see that more despite the world happening around me. And I absolutely love you saying “the true reconciliation lies within yourself” so absolutely beautifully written, thank you for reminding me of the full scope of what you’ve witnessed. I appreciate it deeply within my being 🤍
I'm right there with ya. I used to watch your videos years ago. I was a lot like you. Wild child and free spirit. A lot has changed for me too. Burnt out. I don't have kids. But karmically I'm facing the consequences of making poor choices that harmed myself and those around me. I don't feel as free as I used to. Because I'm not free. I suppose I put myself here. So all I do is work now. 7 days/wk. Hard heavy labor. Feel so out of touch with myself and the rest of the world. I hope things improve. Seasons come and go. Odds are things will get better. As long as I don't sabotage myself any further. Hope you find your way out of the burnout. And I hope I do too
I believe in us, the key like you said is to not self sabotage and work with a goal in mind. And to live as balanced as we can, burn out is so real and it’s important to notice those feelings and take a step back when it arrives. I hope you give yourself some time to relax and heal too
just for info: I watched this video yesterday and youtube asked me right now, with a little tick box, how I liked youtube suggesting me the video. I ticked positive all points. So youtube maybe will suggest your video to more people. 🤩
You're an amazing person from what I've seen. And capable of alot. I'm not sure if u have a partner or what that situation is. But if you're home taking care of the kids, then that dude needs to be providing.
I hope through parenthood you come to find it's the same in building a relationship with God our creator (Loving your children, wanting the best for them). He spread the real truth of our existence to all of the world. He is VERY REAL. Love stems from God, he died for all our transgressions (Sins; Mistakes; When we hurt others) . Please consider what Jesus Christ of Nazareth has done for you! ; God incarnate (the Son) was with the Father and sent down from heaven to redeem anyone who has faith in him :) Faith also = Trust. He loves you very much John 3:16-17 For god so loved the world he gave his one and ONLY begotten Son, that whosoever believes in him, shall not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send his Son to condemn the world (He's not here to judge ! ; yet) but to SAVE the world through him! John 14:6 Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but through me." Historically sound; he existed and did everything the bible said he did, he was innocent and holy, sent from heaven into a virgin! And he will return VERY soon! And I mean.. very very soon, sooner that you think.. Praying for you :] And hope the best for you
It's taken me forever to unlearn the things I was taught about achievement and rest . Rest is now a priority, for certain... Thankfully I have the option to homeschool my children and go at our pace , not society's.
That’s so wonderful, how have you enjoyed homeschooling thus far? It would be really hard for me to do since my husband needs a silent house to sleep off his grave yard shifts but I’ve definitely thought about the home schooling route. Your kids will appreciate all that time with you
I am a man, and I have the same questions also almost every day, and no clear answers. Very often when I look at myself I cannot believe how much I gave up for others (good others), I just cannot believe it.
I cannot believe it either (for myself) good and bad, but the good seems to prevail. Self sacrifice is ultimately a very devotional thing even when it wasn’t for the best reasons
For me..40 year old male. Researching Anthroposophy and applying to everyday events and thinking about them and about my thoughts themselves leads to a kind of path towards liberation from materiality and the stresses of it. It's all meant to test where we're at and make us aware while pushing us further. Lifetime after lifetime. How much do we believe and how much do we hold on to material as if it's all in our control and it's all we got.
I’m fairly new to your channel, you seem like a nice person. I’m sure it probably doesn’t mean much, but I’m here if you ever need to talk, I know you don’t have much time to yourself, but in case you ever feel like it.
Don’t say that! It does mean a lot thank you for reaching out (sorry a lot of messages to sort thorough) I appreciate your support and I am really relieved to find other souls who get it. Thanks friend :’)
There is a certain amount of money you can make to avoid burnout... if you and your partner channel that workaholic energy into the "right" thing where youll be compensated a prosperous lifestyle then the two of you can or 1 of you can use the money to free up more time and energy. For example paying for a food service, cleaning service, etc. Although finding that right thing can be quite difficult and it can be a long journey to get to that prosperous lifestyle. I've seen it time and time again where running a profitable business gets people out of this rat race burnout lifestyle sooner or later.
totally relate..been off work since mid april for the same reason. slowing down and stepping away from what you can to nurture self is the only remedy. the rat race would like us to believe otherwise, though....it's evil and not to be believed haha...take care of yourself and all the best
It's normal. I always feel burnt out after working a job for a while. But the Universe always provides me with a miraculous synchronistic opportunity to take a break when I truly need it. Pray for space. 🌈☯️🙏🏻💜🙏🏻🌌🌈
I have also experienced this wild thing, honestly it felt like Covid was that for me, I had to quit my job and nurture my growing baby who was soon to come! So amazing when life slows for you :)
It's fantasy fulfillment. They occupy the beautiful artificial bubble that's our collective dreeamworld, where we can safely watch them live out our dreamlives from the comfort of our own homes outside the mess and struggle of our everyday lives.
The fact that you take the time to think, and talk about the traps of seeking success, is the very proof that you already are successful. Active emotional questioning about life day to day is ground in which you plant seeds that will sprout later in riches of wisdom. You have a deeply kind way about you, more beautiful than your beautiful face. It's refreshing to see a young person perceptive enough to look past the shiny objects of the Now culture and who calmly communicates to others what she's thinking about. Thank you for sharing!
@@modifeye6721 thank you thank youuu, getting unfollowed by a lotttt of people each upload I do, so this comment is reassuring that it’s still worth it to say what I need to say, I appreciate it my friend
Ppl are truly lost!! It’s all part of the grand design!!! Ur on the right path!! Quite a few of us out, and a shit ton arent. Those who have the time to divert to their useless nonsense, don’t have any kind of life…! ❤️ ⚡️ 💙
I often find myself thinking, 'Why wasn't I enough to be part of her life?' and feeling like I haven't done enough to become someone she, or anyone, would want. Despite my efforts to improve, those thoughts persist. However, I recognize that I've made significant progress since where I was 1 year and 9 months ago. I appreciate the message in your video, as it helps me reflect on my journey and growth.
So right on. Everything seems so complex and complicated and on one hand it is, but I think when we are on the other side of life, when we pass on, we will see and understand how simple it always truly was. Maybe we just can't see it right now because we are inside of time and space and are so limited. It's hard to be grateful all the time. Why is it so easy to forget? Our capacity to remember our gifts and our blessings is so low because we are just a tiny part of the enormous tapestry of life. We can't see beyond our own little part of it. What must it be like to see the whole beautiful thing all at once and to understand how all the pieces fit together? And how what you were so certain was the worst day of your life actually was necessary to facilitate growth or love or goodness in someone else and how that was worth it. It's hard to be content with not understanding now. But like you said, it is a mystery and mysteries are my favorite kind of movie.( To watch! Not to be in!!) Seriously though, it must come down to love. We've got to pray, forgive and love. Sorry my comments are so long.
