I’m 14 and I’ve nearly fully recovered and I can tell you I wouldn’t trade the ed for a single one of the memories I’ve made, relationships I’ve built with my friends and the things I’ve been able to do ❤ Anyone reading you are beautiful and make this world way better, take care of ur health and the environment! There’s just so many things to do, people to meet also, reach ur inner child’s dreams❤❤:) Recovery is the best choice for everyone, you too 💞
The part where “have u ever seen her eat?” They all say no but she says she eats is exactly me when everyone was saying I “never eat anything” YES I DO JUST IN SECRET CUZ IF I DO EVERY1 JUDGES ME SAYING I CANT HAVE THAT then the purges happen
After losing my dad and grandma i wanted something that i could control so i got a ed. This august i lost my other grandma 4 small animals and my dads dog all in 2 weeks and all i can think abt is not eating again.
Having No dad Is better then having one that treats you like a train station....When he comes into your life he acts like he knows everything about you....He gets your hopes up and then leaves again no contact.... My dad Gave me away(His guardianship) To my grandmother because his girlfriend didn't like me.....he chose a Woman Over me.....When I needed something I went to my grandmother because if I asked him i would get told no or yelled at
I am anorexic and have lost more than 20 pounds. I want to recover but it's just... hard. Last month, i was admitted into hospital due to severe anemia. I was told that i HAVE to eat but everytime i eat i feel the urge to just scream. I just can't handle the guilt that goes does my throat with the food. I have purged 3 times since the last one month and i hate myself about it. I REALLY REALLY want a good relationship with food. Everyone says I've changed a lot and i am not that old girl everyone liked. I really want to recover and become the old happy girl who didn't care about eating more or less food. I want to love myself more and want to be confident in my own skin. I really wish i could love myself...
oh my god, i just GENUINELY hope everything gets better and im sending all my love and wishes 🥹 i hope you get the relationship you want with food, and i hope for your speedy recovery love.... I don't really know what it is like to have ED, but i just TRULY wish that it gets better for whoever struggles w it. i hope you can try your best for fight this. YOU GOT THIS!! (hope im not unintentionally putting you down with any of my words, and im totally not saying its easy, but sending you hope :>)
I was raped and sexually assaulted by my first boyfriend right before we went to homecoming. That was my virginity. Then there were more times, and more times he sexually assaulted me. After I left him, he went to a mental hospital and I texted his mom about what he had done. She blocked me. I was 14/15. Now, I'm almost 16 and my friends still make fun of me for it, and I still think about it. Every. Single. Day. He is a rich boy whose dad was in the navy, and I talked only positively about him. Nobody believes me, except my mom who can't understand that I was RAPED and SEXUALLY ASSAULTED and not called a name or accidentally pushed. He didn't care about me, only himself. He was not armed, so many will say it doesn't count. That first night, he sexually assaulted me and I suggested going for a walk. We walked to the park bathroom and I froze. I froze and I regret it so much because I thought I was just being dramatic. I am not being dramatic. YOU are not being dramatic. Your experiences are VALID and if you're like me and will never see justice, I hope you find the peace you deserve.
I dont want to tell anyone. i dont think they'll believe me, I have no proof, i hate it. i hate my body, hate that he liked my body, worried because i couldn't scream. I hit him once, told him to stop. cried. he lft right after. i just walked home and hid in my room. i hate him. i didn't know him, he had a girlfriend and everyone thought he was perfect i didnt even know his name
Idk the First one but Here the Rest Sarving in suburbia, to the Bone, Sharing the secret, run (Short Film), dying in Plan sight, glee, Dance Academy, Skins, instabile, ginny and georgia, the edge of seventeen, red Band Society, Feed, when frendship kills, empty (Short Film)
they’re right… its kinda like a coping mechanism. it start as a distraction, then a ritual, then some type of numbness. so much so it’s like you think nothing about it but everything about it at the same time. you can’t remember the last time you cared about anything more than the calories you consumed or how youre going to burn them off. it’s a feeling of everything and nothing all at the same time and it’s so damn confusing
Some of those clips reminds me of my teenage years, almost a decade ago and I started to fall in the trap of ed. I wish my life had been different, I fucked up everything
Left with feeling that I have never experienced what joy is . She said it perfectly right. Over the time depression erase the memory of if you ever had a joy
You know sometimes I dont know if it's real. If I am just faking it all. Cuz sometimes I do want to feel it. Why would I want to feel like this? But there are times when i would do absolutely everything to not feel this way but sometimes it's as if i am running toward it. Its so confusing. I really dont understand. Maybe it's better if I think I am faking it. That means I have control over it. And that I'm just stupid. Cuz whenever i start thinking it's real i feel this overwhelming sense of fear that everything's fucked and I'll probably lose myself and they'll see it. I don't ever want to feel that way. Like it's the end and I'm losing everything.
dear, are you okay? i hope everything gets better and someday you can have a healthy relationship with you and your body... :( im sending lots love, all the best for everything, lovely 🥹 you're still young, please give your body all the nutrients and strength it needs. you are NOT a failure. you are good as you are, and you have so much potential in you that your body can help you to achieve!! <3 I don't really know what it is like to have ED, but i just TRULY wish that it gets better for whoever struggles w it. i hope you can try your best for fight this. YOU GOT THIS!! (hope im not unintentionally putting you down with any of my words or triggering by any means, and im totally not saying its easy, but sending you hope :>)
I ate today and wanted to throw it all up I am so big even my cousin says she big but her body is so beautiful but I can never think that mine is I just want to die
[TW] mention of R*pe, SH, ED, Grooming, Abuse(Different forms), ect. The very first time it happened i was 11. It was mid way through 6th grade when my girlfriend at the time who was 14 came onto me. I tried everything to get her off but she wouldnt. The second time was in 7th. Once it happened i started to spiral. I would cut myself, have sex, starve myself, i would do anything to distract myself. 3rd time i was dating a boy 3 years older. I was in grade 8 and 13. I would let him do anything to me because he said he loved me. Along side being abused by him, i was groomed by a man 3 times my age. He said that if we had sex everything would be better. Later that year after that relationship, i got into another one with a guy 6 months older then me. I thought he would be different. 1 week into our relationship i was r*ped. I told a couple friends and they said that it didnt count because i didnt say no. I tried to tell them that i was scared to say no. It went on for 3 months. I was abused sexually, emotionally, mentally and physically. He would find it fun to hit me with rulers because i would cry. And the most recent was in grade 9. He got me pregnant. Imagine being 14 years old and pregnant. I had been pregnant before due to my past and i paniced. I went home and cut myself. I did this for hours. The baby died and i felt happy yet sad. Because of all this the amount of things i cant do is immense. I have developed issues such as: Hypersexuallity Trust issues Depression(Undiagnosed) ADHD(More prominent) Autism(More prominent) Meltdowns Panic Attacks Anxiety Attacks Severe Anxiety Social Anxiety Self Harm tendencies Suicidal Thoughts Eating Disorder(Bulimia Nervosa, undiagnosed) DPD(Dependent Personality Disorder) And so much more. Ive gone through with 7 attempts on my life. And non have worked. I have lost friends because they didnt believe me. I have 2 very close friends, but in picks on me for my SH and ED. And the other also SHs and has an ED and will jusy say same. I apologize for how long this is, i tried to summarize as best as possible. Im doing better. Remember you deserve the world, but the world may not deserve you.❤
The very first time it happened i was 11. It was mid way through 6th grade when my girlfriend at the time who was 14 came onto me. I tried everything to get her off but she wouldnt. The second time was in 7th. Once it happened i started to spiral. I would cut myself, have sex, starve myself, i would do anything to distract myself. 3rd time i was dating a boy 3 years older. I was in grade 8 and 13. I would let him do anything to me because he said he loved me. Later that year after that relationship, i got into another one with a guy 6 months older then me. I thought he would be different. 1 week into our relationship i was r*ped. I told a couple friends and they said that it didnt count because i didnt say no. I tried to tell them that i was scared to say no. It went on for 3 months. I was abused sexually, emotionally, mentally and physically. He would find it fun to hit me with rulers because i would cry. And the most recent was in grade 9. He got me pregnant. Imagine being 14 years old and pregnant. I had been pregnant before due to my past and i paniced. I went home and cut myself. I did this for hours. The baby died and i felt happy yet sad. Because of all this the amount of things i cant do is immense. I have developed issues such as: Hypersexuallity Trust issues Depression(Undiagnosed) ADHD(More prominent) Autism(More prominent) Meltdowns Panic Attacks Anxiety Attacks Severe Anxiety Social Anxiety Self Harm tendencies Suicidal Thoughts Eating Disorder(Bulimia Nervosa, undiagnosed) DPD(Dependent Personality Disorder) And so much more. Ive gone through with 7 attempts on my life. And non have worked. I have lost friends because they didnt believe me. I have 2 very close friends, but in picks on me for my SH and ED. And the other also SHs and has an ED and will jusy say same. I apologize for how long this is, i tried to summarize as best as possible. Im doing better. Remember you deserve the world, but the world may not deserve you.❤
The very first time it happened i was 11. It was mid way through 6th grade when my girlfriend at the time who was 14 came onto me. I tried everything to get her off but she wouldnt. The second time was in 7th. Once it happened i started to spiral. I would cut myself, have sex, starve myself, i would do anything to distract myself. 3rd time i was dating a boy 3 years older. I was in grade 8 and 13. I would let him do anything to me because he said he loved me. Later that year after that relationship, i got into another one with a guy 6 months older then me. I thought he would be different. 1 week into our relationship i was r*ped. I told a couple friends and they said that it didnt count because i didnt say no. I tried to tell them that i was scared to say no. It went on for 3 months. I was abused sexually, emotionally, mentally and physically. He would find it fun to hit me with rulers because i would cry. And the most recent was in grade 9. He got me pregnant. Imagine being 14 years old and pregnant. I had been pregnant before due to my past and i paniced. I went home and cut myself. I did this for hours. The baby died and i felt happy yet sad. Because of all this the amount of things i cant do is immense. I have developed issues such as: Hypersexuallity Trust issues Depression(Undiagnosed) ADHD(More prominent) Autism(More prominent) Meltdowns Panic Attacks Anxiety Attacks Severe Anxiety Social Anxiety Self Harm tendencies Suicidal Thoughts Eating Disorder(Bulimia Nervosa, undiagnosed) DPD(Dependent Personality Disorder) And so much more. Ive gone through with 7 attempts on my life. And non have worked. I have lost friends because they didnt believe me. I have 2 very close friends, but in picks on me for my SH and ED. And the other also SHs and has an ED and will jusy say same. I apologize for how long this is, i tried to summarize as best as possible. Im doing better. Remember you deserve the world, but the world may not deserve you.❤
i recently regained the weight i lost earlier. an uncle told my mom- does your daughter weight 125kgs? i know i am not pretty and thin but i do not weight 125 kgs. i really don't. food has always been a tough topic for me. i work out and eat one meal a day but still i gained weight. i hate myself too and i can do nothing about it.
I can't just not eat cause if i don't my mom would shove it down my throat that's for sure lol i can't blame her tho when i was a kid i made sURE she ate or else i wouldnt eat lol like i know its outta love ma but CHILL IM NOT HUNGRY. and sometimes internally i wanna just not eat anything at all to lose weight... Its the only way i know i can so i don't know wtf to do honestly. I also have a problem that even if im full, if theres still some left i have to force myself to eat it which makes me feel gross.... I dunno.. (but im glad theres finally representation of chubby ppl with an ED. its usually only a bunch of skinny ppl. We need more representation of chubby ppl and men with it tbh)
Not all SA is irl Online sexual abuse is real I'm a living proof of it I was groomed and used for child porn a few months ago In terrified of them finding me People kept harrasing me when they knew what had happened Telling me my life partners were probably using me for nudes(which they have NEVER asked for) I live scared daily thinking "what if" or always feeling guilty or ashamed because "at least it wasn't rape" Many people get away from me after knowing what has happened A classmate found out and the first thing he asked was "did you let him?" I'm not over the legal age of consent yet I always feel numb about it or cover it up with a laugh when talking about it I can't process it Let alone that it was 3 men above the age of 20 and calling me their "toy/doll" like I wasn't a human being with feelings I turned 13 3 months ago It happened a month before my birthday
Police are useless. There is no justice for women in this world. Their system only protects men.This is why we need feminism. Our voice needs to be heard.
The past: when people saying it's ok we don't want that because it's not going to be ok The present: when people don't say that anymore, we want them to say it for reassurance
Kinda feels like your super unproductive but you can’t do enything about it and you can’t sleep especially when your a teen or tween people always say your dramatic or lazy everyone tells you “your fine””you have nothing to be sad about” almost numb like there is nothing left for you this is really real
