I'm Stefanie, a doctoral student in second language acquisition, an English as a second language instructor, and a mother raising two trilingual children in French and Spanish, my non-native languages. I'm passionate about helping others experience the richness of life in two or more languages. I started this channel because I didn't see many channels providing advice for parents raising bilingual children in a non-native language. I post videos with tips and encouragement inspired by both my PhD studies and my experiences as a non-native French speaker living in the United States raising my sons in French.
A second language is a lifelong gift we can give our children, but the journey can be difficult at times--especially for non-native speakers. I hope here you'll find the inspiration and motivation we all need to go beyond simply learning a language to truly LIVING through your language each and every day with your family.
How exciting for you and your son! I’m excited to hear about how much his Spanish grows with this opportunity. Your children are very lucky to have you. You take on this extra weight on your shoulders of their multilingual education on top of all the other things a mother teaches her children. ❤
Thank you so much, Mayra! I know that if none of this works out, they'll still be OK and will do great, but I am definitely relieved :). Hope you're doing well!
Also, I'm not going to lie, when you said that you checked the box, I was disappointed, as it does seem dishonest. I realize you have no negative intentions, but I think it is pretty clear that the intention is that those spots are reserved for heritage language speakers and immigrant families.
Hi Mac! Thank you so much for your comment. I definitely never want to suggest that parents should be dishonest on these sort of things or cheat other eligible children out of a good opportunity. My understanding was that the program is for children who speak Spanish acquired in a naturalistic setting with the ultimate goal being to balance out Spanish speakers with English speakers for classroom interaction. This way, all kids can acquire both languages. I was completely honest when asking the principal at the info session: I explained our situation, the age he began, how we've had an au pair, etc. She told us that he would qualify as a Spanish speaker for the purpose of the lottery. I never would have selected that had I not gotten the OK from the administration and I certainly advise parents to ask their administrators for advice on this.
@@LiveYourLanguage When we think about dual immersion programs, the most important factor is not just to encourage the minority language, but also to limit the majority language. I am copying this from the "dual language programs" part of my school district's website: Who should identify as Spanish-Dominant? Spanish-dominant seats are intended for students for whom Spanish is their primary language. This means that the student understands AND speaks more Spanish than English. Some examples of ways a child could be considered Spanish-dominant are if they communicate with family and community members mostly in Spanish, if they primarily use Spanish when upset or asking for help and if their play language is primarily Spanish.
@@Mac_an_Mheiriceanaigh I love that your school district goes into this level of precision in guiding parents about their children's eligibility. I really like this criteria because it seems to be really clear while also putting the factors that will keep the program sustainable--minority language USE--at the heart in such a way that will give the most opportunity to the children that are at the highest risk and can benefit the most from the program (children with Hispanic heritage who do not speak English yet, especially recent arrivals). Given the chance, I'll advise my district to offer similar guidance somewhere because "Spanish speaker" and even "native Spanish speaker" (which would include my youngest who began learning in a home setting before he could speak and continues to this day) just are not precise enough. This also highlights how multifaceted language can be, including and maybe especially for children of foreign language parenting, which may not fit as nearly into some more common categories of "native speaker," "first language" and "heritage speaker." Thanks for sharing these points!
I'm surprised they told you it "must be the child's first language." I expect that what they were trying to say was it "must be the child's dominant language."
Hi Stefanie, congrats! That being said, now you have to definitely get your son prepared for the test! I live near you, as you probably recall, and so I have heard a lot about the test. If I remember correctly, they have you leave and then a bilingual adult or adults speak with your child. If the child responds only in Spanish they pass, but if they use English at any point, they fail. Is that what you've heard also?
I was confused (Ftm) because I am bilingual my husband too. We both speak fluent English & fluent Spanish. We are both Mexicans&our family are from Mexico. We want our son to speak Spanish too. We been speaking to him in Spanish since birth. He is 1yrs old(18m). & he speaks a few Spanish words he understands Spanish too. But we also want him to speak English too we just don't wanna confuse him 😅. He's primarily language right now is Spanish ❤.
Do you speak only in french with your kids or in English as well? I'm new here and I would like yo speak in 3 different languages with my son but I'm not sure if it'll confuse him. Thank you 🙏🏻
Hello, and thanks for watching! I speak only French with my kids. My husband (and the community we live in) all provide English input and our au pair speaks Spanish to them. We are using the one person one language method. For a time before my oldest started preschool (a Spanish immersion school), I interacted with him in basic Spanish during maybe 1 hour a day to get him acclimated and excited (hopefully!) to Spanish. This was concentrated to mid-afternoon playtimes (time and place method) and some work in a Spanish activity binder during breakfast. You're right to be thinking carefully about how to present each language. Several languages from one person is possible with careful planning (sticking with 30-40% of their waking hours in each language) and some additional strategies to make it clear when they can expect each language. This will help with acquisition. What worked well for us (advice from Adam Beck) was to work hard to establish one language as the language of communication and build on from there. :)
I’ve been looking for a German emotion wheel, but so far have found nothing suitable. I’ve been thinking about doing the same - translating it myself. Thanks for the reminder.
@@joelturnbull4038Great minds! I wonder how Google Lens would perform on this translation task. I should give it a try and report back. Thanks for watching and hope you're doing well!
@@Mac_an_Mheiriceanaigh that's so cool! I love when I can hear about the same topic from several places. Helps to reinforce new info. Thanks for watching!
Thank you for this video! My husband's Latino but his family never taught him Spanish and he struggled with language barrier his own community like many American children of immigrants. I am Korean and speak fluent Korean and plan to raise our child with Korean. But I always wanted to also incorporate Spanish as well so that the child can grow trilingual. And I've been learning Spanish but it's my 4th and worst language. This video energized me. Gratitude to you!
I'm so happy to hear this. The seeds are there for trilingual children! I hear of so many people reclaiming their heritage language the same way I did with French. Heritage is a wonderful motivator for kids but it might not kick in until they're a bit older and get to experience the language need a bit more with relatives. I wouldn't count it out. Maybe your husband will join in the efforts as well and you could learn and expand on Spanish as a family :).
Thank you so much for your videos! I'm currently 6 months pregnant. My child will definitely speak 2 languages, my husband will speak English and my entire family also speaks English. In school they will learn our countries language. I would like to add a third language - Hungarian. I grew up with my mother speaking to me in Hungarian while to my siblings in English. For my mother, it was her mother tongue. For me, it was technically my mother tounge, but I know English and my countries language way better. For me, speaking in Hungarian requires a lot more effort. Your videos are very inspiring. I love it that it's not your native language, and you are still doing it. It's so nice to hear that it's possible!
Teachings kids several languages is definitely possible . I spoke 4 languages as a kid : English ,Talysh(a dialect of Persian) , Turkish and Russian . I still speak all 4 but I also learned Spanish a bit as a teenager and French in the UK as a kid though I am Canadian and I lived in the US it was funny that the place where I learned French was the United Kingdom lol the coolest thing is that because I was raised a polyglot I speak appx . 8 languages but I understand a lot and I mean a loooot more languages. Keep up the great work !! This is simply awesome !! I hope I'll be able to achieve what you have achieved , absolutely astounding !!
What languages did you teach your son? I'm only fluent in English but can get by in several. We dabble in Portuguese, Spanish, Hindi/Urdu, ASL, and several others. I'm learning Italian and speak ok Portuguese, Hindi, and sign. But I'd love for him to speak decent Hindi and Spanish... This video is SOOO encouraging!!!
My first language was Spanish & I speak fluent English & a little German. I want my son to grow up knowing all, but I definitely need help with the German
Have him watch cartoons only in German from age 2. No English allowed. He will *at least* get perfect comprehension, and then learning to speak it later in life will be relatively easy.
Im German. German is really hard and our emotions in German are deep. If you don't know German it's gonna be hard for you. but if you don't want your son to be native, you want him to teach him the basics and the understanding of the language you can start with children shows and song. It's easy to find Disney movies and shows on Disney+ and our children songs are the same in English so it's easier for you to pick it up and to switch. just make sure your pronunciation is good enough bc German words can be tricky to pronounce
@@xunvenile German hasn’t been hard for me at all, lol. I think because I know Spanish. I think if I only knew English I can see why it would be very hard.
Hi Stephanie, thank you so much for this video!! I am French (by the way your French is great and I am very impressed by how well your sons speak French!!). I have been speaking exclusively in English with my now 5 year old daugther since she was born. The first 2 years were great, she would sometimes reply in English to me and said her first words mostly in English. But then, when she was 3, she started school. I live in France, school is in French and no one but me speaks English with her. I feel like she has lost interest in English and doesn't feel the need to speak it. Even though she understands English, she can't speak it at all and that bothers me a lot. My question is, is there a way to get my daugther to reply in English to me (it might be late now that she is 5)?
Sharing this here (my bilingualism book reviews) in case it is interesting to you, Stefanie, or anyone else: For someone who isn't sure if bilingualism is for them, I would recommend either "Be Bilingual" by Annika Bourgogne or "Family Language Learning" by Christine Jernigan. For someone who knows they want to raise their child(ren) bilingually and wants help creating a language plan and specific advice for how to talk about their goals with others (professionals, teachers, family, etc.) I would recommend "Bilingual Families: A Practical Language Planning Guide" by Eowyn Crisfield. For someone who wants to read other parents' stories and get a closer look at what some different bilingual language plans can look like, I would recommend "Bilingual Success Stories Around the World" by Adam Beck. For someone who already has a language plan and needs activity ideas, I would recommend "The Toolbox for Multilingual Families" by Ute Limacher-Riebold. For someone who already has a plan but isn't seeing the results they want and need more specific guidance, I would recommend "Maximize Your Child's Bilingual Ability" by Adam Beck. For anyone who wants more research, or a reference they can recommend to professionals, there is "A Parents' and Teachers' Guide to Bilingualism" by Colin Baker. I also recommend: "Talking with Your Toddler" by Teresa Laikko (★★★★★) "Raising a Bilingual Child" by Barbara Zurer Pearson (★★★★☆) "Becoming a Bilingual Family: Help Your Kids Learn Spanish" by Stephen Marks (★★★★☆) "The Parents' Guide to Raising Multi-Literate Children" by Yoshito Darmon-Shimamori (★★★★☆) "Bringing Up a Bilingual Child" by Rita Rosenback (★★★☆☆) I emphatically DO NOT recommend: "Bilingual Children: A Guide for Parents" by Juergen Meisel (★☆☆☆☆) "Bilingual by Choice" by Virginie Raguenaud (★☆☆☆☆)
Surprised you hadn't already read Jernigan's book! I've read it several times, and given it as a gift to four or five people. I find it's encouraging for people who are not sure, but not a great resource for people who are already committed to the process.
@@CarlsLingoKingdom It's not really my favorite, actually, but what it is good at is making it feel easy, like anyone could do it. Other books I recommend more for strategies or activities, but all of them (perhaps rightfully so) make raising a child in a minority language sound difficult in a way that Jernigan doesn't.
Thank you for sharing these tips and your journey. It’s very encouraging and reassuring because this process of parenting in a non-native language can be very discouraging at times. 😅😊
Thank you for watching and commenting. I completely agree. It always helps to know someone else is out there going through similar experiences. Keep it up!
Thanks for the advice. I also find that reading topical picture books (where available) is helpful, as they tend to use the common vocabulary used in a given context. Update on my situation: we have a second son now - he’s 4 weeks old today. My oldest son is about 3.5 years old (birthday in August), and has a very good passive understanding of German. He has recently become interested in trying to say some German words or singing some simple German songs; he was very resistant for a long time. Last year, he had access to a native speaker once a week for about an hour, who spoke 80% German with him. I was thrilled to find that my son could understand something like 90% of what the native speaker said! That really encouraged me to continue. I have committed to speaking exclusively German with him until he turns 4, and then I’ll review the situation. My biggest challenge seems to be that, because I’m not speaking my native language, not everything comes so spontaneously as it does in English. So, when I would usually make lots of mundane comments, I often just say nothing - e.g., on a road trip. This is something I want to get better at: just doing some small talk.
Joel, its good to hear from you and congratulations on your new son! You are right...picture books go hand in hand with looking things up because they will reveal the right sort of vocabulary to you. Great tip! You're setting up a great foundation for your older son and it's so wonderful that you had the joy of seeing him interact with a native speaker effectively. I love your approach--setting up a checkpoint to reassess whether this lifestyle is working out for you. I think everyone should take that approach. So many people don't ever start because they are afraid they can't sustain it for the child's entire childhood. I'd definitely encourage you to push through those difficult moments of small talk to say something, even if its not exactly what you would have said in English. If it's to difficult at first, I'd encourage you to even say those things in English so there is exposure to some language, even if it's not German. You know already how with experience, these situations will come to you more and more easily :). Thanks for reaching out!
So we do the OPOL method. What are your thoughts on this? Our daughter is learning Japanese and mom is Japanese so speaks to her exclusively in Japanese. I've noticed that our daughter is more attached to her mother, my partner. She outright says she prefers her and only wants her for things like bedtime, going places etc. I do not speak Japanese nor do I understand it. I feel left out of the conversation and feel I am missing out of much of what is going on with our daughter when they speak. It could be at the dinner table, lying in bed, or playing. Is this feeling of exclusion part of the OPOL method? If so how do you overcome it? How do you work to not have the child favor one parent or the other? Thanks!
Thank you for watching the video and for taking the time to leave a comment. I believe what you describe in your comment is one of the dark sides of OPOL: exclusion of the other person if he or she does not understand the target language. My tip is always to prioritize relationships first and foremost. If you feel excluded, talk to your partner about speaking the majority language when you're around or at a certain time of day (from dinner on through bedtime, for example). Remember: OPOL is just a tool to help parents provide adequate levels of input in the language. A rule of thumb is no less than 30-40% of your daughter's input should be in Japanese. Depending on how much time she spends with your partner, you have some wiggle room and if an hour or two in the majority language this will result in your feeling much more included, it's absolutely worth it. OPOL is a means to an end, not the end itself. Translator earbuds: I heard of translator earbuds that translate words around you into English. I got a pair for my husband, but he hasn't tried them yet. They're called Timekettle Language Translator Earbuds. Maybe that might help? Once we try them out I'll make a post about it 🙂. I hope this helps. Stay in touch! I appreciate your perspective.
Great. And one could say also that the children could learn to read and write since they are two year old. You could start with simple words like "mama" in big and red letters.
hi, I just wanna start raising bilingual kids but my oldest child is already 5yo, is it too late? and how to do that? because it would be confusing for her if I suddenly changed my language when speaking to her.
My son is 5 years old. I haven't spoke english to him because I am not a native speaker and I do not live on an english speaking country... can I start or is it too late?
I'm not fluent in my native tongue but started speaking to my baby in it from birth using the OPOL method. The more I soeak the better I get and I have a tutor as well. She's the one who encouraged me not to rely on being fluent to speak and also allow myself to make mistakes. I'm now a solid intermediate and only use English when I'm nonplussed, although I base my tutoring on my daughter's growing needs. Songs and books have been great and I agree about practicing with these.
I went to a Russian Saturday school as a child in the UK (I spoke Russian at home and English at school/with friends), and I enjoyed it for a while but got more stressed out by it as I grew older. I think I went from ages 5-12 or so, it was best for me to stop when I did but in retrospect it was one of the better things for me to be able to talk to so many native speakers outside of my own family! I'd definitely suggest trying again as long as it's not a huge stress on everyone, just from my own personal experience looking back on it. Mental health and wellbeing come first though :)
