I feel so sorry for you, i lost my 17 year old cat at the beginning of the year. And just before Christmas last year i lost one of my 11 year old cats. They die from kidney disease. When i learned about it i switched my other 11 year old cat to wet food, dry food was the main cause and there is no cure for it. I can say now that i finally do not cry when i think about them. It hurt so much, but time helps.
I’m so sorry for your lost it’s always so hard to say good bye to someone or something that means the world to you i just lost my baby goat so I can feel your pain