I admire children who refuse to give up their ability to love after being brought up by a controlling parent. Like then that parent when going through an aging process which is not healthy at all then that parent while seeking compassion and empathy after asking to borrow an adult child's car for a short period of time to be only grinding the gears to cause a total break down of their adult son's car whom they are feeling envious of is something a very controlling and narcissistic parent might do too after bragging about how they can pass a driving test regardless of how many chronic health problems they had at the time...

Easy enough for me to recognize a controlling person now. Like somebody who is modelling self gratification techniques for all in his audience whom he is trying to control or when he is advising the temperature in the room while all others in the room are supposed to be practising their social imitation skills too at the time which is making everybody feel very uneasy at first while feeling faint.. Self gratification techniques which of course could never only at first get flagged as being against the law while it being only innapropriate at the time.

I got PSTD when I was 15. I got it from months of intense bullying at high school. Basically I was getting hunted down most days by bullies 10-20 people all hunting me down to beat me and film me getting bashed and then laugh at it spread it on social media. This happened often people would report my location via. text. I also had to leave the school and hide in bushes and watch people while prone because if I was caught I would be attacked. I was never safe. I walked to school after recess one morning and was attacked from behind. I fought off the attacker successfully but had a bottle thrown at my head and it got me in the temple and concussed me so I had to flee with all them following me. People were even coming past my house. I had a history of truama before this though. Basically since age 15 I have had symptoms of anxiety/fear of fighting, paranoid thoughts of being attacked again, sweating, butterflies in stomach, upset stomach feeling, feeling one edge when people raise there voice or I perceive someone will hurt me. When it is a aggressive situation I find I start to leave my body and feel instense build up of fear/rage within me I also start to shake and my voice goes trembling and soft, I look people dead in the eyes and just paranoid and sometimes I will scream and have explosive rage or maybe if someone attacked me physically I would go into autopilot and defend myself. This illness had held me back alot because it even happens in social situations fear of being attacked. Im 23 now and still haven't been able to beat it fully. It is alot better now though. Theres always hope. God heals. ❤✝️

Made my afternoon even though I’m late❤❤❤

Dear Karuna, Thank you so much for this video. I'm a quadriplegic from England, I've done EMDR before(6yrs ago) for PTSD and the trauma relating to a car accident that I suffered 18yrs ago when I was 17 which caused my quadriplegia. I am currently mid-EMDR for Complex PTSD (after falling off the wagon again with alcohol my psychologist and I unearthed a whole host of deep rooted childhood traumas), but what I wanted to say really is that this video is helping me on a day to day, sometimes hour to hour basis, whilst my brain is trying to process all these memories and situations I've buried away, it is currently firmly entrenched in my current toolkit of coping mechanisms. Also it's not just for able bodied people - it's accessible to everybody. All I can say is thank you so much for this video. Kind regards Tom

thank you my body and soul purified by this all way down

Thank you so very much. I really needed to hear this.

Just listening to this made me cry. Even though now that I'm married my mother still tries to control me/my family. She's rude and harsh to my husband if what my husband does is not up to her standards. I feel like I have low self-esteem. I have a lot of fears. I wonder if I'm capable. I love my mom but what you said about if you just ride with her interests, there's nothing going to be wrong but if you try to deviate just a little, she will take it against you personally. It's just so hard.

She is good.

I’m typing this before watching the entire video. I used to be very social, friendly and happy. Now I want to be left alone. I’m not depressed I just feel like I have wasted so much time in my life and I want to grow but I don’t have the energy to actually interact with people. I’m nice but when people wants to be friends with me I isolate myself. I don’t wanna hang out, respond text messages or be on social media.

This one video is amazing, I resonated with every single word. Tenderness, contemplative, beauty of the heart, isolating, safety, world, connect. It is somehow a conflict inside because if I isolate that is a way to set boundaries and feel safe, yet I wish to love the world, but - take my word - if I completely open, then the love toward anything is too intense, it burns me. The me does not remain.

Minute 5. Standing ovation. What is in spirituality referred to as "negative path" and "non action" is actually much better than progressive spirituality: the non action is a complete openness to what arises with no aim at all at purifying whatsoever. Eric Baret claims "there are no mistakes. Any time you want to correct yourself you make a violence". Another important tool in spirituality should be to put God and the Perfection fo what is, and our being unconditionally loved BEFORE any attempt to change us. "But I must change, I am responsible, victim, and so on...": this is the point. In progressive spirituality one tries always to change something ot to transcend something, you are always "doing", never taking into account the only thing that brings together both the treatment of trauma and spirituality: the perfection and God-driven innocence of what is. The okayness. The essence of it, as it is. The change will follow this non action, and not the other way around. For somebody highly traumatized to embark on a spiritual journey of purification and evolution means not to be even able to get angry because it is not "good". Spirituality is not about good or bad, it is the unconditional. If spirituality becomes a way to ask more and more of yourself, to correct more and more, to never allow anything, to judge more, than it is not serving. What a traumatized needs is the chance for something he never thought possible: to be as he is, not to feel iper responsible, not to have to be perfect, to stop being so terribly demanding. Spirituality should be this rest, this complete not demanding. What comes out of this is such a spaciousness that you can be brought up by what awakened in you. It is not you who makes the job. I'll make a simple example: I am annoyed by someone. Since I learnt to be still in meditation, since I learnt that I should not react, since I learnt that what is outside is inside... then I immediately go like: "OMG, I am annoyed, so let's see... what is wrong? I should not be annoyed, I should be bla bla bla". Spirituality is: "How annoyed I feel". Completely annoyed, allowed, felt, as it is. That is it. Then no furhter action will be required. Spirituality is to ease, not to make more difficult: that is mind.

It is very interesting, these traumatized individuals (like me) lack of a "basis". Yet, I don't feel ashamed because the others manage the "beingness" (pointed out to by Mooji etc) but I feel ashamed of the Beauty of the soul. It is true, one needs to allow all the aspects and raise, I have seen it many times myself. But I have also seen the opposite: we are traumatized because the trauma itself is an open door to be more than individuals, and sometimes the resistance is not to the individual but to the "Higher". Sometimes I have seen that trying to put it all together by myself or with any teacher was simply not possible, whereas when I admit this profound wish for the divine, it is the Higher Power that brings it all together. The idea that we have to be "the full spectrum" is sometimes just egoic. The point is that we fear the Beauty in which, willing or not, we'll be dissolved. One final note: I do agree with you that simply being can be absolutely the wrong choice, when a resistance is prevailng. The treasure is almost always in the resistance itself when felt and gone through in total innocence. There is no feeling at all that cannot be gone through with total innocence. Even shame.

Does it feel like someone has a fist in your solar plexus and it's opening and then closing over and over with a shortness of breath? I've had chest pains before but never anything like this it's not a sharp pain but a discomfortt pain

Oh bless you are such a lovely warm lady but my ADHD is triggering and I can’t understand some of your angles… sorry I am not meaning to be critical it’s just me not being able to take it in.

Hey Karuna, I still have a question regarding your comment on non duality. Can I maybe write you an email?

Because people are morons? simple.

I hate so called 'friends'! When a hug would save me, there isn't one. Mine doesn't come from childhood trauma - I didn't have one! It's the adult arseholes who just don't care x

Im glad i stumbled on this channel ❤

The thing that makes me wanna fucking vomit is the hypocrisy of these parents that judge great parents 🙄

Sorry you went through this i really hate your dad for what he did to you. My parents always hated me and dad tried to kill me but im free of them and im happy and at peace now we didn't deserve any of this ❤love and peace

After I educated myself on psychopaths Now they see me as a lunatic that needs ti be locked up. Lol lol lol lol Really too funny.

Absolutely do not tell a psychopath your real feelings

I had no idea_ read - evan starks book Thanks Doc Stark

Thank you!

I have childhood trauma. I allowed people to disrespect me and blame me for their bad behavior. I did a lot of therapy. I did EMDR and DBT therapy. I am now being truthful and allowing myself to feel my anger from being disrespected. I can now leave hurtful relationships or abusive jobs. I can love and respect myself. I don't have to feel guilty or shameful for taking care of myself. This is where I am. I am in recovery from codependency. I am safe and respect myself.

Love your page. Just found it. Subscribed ! 🎉

I notice my kindness /happiness triggers negative controlling narcassists lol

I notice my kindness /happiness triggers negative controlling narcassists lol

I am 43 and trapped with a controlling parent

It made me smile to hear a dog at the end. 🖤

I love you, thank you :)

I wonder if this woman realizes how important this video is.

(36yo - New Subscriber) Hello Karuna, I've been loving and have been massively positively loving your channel and this video in particular. The validation vibes I am feeling from your content are nothing short of remarkable. I'm in this last resort phase with my last living parent (67yo) who with some research and exploration on my part, all signs point to a covert narcissistic parent so far. That communication piece you touched on in this video called out to me as along with all our other struggles has been a huge block and hurdle for me. I'm a little foggy about what you mean by developing an airline voice. I'm not sure if you have another video that elaborates on this, if they're is o would appreciate a link reply. I feel that I would benefit from your delivery of this. I think a lot of your viewers would also. Keep shining and thriving... ❤

Quite a broad brush that you paint with, leaving little room for parenting a child.

I had to eliminate sadness as a child because it was a weakness that would be weaponized against me!!

Maby cause people mentally raped, abused me all life, never again, noone comes near me who offee NOTHING

I’m glad I found your channel. Beautiful content - thank you for making this a focus of advocacy.

I only felt a little silly doing this but it was worth it as my cramping was alleviated!

I stopped sharing my interests because of fear. Especially if it's something she doesn't understand or agree with

Thank you your message has really touched me. I know nothing about psychology.but somehow I've tried everything you said in my own tin pot way. I've bought a van done it up and been ridiculed and criticized.well funk that shit. I'm off I've nothing but they have each other god bless em. They will tear each other apart get out folks I'm in Czech Republic now talk about really cool people get out

The danger lies in development as it handed down through generations. In terms the "Software " has been honed while the target is often too young to understand the complexity or the source . A common trait is to hide the source as it would make the perpetrator vulnerable to trauma again .

My ex cheated me out of thousands after getting me to sign a sort of pre nuptial that he never properly ratified. He had a legal team look at it and did everything except confirm it the way it was meant to be done. I didn't know this and lost almost £14 000. These people crawl the earth everywhere...

Thank you for this video, I have been gotten myself into this recurring cycle where my mom kept interfere with my individuality which led to me feeling exhausted and anxious. Your insights on this family relationship really helped me to be more on my decision making for myself.

I isolate myself to meditate

Nope , took tons of crap an abuse a kid , not taking any as a adult . People got a problem with my anger , not my problem, just like it wasn't thier problem when they were abusive an mentally an physically , they didn't care then so why should i care now .

This is a beautiful meditation. Thank you so much.

Well, im 22 and she still care what I do in college, which makes things in terms of grades a little bit more complicated. I just want to be left alone. Plus, she takes away both my phones as punishment..so yea

Abusive parents and siblings, then abusive friendships, then abusive boyfriends, one of which abuses me through the legal system, abusive co-workers, abusive church members, abusive therapists, abusive lawyers, abusive neighbors.....it hurts so much that i can't tell myself im safe, because it isn't true in my circumstance. Constant, on-going abusive has landed me in poverty, so everywhere i move there are violent methheads, animal abusers, sexual predators, corrupt police, hearing domestic violence.....how am i supposed to heal, when the trauma is constant, and still continuing to this day? I have done all i can....kicked out all abusers, live by myself, work for myself, no more marijuana, alcohol NOR sex.....but i have metheads cooking to the front and back of me (literally), and i can't afford to move. I tried moving once before from a methead neighborhood, only to move right into another one? Doesn't do any good to move, because im low income, and there's meth, violence, abuse EVERYWHERE I GO! No, dear, i am not safe now, and it doesn't look like i ever will be....and i never have been. So.....how does someone like me recover? Perhaps we don't, but i am truely happy for those who actually ARE able to get to a safe place, and actually BE safe.

My father is a camillion, double standard control freak he's one sided only he has no accountiblity or take responsibility I have to walk on eggshells around him and feel worthless and like I'm not good enough. My sister is one of his flying monkeys she and him both call me paranoid, crazy, tell me I'm too sensitive, I'm just imagining things. I end up yelling at her because she pisses me for using crazy making on me.