I don't even need to hide what I do to myself, I don't exist. Mid conversation, fully facing the manager, fully visible. They didnt even flinch. The torment doesnt end. Not for the damned. Not for the black sheep. Sacrifice cant be postponed and dodged forever. I guess injuries are common at work. There are an infinitude of excuses and rationals on how everything is the way it should be. There is no escape, no sympathy, no compassion within those of flesh and three dimensions. I dont even know if people are capable of crocodile tears anymore. I know family is. I really want to start casually doing it while having down time and clocked in. As long as im not hurting a person, no one should defend themselves at me. Being a black sheep sucks balls what am I even talking about. How did, i have in details in my diary how things got to this point. They started here practically, just had the safety of feeling nothing and processing nothing.
"BASIL should be here, in this room. Maybe its about time i tell them the truth... even if they hate me. It's time to take this weight off of us BASIL..."
it comforts me a bit, after my former best friend cut ties with me i still think about her everyday and all the time i am alone this captures the feeling of ''what there is left'' i have when walking home by those empty streets while thinking about everything, and all the times i zone out during late night / dawn with nothing to do except sit here and sometimes look back at her profile, having isolated myself from the rest of my friends and spending most of my time doing what comforts me like taking pictures of flowers or drawing i love all of the ''a home for flowers'' themes and they resonate with me personally and peacefully, this one is like IT understands though, this one is more bittersweet. it's lonely, quiet, full of feelings of regret and lost, stagnant, melancholic, but gentle, pretty and comforting, it's like how stuff just goes on despite everything
Оказывается что кума умер 20 лет назад и бабушка которая звала куму к сожалению приняла успокоительное и вообразила то время когда кума был рядом и теперь она принимает тяжелые вещества чтоб забыть об этом..
Floating, clouds pass, weightless. Fields of flowers, trees, flickers of fading dreams. Clear is moon and here we are, together we can live forever into night sky, stay here we will end in this dream.
Headspace Basil is so adorable and sweet, how could one hate him? There's nothing hateable about that face, I just wanna squish it and stretch it like people do in cartoons I wanna hug him so bad, he deserves it
