It's a good video and I get what you're trying to say but sometimes it gets really lonely because I often feel neglected. I don't want to waste your time but if you want to know about me, read the following paragraphs. (It'll be long) So, Let me explain.. I'm an 19 years old and yes, I'm a Burmese citizen. When I was younger, I never liked attention, I never go out to play with kids my age. I'm not one of those kids you'll see on the street playing soccer, even though I'm a boy and that's what society wants you to do. I'm an introvert and I like to be left alone. My parents were great and honest people. So, I turned out to be simple and nice. Well, Too nice for my own good. Other kids tend to takes advantage of me sometimes but I was too honest to notice that. My parents income was not too great but at least they're honest and we're not that poor or anything. We own a barber shop or Beauty saloon and still do. It's the best in your little town. Anyway, since I was little, I had this fascination with western media. Used to watch Channels like Cartoon Network or Nickelodeon.. (You get the point) I remember that I used to be obsessed with Ben 10. The point is.. I'm was a different kid. I don't feel like I fit in with the cool kids but I had a few friends. I think it was at grade 7, they(those few friends) all moved to different cities or school and I was left alone. I had no friends and I started meeting new people but no one felt like genuine friends ever since then. I'll skip to grade 10. It was during Covid. So, the school close and open and close again and again for several times. My memories are a blur. I don't remember anything exactly but I remember the military take over and all those stuffs. Let's skip a little bit further. The year was 2022 and I was still in 10th grade. They said the school will only be open for 2 months and university entry exams will come after that. The COVID was still not gone yet and the country was unstable. So, I didn't want to go. But My parents pushed me. They wanted me to pass and be done with it. I didn't took it seriously since there's only a few of us who came to school during that period. For the first month, I didn't gave a sh*t. I didn't study or do anything. But 2nd month, I didn't want to disappoint my parents, so, I tried so hard during that one month and took the exam. I didn't thought I would pass but I did. I didn't aim for any degrees except English. Not to toot my own horn but I'm a Beast in English. You might think I took a lot of English grammar classes or other things like that. I didn't. I took a few during 4th grade and 7th but they were never useful. It's the same old stuffs I already know from shows and movies. The point is, I didn't got the degree in English and I was really surprised and disappointed. After a few months, I went to the university. Didn't got into the major I wanted. Learned to talk to people and since that was the first time I've been separated from home. It's about 3 hours drive from my hometown to the Uni. Finished the first year. It was rough. I never really fit in with other boys since my interest is in Western media and no one really understand it. They were all about girls... Or.. Other.. Illegal stuffs. (Like, smoking weed) I never were one of them. Oh, I haven't mentioned this but.. I haven't dated a girl in my entire life. I'm not even joking. I wasn't interested in those stuffs. (I'm a good boi🙂). But it felt sooooooo frustrating since everyone was in a relationship with someone back at university. All of my "friends" has someone. It made me feel sad. I feel like I'm broken and I can't fix it because that's just who I am for 18 years. I never went back for 2nd year due to civil war and everything. Currently, I'm just still living in my parents house, no jobs because at where I live, it's hard to find them. I feel bad..i feel like a burden. I'm still socially awkward and still has no one I can genuinely feel connected to. But I knew one thing and that is that I can't keep living in this country because its so unfair and I might go crazy. So, a few months back, I got into contact with my old teacher. She's my 8th grade teacher's daughter and she has studied in Japan. Heard she has been doing a Japanese class for a few years now. So, I decided to attend it. Now, my main goal is to get to Japan and study there. I passed the N5 level exam. Passed the interview for A school at Nagoya.(I was proud of myself for that because I never were once interested in Japanese Culture. So, I had a hard time connecting. But Still, I feel lonely. No one ever send me a massage or talk to me. I met my old friend from grade 8 at the class. He has the same goal too. But we don't really.. Connect. He's an anime dweeb.( That's a harsh word but it's true. Good for him since that's were he's going)What I'm saying is, He already has other friends that he prioritizes. I'm still always the 2nd choice. I have to talk to them first in order for me to get their attention. Not once they tried to communicate with me or check in on me. They didn't need to put in a lot of effort just say "hey" or something like that. They will do it if they actually care about me. I try to ignore and be myself but it gets lonely from time to time. I'll stop here since it's been a long comment. Sorry. I had it let my thoughts out. If you reach the end, thanks. It means a lot to me that you put in effort for my whining.
Thank you so much Tr.❤ I get motivation by watching your vedios.🥰Now I'm friendless so I feel lonely but everything is good with me right now because of you.❤️
