I think they explained that she dressed as a boy bc as the heiress of her clan, it was dangerous for her to be far for her clan and at that early age. Also, Tang San was indeed rough with Yuhao, but Yuhao was also a little of a scumbag, he lacked respect for his relationship with Wutong, so it I don't feel thaaat bad for the trials he went, since they also made him more powerful and got him to be the person he is now.
King of failures and beatings ? I Don't think so, in fact he is quite pitiful being tested without even knowing and having to endure pain and hardships.
Believe it is that her 700k years spirit is too strong to be held in a single soul ring, so it is converted into 4 soul rings with 200k years for each of the rings on average.