bobby, it is time to go the gilbert route. find a nice low expectation partner, get married, have some kids, then start going all out no holds bar dirty comedy until you retire or kick the bucket from bad health habits.
Bobby Lee listen to me dude, I was literally just at the point when I was gonna get into the skateboarding industry and get sponsored, like this happened when I had beat the owner of our local skate shop in a game of skate and he was really good he had several video parts that were all on point and he then said what we’re gonna do is play a game of skate on all the obstacles at this skatepark and if you beat me then we can talk about your future in skateboarding. So I got 4 letters on him back to back bc I found out he was afraid of handrails and hubbas bc he literally saw me grow up in our local skatepark then he gets some letters on me from doing a few tricks in the mini ramp which wasn’t a mini ramp bc it was a 9 foot tall ramp with 2 feet of vert it was scary lol but then it’s my turn again and I frontside flipped the bank and I was smiling ear to ear and he said did you land it and I said yea wtf you weren’t looking and he said no and I turned to the other dudes in the park and was like yo who saw me do the frontside flip and there was only 5 or 6 people there but none of them spoke up and I was like wtf so he know he was gonna lose so then he said well just do it again and if you get close I’ll believe you did it so I said okay fine and I did it and tore my acl bc I landed str8 legged and at the time I was in denial but I looked at him and I was like I’m fine I’m fine and he looked devastated and I said what and he said dude you tore your acl I’ve seen it before and I should’ve just accepted you at your word and lost like a man and he said I’m sorry dude I really am and in that moment he seemed sure that was the end of my career I hadn’t even started but to me it didn’t matter what I was gonna come back and I did and I got way better than I was before to the point where dudes were just getting clips of me and putting them in their skate videos and all I was trying to do was go to the park but then I broke my spine on senior prom night and pushed all my vertebra from L2 down to S1 and crushed all the discs and messed up my sciatic nerve and guess what I still went to prom and danced and went to an after party and all that right and then I came back from that 3 years later better than ever and was better than everyone on the local shops team except one guy Gilbert Crocket. And then I shattered my knee and broke my collarbone simultaneously. Anyways, I’m telling you all of this and the point of this story was after I broke my spine that bad and all that they prescribed me fentanyl patches when I was 18 as well as 150 10 mg Vicodin or hydrocondones is the generic but I got super addicted to opiates and actually ended up doing drugs IV for 6 years and now I’ve been off of them for 8 and I saw your episode where you’re on Joe Rogans podcast and I was like man this guy has like the same character traits as I did when I was in my addiction and like my whole life before that for very similar reasons as far as violence and trauma as a kid but it wasn’t my dad or mom it was someone else in my family but that’s besides the point, the point is that I couldn’t have quality of life bc I was so petrified and paralyzed by fear, fear of judgment fear of like most things having to do with social situations but then one day while I was doing recovery work and this guy sitting next to me and my sponsor in Panera doing recovery work was just staring at me and it made me not want to be there and I was like freaking out for some reason and I just got up and ran out and I waited at my sponsors car and my sponsor came out and that dude was coming out right after him with his girlfriend and she said loudly to him don’t say a word to anyone ever who’s trying to better there life especially not if all you do is jerk off and play video games and get supported from me and when she said that I was watching and it was almost as if I had been having this theory working in the back of my head my whole life and the final piece clicked into place and I realized, as soon as his girlfriend started saying stuff and she said enough where he knew what she was gonna say and he got so red and then angry and I realized in that moment omg I’m such an idiot I’ve been caring what other people think this whole time even though they’re just people too and they have just as many problems as anyone who’s human and they just learned the survival mechanisms that I had used during school but they carried it through life. Which is to act like nothing bothers you no matter what it is and no matter who’s saying what as long as you just stare at them into their eyes and regardless of what they say you just say that’s cool. I like how we’re pretending right now that you don’t have just as many fears as anyone else and the reason you feel the need to pick on people, especially when there’s an audience, I’m glad to understand that you’re just pointing out other people defects to take the attention off of your glaring ass ones and you gotta say it in a way where you have to appear to be the most relaxed person in the room and what I found is that no matter the situation it actually just makes everyone there stop being blind to their defects and it makes them realize how childish and obviously scared that they are while they’re attacking you and the funny and awesome thing is when I did that from that day forward where I realized that everyone is just as vulnerable as I am and that they’re only attacking bc I’m getting attention from the group of people and so that makes them feel threatened and unwanted and makes them start picking out every defect you have and their trying to embarrass you but the fantastic thing is when you own them and say so what everyone’s got things they don’t like about themselves and that they’re afraid of but at least I’m still me and I don’t have to be a fake dumbass who has to act all the time just to make friends and probably goes home at night realizes that everyone who thinks they like you isn’t even experiencing the real you they’re just friends with who you’re pretending to be so you have no real friends. Bobby, Joe Rogan like one of the biggest and most respected podcasters without hesitation stayed over and over how much he loved you and how much he always has and how he treated you with the utmost respect that any person can treat you with and he’s obviously your real friend. He told you the truth as he sees it without worrying about your feelings bc that’s what a real friend does they don’t baby you or enable you, a real friend just tells you like it is so that your picture of reality in your head matches reality in the world. I mean dude he had every chance in the world where he could’ve played the cool guy and just made fun of you and didn’t let you come up with any of the topics like all in trying to tell you is please just realize that all of the bullshit fear that tries to keep you where you’re at and undermines each one of your interactions and makes you feel like you’re just this inferior human being bc of all of the shit you made it through as a Kidd and as an adult and still you’re the fuckin man and you’re still respected and beloved by the one of the biggest podcasts in the world, you can be you my guy bc it’s apparent to me that everyone who knows the real you seems to wanna still be around you and hopes you know that you’re the man and how can you worry about all these irrational fears when the facts in reality don’t support the reality inside your head. Idk if anyone’s told you this stuff before but I am.
Bobby Lee is an elitist Piñata. Could you imagine that, how big of losers the elite are that they need to bully and patronize other people for their own enjoyment.
Holy shit, 11 years later and this is still funny, but so on point and relevant today. Republicans just unironically want you dead or enslaved, and the democrats' best defense against outright fascism is a fucking corpse. Good luck...?
