“We make $27,500/month…Why am I stressed about money?” 

It sounds like since Em is the money getter, she wants her partner to handle the money and leave her alone. I wonder what will happen when Keit eventually makes more money than her in her small business? Once the power dynamics change, she will not have the power to defer managing money to her partner anymore.

For me it is kinda the opposite. More money equals the ability to make many more mistakes and still be ok. I feel this couple makes many but with such large earnings it is not a problem

Loss aversion kicks in. If you've never had apple watches and $100 dinners, it's no big deal to exclude those from the budget, but if you're giving up what you had, it's emotionally different although objectively looks easy to just cut a few luxuries.

I love hearing this. Congratulations to you and your wife.

@@ramitsethi 🙏

Yes yes yes

Or “dude, RUN” 😂

Ivf in the usa is insane expensive

@@Dan16673 it truly is. I have a buddy that went through it about a decade ago and even with insurance covering portions of it they spent 6-figures in the end.

There's another merch idea: IWTYTBR popcorn flavors, perfect for troll-roasting-snackage

I had a coworker go to Mexico for IVF, they have a beautiful baby boy and spent 5-7k

Abroad is the way to go

​@@donyetta83 what a blessing! great to know about MX too, there are incredible IVF practices outside the US..

Yes, definitely agree or even purchasing medications abroad. We purchased from an IVF pharmacy in England and saved thousands each cycle! 4th was a success.

Fantastic share! Thanks for that info about IVF abroad. The steep price probably causes a lot of delays and heartache for an already difficult and emotional journey to attempt parenthood. What a great thing to know and share!

Yeah, I want to watch this one but just can't.

Hmmm this was the case for me yesterday but when I resumed it today it is synced!

Your not alone lol

I was wondering if anyone else had the same problem since no one was talking about it! I’m just listening at this point

I went into those stores recently, and how depressing! Not even the clothes; just how sparse they are because everyone shops online or at more trendy stores.

Macy's now has a department called "backstage" and it's basically a small Ross in there.

LOL. So true

Comment of the day!!!

That’s what we do. We’ve built the vision together, and then I give him periodic net-worth summaries as we review that vision especially at life decision points. I do also check in before major changes in investing or giving or when I see interesting changes in markets, rates etc. He knows where everything is and how to access it so there isn’t any ignorance, and he could take it over tomorrow. It’s just part of my job in the family to be the one consistently paying attention to the details of what we do with what he brings home. It’s worked for us for over 20 years so far.

As much as it sounds like they need to focus on budgeting, in the same way you need to focus on income. 2 sides of the same coin.

Why do you feel like they take it for granted? They seem to feel like they deserve it, which is true. M. is a VP in an IT company, thats a great job that does not fall into a woman's lap for sure and I bet she works way more than the standard 9 to 5 to earn her income.

@@lucaspm98they are not two sides of the same coin. They are completely different coins.

I also didn’t see that they were outspending their income. They’re saving and investing pretty aggressively. And I don’t know how you make it on $600 a month for groceries if you’re only eating out twice a month.

They are making a lot of money but their net worth is relatively low compared to their income. So either this income level is fairly recent or they have been spending too much. With their income level there’s really no reason the HELOC isn’t paid off, and no reason to pay for the marriage by credit card. I feel there’s something not right about their spending habit (“all this I deserve it” reasoning). I make less than them but my net worth is several times higher. And given their young age, they have a lot of potential for more income growth, but their spending habit (borrowing to afford it) may be getting ahead and hold them back. $250 dinners several times a week seem extravagant when there’s still so much outstanding debt, and they could have gone for $100 dinners instead or do more home cooking (it’s healthier too). Given Em’s VP position, it’s likely that she may be stressed at work, and just going out for expensive dinners and not caring about the spending is her way of not adding more stress. But her aversion to be open and up to date with finances seem to be the biggest obstacle in their relationship. They have the income to live a more than comfortable life, but they need to learn to budget and spend with money that they already have instead of thinking they will get more money in the future and so are entitled to spend future money now. Ramit’s reasoning did not look at the debt ask risk. Their highly unequal income with significant debt and insufficient liquid savings is a cause for concern. What if Em cannot work for some time? How would they sustain their lifestyle?

There's some good stuff in there though. All of it will never apply to you or one person in particular, but you might find a gem one day and knowing that Ramit uses it may give you at least a certain level of confidence that yo could start your research there.

They did not go into details but maybe her family have their backs since she comes from money and her dad seems to be rich.

Uh, I thought she was talking about equity as in being underpaid relative to men, not stocks vs. cash.

See here is the thing, middle class people just compare to upper middle class or small time rich people. But once you make up to be somewhat rich, then the ones you compare to are just extremely high, which makes this whole thing much worse.

Comparing to others is great, especially since most people are broke af, I see someone driving a nice car I feel better about my 20 year old car knowing I don’t have a 1,200/ month old car payment and cheap insurance.

😂

it is never too early or late to start retirement planning, there are advisors out there that can help you build a personalized plan

IDIOTIC even if u make 500k

For sure they do not need to procreate. Adopt a baby who needs food shelter A HOME

They paid that 50k off in a couple of years. They are on the road to 5.7M conservatively by the time they retire. While I wouldn't advise putting a wedding on credit cards, they seem responsible with their finances and don't really live above their means (well, M needs to be more involved, but as a household, they're doing fine). If they didn't change anything in their finances today, they'd be just fine. In fact, Ramit is encouraging them to spend more. In my view, long as they have the base covered, mistakes here and there are acceptable long as they learn from it and don't repeat it.

​@@Joce123 why do you think it's their job to adopt? Would you give the same advice to a heterosexual couple who wanted to have their own child? That's just a weird stance...

if you were listening, instead of focusing on how to criticize, you would have heard that they have $50k saved for IVF and they don’t have CC debt anymore

@@makayla4292 I missed the part where they paid it off. I'm glad to hear that. I'm not just focusing on criticizing. It is absolutely stupid, under any and all circumstances, to put a 50k wedding on a credit card. It's absurd and likely cost them thousands of dollars in interest. It was a very, very dumb financial decision. I'm glad it is apparently paid off now so the stupidity could end.

They have to do a back door Roth; and even then, 6k is peanuts at that income level.

Yes, that happens often with yt videos, usually because of the statistics. I liked it better when the income was a surprise.

Yup, they did change it

Yeah I had to come back to it and I thought they removed it for a sec

Glad to know. I am starting to get older, so was a little worried that I was seeing things.

If that were really true they wouldn’t have used a credit card for it lol

Thought the same thing!

With that earning they might live in a HCOL area like SF or Seattle, where a house is like a million bucks and more. Suddenly their money might not be worth that much anymore.

I was going to say. We put about $10k on our CC for the wedding but paid it off immediately. We already had the cost in mind.

@@harveylin3548they said they live in Boston. Idk if that’s high col area. From an Irish perspective their money is nuts but then col here is way lower eg. no student debt or massive healthcare insurance costs. Housing is probably comparable though.

look at what they spend. IVF, Wedding, Business losing money, etc.....

@@ST-rj8iu They can spend the money however they want, I'm not judging them on that. I spend my money in things that we want and also in dumb stuff. It's the lack of satisfaction with her current salary when she is in the top 2% of earners in the US, let alone the top 0.4% of women. I'm also not saying not to be ambitious but there has to be a balance.

@@mastering-digital She is not making the same as men in her industry. That is why she is not happy. If you gender made you automatically make less than your male peers, you would be mad too!

Thats low as a marketing vp?

@@Dan16673 that's not low, that's my point.

Nope, Steve Jobs the original Lizzy stole it from him. I love the IT crew still sticks to it despite the bad rep Lizzy gave it. I love black shirts ❤

Looks like Nate is a black turtleneck connoisseur himself

@@TonyCox1351 😂

If you have such stressful job as a VP (vice president) and have to make hundreds decisions daily about millions of dollaes, you would not bother about couple hundred bucks and are likely exhausted af at the end of the day.

@@angelikalaser7778 she said she was a vice president, not the vice president. She said she took out a $50,000 HELOC at 18% interest so it’s more than a few hundred dollars. Additionally, even if she has five accounts how does she not know which one HELOC is in ?

As far as the HELOC itself, it would be listed on a credit report, so very simple to find out. I questioned if Kate really wanted to know checking account where HELOC loan payment came out of? That would be a monthly payment, so understandable why Kate needed that information. Em's answer really sounded like she was stonewalling, what's the motive behind that behavior? Really would have liked a breakdown of assets between those two. $141K in investments & $54K in savings isn't very much considering their ages and Em's high income. Wondering if Em is hiding assets from Kate.

just google that and pull it up as there are many

They certainly look like they've spared no expense on their lifestyle.

That’s probably their home.

Correct, it's their home. And they make more than enough to cover the monthly costs, and their fixed costs is around 50%. Also, the house is worth 1M+, so even with hidden costs, the asset is still net positive. That's probably why Ramit was not worried about it.

I thought there was a HELOC loan with 17-18% interest?

Thank god they have you out here, policing how they express themselves!

@@mmarieritter216 it’s not “policing” it’s genuine advice to reach productive money conversations that they were struggling to have

​@@mmarieritter216 Haha! Plus... Acknowledging that you're sharing an opinion ("I think") rather than a fact, that's an important step to respectful, honest conversation. They are attempting big, bold, ambitious goals together. Why would they settle for anything less than precision when talking with each other? I feel like they prioritized understanding each other, not just making noise.

😂. My thoughts too!

I was confused with that too. The only way that can happen is if they file taxes separately. Or perhaps their net is below the threshold amount because Em put a lot in retirement?

⁠@@politepupsacademy2890​​⁠​⁠I think it’s based on gross income but good thought on the filing status..if separate she should be able to contribute something since she pays herself so little. Thanks for the reply!

There's a thing called a "backdoor roth ira" that basically makes the income limit not a factor when contributing to a Roth IRA every year. There are plenty of guides online about it. Google is your friend on this one.

​@@YahatetoseeithappenIt's based on income after pre-tax contributions, not gross income

@@vulpixelful Oh really? Interesting ok thanks!

I think because people grade their wealth on a curve . For most people making 200k is rich . People making 200k they compare themselves to people making 500k a year , and up the comparison ladder you go …

Because there's always a bigger fish.

@Disciple736 for sure! But you can be Comparative and also acknowledge you're upper class. 80th percentile income in the US is 149k, and she makes well over double that. Rich people just seem so embarrassed to admit they are rich, as if they are going to offend Ramit... she can't possibly believe that, as a tech VP, that she isn't an upperclass income earner

Rich means you can live off the returns from your investment portfolio till the day you die without making any sacrifices when it comes to quality of life. Making 300k/year doesn’t make you rich, I make a good amount more and I don’t consider myself rich because if I was to quit my job today I would only be able to sustain my current lifestyle for 6 years. This couple is in a similar boat as me and would go broke in 5-7 years if they quit their jobs… not even close to being “rich”.

@macsc5497 class breakdowns are just percentage based though. You may not feel rich, but you are rich. It doesn't mean you are able to quit your job this second? They are young lol

They probably use form 8606 to do "backdoor" Roth IRAs

They could be doing a Solo 401k too.

There's lots of variety in the guests! Here and on the Netflix show. One of the things I like about Ramit's content

That’s kind of Ramit’s shtick and I think it works for him. I watch Caleb Hammer for poor people

Lots of his guests have regular incomes but are actually flat broke.

Yeah, I think I’m more into Caleb Hammer personally. I really like Ramit’s approach to helping people and love the diversity of couples he helps but it’s difficult for me to watch people with 500,000 - 1,000,000 net worth complain. I know in my head that everyone needs help but I think average income people need more help. Just my hang up.

@@aprilstiek7430 I’m the complete opposite, I find Caleb’s guests more “entertaining” but completely unrelatable. Damn are they entertaining though!

On RU-vid? Shocking!! 😂

report them as spam and move on

Yes, it is 😊 I like that it's inclusive of us bi people who can be in a relationship that can look "straight" but we're not 😂

It is for a lot of people! Queer is being reclaimed as a defacto umbrella term, but some folks prefer LGBT+ if they aren't a fan.

@@vulpixelful thank you!

@@andreamckenzie8598 thank you. I tried looking it up online and people just wanna talk about the history of the word. I wish people would talk more about this more because we outside of that world don’t know and it’s confusing for us