I’m 11 or I just turned 11 I know what your probably thinking “why is an 11 year old girl commenting” but hear me out, when I was 2-3 me and my mother moved to my stepdad’s place, and let’s just say that a lot of bad stuff happened to me and my mother but mostly me because my mother only got yelled at, but on the other hand I got physically mentally and verbally abused by my stepfather to remind you I was 2-3 really young, when I turned 4 I decided that there is no point in living and I stoped trusting everyone including my own mother I even stoped trusting in myself when I was 4 I started school but it wasn’t good either I got bullied and hit in school, when I was 5 I was in first grade and I had a friend named aria and she wasn’t nice she was really bad I shouldn’t even call her a “friend” she would call me names and stuff but she wasn’t as “bad” as the other ones some kids would pour water on me put gum in my hair and push me down the stairs in school and my “friend” aria punched me in the stomach but she didn’t get in trouble I did for no reason and my teachers weren’t good either the only one that was kind was my first grade teacher, a few months in the year I got skipped a grade so I was 4 in second grade and my 2nd grade teacher might have “seemed nice” but she wasn’t, one time when I fell asleep in class due to insomnia so I didn’t sleep that night so when I fell asleep my teacher poured an entire bucket of cold water with ice, and it was just horrible,I thought that my second grade teacher was nice even after that and she was the only one I trusted, a few months later my mother went to Dr with my step dad and they left me with my second grade teacher because my stepdad and my teacher were really close she was his aunt, but when I was with them on the first night we were watching either ice age or finding Nemo, and she gave me a snack but I’m pretty sure that she drugged me because when I fell “asleep” 20 minutes later I wasn’t really “asleep” because for some reason my eyes started to close even tho I wasn’t sleepy and I couldn’t move my body I was aware of my surroundings and I could hear things and feel thing just like If I was awake and after 7 minutes or 10 minutes I felt something “down there” keep in mind I was sleeping on the same bed as my second grade teacher and she is a girl and that “something” that I felt “down there” felt like a tongue you know that weird sensation of your tongue when you touch the roof of your mouth right? Well that how it felt “down there” and I felt that something was touching me so of course 5 year old me was scared so I tried to move and get away but my body didn’t move so I’m sure that she drugged me or put something in my “snack” and since I was 5 and scared I didn’t tell anyone about my stepfather abusing me or what happened with my teacher and when I gout the courage to tell my mom about my stepdad abusing me and hitting me with wood and him locking me in my room she didn’t believe me until I showed her the piece of wood and when I did she still didn’t believe me so this went on and on without anyone doing anything to help me and I became suicidal at 5 and I wanted to die so one night I went to the kitchen and grabbed a knife and I pointed it to my throat and I almost killed myself but instead of going through with it I just started to cut myself instead and I stoped after a month, honestly there were only 2-4 people that I could trust and the one that I trusted the most was one of my moms friends his name is Steve or that’s what everyone called him including me he was the one that I wanted to live for he was nice to me he didn’t hit or do anything he was like an angel in my eyes and he still is, my mother used to work at a bar and I used to always come to work with her she would make me dance and do the split in front of everyone but I thought it was cool because I loved dancing and I thought that it was okay but it wasn’t, my mother got pregnant with my sister and yes she is my blood sister because my mother cheated on my stepdad with my real dad but my mother left my real dad again and when she gave birth to my sister I was 6 I turned 6 at least and my sister and Steve were the only ones that I loved with my heart and soul my sister was kind and nice and she always comforted me when I was sad and I had step siblings and they were also horrible they would call me names and spread rumors about me they were 10-16 why were 10-16 year old spreading rumors about a 6 year old I don’t know but there was only 1-3 out of all the 10 of them that were actually nice to me, I’ve gotten sick multiple times and once I got so sick that I vomited and cried in pain because my head hurt a lot and stuff and I wasn’t eating well so my mother told my stepfather to take me to the hospital and they did but I stayed there for at least 4-5 days and one time I found out I was allergic to peanut butter but my stepfather didn’t believe me and gave me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich before school I had to walk to school which was 2-4 miles away but I usually went to one of my stepfather’s friends and his friend would take me as his kids to school so on my way I would throw the sandwich away and I would go to school hungry and in my school there was only reaces there was no lunch so I didn’t eat until dinner and to get home I had to take the buss and one Time when I got home my mother wasn’t there no one was home only a cleaner and the cleaner told me that my mom was at a friends house I had walk 3-8 miles to get there and when I got there my mother was laying on the couch in her friends house and her friend had a kid and that kid “seemed” nice at first but he wasn’t he would pinch kick or slap me so I pinched him back but only I got in trouble and I moved with my grandparents in New York but I had a lot of trauma so my grandpa I call him pa/dad and my grandma I called her ma/mom and they took me to therapy but it didn’t work took me a year to trust them and they verbally and mentally hurt me but I love them because they are kind to me and they love me but to this day I’m depressed dead inside and I have anxiety, but thanks to my grandparents I’m a bit better but the same time worse because I miss my sister and I miss Steve I lost contact with my mother and sister and Steve also keep in mind my real/biological mother is also horrible. So to all the 11 year olds like me that are going through it hang on you’ll find someone who appreciates you soon not just the ones that are 11 like me but everyone❤❤hang in there you’ll find someone who loves you one day❤❤❤ Thanks for reading this have a wonderful day or night❤❤❤❤❤god bless you❤❤❤
I'm so sorry to hear all the things that you went through, my condolences and best wishes goes tu you sis, i hope you finally get happy and peaceful times 🙌❤
I understand you went through pain, but you must not look at your pain in disgust, but instead look at your pain as strength, forget what you think you are and believe only in how far you have come. Sexual abuse may make you think that you are inferior, but that isn’t the case because most people couldn’t live through what you went through to tell the tale you speak today.
Edit music not f&cking attitude I don't want this song to be used while there are 12 fps tigers jumping over the screen while some rando stops a train with his bare hands with bad xgi
