📓 editing YOUR stories! // open workshop // edit with me 

I can almost cry. This was the nicest and most constructive piece of critique i have ever received from someone. See, i always sent my stories to the two people i ever talk to consistently (I don't speak to them anymore), getting feedback from them felt vastly different. I didn't trust their words because i just felt that because they know me and is close to me, it might affect how they react. Getting it from someone who doesn't know me is so much more enlightening. I am the one who wrote under bumblebee with Kallista and Adrionis! I am so happy for your thoughts. I was invested in everything you said. Took notes. I still can't accept the fact that i just got an amazing critique session for FREE? ;-; thank you so much. I do have a problem with tense. I knew it was gonna be one of the first things pointed out. Tense is my enemy but i will follow your advice of sticking to past tense since its easier. The tips on the figurative speech is so helpful, i will keep those pointers to heart. Thank you for the advice on dialogue tags. I actually try to avoid them as much as possible but i do realize they are important and I should start getting to add them back. In moderation of course. And the point of view switches. I have no idea why 2021 Maychen thought that it was okay to switch point of view in third person. Admittedly, i thought it was okay before I learnt about different types of third person POVs. prior to knowing that, I thought first person was the only POV type that needed indicators of switching. Big mistake and now i know better. Will keep that in mind and avoid confusing readers. I do have a confession.....before this not a lot of people read my stuff for two reasons. I am very insecure and I have 0 friends. I had the opportunity to have readers during high school but that was then, my writing was not really good. Didn't get any substantial feedback. Now that I am working on finishing novels, you would be one of the first strangers to really ever read my work and i am very grateful. Having people read your work is very helpful and although when i saw the upload, i felt a mini anxiety attack coming on, your tenderness and kindness eased my nerves and i was able to pay 100000% attention. Now i know not everyone who reads my stuff will do that but this experience has somewhat broadened the possibility of me sharing it with an even wider audience in the future to come. this was long. If you actually this far, thank you so much Kris! Your channel is a gem.

Love how periods become more and more natural and normal BECAUSE IT IS. It's not too embarrassing for me anymore when someone understands. 😊❤

"Her garment clung to her thighs, blood half-dried and crusting on her skin." I don't know whether to be impressed or disgusted with your enhancement of detail LOL

KRIS YOU ARE SO TALENTED I LOVED SEEING YOUR FEEDBACK. It definitely makes me consider a lot of things about my writing at the sentence level, and how it can imply so many larger developmental story structures and character details. I loved your submission 3 line edit :) Saying "anger" and "tension" but then using that scene in the car to illustrate WOW THE DIFFERENCE~~~and details of The Corolla, cigarettes, floral perfume. PERFECT.

Was excited for this one! It's interesting to see the way you critique work that isn't your own. Would love to see part 2 if this is something you'd like to continue. Also, congrats on 2k subscribers!

This was such a fascinating video!! Your feedback is so well constructed, while also being kind and giving writers a really strong jumping off point for revision. I love the way you use line editing to get at bigger "developmental" issues like plot and character. I guess it seems kind of obvious that the prose would effect that but it always surprises me how much you can convey just by changing individual sentences. I think sometimes I have trouble with feedback that just asks general questions about character or plot, because it's hard for me to think about how to answer those those questions in revision without some kind of example. But this was such a clear representation of bridging the gap between reader's questions/impressions to possible solutions. Thanks for another great video! I'm really excited to jump back into my novel now! (ps. idk if this comment made it sound like it - but I wasn't one of the writers you critiqued, just a fascinated viewer :)

ROFLMAO .... sorry, I should've clarified. "Idoontity" was the title. Both of your suggested alternatives for Daryl's nonsense spiel (which I kept vague for the sake of pace) got me thinking on it more. It definitely has the potential to be a funnier line. I understand where you're coming from on using italics to turn his thoughts on his own actions into a separate voice. However, I consider keeping it the same voice, which as you pointed out causes some disorientation, adds to the experience. Hmmm, the nature of the job SHOULD be explored more ... and now that your edits have cast it at a specific angle, I see the absence of a major theme I would love to thread into the piece as a whole: the fact that thousands of people every day entrust their lives to the hands of people like this who just aren't in the right headspace to hold that power. I think a bit of selfishness plays into it, in that Daryl (whose vibe the narrator feeds upon, wittingly or not) takes the tedium of his 9-to-5 job and exaggerates it into existentialism for the sake of attention. By the way, it was a treat to see bumblebee's and Livy's excerpts. Wishing them luck. :)

Love love love this! I found your feedback really powerful and 'just right' 😌 Thank you, I can now continue writing my novel with a bit more clarity and keeping in mind what descriptions are essential 🥰 Looking forward to part 2 🤩 Hopefully when you open the form again, I'm ready to submit and be given feedback

You’re critique was so thoughtful. I love the detailed way you approach line editing.

This is wonderful. All of it. I didn't submit a piece, but all of this advice is so helpful!

Such a helpful video ☺️💕 !! Can’t wait for Part 2

this was a great video! it was both entertaining and incredibly helpful-would love to see a part two

Wowww this was so helpful!! Your feedback also shows your skill with all that you found. Thank you!!

This is soo helpful, ngl in this video I'm getting fun teacher vibes from you. I want to read all of these books, can't wait to see what the authors do with them. Hopefully one day they'll get published.

Thank you sm Kiris! I love how anyone can take tips from these critiques

Thoroughly enjoyed this video! Your insight and edit suggestions are so helpful and eye-opening. Would love to see more!

This video is wildly helpful you are an angel and a talent 🙌🏽

Are you going to do a part 2 for the other ones?

you write so well T.T