1 in 100: Oliver's VSD diagnosis and an update from us ❤️‍🩹 

I had a VSD (also huge) and was failing to thrive. Had open heart surgery at a couple months old. Turning 27 in March and have had 0 other health issues!! Good luck little Oliver!!! ❤

My son was born with a hole in his heart. It was a terrifying time. He is now 22.

Fellow Heart Mama here! My son had an ASD that they found on my 20 week ultrasound. He had surgery just after his 1st birthday and is now a rambunctious 3 and a half year old. You've got this and you are not alone! I remember our surgeon indicating that while this is (obviously) a significant point in our lives, this is his day-to-day. He has completed this procedure again and again and again.

I was born with a VSD too, was diagnosed and had open heart surgery by the time I was 4 months old. I’m 30 years old now, happy, healthy, and have had zero health issues related to my heart after that. And most importantly, I’ve not had to change my lifestyle in any way to accommodate this. The doctors had assured my parents (even back then) that this was probably one of the most fixable issues- just a hole in the plumbing! Stay strong Elyse 💪. Oliver will be fine!

Hi Elyse. My Grandfather was born in 1921, and he had the same birth defect. I guess for the first several months of his life his mother carried him around on a pillow since he was delicate. He had surgery on his little baby heart, and lived a long, happy, active life - had 6 children, oodles of grandchildren, and lived to be 83. Later, one of my cousin's (same grandfather) had a son who had the same thing, and he had the surgery and recovered beautifully. She said the hardest part was that he couldn't eat before the surgery and she hated that she couldn't explain the situation to him. He is in his 20's now, and again, living a wonderfully active life. I'm so proud of you for processing your feelings. Everything you are feeling is exactly what you need to be feeling.

During stressful health based situations like this, I eventually learned that a good question to ask is something along these lines: “If Oliver was your son, what would you do?” Sometimes a question like that helps to open productive conversations. You and your husband appear to have a lovely relationship. Such a blessing.

As a pediatric RT, RN, and now Ped NP student, I so SO so appreciate hearing your honest point of view of what it is like to be on your side, processing this information as a parent. Thanks!

Elyse I have never heard you so clear and in control of everything. You have found your voice and strength in the care of your son. Sending strength and love for a great surgery and healing. ❤❤❤

Kids will ask the questions they’re prepared to have answers to. Telling him that Oliver has to have surgery, and asking what questions he has, is a really solid place to start. It lets August lead the conversation and take things at his own pace, and helps you titrate the appropriate info for his age level.

My daughter had no pulmonary valve, VSD, and pulmonary arteries were huge. She had open heart surgery at 5 months. She is 8 now.

I had my VSD repaired at age 45 (I'm 60 now). When I met with my surgeon, he could tell I was nervous. He said he had just operated on a weeks-old baby. That comforted me somehow. I felt like if he was able to do a delicate operation on a tiny heart, then my adult heart would do just fine. Wishing your family the best.

even in challenging times, you tell a story with charm and vulnerability. i was born with a fast growing tumor in my little baby skull and wound up in medical books. they told my parents i’d never speak, behave normally, survive the surgeries i did - all that to say, sixty years later - i’m great. won’t shut up. had an extraordinary life. and that my friend, is what Oliver is destined for as well. sending goodness.

Praying for little Oliver and the whole family too! ❤️‍🩹 my husband had VSD and was operated on in 1976. He is almost 50 now and living his best life with me and our four kids 🥰🥰🥰 Praying Oliver has the best Drs and nurses and makes a full recovery! ❤️‍🩹

Medical momma here, you have my prayers. For Oliver, his heart, the procedure, you all too as you have limited control in this process, wisdom for the surgeons and fast healing. My daughter was a few months old with her first procedure and the surgeon (father of five) told me that while in the operating room my daughter was his only child. I needed to hear that.

My daughter had ASD. Needed a full open heart surgery with a patch to repair it. She was running 3 days afterwards. I'm scarred mentally but she has only a minor scar physically and no bad memories of that traumatic experience. I'll pray and thank yoi for your updates. You have an army behind you and your family.

Dear Elyse, thank you so much for this. My son, who is currently 3 months old, also was diagnosed with a large VSD when he was two days old. He is doing well thankfully and we are also scheduled for open heart surgery in April. Life is pretty challenging rn and I can relate to everything that you are saying so much! All will be well! Best wishes for you and your family ❤

"My stomach just never feels good" is the PERFECT description of the feeling of a parent when there's a health issue with your babies, no matter their age. 🥺 Sending prayers. 🙏Much love to you all, Elyse! ❤❤❤❤❤❤

It's scary to feel the shift into the Fast Lane in healthcare, but it means there's a clear path for treatment and they're confident in the next steps. As alone and scary as it feels, this path has been taken by so many other parents of babies that are grown and having their own babies... ❤❤❤

I am absolutely loving all the mamas of heart surgery champions and actual champs themselves. Once again, Elyse you have brought people together to share this common bond. I hope their stories of resilience bring you strength and hope as you make your way through this with your baby!

Heart warrior mamas unite! My 2.5 yr old son was born with a hole in his heart as well and had open heart surgery at 5 months. Thank you for sharing your story and journey. It’s an intense experience and the support you end up receiving means the world! Also, I definitely needed my mom for support, she walked with me for hours while my son was in surgery.

My ultrasound tech couldn’t tell me that my son was going to be born without a hand. But she said “I’ve been doing this a looong time and I’m really good at what I do…” with a very pointed look. And I was just like “wow! Good for you!” Also, the waiting for the real adults to show up is so real. It makes me realize my parents were just flying by the seat of their pants the whole time, too. Best wishes to your little family Elise. It’s very very scary to learn there is something different with your baby. Kids are EXTREMELY resilient. So resilient. A saying I cling to in troubled times is “This too shall pass. It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.” You are good parents. You will get through this.

As someone old enough to be your mom, "Honey, take a deep breath". My grandson had a similar surgery at 3 months old. His heart is fine now. He has Down syndrome and my son was told that it's common. It's stressful, you are worried, I'm sure. Praying for you and Oliver. Blessings!

Hi Elyse, my baby has tetralogy of fallot which includes a vsd and a small pulmonary valve. He had open heart surgery at three months to correct both and we just had another two months ago when he was 2 and a half to finish correcting the pulmonary valve. I remember feeling what you are describing. I vacillate still between gratitude and being terrified. You will be surprised how quickly he recovers. For your toddler, I may suggest Daniel Tiger’s episode about going to the hospital, which is free on RU-vid. Oliver will live an incredible life thanks to the incredible work and collaboration of a lot of nerdy people.

You are a beautiful soul. I am sending Oliver and your family prayers for healing and comfort! ❤ You are doing an amazing job!

When it comes to your older son, there are usually some great resources at children’s hospitals to help with this. Child life specialists are incredible resources for children and their families when it comes to navigating hospitals/medical events and are specially trained in helping to explain these things to kids of all ages. As a 20 year pediatric nurse and now pediatric surgical nurse practitioner, I literally rely on them daily. As questions come up in your mind make sure to write them down-absolutely every day a family will tell me “I know I had questions I’ve been thinking about all day but now that you are here, I can’t remember it” so I give everyone that advice. Best wishes to your entire family ❤️❤️

My sister was born with VSD and she'll be turning 30 in a week. I wish you and Oliver and the rest of the family good luck as you navigate this together.

You are amazing! You explained everything so well including what you are going through, what you hear vs. what is said, saying the unknowns out loud. You are doing everything you possibly can and showing the world at the same time. This will make such a difference for others going through medical issues with their children. You and your family are in our hearts and prayers. Oliver will come through this with flying colors!

Just sending so much love to you from Ireland. I've been a follower of yours for about a year, I'm recently diagnosed with AuDHD and a mom of 3. I recognise so much of myself in you, the crochet, the joy of special interests, I'm even a swiftie now! But above all I remember those moments of fright when a kid was sick and thinking "when are the Real Parents getting here to take over, cuz I can't cope". Please take it day by day and try not to worry about the long term in any of this, also don't spend forever researching stuff yourself on Google, I know you will, but it can cause more anxiety. It's helpful too, and remember that doctors who use language like "from teeny to large, it's large" are likely on the spectrum themselves and have poor communication skills themselves. You've been on my mind since I saw this video this morning and I'm really channelling a lot of Tiger Mom strength your way to help you navigate the road ahead. Baby steps. Teeny steps. K?

My mom is 58 and had a hole in her heart the size of a quarter. She was one of the first kids to have open heart surgeries in the the 60s, in the Houston area at age 3. I'm sending you all the love, there is hope ❤

My son's surgery was at 4 months, and he had a 3-year-old brother, so I know what you are going through. I'm glad you have an outlet. You will get to the other side of this. Hang on while you do. All your boys are lucky to have you.

Your mindfulness for everything is so wonderful. I can’t imagine hearing that news as a parent. I think all of us would’ve been stunned. I was born with a hole in my heart and heart murmur. The doctor told my mom that I would never be athletic or physical. I am now 41 and played sports my entire life, all of them that were offered. I never had any issues, and it was constantly checked throughout my childhood to make sure that it was closing up and it did. The biggest affected on me for my lifetime so far was me having to tell doctors and Dentists about it, and them wanting to give me antibiotics before dental procedures. That has literally been it. So much healing to him and I’m sure this little guy will be perfectly good in no time.

I really love that you’re trying to give equal attention to your sons. Growing up, my brother had intense ADHD and ODD (Opposition Defiance Disorder), and because he needed so much attention, I didn’t get much. I’m 19 now and it hasn’t been as normal as it looked for other kids. I’m a people pleaser and every friend I’ve ever made has walked all over me and dropped me at the flip of a switch, and because I didn’t know what a healthy relationship looked like, I became a victim of sexual assault. I’m doing better, but wish I knew before. I applaud your efforts as a momma and hope you continue doing what you’re doing, and wish the best of luck for you and your family ❤️

I'm a brand new NICU nurse, and I really appreciate you sharing your perspective and journey as a parent. This is so helpful for me to hear, since I'm gonna be the nurse for families in this situation, but I don't have kids of my own to compare it to yet. Thanks for being vulnerable, and sharing your human experience that gives us all perspective. Sending love to your family ❤

My oldest sister had to have heart surgery when she was an infant. She has quite the scar from it, she just turned 60 and has danced (ballet) for most of her younger years. You got this ❤ Sending vibes of healing and good energy your way 🥰

The “best” part is that so many people in the world love your family and are sending good wishes your way. Im glad you can share this- possibly helping other young parents process similar information in the future. ♥️

Thank you for being vulnerable about this. So many people keep their family medical emergencies to themselves, but without sharing, families can't get support. Your bravery and the cascade of supportive comments helps myself and I imagine many others show the importance of sharing a crisis. I wish you the best on these next few trying months.

While I wasn't as young as Oliver, I had to have pretty much emergency surgery when I was very young, and seeing this video is kind of like seeing that situation through my parent's perspective in hindsight. The fear, the worry, the love shining through: it makes my heart hurt for all that your family is going through. I know it's so scary; just know that your entire viewer base is sending love and support to you all, and that there is and will be a time outside of this immediate whirlwind, as you described it. Just rest, breathe, and definetly eat barbeque!!

You're a gem. The way you share your life with the intention of it helping someone else somewhere at some time is amazing. Wishing you, your husband and your little one all the best moving forward.

Thank you for the update. Praying for Oliver and your family. 🙏 ❤

I’m just in awe of you, being so wonderfully you! You are the one for this job, and you’re doing it perfectly. Sending huge hugs to you and baby Oliver!

My son was born with transposition of the great vessels. Surgery at 4days. I felt all the feelings you describe. Tomorrow we are going for his 23 year cardiology check up. I still can’t sleep the night before his appointment. Wish I had all the technology you have now back then . It was very scary not knowing. My son went to college on a baseball scholarship. A very normal life. Wish you guys the best and know he will do amazing things. ❤❤❤

The "looking for the parents, oh wait im the parent" is so real. I have 4 daughters my first when i was 19 and i have had this feeling so many times. I spent a lot of years giving into the "elders" around me bc its such an odd concept in this society where we arent given the permission or whatever it is to be adults but we are told we are adults. Im 40 now, ive been through the health scares and money issues and i still find myself looking for a "grown up" to help from time to time. Thank you for saying this out loud. This needs to be normalized so people take control and realize their own strength much sooner. My daughter went blind temporarily from a rare auto immune disorder, i found a way through, she found a way through, YOU will find a way through ❤❤❤

I love how clear you where in your explanation of what was happening to your family. I hope there was some comfort in sharing. I am wishing you all the best possible outcomes. Many blessing love and ease in moving through this

Thank you for being so real and transparent. Sending good vibes to Oliver.

My BIL and a childhood family friend were both born with a hole in their heart. They both had surgery and are absolutely fine and in their 40s and 50s. One is actually a champion martial artist. My love to you all ❤

Praying for a successful surgery sweet Oliver, comfort for your family and peace as you navigate through this challenging time.

I’m praying for you and your family mama! “Walk by faith not by sight” this is a quote I always use when going through hard times

Thank you so much for sharing and being so open and honest about this ❤ The way you speak about your family sounds so loving and real. I wish all the best for little Oliver and your family.

I was born with VSD that resolved on its own around when I turned 5 (I'm now 35.) The only limitation I ever had was I wasn't allowed to play pee-wee soccer, which I was very upset by only bc my older siblings played. I was still allowed to take swimming lessons, and learned to ski. It sounds like Oliver is getting good care. Be gentle with yourself too Elise. Sending y'all love and light! 🥰

I can so relate. My son was life-flighted to Children's in Omaha at 5 days old. And underwent open heart surgery at 9 days old. He's now 12 years old and has had 2 more surgeries since. Children's is great. - Much love and faith for you and your family.

youre so precious, thank you for letting us know so we can pray and send you all light and peace.

You are so beautifully eloquent, even when talking about something so scary. I appreciate your honest discourse on what's going on - it helps make it easier for people going through the same thing to not feel so alone. Good luck to little Oliver and peace to your family!!

Can I make a small recommendation? I’m a doctor. It can be helpful for you to bring a friend. Even if your husband is there. Bring a friend. You and Jonas have everything wrapped up, all the anxiety, nervousness, questions, fear, love. A friend can listen more impartially, take notes, remind you of questions you had earlier, and then help you remember it later. A lot of children’s hospitals have patient navigators or social workers that can help walk you through it, too. Don’t be afraid to reach out. So many hugs to you.

When I was born, my parents were told I would never have a normal life because of sickle cell. Now, I've lived 31 years of as normal a life I could've asked for and am a good candidate for the cure. Having a sick child is a terrifying new reality, but it can also teach you how precious life is and how worth it all the hard times can be when you get to the other side. I wish you the absolute best with your son's surgery. You're the best mom he could ever have ❤

As the mom of a medically complex child, I understand your sentiments so well. Especially the whole change of POV when it comes to what good news is. You are a good mom. You will do everything that needs to be done for your kiddos when they need it. People will comment on how strong and amazing you are and how they “could never do what you’re doing”, etc. But now you know differently. You’re a mom who loves her children. ❤ Peace in the next few weeks as you all go through this process. May Oliver come out just as strong and happy of a boy as he always has been.

Just coming across this and cannot thank you enough for creating so much awareness for something so few know little about. I have a son with a severe and complex CHD that is not repairable and requires lifelong palliative care. I have another on the way with a tiny VSD. Regardless of size or enormity, these are real and scary diagnoses. Creating a village is paramount in managing them, so thank you again! You’re now a “heart mom”, and you know love for your little on a different level. ❤

You got this. Sending all the love and gentle thoughts for you and your family. Thank you for sharing the realness of life.

You'll get through this. Both of my daughters had open-heart surgery. They are 36 and 35 now and absolutely perfect. Wrapping you all in prayer and love.

Thank you so much for using your platform for sharing your son’s CHD and your journey. It is so common but so unknown! My daughter was diagnosed with a critical CHD among a handful of others. A VSD being one. She had open heart surgery at 13 months old and has been so amazing since.

You are one of my all-time favorite story tellers. You are also a champion human being and mother. August and Oliver are absolutely blessed to have been picked by the universe to be your children.

As a nicu nurse i really appreciate you sharing this vulnerable video. We often times support families, deliver news, and take care of babies without hearing the internal dialogue and struggle of families. Im praying for you and cheering your little one on ♡

My daughter inherited my multivalve prolapse. When I got pregnant they suggested either having an abortion or see specialists bc of the risks to me. Didn't think she would inherit it, but she is thriving now and we can only monitor and hope for the best. He has the best mama for how strong you are.

We love you! Praying for you and your family. I can’t handle the stress of news and politics and your content brings me so much joy in dark times.

Elyse, I am in awe of how clearly and calmly you were able to share all of that, and so descriptively as if you just walked out of the doctor's office. I felt like I was sitting in the room with you as you explained it (and while you were processing you are also actively walking through and helping others too - connecting with your followers even more especially those who may be experiencing this same situation). I began watching you because you are real. I have ADHD, (all 3 of my adult kids have something lol, let's just say we each have our own alphabet of issues - some shared some not -lol). We laugh a lot, but we also learn together and bond more through it all. I have been able to relate to almost all of your reels - when it came to self-conscious thoughts, habits, feelings, whether adhad, ocd, any of that stuff. Life in general. And I love how you deliver with honestly and humor, straight-faced most days or with the best facial expressions (which come on, are mostly the straight-faced ones, because they make it so much funnier...). My family and I are that way too. Today (well yesterday now) your post is about something that is not funny, not at all. I am so sorry you, Oliver, August and your husband are going through this. The fact that you shared it the way you did; authentically, genuine, mixed emotions of how you are feeling and continuing to process, is not only such a really brave thing to do, but it's so supportive. And I can only imagine how that genuine heartfelt support will come back to you from all those who not only watch you, but care about you. You have always shared so authentically. No bells no whistles... just you (and us listening / watching) for real. This video reflects that same thing about you 100%. I have always admired your courage and appreciated knowing we aren't the only ones with what we face on a daily basis. Once again you let us in, sharing your own feelings, but simultaneously showing such empathy and compassion by opening up to others who might need to have someone there for them like your husband and parents are there for you (and I am sure many other). While I have not gone through what you are now, and I cannot imagine what that is like, I have been in the ER in fear for my infant's life (he really liked the hospital I think, we were there quite often). They said he had asthmas-I didn't believe the diagnosis, but that's neither here nor there. He is 19 now, but I will never ever forget the fear of the unknown -standing one night in the hospital room facing a potential chest tube within the hour then a life flight helicopter trip to a children's hospital an hour away that I was unable to be on...OR face the alternative. I will never forget wanting to try to fix it, having to trust his care of others to do that for us, not knowing what was really going on inside his little body...and knowing that he was now different. Even more fragile than he already was...how was that even possible? Parenting can be so scary sometimes- right, like looking for the other grown-ups in the room--- so relatable. Somehow just do it, whatever is needed, and we make it through. Definitely with support systems. I love your husband's support for you- how you shared his focus of helping you calm enough and be present, so you both could be a team in hearing what doctors/surgeons were saying. You mentioned how that he did that patient and lovingly. People need to hear the positive in relationships (as there are far too many that aren't). They need to hear what is healthy and what should be during the times our emotions are in question and and hearts are hurting. Last thoughts in this giant ADHD non-friendly but habit like message... (sorry

Thanks for sharing. My little one. Now two. Was diagnosed with a malformed lung. And while our experiences are different they are similar they way we found out was similar to your story and she had surgery at 7 months old. And had to go through similar testing. I tell you that to say… you aren’t alone in your feeling as a mom with a small baby trying to keep them safe. You perception of “good news” changing. That he will recover from this etc .. but man oh man what a hard journey as a parent. You’re doing a great job being a advocate for him even tho it’s so hard for yourself. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this season.

Thank you for doing this video. My strong, healthy 20 year old had an ASD & VSD repair at 6 months. Be gentle with yourself. TBH I’m still neurotic when he gets sick. The helpless feeling when your child is ill is the worst part of being a parent. I wish I had asked for more support and probably gotten more therapy 😂. Sending your whole family love.

You’re strong AF and incredibly kind to share yourself so openly with us. I am so thankful to follow such an amazing person and learn so much from.

Sending you lots of love and praying for Oliver’s full recovery. I’m also praying that you and your family get relief and calm soon.

Thank you for sharing this ❤ it must not be easy to speak about to the internet

Miss Elyse, you bring sunshine and laughter to my life. Thank you for being you. All positive energy sent your way for Oliver and for you, your husband and August.

Praying for you and your family! Thankful he was presenting and growing so well. That will help him heal! Miraculous even. ❤

Hey girl. Love your positivity even when it's not easy. A family member was one of the 1st ppl in Canada to have this diagnosis and surgery. She's in late 70s now. We're so fortunate. Thank you for sharing. It's OK to be scared and be vulnerable. Wishing you and your family love

Oh my goodness, I feel for you & your fam. Please don’t hesitate to lean on your support system. Keeping your son’s health in my thoughts and prayers.

When I saw this post, I didn’t know what to say. I was afraid of it coming off wrong to someone who is carrying so much. I saw BarrNone’s clip on IG. I knew I had to come back to tell you, you are a great mom! Your boys are so lucky to have you as their mom. You’ve helped so many people with such big things. Like, “I’m happy to be alive.” And sincerely meaning it. I haven’t gotten there in my life, but I know it’s possible. Because people who have much heavier things going on in their life, are truly happy to be alive. Keep being a great mom for those babies. Jonah, I really appreciate how well you know your wife. You’re a great dad too. Sincerely, thank you for sharing your story. 💖 Being a parent is so hard. Knowing you’re not alone with numbers like 1 in 100 is going to help so many parents who feel as alone as you did before recording this video. 💖

As a mom of a baby with a CHD that wasn’t found until after she was born, I resonate with so many of the things you talked about. Thank you for sharing and helping us feel support as mamas of these sweet special babies.

Wishing you all the strength and peace as you navigate this! My brother was born with VSD as well, and he kept getting sick so his surgery kept getting postponed. Went in for a last check before surgery date, and the hole had started closing by itself- at 9 MONTHS OLD- unheard of! He never had the surgery as a child, and the hole closed so small that the blood passing through it made a "WHOOSH" sound so loud you could hear it without a stethoscope! Medical students would always come listen and be amazed! He didn't have any trouble with it until recent years when the heart formed a muscle bundle that was not allowing enough oxygen supply, so he just had open heart surgery a few months ago and is doing fantastic! He's a happy 26-year old.

As a nurse it makes my heart hurt and also fill with joy to watch your journey through this. I struggle so much with watching my patients struggle through the health care system, and try to lift them up as much as possible. I pray that your medical team surrounds you with confidence and peace. I pray for your little family as you process and deal with this new diagnosis and journey. I have always so appreciated your honesty, and you have helped me so much in my own journey with mental health. I wish I could do more but I send my prayers and love to you and your family!

Sending love Elyse! Be kind and gentle to yourself, I never had a sick baby, my kids were sooo healthy and strong but my teenager almost died from a blood infection when he was 14 and I have never been the same. Staying in a place of gratitude and having a positive attitude is so key and you’re doing great! Sending you and Jonas so much good energy

Thank you sharing. While it is so hard for you and your family to get your heads around this information now one day someone else will be sat as stunned as you are now and finding your post will help them feel less alone and lonely. My thoughts will be with you until you post it’s all over and your baby is all healed ❤

The CHD family is amazing at helping new parents and patients deal with all the questions and processing the news. There are many support groups, hope you find people that will help you know what to expect. All cases are unique with their own paths, but there are similarities that can guide what is to come...There is so much info now out there then just a couple of years ago, but there are still so many people that don't realize that at the ultrasound we should ask about the heart, and before leaving the hospital the baby should get their oxygen checked. Thank you for sharing and helping spread awareness. This journey is a hard one but with a great support system it can be a beautiful one too. My daughter was born with HLHS, has a pacemaker but she is 19, heart warrior ❤ Sending lots of love and prayers for a speedy recovery and good surgery.

My cousin, born in the 60s, was also born with this. The medical options today versus back then are phenomenal. You're doing a great job, parenting is the toughest job in the world and you've been thrown a real curve ball. Keeping you and your family in my thoughts.

❤❤❤I just had all the feels right along side you! My daughter (now 4 years old) was born with a rare heart defect (Truncus arteriosus). She was diagnosed at 2 days with open heart surgery at 8 days old. So much info given from the doctors when they found it! I just want to give you a hug and say it’s going to be ok! Stay strong Mama, you got this. I’ll be praying for you too! ❤❤❤

Goodness, that’s a LOT to process immediately! Sending all my love and strength! Thank you for sharing your story. 💝

Thank you for sharing. You're doing such a good job, you are such a good mum. You've got this. Sending you so much love.

Intense medical issues with our kids put us in a club we never wanted to join. It’s is a life changing thing that makes us see the world differently. Even when our outcome is good, the trauma of the process is real. Our future outcome doesn’t change our present processing. Every emotion you feel, every emotion you can’t feel and every bit of your uncertainty is valid and real. Nothing prepares you, but a listening ear can hear you and remind you that you were chosen to be Oliver’s mama as he goes through this. Minute by minute, you are going to be everything he needs in the moment he needs it. Same for August and Jonas. You are enough, Elyse. And sharing your journey as far as you can helps those who hear it in that moment. I’m proud of you for loving your sons so well and seeking to give them 100% of the best of you. I hope that telling you I have been praying for you and your family doesn’t offend, but rather encourages you to know that I truly believe the Creator of the universe is able to bring perfect peace to your hearts in this inexplicable time. I know you were made with a purpose and it is beautiful. So also is Oliver’s purpose. And I have a feeling there are many many years to come that will unveil all of that. Blessing to you and yours, sweet girl. This Alaska mama is with you in heart and spirit.❤

My brother was born with a hole in his heart as well but we didn’t know until almost 17 years ago when we almost lost him thankfully u are able to find out now and he can get the help he needs GOOD LUCK AMD PRAYERS to your family

Praying for little Oliver & you all as his surgery date approaches, & will continue to pray! You have blessed me so much with your humor & encouragement & I hope you feel the love and prayers of so many people thinking and praying for you & your little boy! 💜🙏🏻

Sending lots of hugs your way. Thanks for keeping us updated- will be thinking of you all in the upcoming weeks. I’m in toddler and newborn phase as well, it’s a lot but so special.

Thank goodness for crochet. ❤ As I’m sure you’re finding, it’s the perfect thing to soothe anxious feelings. Amigurumi and all the counting involved is wonderful for anxiety as well. Sending so much love your way! It was so comforting to read all the beautiful comments about those who had similar experiences. ❤

Oh mama! 24 year cardiothoracic nurse here- you got this! It’s scary, but so good he was diagnosed now, while he’s healthy and strong. I take care of adults who don’t find out they have this until there are other huge issues. Kids are so resilient! This being taken care of now, will ensure he continues to grow and thrive! Top notch work of your doctors for finding it!

Aww thanks for sharing. Sending much love and healing thoughts your way. You got this mama 💕

We're ready to hear any updates if and when you're ready to share them. Please don't feel alone! I'm so glad you caught it now, and so happy Oliver is developing well in spite of the VSD. Sending love and care from a grown-up baby with a "teeny" VSD! (I'm a loud one... a lot of times, the smaller the defect the louder the murmur.) My VSD never closed... 38 years later, I honestly forget that I still have it. I'm hoping and wishing the same for Oliver... that in a few years, you'll look back on this experience as an unexpected twist but not a "main event". My family and I are thinking of Oliver, you and your family, as are so many others. Also, thanks for sharing the crochet tutorials. I've recently started crocheting to give my ADHD hands (and my depression/anxiety brain!) an outlet other than my phone. ❤‍🩹

Ty for talking about all these things your the realest "influencer" there is hands down. "The internet's best friend" you speak on it all the good the bad n the ugly. Ty for that. We have far too many ppl act like there lives are perfect n filter there lives or use the bad things as their entire platform. You speak about it all. You have beautiful moments that are very touching and you have extremely terrifying ones like this that's real life that's how life works and especially children growing up need to understand this. I am so glad that this all went well for you and your beautiful child they are both so lucky to have you and your husband I'm sure this was a terrifying experience and I'm so sorry you had to go through it but it's just a testament to your strength as well as your child's. Keep sharing all the real stuff in in your life you make happiness seem obtainable to those of us struggling and that is something many ppl can not do regardless of the sad music they play in the background I'm not trying to knock any other creators I'm just saying that watching your RU-vid videos or your shorts feels like sitting down in the having a talk with you your best friend and what you know very well and can laugh about the good cry about the bad and relate with. Your emotions are so real because you always keep it real I love that you keep going no matter what it's inspirational t.y again and you will get threw this as you do everything else I have a friend whose childhood cancer in the statistics that he would get it again were huge is now 3 years in remission and mystic they're going down more and more his father felt the same way like he was more afraid after he was done treatment because he was so terrified of it coming back or something that happening and he felt like he wanted to put him in a bubble and never let him out but he wanted to live his life to the fullest. Thankfully he is in remission he's doing phenomenal he's in school now and now and if anything doing better than all of the kids. I attribute a lot of that obviously to the child and the child strengths but also to the fact that his father stayed come through it at least in front of him and was very supportive. Your child is too very supportive parents that are amazing. He also has prayers coming in from around the world I don't know what your belief system is but you have a big group of people rooting for your child. Sending Good vibes energy ECT to your family.. it's okay not to be okay you've taught us all that Pizza barbecue chicken nuggets that's fine right now Mama you're doing the best you can and inspiring us all as you do it 🩷

I’ve been thinking of you and your sweet family, ever since I saw your announcement. You’re handling this with so much grace and poise! We love you!!

Bless you and your family. I can only imagine how terrifying this is for you. Thanks for sharing and I’ll be watching for updates on baby Oliver. I’m glad at least he’s not struggling and it was caught before issues. ❤

My son had a cardiac pacemaker implanted in November of 2022 and you perfectly described the feeling of overwhelm and gratefulness all at the same time. Wishing you and Oliver all the best! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

9:20 - August has no benchmark. You can help set it. I think you’ll be really surprised at what toddlers are capable of comprehending… or at least comprehending in their own way. I have found mine often approach new things, typically scary or complex things, with a sense of awe! They simply don’t know any better… and in some cases the response is the correct one and we adults are wrong. This is a tremendous opportunity to showcase the wonders of modern medicine and how kick ass the human body is at healing itself. You said it yourself that 1-in-100 babies have VSD, it’s not an uncommon surgery… your little guy will be stronger from it. Good luck!!❤

Hi Elyse, I hope others with VSD also reach out to you. I am also 1 in 100 (plus Pulmonary stenosis +TGA). At some point it made me feel less alone to know, that there are other people/kids with the same/ similar disease. And I hope that other parents with kids with congenital heart disease reached out to you. This kind of community can be helpful. Even though I know from own experience that every CHD is different, but also every child is different, right? Take care of yourself. Happy to see that you are around here. Wishing you and your son (and family) all the luck in the world that you need, keep on going! Cornelia

Much love, Elyse, to you and your family. I hope Oliver gets through this quickly and you get all the love and help you need. ❤❤❤

Oh my goodness. That definitely is a lot to unpack and process. Prayers for your family. ❤