Let's discuss about At the End of One's Rope
Wherever there's the religion, it's cool and peaceful. Wherever a person practicing the religion is lacking, it's hot and troubled. If there's no religion, the heart is as hot as fire. Whenever there's the religion - mindfulness and discernment - investigating, looking after the heart, the heart is cool.
When we first begin suppressing the rebels in the heart, we suffer - because for the most part we're defeated by them - but at least we still have the strength to fight with them. Even though we may lose out to them sometimes, it's better than groveling before them in abject surrender with no way of putting up a fight at all.
The practice in the area of the mind falls into stages - and there are bound to be stages where it's complicated and difficult. Especially at the beginning: It's difficult in that we can't see beginnings or ends, causes or effects. We don't understand anything at all. When we take the rudiments of Dhamma we have gained from the texts or our teachers and put them into practice, sometimes right, sometimes wrong, this is when it's very difficult. The desire to know and see is very strong, but the heart isn't willing to comply.
This is one kind of anxiety I've been through myself. It overflowed the heart. To put it simply, it was as if the desire to see and know the Dhamma in the heart was ready to overflow its banks. But when practicing, the heart didn't comply with the desire to know and see - and that had me upset and disappointed. Sometimes I'd be sitting and the tears would flow because of my self-recriminations: 'You don't have any potential to speak of. You've ordained simply to be a dead weight on the religion. Here you are sitting in meditation and can't find a way in or a way out. You're just sitting buried in a heap of suffering.' The mind would think in all sorts of ways out of self-pity - that I was a hopeless case, that I didn't have any potential to speak of, didn't have the potential for the extraordinary levels of Dhamma, didn't have any potential at all - total confusion!
For example supposed my practice wasn't yet right. I was aiming at the results - the income - without paying attention to whether I was doing the work right or wrong. The desire was strong, but when it wasn't fulfilled, it caused suffering. Had I paid some attention to whether my practice was right or wrong, I might have come to my senses enough to have evaluated things, to have abandoned some of my bullheaded attachments, or to have cut back on my desires so that the suffering would have become lighter.
But whenever I'd meditate, whatever I'd focus on, all I wanted was to know and see the paths, the fruitions, and nibbana in line with what I imagined them to be - heaven was like this, the Brahma worlds were like that, nibbana was like this. I'd imagine. Speculate. The desire was fierce. I wanted to know, to see, to gain release from suffering, but my practice wasn't making any headway. All there was, was simple desire: I would simply sit wanting, lie down wanting, walk wanting, stand wanting. I'd sit in meditation - wanting - but the mind wasn't working at its meditation. It just wanted. I'd be doing walking meditation, but the mind simply wanted - so much so that I'd forget what I was doing. I wasn't getting any results because there weren't enough of the causes that would bring about the things I aimed for, so how could I have reached the goal I aimed for? This is something I've been through. The work of meditation struck me as being more difficult than any other work.: Buddhism is said to have the education and the General People Do Good .ខ្ញុំគ្រាន់តែចែករំលែកជាធម្មទានតែប៉ុណ្ណោះលោកម្ចាស់ឡុង ចន្ថាមិនពេញចិត្តសូមខមមិនខាងក្រោមខ្ញុំកូណានិងកែប្រែ។
*****************************
► RU-vid : goo.gl/Jga354
►Facebook Page :goo.gl/gZxiVu
► Dhamma Education : goo.gl/q4UvFw
******************************
❤ Like ✅Share ☑️ Comment
8 сен 2024
