My fear of somebody reading my "honesty" stopped when I let go of the NEED to control that person's response to what I have to say to myself in my private notes. Incidently :-), I worked it out while journaling :-). Needles to say, that newfound attitude, changed a lot in my personal and professional life. BUJO is outstanding. I am forever grateful to Ryder for sharing the genius of it with the world.
It still amazes me how we still feel the need to "hide" even from ourselves. Journaling is indeed a great practice to help us be more authentic, and this is why the Daily Log is my favorite part of Bullet Journal. This is where I try to open up and listen to myself. I love what you say about paying attention to what actually matters instead of what's supposed to matter. Thank you for the video. I needed it.
that is understandable. it is imperfect. but others have suggested journaling very honestly in other places, and then transferring key insights into your BuJo. that might help minimize that fear/vulnerability while still getting the benefits? at least to begin with?
I think journaling became powerful for me when I talked about subjects that either never come up in organic conversations or felt too akward to discuss with even my close friends and family. Sometimes you want to rant about something completely off topic and introspective that you know would bore the heck out of everyone but you. Journals will always listen :)
As a student, bujo is the best thing I started as my new year resolution, helped me track my progress and make habits I would have never been able to from past 1 year.
Thanks for reminder. Jumping back in to bullet journaling but taking time to start with the basics first. Just wrapping up first month. Off loading everything in my mind is powerful in itself. Being honest with oneself is a whole next level
yes! please note that these are things I've developed and experimented with over many many years, so it's great that you're going in stages that are helpful to you
This was EXACTLY what I needed to hear right now. I have just started bullet journaling and am still figuring it out. I have learned so much already and it has only been two months. I love how freeform it is and how much own personal format is evolving. The thing I am struggling with most is capturing my moods and emotions, and could see that this would be really helpful. This video really helped my pick up my pencil and write down what I feel RIGHT NOW! So this was both timely and super helpful. Thank you!😊
So glad this could be helpful! If it's not automatic for you to log how you feel you can also set some timers to see if that also reinforces the practice
Truly inspiring! The Bullet Journal method allowed me to connect with the journaling, with the handwriting, and with my feelings through the years. Thank you so much for sharing!!!✨
Excellent! Thank you. I was interested in seeing something about rapid logging versus long form journaling and how to incorporate the latter in a bullet journal so I found you had a video on that too! These two are very helpful together.
I think I enjoy the quiet rebellion of journaling what are usually censored thoughts and feelings, or things that are too taboo to say out loud. For much of our struggles, or even the slightest negative emotion seem to hold far too much stigma out in the outside world outside the safety of journaling, even more so if it's locked or hidden away where no one can see. I doubt I could have said uncensored words or uncensored action, if I wasn't even willing to explore or even think uncensored thoughts instead. If you don't even allow yourself to even THINK some of the things you want to do, then at the very least you should practice saying it to yourself in a journal. I think there is some space to be fine with an unfinished draft of writing in a journal. To not make it look perfect enough all the time, and to not have a strict sense of what is "good" or "bad" to write. A lot of people like to make their journal look visually stunning or to have some kind of beautiful visual presentation, but while that's good for me sometimes, to make it so that it has to "look good" without really allowing room for messy thoughts and feelings seems rather inauthentic to me.
what's funny is the point you mentioned about having difficulty writing certain things, i hav th oposite i rather not talk or express how i feel too much instead i write it all down, it is cool to notice the difference in writing.
Hey Ryder. I reallly do understand what you mean and think that it is very true. Real self-awareness and developement comes only through being honest. But I always fear, if I write honestly about my feelings about other people, that they - by coincidence - could read it and get hurt by my words. And that keeps sometimes from writing down my honest fears and feelings. How do you deal with that? Thanks a lot.
Thanks for this post. For me, too, very timely, as I have a lot of emotions around family coming up as well as emotions about my work and ensuing from my work, which is intense these days. Just wanted to share that I'm still not comfortable --for whatever reason--with writing many pages of personal thoughts (ie, diary entry) my Bullet Journal. When I expect I'll be writing more than a page or two, I go to my designated diary (book). I think the reluctance to fill my Bullet Journal with several consecutive pages of private thoughts has to do with the portability of my Bullet Journal, which goes everywhere with me and thus could get lost, vs the stationary placement of my diary-book, which stays in my home. Perhaps. Anyway, thank you.
a perfectly understandable hesitation. I said this in a different comment, in case this helps: It is imperfect. but others have suggested journaling very honestly in other places, and then transferring key insights into your BuJo. that might help minimize that fear/vulnerability while still getting the benefits? at least to begin with?
Hi Ryder Womderful to see a new video. Thank you so from my heart. You have such a calming voice gives me peace. Struggling with severe deppression. My non stop negative tape run. So I have been brain dumping ot to get ot out of my head. Rereading is hard. How can I use it to heal. When I calm down go back look at it and, how or what suggestions can you suggest to do? Blessings
I hope you can find a mental health professional who can counsel you as you look at these thoughts and reframe them. It helps if you can find one who is trained in cognitive behavior training (CBT).
we echo the suggestion to turn to a professional, but we did also see a great tip from someone on Reddit - they would journal on a separate page. Then they folded it and sealed it (envelope, washi tape, etc), and then would summarize the key insights on the outside of the journal entry with key words or phrases. Then taped it inside their bullet journal (optional, obviously). That way they can keep track of these insights but don't need to re-immerse in the vivid entries. Does that sound helpful?
So wise, so true! Thank you so much for all the inspiration in your videos. I stopped Bullet Journaling but always wanted to get into it again. I thought about tricks to get me into the habit again. The real reason was exactly what you said, it was an empty Performance. I changed my journaling from describing what happend to what my experience was. But it takes hours to write these things down. So, I fell off the waggon again. I now realize that I still wasn't honest enough and not connected to my inner thoughts and feelings (my general problem). I would like to restart but I am afraid that journaling takes too much time. Even my simple and basic monthly set up is pretty time consuming. Any tips how to just write the essence to keep it short(er)?
This was a timely watch for me. I was journaling just a little while ago and noticed that some of what I wrote seemed so generic. I could tell I wasn't being completely open
I agree that honesty is so valuable in understanding myself, but worry that my husband will read it and be hurt, or that my children would read it after I was gone.
Some things may be better written and then burned, or shredded. Yet there are many other topics to be honest and vulnerable about that do not have to include the most sensitive or private aspects of our life, that could still be helpful to you. Hope this helps.
totally understand that. we recently saw a comment from someone who writes their honest thoughts on separate paper to get it out, seals the entries in an envelope (or you could simply fold the entry up) and summarizes the thoughts with a few key points on the outside. That way they can still see the themes without needing to get trapped in the details of the negativity (plus some confidentiality!)
This is great advice, but I will add a caveat: sometimes choosing NOT to write about something or someone toxic in your life is the choice to become more free from it. There are a few people and a few events I chose to minimize in my memory, and it was a good choice. I have noticed some of the happiest people in my life tend to forget things that were Traumatic or challenging. I think in special circumstances, opting not to journal about these things, not to give them power or more neuronal pathways in your brain, can be healthy. Otherwise yes, journal everything! And be authentic!
Thank you for this message, really inspiring! Just some personal feedback: I found it difficult sometimes to focus on your wise words because of the distracting music/beats behind it. Not everyone is the same, so feel free to ignore this 😉
I am brand new to journaling, I am enjoying the process, but I struggle with what to write about. I write things down about my day and what i feel was significant. But I feel like its just the same stuff over and over. I am going to keep at it, but any suggestions on how to make it more interesting.
I find it difficult to be totally honest in journaling because I am worried about someone reading my thoughts. Thinking about it now, I believe that based on my past experience, I just don't trust anyone to keep my thoughts secret if ever someone read them.
I agree with the idea but I’m apprehensive if this would be helpful or even safe for someone experiencing severe clinical depression. I journal out baby steps in achieving my goals but stopped journaling my emotions years ago. I am unsure if writing about what I am feeling using radical honesty helped process anxiety and trauma of amplified a common struggle which is the anxious brains hyperfixation on the percieved anxiety or negative event.
As a caveat, I am certainly not a licensed mental health professional, so I can't offer anything besides what I've experienced or read. The hard part about creating these videos is knowing it will never account for everyone's experience. This message was more a lot of people who might overlook acknowledging the feelings behind their tasks at all, or gloss over emotions, and the benefit of actually naming what's going on underneath - where in the case of someone with depression, that strategy might not work
Thank you for this video. Ryder, I have a related question: after journaling negative emotions/ experiences, how do I avoid re-living those bad feelings when I read my entries again during monthly and chapter reviews? Recently I went through an experience with someone where we both came away hurt and angry, and we will never resolve it between us. (One of those situations where we both firmly believe the other was in the wrong.) When I read my entries from that time, I remember all the things they did that upset me and I get upset all over again. Should I just not read those entries any more?
this is a great question. based on some other ideas we've seen, you might try journaling somewhere else (Notes app, separate notepad) and then summarizing the key insights from the session to transfer into your BuJo. That way you can still retain the lessons, acknowledge the reality of your feelings, process it, but not necessarily rehash the details. Does that help?
Hey I think you just didn't get over the situation. It's a great opportunity to learn how to process feelings so they don't get stuck in your body and hurt you. I very recommend Gabor Mate's book "when the body says no" which explains how it happens and how to deal with the feelings. Also it's similar to Hawkins letting go technique (I don't recommend the whole book but the method is great). It's important we sit with our feelings and acknowledge them. It's okay we were hurt. It's not good to avoid it even if this is unpleasant. Of course we can't ruminate on the bad things that happened so when you do welcome, accept, thank and let go the feelings you have in yourself then maybe you'll be able to sum up the situation, draw conclusions and integrate it as a thing you learned, not the thing that hurt you. Love 💕
