God do I relate. And then you think, why not just go ahead and say cus I need to get over this meaningless anxiety anyway? And then when I say it and everyone looks at me and there's no reaction.... I'm just like..... frick. No. I shouldn't have said anything. I want to crawl into a hole and die and get rid of my existence.
@@derpy4335 And this is not how the world works too , ik ppl die alone but im sure that these ppl wanted someone to be with them but they just couldn't say it , i couldn't say it too , everyone thinks that I'm the happy calm person but i battle with myself everyday just to seem like everything is good when it's not . I want someone to find me even if i didn't ask for it , i don't want to look alone and sad because i love the ppl around me and i don't want to hurt them cuz ik i will if i said that . I posted this comment 6 months ago and i know the exact feelings that i felt in there and now i feel better which is good , and i did that without telling anyone that i feel like that , but trust me it would've been amazing if someone noticed it but this is what I got . Anyways ik i talked alot 😂 so Have a good day ❤️
Psych2Go i mean i wish i got to actually see my 4 friends once in a while and it makes me feel like they just have me around to pity me and that they talk about me behind my back
But then you worry that someone saw you typing and then you worry if they are judging you for being indecisive. So you feel more pressured to do something...ANYTHING. Ultimately ending in you just sending a complete mess of thoughts or living with the shame of not sending anything at all then you just stop messaging the group entirely.
I remember every time I texted in a class group chat I would close the messenger and turn off the internet on the phone because I was scared to see what would they answer .... :D
RIGHT! Then there’s always fucking JACOB who’s over there yelling out “ReAdY SpAgGhEtTi” or some shit with all his friends laughing and I’m over here like... “if only I could say that without internally dying of embarrassment and thinking everyone hated me right after”
Exactly. And even if I know what are their topics of interest , I know that I am not interested in that topic so I would not want to compromise and kill my mind and have that conversation. I hardly find people interested in the topics I like such as contemplating on the behaviour and process of mind , how to grow in life, how we can improve ourself, how to support each other and be kind, humanity or just talk about nature and gratitude or what new intellectual or creative thing one learnt. No one is interested . Everyone wants to talk about what’s happening in the world and give endless opinion!
Not everybody who has social anxiety is an introvert (*waves* as living proof). It doesn't mean you can't still be an introvert and have social anxiety. It just means the two aren't particularly linked, or the same thing. You can be either an introvert or an extrovert and have social anxiety.
@@Mal0406 god, do I relate!! It frustrates me so much! It's like they don't even want to talk to me!! So, I've stopped texting people, and guess what? They've stopped too..
Omg yes! I’d have to rehearse it and clear my throat a billion times just to quietly say “here” and felt so much relief after I saying it. I always felt like all my classmates would just stare at me and point and laugh¿ even though we all had to say the same thing
Puppymia Bramblepelt Just type fuck you guys on every group chat as long as it’s on internet then it’ll be ok, I always want to be alone but when i’m on youtube ? LET ROCK BOIII
I didn't really get rid of it, it just got a little better and I never got therapy I was just really hoping to please my mom is all. Still got anxiety and it is still generally bad but it had been slowly getting a little better over time, it may take years for it to be comepleatly gone I think that I've done pretty well just by myself
Aden Carlton That's pretty impressive man I'm really happy for you, the symptom I mentioned above is generally the last phase of SAD and stuff can't really get worse beyond that. In fact recovering from a severe SAD by yourself is very unusual yet so hard to impossible.
That’s fine. I do it too. If you stay silent for too long you almost lose your ability to speak properly. Speaking is a skill too you know. If you go on a hiatus don’t be surprised if you have a hard time reading your voice or pronouncing words properly when you do decide to open you mouth again. I encourage talking to yourself if you don’t have anyone else to talk to.
When I was in 8th grade, The teacher called me out because im in the few people who doesnt attend first day of school so I need to introduce my self, When she called me out and keep insisting what is my name i just stood there and whisper to her my name,age,and school i came from, she laugh and say "tell them not me" I was so embarassed and sat there quitely the whole time
i get so anxious to the point where when someone approaches me, i end up sounding cold and uninterested, like i’ll just mumble a “hi” and not even make any eye contact. i feel bad afterwards but it just feels like something i can’t control
I do both the things you two are talking about lol. Either I delete it or try not to offend anyone and go neutral even though I have a different opinion.
Usually when I talk in the chat a silence suddenly appear and no one answered me at all. But that's ok it's not like I wanna interact with them or anything.
@@maureen3122 seriously. My anxiety is so bad I sit there and think if I should leave to go to the bathroom or not. But it's only people I'm not close to
where’s the “im the cousin that isnt close to anyone because you’re too scared to converse with relatives at family gatherings and usually hide in your room until someone knocks on your door or yells for you to come out and say hi” team? 😌 very specific, yes i know.
Ok I'm probably just weird but hear me out. I am an introvert, and sometimes I can talk to people and start conversations in a heartbeat...but sometimes I feel nervous and scared how people think of me. It also happens when I'm around judgemental people. The weird thing is this happens RANDOMLY. I could be loud and obnoxious and then chill and very quiet.
I'm an introvert with social anxiety and I have the same thing. Asked my therapist about it, but it's nothing weird. We all have different sides of ourselves and we never wake up feeling like we felt yesterday. I can be loud and obnoxious on good days or around people I feel comfortable at. I might be anxious the next time I see them, depending on my mental health that day. Anyway, it's not weird at all so don't worry (:
I always thought I was an introvert, but recently I realised I have social anxiety. I would always get super nervous going to my English class because I would have to speak on that class. The whole time my palms would be sweaty, I would get a really dry mouth and I'm sure everyone thought I was weird. Goings to maths class I would be fine. I get scared going to the library at university in case all the seats are taken and I'll walk around looking stupid. In the past I would make plans with my friends and just before I would cancel or want to cancel because I suddenly felt kinda scared and that everyone hated me and didn't want me to come. I take ages to become comfortable with people as well and hate meeting new people, I like them once I'm comfortable with them. Whenever I goto the shop or restaurant I rehearse my order multiple times. I would never go to the gym by myself for fear of looking stupid or being watched. I would thunk about every conversation afterwards and how I should have said this and that. I remember a lot of the times when I made a fool of myself rather than the times I was happy and liked. I was super comfortable with my ex boyfriend but it turned out he was narcissistic and abusive. So now my social anxiety is so bad and my self esteem. I stopped talking to my friends because I felt that everyone hated me while saying they liked me like my ex and that they wanted me to go and stop bothering them with my existence like my ex while telling me they like me and want me around. Woe is me. I feel too messed up to go to a therapist because I have too many problems but I can't really cope with life. So now I'm just writing this in a random RU-vid video and no one will read this comment but hey at least I got my feelings out.
When I get anxiety attacks, one of the things that crosses my mind is “Are you making yourself feel this way so that you can say you have anxiety?” It’s such a horrible feeling. It makes me feel empty and fake. Edit: Your feelings are valid. It doesn’t matter if you haven’t been diagnosed by a professional, you have the right to feel what you’re feeling.
Dude, that's not what the title is referring to, the person who made the video has both of these problems as well, but she's trying to help others pinpoint whether or not a CERTAIN situation that happened to you, was because of social anxiety, or whether it was introversion.
@@nununana2596 I feel you. A former crush liked me back and I was going to do a promise I kept for him (its too embarrassing to even mention online) but because I was so afraid of the fact that he might be mad at me or too busy to make time for the promise Ive never been able to do it and now we're going to be in different schools now :< ANd now I feel so guilty that I made him wait for so long and so mad that I kept making excuses not to do it when he's done so much for me..
Me: "dad, I don’t know how I should introduce myself to others, I'm kinda nervous" My dad: "just don’t be shy..." Me: "mhm... yeah thanks, never heard that before." When someone says to an introverted person, or someone that has social anxiety, something like: "don’t be shy“, "just talk more" etc. Then it's like saying: "oh you can’t see ‚cause you are blind? *just see* "
That’s also the reason why I hate school. They treat ppl that are introverts or ppl that have anxiety like someone who can’t work right. Like, why do I have to speak to my whole class if I am really scared of it and it makes me feel really uncomfortable? That’s so dumb. Why do i have to pretend like an extrovert just to have better grades. They keep telling me that I have to speak more in class. And I’m really trying but it’s still not enough for them. That stresses me so much. I love learning new things but the social part makes me hate school and I don’t want to go there anymore.
This happened to me!! I was practicing what I would do if someone said something to me and someone approached me and asked a simple question. Me: *ignores* them: “hello?” Me: “huh?😳” them: *ask question again* me: stutters a lot for no reason* “I- u-uhhhhh t-the um” my cousin with a actually stuttering problem: I-it’s right there 😐👉 *points* them: “thanks” me: *zones out* my mind: *OH MY GOD YOUR SO EMBARRASSING YOU PRACTICED THIS!! 😭😭😭*
recently happened to me. there was something so simple that i wanted to ask to someone close to me and i just completely froze up about it, even though i got a little confident over being able to ask if they could help out with something that wouldn’t take that long and is something a little obvious. man social anxiety is truly the worse sometimes, especially because i know that it’s bad and not normal to think like this 🤡
Experienced this before but, the time when you're having a silent anxiety attack and you start to think "Am I only behaving like this for me to say that I have social anxiety and attention?" Makes the situation worse😀
Oh em gee.....yes. I tell myself that I have to just be faking it all the time because I want attention. I'm not sick, I'm just faking it. Like I don't even believe my own stupid self. (I have several mental illness diagnosis).
They're probably not gonna believe it since they're going to say your already lucky and privilege,your just trying to act and fake it, that's why people hide things, people do not believe it unless it's too late,the social anxiety already cause depression and paranoia
Me when Im alone: I wish people would pay attention to me :(. Me in a social situation: AAAAAAAHHH oh no ohno oh no what do I do ohno dont look at meplease look at someone else
Me when I’m alone: I wish someone would talk to me Me when I’m in my group of friends: They’re making fun of me and shipping me with my crush, but still put me down in her presence Me when I’m on my way home with classmates (which I don’t do often because of this reason): No one talks to me everyone chooses their phone and social media over talking to me (There’s only one person who doesn’t... my crush)
Hahaahahah because of your algorithm and things that you write on the internet + your openness on google or other search engine platforms are being analysed and heard . Our parents barely hear us though
Talking on the internet is the best form of communication. Discussions often only go as far as your willing to go and you can usually take your time thinking through what you want to say. Plus you can't feel the other persons eyes staring into your soul while they await your response to a typically simple question that should not feel like your answer will make or break your entire relationship.
Keren Ray and I'm one of those people. I did not realise that! Forgive me for being rude, but how exactly does that work? Sorry, just dumb and curious 😂
@@dragonfire8873 when I'm in control of a social situation, I'll talk to anyone, and I prefer to be with other people then by myself, but I'm always over thinking everything, and when certain things happen I can get really anxious real fast. I hoped this helped!
I get so scared when someone stares at me when I go out. I feel like they are judging the way I walk or the way I look and every single detail. I know they are probably not but the fear has been there since I was little. I have talked about this with my mom and she says it will stop if stop caring about what they say but it's not that easy. I also get super red whenever I talk to somebody and my hands start sweating a lot. I'm super akward
I am 100% like this too. Looking like a damn sweaty tomato close to tears when the teacher makes me answer questions in front of the class. I’m seriously awkward. I have siblings who could care less about what people think of them and so do my parents so they all just tell me I’m overthinking. NO SHIT SHERLOCK I KNOW IM OVERTHINKING THATS MY ISSUE!!!
If I have to go out like buy food or materials I will have to spend like half an hour with my heart pounding to prepare myself to be seen at broad daylight or peep at the window to see if there's no people nearby before going out. It usually ends up me not going and reschedule it in the night or the day after.
Yes! Or I buy other things that I completely don't need just so that the cashier doesn't judge me for what I'm buying. And I have to beg someone to go to the store with me, bc standing face to face with a cashier makes me feel anxious. And many more.
i'm so jealous of everybody else, they find making friends so easy. some girls will just walk up to me in school, talk to me, and call me their bff. they have huge friend groups, and are even dating. then there's me, so afraid of being judged, one friend, and kind of "acquainted" with other people. but i honestly am so fucking scared of being with people. edit: ik this is kind of annoying but- 2.2 k likes? oh my god i've never gotten that much thank you so much!!
While what everyone here said is true, the thing for some people is that they can't do it with just a simple video or pep talk. Plus theres also the image you've made of yourself at school/ work, if you wait to long it becomes nearly immposible to try and 'fix' your anxiety, that was likely built up over time and hard to break down
well then its me (btw im a girl xd) i have a short time in my new school but i remember that when i first enter to be so scared i wanted to cry,then,i became more introverted when we are not doing anything i just feel so sad because i dont have any friends (well i have but i dont really feel ok),for being alone and im very scared of things like answering or even stand up from my chair,when i always feel fear i cry on the bathroom,but i stand up and try to live and to improve thanks to read (i dont have anyone to tell this)
I just think they're people too with flaws and they poop like I do. And thinking that helps to remember that they're at my level too, and I don't worry about others judging my weirdness.
I remember when I was 6 years old and one girl who was older ask me: "Why don´t you talk?" I remember clearly how my heart rate went up, I felt so scared at the moment. Finally, I gathered all the courage I had just to say "It scares me..."
Man these comments really make me feel more comfortable, knowing there are more people here like me, also i wish i was invited places, or messaged. I can go days wtout getting a single "whats up" or anything
same, my friends always ask me why i am so terrified of talking with other people, i feel better for knowing there are more people like this, even though no one deserves it
I frequently need to spend time by myself and feel tired after being around others. but when I am out especially alone I’m always worrying about people judging me or thinking I’m crazy or annoying.
My anxiety after a good time with my friends: Anxiety: They definitely _hate you_ and think _you are weird_ Me: But why? Give a more logic explanation Anxiety: because you talk too much/too little Me: But... when our best friend does it, it’s normal... she’s really nice actually Anxiety: YeEEEeeaaAAAh BUT IS WEIRD WHEN _YOU_ DO IT
I was at a Sunday school meeting, and the teacher told us to introduce ourselves. She pointed at the person infront of me (but I didn’t see because my vision isn’t the best) and everyone looked at me so I stood up and walked to the front. The teacher was still talking to the person infront of me and i was stand at the front confused. The class then laughed and said that I wasn’t suppose to go but let me anyways. Lemme tell you I had the worst panic attack and couldn’t breath, I couldn’t even talk properly when introducing myself. I felt like crying and you could hear it in my voice. When I was done I sat down put my hood on and didn’t talk the whole class like I usually do. I never went back again.
Yeah, it's embarrassing and makes you not want to speak and when you're trying to wipe away tears because you feel so embarrassed and then your just left feeling terrible and longing to go home.
Don’t be too hard on yourself man. Similar thing happened to me. Be strong. Even presidents have embarrassing moments but don’t let it get to you and carry on 💪
Psych2Go well it’s like a “I don’t want the guys but they’re kind of a package deal” situation, so I’m gonna go with the social anxiety. Plus it’s what I’m used to soooo-
This may sound strange but whenever I go to school I can go a whole 6 hours without saying a single word if the teacher calls on me my heart always sinks immediately I sometimes stutter and other times I say the quickest response right or wrong just to get out of the situation, There's three people that I can properly socialise with because I've know them for so long (Two are my family and the other my mum's friend) but socialising with people in general scares me I always say "I need friends" but then when it comes to making them I'm a complete cowered I over analyse everything and it's gotten to the point where a single "Hello" scares me...
I try to answer as quickly as possible too. When I answer wrong, I'm humiliated in front of my class and walked through the question like a baby. Teachers are literally the worst people I've ever met smh
This hits hard when you're starting to lose touch with your friends that were special to you because you're picky on who to be friends with since you're also an introvert
Why does it feel like it's deeper tho. Like, I'm not afraid of people, I just don't want to hurt them or their feelings. If I'm not worrying abt that, I overthink if I'm being clingy or annoying or dumb or weird. It's like someone's always watching and judging no matter what I do. As long as I'm in a social setting or public in general, it's like the judgement never ends. And don't even get me started on thinking abt how you made someone feel or how you hid your feelings or how you came off in conversations hours and even days ago.
I can’t even say Merry Christmas to someone without thinking that they’ll judge my voice or something (My voice has always been high pitched). I just overthink about everything related to socializing.
Oh my god me too I was at chirstmas party and there was a bunch of people I didn't know, like friends of my parents and I just wanted to disappear because I felt like I needed to be this specific person around them... in truth I don't really know who I am. :/
Ahahah this is literally me. I didn’t know other people worried about this. Basically any sort of like.. congratulatory sentence makes me feel uncomfortable, merry Christmas, happy holidays, happy birthday, I feel awkward saying it, overthink my tone of voice or if I sound genuine enough, etc...
Elena Boycheva and receiving the message is a problem for me too because I never know how to respond. I’ll then go home and think about how I responded to what the person said (like Merry Christmas, good job, or even hey/hi/sup. Sup is the absolute worst bc I never know how to respond to it :/) and think, “wow that was so stupid I should have said something else” and cringe for the rest of eternity whenever I think about what I said, even if it was a perfectly normal response. Like, I could say something to someone today and still be cringing about it next week, even if it’s completely irrelevant and trivial. It’s a problem.
Things I struggle with due to social anxiety: 1) Wearing my own clothes, especially in school. In England we have school uniforms, so non-school uniform days are always nerve wracking. ‘What if it’s the wrong day’ ‘Are my clothes weird?’ But when I forget I also freak out. 2) Buying things at the store, or even going to the store. I get scared I will buy something and get judged for it, I get scared I’ll lose something, I get scared of being followed around the store, I get scared of seeing someone I know etc etc.. 3) Ordering food at fast food restaurants. I tend to edit my meals as I don’t like most of the stuff in it, so when I’m with other people I either just order a drink, or get the same thing they get even if I don’t like it and just force myself and pretend I like it. At restaurants I also tend to poke the person next to me, tell them what I want and beg them to order it for me. 4) Meeting up with my friends at the mall. I’ve been asked so many times to go to the mall with my friends. Hell no. I get scared I’ll get lost/they’ll take me somewhere unfamiliar, we’ll stay out too long, I’ll lose them, I won’t be able to make my way home etc. 5) Getting on buses. Every time I try and get on a bus, even with someone else, i worry so much that I always mess it up. I also get scared of someone sitting next to me that I don’t know and trying to talk with me. Please go away.. There are so so many more I can list, so if you’re interested in more just ask and I can list a few more, but just know for you with out social anxiety, how much it really does affect people’s daily life. If your friend always turns down your invitation to go places, don’t be scared that it’s because they don’t like you, there’s a really big chance they are too scared. Instead, perhaps invite them to your house, or ask to go round their house. You still spend quality time together, in a place you both can feel comfortable. 💕
i’m personally terrified to call and make the appointment (i have to do it myself since i’m 18 now). even then i may not like the therapist !! it’s ironic the reason i need therapy is the reason i’m scared to go LMFAO. hope that made sense
I always thought I was shy because people told me that, I was quiet and never had many friends. But as I grew older I understood that I was scared of socializing and it was so hard for me to do anything, I could even go to the store like wth I'm still struggling with that but when I entered college I had to start doing something about it. I'm still socially awkward and a complete loner and all of that but I've manage to do things that before I wouldn't even think on doing :)
I understand, I'm the same way too. Even I have social anxiety and still try to do things that may not be comfortable, even when is worth passing out for. 😅
Hi same! I joined one club in university. Went on a day trip. Working as a volunteer in retail and for the vision-impaired. And I finally got a casual job as a tutor even if I only have one student. I can also finally grocery shop by myself (self-serve checkout ftw) and I've gotten better at handling calls.
It made me cry too... Mainly because I don't know if I have social anxiety or if I'm just overreacting, but I keep telling myself that I'm just overreacting because I haven't been diagnosed and I'm just so confused and scared...
Having social anxiety is like having multiple choices on how to deliver a sentence and predicting the type of outcome it will get. Theeen you just decide to say nothing.
I have to mentally prepare before I can ask the staff in a shop if they have something that I need. I need more than a half hour to make a phonecall to strangers....etc. etc. I could puke every time I have to stay up and go to work in the mornig because I want to work as a teacher and have to overcome my greatest fears for it every day. It is so hard. But every morning it gets a little bit better. Maybe sometime I am not afraid anymore.
Making phone calls is the worst. Especially when nobody picks up and I have to leave a barely coherent message. Then I get to worry about how stupid I sounded for the rest of the day.
I've mostly set up my whole life to avoid having to use the phone. I can just about text, but phoning anybody other than my husband is very challenging. On the getting better - it can. I was agoraphobic as a teenager. and while the immediate thought of avoiding going outside has never fully gone away, I can control it now, and get on top of it. I sometimes describe it as a little like being an addict - you have to keep on it every day. Occasionally you might have a small relapse, but you get back on it again.
I’m an introvert with social anxiety, and its hard because I’m more prone to wanting to stay home, and being ok with it. I feel so much better when I’m completely alone. But I’m afraid this will lead me to becoming a hermit. Sometimes I think I want to be. I want to stay home forever, and I never want to talk to anyone again. But I know deep down that’s not what I truly want. I want to be alone, but not lonely. I care about my friends and family, and I want to do things with them. I want to go out and experience things, but I’m usually too scared to try, and when I actually do its very exhausting. With that said, I think social anxiety is just as hard for extroverts. They feel the best around people, but they are too scared to interact. They desperately want and need to be around others, but sometimes they are too scared to leave their house, or even talk to people. Anxiety sucks >:(
Toby TheKiller Something my big brother talk to me about, about one week ago... because I opened up to him... we had like a 2 hour discussion about our problems and he explained to me while he doesn’t fully understand my situation that he understands feeling lonely and feeling like you’re missing out on girlfriends, fun activities etc... and he told me all I could do is just not let social anxiety control me and that with time and a positive Attitude is the best I could do At first I was thinking “he just gave me the usual be positive don’t worry youre fine” advice but I really thought about it And then he said when you wake up the next morning Tell yourself: “I am in control of social anxiety, not the other way around” In which I did, after doing so it’s been about a week and I have improved a lot it’s crazy to realize simply minipulating your mind to think that social anxiety does not control you and that you have full control over it and when it needs to act up helps a fuck ton I’ve already lost a few symptoms such as I always had a eye contact problem and felt judged while walking by people and having someone in my peripheral vision But I started saying “I am in control” and for the first day it didn’t work immediately but I kept saying it over and over meaning it everytime and I felt immediate results, I was able to concentrate on things other than my eye contact, was able to feel safe and comfortable around people, and i just couldn’t stop laughing and feeling good through the the day... I’m one week in and the eye contact problem is almost completely gone, I’ve also learned to control my body movement, from saying “I am in control “....I don’t wave my arms around awkwardly trying to calm my nervousness The milisecond I feel some negative or bad/ nervous thoughts Literally I’m talking immediately as I feel those thoughts coming while approaching some sorrow social interaction such as going to the bathroom at school or getting a tissue in front of the class I say “I am in control of social anxiety” I even cuss at social anxiety as if it was a person I’ll go as far to act as if I’m fucking punching the shit out of it and curb stomping its teeth in because it’s not bossing me or controlling me around soon And this has really helped me DONT BE A VICTIM TO YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES this is the most important lesson I’ve learned recently You don’t need meds you don’t need treatment Just simply realize you are in control Dont get any doubts BECUASE YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF SOCIAL ANXIETY Tell it to go away and never come back YOU are the boss of it now enjoy life and kick back , this is coming from a 16 year old almost 17 year old who has dealt with the bullshit since about 7 years old
Sometimes I feel suffocated for having social anxiety and how it hold me back from anything. Sending texts in a group chat, being in the center of attention, gatherings, etc. I feel suffocated because its like I don't fit in, and I'm worried it will cause problems for me in my professional life. On the internet I see a lot of people like me. Where are you guys in my real life?!! Why all i see are happy and self confident people?
Defominvous I couldn’t relate anymore to this. When I go out everyone looks like they are having a great time. Don’t let it bother you about your professional career because you can always work from home. There are tons of ways to make money from home. I currently work from home and love it. I don’t have to talk to anybody and it is perfect!
I remember the phrase that helped me to cope with social anxiety having convos with people - “You are not the clown to entertain them”! 👌 besides think how little or none we actually think of others but ourselves. Switch the focus, care about your well-being (for example say “I’m going to this party for MYSELF” etc)
I always feel nauseous on the first day of school. Like I’ll tremble just by entering the school bus and making a fool of myself by just taking a seat. And introducing ourselves? Why bother if I’m not going to talk with anyone in class. Wearing my earbuds at lunch somewhat eases me. I’ll just buy a bag of chips and scroll through my phone to make it seem that I’m intrigued with what I’m looking at. Okay I’m going to stop now.
First day of school makes me have anxiety, not about ppl anymore, what if i go to the wrong classroom? What if im late and they make fun of me? What if I go in the wrong school door? What if Its not my group? Am i in the right group? Why arent they saying my name yet, am i not on the list?
Have you ever talked excitedly to a friend about a topic you’re interesting and then slowly realize they’re not interested in it nearly as much as you or at all so you gradually stop talking?
Anyone else have uncontrollable smiling when you're forced to talk to someone? I get it some days really badly but other days im fine for the most part.
Rave I do, I also laugh uncontrollably too, like I can’t help it, because laughing or smiling helps me calm down because my whole body is so tense you have no idea lol 😂
Avanitia ikr, like it makes me calm down, but if I do smile or laugh then the person who I’m talking too like gets a more serious look on their face and it’s like ughhhhhh u dontttt unddderrrstandndddd
@@pitemsmilk, My friend has severe anxiety, worser than mine. Once in class we were going around tables and one of my other friends (an extrovert) decided that she would read it to help her, but it wasn’t in the right direction. When Mrs came to our table she was mumbling so I overtook it for her, but damn I was so anxious 😭 I’m glad I could help my friend though
*you're not alone* i used to be a socially anxious extrovert but have been healing myself for a while. i can proudly say that i'm a normal extrovert again, but it wasn't easy! don't be hard on yourself for being human, and if you want to heal, don't force yourself to take big steps ❤️❤️
Oh hey, one of my only friends sent me a message... But it was sent a while ago. It would just be awkward to send something now. They may not want to talk to me right now. Oh god, they probably hate me because I took so long to reply. Oh god, oh Geez.
imo better to reply and just say “sorry i was busy (or doing something specific like studying)” and then answer their text everyone is busy and some don’t check their phones or messages for days if i sent someone a message i’m very patient, i’m ok if they answer it a week later, just as long as they don’t leave me on read for years; that’ll mean they just don’t care or too busy to message me which i understand tho
ive got problems with texting, talking, pleasing people, etc. i act differently per social scenario like most people, but it always makes me feel guilty/act in a way that i don’t like. ill be louder around people i don’t know or like to gain their attention or make a good impression. ill be sullen and angry and experience a lot of mood shifts with my family. ill be flirty and bubbly with people im friends with. problem is, that isn’t me. well, im not really sure who i am tbh. i partake in a lot of behaviours to get out of my thoughts, bc they’re always mocking me. at night i get into physical conversations of me putting myself down, for hours at a time, just arguing with myself about why im a horrible person and essentially getting that same treatment back. i laugh and fill the silence when im uncomfortable, or even when im not uncomfortable, but just anxious or doing something im ashamed of. like reading comics; my emotions are always amplified during that time bc i always feel so stupid despite knowing that nobody is here with me. i like being alone and i can’t text, call, or email. i overthink to the point of crying sometimes, or my responses are clipped, never genuine unless it’s late at night when my emotions are typically looser or i know the intent. likely something to do with me not being able to see body language. im generally pretty anxious/uncomfortable, even in places where i know im in my element. it’s not uncommon for people to tel me i look terrified, scared, or nervous when im at my workplace or at sports practice, even though i enjoy being there and feel comfortable. part of my need to please others, or my heightened emotions bleeding into an anxious energy that keeps me moving? i don’t know. i can never sit still and when i get my heart rate up, my thoughts get louder, except when im at the gym. it’s almost impossible for me to maintain willpower bc my thoughts are always screaming at me to stop. it’s hard to do much tbh, and even in social situation where im in my element, i often regret and overthink myself afterwards or even during the moment. it sucks, and ive got a habit of turning to my self-loathing voice whenever im alone or not socializing, so that only amplifies it. simply put, i doubt i have social anxiety. i don’t know why im here, honestly. i only know that being alone, while preferable, makes me feel like shit and only by doing things constantly do i get out of my own head/thoughts, like socializing, though i always feel like shit afterwards. i think im just emotionally stunted or didn’t pick things up. my younger self was a mess, which is clear for me to see, and i think a lot of that has to do with me not having a social background. ive learned most of my social skills from books and by emulating those around me, to the point where i don’t know who my genuine self is. quarantine has led to me staying up more, which means more self-loathing debates, wild bursts of anxious energy, and mad giggling/flailing/humming or noise making to alleviate that. ive looked into female autism and adhd, but im not sure anymore, and i can’t exactly get a diagnoses either. so it sucks. idk why im here. ive found that it’s so much easier to talk to the void of youtube comments instead of taking to people i know or want to gain the respect of. talking to my friends that im not super close to, or talki NV to teachers, or even talking to close friends, is a chore and it’s incredibly stressful, but this is somehow okay. makes sense for a lot of people tho. anyway, this had very little to do with the video and was primarily me ranting about symptoms that most people generally encompass, and trying to connect dots so that i can potentially help myself/understand myself. it’s not helping. i had to change my channel name which is great bc i don’t want anybody finding this. aight. Gotta go. bye, good luck on your mental health journeys ya’ll
I know everone's journey is their own, and that nobody can judge us but ourselves... But for what little it's worth, I think saying this and putting it out there makes you SPECTACULARLY brave. Keep talking. Maybe to the void, maybe to yourself. Try not to be as hard on yourself as you previously were and focus on the positives. And if you don't know what those positives are, make a concious effort. Go back down Memory Lane as detailed as you can. You've done something good at some point. Hold on to that. You are MUCH MORE than your faults or insecurities. You just have to learn to accept that... I hope you find what you're looking for. I personally think you've taken the first step already...
I can feel so much what you're saying, it's the same in many ways for me too I just wanted to make sure you know you're not alone and that I feel the same So good luck with everything, be brave and much love
are you.... me? im a transwoman with tourettes, adhd ocd & autism but... its like youre describing exactly the parts of how this video fails to describe me. im 6 foot tall and my tourettes has a symptom thats not exactly uncommon called Sudden Explosive Rage (read *6. ‘RAGE’* on this page: tourette.org/resource/understanding-behavioral-symptoms-tourette-syndrome/ ) and the way it leads me to act... well, i mean, thats the problem really... is it me? is it this disorder i was born with, with no choice in the matter? or... is there really a difference that matters, considering the things i do and have done. i might as well qualify for being locked in highsecurity prison... and yet so many of the friends ive pushed away/lost say that they dont like me simply because i apologize way too intensely & way too much, constantly interpreting/assuminh their actions to be an indication that they were offended by my actions, when im really just overly-reading-into/getting-offended-by THEIR actions as being indications that i fricked-up really bad. do u think we have something similar? if so, what do u think it is? if not, sorry if im being creepy... i might just be assuming connections between myself & someone else’s life again. is there a cure/treatment/therapy/medication? ive tried everything; my mom & dad have spared no expense trying to help me. i feel like i.... i must be too lazy.... but then i think back to what ive been thru & what happens everytime i actually try something new and wonder if my lack of hope is justified... or if im only suspecting tjat to justify more laziness!!! i dont want to be like this anymore. i wish i could replace my mind with someone else’s, or make myself 10x weaker so i dont pose a threat
As an introvert, I don’t feel anxiety or any other negative things while talking to people. I can talk easily to stranger and even be funny sometimes, but I prefer spending time alone, that’s all. I just think « Maybe I am a weirdo, but if they don’t like me, screw it, they just have to find someone else. » I didn’t have any bf or gf cuz I just didn’t look for it and that’s not one of my main objective. Please, if you have one or several symptoms from up here, go find someone that can help you. You aren’t having a healthy life.
Atownic Pepperoni thank you for your input. i’ve always been blaming these issues on my introversion because i don’t know what it’s like for another introvert or another person with social anxiety.
damn this is eye opening haha. I thought everything was normal until just a couple months ago. recently my bf pointed out that the quickened breathing, heart rate, etc I experience are panic attacks and not just “being slightly worried about an event like anyone else does.” it’s super strange to find out this isn’t just.. something everyone does.
Same, especially with the relationship with bf/gf. Only difference is that I cant suddenly talk to strangers. Not even if I want to ask an older person if they want my seat
Yup I definitely have social anxiety 😕 I was kinda questioning it but i over think before things happen like for ex: we are walking in the store by myself and I start to break a sweat like “I prolly look like an idiot”, “why do ppl always stare when others walk by jeez?!”, “omg!! did I bring the card oh no oh no wait I got it!” “what are we getting again oh yeah let’s hurry up before the line gets long and ppl stand behind me *sees people in front of me and people trying to get behind me in line* I can wait a bit” “😓 I really don’t want to wait In Line with these ppl but moms gonna get mad I’m taking so long and more people are coming in the store! I wanna leave so bad” and then my heart starts beating hard in my chest to the point I can hear it and feel it and see it and I’m sweating buckets my ears are read and I’m blushing like crazy thing about how dumb I look red sweating and dressed like a bum (bc I have no sense of style) wishing I just stayed home thinking back it seems so scary but when I explain to people it seems to them like I’m lazy and don’t wanna leave my house, my mom laughed at me when I got back in the car and after I went through something like that she asked me to go in and by soda and I cried and begged her not to make me go and she yelled at me for being lazy and dramatic but I was more scared of going inside then hearing her yell at me and call me lazy dumb and dramatic
Damn i did that I couldn’t handle lot my friends in one room i feel anxious af but i really love em i grow up with em but this social anxiety is killin me i think i will end up just alone
y'all, check their playlists. you'll come across a few that have a few thousand views. those are the unlisted ones, and they're there before they're released to the public.
I’ve always classified myself as an introvert but secretly thought I had social anxiety. After watching this I’m almost 100% sure I have social anxiety, I think along with other anxiety disorders. But I feel like I’m always afraid and embarrassed to tell my doctor about everything I’m struggling with and they can’t properly diagnose me.
Finally found one! Good for you! To heal you first have to be honest with yourself. No more BS! It doesn’t do you any good pretending you don’t have a problem. Ain’t no shame in admitting your flaws.
@@KnotAnOwl not gonna lie that’s some shit that comes to my mind. But if your worried about those things I wouldn’t be surprised if you had anxiety. Sometimes you just have to go for it because if you do have it you can get help.
@@KnotAnOwl I mean if you break your leg you need medical attention. Why should we treat mental disorders any differently? If you need help then you need help. There shouldn’t be any shame in asking for help. Humans are biologically programmed to be selfish but we’ve evolved to also feel love which is displayed when someone offers help to someone in need without the expectation of receiving anything in return. Plus you can’t know until you’re diagnosed. Getting a diagnosis is a form of getting help. I have a hunch that OP does actually have social anxiety. The keyword in his comment was “secretly”. Lots of people are shamed for their social anxiety and so they feel vulnerable admitting that they have it just like I did. I didn’t start healing until I stopped excusing my social isolation for introversion. I didn’t start healing until I confronted my fear through exposure therapy. I became a cashier and It’s insane how much it’s helped. Although now I face a new disorder…..AVPD.
@@Psych2go I think extroverts with social phobia can easily get more deprived of human contact than their introverted counterparts, which in turn makes them more prone to panic attacks when in solitude. Maybe the two-sided hell puts them on the spot and makes them try and alter their personality by force, which might also be detrimental. I'm not educated enough to really talk about such a serious topic though, I'm just trying to figure out what's wrong with me.
You have summed up my recent life in a way I was trying to but couldn't. My whole life I've been an extrovert and ever since I started university I have developed habits of someone with social anxiety. For me, the concern of people liking me and thinking I'm cool invades my conscious behavior in social settings and has made me 'try' to socialize well when before it came naturally. I'm not used to it. I get impostor syndrome, like I've forgotten even who I'm supposed to be. "Why is this so hard? It never used to be...maybe I'm not really an extrovert?" No. I am, but I have developed social anxiety. It's definitely a big lifestyle change I now have to make to mitigate it, one which wouldn't be as large for an introvert. But I think this happens to a lot of people, in fact one might say it is the human condition; when we grow up and become self-aware of our thinking and actions, we must relearn how we used to behave because we never did it consciously before. The new mental environment you find yourself in, now questioning every action you decide to perform, is what generates anxiety in adults.
Interesting point. Personally, I feel socially anxious most times but would also consider myself to be an introvert, and it's hell. The "pre-existing" friends I have don't really hang out with me or keep in touch, and my anxiety completely stops me from forming any new friendships, thus leaving me in constant isolation. As a kid I could spend days on my own and always find joy in being alone, but now that I'm older I just feel socially deprived. People seem to think that I _choose_ to be alone because it's more comfortable for me, but the reality is I'm always alone because I don't have anyone to spend time with, even though I want to.
Me: Writes E-mail so I don’t have to call. Them: Reply with a phone number telling me to call them. Me: Prepares mentally for 30 minutes, calls them, stutters while speaking way too fast for the other end to understand me, hangs up and still shames myself for my incompetence a year later. Also, if I should ever live alone I’d probably starve because shopping is just way too much for me xD. I don’t know why but I’m somehow afraid of it. Can anyone relate?
I. 31 and I'm still scared to go into a store alone. It's better with my gf but it's still horrible. Everyone is staring at me and i just look towards the wall or down. Fukkk
I always thought that I was an introverted anti social because that's what everyone always told me but, recently I realized that I've had social anxiety this whole time. i'm scared to ask someone back for something when they borrow things from me. I get nervous when I hear the word group work. I don't have friends because i'm scared of going up to them and them making fun of me. I hate asking questions and I hate parties. i'm considering telling my parents but they just won't understand.
I had selective mutism (it is severe social anxiety). When i started school, i didn't talk at all at school for years... Now, i'm in highschool and i talk but still have social anxiety. I really hate group work too, but i've learned that it's trough experiences you learn how to socialize, so i try to talk even though i really don't want to. I also do meditation and it really helps.
I am going through the same situation right and i lost my job and trying for another job makes me go crazy and just like you said my family wont understand me i feel like running away or end my life right now
D10S 10 please. don’t. do. that!! Maybe try find something you can find comfort in or reduce the stress in some kinda way. May sound stupid or you already tried everything or idk, but please don’t end your life, theres light at the end of the tunnel and when youre at the bottom rn, the only way you can go is up! I hope the best for you and sending all my prayers your way. You got this!
I'm crying rn i feel so understood. social anxiety is so uncomfortable for me and it's caused by my own family. i want to improve, enjoy, forget about the trauma my family has caused me. i need help how do i get help I'm from a third world country and I don't know how to ask for professional help, and i also can't afford it! I want to get better
Try not to think too much about it.... you're just as qualified as anyone else to do anything that they want to do, no one is better than you, you're not better than anyone, so dear, just live your life and forget people. I know it's hard, I struggle with it too but you'll be okay, I know you will
You're not alone. I'm also here because I'm going through the same stuff as you, trying to find ways to overcome social anxiety without professional therapy. I found out from this video that I'm not an introvert but I have social anxiety. I've been trying to improve myself by going out for a run to practice saying "hello" or smiling at someone random with eye contact. It was very hard to do but when I managed to do it, it gave me more confidence to do it again. I also try to keep in mind that I never know when I'm going to die, I could die tomorrow so why would I spend the last time of my life negatively? Say hello or meet as many people as I can because I might not see them ever again, and they are more likely to treat you nice than you've imagined
1) You are turning down to social events because it scares you ------->2:05 2) You aren't enjoying the introverted activities anymore -------> 3:17 3) You are not doing necessary things anymore -------> 4:09 4) You don't enjoy the social activities that you used to -------> 5:05 5) You don't maintain relationships as well you used to -------> 6:06 (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤
