I am a man approaching 30, and have just had my very first child, a son. You're exactly right, it isn't about my wife and I anymore, it's about our little one., and it is an amazing feeling. Thank you for the great videos, keep up the great work, Ash!
I will be 68 in September. I regularly go to the jym each morning at 7 am, 5 days aweek, run 40 minutes on the treadmill follow it up with 20 minutes of resistance weights. While im running working up a great sweat, I keep telling myself, "how lucky am I to be able to do this as my clock tick towards another milestone 68." I may sound booty, (nutty) but, being grateful, has made me a happier person. I see the world in a different light. Every single person i see on the street, I see them as a my companion. I found being in this frame of mine has enhanced my life and raised my consciousness to a higher level. Including many year's of deep soul searching to get here. And here i am. And here im staying. And i thank God for every single day.
Good for you. I'm 60 & use weights every morning, hike &, cycle every other day. I'm cycling Bilbao to Malaga in September, easy peasy. I can't recall which famous person said it, but it's so true.. "Nothing gives the illusion of youth more than a good physique". 👍
That was very well said, Ash. The view of the ocean can give me that Karma. I am unsure why since I am a landlubber, but it has a calming influence on me. I went to sea many years ago on a cargo ship from Cardiff to West Africa. I saw and experienced amazing things on the voyage that would fill a book. At sea, if you could look up at the sky in the dead of night, that sight would change you forever. You will be humbled. Complete darkness is absolute. The stars and our Galaxy are 3 dimensional. It was if you could reach up and grab a star! I will never forget that.
This is a great video and I've come to realize what Ash has alluded to and I'm 47. That said, I believe that "happiness" is a nebulous and elusive state. What humans seek, which they think is happiness, is in fact contentment. I've been running a long race and in the past 7 years I've come to realize it's with myself. Life is not a dress rehearsal.
Hi Ash, You are explaining „Schadenfreude“ perfectly. Except for the fact that most people in DE use it to describe the fact that they see the funny side of an otherwise bad failure. It is not about a joy of seeing someone else suffer. It is about seeing a bad situation through the lens of a Comedy Sketch. So, as I perceive and know it, we Germans see a reference to the black english humour, which many of us really appreciate 😂. All the best, Tim
As alluded to previously. The difference between happiness and contentment is similar to that between fashion and style - one is transient, the other lasts a lot longer. Also, health is wealth, which is what our grandparents focussed on in those pre-social security days.
Currently, I'm in my early 60s, and about 20 years ago, I realized that happiness is a tangential snap shot in time. So I learned to strive for peace, and I look at life through the equation PEACE = JOY + SORROW. Joy is found in many of the suggestions you often mention in your videos, and being grateful for having these things. Living in peace with yourself means to know what brings you joy, and being able to maintain that joy while you navigate the sorrows in life. This is most helpful as we age, and the sorrows tend to show up more frequently as we lose people.
Too many people put too much emphasis on being happy all the time, and if they’re not then something is wrong. The problem with that is that happiness is a fleeting thing, it comes and goes. Better to strive for a more measured approach between the peaks and troughs of happiness and misery. If you can say that you are content in life, with occasional peaks and not too many dips, then you are winning - and indeed in the long run you’ll look back and see your life as being basically happy. Family, hobbies, regular exercise and good health will help make this happen. Balance in all things.
Good reminder. We all instinctively know these points make us happy, but in my opinion, the reason they're elusive is because they're so difficult to implement. We start with great intentions only to soon confront our egos and they get the best of us. These guidelines you point out, need to be consistently and relentlessly practised.
Great minds think alike as I'm in agreement with everything you mentioned. I hope people out there who are unfulfilled and unhappy in their life will come around to learning these lessons.
Great channel and always great advice, I am coming up on 77 and I am still learning, always curious and I am looking for another 20 years and another 20 after that. Thank You!
I try to be positive. And thank you for this wonderful advice. You are right. I will say a few things that are hard to think about and weigh heavy on my mind. It is hard, when you see the pressure on the world to achieve "progress", "economic success"etc etc, but we do this at the expense of nature, this planet's resources, the climate.. we think the problem is global warming. But what about pollution in rivers and seas, over fishing, lack of trees and rewilding.. instead we all want progress, and more stuff, more flights abroad. What we need, I feel is a mindset shift, to live more in tune with this planet, like people of the past used to... I'm not entirely negative. I have hope but it's hard to keep up when you see how things are in this world 🌎 Let's hope that we find a way
Good man, Ash ! This is the best video I did not know I need to see today. Take care and stay healthy! By the way, a new top of perfumes would be appreciated.
Fantastic, 6 wonderful secrets to a happy and fulfilled life...the 7th secret would be happiness and a fulfilled life is not a hidden secret, all we need do is open the door and welcome it into our lives, thanks for sharing!
I have a good word for our German friends..."Queue". I'm not sure if they have a word for this, but, I'm sure they can come up with something....perhaps I'm just sore they battered us at the football....thanks for the video....very much enjoyed
Great advice, Ash albeit the smoke reminded me of a 1980s Gary Numan concert. Less is more. Buy cheap, buy twice. Enjoy solitude and also the company of strangers. Avoid mood hoovers. Love your cat and revisit interests when you become more time rich. Leave your comfort zone. Avoid social media.
Im a 3 out of 6 right now. Need to make more friends but see new people every weekend in the mountains. Talking of which my hobby sums up your metaphor perfectly. Currently 84 peaks into the Wainwrights challenge. Every one is a win
The key to a happy life is to make enough money to buy what you want, travel where you desire, wear all the watches you dream of, and eat what makes you happy. Cheers old chap!
Ash I am currently in the same career that you recently left and find I often see the negative in life situations all too often, which has led to difficulty in relationships where I often highlight pitfalls and risks of situations due to my expecting the worst. It is a good skill to have to weigh up risk, but I always have to remind myself to be more carefree.
I know what you mean. Since leaving my old profession, I have realsied a wonder to life that was suppressed by my job for decades. I hope your retirement looms soon sir.
I have often thought that one of the downsides of law enforcement is that you could, over time, develop a very cynical view of your community. In a typical day of a police officer’s day, they are interacting almost exclusively with the most negative aspects of their town. It would be very easy to start thinking that their community is a terrible place. I try to go out of my way to show gratitude to the police officers that I encounter.
Another great video with lots of insight! Thank you for sharing your wisdom and life experiences. Looks like true chap nirvana there at Camp Ash! Cheers!
Ash, Well said, I've always tried to be positive and during those difficult times I still try and stay positive. Also, I ask myself and others what is out there to do with themselves outside of work. You've given me some good suggestions.
Let me add a few things. 1) A broad social life is great, but it’s at least as important to have at least three or four deep lifelong friendships you can rely on. 2) You have a brain, so use it. A well educated man knows the classics, but don’t be a fuddy duddy. Keep up with current trends. 3) A good citizen learns all he can and takes the health of society seriously, but never let yourself get so obsessed with politics that your mental health and your ethical judgement suffer. However, the last several years, polarized as things are, have given me several opportunities for schadenfraude. I love seeing politicians I despise get indicted.
Wise words, Ash. Thanks! I was also the only guy in my book-club - although the ladies were about twenty years older.... Thoroughly enjoyed it, but had to stop as the books were mostly of bible-thickness and time was lacking
Nicely said - Live life as you please and enjoy the diverse moments ❤️ the comments were interesting as persons reflect their experiences & happiness on journeys - past and present 💝
Secrets of a happy life 😁 Always always where ever possible make sure you sleep with the wife's younger sister 😁 It works a treat ! 😂 keep it in the family 😂
I so enjoy all your videos, as a man with Scottish heritage, and desire to be a chap. I believe that joy and contentment are more important than happiness, which is based on circumstances in our lives. The only thing about you that makes me sad is that you appear to be either agnostic or atheist, though I hope it’s only so as not to alienate some of your followers.
I certainly will take modern medicine. I probably would be dead but for it. I remember my paternal grandmother, born in the 1890's, simply wearing out in her early seventies and dying. I just turned 81 and plan to be around a good bit longer. There is an old spiritual principle that says to live in the here and now. That is my objection to cell phones. Those glued to them are living elsewhere. Taking a child for a walk and glued to the phone, missing the joy of being outside with the wonder of a child (or a dog or whatever). Always elsewhere. As to the wonderful past, I have no neighbors dying of typhoid or diphtheria. Yes, we have problems, but so has every generation. I'll live with today's extended health and vigor.
Sadly nowadays happiness is connected with financial wealth. In Germany they don't say froehlich but glücklich which means lucky. All about luck and money. But wealth can be exactly the reason for unhappiness. Look at the richest people in the world. Money aplenty yet divorced and live in their own world in their own circles with fear to mingle among the populace. They have no freedom but full of fear to be kidnapped or lose their money. Freedom, not being rich, is a big step towards happiness. If you don't own anything expensive then nobody can take anything away from you that's peace. Freedom and peace nears you to happiness. 2 big things among others.
Objectively, our lives are worse than before. Disruptive, decentering change is rapid and ongoing. By burning fossil fuels we are permanently and irreversibly harming the life support systems we need to survive and heating is not presently controlled. The natural world is going through mass extinctions, another irreversible harming of the our natural capital. We should be anxious and worried about this. Only a fool would not be. The key is to use it as the motivation for action, not as a recipe for despair and defeatism and sadness.
I'm over 60 and only have a handful of friends, which I've known for decades. That's plenty enough for me. I don't feel happy in large groups. There's a huge difference between happy solitude and loneliness. Don't feel obliged to meet tons of new "friends" (are they, really? Or are there just fleeting acquaintances?) if you don't feel a void in that aspect of your life. We are herd animals, but there are some happy lone wolves around, everywhere.
I felt that way for many years, now in hindsight, I realise I said the same things as you have quoted here as a self protection mechanism. I love solitude, but I also revel in the company of others. When push comes to the shove, it is the man with friends who survives.
@@TheChapsGuide It could very well be a definition or language issue. Since you spent time in Germany, you are probably aware that the word "Freund" can't be simply translated to "friend". It runs deeper. It's not some old lady (or young gentleman, doesn't matter) you met and talked to at a book club (or any association) a couple of times.
Dear Ash, what a marvellous video. Thank you! First time heard this sentence „Love yourself and it doesn‘t matter to whom you are married“- but after the first laugh and reflecting about it, I made this to the mantra of my live. If you rest in your very existence and try to make yourself comfortable with the simple things of life as enjoying a hike through nature (or buying a nice watch), you are much more capable of also caring about the wellbeing of others. As you said- if you permanently look and fear the downsights of life, it is almost impossible to focus on something good.
We're hardwired to live together and to help and love each other. Reciprocal altruism/group natural selection are scientific terms that are used. Essentially, evolution has shaped our consciousness this way. Survival of the fittest is only half the story.
If you go back more than a couple of generations, people were concerned about their faith, not just "putting food on the table". Look at all the church buildings they left us, for goodness sake.
@@iio58 That is rather a sweeping statement about a younger generation. I have 4 children and I can assure you that none of them feel entitled, and none of them think that the world revolves around them.
