Psych2Go You guys are great I learn a lot here 1 question ... What causes addiction Because I've always thought it was either by being depressed or lonely that causes people to take up drinking or drugs Thanks in advance by the way
@@eddiesfuture9818 same here my parents use to tell me that we where so expensive, that if he didn't have to feed us he would be driving a more luxurious car and so on.
@@eddiesfuture9818 don't let that destroy your dreams, just because your parents are toxic doesnt mean you Will be toxic with your childrens, don't commit their mistakes
My parents weren't as toxic as some people are but my family was very dysfunctional for many reasons and because of this I'm still dealing with consequences.
Some children only had to deal with some "emotional abuse" and are told how dangerous it is, and that they may have PTSD. The thing about abusive families is that even when it is obvious abuse (physical, emotional) they try to convince you that you are over reacting, and that YOU are the abuser for "playing the victim" and folding. I've spent majority of my life being told that I should just accept that I'm afraid that someone I love will hurt me, both physically and emotionally, and that it is not abuse, no way could there be any long term side effects, ESPECIALLY not ptsd.
Doris Lau lol meh parents don't give a damn about my feelings, too religious. They get mad when I talk about suicide saying you'll go to hell, I bet they don't even care about me just all that
milkywinky hossain you know what? your parents might be too blinded by religion to care about you the way they should but you know who cares? me! and this community. we’ll be okay.
I GOT THIS TOO! I told my mom, you made me depressed! And she was like, I dont believe your depression is real, you just want attention. something along those lines
Andy Holcroft I fit all of the symptoms, but I see people complain about what their parents did to them all the time while never working to improve themselves.
Me: *Withdraws to make sure I don't get hurt" My parents: "You never talk to us and you only care about yourself" Me: *Talks to parent to try and form a relationship* My parents: *Starts huge argument about something barely related and proceeds to criticize everything I've ever said* Also my parents: "Why are you depressed, lonely and suicidal we give you everything"
Nicholas Pather I feel you. I remember when I used to tell mom certain issues that took SO long for me to be able to say it to her. And she would just wine and argue, making me feel bad and regretting everything I said. This is one of the reasons I don’t tell my mom anything. Not about my depression or Anxiety. Or my new scar that I have...and now I’m traumatized by it. ( It’s a tiny scar I cut myself with a tiny piece of glass that I found. ) I will never hurt myself again....
Same.. I don't talk to my mom about these things because she doesn't understand and thinks she can just "talk" to me saying how I should be like this or it's nothing or it's my fault and doesn't care the next day thinking she fixed me and it really hurts when she does those things
SERIOUSLY THO!!! My mom asked me if i wanted chocolate and i said no thanks, and she was pushing me and pushing me and asking me why? why? Why not? and i was like "because i just dont want chocolate" why not?? "because i just dont want any!!" "ok you dont have to give me attitude. youre being so rude to everyone and its not appreciated." Like its MY fault she cant take no for an answer and has to be controlling of every situation!!!
Everytime I try to open up to my dad about my feelings, the more he uses the info against me and even blames me for feeling a certain way. And then he will just walk away making me feel stupid and regret that I even talked about my feelings. I think I am desperate for help. I have nowhere to run to. No one understands. I feel like I'm gonna die.
Simply Pinay oh nooo same I will pray for u sweetie ur not alone I tired researching gaslighting and emotional abuse and the more I saw the signs the more confused and trapped I feel it’s to the point were I want to escape and then I regret the feeling. Ur not alone I understand God bless u keep being strong! From another struggler to another ❤️🌻
I can understand how u feel about that stuff because I have expierenced stuff like this myself (sorry for bad English I’m from Germany) don’t want to sound harsh but I think for your own good it would be better if you stop talking with your dad about your feelings
That’s so true, toxic parents are always putting the blame on their kids, talking down to them, controlling them, and always trying to insert their dominance. Remember, you are what you know you are, nobody, not even your toxic parents knows what you can really accomplish and capable of doing.
My parents: *Raised beating, kicking, punching, spanking me; Yell at me that they want to kill me but told me that is not true, insulting me, Being narcissistic parents, throwing my self-steem in the hell and a lot of toxic things.* *Also my parents:* Why do you have low self-steem? Why you don´t love yourself? Why are you always biting your nails? Your friends are a bad influents for you because we didnt do anything to you. We are good parents; I don´t know why you act like this but is not our fault. (sorry for the bad english I'm not fluent)
It's the same here for me, everything bad was my fault even as a little baby. I'm still trying to deal with it, my partner loves me, and it's great, but I'm still trying to undo the years of abuse from my parents and gardens. I was so scard my parents would kill me, they toght me to lie if I was asked, I knew if I didn't it would be much worse. I hope someday we can all be safe and heal from this. I hope you all can find someone who truly loves you and can help you heal.
@Fiorella jaurequi your English is better then mine, and English is my 1st language lol. I love to study other languages, but it's hard to not spell them right lol!
my parents : why dont you talk more? me : cuz i dont want to or dont have anything to talk about my parents : get mad and say is there something wrong you me: i'm an introvert my parents: whatever shut up after seeing some strangers cry on the tv when talk about some stuff about their life that they didnt tell anyone: oh they're introverts and me be like : really?
1. You have a higher risk of developing anxiety disorder 2. You may suffer from PTSD 3. You may be highly self critical 4. You're more likely to develop health problems 5. You have a hard time saying no because your boundaries are often crossed 6. You may develop an insecure attachment in your relationship
If u experience critique, defensiveness, ghosting or stone walling and contempt to one degree or another from ur friends or fily, then u r around some toxicity
Eduardo Severo i think i understand you. My parents took me from therapy and not let me do anything. My dad is kinda alcoholic (also a peace of shit). Don't really know what to say. Hope yours get better
Congratulations for allowing yourself to feel anxious instead of suppressing, numbing, dissociating from, or denying your anxiety! This may look nuts, but you truly must feel a feeling to heal a feeling. Admitting your having anxiety issues is VERY healthy, and I hope you feel good about both yourself and your willingness to do this. Anxiety was so painful and scary for me during childhood and adolescence that I learned to do all of the above AND distract myself from it by immersing myself in books, among other unhealthy habits. I had great difficulty with relationships, both with myself and with others, even my husband with whom I spent 20 years! Only since he passed away on Veterans Day 2015 have I begun to truly heal. I often feel bad that my inability to express and work through my feelings limited aspects of our relationship even though we cared for one another a great deal. Take good care of yourself.
Woah I'm so broken. I can't wait to be adult and live with someone that will make me feel loved. Someone who I can trust... Sometimes I feel like my broken pieces will never come together again...
The person who most needs to love you and whom you most need to trust isn't some magical rescuer with whom you'll live someday, it HAS to be YOU. NOBODY else can meet the needs your parents failed to meet, no matter how much you think someone can or how much they may want to. When I was a teenager I thought everything would be better once I "belonged" to someone who "loved" me, too. Instead, I clung to people who were even more damaged than my parents who used my need for what I thought was love to use me. Please don't pin your hopes on someone else's love fixing you.
relatable,also when you think about it,its just sad how all of us ''kids'' want to grow up so fastly and we dont get to enjoy life at this age as much as people with normal families.
Some random friendly words of hope: PLEASE IF YOU NEED HELP FIND SOMETHING TO FIND HOPE IN, NO MATTER HOW SMALL, NO MATTER IF IT TAKES YEARS, IT WILL BE WORHT IT ( You know, you'll always regret hate comments )Just so you know, the universe and me will be supporting you (and everyone along on this journey) no matter what. If you want to have comfort and need help please NEVER be afraid to ask for help or call a crisis hotline, it could change your life for the best, happy moments may not become so rare, and there is no shame in getting help, you're not alone, it is very normal. Every grain of grass has a purpose, and I love you, and you have people who love you. Feeling nothing is never feeling happiness or comfort or relaxation or love or pleasure, so keep on living with us in this beautiful life we are so very enchanted to be in together. Be grateful for your pain, it makes you stronger. If this message can help ANYONE, I'm so grateful I tried, either way, Much Love
50% of marriages end in a divorce. May not be extremely traumatic but I'm sure it's messed a lot of our society up. It's making me think twice about getting married now, may wait til early 30's.
It's not some magical chronological age that matters. What really matters is the maturity of oneself and one's potential partner in marriage and their compatibility with each other.
Obviously. Getting married earlier just means people are going to mature and change a lot more. The person you married at 21 is not the same person you married at 31.
Keyboarding That’s because people tend to rush into marriage. If you do consider getting married, you’d better be sure that she/he is the one for you and that you are the one for him/her. It’s a very give take relationship and you’re going to have to be willing to compromise on a lot of things. As time changes, people really don’t change that much, but you’ll need to respect each other and always try to resolve fights before you go to sleep.
Yup to the whole “product” thing. My mother gave me a whole speech yesterday about how I’m not grateful enough that she “gave me here genes”, and therefore I must thank her for my appearance. I know that sound really weird, but she was dead serious when she told me that.
it's not weird. some parents, often asian parents, feel the need for their children to thank them for passing on their genes/reproduction, doing the minimal of parenting, etc.
Huh. No wonder I have depression, anxiety, PTSD, migraines, POTS, a weakened immume system, panic disorder, and violent trust/relationship issues :') WHO KNEW???? 👍
I'm in my 60s and still trying to get my life back. I can't tell how much of what I feel is real, or you're just doing it to get attention". But there's a reason I never had kids: I didn't want to do to a kid what was done to me. Oh, I wouldn't do it on purpose, but I'm sure my mother never [well, rarely] did it on purpose either. But she did it. Ok, so she had a rotten upbringing herself, but is that any reason to pass it on? ps much later: It was rather a shock to realise that I had, in effect, committed genetic suicide, that my genes would not be passed on [so much for the Selfish Gene theory!] but that's a poor reason for having kids. Besides, my nieces and nephews will carry on variations of it.
franl155 I understand that. That’s one reason I’m never, ever having kids. Plus the boatload of mental and physical ailments that have a high risk of being passed on... I’ll stick with cats. Cats and I have no issues with each other.
I admire that so much, I'm proud of you because too many people go through a horrible childhood and then repeat it with their kids. You're a very good person 🖤stay strong!
@@giovannibarrow - thank you! I don't think of myself as strong. Maybe I wouldn't have been like my mother - but why risk passing it on to another generation? My siblings all have kids, whom they managed to raise without beatings, but again, why risk it?
@@franl155 I agree with you Franl155, there's absolutely no guarantee that they will be healthy and have a good self esteem, especially in this current world. The world is way too competitive as it is, way too much happening, I think it would be selfish of me to have kids. I'd probably end up compensating by loving them too much and making them co-dependant. There's no way I could trust myself to do it right, I'd be anxious 24/7 wondering if I am doing a good job. Something would rub off. Earth has it's children already, we shouldn't feel obligated to have them if we don't want to.
Me: has anxiety Me: has ptsd Me: blames herself for everything Me: has a LOT of health problems Me: always says yes bc is scared what her parents are goin to do Me: dull af Also me: good my parents r 100% toxic 👌
My parents were never there for me emotionally. I always locked up my emotions and never believed I needed help, I deemed help as “pathetic”, “weak”, and etc. I struggle with intimacy and empathy.
My dad once told me to stop being depressed bc my mom was working hard. I still don’t understand how he got to the conclusion of I needed to stop being depressed for my mom
I grew in a home with alcoholic parents, my step dad was verbally and a bit physically abusive. My mom was always asleep from drinking so I had to take care of my younger sister since they'd fight over who would do what for her. I got bullied and didn't have friends except for animals like the stray cats. I still have trust issues and I'm very afraid of being abandoned, not to mention having anxiety and depression. That's only a piece of my story but I really appreciate the awareness you guys are putting out here. People need to know about the consequences of toxic families
LightsAflame Thank you for the courage and sharing this part of your story. Having to take many responsibilities a child usually doesn't have to take care of (missing out on childhood and become an adult faster than it is healthy for you) is very common for children of toxic families, especially whit parents of drug abuse. I assume, if I interpret your words correctly, that you feel safer with animals as you have learned, in contrast to humans as your parents, that they won't hurt you. If you feel like the consequences of your parents' raising affect your everyday life, including your private life, relationships or work life, you might consider therapy. The earlier you start, the better are your chances of recovery for a good life you deserve. Much love!
Frederic Krassowka Yes I do I've always liked animals more than people. I've been thinking about seeing a therapist again but the last time didn't go so well. Thank you for the advice and compliment too, its very kind of you ☺.
LightsAflame that sucks, my parents mainly my mom is emotionally and verbally abusive. She is manipulative and controlling and I developed severe trust issues and went numb emotionally for quite some time. I'm a complex ball of things but I related to 4 possibly 5 out of 6 entries in this video... I'd love to hear from you though
I never even feel comfortable having my parents talk to me. I only really tell my friends everything. I can't even trust my parents with anything, because they'd either yell at me about it, or if it's something embarrassing they'd tell everyone.
Both of my parents were extremely toxic. My dad is a narcissist and alcoholic and my mom is codependent and OCD. I have no contact with them (for 8 years) and my life has improved in ways that seem impossible for someone with my upbringing. I do suffer from autoimmune issues though. Fibromyalgia, lupus and raynaud's phenomenon.
dad: CPTSD, BPD narc disconnected emotionally. cheated on mom. mom: co dependant, BPD. heavy narc traits, but loving, but guilt trip. hyper controlling. martyr. does all for us... wouldn't let us grow and choose. made is accept the "gift" ofdoing build-a-bear while we were... in middle or highschool.. infantalizing. just embarassing. control freak. changed couches all the time. cluttered newspapers across entire house, newspapers on couch, table, stovetop. but complained at the 5% of my stuff.. around the house. all 3 of us kids are messed up brother and I, are permanently destroyed beyond repair. we can't enjoy the things we used to.
My dad wasnt in the picture much so i lived with my “mother”, i write “mother” like this because she was never any type of “mother”. I had low self esteem, i was constantly stressed and felt like a slave in my home. I was not allowed to go out or have friends because i had to clean up after 12 people everyday after school. I met my amazing husband at 13 and he was the only person i could ever talk to because his “mother “ treated him like a slave too. Eventually i couldnt take being treated like garbage and taken for granted so one day i packed up a few things and just left,, i left without saying anything to any of my six siblings. I threw my phone and lived with my husband and his “mother” but that lasted six months because me and her constantly butted heads because i hated the way she treated my husband after all the work he’s done for her. Now im 21 living in a beautiful house with my husband and my “mother” has forced my siblings not to talk to me so the only family i have is my husband and im thankful to have him. Still living with flashbacks of stuff that happened and I constantly anger myself thinking about all the mean stuff she has said or did to me but its okay because what goes around comes around.
Maryjane4201998 Good for you! I’m legit so happy that you had the courage to stand up for yourself and take that big leap of faith! I commend you for that. I hope that you have everything that you could ever want in life and more. You definitely deserve it. *Love and Blessings*
"Are you experiencing any of these affects from toxic parenting?" My mom who is *NEVER* wrong: "Stop that! You're just blaming everybody but you for *your* problems! You're the only one responsible for your own unhappiness."
lol my mom, the endless cause of my life issues also my mom: why do u take the victims side of any story ALL THE TIME?? me: (inside) wanna take a guess?
My parents had nothing to do with drugs or drinking or anything like that... from outside it seems they could even be the best parents ever... but... because of them and only them (my parents and sister too) I know... well experienced all of these examples except the very last. And I found a lot of symptoms in myself having Bipolar Disorder/Manic Depression. And it never changes... how can I even help myself when I sacrificed everything I do... instead of fighting for myself... and I just give up for them and they hate me even more now. I just live for my two best friends... and if there I didn't even meet them... I guess I wouldn't even be here. I locked all my wishes and dreams and hopes away... and found some love here online. The two most dearest best friends who are always here for me. SO THANKS A LOT FOR THE VIDEO, IT REALLY HELPS TO UNDERSTAND!! ♡♡♡ -I just wish I could help myself too...-
Maybe you was raised in a narcissist family, wich have the same symptoms than an alcoholic family, actually is called the dry alcoholic family. Probably your parents are big big narcissists or even psychopaths that raised you in a very destructive way. I have a personal history very similar to yours, and everything was super confusing untill I discovered the term 'narcissistic parents', and suddenly everything start to make sense to me, why all that chaos, why my life was so messy, etc., etc., etc. Search about it, here in YT a great channel is Inner Integration by Meredith Miller, she's a great coach who speaks about it.
I blame myself for everything and I'm 22. My parents blamed me for not being able to get hired for a job because no job would hired me. My mom tells me that I'm too soft-hearted that's why I can't drive. My parents compare me to other adults and now I refuse to go out and I have all these "what ifs". When I say no to something, they become upset- which made it hard to sah no to people outside my family, my parents get upset because I didn't say no. Sadly, I grew up with parents who wants everything done perfectly, so when I'm with others, I become anxious and I'm afraid they'll get upset at me for making a (minor) mistake.
I suggest you guys open a discord server. Its a lot more private then regular social media. It can help a lot of people express themselves since it will be a much more closed environment.
Not saying that I have bad parents, or trying to sound like "the victim" as my parents always say. But they always want me to open up to them, but when I do, they get mad when I tell them stuff. I feel shamed for my own opinion and choices that I make. I sometimes feel that I'm forced to make adult decisions, but have no right to have my own opinions or voice. I also feel shamed for that. Sometimes my mum talks about her past with her parents when she is mad at me and talks me she should beat me like they did to her. It makes me feel like it's my fault the way she tells me. I feel like it's used against me as an excuse..
I’ve been watching these videos about having a bad childhood/adulthood lifestyle to understand why I act a certain way, just because I don’t understand myself most of the time cause I don’t ever really face my emotions and even at 19 I’m still dealing with not being able to control my life and just watching all these videos gave me bad anxiety because I still feel the same way I did as a kid I just want to scream and run from everyone I hate because I find/found my toxic family normal and this lifestyle normal cause I’m too scared to stand up for myself
I seem to have a covert bully and.it feels like covert bullying is the most dangerous form of bullying.I feel so empty and helpless dealing with my two abusers growing up...My abusers are toxic to my health...
Even something like therapy was ruined by me father when every argument turned into it is a two sided street and everything is my fault and they are perfect and did nothing wrong.
My parents: *beating me, hating me, calls me ugly, locks me somewhere, death threats me, yells at me, doesn't trust me, thinks I'm psycho, doesnt even let me make friends* Also them: you can't be depressed, you are too young to be anxious, why you don't have any friends? Why youre always quit? Why don't you talk to us?
Yes! Every single one of these especially when I was younger and a teenager, ALL of these signs were very prevalent and way worse. I'm 29 now and growing g up a bit and learning about myself so I won't make the same mistakes. My dad is passive aggressive and just doesn't want to deal with anything besides work, my mom is mentally sick with what we think is schizophrenia and paranoia with hallucinations and a lot of other things. My dad had gfs and finally married, my mom always made everyone's life hell. She's so absusive and mean and it's sad because she is quite opposite of that when she is not having an episode. She would verbally, emotionally and physically abuse me and my 2 brothers. My older brother and I got the worse of it. I'm glad my younger brother didn't deal with it though. I stated using at agen7 and became a full on heroin addict by my early teens and every drug in-between. I started cutting at 11 and 12 I'm 5 years sober and couldn't be more happy and grateful to be cognitive and understanding and growing. Thank you!
Firstly, you’re stunning! 😳😻 It’s actually quite sad how I can relate to every single one 😞 I absolutely adore your videos, so educational and an eye opener to some situations one may be blinded in or not knowing how to escape/change for the better. Also! Appreciation to the animation, always on point c: Hugs from London 🇬🇧☕️🧐🤗 xx
How can I get over losing a therapist who helped me through so much? She he,led me through everything and I no longer see her and it is really bothering me
It's something that we need to grieve. I lost the only doctor who ever really showed me care when he passed away, and I had to grieve it. It took me months to deal with it, and I still tear up thinking about him. It's someone you opened up to, and you feel attached to them. Allow yourself to grieve what you've lost from not being able to see her anymore. To us, they're like really good friends. I know I consider my therapist and counsellor both good friends. Heck, when I got the therapist, I felt like I was cheating on my counsellor. It's deeply personal, and it's good to acknowledge how much they really meant to us. Also, know that people like that can come and go in our lives, and that's okay. It's not something we may or may not have done, it's just life always moving and changing. You'll find someone else who can help you. It'll be bumpy at first. It was when I got my therapist after seeing my counsellor for over a year. I had to tell her everything I'd told my counsellor before, and it was hard to feel like we were getting anywhere. But, within a couple sessions, we were making more progress than my counsellor and I had in some time. Not to sound like a sales pitch, but I found 'BetterHelp' really good. They lowered the payments significantly when I contacted them and said I can only afford (insert small amount) and desperately needed the support. They were super helpful with it, and my therapist has been incredible. I suffer from PTSD, Autism, sensory sensitivity, ADHD, fibromyalgia, chronic pain, chronic fatigue, and two possible rare conditions known as EDS and POTS. And, this therapist broke through doors I didn't even know I had, and she made me challenge my thinking patterns. So, if you need a new therapist, they can help you find one that will perfectly suit your needs. If the first one doesn't work, you can change therapists until you find someone who is perfect for you. I really hope that you can feel some comfort in all this. You deserve to have someone help you with your challenges like a therapist and feel comforted in your worst days. At least know you have people who know your situation and feel for you. Sending a virtual hug your way. 🤗 Hang in there.
My therapist retired last year. It’s been tough getting used to someone not knowing anything about me or my sickness. But, it’s survivable. Best wishes
Bethany Harbaugh When you say therapist and then counselor, what exactly do you mean? What are the differences? And that website/place you mentioned is it international?
Angel Starwind i woulda called the cops, and told every teacher i had. 0.o. was molested by my step dad, but that is fucking worst imo. sounds like (if boy) attracted to you in a gross way. (if girl) jealous of your body, and taking it out on you. Some moms can be jealous of their daughters more so if the dad dotes on them a good bit.
This is why it's hard for me to open up more to my therapist what if I open up everything and they go or retire I'm not opening up myself again exposing myself to a new therapist i don't know
I can relate to more than half of those symptoms but I'm not sure if my parents really are toxic... I'm confused about them, one moment they yell at me and the other moment they are nice to me and everything. They don't really respect my sexuality and then say that they support me. They don't respect the person I am and then say I should follow my dreams, but they don't appreciate my dreams when I tell them what I want to do with my life. They made me shut up about my mental health (I got depression, anxiety, etc) and say that they care about me. I'm seriously confused, I desperately try to get out of their control and this leads to even more arguments. I don't know if my parents are toxic, I only know that I'll move out as soon as I'm 18
Same, adding that I can't understand people who had been trough a lot of romantic relationships with an average of 1 year, this kind of couple getting dragged by so easily without knowing each other well to build intimate trust and love. I know now that they just want to fill the hole of love that their parents never did properly and build their self-steem based on the relationship. But honestly, it seems so lonely and desperate to my eyes, cause' they'll be suffering and dreaming again about the special partner once they end a relationship, and be finding quickly about the next neighbors that will be crossing near their destiny.
Ghost-Faced Hindu The woman that gave birth to me got me fired, destroyed my 7 year relationship, made sure I ended up homeless in which I am on this moment, and finished distancing my relationship with both sides of the family. And all that this month 😊
D.M.S. you have to build it up bit by bit, not sure how bad it is for you, but example cooking a meal for someone, you trust that it will be edible and they won't reject it unkindly, telling someone about yourself, starting with small things in passing and then up to stuff you've only told a few people. I think it's about realising a content future with periods of happiness relies on you working on it no, you are doing it for yourself, also it's about self trust, knowing you can deal with inevitable rejection, by accepting it, feeling the natural reaction and continuing on. Where will you be mentally in 5 years if you don't trust anyone? Where will you be mentally in 5 years if you take small steps to trust others. It will be hard, but it's necessary....I'm saying this to myself also!
thechampionessa I actually do that, but I see it in my romantic relationships, which pretty much don't exist. I'm not capable of feeling anything and when I do I get rejected eberytime.
D.M.S. I'm only starting to build friendship trust, but have no experience romantically. Is it that you can't convey what you're feeling to that person you're with, or you can't approach potential partners? Or do you feel nothing strongly with the person you're with. Perhaps they're not right for you, but also it's about odds, you won't click with everyone, but also however being rejected is, if you ask someone out once a month vs once a week your chances are low, it's almost like a game, and perhaps you should treat it like a game for practice. I've seen some videos on RU-vid about confidence challenges, e.g. asking ten people for favours everyday, ones that you will rejected on, i.e. asking for free petrol, asking for lots of money from strangers, or videos where they have a goal to ask for 50 numbers in a day. The goal being to make rejection normal, make failure normal, therefore making them normalise what they feared. It must be hard, but if you paired up with someone to do that one day then you have some companionship in the challenge
@Alphfia YOU might think you feel that. That doesn't mean anyone else will. Be careful about coming here and telling abused people that YOUR religion will "help" them.
Ironically I developed more frequent heart palpitations more in my teen years and even till now. Everyone gets them but my teens years+ were the most straining and difficult years ever and that's when they started to get more frequent. This makes me scared that I'm always going to have heart issues now. I can't even exercise or drink caffeine much anymore due to it, even my anxiety makes them flare up super bad :(
Everything else listed is me too. Why are parents this gross at times, I know some don't realize but you'd think they would or would TRY to find out what's wrong if their child is suffering...I don't get it
Oh, me too. I began to have cardiac arrhythmias around the age of 17, until today, perhaps because I am the daughter of narcissistic parents, codependents and my father is an alcoholic rehabilitated. My childhood was not so terrible, but I do feel that it was very sad, lonely and that I was treated with enough negligence and indifference on the part of my parents. Adolescence was a real ordeal, and I was very physically and psychologically abused by my crazy parents, especially by my mother, who treated me horribly simply by changing to being adolescents and later adult. I also developed depression and generalized anxiety, which has fucked my life a lot, I have already gone to psychological and psychiatric treatments, but I feel that deep down I do not improve much, only very superficially. And now I feel that I have relapsed again into depression. Really, it will sound exaggerated, but it is a misfortune to be born of narcissistic and abusive parents like mine.
Edith my parents are abusive and narcs as well. So I feel you and totally understand...Sorry you had to deal with a family like that too :( sadly some people don't realize how rough these types of parents can be like too.
SexyDinoNurse it's ok. You arent alone. I was like that as a student for 8 years. What helped me was Yoga, therapy, asking my friends to help me break down issues logically and even sleep hypnosis videos to help relax. As my anxiety slowly went away i felt more energetic and was cleared to exercise. That led to even greater confidence.
AllTimeAmberx I wish I knew. All I can say is, cats are very therapeutic. Just visiting a shelter and giving them some love, all the purring... Not a cure, but a very nice respite. And watching Captain America, but that might be just me. 😂
My parents weren't the best. My dad used to get drunk, hit and spank me and my big brother, verbally abuse us, neglected me when I lived with him during my first year of highschool, and would play victim every time he was called out. When my big bro started going to school after being homeschooled by my mom, she became extremely depressed. She only got out of bed when absolutely nesisary. I was left alone in front of a TV when I was very young. And when it was almost time for dad to come home, she would clean up my mess and go back to bed. Because of this I can't do some things, like do the dishes or pick up trash. My older brother tried to sexually assault me when I was a preteen and bullied me a lot when I was small. My little brother Aldo bullied me when I was out of school trying to deal with myself. Even as I'm typing this I am alone. My mom is out dropping my big bro off at work, even tho he is old enough to buy alcohol. My little bro is at my dad's house where he is exposed to drugs and alcohol and expected to clean. I'm 17 and I still feel like a monster for not cleaning. I hate myself, and always will.
I was in an abusive home when I lived with my mom. Now I'm messed up and still in therapy. Living with dad isn't so great either he is a helicopter parent from hell
We're either students or graduated students with research and writing background. Most of our content have the citations and references for your own further readings. Here's the article we based this off of: psych2go.net/6-side-effects-of-toxic-parenting/ The citations can be found at the end of it. Did you guys want us to transfer the citations here too?
I think that's not necessary but it's a good idea to mention the sources in some way. The first time I checked out the website and saw the articles I felt more confident the videos weren't just some thoughtless clickbait generalizations here and there.
My parents be like “ YOU never do anything in this house” and even when I put all my effort to try and make them feel better they just shut me down with negativity such as” yea ur only gonna do this this one time “
I lost my best and only friend (who ive been friends with for 8 years...) bc of her parents...simply just bc im not a muslim... tho they arent my parents... they sure have messed up my life...
Welp I wish I had that I move school about 2-3 year the only school that I loved was a school with steriotypes you can tell how that goes cool kids dumb kids athletes nerds gamers and more
LPS Sam you can always make it through. Hell, I still am, but don’t end it all. I learned this trick where if you think life isn’t worth it, just take a few minutes to breathe in and out and think of something you would never want to leave this world for. It’s hard but you have to stay strong
I hope I don't get these....im still a kid (to me I feel like I'm 20) edit; I mite has a couple of these ;-; edit 2: no wonder I'm clingy as heck but I hide it decently
This is my true experience. My parents be like: We love both of you. You and your younger brother are same for us. When they want divorce: I want my son to be with me. Okay then, let's not get divorce. 😢😢😢😭😭😭
its hard to tell whether my mom is actuallly toxic or not, I mean my dad used to abuse me from time to time physically when i was still little, about 9-11 years old and i guess it just...scarred me. he died in 2014 though because he was an alcoholic. Now i'm 15 and i have a stepdad and a mom who emotionally abuses me whenever i do something that's ''wrong'' to them. Telling me that i'll never get a good life in the future and i'm just going to be a prostitute someday because I dont know how to do anything, plus the fact that i'm ''lazy'' (I mean dont get me wrong i do household chores often but i guess they just dont appreciate it, plus i've been studying my ass off just to make them proud of me, but nothing works. and I just...gave up.) i've never attempted to cut myself because i was scared, but i did feel numb most of the time whenever they yell at me or hurt me emotionally. Worst part is, I have a boyfriend, we've been together for 5 months now and i'm just glad that atleast someone understands me, but my mom knows this and she's totally against it, which causes our relationship to be secretive. He's a good guy though, he really is but he has a grudge on my mom now too because of what she did to us. Now she keeps telling me that my boyfriend is nothing but a fat ass piece of shit, and that she's right about me being a prostitute in the future because i keep chasing guys. or, well, specifically, my boyfriend. (like what?) She physically and emotionally abuses me even more when she found out about it and i just... i dont know. Me and my mom dont really have a stable relationship and I always feel pressured whenever she's around. I just hate it. I really dont know what to do.
That's definitely a toxic relationship. I suggest trying to speak with your mom/ stepdad as little as possible, and if they say something like that again, just agree. Say things like: oh you have a good point, I apologize or just say:you're right, I'm sorry. If you repeat that enough, you're parents will give up talking to you. If they abuse you, apologize but make sure you do it with as little emotion as possible and look them straight in the eye. Unfortunately by doing this you will become very distant from your parents but I think that's what you need right now. I do it sometimes as well and it shuts them right up.
iblankiie and also, I'd like to say that I truly relate to you because I'm 14, and my parents always call me lazy and never appreciate me and honestly fuck up my life so much. I'm sure I don't have it as bad as you, but I feel you. I still love my mom, but I don't trust her at all and I don't talk much with her and avoid conversation. I have social anxiety and because of that I only have one friend and don't socialize, and because of that my parents think that I'm strange and have told me I'm not normal several times. Every time I tell my mom that she shouldn't have had me she just says that it's too late now, and on top of that, she always does the bare minimum for me and acts like I owe her the world for it. I grew up in a Russian household, which just makes it so much worse (I don't like Russian people) (Russian Americans are ok though not saying anything I am one myself) because in Russian culture, children literally do everything and parents barely do anything for their children, and are expected to get perfect grades and do multiple extra curricular activities and be extremely social or you are strange and weird.
Get out of there and away from them as soon as possible. You can make college your escape plan or there is always another way. This will never get better. Plan to make a clean & total break. I 've been there.❤️
Toby Hunter me too. My father was abusive with my mother and I told her that I knew and she said that even if that happened he still loved me. But I don't understand how she can say that when he hurt her so many times. When I think about my past all I can remember is of my mom crying and them arguing. Ha there was this one time when I was little and my mom was crying so I brought her and me a slice of cake and when just silently ate it together. I haven't told anyone this so ur the first. Not just that though but thanks to my dad I have eating disorders where sometimes I eat a lot and get sick or sometimes I eat nothing and get sick. When I was 6 till when I was around 8 I used to never eat my lunch and when I got home I would throw up and get sick. My mom try's standing up for me but he doesn't listen and then they end up arguing over me. I really want my dad to leave us already or just die I don't care about him anymore I just hate him and yet everyone says that he does it because he loves me that he cares and it makes me sick I don't think I can take it anymore. I really don't.
I've been abused my whole life. Never realized the danger I was in until I grew up and learned what way to live. I felt inadequate to live an adult life when I left home to live on my own. The abuse was psychological and often physical and mental. One day when I came home from school, I heard beating and my brother who was four yrs older than me came stumbling out the bedroom doors with his face all messed up, nose broken and bleeding all the way down to his throat. He may have forgotten it due to the severe trauma - but I never did. I never did know how to defend myself and I still blame myself for not being brave enough for doing what I thought was right. I want to tell everyone what happened, every detail - to help my siblings heal from that trauma that has ruined their life but also to let people know that it is happening. This child abuse is real and is happening on a daily basis. I remember how she pulled my hair and shook my like I was some kind of doll she wanted to break, how she stomped her foot on my throat, threated my life with a knife and much more which I am too ashamed to reveal. It has changed my life forever. I will never forget and I will never forgive. No matter how much people preach on the forgiveness part. You were not there.
I really enjoy watching your videos but it’s kinda annoying seeing the same clip at the start of every video (the „we just wanna take the time to thank you“ clip“) over and over again... Like i get it, you are self-funded and I totally understand that you need the money and all that, but how about integrating that clip to the end of the video, so everyone who’s already informed about your patreon doesn’t have to skip the beginning every time? Sorry if that sounded rude or something, I really don’t mean to be rude. Thanks for making these informative and interesting videos!
I remember when my mom found out my dad was cheating on her around the time I was 8, she started waking me up for school every day with a belt. It only got worse from there. Now she's older and in bad shape and needs me, so of course it never happened. My dad is the same way. Maybe one day I'll have the strength to cut them loose.
Yep, I suffer from all of these things D: I was emotionally abused while growing up by my stepdad but i've also experienced a ton of other traumatic things, which has led me to have complex PTSD and Fibromyalgia
My parents: Why don’t you go out of your room, you never talk to us,why are you so distant from us. Me in my room: Crying, wanting to kill myself,doesn’t eat cuz from body shaming, flinches at someone raising their hand,personality disorder,doesn’t trust my parents with anything.
