If we're dragging Pauline for her mayoral failures, let's also drag Mayor Lewis in Stardew Valley. His town's falling apart and he does nothing about it. If you follow up on a secret note you get later in the game, you can also find a solid gold statue of himself that he's hidden behind his house called 'the mayor's secret project.' How many taxpayer dollars went into that particular vanity project you have to ask.
LOL no way i didn't even know about this with all my hours in stardew, i knew the mayor was a perv and that he was messing around with.... tubby farm lady (forgot her name marline? marnie? or whatever)
Pauline fails to prevent foreign propaganda from infiltrating her jurisdiction, poor foreign and domestic policy but uses festivals and popularity to hide her mistakes? That's basically a prerequisite for being a politician. At least she can sing.
Seriously, Sebastian's mother is *worse* She put his room into the cellar and 5hete are zero windows. This room isn't allowed to be used as a living space at all because a) Sebastian cannot leave it if the house burns and b) how is he getting fresh air in?
I have another example from Ocarina of Time. The guards in charge of defending the Gerudo Fortress will apprehend Link if they spot him sneaking around and toss him back in his prison cell however they don't confiscate any of his weapons or equipment allowing him to repeatedly escape.
In Winston's defense: In the Manor level of "Tomb Raider III", he also puts on a bulletproof vest and lets you shoot him on the training grounds. Now that's dedication to your job!
@@thesmithersy It would have been funny to see classic Lara drinking tea she always seemed more of a tough "action heroess" to me like she was trying to get away from the sheltered "well to do British" lifestyle and it wouldn't suit that image. However modern Lara seems like she embraces this "high society" image without being a "I am better than you" snob whilst not going as hard on the "action heroess" being more vulnerable but still tough and capable while actually being intelligent and a knowledgeable archaeologist which I honestly prefer and I could easily see new Lara taking tea. So for the long post.
Well, it is heavily implied that the Poe Seller is the guard who wanted you to smash all the pots. If you talk to the guard at night he even says that he's interested in ghosts.
I think from the way Pauline delivers that line, she's implying that Bowser absolutely did not pay for all those signs and posters he's had his army install without city planning permission.
Also after you get rid of the big mechanical bug wrapped around their version of the empire state building Cappy your sentient hat companion notes that the city got back to normal really quickly and it shows the mayor is on the ball.
I thought maybe she just didn't know Bowser was bad. She interacted with Mario one time before, and that was when DK was the villain and Bowser didn't exist yet.
There's at least 50 different ways to kill each target and usually a dozen major tricks that get a specific in game lead around to. Sniping them via the Kardashian is by no means the intended normal strategy. He can also show up in one of the sniper missions locked in a locker. Free him and he'll help you complete your main mission.
I've said it before and I'll keep saying it. Andy's spoiler crawl monologues are peak Andy humor. Every time I see him in the chair I think "Oh boy, Andy time!" very good
The Dragonborn is such a great singer. Their voice really blows people away! Also, the funny part about the Powerwash Sim Tomb Raider dlc is that Lara Croft herself messages you on the first level asking you if Winston let himself out of the freezer quickly enough to serve you tea while you worked.
My fav example is KOTOR's "deadeye" Duncan: he's suppose to be a "professional duelist" but he has a losing steak of 55 matches and it takes effort to actually lose to him. There's even cut content that when he miraculously escaped Tarris, he couldn't find work as a merc cus his reputation was just that bad
@@BJGvideos It just didn't really work anymore when he is so bad, people are no longer really exited to see anyone defeat him. His career was ending, no matter if you step in and wipe your feet with him one last time, or just by fading out.
Wish they could have had a similar quest to when you help that swoop biker on Manaan. In this case, you train Duncan to be a capable duelist and he replaces Twitch as the final (non-lethal) duelist you face.
Don't forget that the orcs DAD was also keen to see him die. I remember getting a letter from that magic courier THANKING me for the murder of his son and giving me gold for dispatching an EMBARASSMENT TO THE CLAN. A favor indeed Ellen
@@greyspeight8776 Actually if he is killed before the contract, his chief father will send thugs on you, but there are alternative interactions where you get a thank you letter instead. Also Lurbuk apparently also hates his father just as much and will send you a thanks no matter what if you kill Chief Burguk.
Fergus Graem from Witcher 3 springs to mind. He's a dwarven armorer near Crow's Perch in Velen, and you're led to believe that he's an accomplished armorer who's just in need of better Skellige tools. Then you hand over the tools and realise he leaves all the hard work to his female co-worker posing as his apprentice! She eventually tires of the ruse and challenges Fergus to craft the best armor when the emperor requests a suit. The suits are tested with crossbow bolts: the bolts bounce off hers, whereas the poor sap wearing Fergus's suit gets knocked off his feet!
To be fair, they have that setup purposefully. As she explains, nobody takes a female blacksmith seriously, but they clamor for Dwarven expertise. As I recall, the two smiths “competing” was at the insistence of someone else.
Hot take: considering the fate of nearly every helicopter pilot who would follow in the Resident Evil series, Brad wasn't so much a coward as he was a visionary. Maybe Owlbrain would be a better nickname than Chickenheart?
I watched my family's owl (wild but my aunt and uncle saved and adopted it.) grow up with a family of cats and a Chihuahua. My aunt would refuse to believe that the owl was the culprit when slowly, one by one, the family of cats would go missing. Until one day she let out old Jeff, her Chihuahua, out into the front yard and then swoop, Jeff was gone. She thinks it was another owl, that the family owl died and this current owl took its place, knowing her and the animals would trust it.
@@levilandes1719 Whereas chickens (roosters specifically) are so viciously fighty that they're one of the two prime animals of choice for illegal fight arenas. Making sense is not something you should expect with these things.
I saw that guard in the thumbnail and immediately heard the music from the garden maze in my head. Pro tip: If you want money fast in ocarina of time, it's faster to sell a fish or bug in a bottle to the lady sitting on a blanket in the market. There's a cave just outside the castle where you can get fish and bugs. But still break the pots for fun.
You can also empty one bottle of bugs onto the ground and collect two bottles from it. It gets really repetitive, but you can generate infinite rupees like this and buy whatever you want from the shops up the hill
@@SimuLord You should look beyond your country Where I live the corruption is so rampant that a politician can be a convicted criminal and still run for presidency And win.😂
@@SimonBuchanNz Well, Bowser isn't an enemy of Pauline directly is he? that's Donkey Kong! Yeah... Kong debuted as a VILLAIN. With Pauline as his victim.
Another good example is the cucco lady(who in majora’s mask gets the name of anju). Every time you enter kakariko village from anywhere, her cuccos are all over the place, and rather than rounding them up herself, she asks link to do so for her
Or the guard who's supposed to keep people from going up Death Mountain, but hey, this little kid gave him a Keaton Mask and has a shield he can't use properly, nothing wrong with letting 'him' past.
@@gryphose1849 He does a great job. You can only get past him with permission from the princess herself, so he's still following his orders. And he asks for the keaton mask as a favor; you don't bribe this guy.
@@shawntraub7249 Doesn't change the fact he let a kid through to a dangerous location (and by his own words he thought the princess was just playing a game.)
I'm like Pavlov's dog. I'm trained to always expect them being snarky over the spoilers crawl, then be sad when they aren't, just as I still expect a test-card crash at the end to some bloopers, but those have disappeared years ago. Still miss them. *sighs with joyful reminiscence*. So yay for Andy doing his thing in this video.
If I recall right, the Templar whose job it is to keep everyone out of the Circle Tower in Dragon Age Origins is not just easily threatened to row you over but can be bribed with a cookie.
I'm not a huge fan of Pauline either, but it was between her and Ludwig Von Koopa and you do *not* want to hear about his thoughts on Magic Wand reform.
I'd like to see a list of the Most Unintentionally Creepy NPCs I'd submit Dr. Doak. Like Winston no matter where you go he WILL find you. You can hide in the vents but he'll still try his best to get up there.
The officer on break from Astral Chain is the first that comes to my mind when I think of NPCs who are terrible at their jobs. Granted, this could apply to a few NPCs in Astral Chain. However, despite the officer on break being an officer in a futuristic dystopia, he is almost always on break. The only two times where he is not being lazy is in file 7 and file 9. There is no way that officer has a break that spans a couple weeks.
I would argue any Pokémon Professor would fall into this category. They’re supposedly experts on Pokémon but require 10-16 year olds to catch Pokémon so they can learn about Pokémon they should already know about
Nah, they're pretty genius. Hand a kid a pet and a tablet and then they're off to spend hours and hours crawling around the wilderness doing field research. It's nearly free labor!
The dex entries already being written implies that the professors already have this data and are employing you to further study them. Except Laventon. ...and Sada and Turo but that's for...other reasons (Jacq wrote the dex in that region too)
Also the gym leaders and Elite 4. Why should they, the best trainers in the region, do anything about the dangerous criminals/gangs/doomsday cults running around in their region and threatening Arceus knows what?
I've always interpreted that as oh these kids are going to go out anyway and might run into something I haven't studied yet. They're basically saying hey do you mind if I look at your notes
I'm also going to nominate Corporal Jenkins from Mass Effect who dies almost immediately on Eden Prime after pulling a classic Leeroy Jenkins and charging ahead despite all of the cover; and how do you manage to die to the weakest enemies in the games and what happened to your barrier? A solid and hilarious second nomination to Sister Theohild in the first Dragon Age, who - supposedly - would have memorized scriptures from the Chant of Light, given that it's her actual job and the main religion of the region... but instead she's too hungry and would rather tell people that the Maker will be your "bacon and shield"
Say what you will, but Pauline brought the nostalgia with that OG Mario section heavily for me! Someone was definitely cutting onions when I played that part.
But one thing the Kashmirian in Hitman can do... he can make a sniper bullet going through someones skull in front of witnesses still look like an accident. Not even Agent 47 can pull that off.
I'm pretty sure his "No Bodies Found" bonus score for his own results screen is removed though. That is after already having lost his chance at Silent Assassin rank due to being spotted with illegal items (the sniper rifle) in that building.
I also really want to put Chairman Rose from Pokemon Sword/Shield on blast here. It's bad enough that almost every Pokemon game has a 10 year old having to destroy a terrorist syndicate singlehandedly, but Chairman Rose is a special case. Despite having a monopoly over EVERY major business in Galar, he's worried about an energy crisis, and given that he owns everything it is quite literally his fault. Rather than unilaterally changing the entire energy source for the whole region to idk green energy or something?? which he could do, his plan is to enslave a legendary Pokemon and leech off of it despite the fact that it is very likely going to cause an apocalypse which it almost did in the past. Oh, and said energy crisis? It won't even happen for centuries. He has years to think of a solution, and instead of waiting for the Champion to finish the last match, he decides he HAS to fully commit to enslaving Eternatus immediately.
"Green Energy"? HA! Solar Panel production alone produces more pollution than most coal plants and Wind turbines kill avian wildlife AND take up miles of land. Both of them are also only optimal in certain geographic locations. Where Solar works in California or Arizona, it doesn't work in temperate climates like New England or stormy locations like the southeastern States. In different countries, Solar is even LESS optimal in the UK and in fact, most of Europe, which are temperate climates with cloud cover on most days of the year. This being said, the only optimal "Green" Energy would actually be Nuclear. Reactors have become the safest they've been in decades and are actually safer than coal plants, plus they produce thousands of times the energy.
Rose saw a legitimate threat but couldn't stand the fact that it was a thousand years away because he's a raging egomaniac and has to be the one who goes down in history as the big damn hero. Funny thing is that Macro Cosmos is probably even more evil without him than with him because for all Rose's ego, he at least cared about Galar. But with him in prison, his company is free to pursue putting the region's economy in a stranglehold. Also, the threat isn't his fault. Eternatus was an ancient being sealed away long before he was born.
@@Maniacman2030 I'm talking pokemon world where pokemon create wind, water, fire, and electricity naturally and have moves like sunny day to control the weather and some pokemon literally eat garbage or pollution. They're not constrained by real world physics
Ian from Fallout 1. Always blocked doorways and couldn't be shifted, used burst weapons even when you were next to his target, and - far worse - used burst weapons even when Dogmeat was next to his target. I have murdered him more times then I can count.
Gostoc actually has a pretty good reason for helping you. If you look a bit closer, you can see that he's missing his left arm, presumably to be grafted into Godrick. To be fair, I'd be a bit irritated, too.
Mr. Fantastic from Fallout: New Vegas! He admits he only got the job because he's got a 'theoreticall' degree in physics. Then he makes you do all the hard work and takes credit for it.
I feel like the kid guard in Pyrite Town in Pokémon Colosseum who is guarding the Kid's Grid is really bad at his job. Literally tells you not to look for a secret switch on the shelf.
What about the guard in Ocarina of Time who accepts 10 rupees to let you through the gate? True, he only does it once, but a soldier taking a bribe is pretty bad.
Have you seen how bad Hryule's economy is though. Dude probably thought Link being a small child armed with a butter knife and an acorn of a shield couldn't do much damage. And that'd he liked to eat this week.
In the movie, it looks like Pauline has made the jump to public office in Brooklyn, and *minor spoiler* it doesn't look like she's gotten any better at it.
To be fair to that Hyrule guard, there should be a game where there's a storage room next to a pottery studio where they put all their rejects, so OF COURSE you are free to break all the pots!
Geeta from Pokemon Scarlet and Violet. She's supposed to be one of the strongest trainers in the region, yet she puts a pokemon with a good starting ability at the back of her team.
Hey Geeta I have a Glimmora and a Veluza on my team too but unlike you, I know how to FUCKING USE THEM. What does Nemona see in her? Nemona is far stronger AND more competent AND more compassionate AND braver than Geeta could ever be.
Good outro done indeed:D Maybe Winston is not a best person to clean the façade of a huge mansion, but I wasn't expecting as good visual gag as those 3 wiped down bricks, in a game about power washers
14:03 Based on her saying "And he has the nerve", I'm not sure she agreed to giving Bowser much, if any advertising space. Also, I jyst feel bad for Lurbuk; He's a musically passionate outcast who just wants to follow his calling, & I want him to improve & succeed. Anyway, decently fun analysis video! Thanks for uploading!
Just ran into a good one last night playing Wasteland 3. Early on in the game you have to go to a nightclub called Little Vegas and encounter a guard who will very openly tell you that his only job is to guard a computer terminal that controls the AC in the place, then tell you how to override the AC to burn the place down if you could get past his watchful gaze, then go on to explain that if he were sufficiently distracted by a fight, he'd have to leave his post of course. All before politely requesting you not tell any of this to his boss.
In Winston's defense, cleaning the outside of that entire mansion would be a chore for even an army of professional power washers. Also Laura should really hire more staff.
Pokemon Red Blue and Yellow. The Rocket Grunt who sits in front of the Silph Co building falls asleep when he's supposed to be guarding the door. Instead he dozes off and allows a 10 year old to brazenly walk in and make Giovanni look useless, save the Silph Co building from a Team Rocket takeover and claim the Master Ball for themself.
The Gatekeeper in Fire Emblem: Three Houses is so awful at his job, but enthusiastic at the same time. He'll eagerly tell you that there's nothing to report regardless of the situation. There's a reason he became such a meme that he was made an unlockable bonus character in the spin-off Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes.
The thing is, he's very good at his job, but terrible at describing it. He will say there's nothing to report, and then casually mention everything that happened that he clearly took notice of. To contrast, the abysskeeper in the ashen wolves DLC is the opposite, always saying there's something to report only to complain about personal nonsense.
To be fair, as NPCs it was really their job to be bad at their jobs. An NPC truly bad at its job would be one which glitched out and somehow actually did its job.
Zote from Hollow Knight comes to mind. Constantly needing to be saved but claiming he doesn’t need your help. When you fight him in the coliseum he doesn’t even attack you. The only threatening version is based on a dream by one of his fans that believes his war stories
But... the jars would be there when their owner got back! After all, if Link leaves, then comes back, even if only a half-second has passed, they're all back! Perhaps the guard knows this, so lets anyone who comes in just go wild on them.
Linu La'neral from Neverwinter Nights. She's the healer you can optionally have as your secondary party member. Her running gag, however, is that she is incredibly clumsy and has never lost a job or an associate in any way other than through an episode of copious destruction.
Can you do a video titled 7 times your best friend or friend was a boss or the final boss? Eight suggestions for this list is Riku from Kingdom Hearts, Pixy from Ace Combat 0 The Belkan War, any Undertale character, Gunther from Fire Emblem Fates Revelation, Weatly from portal 2, Faize from Star Ocean: The Last Hope, Volo from Pokémon Legends Arceus, and Edelgard,Dimitri, and/or Claude (depending on the route you choice) from Fire Emblem Three Houses.
I actually felt bad for Brad. he wasn't the best, but he definitely wasn't bad either. His heart was in the right place. Guy's tough as nails too, took like 60 bullets in the OG RE2 game.
A helicopter pilot who decides to leave without your team is by far the worst kind of pilot. IDGAF where his heart is, because he's not doing his job, which is literally "Stay here until told otherwise."
@@ChristophBrinkmann He did precisely what Wesker wanted him to do. Barry and Chris can also pilot helicopters but Wesker, the evil team captain, choose Brad because he was a coward who had run away in past dangerous situations.
@@kiwiorishi But he didn't know that Wesker wanted him to do that. His job is to be part of the team and support them, unless Wesker gave Brad a direct order to abandon the team he still failed at his job.
I'm no airship pilot, in fact I have never flown one in my life, but I feel if a pilot addresses you with "waaaaah!" as the pilot of the Highwind does when he starts out in Final Fantasy 7, it's probably a good time to make sure you've got a parachute on hand. Fortunately Cid was on hand to train him up a bit!
I never knew there was such witty and sarcastic humor I guess I never played Skyrim cuz I took for it something that ALWAYS took itself seriously but I have to admit I love how much that tavern keeper hates her job🤣
Oh yeah there's a lot of really snippy characters in that game. One character, Lydia, is usually your first companion, and she has a bit of a reputation among fans for being really snarky at you. You can pretty much hear her wither when you ask her to carry your stuff, since she always accompanies this with a sarcastic "I am sworn to carry your burdens..." even if you're giving her awesome weapons and armor for her own usage.
Yeah, all the Elder Scrolls games have a great sense of humor! Morrowind's Telvanni wizard lords are evil-ish, live in mushroom towers they construct to require levitating to keep the riff-raff non-wizards out, and half of them are losing their minds. My favorite is Therana who has decorated her whole tower with rotting eggs. She will also roast you with lightning if you set her off, so she's still plenty dangerous.
Rouxls Kaard in Deltarune is supposedly the Card King's puzzle master, but the puzzles he devises are so fantastically easy to solve that it's a wonder how he even got that job
I mean, lets look at Papyrus from Undertale. Guy became a Royal Guard, despite the fact he can't fight worth a damn, nor does he want to and he can't build traps to save his life. He's also pretty full of himself with a dash of naivete on top.
Wesker knew what he was doing because Barry and Chris can pilot helicopters also. And as the leader, he would give them orders and they would have to follow them including Brad. I feel sorry for Brad, he was a great pawn.
@@sheltongolden4394 I did exactly the same thing! Make sure all goons were dead, and keep going back to the location that triggers the music, set it off, and spend the time practicing all of Laras move-set. Made for playing the rest of the game a lot easier too!
Captain Qwark from the Ratchet and Clank games comes to mind as being an NPC that is really terrible at his job. Reputedly the galaxy's greatest superhero, his contributions to the series generally revolve around greed, incompetence, betrayal, actively collaborating with the bad guys for personal gain and just plain being a really terrible superhero.
No one from Ace Attorney? You could fill a whole video about that game, in particular Winston Payne, Gumshoe, Maggie Bryde, Larry Butz... I could go on.
A lot of RPG NPC's are like this, I know in Breath Of Fire 3, theres a bit where you have to sneak past guards theres 2 guards that just let you pass as you do favours for them and another that hears a bell and assumes its the end of their shift meaning its easy to sneak around.
What about the train guy in West of Loathing? He relies on a guy he just met to get the train across two different sections of the map. And then the thing gets stolen, and he does... nothing. Nothing at all.
gostoc is a great gatekeeper. By telling you about the side entrance, he successfully stops you from taking the front gate, thus keeping the gate secure.
Lurbuk is so genuine though! I felt so bad after killing him. I don't join the dark brotherhood any more because I think Lurbuk is awesome and I don't want to kill him! Justice for Lurbuk!
Gostoc is such a royal Troll. He tells you about a "Secret" entrance that's a GIANT friggin' hole in the wall that anyone can see. And on top of that, it's FAR harder to get into the castle that way AND you lose runes to him when you inevitably die. It's tons easier to just go through the main gate.
Many NPC's in Super Mario RPG: - the town guard who can't stop a guy who runs - Booster's fun tower full of chompy dogs and bombs - the king whose daughter gets kidnapped every alternate Wednesday -
Johnny Sasaki from Metal Gear. He is so terrible at his job that it's hereditary. Johnny Sasaki Sr. was a terrible guard in the prequel, and Johnny Sasaki Jr. was a terrible guard in the main series.
Impeach is what Peach will call it when she annexes New Donk City, especially since they allowed Bowser to advertise the wedding, so the city is clearly in league with Bowser's Kingdom and should be considered an enemy
Croft Manor took forever to clean. I don't blame Winston for giving up so quickly. Dude is like an 80 year old Irishman. He's probably swearing under his breath, while he's groaning and farting around that place. 🤣
Don't get me started on that psychopath Zelda guard, there's a theory he becomes the ghost catcher and wanted Ganon's reign all along, he's not bad at his job, he's fascinatingly evil
