What’s interesting having watched dozens of this channels vids is you don’t have to remember ONE specific thing from a video, just the general idea of a situation you’re in and these techniques just sort of come to the forefront naturally. I am consistently put in these situations and these are f*cking gems of ideas. Take heed fellow folks who have regular stranger interactions.This is an extremely well done series. Congrats on the fantastic work!
@@stockyguru they really do my friend, you may fail the first couple of attempts but there are techniques for countering that too. Like laughing at yourself for saying or doing something awkward. Practice makes perfect. The confidence you will feel after a successful/meaningful interaction will carry over to the next and the next one after that.
Tom vocalises the inner nervous thought and let's it go. Then people agree with the natural reaction. It's the formula everyone with anxiety is looking for.
i can't vocalise that i am nevours because i am a old virgin man with low social skills no lifer full of traumas and no money for therapy dealing with a situation that is beyond my range of action.. but that might work for a lot of people who have anxiety :)
How to turn nervousness into confidence 1. Expand in awkwardness 2. When you pause to think about a question, look up and away 3. In sharing vulnerable things, bounce between sharing and joking 4. Telling embarassing stories is a great way to show case your own confidence 5. Reenact your nerves(bring out the past emotions) 6. Even a bad impression can make people laugh and love being around you if cannot commit to it 7. Use a surprised pause 8. Defend the people in your life if someone tries to elevate you above them
I mean, to be honest, he's a well-known star in movies, and yet he's chosen to be an example for this video, I have to speak well for the less well known people
If I’m going into an anxiety inducing situation I never call my nervousness or anxiety those things I always say “I’m excited” “this is going to be fun” I’ve done it before going on stage and before skydiving. Worked like a charm! Love these videos so much!
This stuff should be taught in school at every grade level I feel like people have lost touch and don’t know how to communicate anymore so everything’s just awkward lol Would explain why we feel so divided, in a technological world where we are all connected
Ahhh omgoshhh what is wrong with my brain 😆😆 somehow i read this as "start each day with a positive fart and a grateful heart" ... i mean it rhymes now so that's cool
I love watching your channel; you’ve helped me feel/appear more confident starting out in my new career and I can’t thank you enough 💜 This vid helped, but NOT in a way I expected.. I realized I do most of these things innately. That made me see why I do and it’s bc I’m not afraid to be vulnerable, I’ve had a hard long road with mental illness. That is humbling and freeing; you (hopefully) eventually learn that being yourself just helps people weed themselves out. And that is liberating. Anyone struggling to see the good in themselves, you got to the end of this comment for a reason- the good is there 💜 🧿you’re strong, you have supporters out there you haven’t met yet 💜🧿
I dont know how mutch I personally improved with your videos, but today I helped a friend trought a hard exam by helping him overcome his nervousness. Thanks for the great advices, sometimes it just clicks that "oh yeaa I should try something like this", and it works like a charm.
*“Life is much simpler when you stop explaining yourself to people and just do what works for you.”* To literally 1% who saw this comment, I hope you’re having an awesome day.
Dude your videos were everything I needed and have been searching for for so long. I thought I was weird studying celebrities and people on how they speak so I could use it. I wanted to build confidence and always imitated confident people, I thought something was wrong with me but I'm so glad I found you.
As someone who is awkward most of the time, the first tip comes naturally for people like us. It's a way to survive socially. Making people laugh can make an awkward person more likeable. Great tip.
People can only see what's in front of them. So work on having open body language, making good eye contact, and projecting your voice. You'll look confident even if you're terrified on the inside.
I personally will put on music that makes me feel confident like Dean Martin because he always puts off a positive and confident energy. Then I just sing along and imagine his good energy before I walk into a stressful situation. It makes me feel like I can't be as chill as he always was even during stressful circumstances
To anyone reading, this is a reminder that you are a POWERFUL being experiencing physical reality. Let go of the fear-based programming keeping you stuck. You are loved and supported
Stand and walk with your shoulders pulled back and level. Keep your chin level, with your face pointed straight ahead. Walk like you own the world, even if you don't feel like you do. Doing this will make yourself look poised because many people slouch
Hello charlie and ben, I really enjoy your videos and i genuinly believe it has helped me become more confident and charasmatic. lately i've been trying to improve on my leadershipskills and would like to ask you guys to make a video on it.
I would love to take the course. I follow your course since 3-2 years, and it really helps. But I'm a student and, unfortunately, I don't have enough money for this. Although, thanks for the videos, it helps a lot.
Hey guys can y'all please, please do a video on James Spader's character of Raymond “Red” Reddington from The Blacklist, i mean not only is he a total badass but he's also super smart and confident and doesn't care what others think of him at all, he would be great to do a video on i think.
I re-enact my emotions all the time telling my stories without even realizing it. I never found myself especially funny, I just thought I was myself normal but people keep telling me they laugh a lot around me and that i’m funny. I didnt know why 😟 Now I know I act like Tom Holland all the time ahah
Tom is the best 😂💕 I didn’t know who he was when he really gained popularity and was annoyed seeing so many articles about him. But then a video of an interview popped up and I immediately went into a rabbit hole of interviews 😆 Now it’s happened again with this video and I’m not mad about it.
Any tips for what to say if the other person directly or indirectly says they're worse at me than something but objectively you could argue it's true (e.g. more highly qualified in a topic)? I used to try and reply with 'well no, that's not true' or somehow try and 'equalise' us or downplay my achievement but I think it came across try-hard and brown-nosing so I stopped doing it. Now there's just a pause where I don't say anything. And then I change topic or try and talk about something they're better at than me at to 'cancel it out'. But I don't know if that really works. I hope I'm not coming across arrogant but I don't know what to say? I'm British by the way in case that helps. In the UK people are more skeptical and sensitive to brown-nosing than in the USA I think.
I think it depends a lot on context (are you close? What kind of conversation is it? Are they being nice or looking for reciprocation? Is it something they’re insecure about?) One of my favorite responses is to accept and thank them for the compliment, but then make a joke at my expense and to their benefit but that I’m not sensitive about. For example, I’m the most intellectually inclined of my siblings, but also the least athletic. When someone brings it up, I’ll say something like “thanks, I had to get some extra IQ points because I got none of the athletic ability. If I wasn’t at least smart it would be a cruel world.”
Oh, you know Tom Holland personally? If not, you're just making stereotypical assumptions in order to judge someone you don't know. Which, in the theme of this channel, does NOT make you seem likeable.
Confidence helps us feel ready for life's experiences. When we're confident, we're more likely to move forward with people and opportunities - not back away from them. And if things don't work out at first, confidence helps us try again. It's the opposite when confidence is low.😄😄😄
1. Expand in awkward situations a. resist the urge to shrink and look down and talk down to yourself when you make a mistake b. your reaction should communicate the you are unfazed c. Don’t try to hide his mistake, you can call It out and find humor in it d. Your body language communicates whether people will laugh with you or at you 2. Use your mind-body connection to shift nervous energy into excitement. a. Smile and play happy music to redirect energy. 3. Transform awkward pause into thoughtful pause a. Pause and look up to communicate that you are thinking 4. Bounce between sharing and joking a. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerability, can lessen the intensity by adding in jokes b. vulnerable emotions can earn you respect 5. Tell embarrassing stories a. Use embarrassing, emotional, or awkward moments as inspiration for charismatic storytelling b. Activate confident body language c. choose high impact words d. embody your characters 6. Commit to your stories and impressions a. an easy and funny impression to nail is the surprised pause 7. Defend the people in your life when theyre not around a. Maintains integrity and your disinterest in looking better than your peers and friends makes you looks confident
Please please please, can you talk about how to open up to people without making it awkard ? Everytime I try to talk about my feelings with my friends, they get all awkard and don't know how to react, so I feel like I'm ruining the mood and stop sharing, but then I feel super lonely. They have no problems sharing things with me all the time so I don't know what I'm doing that makes it awkard
It's not always you, sometimes it can be that your friends are awkward because they haven't gotten in touch with their feelings as much as you have. That said, I would first ask yourself what you're wanting to get out of opening up to people?
These are very interesting, especially for someone like me that usually have something to present or talk about something. Can you please do something with the late great Alan Rickman's charisma? There's something very charming about him even if he's quite stoic at first
To the *incredible person* seeing this, I wish you all the best in life❤ don't over blame yourself, accept things and go forward. Don't let others define what “success” is for you. Get up, learn the skills needed and get after it, all the keys to a happy life is in your hands. Keep pushing.
Today I have gone to college for presentation where I got nervous . Hope this video come earlier on this channel But anyways thanks for making these type of videos which are very helpful for me . Love from India 🇮🇳🇮🇳🇮🇳
Magnificent person reading this… The truth is you are confident and good enough already with who you are, where you are at and what you have right now to have the success you want in life. Don't let others define what “success” is for you. Get up, learn that skill and go after it! I believe in you so much! Have an awesome day! - Love, Nat ❤️
I cross my eyes while making ducklips, it automatically makes me laugh. It’s life changing. Try it the next time you feel like you’ve made a fool of yourself. You’ll feel silly, on purpose, and it’ll make you laugh and make them laugh.
What helped me is getting in touch with the part of me that was having trouble receiving compliments. Usually this means there is a belief that you are not worthy or that you're not enough. Let go of this and authentically receive the compliment. When it's authentic it doesn't matter if its a "proper reply" or not. Hope that helps and good luck!
I'd say, reenact the negative emotions about the compliment as little as possible and contradict it genuinely by arguing to that or say your appreciation. Like if someone said "you have a nice hair", you say "wait really(in a joke'y way)" and say "thanks". This response might be a bit NPC'y but you get the idea
Can you do a video on tips to have good conversations with family that u haven't connected with very well I've struggled creating and having conversations because I tend to stutter , say one answers and it makes it hard for my family to have conversations
Yeah well... All these advices are good but when you get overwhelmed by your feelings, start to blush when you feel awkward and such.. What should you do next eh?
Allow all of those feelings to come up, observe them, and let them go! You are not your feelings, when you are able to observe them you get in touch with the real part of you and the awkwardness goes away. Hope that helps!
you need to know your place, your values, a strong understanding of what talk is going beyond what is acceptable...Only then will you really know when someone is using some deviant chat manipulation or abuse to be able to speak up against it or withdraw yourself from the situation.
"Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks in great and honorable courses with a sure hope and trust in itself." -Cicero Look within my friends ❤️
Alright this guy showed Andrew Garfield, Tobey Maguire, and Tom Holland in the same video!!!! All 3 spider-men are gonna be in NWH confirmed. lol i’m just kidding i’m just making fun of all the conspiracy theorist lol
I literally do half of these and i thought i wasn’t a confident person I’m just shy and not that outspoken What should i do to help me speak my mind and not be such a people pleaser?
Wow! That blonde was really flirting with Tom. Intense eye contact, frequent smiling, playing with her hair, leaning forward in her chair to reduce distance.
Can you please do one video on BTS? And analyse why and how they are so charismatic? I don't think most of the celebs here hold a candle next to their personalities. And I really want to emulate their charisma. Please
I’ve realized I don’t remember all these things I remember one and use it works fine and then when I use it in person I always think of the video but I use the other techniques without knowing like my brain remembers and says “ ima help u our real quick
