One thing is true for all mortals: we do stupid things. Alexander Pope wrote, “To err is human, to forgive divine." What do we do when we make mistakes? Depending on the transgression, we may punish our kids or students, stop talking with friends, or break up with lovers. Worst of all, when we are the wrongdoer, we tend to be hard on ourselves, calling ourselves names like stupid, idiot, etc.
We think we are protecting ourselves from others and correcting ourselves so that we might not make the same mistakes. The truth is that the more we punish ourselves and others, the harder we are with each other, the more we get locked into a particular identity and might tend to keep repeating the same mistakes.
When we recognize our own fallibility, accept how flawed we are, and cultivate humility instead of arrogance, we can see that we are all in the same boat. Our flaws and foibles do not make us terrible people but rather are essential traits that help us develop the sacred qualities of compassion and forgiveness, which are far more effective in reforming us than anger and punishment.
Religious believers see repentance as confessing our sins and feeling guilty for them. They are told that only if they repent can they enter into the kingdom of God. There is a partial truth here and a partial flaw. Shame and guilt are functionally designed to protect us against harming those who are dear to us, and to make us behave better in the future. On one hand, people with psychopathy, may never feel shame or guilt. On the other extreme, children who are made to feel a lot of guilt and shame while growing up are likely to continue that pattern as an adult.
What then should we do to deal with our erroneous ways? The time-tested antidote has been empathy, compassion, and forgiveness. So then, one would assume that God must have empathy, compassion and forgiveness. How then could he send people to hell to suffer forever. Such teachings turn God into an evil, heartless monster. The truth is that God is unlimitedly compassionate and forgiving. He gives us endless opportunities to realize our mistaken ways, rectify our thoughts and actions, and ultimately align ourselves with the path of dharma, our divine godly nature, and come back to him.
10 окт 2024
