A Walk Through Dementia - at the supermarket 

Everyone remember this: THE PATIENT IS NOT GIVING YOU A HARD TIME, THEY ARE HAVING A HARD TIME.

My neighbor when I was a kid was an elderly lady. She was sharp as a tack. As the years passed, dementia destroyed her. I’ll never forget my last encounter with her. She was standing outside of her house with a suitcase while my sister and I were playing. She kept pointing to her house telling my us “your door is open! You need to shut your door! Someone can just walk in!” We told her “No no Anna, that’s YOUR house. You live there.” She looked so troubled and said “No. I’m going home. My mother is picking me up.” She sat outside on her suitcase for hours. My dad came home and tried to talk to her. She panicked not knowing who he was. My dad went down the street to her daughters house and told her what was happening. That made it worse. She refused to believe that was her daughter. She claimed she was 24 and waiting for her mom to pick her up and take her home…as in her childhood home. She still thought she lived in Poland! She had no idea who her kids or grandkids were….and honestly I’ve never seen something so sad. Watching this nice lady just lose herself will forever break my heart.

For the last two years my memory (mostly short term memory ) has been deteriorating ,along with my hands shaking. I'll be talking to people and mid sentence I'll forget wait we were talking about. It scares me because for the last 7 years of my grandpa's life I watched a very strong Man turn into a confused shell of himself. I got to hold him in my arms as his life was snuffed out. I think Cancer and Alzheimer are two of most demeaning and cruel thing that we as people have to deal with. I'm afraid of what the future has in store for me but it will not defy me. Thanks for taking time to read.

Might seem unrelated, but about the cashier's atitude. It reminded me being in high school, when I had to complete some forms at an institute. There was this almost blind lady who went _alone_ for the same sort of form. The woman who received them refused to help her complete the forms, so I wrote the necessary data for the lady. She was almost crying after that and she wanted to *give me money* when I was finished. _For something that was absolutely normal._ Didn't take it, of course. Please be kind with the elderly, at least where it's possible/necessary and they are not aggressive. You never know what is in their heart.

My grandmother had dementia. It would make me sad that she was forgetting me. Then one day I came to visit her and the nurse said, “look it’s your grand daughter, you don’t remember her?” She looked so distraught and about to cry. I was upset that the doctor and nurse did that. From then on I let her decide whoever she wanted me to be. Turns out I discovered that to her I was one of her best friends from when she was younger and I learned so much about her.

The fact that the layout was bland, homogenous, and confusing really helps to enphasize what people with dementia go through, trying to process everything around them... also Joe popping in and out.

Disconcertingly close to shopping during a dissociative episode "Wait, what am I here for?" "The milk was down that aisle last time, wasn't it? Which store is this?" "I could have sworn I had a twenty this morning"

I'm a full-on losing it crying mess right now! My Mom died of Alzheimer's. My only comfort about it is that the afternoon before the day she died I held my arms around her in her wheelchair and kept telling her what a wonderful mother she was and that I love her so much.

Alzheimer’s has got to be one of the cruelest diseases in the world.

I can't believe that such a corny and poorly animated video instilled so much fear in me

I remember when I was much younger, around December we were going to New Mexico to see some family for Christmas. My great grandmother acted very strangely and I remember before getting out of the car my mom said to me "Be patient and helpful with your grandmother, she's got some issues going on." She constantly kept asking what my name was and I kept telling her, some of the things she asked being confusing to me, at dinner she got both of our burgers confused, etc. I was thinking about it recently and it took me this long to put two and two together.

The part with the biscuits really hurt me.. The fact that I thought I didn't grab them but, apparently did really made me upset. And when the store "changed" It was so strange and so confusing. My heart broke while watching this.

I’m honestly more scared about getting dementia then I am about dying

At the counter when she asked to pay I just started internally screaming, "Where is Joe! WHERE IS JOE!"

this video literally destroyed me, along with everywhere at the end of time. dementia is horrifying and so, so cruel

it hurts my heart that my great grandma had to go through this, i remember visiting her and she kept calling me by a different name and pointing at a picture of my cousin and going "look its you :))) hows your husband??" i was only 13 and wanted to cry because just a year earlier she remembered me. its truly a heartbreaking disease

Our whole life is memory. Losing that is like losing everything... That scares me

My grandma just passed away after having this for years. She would forget what she just did, forget who you were, would see things that weren’t there. I’m happy she’s not suffering any more. Edit: wow 5k likes is crazy. to all the people who commented about their struggles with family members who have dementia, you will get through it, may God give you strength and peace ❤️

I didnt even know the layout of the store changed and i was literally paying attention LMAO

My grampa passed away when I was at a young age (10 or 11) and he was the first person who saw me and held and he was the first person to leave my life forever my few memories of him are...limited but he was very quiet and loved to listen to me (My last seeing of him was at easter where I showed him the new toy I got.) Aparently he had dementia and the reason he was quiet was because he was afraid of making himself look like a fool. When he passed I didnt think much of it, he didnt affect me in any emotional way and I only knew about him from the stories my parents told me. He was a member of the local church and he was quite the talker and always brought people together. Now as I look back on his death all I feel is pain, sadness that such a brilliant talkative extroverted person was crippled to the point where he could only sit on the couch reading the New york times while drinking coffee and watching tennis while his anxiety stricken wife cared for him. I felt regret for never knowing him and taking the time to listen to him. People often take family for granted yet what are we whithout connection? People with no purpose, lost and confused noone to love to cry on or to laugh with, when someone important in your life leaves you, there is no point in feeling sorry for yourself my advice is to continue to love them and tell their story, preserve the one thing that can make a person immortal: their history. Peace and love

The voice actor for the woman is INCREDIBLE. That “the store’s changed!” broke my heart into pieces.

Dementia and alzheimers is something that runs in my family. When I was little, my great-grandparents technically never met me because they always forgot who I was. They thought my cousins and I were some random kids from the street playing in their backyard. In reality, we'd been around them since we were born. Dementia terrifies me not because of the possibility of it happening to me, but rather the possibility of it happening to my mom. I don't know how I could ever deal with seeing her deteriorate like that. It's a fate worse than death: losing what makes you, _you._

Everyone: Talking about the tragedy of dementia Me: Impressed that you can move the camera around

My grandfather was recently diagnosed with early Lewy Body Dementia. He was a lawyer and extremely quick-witted. The symptoms started last year and have progressed a little since then. I'll never forget helping him in the grocery store last winter and seeing the complete sudden confusion on his face and the frustration that followed. It was heartbreaking. This video helped me see what he most likely sees when he goes out and it's different than the normal he was used to.

I don't have dementia but I did have brain surgery that leaves me like this. Confused, scared . Shoot, I went into a store that I don't normally go into. I got confused and I just sat down and cried. Trying to tell myself there's a way out. Augh!! It's not a good feeling. Bless the hearts who deal with this daily.

When the woman said "the shop is different" and i turned the camera to find out the layout of the building had literally changed i started crying. The bit with her counting money was also really sad. Jesus christ i did NOT expect this video to make me so emotional. Very well done

Although I certainly would be scared to ever experience a condition like this, imagining having to watch my loved ones go through something like this when I'm older seems so terrifying. I'm a grown 28 year old man, and I feel like a scared child, knowing that this could be a possibility for the people I've always admired and I have always seen as strong and sharp.

Damn, the fact this is extremely familiar for me is quite scary. That's exactly how I function when my schizophrenia gets really bad (the beginning, not so much the end). Of course, I realize this is only one aspect of dementia but I guess there are similaries between those illnesses.

I used to get pissed when people took forever like this, but now I just feel guilty

After being in my recommendations for months I finally decided to click on it and I’m glad I did. Sending prayers to all those who have family members suffering with this

Having worked as a cashier for several years at Publix I experienced many elderly people coming up to my register confused about things. I’ve had elderly people hand me all the money in their wallet or purse when it came time to pay for their groceries ….and they would tell me to take out the amount they owe. So I would count out all the money they gave me in front of them, then repeat to them what the amount is that they owe and….in front of them….I take out what they owe and hand them back the rest. I’ve had elderly people hand me bank envelopes filled with money that they just withdrew from the bank, and they would tell me take out what they owe for the groceries. You know they’re having a hard time if they cannot count their own money. It’s sad but they refuse to let go of their independence of doing their own grocery shopping.

I knew something was wrong when the milk wasnt in a refrigerated isle. Edit: Apparently there are heathens out there drinking room temperature rice milk.

My beloved mother had dementia. One day after I helped her to shower and dress she gently took my hand and told me that I was her best friend. I replied that I was. I was heartbroken but at the same time happy to be whoever she needed me to be.

Wow. My heart goes out to anyone that suffers from this or has to care for someone that does. You never know what someone is going through. We are always so quick to judge. This was eye opening indeed.

I feel like this in every public place, due to my social anxiety, I zone out , become disorientated, confused, and lost. Watching this made me want to run to get out of the situation.

the frustration when saw those biscuits like “I DIDNT PUT THAT THERE I SWEAR I GRABBED THE SUGAR”

„We’re getting busy“ Girl no one is in the line 💀😭

this is exactly how I felt when I OD'd, I sat in a bed while my parents faded in and out of existence, I suddenly had tattoos that also disappeared regularly, the nurses would ask me a question then I would start to answer then ramble about whatever was happening in my brain, it was odd.

This is so frustrating. And if it's frustrating for me, I can't imagine how frustrating and terrifying it must be for someone actually experiencing the confusion.

The old lady outright had no recollection, can’t even recall, getting those biscuits. That’s worrying how dementia messes with your memory.

Oh my goodness. I just remembered that, when I worked at a grocery store, I had a customer just like this. She struggled so much to write a check and we were all very understanding, but now I have to wonder whether or not she was suffering from dementia and didn't know it.

It would be way worse than this. In real life, the packaging is bright, competing and chaotic. Even someone without dementia can get confused.

My Grandmother suffered from Alzhimers for 20yrs and very unusually long time, it started right after her Mother died. My family was in denial but I wasn't. I watched a vivacious, witty, super smart, humorous, loving woman who worked full-time since WW2 slowly unravel into a pale shadow of herself. Thankfully my Grandfather died before the diagnosis came back because I know he would've done something to stop her suffering. My Grandmother's final years were something I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy. Then to top it off my Grandmother's sister that is 5yrs younger was diagnosed with it. Now each of the 6 other brother's and sister's have been told to get as much diagnostics done because the probability of them also having Alhzimers is over 70%.

My 91 year old mother has stage 4 Alzheimer's. Shopping with her is an absolute nightmare. She hangs on to the shopping trolley like a life raft and steers it through the sea of isles. She questions the size, price, colour and look of everything. Mother announces her pin number to all shoppers in the queue behind her before she is hurriedly ushered out. She has no idea where she has been once she is home.

Don't worry clerk has been terminated since the incident for her lack of professionalism with a lady that's obviously in distress.

Its amazing how RU-vid brings us together over and over again

My great aunt had dementia for six years. She had no children and her only living sister lived across the country. My grandfather stepped in to help her where she needed including moving her into his home for a few years before taking her to memory care. We knew she was developing dementia when she couldn't remember that her husband had passed away. She'd wake up at night frantically calling my grandfather wondering where her beloved husband was stating he never came home. We had to tell her he had passed for four years after he was gone. His children had scattered his ashes when he passed so there was no where for us to take her so she could see he was truly gone. She made him toast every morning and set a place setting for him at dinner every night. She'd write him letters before She'd leave the house and washed his old work clothes even though they hadn't been worn. Until the last year of her life she hadn't struggled with much. She passed away earlier this year, over the course of 2020 she was confined to her room in the memory care unit and wasn't allowed to see us. She started to decline health wise and started forgetting to sleep because she couldn't remember she was tired. And forgetting to eat because she didn't know she was hungry. Before she passed away she weighted 72lbs at the age of 94.

The people saying "but the store is empty" The video has served its purpose. You are now thinking like the lady with dementia.

Everybody gangsta until the speaker starts playing a kinda familiar music...

The elderly innocent Eniglish woman is sweet and her voice with that English accent is so cute.🥰💙💙💙

I'm am a grocery store manager. My first day as a cashier I was asked to help a customer who had dementia by his caregiver. This simulation pretty much summed it up. He was asking for the same things over and over and he kept saying he was lost. Afterwards, his caregiver practically cried telling me how patient I am and if I ever wanted to be a manager she'd write me a letter of recommendation. He has since died, but his caregiver and I still see each other sometimes. The first day she saw me in my manager uniform we took a selfie together

I've been diagnosed with a brain tumour, and I'm in my early thirties. This is how I'm becoming. I don't recognise my son for hours at a time. I repeat the same thing. I'm forgetting how to cook, how to read. People use yo come to me to write letters for them. Now I need help with my letters lolz. I'm right handed, but my right hand has become weak like my left hand. I can so relate. I remember, when I was younger, I use to find it a bit strange when an elderly person use to stare blankly. I thought they were being nosey with the countless questions. Now I know, they were actually confused, trying to put two and two together to make sense of the person, their surrounding, the next sentence in their mind and how to execute the whole thing coherently and simultaneously in an effective way. Very very challenging.

"Who's Joe?" and it was all downhill from there...

I'm glad someone finally made this and put it up. I always get stuck on this level.

My grandparents have dementia. Patience is your best friend when helping them. My grandma needs help on all fronts and he forgets about her. So they now live in a home where she can be safe and healthy as well as he can be in a stable environment without him running off to the store with nobody to watch her.

My grandpa has dementia. He's almost becoming like a child now. He doesn't always know who I am. It breaks my heart.

I wrote a long comment on this video about my experiences with memory loss. It took 8 hours to write and RU-vid deleted it 5 minutes later for some reason. I hate this so much. I just hate this. I hate my mind. I want out.

I worked at a long care facility in the '80s. We had one gentleman named George who had what is coloquially called "sundown syndrome", i.e. he seemed normal during the day but became progressively more confused as evening came on. He had one of two things he would fret about, that either he'd left his truck out in the field or wondering where his (late) wife was. We could relieve his anxiety about the truck fairly easily but the wife always ended up heartbreaking. We'd have to tell him she was dead (and had passed away some 10 years before.) Each time, when he grasped that she was gone he'd break down and sob as if he was hearing the news for the first time. I'm in my early '70s now. I never was any good at remembering names, and I've been a history buff my whole life. Forgetting names bother me, but it bothers me even more when events or historic persons I've known for years won't come to mind.

dementia is a horrible thing i had this neighbour he was so generous and kind he would always give me money when it came to my birthday or christmas or whenever i met him really. He lived through ww2 and it hurt me when he would say how he would go to school sometimes and his friends wouldnt be there, he was bright aswell he knew lots of things from the past even though he was almost 90 years old and had a lot of knowledge about everything really. His wife fell over once and because of his dementia he wasn't able to help her as i dont think he even recognised who she was so my dad had to help her up again. Then he started having carers round to check up on him until he was asleep and then one day we never saw him again, his car was gone not on his driveway anymore and we heard him and his wife were staying at a care home that was 3 years ago now and we havent heard anything since..

Developing a neurological disease and not having any loved ones around me is literally my greatest fear in life. Not only do you forget who people are, but people also forget who you are. All the special memories and traits that make you special just fade away as you become the "person with dementia". Sad and frightening.

I will start having much more patience with people. This is terrific and terrifying. Thanks for the lesson.

I'm shocked. I didn't know that dementia gave you 360° vision...

My mother had mild Alzheimer’s that quickly became severe over about 6 months. She didn’t even know my father, whom she had been married to for 70 years. Her neurologist suggested Namzaric. It was expensive even with insurance, but it brought her back to mild Alzheimer’s for the next 3 years. The medication took several months to gain full effect.

As an old person myself what is really wrong is that we are denied THE final decision. We should be able to take a black capsule and end the misery we're inflicting on others we used to love. We want to be remembered as capable and independent, not drooling because doctors want to keep making money keeping us alive long after we should leave. Let us go with dignity and make room for you. Personally I don't fear death - I fear painful, prolonged life.

as a cashier, the cashier annoyed the hell out of me. offer to help and for god's sake don't ask a visibly confused about bonus cards...

My neighbor had dementia and no surviving relatives. There was a non-stop cast of characters parading through trying to take advantage of her financially until finally we had to contact the state and threaten to go to the news if they didn't get involved, so they did step in and appoint a guardian for her.

Did anybody else have tears rolling down their cheek towards the end of that? My worst fear is my mom being diagnosed with and suffering from Alzheimer’s to the point that she doesn’t recognize me or have any idea of who I am. I can’t even begin to process what that would be like!😞

This was so terrifying. Like the idea that this could just be somebody’s future and there’s naught to be done about it.

I have looked after elderly residents with very severe dementia. When some of them speak they sound like they're speaking another language and will start crying but they can't tell you why and all you can do is give them a big cuddle and tell them itll be ok. Sometimes they will get aggressive but it's only a defense mechanism for all the confusion going on in their minds. I can't imagine how traumatic it must be in that situation and whenever one passes away I see it as a blessing as now their mind and soul can be at peace.

When I last saw my grandmother she was already forgetting many things. I didn't even really realise it, because I just enjoyed being near her and talking with her about whatever - telling stories, talking about basic things like the weather and food. Looking back, I don't know if she knew who I was, but I wouldn't change a thing about that time. I hope she enjoyed my company as much as I did hers in those moments.

My sweet momma recently passed from having dementia n Alzheimer's. It was so pitiful and very hard to watch her decline every day. I had one of the best mommas growing up. It really hurt to see her suffer with this disease. The last three years of her life was awful for her. But my mommas not suffering no more. She s safe with JESUS now. I pray for anyone that's going thru this or dealing with a love one that's suffering with this disease.

“The store’s changed,” threw me for a hell of a loop when I turned and saw the shelves in a different layout. How in the hell did I walk straight through the middle of the store when there’s a big old shelf in the way? This is definitely an effective video and I will remember to have more patience and grace for people from now on.

God Joe was a lifesaver, was honestly relieved whenever he showed up 😂

I knew of a man who had Alzheimer's. His son went to the same martial arts class as I did, and when my mom began talking to him for a little while, she had to write her name on paper for him to remember. He had a job as a pastor at a Baptist church but had to quit because he was getting more ill. He was only in his 40s; he had three kids, but by the time he was 50, he wouldn't be able to remember them. But then one day his son stopped going to class. I don't know where they are right now, but I hope they're doing okay.

My papa has Alzheimer’s and I listened to the track to see what he’s going through… I’ve already mourned his “death” He turns 80 next year… Happy birthday Papa… I love you🤍

Just imagine going through all fo that and being all alone. No kids, no husband, no family.

I feel like a horror game with this style would be brilliant.

My mom has beginnings of dementia. As a human being she deserves all respect in the world. As my mom I will do everything needed to make sure she is safe and respected. Great video, it gives a person a chance to realize what life 24/7 is like for someone who did not choose to have dementia. Compassion is the only way when dealing with someone with special needs!!!!

I’d forgotten what it was like to walk round a shop like this with dementia. Thanks you, who ever you are

If that were my mom, I wouldn't leave her for a second. He could have waited until they finished paying to put those things up.

I think we ought to cut Joe some slack. He is probably a mid teenager and this is still a time where his mother is supposed to care for him. He might not respond well to having the opposite way around this early in life. He's trying to figure out his mother while trying to figure out himself.

My grandmother passed and I felt fated to experience this video, thankyou im sad now.

I worry about getting dementia. I see my grandma going through it and it’s scary. She has to be watched now at all times. We try the best we can but she just gets into things. A year ago, she ended up in a strangers car at the supermarket. We had to beg with the woman not to call the police and press charges. The woman eventually understood what was going on, but my grandma just doesn’t understand what she’s doing anymore. She gets strange ideas and is very emotional. I pray I don’t end up like this.

It took me a while to realize this was one of those rotating things.

My grandma is in probably the early stages of dementia and it's been scaring the shit out of my family. It started off with her telling the same few stories over and over again but as of late it's become things like forgetting she was sick earlier in the day or when we lasted visited. It's hard to see someone who's always been mentally sharp go. Be patient with anyone who has dementia or Alzheimer's, its not their fault

Alzheimer’s and dementia are such cruel desieses! No one, and I mean no one, deserves a fate like this. Loosing my memory like this, is one of my absolute worst fears. I’d rather pass away than lose my memory. My old grandma has started to slowly lose her memory.. It’s mostly small things, like repeating the same thing a few minutes later, or forgetting what groceries to get. But it terrifies me, and breaks my heart.. I love her so much, and it’s devestating to see her like this.

If you have a loved one with dementia this is going to make you cry

Dementia is a cruel cosmic joke that nobody deserves. Saw movies are scary. This is terrifying.

First I was my mother’s daughter, then I became her sister. Loved her just the same.

That's so sad, it's a shame that we haven't made as much progress as we should have with this terrible disease. We have such amazing elderly people that have amazing stories and want to continue to live life like normal. This disease has inhibited their ability to remember and perform even the most mundane of tasks, which is such a tragedy. I hope that we continue with the research and we make a breakthrough that will get rid of it forever!

This is basically me after a 12 hr night shift. But seriously, my patients are like this and you just have to converse in a friendly, kind, and empathetic tone and address their concerns in a practical way. This will allow them to relax.

"The store's changed" and then looking around to see that the layout was different and I didn't see the aisle we just walked down just completely shocked me and gave me chills This video definitely accomplished what it's trying to show us

She said, "the store's changed" & I asked, "oh did it now?" not being able to even orient myself with the directional phone motion thing.

It's the confusion that these poor souls go through. It annoys me when a mistake is pointed out and confuses the person further. What they see and hear is their world and we must adapt. 7 stages. All loved ones must learn what to expect.

This is my vision when I dont have my glasses on but I'm fortunate enough to be able to see with glasses I cant imagine how scary it would be to be perfectly fine 1 day and then everything just becomes blurred and you cant remember things.

it's all just a burning memory

Honestly though, that cashier drove me nuts.

My grandmother has been suffering from Alzheimer’s for about 12 years now. Is in her last days now. So sad to watch such a strong, healthy, bright woman, waste away from something she had no control of.

My grandma worked very hard her whole life and when she developed dementia and lost her license she would get furious and try to leave the house to go work (she was 75 at this time) eventually she had to be locked in the house at all times. In the end there was nothing left of her memory, she didn't open her eyes, speak, or get out of bed. It was heartbreaking to see her entire personality just leave. My dad said it was the first time in his life her hands were soft because she finally stopped trying to work. She died at 85

This was a kick in the right direction telling me I need to be more patient with people