Absolute Cringe - The Bachelor in Paradise Week 2 RECAP (Episodes 2 & 3) 

Bachelor in Paradise is just like an airport. People come and go and unattended baggage will be confiscated.

Your reviews are legitimately better than the shows these days

“Shanae had a really hard time…” SHE LITERALLY MADE IT HARD FOR HERSELF AND OTHERS… so confused as to how this thought came out of his mouth.

Aaron ,and James aren't 100% looking for a relationship on BIP. I think the most likely outcome is they wastes everyone time, and leave together again.

Genevieve’s lack of self confidence is a turnoff.

Thank the Lord for your recaps because I want to know all the tea without actually watching 🙏🏼

I’m so glad I skipped this week and just saw your recap 🙌🏽

I love when these people have the conversations when they have to explain why they are with somebody else instead of just saying I think the other person looks better than you and just let it be that. Like Genevieve for example she's the typical chick to make a guy feel like he's not doing what she needs all the while knowing she's not interested in them then she pulls out the get angry and turn it into an argument to deflect. It's going to be so satisfying when the guy that she wants let her know that he doesn't want her to see her spiral out of control again women like that are so toxic. She is so needy and Shady. They want the guys to kiss their asses all the while knowing they don't really want them but if things don't work out with the guy that they really want they will go to them until they find another guy that they really want.

I usually love BIP but this season so far is not it.

Rodney is HOT COMMODITY! I hope he is the bachelor of paradise because he deserves it.

Britney's gasp and swerve of Romeo is iconic

Johnny is slowly becoming my favorite, as he perfectly plays the game of paradise. Head empty, straight vibes, chilling on the beach.

Can’t believe you didn’t comment on Jacob eating a pineapple WHOLE, like it was corn on the cob 😭

I'm very impressed with how Andrew handled that tbh respected his own feelings while also respect hers.

I no longer have the patience or the life energy to devote hours to this show. Which is why your recaps are both humorous and save me time. Thank you sir.

Your editing skills are top notch and i always appreciate your pop culture references

Why are they dragging Salley this season to look so undecided/ crazy? The producers are really bullying her. And why they were doing that we missed seeing all of Justin and Victoria's date

After seeing Teddi’s IG post, Im just *speculating* that producers might have wanted to push Teddi into a love triangle but she didn’t want to so she decided to leave before they forced that upon her. It’s the only thing that makes sense as to why she didn’t even say bye to her friends, to not say or do anything that would violate the NDA.

I rolled my eyes when Ashley and Jared are staying for "vacation" for what more tv time? Also there love story is not something to look up too.

Also, you mentioned Kira and Genevieve going through Salleys suitcase and how they should have said no, let's extend that to Wells also.

The airline news made we wonder if my hands accidentally touched something else then i realized it was fantake at his brilliance 👏😁

That Salley situation was some of the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen in the history of this franchise…and that’s saying a lot.

Ashley and Jared had an awful time and it seemed like they edited her to be an obsessive psycho. Then she went on Bachelor winter games met someone, Kevin and then Jared realised he better make a move. If anything Kevin and Astrid who MET in paradise and are also married with a baby should have been invited to go on the beach. Rubbed me the wrong way they did the "proposal" on the beach Infront of her ex bf who she clearly was with when Jared made a move. 🤔🙄 Don't come for me.

Oh yay we’re back to the girls acting like children! Honestly them going through someone’s suitcase, like that was so gross! Super disappointed at how they’re acting!

I hope some day the producers get sued for what they did to that one girl to humiliate her personal stuff. What the hell did she do?

To think production spent their time NOT showing. Brandon and Serene’s romance but a fake story about a cast member who didn’t even have a night one-who cares about Salley!!!?

This intro was chef’s kiss 🤌🏽 Bachelor Fantake truly does the best/funniest edits!!

Normally this is my favorite bachelor show but this season has been more painful than the normal shows so far. We’ve seen about 3 minutes of real relationships and the contestants are more forgettable than ever. Jacob’s monologue about his body goals is literally more relatable to a gym rat like me than 90% of the other conversations.

Questions I have after this episode: - Seriously? - Are you joking? - Sierra has four fingers? - Why did James tattooed his whole leg? - Do you guys need any more white ink to paint Shanae's and Victoria's red flags?

Geniveve is too immature to go on this show, two days is too soon for a spiral. She should have said ‘this isn’t my favorite thing but I’d go on a date at this point too so you should go and let’s chat when you’re back.’ Then she should have spent the day chatting with available men. When he got back with liking them both she should say ‘I still like you and I hope I get your rose and until you’re ready to commit to one person I’ll continue chatting with other people’ BUUUTTTT Justin picking her after all that means he likes highly dramatic relationships so I don’t feel bad for him.

It’s literally against FAA regulations to check a bag through without the person responsible for the bag on the flight…the risk of a bomb threat is too high…nice try production

Geneive totally needed Justin rose because she knew Aaron was coming Same as Brendan last season fight me If I'm wrong.

Genevieve freaking out was pretty emotionally immature, like she ruined her whole day on her own instead of accepting there are things she can't control. She's giving me high school anxiety. She clearly was upset at the idea of being sent home first and she calmed down as soon as the women had the roses and she could herself explore other relationships.

Brittany really does seem like the best I hope we get more sceen time with her! This Bip season! She my favorite so far.

Why can’t/couldn’t Andrew be bachelor? He would have been perfect- he’s funny, real, relatable, emotionally intelligent…

Bro that kiss attempt on Brittany made me cringe so hard

yeah this was corny wtf

the way rodney goes "Oh" and covered his mouth like 😭😭😭😭 he's so sweet please

It's incredible how clingy this cast is, they're defeating the purpose of Paradise

Okay just realized Hayley and Hunter are different people, thanks for the recap, always on point.

The whole Salley story was so stupid I muted

I wish BIP had challenges similar to Love Island, to 1. Stir the pot and relationships and 2. Give the Islanders something to do 😂

BIP has become unwatchable for me. I think social media plus producer manipulation have necessitated a complete re-tooling of the original concept. I keep thinking of all the great streaming shows I could be watching!

The beginning sketch with the luggage is gold 😂

I was hoping you would have a clip of Hailey's exit. "I have air conditioning" best line ever. I laughed so much.

I don't think I am liking Genevieve here! Looks very different from the girl I thought I knew!

I love how Bachelor production basically forces drama now by obviously putting in problematic ppl like Shenae, Aaron and his BFF, not knowing we DO NOT want to see them and let the drama happen organically

Ashley ,and Jared just need to go on a vacation not on my TV. Go away you aren't even a real successful story.

Production is the biggest bully of all.

I don’t think there should be so much shame around the idea of packing a vibrator (or even a waffle maker 😆) for a vacation 🤷‍♀️ and if you’re properly washing your sex toys, they are definitely shareable! That’s just sustainable consumption! lol

Producers seem to be stooping to new lows. If I could give them advice it would be : just bc you can doesn't mean you should.

I just wanna know how some of the contestants are literally spiraling when it’s only been TWO days lmfao

Bachelor Fantake!! I have a question for you, it would be interesting to hear your take on the status of the bachelor/ette franchise and how much longer it can last . I’m not sure about anyone else but I went from an avid fan who would watch whole seasons starting in 2016- 21 to literal disinterest watching a single episode (except for your vids, I will always support you!🥰 and your recaps are legendary!) but the franchise is heading into a state of disrepair and I wonder if you had any thoughts about this. I think it has a majority to do with casting, but would love to hear your thoughts and anyone else with a opinion about this:)

Jacob calling lace iconic this is Most I ever like him.

Why is everyone so critical in the comments? I was having such a fun time with all the bullshit! It's paradise, stop taking it so seriously

Victoria F knew the assignment.

Best episode so far! Felt like a ton happening I like unexpected friendships between shanae, Gen, and tedd ish exit. Tho I wish she stayed long enough to see if she could explore something with Rodney.

Sucks that Teddi left. I felt Rodney and her had the best potential to make it in and out of BIP. Maybe they will hook up outside BIP 🤞

I just want Michael A to find love. He deserves it

it's so funny, I just finished watching last night's episode, searched for bachelor fantake and his video was just uploaded! Perfect timing!

Every time I get down on myself for being single at 45, I remind myself that my red flags are almost nonexistent compared to these women’s and I feel a little better inside.

I don’t need to watch recap videos, but I do because I love your commentary and humor 😂 ❤

that whole thing about Sally was SO DUMB!! what were they thinking.. not even remotely funny and went on way too long!

Bip is way less entertaining now like everyone know each other before hands.

I love your recaps, I watch them before I watch the episodes! It's nice not getting swept up in the dramatic music and knowing what will happen lol Appreciate your hard work and hoping your having fun with this season!

OK am I the only annoy by Jill at this point she a lot ,and just really dramatic.

The entire Wells story was unnecessary lol .. I fast forwarded 😂

I JUST told my mom the new season is on and to watch it, before last nights episode. I really hope she didn’t take my advice.

This is only my second season of BIP but compared to last season, this one is just strangeeee. Last season I barely knew anyone because im new to Bachelor but I still loved it lol. This season I know 70% of the cast and im just confused because all of the “drama” just feels dumb and senseless. Genevieve is over dramatic and needs to relax, wtf with that Salley stunt, wtf with Teddi just ghosting 3 days in, and I can’t even look at Romeo or Jacob their both just odd. Hopefully things get better as the season progresses.

I've always said that the people coming on this show are responsible for knowing how much of a dumpster fire it is and that there's a good chance they'll look ridiculous, but I actually kinda feel bad for Salley. That was on a whole new level of cringe, they didn't have to do her like that.

Brandon was made for paradise the guy could fall love with a brick walls.

NOT Teddi acting like she's being forced into an arranged marriage 🙉😁😁

Am I the only one who can't stand the stupid forced bro chemistry between James and Aaron, and desperately wish they would just go away?? Like, enough already. They make me cringe so much that I wanna vommmm!!

Ugh I hate the seniority complex Aaron has

I felt so bad for Hunter.

It was so staged and fake. Anyone is going to have their suitcase locked and it is so wrong to go through someone's personal belongings. And why would anyone touch someone else's vibrator???

Your humor is undefeated 🤌🏾😆

At first I was like “did I click on the wrong video?” 😆😆😆

I was completely confused about Teddy. She could have went on that date to see if they clicked or not. Sometimes I think it's all the alcohol causing them to make bad decisions.

Now I need a recap of what’s happening on Twitter at the same time/after the show airs

I’ll miss Teddi. Love her and I think her leaving the way she did was badass, especially if it’s for the reasons that she hinted at on IG.

The Bachelor franchise has really jumped the shark now. That whole reenactment bit was pathetic.

Wait. Vibrators? I might have to actually start watching the show.

Why would producers want Salley to come back if she can’t decide whether or not she wants to be with her ex?

With all that ridiculousness, I love that you have Greg Brady a cameo.

Genevieve was a lot during these episodes. It was pretty annoying to watch haha

Until Victoria F kissed Johnny I thought Justin was vague about who he would pick...

OMG these women are horrible. Not only going through someone else’s belongings but just tossing their stuff on the ground? Are they toddlers? Why would anyone want this kind of person in their lives? It doesn’t matter if it’s a “joke,” it’s that this is how they choose to act on national tv. Imagine what they’d do away from the spotlight. This is a new low.

Aaron and Genevieve LITERALLY look like siblings, even twins possibly. I cannot ship it 😩

NGL, I don’t understand the Victoria F hate, there have been waaaaaay worse person on these shows. The examples from the show people use, don’t make sense to me. Just my opinion, not saying I’m her #1 fan but I don’t understand the hate

Just wanna say I appreciate all the effort you put into these videos. I hope you're doing well and staying healthy ❤

One of the funniest lines I've ever heard from any of these shows was Jakob's "Hong Kong is a strip club in Tijuana"!! No comedian could have set that up better!

I can't believe Romeo hit a "Jarret" on Jill....that would hurt me and she said it better than me

For all it's quirkiness, BIP is the better show. I hope Granny Smith sticks around and finds love. Love your use of pikachu.

This is my first season watching BIP and I'm so confused....it's only been a few days, why is everyone crying so much already?!

Kira was consoling Romeo only for him to choose Jill. Yikes.

I would like to see other love stories, I do NOT want to see Jared and Ashley I fast forward each time they pop up on my screen.

I’m fucking dead. The TSA clip playing then showing the girls just go through someone else’s bag is gold 😂

I think Genevieve is a little immature cuz she's spiraling out of control over someone she just met and now if she thinks her and Aaron are going to be an item she's got another thing coming and I think Teddy is a goofball for leaving the way she left that seems a bit childish she wasn't ready for bachelor in Paradise not a good fit for her was teddy embarrassed does she feel guilt for having feelings for two guys was she homesick I didn't understand what her problem was maybe something happened behind the scenes you know how producers can manipulate situations cuz she did not promote the show according to the blogs

“The raccoon gang” 😂🤣