Abusive Parents | Nouman Ali Khan 

USA?

AMEEN SIR I have protected my son with my life because of my abuse

Ameen

This is sooo deep! Thank you so much

I come from family where verbal abuse is seen normal and I don't wanna my children to hear what I heard from my parents

Ameen 🥰🥰😔😔

Yes and and so they can treat you well in your oldage

Narcissistic personalities live to see trauma in others under their finger because it gives them a sense of power, importance, pride & a great high...yes they feel contentment in ppls misery, disfunction, low self esteem, financial & social deprivation & even physical pain/ trauma. May Allah give them hidayat before its their time to return to The Almighty. Aameen ☝🏼

This is so accurate, I'm still in it & the worse part is that the world sees me as the culprit & them innocent, me as the transgressor & them the transgressed Allah Alem May Allah Almighty give us all hidayat & solve our worldly issues for us & keep us steadfast in our deen & give us jannatul firdous along with our deceased. Aameen.

Unfortunately, I have nightmares about my abusive father. He traumatised me.

My life is hell made by my parents

He’s not a mufti/scholar, he analyzes Quran and give darwa 👍

I’m in it

@@Muslim_Modeidc if he’s no mufti or scholar, i care that whatever hes saying is healing me also we are not sent in this world to be puppets of our parents. This is sad no one talks abt what a child goes through if he has abusive mother

Becoz some. Muftis maulanas are chutiya

@@sjssjks7983 well we can learn from our parents mistake and avoid it when raising our families

You defined my dad

Same bro i figured it out like dont get attached when they're being nice and don't get shocked when they are abusive expect nothing from them just be normal

@@ramlashahzad5077 thanks i need this

thats how i am

Calm and control your anger. How does your husband feel about you right now ? Hopefully, very much understanding ! Anyway, always stay positive and move ahead with your life. Live happy and generate happiness all around you. Don't stay stuck in the past life. If there is anything you can change right now then go ahead. Otherwise, focus on your loved ones; they need you and YOU need them. Read Quran Majid and Quranic stories. And always do Zikr and be grateful to Allah Subhanhu Wa 'Ta'la for your every blessing(s) in life.

If he abused you just walk away . it's halal

Yes exactly. A girl in our society is miserable. As she can't do anything or can't speak for her right . She is not allowed to go anywhere when parents are humiliating her . She is not supposed to have any respect or defend herself whe is getting accused of what she didn't did. The same I'm facing but where could i go or how could i supposed to speak when I'm getting disrespected and tortured mentally. ? ❓

Sometimes i think i would run from the house and stay in a rent house or travel the world as i wish but with frnds a frnd who deals with same mental torture they only understands me ...this is how i use to think girls who suffered same became best friends rent a house go to work earn money do there work by there own staying with girl best friends who understands us

After accepting it's better you find a way where you can focus on your career and use it as an excuse to leave toxic environment rather than praying for patience bcz no matter how tough you are, it is going to affect

May Allah give you strength and patience sister and create the best way out for you! Much much love to you sister ❤️❤️

Just get out of that situation. .nobody is going to help u...u have to help urself....my personal experience. ...

💯

So true... they don't feel bad after yelling, cursing and controlling. They think they are the parents, the controller, they are allowed to do everything

Absolutely right

i think it's because generational trauma. and i do strongly believe that our parents also suffer childhood trauma as we do hence their actions. does that make their actions not wrong? of course not. but let's just take a moment and think about the wars that their parents have gone through which can lead to ptsd and goes untreated (obviously). and then our parents born from that family with untreated ptsd, of course gonna have trauma also (and obviously untreated). and then.. there's us. lulz my dad personally is someone who's gone through wars, and so does his parents and their parents. not to mentioned my dad's parents are divorced. so God knows whatever it's that he's gone through and at that time where surviving is the most crucial thing to do.. sorry for ranting.

@@sarahnovella4971 don't be sorry that's your perspective and I absolutely respect that ya lot of people have trauma, survival issues in their past so they behave according to but not everyone, some people do exist that they just never ever doesn't care, realizing is something far beyond of question.

Absolutely beautiful, you're so brave and strong, your children are so lucky to have you. I

Your lucky you got out, I'm still suffering everyday it's unbearable,but I had enough I'm leaving.

​@@786Trustbroo I'm just so damn low recently bcz of them. I've nowhere to go or talk to about it. Oh god seriously feel so miserable...I can't even tell!!!😖😭😭 Did you successfully made it out?

Some of the worse people becomes parent, they beat, curse, leaves sequels in the child life forever and they expect to be given honor and to be taken care of, may Allah never gives anyone parents like this that I know of, that are the representation of kibr.

​@@parwanas5216Ameen

If you are mature enough then see the pattern to her behaviour. Don't talk back every time; that is RUDE. Talk calmly and respectfully. Give her space. She will come around okay !

@@drmonsurrahman9762 yes i’m mature enough to map and decide how toxic she is.. it’s been 5 years i have been treated unfairly

I feel you. Same here. Talking back either calmly or rudely or in any manner dosent change anything. Just keep praying to Allah to grant you a way out. To protect you from her fitna and seperate you at the best time and in the best way, and to help you heal. May Allah heal us all.

@@healheartandmind we’re on the same shoes. May Allah give us strength and stay

girl i also have really abusive parents i was always neglected and the least loved child my siblings don't even care about me now because of all the humiliation slandering... i have severe anxiety ptsd ... remember that Allah is testing u and it is temporary sometimes i can even think I'm gonna go to hell ... but i remember Allah is fair try to not talk back i used to do that but now i try to be calm and pray Allah wants u to be close to him ❤

Same, we can’t change our parents. The best we can do is being a good child. And good parents if we become one. Just learn from their mistakes and do better

As Salam Alaikum wa Rahmatullah wa barakatu my dear Muslim Brother, Yes parents abuse the Word of Allah Azza Wa Jal to get their own actions being pardoned"as they always mean just well especially by hurting and abusing their children. With due respect to your mother but she doesn't decide who goes to hell it is ALLAH AZZA WA JAL who does and no one else. ALLAH AZZA WA JAL is most forgiving and loves to forgive and HE S. W. T is At Tawwab and really brother hold on to the rope of ALLAH AZZA WA JAL and listen to Al Quran Al Karim and Makin Dua and be certain that no one decide but only ALLAH AZZA WA JAL. May ALLAH AZZA WA JAL grant you and everyone ease in all of their affairs and bless and forgive all of us and accept our Tawba and guide us all always to Suratil mustaqeem and bless us all always with Qalbe saleem And grant us all Jannat Al Firdaous Amin Ya Rabil Alamin wa alaikum Salam wa Rahmatullah wa barakatu

Neelam Jean is right. We all have to keep making dua for our parents. And also yes, Allah is the Only One to decide who goes into Hell Fire and who doesn’t.

Correct so I did exactly what they asked of me...today I'm considered a looser, lowlife, an embarrassment by their standards because I live a simple modest life. Standards change as time passes but Islam won't. #DeenOverDunyaForever

@@neelemjean5288 well said.

Ameeng

Aameen

Aameen aameen yarabbal aalameen

Ameen

Aameen

So seeking a counselor or going to the masjid for help is that easy?

I mean why should a victim need help why not the abusier

You have allah you do not need anyone else.

Religion ≠ culture

''parents r always right no matter what''

​@@_--Idk--_ not always *NOT ALWAYS*

@@_--Idk--_ brother you don't have abusive parents , you should better shut up

MashaAllah, sister. Here is your brother in Islam. And your story is inspirational! Indeed, this bond knows no breaking (of course, if a person holds onto it) May Allah SWT forgive our sins, guide and soften our hearts, make us more content with our life and more patient towards our parents (even if it's extremely hard sometimes) so that we don't fall into the shaytan's trap. And, of course, may Allah SWT soften and guide the parents hearts, and make them understand that they might not always be right, as they think. Because we all will face The Almighty, and hopefully we won't be among the wrongdoers. Ameen! Wishing everyone to be successful in this world and most imortantly in the Hereafter. Salam Aleikum!🙏🏼

Ameen ❤️...u see sister it's cuz the traumas that our parents faced in their lifetime they thought was normal or couldn't deal with it so they try to project it on their spouse, children or siblings.... know that you are not like them in their ways and stop this cycle of generation trauma before it affects your childrens wellbeing ✨

@@eshanaz8234 indeed sister, that's exactly it, the oblivion to it all. And it's worse knowing the detrimental effects of this and still continuing to project it, out of meer habit, or simply something we've been acclimated to. Please remember me in your duas, as I'd do so for you, and reminders like these are so vital for the those with enough consciousness and willingness to make those changes. Amen❤

@@Sonya-Zidane Ameen ❤️✨

Bro it cannot happen they have control over everything they can make or break your life

I will never love myself because of how my mom treated me as a teenager and young adult. I struggle being happy and loving myself. I just can’t do it. I am 30+ it’s one of the most difficult things I face. And till this day my mom manipulates, is narcisstic and emotionally destroys me.

💯

don't worry ,u'r not alone, and ik ...u can configure this.

This Ayah doesn't just mean daily prayers. It means complete surrender to Allah Almighty's Words. It means following HIS commands down to the tee. That is what 'prayed' means here

@@iammistergreen It means the daily prayers if God wanted to use in this is verse the word "surrend" he would have said it. I can't believe we are discussing the importance of the daily prayers!

Yeah, you can't just go away bc you're dependable on them or you just can't bc they'll cut you out of their way.

Allah creates a way out for everyone, my friend! Keep praying to Him; and also, see if you can get a job while studying; maybe save up to move out. You can also save up from your allowances if you’re given any.

“Allah doesn’t burden a soul more than it can bare”. Also don’t use that GD word

First u on here and cursin god staghfAllah

@@user-gn5mh2uu5x ‘astagfirullah’

Allah loves us

❤️

But Sir if they cut you off even when u r innocent

Staying.away from them is necessary if they are abusive and to keep the communications open with clear boundaries.

It is very difficult especially when they are treating you like garbage

Isn't that a contradiction of the video?

Don't worry about severing family ties yourself, controlling parents will do it for you. My parents are Alhamdulillah waaay better than those types. But I have seen parents misusing and abusing their children, for no good reason. And if Allah forbid, they try to stand up for themselves once, the parents disown them. Have seen it a couple of times actually. Still severing family ties is not okay. But you should remove yourself from their company. It's a fine line. But I have seen it happen.

May Allah help you sister😢😢

Sometimes can be a lot of times for me... Hold on to the good, don't let it destroy you☝🏽🌌💖💫

@@bbdn5123 Righteous, Thank You For That.

👋🏼✌🏽🖖🏽Note to self always. You're very welcome. Just take one day/moment at your time. Be kind and loving to yourself first. You know what's good for you truthfully. Sounds easy I know, but coming from the broken of the brokenness is very hard. So we should give ourselves credit for being here in this timeless continuum. When the dark clouds have passed, there's so much light 💓💞🤲🏻

@@bbdn5123 Well I Wholeheartedly, Understand That. It Gets A Bit Tough For At Times, Hey I have A question Hopefully You Can Answer. What Did you Do When People Deliberately Go Out Of Their Way To Get In Your Way To Have You Become Reactive? Like It's Happening To Me Now?

💔

May Allah bless you immensely and make it easy for you, In Shaa Allah! ❤️✨

Parents are retarded who abuse