Accept What You Can't Change and Stop Complaining 

I love what you said “ complaining about the situation just makes you reinvest in all the crap, bringing it into your current moment and ruining your present moment” I don’t want to do that anymore. God please help me

It's best to focus on something better coming along and move on. Sometimes I don't want to talk about it. The situation can only get worse.

Thank you for this ❤

If you're not getting through to someone, first let them get through to you. The way to the mind goes through the heart. To turn the heart, you need to apply empathy and compassion, and particularly tolerance. When you give the feeling of being understood, you will open up something good. The value I see in you is the value you see in me. Effective teaching is more about turning hearts than filling minds. What's within us is in fact what's between us. We are all looking constantly for ways to fit ourselves in. Everybody needs to feel indispensable somewhere. Feeling known and tolerated is what we can give to others. Where there is lots of giving, there is lots of receiving. When I build you, my life becomes better. Life is a group activity.

7 month later, I complain to everyone everyday all day, to everyone.. I even call warmlinea, crisis lines,.etc.. Non stop, even here on social media.. I foolishly!, retired from my best job ever, it was a huge part of my life. I tried desperately to return, and missed that opportunity also !! I was so stupid!,.. and I regret it SO much... I've lost my sanity, got anxiety, stress and...... I got depression. I cannot get over it.

Thank you! I needed this in my life so badly. So many things would enrage, frustrate, and make me feel powerless/helpless. I used to complain about so many things. I didn't have the tools to deal with all the things I wanted to change but couldn't.

The advice presented here is patently true, and suffices for some. Unfortunately, it’s a bit like telling a person with OCD to “just stop it.” Jiddu Krishnamurti discusses the “burden of anxiety” a bit more deeply and eloquently, and is worth reading.

Common sense, yet so helpful in the way he states it. Sometimes we need to be told what we already know.

Hi I am 2x stroke survivor watch your vid and help me enlightened my current situation.

Thank Dr. Jacobson, I always appreciate listening to your insightful recognition of all our stuff. Wow great man thank you for taking your time to speak to everyone. TY

Everytime i watch this it helps me accept things that i can't change and it helps my mentality during this time

Thanks a million for the great free help.

Hell no, I shall never stop complaining. My favourite hobby.

This deserves millions of view... Thanks doc

Thanks for reminding me.I did this already ."Serenity Prayer".and I need to have the boldness to stop complaining so much..I do this about 5% of the time..Aaaah, reminder, reminder..

Excellent Video

Thank you very much for your advice!! I've been at a crossroad for the last couple of weeks and your wise words make sense to me! I really cannot fight a system I will try but I have accept the consequences of my actions.

I know this sounds silly but I happen to be a HUGE Houston Rockets (been one since 2012) fan and CP3 fan and they are about to lose the series in the playoffs and its been eating me alive. Just happened to stumble upon this gem. Thank you for the advice, helps a lot!!!!!

Amennn 💗

I wish I could make this fit my grief over the loss of my parents but I can't, even just "the flow" of life with acceptance is very difficult and painful. I know that's a completely different thing than what this video is really talking about (and as a trained psychologist I am well aware of the different types of grief, healthy and unhealthy grief, grief processes, expressions, etc., but I can't make any of that make sense when it comes to myself, either). It's the "missing them," despite acknowledging and accepting that my parents are not coming back from the dead, and I think a lot of it is the fact that while I believe they're spiritually around me and that I'll see them again in some form or another, the 3D me is just not very comfortable or happy with being in this incarnation without them even though it's the natural progression of things, whether it happened earlier in life (my 30's, for me) or when they were elderly and it was more "expected." It's just a very strange loss experience for me, compared to the other loss experiences I've had... Love what you've said here, though - makes me more consciously aware of how my thought processes, even subconscious ones, impact my experiences.

Thank you.

I needed this video. Thank you.

I speak from experience. Comlaining makes things more complex. We should stop acting as victims and look for solutions instead. After all, "what is meant is meant "

I'm trying to accept bad things happens and the end of everything

It's hard but i kno i should.. And keep move on. I kno i deserve to get better.

I really appreciate your approach! Ty!

Thank you so much!

Instead of accepting what we can't change it's time to start changing what we can't accept.

Wow. That is very good advice.

Great video, but without God, who's "granting" the power to change? Just a thought.

Thank you so much 😊

It is hard to change. I lost all my friends because I am a horrible person. They all hate me because of my decisions. I hate myself. And just want everything to go back how it was. I just can't change. It's so hard.

This is a excellent video. I’m going through a tough time and this is great advice, thank you

Well i have a huge problem with just accepting things, it makes me resentful and in the moment, i know its bad but i still end up complaining. I have this internal conflict to accept or change. In the meantime, i just complain.

When you accept what you can't change life moves in a more positive direction

Thank you man

Peace be with you

The regrets of inaction are deeper and more painful than the regrets of something you did. This video sums up good advice but it doesn’t address the larger question, what does it say about me that I chose the path I did that doesn’t line up with my values or who I think I am.

i cant change the ungratefullness of my kids..when i ask the question " hows your day " its ALWAYS some kind of negative remark they give..they are SO TOXIC, i just dont get it..i dont even bother asking them anything anymore :(

Interesting! Sounds like I need to work on a lot. been dealing with stomach issues for a long time and in the back of my mind I can't accept it really. tried everything but i guess that makes me more stressed and makes the problem worse. Any practical tips for letting go?

some people just can't accept what already happened and they just complain about it

Great piece of advice....

I think most pp who complain want to see positive changes, for all concerned, it is knowing (WHEN) to stop when you realize it's not working or worst actually working against you - that's the trick. This was lost on me as I continued on wishful thinking complaining despite evidence to the contrary -no effect. But it's not tt straightforward when/how to stop especially it's a vital space/ environment you unable to avoid but you (also) cannot put up with current toxic pp/situation by just accepting it as your lot. It's not that easy doc, when you have to put up in silence (affects health too, suppression) - but continued complaining is also very draining agreed, also affects health. Both methods seem to take toll on one's health my reckoning. That's why, (physically) removing yourself from toxic env/set up/situation/city/country need be is Best remedy I can think of - despite draconian. But how practicable are these to most. I'm no medical but putting up with abusive/toxic pp situation is akin to being frozen in the (fright) stage of the fight or flight continuum yeah??. Errr, doesn't seem like very healthy/wholesome state to be stuck in - no matter how enlightened coping method/philosophy/spirituality etc : ie Serenity prayer/others. I suspect I have been stuck in this fright stage for over 17yrs dealing with Toxic Train Stations environment in my country, a conundrum I find Very hard to extricate from as it is an essential (Mrt train) services I need rely on day in day out); - So I feel stuck/trapped! in this toxic set up. I also have host of other medicals to contend with on top on this); -Tired Singaporean

Yeah easier said than done pal

I literally complain about things I have absolutely no control over and it drives me crazy. I am so jealous and immature about the dumbest things!

You rock!:)

Random: video idea. Could you explain personality types?

Acceptance can be very dangerous around a psychopathic dark triad malignant narcissist with antisocial personality disorder

I am afraid that I accept my asthma I will not look for a treatment to get rid of it

now im crying even more- ha

my son is negitive, refuses to accept any suggestions he just wants to put his negitive energy on me how can i cut him off .

Its my dark circles hollows i hate them they def ruin my quality of life are u tired have you slept 24/7 i'm a male btw. But i cant do anyrhing about it unfortunately fillers? I'm too young can't afford them concealer yh right.

how do i accept shii in a relationship though . If they doing shii ion tolerate and i tell them about it over & over & over and they continue to do the same shii . Do i accept it for what it is ?

Tapos na ung challenge na iyun. May iba lang challenge.

Aceept it

Good Advice Ever

Complainers seriously get me down. I just don't get it.

The steeple fingers come up on the screenshot. Did you want that? I think informed people may be put off.

thanks very helpful but what if your like me who was in an extreme situation and I developed a severe intestinal disease and still can't find another job in this crappy econ?

No

😨😠😂