Address This Mess: ‘My Best Friend Always Wants My Man’ 

it's the "LOOK BITCH..." for me. lmao

I’m howling at “Paul, Mitchell, Michael, Doug, and Felix.”

Adrienne is SPOT ON. I’ve been there. I had a friend like that in college. Lord knows, I thought this friend had more than me in every area, but it still wasn’t enough. I came from a poor family. I received financial aid and it still wasn’t enough so I slept wherever I could but mostly at her place that her parents paid for and wrote annual tuition checks in full. Like Adrienne said, I felt indebted in many ways. Every guy I liked my friend would flirt with. It hurt so badly. I NEVER competed with her, not that I couldn’t but I didn’t want to. I always believed God made all of us special in our own ways and what’s meant for you is for YOU. Anyways, fast forward it’s been two decades. I left that friend years ago. People rarely change. And somethings you shouldn’t have to tell or teach a grown adult! Besides, “friends” like that are manipulative enough to make it seem like you’re insecure and seeing things that’s not there or they’ll say they’ll do better which means they’ll only get better doing it behind your back. Run! Will I always be grateful for that friend’s help? Yes! But, like Adrienne points out: some people helping you isn’t really for you or about you; it’s for themselves. It makes them feel needed, better, and valued. Every time I was doing well and soaring, my friend called and came around less or not at all. That “friendship” was a blessing because I now know what a friendship is NOT suppose to feel like. Knowing and feeling are two different things. I had to experience both.

I agree with Adrienne. Please don't get in the habit of collecting red flags with people that you know. This lady wrote in because in the past her intuition was giving her all kinds of signals that something isn't right with this friend and now she's trying everything in her power to find a reason dismiss what her gut is telling her. Hopefully, she takes the fact that she even had to write this letter as confirmation that she needs to end this "friendship".

Adrienne stole the words out of my head. That girl is mean to her friend and feels like a saviour. We know her type that like to keep you low and they want to be the center of attention.

The sitting on the lap was the straw that broke the camels back. I would NEVER. Obviously this friend has issues and is inappropriate

I agree with Adrienne! However, also take it as a sign that those weren’t the right men for you because they should be checking the friend too!

Lonnie and Adrian's analysis could be the reason why these things are happening. But I believe also that her friend might think she is better than her. In other words she's saying that if this guy likes my friend who I know is not better looking than me then he's going to definitely fall in love with me. She's using the friend as bait to get guys

Adrienne was right but tbh if I had a friend like this I wouldn't be scared to have a talk. We either gonna talk like adults and you stop or we can end our friendship.

She was never your friend because she intentionally do it to hurt you. Cut her off. My ex best friend did the exact same thing to me and had the audacity to try to make me look like the bad guy . Cut her off because she is showing you over and over that she does not value your friendship.

Throw that backstabbing friend in the 🗑️

Helping someone out doesn't give you the right to be an @$$hole to them later. If someone is always pursuing your (potential) "significant others", that someone needs to become an insignificant part of your life

That ain't your friend. Just weirdo energy, kick that shady heffa out of your life.

Adrienne is 100% right!

I had this problem. When the next guy came I never told her but now we ain’t even friends oh well

Loni and Adrienne had good points with this

I understand this 1000%! You feel indebted when a close friend has helped you out. Although you repay them, you still feel like it's never enough. So you look the other way if they say or do something sly. The friend knows what they are doing and it's a form of manipulation. This loop will never end until you wake up and realize you don't owe them anything.

But then people want to debate why some friends shouldn't be allowed to stay overnight.

I screamnt when Loni said the friend is in love with her 😭

I'm loving Lonnie's stylist this season.

When Loni said "Look bitch" it took me out! Detroit Debbie came out (the day ones know)!!!Good thing nobody wants James but her.

It seems like the friend gets off on "taking" men from her and it's a game for her. She is the type the is only interested in men that someone else is interested in.

That is a HATER. You best friend should want wants best for you instead of looking at you with jealous and envious eyes. Dump her!

Loni had me cracking up😂😂😂

People just love to deal with the BS. Y’all don’t need to have these types of friendship. No need

These are what they call friends in need and never in success. Some friends think they are better and so they are there when things are bad but cant stand when things go well for you. Coming when things are bad gives them a chance to feel better.

I had a friend like this & didn't realize it until our friendship finally ended. Chicks like this in the video just simply love attention all on them. They are deeply insecure & feel incredibly low when attention isn't on them so they'll do anything to get it. Even if that means them being deceitful & pure selfish. You can't keep people like that in your life. Cut em off

This girl done named a whole track list of dudes… red flag ! You need to cut that friend off… cuz why does she always seem to be interested in the guys u date?! Seems suspiciousss!!! Jealous maybe ? Maybe even ruins ur moments on purpose to keep u to herself If Ykw I mean ! I just I can’t take people that do stuff like that ! Be happy for me instead of trying to infiltrate on my happiness

I had the same problem, my husband (boyfriend) at that time told me she kissed him while he was playing the piano. I immediately cut that friendship off and informed her I noticed she did it with every man that came around but, for her to do it to my boyfriend was time to cut off our friendship and return my handbags she borrowed. Why is it some women assume every man likes them for some reason. Had we remained friends I would never be able to trust her around him. I never interacted with her again plus she always liked to borrow my things.

indebted or not...a true friendship will have the courage and respect to say exactly what Loni said.... the friend's reaction is what will determine whether you stay or not.

This is not your friend! Friends don't do that! There is a line that friends don't cross! Indebted my foot! I don't know what kinds of people these people are dealing with!

I agree with loni and Adrienne. Frenemies mix the good with the bad to confuse you and keep you stuck in the friendship

Exactly why you don't bring everyone around your man that goes for friends and family 💯

Adrienne hit the nail on the head. Frenemy indeed.

Adrienne ran this yasss 👌🏾👌🏾👍🏽

Garcelle is always ready with her "its a doozy" hahaha i love it

I Agree with Adrienne and I don't think her "friend doesn't like seeing her happy and thriving".

Her friend is disrespectful period

Lonnie you might be right. She want her friend to herself

I am sorry but any woman who goes after your man is NOT your friend! We have to stop making up words like ‘frienemy’ to excuse disrespectful and unacceptable behavior. She is either a friend or an enemy. You can’t be both. When someone is always making you fail or feel bad about yourself then flips the switch is abusive. Plain and simple.

I feel like that "friend" has a superiority complex over her friend. She helps out because she wants you in that spot beneath her. So when you have a boyfriend she needs that attention from him to prove to herself she's better than you. Dump that "friend" she never really liked you. She just wants you around to make herself feel better.

I agree with Loni “she in love with her “

When I first started watching, to me it sounded like a power abuse. The friend feels like she can do whatever she wants because she was there for her in her lowest moments. But that is manipulative and you cannot use your good deeds towards a person to excuse bad/inappropriate behavior. When she has this conversation, I hope she doesn’t allow her friend to use those things against her. Like say hey I know you have done some amazing things for me and I am so grateful, but this here is unacceptable and cannot happen anymore. It’s called boundaries, and if her friend can’t respect them then that’s a sign the relationship has come to an end.

I would end the "friendship"....PERIOD

Well said Adrienne!!!

I’m here with Lonnie! Don’t touch my man!!

The Real should make a segment where they discuss what happened to these people that send the letters

Loni you are so right! That's exactly what I thought... she's blocking the men because she does not want her friend to have anyone else but her.... she's obsessed with her friend so she's pretending to be all over the guys she meet.

Loni is glowing and ain’t neva lied

The moment I see a friend of mine going after my man you not a frenemy you a opp

I have a cousin that did some foul stuff like that. She lost her virginity to my boyfriend at the time after we broke up( I lost my virginity to him too). Then she tried to get with my first love years after me and him broke up he told me because we're still friends. Then she was messing around with this dude I was messing with. Then the bish turned around and had a baby with her lil sisters ex boyfriend. Smh🤦🏾‍♀️ I can't.

I’m loving Garcelle’s makeup, hair, nails, and outfit ‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥

It's Adrienne saying "Lord" in the background for me.

And y’all had so much to say about Kierra sheard-Kelly when she made that comment. THIS IS WHYYYYY!!!!

These were not the right guys for her, as they probably would have messed with her SO CALLED FRIEND!

That's NOT her friend. Your best friend would never want your man! its like wanting your sister's man.

Loni that’s definitely a plot twist 😂😂😂

Never ever go after a person that your bestie/sister/brother likes. It’s not worth it. It doesn’t make you look good, it makes you look desperate.

The guys she dates are trash too because they keep falling for the friends moves

A real friend doesn't randomly treat you well and then proceeds to mess into your love life and make moves on the guys you like. I had a 'friend' like that when I was a teen. She made it look like she cheered for me on everything, even with the boy I was in love back then. I didn't tell her I like him, she knew because he was really flirty with me and she noticed my reactions. She said she was going to help me, but instead, when we were in group at the pool she would climb on his back and caress his hair and I was soooo annoyed. He didn't date her, he didn't date me either, but she also stole my best friend by inviting her places and always leaving me behind and she did the same with the whole group of friends. And I was almost left alone because of her, so be careful with this type of people. If they are suuuper nice to you but at the same time they hurt you, that ain't a friendship...

This reminds me of when Jeannie was saying a friend of hers asked her to tone it down so she can get a word in and peruse the guy she like. Jeannie’s conclusion was she was going to dim her shine for anyone. However, everyone is not an extrovert or flirt and it’s courteous to try to include others (especially your friend) and make space for others to interact. Not everyone is going to want to battle with you trying to dominate the conversation or cutting everyone off.

She is not her friend. She gave her a place to live because she enjoyed feeling like her friend was needy and in pain. She is listening to her because she is enjoying her misery.

First of all. She is NOT your friend. Yes she helped you in BAD times...but Friends want your happiness and flirting or trying to STEAL your man is not going to make you happy. Tell her you don't appreciate her flirting and Distance yourself until she finds a "boyfriend" of her own!

Lol - I love Loni! She keeps it all the way real. 😂❤️

Adrienne is right. I think this is the typical situation of where people are uncomfortable with putting boundaries in place with friends / family because of the good they've done for them. Just because someone does good for you doesn't mean you are at their mercy of disrespect. She should have the conversation first, before cutting her friend off because clearly she's never raised that this was an issue.

I disagree with the gay comment. The woman is just jealous and insecure about herself. She’s definitely sleep with her friend’s man if given the opportunity

I love Adrienne‘s outfit 👌🇨🇦

I'm with Adrienne

Talk to Mrs Sheard. Lol.

I have had a Loni situation, when the person is obsessed..... I would slowly remove myself if not Fast!!!

This girl just needs to end this "friendship" with her. Loni had a good point. Ade had a good point too. I agree with ade 100% friendship over

Slap her 🤷🏾‍♀️ She not your friend

Listen. Sorry but I am NOT even gonna have a conversation with this friend after realizing that she's messy. I would just make my exit and she won't even know because that is just too much disrespect from "a friend"...She knows too well what she been doing. So bit*h, bye!

BOI that's what I thought. Loni said exactly what I was thinking. Sis probably has a thing for her friend, this is too random.

I 100 percent agree with Adrienne! I don’t care what rock bottom she helped with. She’s giving you several red flags let her go!

I think Loni is right.

I had a friend like this and I just told her plainly (after years) how I felt. She continued and I let her know I would not be inviting her again and why. She eventually stopped and started doing it to another friend 🤷🏾‍♀️

Loni looks good. I would Never see it her way though. WOW! Adrienne is Right- I would get rid of that frenemy ASAP!

I can't say how is handle this on here. Just know that I don't play those types of games.

Hello arizona Tucson !!! Is here near my phoenix area coty 2 hours away I’m from phoenix cactuses 🌵

2:31 DING DING DING!

Boy oh Boy I thought and then Lonnie said it lol.

Loni Loni LONI!!! AND AD!!!!! hit it right on the head. she doesn’t want to see her with anyone and knows she not going anywhere bc she’s been so supportive to her and it happened before with other men. I wonder if it’s the same with other friends as well… she has to be in love with her.

Lonis look is 🤩🤩🤩 she working it

The girl is doing this because she knows you won’t address this issues because she was there for you when no one was there. That’s doesn’t make her entitled to be in you relationships or potential ones. Leave her ass and say thank you

Nobody cleans up a mess like Ms. Loni and bonus adds a plot twist. Nobody's breaking her stride.

Loni hit the nail on the head!!!!!

I am with Loni on her friend being in love with her

Cut off. I used to ignore so many red flags because I had the mentality "I don't see her doing that". You can never trust people and it's always best to keep them at arms length.

Loni dropping the plot twist welp. I just wouldn't discuss or introduce this frenemy to any man I'm dating.

Leave the friend.

Real friends do not keep tabs on the good things they've done to use it against you. You should always feel comfortable enough to have a conversation about when they are hurting you without that fear that they'll bring up something they did for you in the past. It's all about how you say it. But honestly a friend like that is not someone I would fight to keep around. Even if the guy your with doesn't reciprocate, you don't want to have that feeling of constantly looking over your shoulder when it comes to that one person. It's not fun and it's unnecessary stress. Some women use other women as target practices for their egos. They love to prove to that whatever guy their "friends" like will like them more so they go out of their way to garner attention from them. Even if they're not physically attracted to them like that.

I would end the friendship with this cousin Faith from Soul Food girl. She's not a friend at all. I'm with Adrienne 1,000%

If me and you are attracted to the same "type" of men, we can't be friends🙅🏾‍♀️ had this rule since high school and it has worked out great for me 👍

Adrienne and her husband should have a pod cast

The ladies are all dressed up so beautiful and professional ❤️🇨🇦

Awe naw ole girl with the short hair a snake too. Talking bout’ early bird gets the worm my ass. I had a old best friend like that. It all stems from jealousy & insecurity. Continue to be confident in who you are and true to who you are Leona while ole girl figuring herself out. Be a solid individual, carma ain’t not joke. You reap what you sew. People be knowing what their doing. They just want some attention too. But she definitely is not your best friend. Gotta let her go, can’t even trust her as a friend. Ain’t no talking, we too grown. A snake is a snake.

1st_We couldn't be friends... she's not trustworthy. 2nd_She MUST choose better men. A man that really liked respected loved her would not even allow it!

She also needs to stop introducing this 'friend' to her potential partners so soon!

I love Adrienne !!!