Advice for New Systems 

DID system here.. just over 2yrs awareness and diagnosis and still in denial every day except random moments. Awareness of the others has improved slightly but still have day to day amnesia. Thankyou for this! It is hard and overwhelming but I had my first “omg this is kinda ok” moment last week when I got upset and someone came in and dealt with the situation but I can’t remember it like a hazy dream. Felt nice like I had an inside buddy. Thanku for the tips. Just love your videos!

As a new system (I assume I’m host rn…) I’m constantly going through weird things where I feel like I’m forcing an alter’s self instead of letting them come forward and that instead of them actually being forward, I’m pretending to be them (????) and that they’re hanging out the back getting offended that I’m faking 😅 it’s so confusing and my brain is constantly trying to invalidate itself 😵‍💫

I have a great new therapist who specializes in trauma. I don't feel comfortable bringing up OSDD or DID specifically to him, but we're pretty certain that we have something beyond cPTSD. When I brought it up with my last therapist, she felt very dismissive which was hard. My handwriting changes, my slang completely changes, my skills change pretty drastically. It's pretty terrifying, though. I've tried to journal but it feels too vulnerable to have anything clearly visible that directly points to being a system so I'm just sort of generally inviting headmates to reveal themselves. I had tried to write things down, but I then ended up trying to force an understanding of each alter and force them into the roles I need to have filled and that just doesn't work.

Currently trying to come to grips with being plural, as far as myself and my headmate know we are the only two. I don't know if my headmate is being honest with me or not, but I've decided to trust my headmate. My headmate hates the term alter, so I call my headmate, a headmate. Getting along with my headmate is difficult, my headmate is exceptionally suspicious and distrustful of my lover, despite how accepting they have been of my headmate. I don't know how to validate my headmate's concerns while also reassuring them of my lover's intentions and behavior. This video came to me at the right time, I want to keep trying to connect with my headmate, my headmate has done so much for me and I need to repay them somehow. Thank you

Questioning system here. Our therapist thinks we are plural and says she's seen our different "personality states", but we don't have a diagnostic label since she doesn't like those (she's also a psychiatrist). But we keep telling ourselves that she's wrong and doesn't know anything since she sometimes says things we don't agree with aaaaa this is so difficult :( I've (host) been looking at the diagnosis p-did and wondered if that could be it, but nobody seems to talk about it so it's hard for me to truly "grasp" Anyway, I'm happy to have found your channel! Hope you're all well 💖

You are a very lovely person. All of you. I’m only five weeks into my ‘awakening’ and I’m scared crapless.

currently, its been 2 months and 3 days since i noticed i had alters and boy has it been stressful 😭 ive told a few online friends but only my immediate family irl, although ive told them the bare minimum - i genuinely keep thinking that im faking and that my trauma wasn't bad enough to cause it which was why i was scared to tell them. this video gave me a lot of comfort, so once again tysm ❤️❗

We did a diagnostic for several months through therapy and my therapist came to the conclusion that I have a dissociative disorder in line with osdd but has warned me of the possible damage that getting an official diagnosis can be when im doing child custody battles, so im just going with general ddnos or osdd, in therapy and not on paper. I hope one day it wont be so stigmatized to simply be a traumatized person doing their best.

Well, diagnosis process can help if the conclusion is "no". I'll work on that soon. I find very warming the way you speak. How much validation... Thank you. Even if it's BPD, if we experience ourselves as different individuals, our experience should be as valid, because that's what's all about: inner experience and working through it to feel better in the world.

at least 5 people are writing this, no ones fully fronting so not sure how coherent it will be but its been wild learning this about ourselves. our host thought we were characters for years and we all just sort of gaslit ourselves into believing we 'created ourselves on powerpoint', even though we were already there, the host just wrote down our personalities and what we looked like. its equal parts scary and cool, cool because my 'fictional characters' i(speaking as host) invented are real entire people and i've been able to meet them and get to know them properly without trying to cram them into a narrative for a comic book. scary cause none of us are in full control of our life, and we don't know who all of us are yet. there's also the whole 'acknowledging that our childhood was traumatic' thing thats kind of hard to come to terms with, although looking back there was always underlying trauma. a few of our close friends know, no one else cause we're scared of getting accused of faking because we already have day to day doubt in the back of our minds. although, some people might have an idea cause before we figured out it was probably osdd 1b we'd go around telling people 'the character im thinking about most influences my personality' and 'sometimes i feel like im my characters but i know thats just delulu' sorry for waffling this much, this is the first time we've posted about us online, we've only fully known for 2 weeks.

thank you so much for this. ive been wondering if im part of a system for basically almost over a year now and while i still dont really know it was really nice to hear you say that its okay if its overwhelming, thank you!

i'm just so scared that i'm making it up or that i'm going insane that whenever i start to communicate because i'm dissociating i end up getting really scared and anxious and then i stop dissociating and the conversation stops. the thing is that when the conversation is happening i'm not really realizing it, i'm too dissociated and i can't catch the thoughts and remember them. so i get fragments and pieces before i stop dissociating and then i end up forgetting them anyways. i can't find help, they're all so expensive. i'm going to try a free clinic but i feel they won't understand me.

Thank you for this! I'm struggling a lot, like a lot, with realising I might not be the only one in this body. That I might not be able to live a "normal" life. It's definitely not easier bc I'm in an anxiety episode and have had a similar experience last fall and that time everything went away after taking anti-psychotics for like a week. Now I'm off the anti-deps I had last time when I took the anti-psychotics and let's just say the a-ps aren't working the same. So hard having gone 6 months thinking everything was "okay" and now having immense anxiety/intrusive thoughts + continuing experiences of (what I suppose is) co-fronting/switching (where me, host?, is still aware of whats going on. I just want "my" life back, my family, my friendships. But I'm realising maybe it has never been just "my" life. I can barely eat and the past week have just been depending on my parents (I/body am 16) still think this is just anxiety and not smth like osdd. I'm aware this isn't a venting space just needed to get everything off my chest.

As someone with one alter (that I know of) I felt very seen. I haven't heard anyone really say that before, because most people have an average at least 4 alters from what I've seen, so thank you :) It also felt very nice to hear the denial stuff. I'm 4 months into knowing about my OSDD, and it's still a pretty heavy thing I'm going through. But what you said about that, I definitely needed to hear it.

Thank you for this, I am still new at this and I'm looking for as much information as I can. Even though I was made aware I was a system back in September of 2023 but due to a trauma incedent directly after that ( related to who I first confided that I was system with) we had supreessed doing anything about it it for months (because I until I was able to talk with the people I'm with now. Thankfully all doubts about how they would react have been unnecessary, but I'm making up for lost time. Still new to identifying who's who but I can say thank you from the Symphony System ❤

thank you so much for this video, uncovers the different parts of me has meant working through the barrier of shame, self loathing and guilt. Inital denial and shame of my parts and initial guilt for expressing my true self even when i know there are a lot of people who would rather we remain in shame and hide

Amazing video, we’ve known for almost 2 years now, but this video still hit home. It was so comforting, thank you ❤️

TW venting about medical stuff, honestly no one read this. I have been trying just to get a doctor to acknowledge well any of my mental health issues really, I’m too good at acting the way I act at work, hiding any weirdness, and I can’t take that mask off for therapists. I can tell them all the symptoms that I have and they will look at me and say “But you’re so self aware and can meet my eye, you therefore have nothing wrong with you. Except maybe something we can medicate, let’s medicate at random instead of doing therapeutic treatment”. Maybe I really am just making it all up and trying to push someone to believe I struggle is just seeking attention, idk. I’ll probably never know if I have anything that needs an actual diagnosis because no one wants to see me for more than the three sessions it takes for them to decide I’m just dramatic and stupid and making stuff up.

I'm only halfway through this video, and I already feel more seen than I have in years. I will check out all the videos you are referring to. I am desperate for answers to all the questions I have about myself and my people. THANK YOU 😭

Questioning system. I've had 3 periods of awareness of my headmates, but because of denial I forced them back 2 times. This is my third time and I'm 2 months into discovery. I'm not hiding it anymore because I want to learn. Even now I'm thinking that I'm faking because of the lack of embarrassment and discovering nearly 6 of them in the span of a single week.

Thanks for this video, it means a lot to see someone caring so much. It's quite relieving to know that the denial doesn't really go away, because it was a big factor that has been stopping me accepting it all. Everything feels new and confusing, but I feel a lot better equipped to deal with whatever's thrown at me because I can see that you care, and that people will care, and it's a weight off my shoulders to be validated like this, so again, thank you

Love these videos! Awesome advise, I have real trouble to contact the others cause they say I'm not ready and I don't really know what to do cause I cant talk to them 🙃 love love love these advise ♡ thanks ♡

Thank you so much for this video. I had learned that I might have DID around November or December of 2023 and Im still dealing with a lot. I have been switching pretty much everyday, at least twice a day, and it is really scary. One of my biggest fears is losing control of myself, so it's really hard to fully accept this about my... well.. I guess ourselves. Im really happy to have hesrd your words. It really does mean a lot. Thank you guys for all that you do. - Buster 💜

This was an extremely comforting video to watch ❤ thank you!

Holy shit, this was exactly what I needed to hear at this point, ty!

Im now aware that i am a system. but im fighting tooth and nail against that, this is the worst denial ive ever had about something and its tearing me apart. i wanted to leave a long comment about my experiences- - but im choosing not to.

hi :) i’m a member of the kirby system! i’m the core and have an attachment to kirby. im autistic and probably autigenic considering i have a system to help me cope with this

I'm not sure where I fit on the dissociative spectrum, but I definitely dissociate and at the very least have a very fragmented personality. I have a question to ask others here: has anyone else experienced the loss of a team member after starting on a high does of antidepressants? I am seriously missing one of my team who I used to rely on for so much of my ability to blend into the "normies" world. I don’t know what's happened and I feel so much confusion and grief.

learning about it... just became aware a few weeks ago

Hello. Thank you for sharing this video. I have DID too. Good advice!

Thank you.

ive been questioning whether i have OSDD, since i have a lot of dissociation and memory issues, plus other little things that hint to being plural. I'm not at all confident yet, but my partner (who has diagnosed DID) is pretty sure i have DID or OSDD (they think probably DID) and i very much trust their judgement. so yeah, trying to figure that out. going to try to get a therapist soon and after that, get tested. its a bit scary 0~o

this is so comforting!

Thank you for such an encouraging video!!!❤

Odd system phenomenon This it Kevin Lastname from the Pandora System. We are an old system but we’ve recently discovered what to call people like us. We’ve never stories like this on the internet before, only in person. So we have questions. Or rather one question for many subjects. The subjects are odd system phenomenon, and I suppose our question is, what do you make of these experiences? And we are comfortable sharing these things, to be sure to be sure. 1) The first three memories we have are of being above earth choosing a body to inhabit, then being a baby in a hospital being asked by a familiar seeming entity who asked if we would like to abort the mission before the body is sealed, and the next thing we remember is being 5 and pretending to recognize people and feel attached to them. We could vibe out that we recognized people like mom, but we didn’t really know who they were. 2) We are autistic, we had a little trouble learning empathy as a child so someone told us something like “if I were you, I would do a lot of things differently” so we thought “but there’s a reason for everything I’ve done here. If you were me you would do exactly what I would do. If you were me, you would be me… and if I were you, I would be exactly like you.” There was this realization that every person behaves based on their experiences and that if I wanted to really understand why people did the things they did, I had to forget my own presence in their mind when I thought about what it was like to be them. After that People seemed more understandable, still mostly unbearable, but better. But eventually they got boring. They were older, but they were slow and mostly predictable. What I couldn’t predict how they interact with me. 3) Throughout our childhood we had sprinkles of learning about the horrors of the world between all the other stuff happening. We used our super mega dissociative empathy to learn what life could have been. We had vicious nightmares from then on. We tried to tell people. They told us we should be ashamed, that some people have real problems and really go through those things. So I tried again and got a similar answer from others. Somehow I got the idea to try telling my dreams from reality, and that worked for a while, but my dreams felt alive and they got more vivid and immersive. Eventually I could no longer tell the difference between dreams and reality and time began to stretch. Dream memories became waking memories so, the years seemed longer. 4) When we were 10 we had a recurring dream that we couldn’t remember until we stopped having them. We dreamed that we had found a magical book that transport you anywhere in space and time. We decoded this book and went of strange magical adventures. We don’t remember all the details because one, it was dream, and two, there we fought in a war and there was lots of really bad stuff that happened. So when we remembered it as a dream we wanted go back, but we were unable to. We wanted to write stories about it so we didn’t have to lose our old life there. 5) In middle school the dreams sucked every night for about a year we would have dreams every other night where we had a bad day at school. The we would wake up, go to school and try not to let the things in our dream happen, but because we were a powerless middle schooler with almost no friends, we couldn’t stop it and we had to live the same shitty day twice in a row. 6) We met someone like us in high school. We got into a relationship, and at the time we understood them as spirits, they could move around and come from outside the system. We got very close. Closer than is possible with singlets. We were able to enter each others head space. We’d been able to describe areas that had never been brought up, appearances of some alter, creatures in the worlds. We could feel each others feelings even from a distance. I have felt feelings that did not come from anyone in the system in the middle of a class, later to find out that at that exact minute something had upset the other body. Some of the alters from the other body were able to pass from entering the headspace to almost fronting for us. Our relationship didn’t last for too much real time, so we could have theoretically have taken things further. I don’t think they wanted to though. What we were talking about doing before things started going really down hill because of things on the outside was basically building up these connections so we could move more freely between the bodies. To be clear, I don’t know how any of this worked, but I don’t think this breaks any physical laws. If I’m right this just another weird thing brains can do that no one with money has thought to study yet. The weirdest thing was that the barrier between the bodied felt like any other amnesic barrier, just thicker. I dunno. Yet us know what y’all think.

thank you. i needed to hear this today.

Really thank you

Amazing video. Thank you so much ♥️

I'm having such a hard time figuring out if i have osdd. I definitely have a dissociative disorder of some kind, but i dont have any day to day amnesia, just general forgetfulness and spaceyness. I think i have emotional amnesia, but i just don't know. And the fact that denial is a symptom of the disorder doesnt help. I feel like I can't trust my own brain. I don't know if im in denial because its a symptom or if im in denial because i really don't think i have it. It's really distressing and confusing.

why am i crying rn??

Thank you so much for this

Love the new intro/outro! Hope yous do, too. Glad you are goofball you.

Good video yes it’s gets overwhelming when you first find out but like us you will get use of it. We use Facebook communities and it’s has worked for us but it definitely depends on the community.

Thank you

off topic, but have you seen how Moon Knight portrays DID? Be interesting to get the take on it from someone with DID.

Thanks 💞🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💞👊

currently figuring out if i'm plural. i think i am, at least - yesterday a fragmented personality or someone who isn't entirely separate from me made herself known and i've been dissociating a lot since then. i keep telling myself that its fake since "R" (the other "fragmented personality or the alter) feels like me but we think its a lot of co-con? i also struggle with communicating with her, as i rarely hear her speak in our headspace. even viewing my headspace is hard. i think atm, while i (the host i think) go through day to day life and trying hard to exist (due to diagnosed MDD), i often feel partially like someone else when things get too hard. before finding out the possibility of being plural, i would "assign" a part of my brain to handle the current situation since i thought that was normal. everything is just confusing and im sorry for rambling here in the comments. i hope we figure something out eventually - i'm extremely scared of claiming to have something publicly so i think to be safe, we'll keep this knowledge to ourselves until we know more. (we have a couple who we're friends with and they both are systems and have met "R" for a bit yesterday.)

Question for ya: Since you know absolutely everything about dissociation (just kidding). How do you tell the difference between forgetfulness due to being tired, stressed, etc, versus forgetfulness due to dissociative amnesia.

❤️

So when you have been revealed you can not reconceal it... Is that what it means? I wonder what it means 93 93/93 This jekyl hide, lucifer jesus michael satan, fight club, korn system mind control unleash the beast type stuff... Hmm... does this seem real to you, like this could be a forced on you type of thing?

hello!! this video was really helpful for us, i have good contact with 4 others at the moment, me and another alter feel we are ready to switch, but our brain just wont let us? hes in co-con a lot, but he cant seem to take over, we have kind of recently figured ourself out, but, im not really sure where to go next ? any advice would be helpful but no force of course !!

Do you have any recommendations for minors? I think I have OSDD-1b, but I don't think I can bring this information to my parents or therapist. I'm kind of stuck.

Do you guys have problems with some alters keeping your mind awake at night while the host is unconscious?

Drop dead Fred was a terifieing movie...