AFRICAN TRIBE WHERE OLD WOMEN MARRY YOUNGER WOMEN. 

#tanzania #nyumbantobhu #african
In Tanzania, same-sex marriage is illegal and, in recent years, homosexuality has faced increasing persecution from the government. However, within the Kuria tribe, a unique tradition known as "nyumba ntobhu"offers an intriguing alternative to conventional marriage.
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Nyumba ntobhu (meaning "house without a man") is a traditional form of non-sexual same-sex union among Kuria women of the Mara Region of Tanzania and Kenya ; the partnerships are formed between older, usually widowed women without male descendants and younger, childless women, known as mokamööna (daughters-in-law). As part of the relationship, the younger mokamööna bears a child from an external male partner. The elder woman serves as a grandmother to the resulting child, thus securing her with an heir and ensuring the continuation of her lineage. Nyumba ntobhu marriages, like traditional Kuria marriages, are secured through the payment of a bride price in the form of cattle; in the case of nyumba ntobhu relationships, the bride price is provided by the older woman to the family of the younger partner.
Among the Kuria, nyumba ntobhu couples make up an estimated 10 to 15 percent of households.
Nyumba ntobhu relationships have become increasingly common within recent years. Many younger Kuria women enter the relationships as a means of gaining increased agency in choosing their sexual partners and avoiding domestic abuse and female genital mutilation.
Nyumba ntobhu has deep roots in Kuria culture but was rarely used in ancient times. As the Kuria population grew, the tradition became more common. Starting in the 1970s, the practice saw a notable increase. Unlike many other cultures, the Kuria community does not stigmatize women involved in nyumba ntobhu marriages. This acceptance raises questions about the nature of marriage: Is it about romantic love, or is it about mutual empowerment and support?
In Tanzania, as in many African and Middle Eastern countries, traditional laws prevent women from owning or inheriting property. In rural areas, this lack of property ownership translates to severe economic disadvantage. Without land, women struggle to feed themselves and their families, earn money, or even secure a home, making them perpetually dependent on men. For many rural Tanzanian women, marriage is the only viable option for shelter and stability.
The tradition of nyumba ntobhu has unexpectedly become a lifeline for Kuria women facing another significant issue: domestic violence. The Mara region, predominantly inhabited by the Kuria tribe, has the highest rate of spousal domestic violence in Tanzania. In this context, nyumba ntobhu marriages offer safety and support to many women who otherwise have minimal rights and protections.
In a nyumba ntobhu marriage, the younger woman is allowed to have sexual relationships with men and is expected to bear children who will belong to the older woman's family. The biological fathers have no rights over these children. This arrangement gives the younger woman autonomy in choosing her male partners and deciding when to end relationships, a freedom not commonly afforded in other types of marriages within the region.
While nyumba ntobhu provides a measure of security and empowerment, it is not without its flaws. It does not guarantee happiness or solve all the issues faced by Kuria women. Due to the freedom to have many male sex partners, it may expose these women to HIV. Nonetheless, it represents a significant step toward addressing the severe limitations imposed by traditional and legal restrictions on women's rights in Tanzania.
Nyumba ntobhu highlights the resilience and adaptability of the Kuria women in the face of systemic gender inequality. By ensuring property inheritance and providing a haven from domestic violence, this tradition offers a semblance of stability and control over their lives. It challenges the conventional notions of marriage and showcases how cultural practices can evolve to meet the needs of the community.
While it may not be a perfect solution, it offers a vital alternative for women seeking safety, stability, and a semblance of autonomy in a society that otherwise restricts their rights.