Are We Soulmates or Settling? Feat. Ezee and Natalie | Lovers and Friends Ep. 37

Lovers and Friends Podcast with Shan Boodram

Подписаться 104 тыс.

Просмотров 98 тыс.

50% 1

Can genuine friends truly transition into longterm romantic and sexual partners? Is it more ideal to gradually walk into love WITH someone who’s already your best friend OR fall in love and then become best friends?
According to a 2021 study published in Social Psychological and Personality Science finds that two thirds of romantic couples started out in a platonic relationship. Yes, 68% reported that their current romantic relationship began as a friendship! And the rate of friends to lovers was even higher among 20 somethings and within the LGBTQ+ communities with 85% reported that their relationship began as a friendship. And more interestingly I think, only 30% said they were sexually attracted to the partner from the very beginning.
You might be like, why is this so shocking to you and it’s because in essence our generation might be rewriting the traditionally understood blueprint for forming romantic bonds.
This is what we discuss with guests Ezee and Natalie, two comedic-content creators turned collaborators turned best friends turned lovers, who have shared every part of their journey online and thus have sparked a lot of conversations about whether plutonic friends really shift to romantic lovers in a way that is both equal and sustainable? And with Hotline Bling producer plus half of DVSN's Nineteen85 aka Paul Jefferies.
Follow Shan on Instagram:
httpss:// shanboody
Follow the guests on this episode
Ezee
/ ezee
/ youngezee
/ ezeexnatalie
Natalie
/ natalie.odell
/ natalieodellxo
/ ezeexnatalie
Nineteen85
/ nineteen85_
/ dvsn
/ @dvsnofficial

Опубликовано:

29 авг 2024

Ссылка:

Скачать:

Готовим ссылку...

Добавить в:

Мой плейлист

Посмотреть позже

Комментарии : 115

@kimberlyjackson8064 Год назад

I’ve had friends try to convince me to become romantic with our mutual friend because he expressed to them he was interested in me. But here’s the thing, as your friend, I have a front row seat and can see how you are in your relationships. Unfortunately for him that wasn’t a good thing. I’m not going to be naive and think you’d all of a sudden handle me differently than your other partners just because you’re with me. I’m going to accept that that’s who you are in relationships and keep you as a friend. Overall I think he’s great and fun to be around but there’s some things I don’t agree with

@e113jelly6 Год назад

Yep smart girl

@tigerlily9673 Год назад

That is the right decision. Don’t let him convince you otherwise.

@locdlovd5540 Год назад

LOVE THIS WAY OF THINKING

@teneshiadavis6039 Год назад

Well said 🤔

@KEYLA_BRANAE Год назад

Yesss 🙌🏽🙌🏽👏🏽👏🏽🎉🎉

@MichelleNgome Год назад

I date women and have a strict rule not to get involved with my friends. Also, if I do find myself attracted to a woman I ask her out right away to avoid any cloudiness in the potential friendship/relationship. Another great episode thanks.

@diamcole Год назад

Same! I try to keep those lines very clear, I've seen it go left with others in my life and I don't want to risk it.

@beewest5704 Год назад

Started dating my best friend. He had mostly female friends & I had no problem with them so I thought he would have no problem with my mostly male friends. Wrong! He turned into a insecure, jealous psycho. I did not know anything abt the guys who would ask him my number when we were still friends & when he saw me anywhere near them when we started dating he went crazy. Sometimes the friend you know & love is a completely different human being in a romantic relationship.

@tatica822 Год назад

Fell in love with a best friend, dated for three years. Broke up because as a partner he was really insecure. Now I'm trying to go back to have something platonically because I don't want to lose his friendship. A mess y'all 😔

@banziimavuso9974 Год назад

Sorry boo ❤️

@SkatesPraise Год назад

Look it's not going to work! Just move bitterless forward! You've ben romanticly together and its not going to be easy it's best for both of you to just distance yourself from each other and live your lifes.....

@teelc0253 Год назад

Awww sorry to hear that. Hoping one day you both find that friendship you once had.

@JJohns1980 Год назад

Very interesting. I do not consider friends as viable dating options. Had a friend that was interested in more & I found out from someone else. I was pissed because not only did I not see him that way, but I felt deceived. Especially after having early on in the friendship told that’s why I valued the friendship because I’m not attracted to him. People should not pretend to be your friend when they desire more.

@YvetteCousin Год назад

I married my best friend.. we went from friends to engaged to married. He is the OPPERSITE of what I thought my husband would be. He said he was in love with me for years.. we have been married for over 10 yrs now

@sarahgibson8866 Год назад

Ezze and nat is the reason I came out, I was hiding and suppressing my feelings for the same ex....now I'm soooo happy and fulfilled. It wasn't an easy journey, still isn't but I'm at peace with myself....I love you guys sooooo much and shan, I swear you inspire me ❤

@MizAlexandria Год назад

It didn't work out for me when I did and losing their friendship entirely was rough. Real love is worth the risk though. I'd rather love them even for a moment than to not experience loving them at all.

@hannujabella Год назад

Thats really deep and brave. Kudos to you!

@Itsjust_wood Год назад

Ahhh you dropped the visual!!! I’ve listened to the podcast over and over but it’s only right that the Queens of facial expressions have visuals too😂. Thanks Shan❤

@griceltorres7701 Год назад

He seems to be emotionally intelligent and understanding.

@Myshelleallen Год назад

I love Ezee !!!! Sometimes I feel like she’s trying to be too commercial though! I feel like she’s different behind camera wish she would let her guard down . She seems like a player!! But she’s dope .

@orchidchamblee Год назад

You definitely can be friends with ppl you could be or are attracted to bc ppl have value beyond sexual gratification. Like how you value a cousin etc just takes looking beyond sexuality. It’s hard to do though for many ppl.

@benirpierre2671 Год назад

I hear it, but I've never found a cousin sexually attractive. It's not the same type of love.

@sakuraesther6309 Год назад

@@benirpierre2671 You have never but many many people surely have

@hightunnel2723 Год назад

Your friend cracking up when you were talking about your other friend getting pissed at you made my night hahaha

@nomsamatlhola3885 Год назад

The chemistry between Shan and Y'all, it's just amazing 🤗🤗🤗♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

@Sagiana Год назад

I’m not really getting the vibe of a genuine love story either lol Natalie still gives me best friend energy and it seems a little pushed on Ezees end. Hope for the best

@truthbetold3033 Год назад

I feel the same way. To me, Ezee manipulated Nat by blurring the friendship/romantic lines. Because hetero male and female best friends wouldn't be cuddling and twerking like that. But, Ezee took her time and played with Nat's emotions. At least that's what I think. I think Nat is too straight and is trying to make herself sexually into Ezee.

@sisg.official Год назад

They broke up

@Sagiana Год назад

@@sisg.official of course they did 🤦🏾‍♀️

@antoniavasile63 Год назад

Giirl, this was the most entertaining video I’ve seen. I was laughing with you, felt like I was part of the conversation. Loved it ❤

@PromiseFaithLove Год назад

I am a definite believer in friendship being the foundation of every healthy relationship, romantic or not . Defo potential to be the best thing that happens in your life , or the worst coz u lose your friend and lover . I’m optimistic about this relationship though .

@socialwork63 Год назад

This has FINALLY dropped.....I been waiting!!!! Thank you.

@rhondaramos2937 Год назад

This was a good interview they’re all very open and funny

@mochi_3600 Год назад

We’ve been best friends since the age 10.. we’ve been married going on 4 years and dating for 7..

@Ezee Год назад

You’re the best 🥹🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽

@herangellust9603 Год назад

what’s the link to the apology language ezee?! love you & Natalie 🤍

@Milaxj Год назад

I can definitely relate to everything said/discussed in this video. My situation didn’t work out for me, mainly because of family acceptance, but thanks for sharing your journey.

@marleysimp7132 Год назад

I love how open and honest they can be with one another this is a definition of a honest lesbian relationship no controlling just two females loving and letting one another be who they want to be!

@jayallison2468 Год назад

ezee gives me the vibes that they would be fine if this relationship doesn't work like they kept saying she's surrounded by hot ppl that want her lol. i think it would be esp hard to be w a straight woman or a woman figuring out their sexuality. it takes a certain level of patience to hold someone's hand through their sexual journey. love can definitely be enough to carry you through but that's hard.

@nikrich24 Год назад

I fuckin LOVE DVSN, hands down one of the most underrated groups

@arm2770 2 месяца назад

Never ever cross the line with a good friend, keep it friendly always🙏💜🙌

@notl33t 11 месяцев назад

i typically ask early, even if i get a friend vibe, mostly to get it out of the way if i'm actually attracted to someone. some of the folks i've asked out (and i am queer) have ended up being long term friends so i think its really worth it to let someone know i'm interested immediately--at the very least i want to know that there's nothing going on on their end before pursuing a friendship.

@Brad1love Год назад

Every type of relationship goes through peaks and valleys. I think their odds are the same as any other relationship.

@savagexlover2226 7 месяцев назад

Unrequited love HURTS real bad

@zanele_sekgobela Год назад

Is it me or Shan and Natalie kinda look alike 👀

@banziimavuso9974 Год назад

It's not you ✨

@mofobish Год назад

They are literally twins, been searching for someone who thought the same thing 😭

@montserratgallegos4645 Год назад

Hahahahahaha this is such a funny interview I loved it. I’ve definitely been there before.

@TheJlyn528 Год назад

I tried and it didn't work out for us. I lost my best friend also in the process. It took years before we could speak again.

@Saafyr Год назад

omg im geeking my worlds are merging!!!❤😮🎉 love yall!!!

@Just.Kayla21 Год назад

Great conversation

@natnathello Год назад

It is funny how I am coming back to this after they broke up but this video from jump said a lot EZEE sacrifices a lot

@taijiaelder8081 Год назад

I’m really early lol but I love you Shan. It’s probably extremely scary to fall in love with your best friend 🥺 especially if it’s not reciprocated.

@martianmoongdds 10 месяцев назад

Omg you and Paul’s friendship, and everything he said 💙 thank you

@desireeeason4561 10 месяцев назад

This was amazing this is my first time being here but I will be back

@afrolofi Год назад

You all look like siblings Shan and Natalie.

@hightunnel2723 Год назад

I like this episode a lot, cause it has always boggled my mind the concept of men and women not being able to be friends. Which I resonate with cause I thought I had close friends once upon a time and it turns out they just want to sleep with me. It really hurt me. It still really hurts me, he’s been with me through some tough times

@TaiJ-Aird Год назад

Lol well I am in the middle of this bestfriends for over 12 years and not even remotely attracted and never touched throughout our friendship nothing..then last year I started to see in him everything I was asking for and didnt know he had feelings for me for a while (we always said we had to go through our journey first to reach this point)... I have to be honest the physical stuff was a bit harder to get comfortable with but I just felt/feel soo happy with him and decided to just go for it... wish me luck 🙏🏽 😅 🙂

@missrd395 Год назад

Nice convo, but all the convo's always feel like it is an open end ... I guess because shan doesn't officially closes off the podcast with her guests. But I guess thats the format.

@MissTiffyTiff Год назад

I fell in love with my BFF And I was in a relationship with my daughters father....We was at the very end and breaking up but it was a wrap. Even once we were officially done I didnt say a word bc I was soooo scared to ruin our friendship. We did everything together but a few months after my breakup Sept 20 2003 we went out to eat dinner one night and went to the park I made my move and asked for a kiss🤷🏾‍♀️🤣🤣🤣 He agreed.....it was super weird after bc he invited me over and I said no😂😂😂😂 I'd like to say 6 days later we slept together and been together over since. My daughter was 2 yrs old when got together, she just turned 22 last wk, we have 3 sons 18,12 and 10 and been happily happily married almost 12 yrs❤❤❤❤ He says me asking for a kiss was the best thing bc he was never going to try anything with due to fear bc he didn't want to mess up our friendship, even though he had strong feelings as well.....Im 45 and he is 46 now......best decision I made almost 20 yrs ago.

@kiaracarbullido402 Год назад

I’m laughing over here with you guys 🥴💗🤣 33:12

@thatpartdafk6345 Год назад

Omg Shan & Natalie are so naturally beautiful they resemble sisters! Tbh I believe that Ezee made it very easy for Nat to fall for her bc Ez was/is obsessed with Nat and they also have great chemistry naturally beautiful energy together, Nat feels safe with her bc Ez is cool asf,I don't think it's soulmates or settling it's just alignment/opportunities with good vibes,Ez is the lezbo in love & Nat is bi sexual in like with a woman for now periodtt!🦄🤔🤩🥂🤑🎯jmo

@ayanagaines6880 Год назад

There was this guy I met on one of those phone chatlines and I took my cousin over with me to smoke with him. He told me he wasn’t interested me. I said that’s cool. I’m not looking for a guy right now. We’d meet up at the car wash and wash our cars. We’d always be together. Go to the club and people would ask if we’re dating because of the way we danced with each other. We ended up kissing one night and I left the city. He would always talk about his feelings for me but I would always change the subject. I knew the history he had with females and didn’t want to be another victim lol

@Beautifullyaberrant Год назад

It took me until the end of the podcast to realize that was part of the Dvsn. Oh how I miss music channels. Good talk!

@marleysimp7132 Год назад

It's very interesting how EZEE is so open to feeling that way about her friends but on the low? lol to me idk how to feel because it's like why would that even be a thought? Like it should be boundaries set with self first of all! 🤦 some are very different idk can someone help me understand!

@Daisy-rx2ll Год назад

But does Eeze think she's a beautiful woman herself?

@ebonyturner3638 Год назад

I knew summin was up with Shan and Amber 👀👀

@destrim7 Год назад

I thought it was just me who caught that. Lol 😂

@teshawnameertins Год назад

i think your friendship was tainted by love interests, but i think having a great friend group that breaks up as you become adults is a shared experience for most of us

@Imeldaf18 Год назад

Hahaha!! About to spell the TEA 😂😂😂

@buggypssmith1785 Год назад

Ezee and Natalie!🔥

@Dream-Me Год назад

I'm not convinced 😕 but they should enjoy it while it last

@melissac7029 Год назад

Thank you ❤️

@withme1660 Год назад

Could you explore dating your best friend sibling? Just lost my best friend cause of this.

@passionbaridinbo Год назад

Two thing 1. They either liked you which is bad depending on how long you no relationship lasts. It can affect you in the future 2.which is the bettr option, they will take time to process and based on a try friendship, they love you both, so it will take some time but they will come back, maybe not the same but they will, unfortunately you might not be able to talk about your relationship to them

@passionbaridinbo Год назад

*now *better *true

@withme1660 Год назад

@@passionbaridinbo I think right now it is the 2nd option. Like you said it will be different. That worries me because the difference would be that I did something wrong and not that we’re both trying to make it up to each other since we both handled the situation wrongly.

@passionbaridinbo Год назад

@@withme1660 I wish you all the best, be ready for that as a consequence but make sure you also express that you were hoping , not requiring, that they handle the education differently and that you understand at the end of the day that it would alter the chemistry of the friendship which saddens you but is understandable. Communication really is key.

@withme1660 Год назад

@@passionbaridinboVery true, thank you :)

@ericarolison359 5 месяцев назад

Beautiful ❤❤❤❤❤❤

@chunk5214 Год назад

Did I already see this

@Sagiana Год назад

Falling in love with your best friend is not logical at all. It sounds romantic but in reality it seems like a boundary that gets crossed which is not the good way to start out a relationship. The friendship you get after becoming lovers is sooooooo different than is you start off as a platonic friendship and I think the 2 should stay in their own lanes

@lbia5122 Год назад

Can your Best Friend not be your spouse?

@Ashylah Год назад

I think it’s more to than just loosing friendships if they don’t love u the same way I feel like u have to be mentally prepared for things to be sexual, mentally prepared to have those conversations where it’s like if we don’t end up together I cannot be friends with u so it’s more than just taking a risk u know ( sorry just rambling my thoughts)

@Tyrell4Real Год назад

So Daniel is the other half of dvsn?

@thatgirlshaz Год назад

Yes but she was refer to the friend as “Danny” and when spoke about 1985 joining a group he referred to him as “Daniel” so maybe they are 2 different people? Idk

@YouTubehandl3333 Год назад

This is why lesbian women be trying me… they think they can flip me like Natalie 😂

@andreamoore7002 Год назад

I could be wrong but did i hear you say you were with Amber?

@kailaredwine Год назад

What song is this y’all ? 36:32

@originalmings1991 Год назад

And they’re broken up now; this interview became more interesting

@BluntSpeaker Год назад

Why is this posted now??

@mkw341 Год назад

Ezee and Natalie had briefly broken up after this podcast so I guess she waited until things were cool again

@zaphire2766 Год назад

@@mkw341 really they brokeup?

@mkw341 Год назад

@@zaphire2766 yes

@shelbyspellman3046 Год назад

35:05💕

@ramonitarodriguez8753 Год назад

🎉

@gloryenoch37 Год назад

I need to slime into someone's DM now 😃😃

@onelove2273 Год назад

Watching this podcast is just demonstrate the double standard in the black community and not one comment that’s homophobic , but if this was ever a male or transgender woman the hate would be on a different level -->look at the hypocrisy

@onelove2273 Год назад

@@BeautyTesha as a lesbian, you should be ashamed of yourself really because there’s lots of trans women who speak about their stories and there’s lots of gay men who speak their stories, we don’t get a platform to speak it.. and when we do our partners get labelled as gay or down, low by the black community, the black community are condemned to be more, excepting to lesbian & sexual fluid females, the black heterosexual community feel more comfortable because it’s too women so if you’re going to erase the fact that there is no double standard, when it comes to heterosexual platforms, I think that’s dangerous !

@onelove2273 Год назад

@@BeautyTesha I can name a few…. Gerren Keith Gaynor, Chris Witherspoon, Phill Wilson, karamo Brown, Darnell Moore, Danez Smith, Micheal Arceaux, B Hawk !!! girl what are you talking about? There’s so many would you like some more names !! You call yourself a lesbian, but you’re not educated about the LGBTQ community don’t tell me you’re just walking around with the label for no reason

@onelove2273 Год назад

@@BeautyTesha a transgender actress MJ Rodriguez on pose told her love story and the feedback was transphobic and homophobic to her partner ! The black community call him gay for being with her! Do you need any other names?

@tparker4458 Год назад

Why do we have to bring trans ppl into every conversation? Honest question.. respectfully, what’s the reason ?

@onelove2273 Год назад

@@tparker4458 because ppl like u question their existence !!!

@moorenina08 Год назад

whats an easy sexual?

@Itsjust_wood Год назад

*Ezee-sexual* meaning she’s only sexually attracted to Ezee

@Eromero626 Год назад

Yeah what the other comment is saying. Her partners name is Ezee.

@marleysimp7132 Год назад

I will not be comfortable talking about splitting up like that would never even be a conversation awww, EZEE looked so sad. 🥹

@robertvoid9896 Год назад

It's always interesting how women today put so many standards on men to be even remotely worth their time and energy but will accept another woman, flaws and all. Begs the question of are you truly in love or just rebelling against men in general?

@jaysteph3167 Год назад

Because you’ll get true 50/50 with a woman.

@michilove6554 Год назад

I'd have to say falling in love and then becoming best friends. I did the opposite n it was disastrous. He was trash as a partner n it destroyed our friendship. I vowed to never do that again!! I have had other male friends who fell in love with me n it sucked bc I didn't feel the same. They were always trying to pressure me to just see how things would go, n try to convince me that we could just go back to being friends if it didn't work out. Eventually, me constantly turning them down, caused them to hate me. Two have since passed but the 3rd guy still won't speak to me all these years later. With him, it was like ur situation with Danny. I was supposed to go over to his house to spend the weekend while his folks were out of town. I felt uneasy about it bc he had expressed his feelings of love for me. The more I thought about it, the more I felt that something would happen if I went, n not on my part, if u get my drift. He would always be at my house, so he was popping up at my house every day n calling all day, every day. I left n had gone to a cousin's house to stay the weekend. Went to the club one night n saw him, so I tried to go to him to apologize n explain y I didn't come over. He gave me a look like, I'll kill u. I hate u. Get out of my face. That was my last communication with him. That was when I said that men n women can't be friends. It sucks!!