Ask Nick - F*cking My Friend’s Situationship | The Viall Files w/ Nick Viall

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Welcome back to another episode of The Viall Files: Ask Nick Edition! We’re back to answer your burning questions about the world of dating and relationships! Before getting to our callers, Nick shares a friend’s dating story and how moving too quickly (and ignoring the advice of friends) can lead to a relationship ending. And we have our latest Break Up Song of the Week submission from Amanda before jumping into our callers. Our first caller is currently hooking up with her friend’s situationship, and thinks he wants to date her despite not wanting to commit to her friend. Do his actions prove that he’s ready for commitment? Our next caller was in an open relationship with her husband due to being long distance. However, he’s finally moved home and reestablished monogamy. But our caller is missing the days of sleeping with other people, and doesn’t know how to tell her husband. Our final caller is wondering if her boyfriend drinks too much. She’s addressed the situation before, but he’s lied to her about drinking and how much he’s drinking since their conversation. Can this issue be resolved, or will it only continue to get worse?
“Lying to you wasn’t as important as having a drink.”
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Опубликовано:

22 янв 2023

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Комментарии : 95

@ningyding Год назад

Omg this girl who is sleeping with her “friend”’s situationship is insufferable and deserves to lose all her friends. I can’t.

@peachxed Год назад

Definitely super super jealous of her friend. She’s so happy to brag he likes her more. Gross.

@RachASMR Год назад

Right. She had zero care for what she did.

@peachxed Год назад

@@RachASMR I’m almost going to assume judging by “our friend group is annoyed at her over this situationship” that her friend is probably in love with this guy. Regardless of any other random facts she started going off about, this was entirely on purpose against her friend. There are millions of guys out there, she didn’t need to go for this one. Now this girls losing her friend group and her love interest (in the worst way possible) all at once. The lack of empathy is unreal.

@crystalxoxos2 Год назад

How horrible is the way she is speaking about her ‘friend’? Makes me sick

@sarahcowdrey9101 Год назад

omg i know... its almost as if she's convincing herself its ok and that this guy reallyyy likes her more.

@kristen21023 Год назад

First caller is going to get slapped with humility when the guy she stole from her "friend" does the exact same thing to her. Second caller wants best of both worlds without any sacrifice...sounds very selfish.

@TNDRAV Год назад

Exactly agreed

@kristenbarron1379 Год назад

First caller needs to take 10 steps back to humble town. She sounds like a terrible person.

@andreegodbout868 Год назад

💯

@eh1126 Год назад

Yes, and her voice definitely sounds older than 29 lol

@belaracz4072 Год назад

First caller is so bitter it’s hard to even listen to 😭 she is literally not sorry to her friend at all. first caller if ur reading these comments please take a step back and have some self awareness

@JJ-id3wc Год назад

First caller seems really hung up on the fact that the guy likes her more than her friend. She seems to seem giddy over that fact. Tell your friend. Have some semblance of integrity.

@TNDRAV Год назад

Who needs enemies with friends like this woman. SHEESH

@thedrasc1465 Год назад

Good point. It almost seems like she's deluded herself into believing she likes the guy when under the surface she's just thrilled she has one upped her friend. I'm guessing her friend is prettier by society's standard

@emiliasvensson6125 Год назад

Omg the first caller 😑 so obsessed with comparing herself to her friend. Even when nick tried to move on from it and focus on just her connection with the guy, she again compares everything she is doing and saying with him to the friend. He wanna marry and be with me potentially, and he didn’t want that with my friend etc etc. I could never date or even talk to somebody that my friend is or has been interested with. The fact that this woman is also making it into a competition is just sad. Wow.

@Kloves818 Год назад

First caller needs to remember actions speak louder than words. He says he's not into her friend and still chooses to sleep with her knowing exactly how she feels. At the very least, he's extremely selfish in relationships and cant empathize with what people go through as a direct result of his actions. If this friend is acting "crazy" enough to annoy the friend group and it still doesn't push him away he's interested in her more than he's letting on, even if its only physical. I wouldn't be surprised if caller and him ended things and he went right back to her friend! She'll be there to pick up the pieces and laugh in your face when its over and done with

@nyoshavalaei-khiabani4962 Год назад

1st caller really said "I always think about other people" while sleeping with her "friends" ex.... the delusions.. 💀

@awill715 Год назад

Nick and Natalie will never be in their 90s together lol. But he sounds romantic when he says it 😂

@lalaa8653 Год назад

Wow does that first caller think this dude respects her she fuc*ed over her friend for a man I’m sure he think of her as easy and temporary

@AnaAnaAna Год назад

Ask Nick starts @ 25:35

@RachASMR Год назад

And as a worker in a drug court, anyone drinking 3-4 glasses of whisky A DAY is a problem. That’s a lot. And hiding it, lying ect. He may want to see a counselor. And if he’s not willing to budge, or change on what he’s doing when raising these concerns.. I would be stern on some change. Some effort. It’s not a good sign, unfortunately.

@conleymorris5046 Год назад

First caller doesn’t sound like she feels that bad lol

@itszaque5031 Год назад

Love the Allie and Amanda equal camera angle lol

@kativanmeter4928 Год назад

The first caller is not a good friend

@itszaque5031 Год назад

Heavy episode, wow. I’m glad I’m not caller 1’s friend, I’m glad I’m not caller 2’s husband and I’m glad I don’t have substances abuse/overuse issues; I feel for caller 3.

@kristakdahl Год назад

I wanted to cry for caller 3, I feel like she sounded so sad and just frustrated by that situation. Caller 3 if you see this, we are sending you love!!

@jenellehills5352 Год назад

Please, some how, get all three of that situationship on the show for a sit down!!!!!!😂

@kenna_rich Год назад

Everyone bagging on caller one? What about the second caller. Girl doesn’t know what marriage is about. Lol

@patchouleigh_ Год назад

Caller #2 doesn't want her husband but keeps him around because he'd make a good husband someday. 🙄

@assyrianprincess3 Год назад

Caller 1 is a trash friend

@foxjacket Год назад

Caller 1: they're both selfish and inconsiderate so they're well matched. Caller 2: she can still have her outgoing life - with him. Go out and meet people with him. Or go without him, leave him at home and instead of bringing someone else home, go home to him and bang him. Pretend you're strangers meeting in a bar and have a crazy make out session. Carve out couple time, and carve out individual time. She has to do the heavy lifting of helping him adjust to her new city. They both have to adjust to living together and all of each other's weird habits. She married him for a reason. What did she want then, what does she want now? And need? She needs to pay attention to that. Also, it's FANTASTIC that he got a job as soon as he moved there.

@RachASMR Год назад

*really do love the new setting. It’s really aesthetically pleasing on the eyes and so cozy*

@velandrea Год назад

Yes! The ladies camera position is so much better!

@betty_haynes Год назад

Gosh… caller 1 was a tough listen.

@dorseydayz5850 Год назад

Allie & Amanda are such a delight! I love this show in general but you two add so much. Good on Nick for making you full time employees, smart man! 👌🏽

@kristakdahl Год назад

I feel like that first caller is exactly why Nick does this show! He was GIDDY over that first caller's story ! lol

@tarenmiller4178 Год назад

Yes! Best way to start a Monday!

@elaineharwood3639 Год назад

Thank you Allie for rescuing him and as a senior too. It also sounds like he might help with boyfriend vetting! 😂

@PhonixTarHeels Год назад

I say this as someone who is an addiction counselor in my state, please stop taking substance use calls. Please stop taking calls regarding substance use, Nick is WAY out of his element. Amanda was much more helpful but please stop taking them. Nick has normalized problematic drinking in the past and this time he was trying to relate to her experience by talking about his weed use and that was not helpful and borderline normalizing and equating the substance use by the boyfriend. I know intentions are great but please stop.

@sabs7824 Год назад

Your weed smoking is not even comparable to a 26 year old nightly laying whisky drinker who does so even after you've shared past honest family issues. Exactly, look out for yourself. You are so young and bounderies are your best friends. Be strong, be smart, see if moving out and dating without living together. Your voice will be heard more when you make a stance and love yourself

@alyssad7019 Год назад

happy monday!!!!! woooo hooo 💚 love the new studio!

@JoJoanna05 Год назад

Lauren, last caller I want to tell you that you sound like a very intelligent, empathetic and kind person. And so mature for 24 years old. As for the situation friend who was an alcoholic told me once that the important question to determine extent of your problem with the alcohol is if you can say no to it for some time (like have a week/month without it, even if someone drink one beer every night) This is about control. Do the person can life without it or he/she needs alcohol like they needs food to survived everyday. That suggest alcohol control them and not the other way around. The other think that stuck with me from him is that alcohol (every form of addiction) is a way for that person to cope with some of their emotional baggage they are not willing to heal/didn't do it yet. So there is most likely much bigger problem under that everyday whiskey. Some form of emotional pain. As from your perspective you said that his drinking takes a toll on your time together. You could re frame it for "your everyday drinking (your boyfriend) takes away your quality time together and you are less important than that drinks". With your personal story with alcohol you could do an experiment and change it to something else f.e. video games. How you would feel if your boyfriend played video game every night instead of making some time for you two to have quality time. You would say: ok maybe we have some nights when you are playing your games but then we are having some nights without it. And how would you feel if he change it for two weeks and them ignored it and play every night? I would say he isn't priorities you. That he is putting gaming before you. Maybe it will be easier for you to see that in the end it isn't not even about the alcohol for you. It is about trust, putting effort into relationship, about listening to your needs (quality time together). Right now his bigger priority is his comfort that he is getting from the alcohol and not putting enough work into your relationship and ignoring your needs and breaking your trust again and again. You sounds like amazing person who deserves be treated with respect and right now you boyfriend doesn't gives enough respect to you. Wish you well girl!

@livetolove1438 Год назад

Lauren aka last caller, I completely resonate with you. Last year I stood where you are currently standing. I was in a relationship with someone for two years and he also had an issue with alcohol. At first, I was in denial about it, and I didn’t want to acknowledge it because I was scared of heartbreak and letting go. He wasn’t listening to me whenever I tried to talk to him about the drinking and he even lost his job over it at one point because he failed a breath exam. I was tired of worrying about him every night, wondering how many drinks he was actually consuming, which by the way, he would also lie to me about that as well. He would drink at least five big cans of beer every night. He rarely had me over his house. At parties or in general dates we went on he always drank so much that he embarrassed me. He understood and expressed that he had a problem but despite how much love and encouragement I gave him it wasn’t enough to push him to get help. I didn’t want my future to consist of picking up his beer cans. I didn’t want our future children to be exposed to this and I didn’t want to live a life of constant stress. I made the choice to break up with him. I was a caller on the show last year, that really pushed me and gave me the encouragement I needed to leave him. Afterwards I decided to enroll in therapy to come to terms with it, and to fix my own issues about relationships and dependency, and reflect on what I could do in the future to work on myself. I am at peace with the fact that I could not help him but I do hope one day he helps himself and I wish nothing but the best for him but it was the greatest decision I’ve ever made in my life. I feel safer now and extremely relieved that I got out of that situation. I hope that you realize you DO have a choice and you DO NOT need to put up with this. I am now in a relationship with someone who I can trust who makes me feel comfortable and who I can go out with without feeling scared of how much he will drink. You control your own destiny. There is no time like the present and believe me you have to be ready to choose yourself. ❤

@skystruck236 Год назад

The first caller, no offense to her at all but Incase she is reading the comments I think it’s important for her to see that she’s coming off as a pick me girl. And she needs to realize her friend may have some truths in her chaos, he could have been saying all these wonderful things to her too, regardless or not if he was going down on her. If he is willing to do that to her, he could ABSOLUTELY be willing to do it to her too. Especially with fuck boys it’s always a higher possibility, especially with how they started their relationship. If he really wanted to be with her and date her, he would have immediately made it clear to the other girl right away that he is no longer available BECAUSE he found someone else not because he’a just not into her. She’s gotta be careful fuck boys play games and she can’t give her heart too quickly or she’s going to get hurt. Also what is she considering a date? Because many girls will consider grabbing fast food and hanging out at home a date, that’s not a date though that’s just a hang out and probably a hook up. She’s gotta be careful, and she’s gotta have more integrity inside her friendships. I would not trust her, she’s rubbing salt into her friend’s wound and demonizing her friend for having hurt feelings from this guy playing her .

@savannahroark8086 Год назад

New studio is stunning

@abbyrodriguez1038 Год назад

The story about the friend talking to a guy that wouldn’t slow down even after being told too. I felt that. He was also doing things to not look like a fuckboy, he would communicate, showed interest but he was doing too much. I actually experienced this and it did suck ending it cause he was a nice guy and I did like talking to him. He was communicative, patient, understanding and nice. I never had that when talking to a guy. We were talking for a few months but only met twice. Those two times we went to the movies but then go home after. We didn’t chat much or have like a full conversation but when I went home he would text me “you make me so happy I hope you can see that”. I can’t remember if it was a few days before or after the first time we actually met but he said “I like you” “i want to make you mine”, granted he was drunk but said he meant it when he was sober. There was some red flags but I would communicate to him that I wanted to slow things down and he was going in a fast pace. I felt like he was excited about starting something new and liked the idea of love that he fell for that image. He confirmed that when he said “I’m sorry I just love love and I get excited easily”. He didn’t know me well enough to like me, also we didn’t have a full conversation in person for him to feel that way. I told him he just likes the excitement and not me, he doesn’t know me. He just loves the idea of love and he created an image of me in his head that he’s falling for. It sucked cause he was cool and sweet and I genuinely enjoyed talking to him but I knew it wasn’t going to end well. He didn’t know me and wouldn’t slow down to get to know me so I ended it. Sorry that this is long, I just sort of related to the friend and wanted to rant.

@tararainone5060 Год назад

The first caller is a bad friend or her and that “friend” is really not her friend. She kept making excuses of why she did what she did.

@velandrea Год назад

“Truly love my Jeff but I don’t have the same affinity for all dogs but they all love me”. Is me 🙋‍♀️ Shortly after Nick said that, a coworker walks into my office to show me a picture of his dog and IDGAF, I can’t hide it anymore 😩 He does this several times a week. I started keeping my door closed to prevent it, it helps 😂 For context he started doing this and specifically the day after we lost our dog, like cool dude you love your dog but I’m grieving please get the hint. I should have said that right then and there. Please make merch that says ‘IDGAF about your dog but I love mine’. Thank you 😂

@TheFrancoPhiler Год назад

It is NOT okay to leave cats. They are sensitive, social, and form deep bonds. A skittish cat is an insecure, fearful, unhappy cat. With dedicated patience, a cat is a deeply loving and loyal companion. I think it is humbling and requires patience to win over a cat because a cat sees you as an equal. A dog sees you as dominant.

@evelyngonzalez5063 9 месяцев назад

Every time the 2nd caller laughed I felt so bad for her husband 😮‍💨🫠

@tifftom Год назад

Thank you for taking that horrid line across the screen off when guests call in !! :)

@kennieandbaker Год назад

To the woman with the alcoholic boyfriend I hope I can help you!! I live with my boyfriend and I’ve been friends with him for a long time before. We used to call each other our “favorite drinking buddies” because we had so much fun together drinking as friends and the beginning of our relationship. Living together made me realize he was an active alcoholic. You’re boyfriend is very similar. I know that it’s scary to tell someone that they need help. But in my case, every person knew my boyfriend did for years and would try to tell him to get help but he’d never listen. I think he loves you a lot and it’s very possible you could be a big factor in saving his life…because that’s how harmful alcoholism is. I encourage you to take a firm stance with him and suggest he face the issue and go to an AA meeting and get involved in a program. It’s with that stance you’ll be able to see where he’s at in his potential recovery. If he refuses to accept that he has an issue, I hope you can find the strength to walk away from the relationship. It could save his life (and yours) one day down the line! YOU NEED TO BE FIRM because a person in active addiction cannot see your perspective and have empathy. My boyfriend is 8 moths sober now btw and very very happy with his courage to face his own issues. Also understand that this will be the rest of your life and a lot will change. Ask yourself if you’re ready to be with a partner like this potentially. Lots of love to the podcast I just encourage you to seek other advice please! You can also attend any local Al-anon meeting yourself to get help from other partners that have been in your shoes ❤

@mrsjessicasmith Год назад

As someone who was once married to an alcoholic, they will only change when they are ready and decide on their own. Nothing you say or do will be long lasting otherwise. They'll stop for a few months or go to a treatment for a bit and then the cycle will start all over again.

@nk47100 Год назад

Wow - two rather selfish callers today, sorry to say.

@superpowereddesign4341 Год назад

This episode for me took a turn. It's okay to provide advice to 20-something year old women in dating, but when it comes to addictions, it should be left to the professionals. I don't think that the producers should be providing advice in this arena. And, BTW... if you are smoking weed every night, it's an addiction. Stick to the simple stuff and advice, or you are opening up yourself to something that will bite you in the butt.

@Velvet3699 Год назад

Cats seem to go to people who are allergic....

@tatyanatatur2641 Год назад

Where are those candles from

@lizcrocker7465 Год назад

There is definitely earthquake weather!

@lizcrocker7465 Год назад

You and Natalie should check 19:51 19:52 out Vibiana in LA. I was at my cousins wedding there two weeks ago, and it was unbelievably beautiful and unique.

@Velvet3699 Год назад

Kiki is well trained. She doesn't move much! I wasn't sure she was real....

@eh1126 Год назад

First caller is a horrible “friend” and her entire group should be wary of her. She also seemed super giddy about the guy supposedly liking her more than her friend. I would bet that she has wanted to steal him the moment her friend brought him over, again….horrible friend! Caller number 2 should not have gotten married. Her husband should divorce her and cut his losses. She’s not into him and the worst thing is that if she saw him dating someone else she would have a problem with it. 1:02:44 lol Nick saying this as I’m typing 😂

@kaylaryan2575 Год назад

Second caller, marriage isn’t forever kids are forever.

@JoJoanna05 Год назад

Wow second caller lives in some lala land. Right now she doesn't even give her husband a change! Look at this from his perspective. He basically found himself in new country, new city where he knew only his wife. He found his job in four days on being there and went to it straight away not even had some time to acclimate in this situation/new place. He wants to built friendship and from what she told here is already thinking/doing that in new work but it takes time to create new relationship with people. And even before his moving he recognized the situation they have been and that separation was hard on her and open up their relationship because she wanted that. So he is doing everything for her and them (he moved to her leaving his comfort zone) and she doesn't give him a time to settle down in his new life and she is complaining about her even minor discomfort and only want to have fun. They have never lived together in their house. There is a whole new world that they both live in and now is a time to put some work in to get to know/create that new reality and she is having a temper tantrum worst that some babies have. That is a time for her and husband to learn how to be with each other in this new situation. It sounds like he is doing everything he can. And he had to deal with bigger change that her (she has her comforts all around her: home, friends, city, country, family and more) and he is doing a better job with handling the changes. If in the future she or him learnt they aren't for each other and so be it but right now she isn't willing to do the job to establish her life with him. And now It is not a time to open relationship because their relationship isn't well established. She sounds so immature and selfish and her actions are like that too. What I heard fro her it was only: ME, ME, ME. When now is the time of thinking WE and find the answers about how life as "WE" for they both looks like. She doesn't want to do any work!

@kaylaryan2575 Год назад

Nick coming from a former “pothead” my husband and I actually both were once we had a child it just didn’t appeal to us anymore with that being said love it up and then we you have a child maybe reevaluate and discuss with Natalie about it.

@ina3720 Год назад

Sad to say this but I hate the new setting…

@mrsjessicasmith Год назад

I thought the first one was bad but yikes, this one looks terrible and cheap IMO.

@ina3720 Год назад

@@mrsjessicasmith I actually didn’t mind the last one, this one does feel more homey but I really dislike the lighting and the curtains. Idk I feel like it’s a flop

@candy07831 Год назад

Why’d you have to add RU-vid ads 😫

@ermo3133 Год назад

First caller… horrible friend. It’s like you had to beat in into her head about her ego. She’s so full of herself and it was hard to listen to lol

@birdofparadize Год назад

Set looks like the 80s

@MrIzzyjackson Год назад

With the drinking problem situation, I don't think the question is whether the boyfriend has a drinking problem, I think that it's rather clear that he is not feeling well. He needs something to change and that thing probably needs to be therapy. There is something else going on.

@Urmomlovesyoutube Год назад

3-4 glasses of whisky every night is not something to take lightly. That is a lot of alcohol to drink every night

@bronwyn117 Год назад

2nd caller…..tell me why she got married?? She sounds like a nightmare to me. I feel sympathy for her husband.

@cindicleee Год назад

❤❤❤

@chronicallybriana Год назад

Sorry Nick, but you’re categorically incorrect in thinking alcohol is a “relatively safe drug with less side effects than other drugs.” Just a few weeks ago Dr. Drew said on a podcast that alcohol is the most detrimental and fastest deteriorating substance on your body and brain by a long shot. It also causes more impairment than most, brings out aggression and violence, and causes FIVE times more secondhand deaths than any other substance (through tragedies like drunk driving, improper/impaired use of weapons, alcohol poisoning, suicide, etc.) In actuality, a lot of the bad press that we hear about hard drugs is actually just propaganda or fallacies. For example, I remember growing up hearing that ecstasy can “deteriorate your brain so fast that only one time can carve an ice cream scoop hole out of it” but in the last few years, research has found that not only is that factually false, but they’ve also found that MDMA can actually *repair* synapses in the brain!

@emilystephenson5974 Год назад

please straighten the stack of books beside nick!!!!!!!

@seven92023 Год назад

Fuckboy is not an insult for men, it's a compliment. First caller is naive, her character is gone and this will crash & burn. The way she got him is the way she will lose him. This is very Brenda-Dylan-Kelly from Beverly Hills 90210 show. Second caller is for the streets. This is why open relationship on her end is a no-no. She spoke many red flags and her trauma is self-inflicted.

@Iainteasy2find Год назад

First caller is not a girl’s girl 😑

@purple492 Год назад

Callers 1 and 2…do better ladies wtf

@purehoneyy.b Год назад

I wish there was never any seat swapping or turning it honestly threw off everything haha. No diva-ness allowed at work. I know you guys are trying but I just wish there was never a change to now try to fix. And I adore the coziness for you guys but yes it's just a bit dark and you are too big time for that vibe now mr nick

@Luckygingerslots Год назад

The fish caller seems like a bad friend. Her friend would be lucky to get rid of her. All she talked about is how much better she is than her friend… get out-where within that!

@shafaghkamkar4009 Год назад

Am I being sensitive or does it seem like Nick picks up on Amanda from time to time? Cat comment, childhood psychology comment, dance comment. And it doesn’t even sound like a genuine curiosity to me. It sounds like he’s annoyed by whatever he can’t relate to in a way!

@claudiapawlak6894 Год назад

Talk about relationships when a girlfriend is so into herself. Than she has a sucker to pay for her credit. rent and food. How can you be poverty on disability when you can order 50 to 100 bottles of purple nail polish & nail glitter ? My son won't even buy clothes because of his greedy friend. She constantly cries on the phone to him at night, about her debit again ! Last week we were at a funeral , he didn't have a suit coat , because of no cooperation shopping. His grandmother gives him Christmas & Birthday money every year $400.00. Where is all that money? For her "Vina"!!!!!! Than she is interested about how much money Mom has left. Please answer this question. Mom doesn't talk to her after I was called a Dumb Bitch! The German Greed because she cannot have babies of being filled with fat. How do you break them apart ?

@sabs7824 Год назад

Is this the type of guy you would want co patenting with? Choosing 3 cups of wiskey over you everynight, means youll be taking care of the kids if not by circumstance 😢, itll be by choice. Youll love your kids more than anything in the world, and when hes drinking, youll worry about your babies❤. Think ahead, the writings on the wall😮.

@sabs7824 Год назад

Co-parenting

@kellyhorvatin Год назад

Re: dancing A friend once told me I danced like if Ellie from Up tried to dance sexy 😅🥲

@monikablue5068 Год назад

People lie about substance and alcohol. People should not stay with people if they do things that they don't want them to do such as drugs/alcohol. www.cdc.gov/alcohol/fact-sheets/alcohol-use.htm