Badass by Mistake: What Did You Do? 

I was in the Army, living in the barracks with a couple of hundred other guys. The night we returned from an especially intensive training exercise I went to bed early. A couple of hours later one of the guys was demonstrating his new boom box (this was the 80s) by cranking the volume up as far as it would go. I left my room, walked down to his room, kicked the door open, and told him if he didn't turn it down I would break the box into little pieces. He believed me and turned it down. I went back to my room. Here's the thing. I was asleep. My eyes were closed the whole time and I have absolutely no memory of doing this. Also, the door I kicked open was a steel security door. Later that week, my girlfriend called the unit after I went to bed and they told her there was NO WAY they were going to try and wake me up. Everyone was pretty sure that letting me sleep was the best idea. Also, the guy I threatened? One of my best friends in the unit. He forgave me.

I punched my friend’s broken iPhone back in high school and miraculously it turned on and has worked ever since. That’s how I got the nickname The Filipino Jesus

I was sparing in karate and did a reverse side kick, then jump front kick. I really stumbled after the reverse kick and just got my balance. It looked like the matrix scene.

"Did you ever had that badass moment by mistake." "Well..." "Doesn't count in day dreaming." "Nevermind."

I was considered to be a UNO savant when I was a kid. I never lost an UNO game ever, no matter how many of my friends I played against. We would play on the floor with the fan light above us. Turns out I could see the slightest tint of color reflecting on the back of the cards. The more they tried to fold and hide there cards the more I knew exactly what colors they had. If I saw no color I knew it was an UNO card. They never did figure out how the hell I was doing it

Everyone's talking about their own stories, but no one's mentioning peopleplepleplepleple (10:38)

Was in military at sick call and saw some kid I vaguely remembered. We chat and he starts telling me about how he was AWOL and getting in trouble. He gave me all these details that the investigators hadn't been able to get. Some high ranking guy storms over and says "you're not supposed to talk to him when he's in custody!" I said "we all have a job to do." And walked away. From that point on, everyone thought I was undercover instead of the dope I was.

So, I'm a huge history nerd that grew up weaned on the Discovery and History (or "Hitler Channel" as one of my friends liked to joke), n' considered any book dealing with history to be one of the best gifts to receive as a child. That love and interest in the subject would wane over the years, only to be reignited in my high school years where it became a guilty pleasure of mine to check out books detailing the history of other countries from the school library -- to the point where I once got embarrassed when a school librarian thought I was checking them out for a project and allowed her to think that instead of telling her, "I just like to read them...for leisure purposes..."). One day in the ninth grade, I got assigned to sit next to this big beefy football player in our history class, and...well...I earned the reputation of "the super scary Asian girl who will stab you with a pencil" because I accidentally cut the hand of the football player I was sitting next to. Yeah, you read that right. Accidentally. Cause, well...one day I got super annoyed with the football player during our history class together. He kept talking to friends when the teacher was trying to give a lesson and would playfully try to pester me a bit because I was the "super serious student trying to learn". And well, unknownst to him he didn't know that history was one of the subjects I loved to learn about, n' probably found it funny that this short Asian girl right next to him was getting more agitated by the moment with his antics. Eventually, I ended up having enough and tried telling him politely to be quiet and stop distracting me because I really wanted to learn the history lesson the teacher was giving. Of course, in return, this beefy huge football player glanced at me and decided that it's be a great idea to ask, "Or what?" To which my petite history loving ass responded with: "I'll stab you with my pencil." At the time, it was a half-joke. I really wasn't going to stab him with my mechanical pencil -- just poke him really hard with it if he refused to stop disrupting the lesson. But then, he was like, "okay. Do it then." and so, I hardened my grip on my mechanical pencil and moved it to poke his hand really hard. Not enough to cause any actual damage or draw blood...except something that hadn't occured to me was the fact that my mechanical pencil had a small metal tip at the end. When I reached out to poke him with it, the football player tried moving his hand away only for the tip of the mechanical pencil to graze the surface of his skin and cut a thin line that drew blood. Thankfully, I didn't get in trouble but both the football player and I sat there looking at his hand for a few seconds with pure comedic horror in our eyes because neither of us expected that to happen.

I was at McDonalds with my friends and as every other normal person, I bought chicken nuggets. But I had this one friend who was double my height and double my weight. Now keep in mind, I was starving like hell. This person had the audacity to steal my chicken nugget. As this my chicken nugget was about to go in their mouth. Out of sheer strength, I pulled this person's arm and hand before they ate mychicken nugget. We were at least for a minute in a deadlock, they couldn't move their hand to their mouth and keep mychicken nugget at bay from getting chomped. I rescued my chicken nugget and ate all of my food as the rest of friends stared in confusion at how the hell I defied science. Now it is apparently the go to story when people say I am weak or that they want to mess with my food.

I had a crazy childhood, dragged everywhere, my mother would take me into bars just nuts. I ended up with some dissociative moments. Well I was out with bitchy friend and a bit tipsy. She said something nasty about how I was playing pool. My brain said okay, I turned back to the table, lined up a shot and sunk it. Thank you random pool shark who taught a little kid pool tricks whoever you were.

At camp when i was 12 we were doing archery, i had some experience with a bow and good hand eye coordination, but it was pure luck that my first shot was a perfect bullseye on the furthest target. My counselor saw it and said he had never seen someone get a bullseye on their first shot, I retorted "what about two in a row" He said, "you think you could split your first arrow" while laughing. I was actually thinking about another target, but I liked the idea so I turned around and idk, but i felt confident and lucky and sure enough I put my second arrow right up beside the first one shearing off some of the feathers and scraping the side. My counselor choked on air and the archery counselor was doing double takes between me and the target, i couldn't stop grinning. I was hardly able to carry that reputation tho, usually I was off within several inches, but I could hit consistently.

Accidentally slid in the rain while driving my Jeep out of the high-school parking lot. The cop that’s always stationed by the exit was there as well. It was your standard 2in lift kit/mud tires/3in straight pipe. People know I’m into cars so when it happened and it happened very loudly people assumed I drifted out of the lot. The loud sound of “bwa bwa bwa bwa bwa bwaaaaaaa” was head turning. Got to school the next day and everyone was talking about how I drifted out of the lot doing donuts in front of the schools police officer. Instant badass.

The one with beating up the bullies with a stick sounds like something my brother would do because he actually fights with a bo staff and he is literally 7 years old and has beaten me like twenty times

Caught a chair mid air, spun around and flipped the chair perfectly then sat down without missing a beat. A kid in class was throwing a petty hissy fit over their phone being taken away and started throwing shit. Chair came flying and I caught the leg, I spun around to slow it's speed down but I guess it looked like I was showing off, then I dropped it by accident causing it to bounce and flip. Then I sat in it just so it wouldn't fly across the floor. Looked cool but was a complete accident.

I was on a skiing trip with my class and on the second day I was skiing down a hill and hit something with my foot, wich caused me to spin 180°, but I continued skiing. A moment later a teacher was skiing next to me and told me I shouldn't try to copy him because I'm not that skilled yet. I just looked at him in silent confusion then lifted my other leg and (kind of) kicked the air wich caused me to spin around 180° again and face in the direction of movement again and I came to a clean stop at the end. Now the important part : I never went skiing before this incident.

Bowling trip back in high school. I was losing badly. Finally, I just decide "fuck it, I don't care anymore". Threw off my sweater and for some reason my glasses and sloppily roll the ball and I get a strike. Never could replicate that moment, but the fact that I did a whole ass "time to get serious shtick" and ACTUALLY delivered was what got everyone, myself included.

So during nerf wars, I was one of the three people who had a sword. The two others were on the enemy team and they suddenly ambushed be at the same time. I immediately pulled by sword out and as I tried to block, I happened to hit the other guy I didn't even see, blocked, my swing was blocked and I swung again and got him. I just randomly fought in desperation and won against two people who were both older than me (we were still kids so age is pretty influential)

I was play dodgeball with my class I was never a sporty kid, in fact I’d purposely step out unnoticed when we’d play dodgeball because of my lack of skill in the game. But this time everyone got out before me, making me the only player on our team. I only had one ball in hand and noticed another rolling over the middle line towards me. The really buff kid who was next in line to get in insisted I’d go for it saying “just get one out and I’ll handle the rest” so I ran up, crouched down on one knee, and grabbed it. A kid who was know to be very sporty and a little cocky ran up to hit me with a ball however I use the ball already in my hand to deflect it while using the other to get him out and I threw it HARD. All I remember happening after that is my side screaming in sheer awe and the buff kid running in to help shouting “YES -my name- LETS GOOO” I still stepped out after that because I still didn’t have much confidence but to the buff kid I wanna say thank you for pushing me.

I was in Tae Kwon Do, and I was sparring, and I spun around, lost control and ended up slipping so that it looked like I did a back spinning kick in the air that happened to land on his head, and by some miracle landed perfectly and was able to regain my stance before he even landed on the ground. I figured out how to do it on purpose after that, so it was pretty cool.

"The moral of this story is: don't frick with my Starbursts, especially the delicious pink ones" - laughs in sugar

I have have a moment like this I was camping and everyone stated to freak out because of a GIANT spider so I walked calmly up to and flicked it away. Every then stared at me like I was a fucking GOD

One time I was on the black top playing a soccer game with my class during recess. The score was tied and we had one minute left. I was playing defense and my crush was the goalie, and when the opposing team shot the ball, it went into the air headed for the goal and I just jumped towards it and did a mid-air side kick, the ones the you would see in the movies. And then once I got on the ground I spun around and roundhouse-kicked the ball right into the other goal. My crush saw it all and everyone knew I was taking Tae-Kwon-Do so I came off the black top as a hero. Really, what happened was that I jumped cuz the ball was heading towards the goal and I didn't want to get scored on, kicked the ball by accident, spun around in confusion of where the ball went, and hit the ball powerful enough to go into the other goal. But either way my crush and I started hanging out after that day.

This isnt too impressive for a lot of people, but it was for me and my friends. I was riding with friends on my brand new 1400cc Suzuki Intruder. That thing was light in the front, torquey as hell and pretty powerful. I pulled off the side street making a left onto the highway with several other bikes behind me waiting. As I started to pull out, a car came barreling over the knoll to my right so I gunned the throttle leaning to the left. I executed a perfect left arc wheelie and then straightened it out. I brought the front end down velvet smooth, hit second and went on my way. At the next stop they were asking things like "..where did you learn to ride like that?" I told them it was unintentional but they wouldn't believe me. To be honest, it scared the shit out of me.

When I was younger, my mom took me to a family friend’s house. They had two sons, one and two years older than me. They had one or two other dudes over. They were basically forced to allow me to participate when they all went outside to shoot BBs at each other. I’m a girl and they were mostly focused on shooting each other, so I was basically ducking behind trees and crap, taking shots where I could and watching them ignore me. Well, I’m crouched behind some cover and I notice one dude holed up in a plastic play thing. I can see him through this tiny crack and he’s facing away from me. So I shot him. The look on his face when he turned and saw me, shooting at him through a crack about as wide as my pointer finger, was priceless. I also beat his brother at air hockey and go carting on a separate occasion. Dude tried to run me off the tracks in a spot where the cart operator couldn’t see. I dodged. He spun out. The operator saw him spin out, assumed I did it, and hit the switch to slow my cart (standard punishment for fowl play). I still won.

14:48 I have a similar story. There's a gym storage shed out by the baseball field at my school that's shut with a chain and padlock, and when we went out to the field for class, the teachers couldn't find the key. I ran back inside, grabbed two wrenches from the woodshop, came back out, and using the double wrench method, I managed to break the lock open in about 5 seconds. Everyone stared at me like I was some highly experienced burglar/car thief.

I took a slapshot that bounced off a kid's skate and went into the goal. I became the Assist King of Smith Court (street hockey) to the 4 of us who were there.

I was visiting my partner to deliver lunch while she was working in a high school. The kids asked a bunch of questions about my home country, and about how we has strange coins. I told a girl across the room 'catch', pulled out a $2 coin and thumb-flicked it across the room. I was expecting her to move to catch it and for the coin to be close at best, but she stayed still and it was a solid landing right in her palm. I used to play marbles a lot as a kid so I guess it was muscle memory? I didn't react at all as they collectively lost their minds, told her "Keep it." and moved on to answer the next question. The next time I was there a paper that was up on a board with a magnet started sliding down, and I took a magnet and flung it at the board in a split second moment of instinct. It hit the paper and secured it. It was just luck, but it was fun that it happened. Blew their minds.

One time I was chosen as someone that sensei that my cousins chose to learn self defense from and when he threw his first hit I got so scared that I stepped back and lost my footing but caught myself at the last moment,then I got back up like nothing happened. It was filmed by one of my family members with a phone and it looked like something out of the Matrix somewhat.

4 years ago when I worked at Taco Bell, my old friend Travis payed me a visit from the front counter. He asked for a cup of water and there was a stack between us. I grabbed one and tossed it to him. It bounced off the stack of cups and landed directly in his open hand. Another time about 3 weeks ago, my sister and I parked next to each other in separate cars and had to share her pen to fill out paperwork. When I gave it back to her, I tossed it through our windows and it bounced off her gear shifter directly onto her clip-board. Both times they looked at me like I was a Jedi

I remember back when I was in an archery club, forever ears ago, one of the other members managed to do a 'Robin Hood' by shooting an arrow right into the back of another arrow.

Vast amount of times where my incredible reflexes take action. Never deliberately but at random times where someone throws something to me or at me i catch or deflect them. It's honestly crazy and anyone who's witness is astonished. Idk where it even comes from but it's like a scene from the matrix every time

I was playing in what was called the volleyball circle, pretty selfexplanitory, and the ball had gone way far away. My friend was next to me, talking to some people outside of the circle, and didn't see that someone had served the ball. I thought that it was coming to me and I accidentally caught the ball instead of hitting it and I caught it right before it hit my friend in the head.

Was playing Kho-Kho in school and I was a runner(The one who should escape from the chaser catching me). A chaser found I was looking in the opposite direction so ran towards me to catch me with his arm stretched so i can't run sideways and just then I somehow turned back , and realized it was too late to start running. Then suddenly my reflexes somehow worked magically and low-key bent backwards without my hands touching the ground like in the matrix and got up managing not to get caught(all of this happened in like 5 seconds). The chaser's face was in shock , the whole class thought I was some Kho-kho champion. It was just a small dodge , but it was enough for me to get recommended for Kho-Kho captain for the match next month and we actually won. That semester I was treated like God.

I went on a school trip once and one of the activities was archery. I didn’t know a thing about archery and honestly I wasn’t looking forward to it. Everyone got three practice shots before we started playing competitively. I was one of the last to go and, completely by luck, managed to get all 3 on the innermost circle in a row. Even the guide was impressed and asked me if I had done archery before, I said no and he said that it looked like I must’ve been practicing a lot of archery before. (P.S, I’m one of the quiet kids in school that no one really talks to and the popular kid was in my group and he just stood there dumbfounded because he is usually the best at everything and to have a low-life beat him was pretty rare lol)

I was playing airsoft once and was reloading my pistol with a suppressor, and sometimes it wouldn’t fire for some reason so I was just testing if it was shooting and I was on top of a snipers nest at the back of the map with my back to the wall and I put the pistol through the window while still looking away and fired it (yeah I know that’s like stupid or smth), and I hear it shoot and I pulled the pistol back to in front of me and randomly decide to take off the suppressor cause I didn’t like the weight or whatever and while I was taking it off and putting it back into my pocket I hear someone shout “HIT!” and my friend was staring out the window with their mouth open and then just looked at me and said: “well, you got him” I felt like John Wick

Two such instances. First was when a new kid joined our junior high class, a tall, handsome guy who grew up in Germany and was a junior tennis pro. We became friends and he invited me to play a game of tennis at lunch... I love watching it but I'd never so much as held a racket to that point yet up I go with a bunch of our friends watching. He says I can serve first. Without a clue but trying to emulate Agassi, I tossed the ball up and served a perfect ace - he and everyone else were so impressed and I was just standing there like 'how tf did I do that?' Second was worse/better. I was in air cadets as a gawky teen, and remember we played some kind of capture the flag game where the senior cadets (sgts, flight sgts, etc.) were up against the juniors. We could 'kill' our opponents by stealing coloured kerchiefs that were tied on everyone's arms. The six seniors ran roughshod over the two dozen or so juniors as they were all older and quite a bit bigger, and finally it was just me against the remaining four. They all came at me at once and I just ducked and dodged and by some miracle after 30 seconds I had four kerchiefs in my hand and they were just furious while the juniors were all screaming and hooting. Greatest moment of a 12 year old's life, showing up the older kids.

13:21 Reminds me of the time that I was in science talking about how it would be funny if my tooth (last baby tooth left) came out in this stale Laffy Taffy. Five minutes later it came out while I was in the middle of softening up a lump of grape. I spit it out in my hand and we all just kind of looked at it before I wrapped it in some tissues and threw it away.

7:20 THIS LITERALLY REMINDED ME OF A MEMORY THAT I THOUGHT WAS GONE FOREVER. so, same as them, it was during recess in elementary school and dodgeball also worked in a ring, dodgers inside, throwers outside. I was one of three last dodgers. I dodged a ball, but because of that, I ended up directly in front of a thrower with a ball who threw it immediately. Out of pure reflex I ducked down, the ball dodged my head and hit a dodger behind me. It was so cool that the teacher paused the game, acknowledged how great of a dodge that was, then continued the game. 😎

I was still in school, year 10, and I had this pair of glasses that caused people to call me the Terminator constantly. One day, when we were out eating by the field, an older student comes up and calls me that - maybe twenty students are listening and some teachers - without looking, I pointed to the tree line behind me said calmly, "and there's my chopper" and seconds later a helicopter appears over that same tree line, flying low and proceeds to try and land in the field less than twenty meters in front of me. Everyone stared in shock, pretty sure some people fell off their benches. It turns out I was the only one that heard its approach.

Not me, but my dad had a very "Badass by Mistake" situation. In his first year of high school my dad got called out by the "delinquent" leader who was in his second year. My dad has this face of a trouble maker but he's actually a very kind supportive person. The delinquent called out to my dad afterschool to fight, and since this was back in those days where kids didn't have much to do, a bunch of other kids were around to see them fight. My dad didn't want to look like a wimp so he went through with the idea to fight. Just to let you know, my dad has never fought someone in his life. My dad however, with luck by his side, managed to hit the delinquent's temple on his first swing. My dad knocked him out instantly, and was treated as some sort of "boss" for the entirety of his high school. Now it would be cool to end it here, but my dad had a funny moment later. He actually got into another fight, by another wannabe delinquent, but he didn't want to fight nor did he want to walk away to look like he chickened out. What he ended up doing was trying to intimidate with words to make him back off. The wannabe delinquent, only knowing my dad as the guy who knocked out someone with one hit, was too afraid to start the fight... but also didn't want to back away. What ended up happening was just my dad and this wannabe delinquent cursing at each other and just calling it a day without ever fighting each other again. The first story is something I wouldn't believe my dad did, but the second one is exactly what I expect my dad to do.

I once accidentally won a basketball game with my family by clumsily dodging everyone while trying to get my footing, then finally getting my footing and throwing the ball into the hoop. I also once jumped over one of my family members and combat rolled after jumping over them, then ran to score the winning touch down due to adrenaline and out of nowhere good reflexes due to my fear of getting tackled/hurt during a family game of football.

My friends accidentally moved a big cement block by accident. They were panicking since you're not supposed to move it since the school Director would get mad. They tried moving it together but they weren't able to. I was walking by and found them almost crying since they can't even move it. I tried lifting it by myself and was a bit successful, I was able to lift it in a short span of time and was able to put it back to it's rightful place. Keep in mind that that piece of cement was about the size of my own body and it was pretty thick too. When I was done with it I saw them with faces of astonishment and surprise. I wasn't the healthiest kid in our class, I had Asthma and Rhinitis and I wasn't the sportiest one in class either. And I guess they were surprised since in our class it's expected that the men would do the heavy lifting and the females do other stuff. I think that they were surprised since a single female student was able to do what they, a group of men weren't able to do. I didn't think that much about that stereotype in class so I wasn't aware that it was new to them. It was a weird situation but at least I was able to help them.

I went to a party that one of my friends was hosting ( I was 12 then) and my friend lives really in the middle of no where, and the men were shooting a glock 17 if I remember correctly and were missing terribly and my friend goes up there, takes one shot and says ow, let Camden shoot it. Now my friend forgot to mention that my father is a police officer and trained me in handguns since I was like five so I go up there and double tap all of the handgun targets and then clear the weapon and hand it to whoever was going to shoot next. Needless to say I silenced most of the adults that were saying I wouldn’t be able to stand the kick Another one. I was going north to meet my great uncle for the first time, a giant of a man, an avid hunter and a Vietnam veteran that served in an artillery crew, and a collector of guns. He set up a playing card (ace of spades, his favorite card) on a thick wooden board, handed me a .22 revolver and said now shoot the spade. But I decided that I wanted to shoot a push pin

I've always been a nerd and got enthusiastic for programming as soon as I had my first C64 as a kid. Decades later when I tidied up I stumbled upon my old C64 Assembler (for non-nerds: very low level programming language) book, had it as a good night lecture and it was all back. Literally the next morning a friend of mine called. He had found and repaired his old C64, had tried to program a matrix-like screensaver in Basic (higher level, yet quite slow language) but it was painfully slow. So I went over, wrote a basic loader, his whole program in numeric assembler data lines, started it and it worked like a charm immediately. Not a single typo, not a single endless loop, nothing. As I mentioned I actually am a nerd. Since then for this guy I'm the godfather of nerdiness. :-D All due to a combination of coincidence, lucky typing and a very simple problem to solve.

Years ago, in high school, I was talking to some friends in the hall. A guy I knew walked up and went to hit me on the arm to get my attention. I just saw a blur of movement and reflexively raised my hand. I just happened to block his hand. I went to put my hand back down and happened to block his hand a second time as he attempted to hit me again, but lower. I again reflexively raised my hand and caught his hand as he attempted to hit me a 3rd time, but higher. It all happened in a split second and was a complete and utter coincidence, but appeared like I blocked three attempts to hit me in rapid succession without even looking. He was like "whoa..." and I just played it off with a smile.

not me but a friend of mine from several years ago when i was in boy scouts. we were on the archery range at Scout Camp, shooting at 3D animal targets. My Buddy and I are right next to each other. he shoots an arrow and it goes right into the eye socket of a 3D Fox. still don't know how he did that and i'm pretty sure he doesn't either.

I was playing basketball in gym for fun with some of my classmates, as I get the ball I dribble between two enemies, try to throw the ball in the net but dropped it, it flew underneath another dude from the opposite team who tried to block it and manage to take the ball again and shoot it perfectly in the goal… I suck at basketball and honestly surprised myself after that believing I had become the chosen one.

Oooh I finally have a story for one of these. One time I was playing tag with a couple of friends in the gym in middle school. I was being chased but there were badminton nets up all across the court. As I was running about to be caught, out of pure instinct, I slid underneath a net without even touching it and the guy chasing me stopped behind the net. They nicknamed me Tom Cruise for the rest of the day.

Playing rugby, tackled a guy in my class, he got mad cause he went from full speed to on the ground, he punched my chin as hard as possible and I just laughed. I didn't feel it cause I was sleep deprived and kinda zoinked out of my mind. This was back when I played games all night and always sleep deprived, one time I even hallucinated the game in real life, freaky.

I was walking down the 18th fairway finishing up a company golf tournament. A friend of mine who had already finished was sitting on a bench on the patio, enjoying a cold one and giving me the gears as I walked by. I told him to stand up, trying to make a bad joke and implying that he was too drunk to stand. He stood up. What I didn't realize was that he was sitting on the very end of the bench, and when he stood up, the bench flipped up and dumped the guy sitting on the other end. People thought that I had asked him to stand up because I knew that the bench would flip over and dump the other guy. Everyone thought it was hilarious, and my reputation went up a notch or two.

I was at karate class hanging out with the younger students and there was a wolf spider crawling around on the floor, none of us were wearing shoes and no one wanted to get near it, but i stepped on the spider killing it, they were so impressed all the kids followed me for the rest of the day like little ducklings all in line lol

What Fizjig really did was use their telepathic abilities to know what movements the senior kid was planning to execute, then dodged appropriately while simultaneously using the fact that all eyes were on them to their strategic advantage to telekinetically displace the senior kid's backpack so as to cause the senior kid to miss the swing, trip over his own backpack, and hurl himself into a wall of lockers in gloriously cartoonish fashion, even rounded off with the sound of a gong.

Turning The Doorhandle Up When Opening A Door.

It wasn't so much a threat, but it was a matter of fact: I simply told a couple bullies who always threatened to come to people's houses to beat them up (but it was always bullshit- you can't take the wrong school bus to people's neighborhoods anyway) that I knew the law, that my mother was a sheriff, that because of this she taught me where the gun was stored, how to load it, how to turn off safety, how to hold it, and how to aim, and if they came to my home I would use it on all three of them and get away with it. Apparently, this was a bad idea to say since they told everyone else what I said, which resulted in a discussion with some teachers (because America - student - guns), but when I told them exactly what the bullies told me (which they often threatened everyone else with) and then what I responded with and the stand your ground state law, I (extremely surprisingly) didn't get in trouble at all, and the teachers just wound up warning the students that if they ever tried, then because my mother was a cop I would likely do exactly what I said, and there would be nothing staff could do to stop me because it would be happening off school grounds and they would be literally putting themselves in harm's way. My friends were often bullied by such threats from the popular kids, so after that they would just hang around me and all the popular kids would leave them alone since they all knew of that incident. From then on for some reason everyone had the impression that because my mother was a sheriff then I knew self-defense, was a marksman, and that I could get away with murder... No... it's just that I forgot I could fucking call the police instead.

Was I the only one laugh through out this whole video? 😂 they were just freak accidents perfectly executed

I played a chess game with my chess-addicted friend. I was doing completely random (but allowed, I knew the basics) moves, only to end the game with my king in stalemate while my friend’s king, queen, knight, two bishops, and rook surround me. Not only was it badass by mistake, but the look of pain and frustration on my friend’s face was priceless.

I worked a security job when I was young. A guy tried to attack the general manager one night so out of reaction I punched him but as he saw my Punch coming he tried to duck down towards me as he was winding up to hit me but somehow he managed to dive straight into my fist so the impact was extremely hard. In fact it was so hard I remember my arm was sore all through the middle section like it strained a muscle the next day. Anyways it just exploded his face and he had a broken nose blood all over two black eyes it just looked terrible. Everybody at the club I worked at after that thought I was the hardest hitting person on Earth and basically told everybody not to mess with me. It may or may not have gotten me laid as well. 😏

My family and I went to Disneyland for years. 6 years to be exact. We went to a 24 hour event for Disneyland's 60th birthday. I was 10 at the time. Some kid nearby was throwing a fit, pulling things off the shelves and throwing them at people. This kid was 4, had obvious behavioral issues and seemed to have autism. When the kid accidentally slipped I went to go catch them but ended up tripping. Instead of landing on my face, I ended up rolling and pulling a superhero pose, and caught him. He thought I was so cool and asked if I was the son of the falcon and I didn't want to break his heart, especially with how he calmed down and his eyes were practically shining so I told him yeah and that he couldn't tell anyone. I accidentally became this kids hero. I think about that kid a lot. I am now 16, and I plan on becoming a cosplayer to truly become who he thought I was.

my teacher threw a chalk at me. caught it with 2 fingers by fluke. i played along, flicked it, gave a sly smile, reversed my cap and sat. the entire class was cheering. the look on the teachers face was remarkable. he happened to throw another one, which just landed in my mouth. spat it. the entire class just lost it. i got the name chalk intercepter.

Once in high school, I was messing about in the back of my English classroom when the bell rang. I raced to the front of the class where my desk was and sat down. At first, I didn't realize one of my classmates staring at me, but when I did, she simply said "Jess, you should be a superhero". Being accused of having superpowers was definitely the most unintentionally badass thing I've ever done.

I was part of a bowling team in HS, and it was towards the end of the season. I was the anchor and it was the deciding game. I gotten 2 strikes and then 8 pins and EVERYONE bursts into cheers, it actually made me jump in surprise, because I didn’t realize I won the game by exactly 1 pin and my team and I were going to go to the state tournament.

Finally, one that is short enough that I will answer. At summer camp, our cabins were meant to fit 20 people, but because this was right after covid started dying down, (summer of 2021) we only had a total of 8 bunks used. We decided on the second week that it would be a great idea to make a fighting ring in the corner of the room with all the extra mattresses as the floor padding and the empty bunks as the ropes. Three rounds in and it’s my turn to fight, and my opponent is the winner of the previous rounds, strictly because the kid weighed 160 pounds and sat on their opponent to subdue them. I get in the ring avoiding at all costs falling onto the mattresses as that meant game over. At one point, he lunges at me and I grab him by the shoulder and throw him onto his back (Am a tiny dude so was surprised by this, but this was only the beginning). After throwing him down, I hugged my feet under the mattress below us and proceeded to gag him out with my armpit. Minutes late we found him throwing up in the bathroom from being gagged out and from there on, I was known as “The Demon”

Back when i used to skate i remember showing one of my friends a trick i had learned, after landing it with the adrenaline pumping i said now watch this, and attempted another trick i had never landed before and miraculously landed it and pretended like it was intentional and my friend was amazed at how good i had gotten lol

15:00 imagine lock picking lawyer doing a 20 second video with a credit card as his only tool.

The snowboarding one reminds me of my first time snowboarding as a special few day group learning thing, we were learning how to turn 180 then turn back, I somehow ended up just keeping going and did a 360 instead

When I was in middle school, we were playing ultimate frisbee outside for gym when someone chucked the thing really fast accidentally at a girls head. With a mixture of good reflexes, pain tolerance and INCREDIBLE luck, I caught the thing one handed, which hurt horribly, RIGHT IN FRONT of the lady’s face. I then passed it back into the game. We lost, but my classmates treated me like a hero that day.

I tripped and ended up saving the volleyball from hitting the ground and the game ending. It hit my foot, and everyone thought I had stepped forward to receive it with my foot since I couldn’t get it with my arms. I told everyone I tripped, no one believed me.

I was in 6th grade and was not a very brawny person but I felt someone punch me in the side of the head, it was literature class going on, I then overreacted and punched him 4 times, on the 4th time I punched him so hard he fell over and was just crying on the floor. He was bigger than me as well. I then just started down at my hands and I just felt this surge of power tingling through my fingers. Everyone was talking about it for weeks, someone said that after I did that I just stared down at my hands with this intense look on my face. I barely spoke to anyone at lunch because I really felt bad for the boy I punched, I was and still am friends with him. I was usually the calmest and most well behaved person at school according to the teachers but I just felt a surge of power and then I punched someone harder than I’ve ever done before. There was this tension in the air for the rest of the day before I had to leave school.

10:40 has a glitch

I took class in high school that was basically graphic design/ learning photoshop and one day my class got “hired” by the school to redesign the logo for the district’s yearly art festival thing (basically they take a whole mess of kid’s art work from all over the district and do some art gallery thing that they’ve been doing for years) and I knew whatever I was going to come up with wouldn’t win because everyone else in my class were much more creative then I was. So I just threw something together in 30 minutes that would’ve given me at least a good grade for the class and left it at that. Fast forward a few classes later and I come to find out my no effort logo WON and it ended up becoming the official logo. I definitely wasn’t expecting that and I almost felt bad because of how little effort I put into this compared to everyone else who was actually trying. I know this story isn’t much but it’s something I’ll always find funny (it did give me a well needed confidence boost tho-)

Bully was talking crap at my presentation I had dead eye contact with him from the other side of the room, he picked up a base ball from his backpack and threw it at me With an angry face and both hands on the teachers table infront of the class I just moved my arm and grabbed the ball about to hit my face and banged it down on the desk without breaking eye contact

I never really remember me doing an accidental bad butt moment, but it’s nice to hear people talk about it

Ooo i have one, i have what known as eds or ellers danlos syndrome so my joints are crap and im used to resetting some smaller sub dislocations cus they happen so often anyway, when i was in high school i was in gym and we were doing weight training (this was the day i learned i cant do weight training) and i wound up dislocating my shoulder only i didnt fully realize it (i have a vary high pain tolerance) and thought it was a normal sub dislocations so i fixed how i normally do wich i me flexing my shoulder muscles while holding/pushing it in place when its being particularity stubborn so i did that it olny felt slightly different from how it normally was but i payed it no mind and asked the teacher for a pass to the nurse for some ice, i then look around to see everyone in the room just staring at me and was like "what??" noone said anything thing but i had people coming up to asking if i was the person who reset there own dislocation hardly anyone tryed anything after that even tho i did think it was a big deal Edit spelling

I am visually impaired and my ophthalmologist and I didn't realize I could benefit from a 48 inch cane (I'm 5'4" tall) that I roll along the ground as I walk, until 6 years after I went into remission from cancer. I'd had the cane for around 6 months and went to NYC with the media group at the college I was enrolled in. We were walking through the streets one morning and the people and traffic were hectic. Our media advisor had me walking in the front of our group, because with my swinging, rolling cane, MOST people were clearing the way from in front of us. We came to one crossway, and to the left of us were several trashcans and a ton of people, and the right was fenced off. The only pathway was straightforward. However, there was a woman standing in the narrow passageway, who was turned facing the fence, with a cup of coffee, carrying on a conversation with some friends. I said, "Excuse me." She ignored me. A little louder, "EXCUSE me?" She looked at me, glanced down at my cane, then went back to talking with her friends. One last time, "EXCUSE ME?" Nothing. I took my cane and lightly tapped her leg just above her ankle bone. She jumped, looked down at her ankle, then started talking with her friends again. I took my cane and just below her knee tapped her a bit harder two more times and she still didn't move. I reached back with my cane and gave her a final, heavy frap on the leg. She jolted to the right, looked down at her leg, and I pushed by her with my group. (When I hit her that last time, it was harder than I intended, because I didn't realize my cane would gain momentum in a swing like that!) For the remainder of the time I was in college, everyone teased me, "Don't tick off, Ashley! She'll whack you with her cane!" TL;DR: I use a mobility cane for my visual impairment and once whacked a lady in NYC with it, because she was blocking off the sidewalk and refused to move.

Gangsta's paradise would be a good backround song for this

I was once in Gym class. All of our after school activities had been cancelled because of a bad thunderstorm. We had to wait for a good 30 minutes to an hour to be dismissed for the day. I was bored and h*ll and decided to grab a basketball and shoot some hoops. I was the only one playing, so I was still bored. I ended up trying to pull some trick shots. I decided to try and get the ball up, through the supports, over the backboard, and into the hoop... I made it... The hoop was NBA height... Only a few people saw me the first time, and I was hyped over my success, so I tried again... I made it again... Decided to try it a third time... Didn't make it... Had to dodge or risk taking a freshly inflated basketball to the face.

10:45 error text to speech.exe not found

I was student teaching a 3rd grade class. During science I was explaining what to do with the experiment supplies, one of the items was an empty plastic bottle. I lost my grip on it and it flipped in the air and landed right side up on a table. The whole class lost their minds in astonishment while I was red faced and embarrassed. It took a while to get the class to listen again.

Got a dodgeball snipe I was near the mid back dodging grabbed a ball then I got a snipe on their best player.

The only accidental badassery I've done is in video games, one moment the boss was shredding me, and then I proceeded to do his hardest attack FLAWLESSLY

10:35 excuse me???

When I was 17 I was bullied too much. One day in bio lab one of the bully decided to through dissecting needle at me. I saw it on time & just casually tried to catch as we were on two different corners it could have been lethal. Surprisingly I caught it with two fingers with the tip of the needle in between. Everyone saw it & clapped. So it was my badass moment.

I was playing B.O.4 casualy and then I noticed that there was a ranked thing but I had 1st play out everyone and I got a 4 win streak.

I was bullied in elementary school, by basically all of my class. Some of them always played soccer during playtime. Sometimes there were accidents where a child not involved in the game was hit by the ball right in the head and cried, but no one was punished since it was always by accident. It ended up happening to me and they thought it was funny, so they started having fun shooting the ball at me every time they saw me. But you know, I was used to be bullied so I adapted pretty quickly to each of their ideas. After figuring out what they were doing, I was vigilant, and I could dodge the ball. I dodged it several times, but eventually they managed to shoot it so it was aimed directly at my head while I was walking. I saw it too late and couldn't dodge it so I just raised my arm to protect myself. The palm of my hand happened to be directly in the path of the ball and stopped it. The movement was so clean and precise it looked like it was calculated to the nearest inch. I was like "oh, okay" and I just continued on my way as if nothing had happened, idk why, probably because I was myself confused and had nothing else to do. They all looked at me with wide eyes then started muttering "what ?" and things like that. Then they just stopped trying to hit me with a ball, and leaved me alone for the rest of the day.

Apparently I flipped off the vice principal in middle school in front of an entire class. I was trying to clean crusty sleep sand or something out of both eyes and the middle finger is just longer and my nose is less in the way of it than my pointer finger so that happened without thinking (it didn't help that I was ridiculously innocent-minded at the time, nor that the vice principal just showed up midway through cleaning out my eyes when I couldn't see). Got two days of detention for it and was super confused and upset when I got called to the office afterward, but at least the other kids thought I was a badass?

We had a game night back in the first few weeks of college. I was playing against this guy in Rocket League, and we were neck and neck. He was up a point on me with just a few seconds left on the clock. I was lined up on the center line, so I just said to myself, "Screw it," and hit the boost for the ball. I just so happened to get there first, and the ball sailed over his team and into the goal just as the clock hit zero, forcing us into overtime. He ended up winning not long after, but I still remember how awesome it was to have the other guys cheering me on.

(Im a girl)Was playing capture the flag with a tag mixed in it, at my boyfriends church. So we had our flag protected cuz we couldn't hide it like the other team. The other team had all the big seniors and juniors while we had the middle schoolers. So the biggest senior(male and sports player) decided to make a break for our flag. I saw so I gave chase and I'm in no way athletic but I barely tapped his backed and tripped on my own feet. Somehow the momentum of the fall made me roll perfectly into a cool pose. Needless to say I felt badass after that Another one on the same day was us playing dodgeball. The boys had to stay in a square on the floor while the girls could roam. Since school only had one fun sport I had gotten quite good at dodging what they threw, after a while it was just me and the two junior boys I was protecting. My body was like yep time to go beast mode and continued to hit everyone else on the other side. I got the respect of everyone there and felt awesome.

Time stamps 0:33 is the monster hunter 2:17 is kung fu 3:36 is cigarette catch 4:35 person breaks older persons arm 5:07 is ninjutsu 6:08 pool master 8:09 phone ninja 12:09 starburst 17:41 locker fight

Horrified an entire school for bad azz kids.put my bully through a pool table.jaws hit floor

When I did snowboarding, I wasn't always the best at it but one time a skier once crossed her skis and fell over. I proceed to accidentally go over her skis and do a front flip and a 720. Lots of cheers from everyone.

I was out on a group nature walk with my high school class (the only one we did in high school). I wasn't paying attention, and I ended up stepping on a rattlesnake (we were in central Texas). I realized I had done so when I suddenly heard the distinct rattle, and I almost panicked as I went ramrod stiff. My classmates thought I was cool...because it turned out I had stepped on it in such a way that I had pinned its head under my foot (I was actually on what could be consider its neck, so I really had pinned its head). The teacher was able to come around and get a good grip on the head, allowing me to step off. He then took it aside and released it, whereupon it slithered away. No one was bitten. The only bad@$$ moment I took from it was that I didn't sh^t myself when it happened (the urge was definitely there).

The dodge ball story is like mine, I was in kindergarten and all my teammates had gotten out. I was alone... almost the entire other team was there. I looked somewhere else and back to find a ball was flying 100 mph straight at my face. I put my hands up to protect my face and caught the ball by accident... since this was kindergarten, everyone got to join back in instead of just one person, so it was like in the movies where the team picks up the player who got the winning shot or something. They all gathered around me and I was praised for a good 2 seconds before we played more. Best memory I have of kindergarten. I forgot about that for a while.

I remember my school had a dormitory sports day, everyone had to participate. I was put in the netball team along with many netball school athletes. The team leader rolled her eyes when it's my time to play. During the game, I wanted to shoot at the leader cause she's open, lose sight of that ball after I shoot and wondered where it went (and envisioning my apology for messing up). Next thing I knew everyone cheered me and the team leader let me play the second game. Turns out I scored the net while my feet was still on the opposing team's goal. Complete accident but felt good with all the praise and attention I got.

When I was in Uni, I had a teacher who was not what I - a homeschooled Christian kid - expected a teacher to be. He cursed constantly, showed us horror movies he enjoyed, and made fun of people in class. My reaction to this was part amusement at the novelty and part horror because I didn’t know how to respond to it. As such, whenever he acted that way, I would do as blank an expression as possible, while also dealing with these conflicting emotions inside me. Also, having been homeschooled, I grew up with people of all ages - my friends (church, co-op, extracurriculars, etc.), their parents, their older and younger siblings, etc., so I was used to speaking to adults and they didn’t generally intimidate me. When an adult asked me a question, I told them the truth, even if it wasn’t what they wanted to hear. I treated them as equal to me. So the combination of this odd facial expression and my willingness to say “Dude, what the heck was that?” made this teacher think I was some kind of smart-@$$ (he told me so… and I kind of was tbh) but I did such a good job in his class that he also totally changed his mind about homeschooling. I was just fumbling to know what to do, but I came off as this straight-talking kid who didn’t care what anyone thought. He eventually told me I was one of the best students he’s ever had, and we became pretty good friends. I still go visit him sometimes.

I was playing a friendly cricket match one time and it seemed like everyone was getting really heated about the game, due to there being existing tensions with the rivaling team. their bowlers, as a result, proceeded to take down our remaining batters except for me a few overs out from the end of the inning. it was just me and a heavy hitter making runs now for a solid 3 overs, and I am a notoriously bad batsman, but notoriously fast sprinter, so everyone expected the strategy in which we attempted to keep the heavy hitter on strike, and thats is what we were doing aswell. that is, until I randomly closed my eyes when the ball was coming during final over and was like fuck it let's see where this goes, and I swung and hit a 6, and all of my friends go off in the stands. I later get off after the first inning and they proceed to tell me I was holding the bat backwards when I started, and hand turned the bat around as the ball came at me which added centrifugal power to the ball causing 6 to be made. everyone knew it was by mistake cus it was me doing it, but I was still a badass

at my school, you were required to try out for the geography bee. i had no idea there was a bee at all, and just thought i was taking a standardized test. i made it past class, school, and county level. i made it to my state-level geography bee and had no clue what i was doing

12:49 I can’t be the only one that laughed at this

One time in gym we were playing California kickball indoors. Me and another kid who everybody hated for being mean we’re running for the ball and we collided. He ended up breaking his ankle and embarrassing himself in front of everybody. People thought I tackled him on purpose, but the teachers didn’t so I didn’t get in trouble. Got mad respect for that one.

One of the many carpentry classes I took with my friend while in high school, we walked into the shop and some pop station is playing on the radio. I'm predominantly a metal head, so I don't like it. I walk up to the radio, exclaiming, "F*** this s**I!" Spin the tune dial (pne of the kind that tunes the radio 1 increment at a time), and it lands perfectly on the classic rock station right as the first guitar notes of "Bad to the Bone". Unfortunately, my friend and I were at the front of the line of people going in, so he was my only witness. TL;DR: I was the Fonze once, and basically I'm the only one who knows.

During lunch, my friends, not me included, were tossing the chocolate milk carton around with each other. One of them accidentally passed it to me, and me, being annoyed, threw the carton through a small hole surrounded by a gate and lined bars, and made it through. At my angle, which was sitting down, it required a near perfect throw, and hand movement so that the carton didn’t sway to make it through. What’s even worse that it landed bottom first, and I did it on accident. If you wanted me to do that again, I wouldn’t have made that shot no matter how many times to do it.