BEST OF ZACH'S HYPOTHETICALS 

I love that no matter what you do in Zach’s hypothetical he will always desperately try to convince you that you picked the wrong option

I love when the initial hypothetical is not at all tricky to answer, and Zach just keeps adding details to try and make the hypothetical more or less tempting.

it still gets me whenever I hear the “If a big SUV ran over your head and destroyed it, do you think you’d be entitled to self defense?” hypothetical.

Tweety Bird and Jim Crow in the same hospital room on life support is the most schizophrenic scenario I have ever heard

Zach adding "tiny" or "little" before everything makes it 23% funnier

I like how Zach doesn't even attempt to make a legitimate case as to why a surgically-implanted pee meter would be desirable or beneficial.

I really want Zach to host a D&D campaign. He would mentally break his players in one session

43:53 Absolutely love the idea of a grown adult being accused of lying for years to their partner and responding to the accusations with “nuh uh”

I want a show of Zach as a genie, except instead of granting wishes, he just follows the guy around presenting hypothetical compromises until he finally accepts one and it becomes real

My favorite part is that Zach always contradicts their answer by going “you would really do that?!” regardless of the answer

I'm 100% convinced Zach is a banished trickster god, because without realizing I find myself eerily tempted by a lot of these. Also it's amazing how invested Chris, Tomar and Lyle get in them.

My favorite Zach hypothetical gimmick is when he asks a question and the answer is "no" and he tries to sweeten the deal by adding something objectively much worse. "Would you be ok if you had a meter on your body that showed when you were full of pee?" "What, no" "Ok but what if you also had one for poop"

Zach’s hypotheticals are more like choose your own adventure books except made by a genuine psychopath.

Man, 2 hours of Zach going "Tomar, would you", followed by Tomar going "I dunno"? That's amazing.

I love how 1.) Zach actually made a reference to the movie Cube. 2.) proceeds to tell Tomar its a movie about people turning into cubes, which is not what its about 3.) moves on without even letting anyone realize how dumb and untrue that is. He is so used to gaslighting at this point that he doesn't even remember its a joke

Amazing how Zach put the annoying alien hypothetical into Smiling Friends, complete with the punching reaction

We all need a friend like Zach who just throws unprompted hypotheticals at us

The little alien that shoves his hands in your face has to have been the origin of Jeremy in smiling friends

I love how on the IQ point increase question, Zach is actually haggling with Tomar and Chris about how many points up they could go, as if he really could raise their IQ with magic, but is somehow constrained as to how much he can offer them

"Tomar yes or no, you are a tech wizard who basically loves gizmos, gadgets and fun puzzle games. You love tinkering with gizmos am I wrong or am I fucking right Tomar" has to be the best one 😭

Tomar's response to the self defense question about getting ran over is the most emotion i have ever heard from him outside of voice acting. He gets so mad about how absurd the question is and i love it.

It’s both awesome and scary how Zach has his own show now. The possibilities are endless…

41:30 Zach throws in the rule “you have to say mommy” with no explanation before abandoning the idea

I gotta give it up to Zach, the hypothetical of being entitled to self defense if Tomar's head got crushed by a car at 10:39 is one of the funniest things I've ever heard on youtube.

I love the quiet "the truth finally fucking comes out" after asking Tomar if he would eat tree stars.

I've used the "Doge being injected with black tar" scenario on people and it usually reveals their true colors

Tomar is always the perfect straight man for Zach’s insane hypotheticals. Like he actually takes it seriously and considers the question logically even when it makes zero sense.

Zach is gonna make One Million Dollars from smiling friends, and Tomar is gonna have to get "Tomar #1" engraved on his forehead.

The only thing that can truly frighten Tomar is when Zach turns to ask him something. “What horrible scenario is he going to put me through today” he thinks

Best of Oneyplays hypotheticals: 47 minutes Best of Zach hypotheticals: 2 hours. Seems legit.

It's always a little creature that breathes heavily

0:00:05 Tomar eating tree stars 0:01:12 Tomar does not acknowledge the Zeta-Reticulon 0:01:49 Tomar's AI runs a diagnostic 0:03:14 Adam's Diet Dr Pepper can cock 0:04:06 "If you showed that to a chimp, do you think he'd freak out?" 0:04:14 Chris and the robo - mouse 0:05:06 Sentient fleshlight 0:06:04 Tomar watching a video of his actual real death 0:07:35 Tomar's curse that turns him into a series of oblong rocks 0:07:51 Chris's intimidating bronze eyes 0:08:17 "Tomar, if you had the ability to shoot sludge out of your ass, would you do it?" 0:09:14 Tomar's bionic pee meter 0:10:39 Tomar's entitlement to self defense 0:10:44 Weak - hearted 0:12:29 Tomar's encounter with the green alien / D̸̺͖̱͗̊Ạ̴͓͜͝͠͝͝Å̴̧̡̧̜̀̅A̸͇̮̞̔̿̊Ầ̵̢̲̼̬͛̌A̵̞͑͋!̸̦̟͎͒̅̍ ̷̧̢͍͂͊ D̴̯̲̮̾͛̀̔A̷̡͐̿͊̍Ā̸̢͈̬Ḁ̷̡̡̟̇͝Ạ̷͕̺̌̄̚͜A̸͕͑!̷͎̤͆̂̅!̷̧͚̔̀ ̷̡̹̲̗̍̈́̉D̶̦̲̾͛̚͜͝ͅA̵̼̖̍̉Ą̸̙͙͛A̷̧̛̫͙̿̔͝ͅA̷̧̧̻͍̾̄͝A̷̦͂!̴̗͌̀ ̸̥̱̍̿͘͜ D̶̥̰̩̳̀̏̊͝A̴̦͇͒̾Á̶̦͔̔À̷̤͚̫̟̋Ả̷̲̣̔A̵̫̓̅̅͝!̴̲̳̱̈̃̍́!̸̱͌̄̎!̵̨͈̀ 0:13:49 "Chris: Mario vs. Goku vs. Squidward; who would win?" 0:13:57 Chris, Lyle, and the obvious patch of cum on the ground 0:14:14 Lyle sees Tweety Bird in the hospital 0:15:04 "Alright, Chris, you meet a lil monkey in the forest" "Yep" "It's got a nice, perfect cock" 0:16:08 "Lyle, if all a leech did was suck your cock really nicely, like better than a women, would you let it do it?" 0:16:33 Tomar's early stimulus check 0:17:46 Tomar: Wikipedia - like knowledge for a 3rd eye on your forehead 0:19:11 Chris: An eternal six pack of abs for eyes twice as large as normal 0:21:01 2% increase in IQ for 2 big bolts sticking out of your neck and a big scar on your forehead 0:22:56 How much money to have the phrase "TOMAR #1" engraved on your forehead 0:26:07 Tomar's big hands 0:27:01 "Chris, would you drink a cup of water from a lake that I found?" 1:14:58 Lyle goes to the pet store 1:17:53 Eyeball inside your penishole 1:18:12 "What's the worst thing Homer Simpson could say "ahhh-haaullghhh.....' to?" 1:18:50 The 7-Eleven Man 1:19:29 "Who do you think would win in a fist fight, like a- like a street brawl, Mario or Jeff Foxworthy?" 1:19:53 Chris opens his great uncle Mogilla's little sarcophagus 1:22:17 7-inch long brown capsule 1:22:55 The Nostalgia Critic eating a fistful of maggots 1:23:14 Majora's Mask esque human head in the sky 1:23:40 "Let's go on a Jell-O venture" 1:24:23 Die in the VR game, you lose a speck of brain matter 1:26:29 Lyle makes an "Over 9,000" video in 2018 1:27:46 Gobbo tits 1:29:47 Sasquatch red pill and blue pill 1:33:22 Your wife of 7 years is a Sasquatch 1:33:57 Your beautiful wife of 95 years is killed by skeleton archers 1:34:05 Tomar's jaw drops 1:34:59 "Tomar, if Jared Fogle came up to you" 1:35:31 Tomar, creator of Tomartopia dot com (link was snatched by a scam domain holder FYI) ill finish later like 5 years or more from now

Half of this is gonna be every plot point for the next smiling friends season

i like the snail hypothetical, imagine being a homeowner that always has at least one snail in your house at all times no matter how often you get rid of it, you'd think it was a curse but its just Chris trying to watch TV

watching this because of smiling friends i have to say zach’s humor really is just “how would a normal person genuinely react in a completely absurd situation” and i really enjoy it

In the suv self defense one, I like how tomar’s first idea of self defense tools are a harpoon or a cannon

Zach has to be one of the funniest people on the planet, I don't know how he comes up with half the shit that comes out his mouth

I love Tomar's almost angry confusion at Zach asking if he'd be entitled to self-defense if his head got crushed by an SUV

I have to have seen these clips at least fifteen times at this point, but I only noticed today that just as Zach says the word "one" at 42:30 the screen actually turns 1% more green for the rest of the clip.

1:48:53 never fails to make me laugh - Chris: "yeah you stupid asshole what would you do?" Zach: "no it gets better"

My favourite part about the Annoying Flying Saucer Alien Hypothetical is how Zach ridicules both Chris and Tomar for their entirely opposite reactions to the scenario

I'd love to take a glimpse inside Zach's mind... but I'm worried I wouldn't return.

Some of these hypotheticals melted my brain

zach: *creates an outlandish hypothetical* tomar: *offers an equally stupid scenario* zach: no, that’s ridiculous, but imagine this

I never noticed during the 1% more green hypothetical that the editor actually made the screen slightly more green.

Pretty sure Zach hasn’t spoken a single word on the channel that I haven’t heard 5 times over but I’m happy to soak it in again

"If you could gain 26 IQ points but you gain 4 inches on your head" Zach predicted Dr Vegapunk's look

I know this is a Zach video but the feeding a sentient fleshlight chilli bit is gold on lyle’s part

My favorite zach hypothetical is the one where he asked what would happen if he pitched a show to adult swim AND it got picked up.

I love how mad Chris gets at hypothetical warped little characters just denying stuff saying “Nuh uh”

Imaging having Zach as a Dungeon Master

i love how zach laughs every time he hears his hypothetical repeated back to him.

A little toddler running around the house and quickly and expertly unscrewing everything is such a funny visual

Inspired by Zach, I've literally begun to ask all of my friend's and close acquaintances similarly absurd hypotheticals, basically every second I'm around them, and what you find is: apparently, it's human nature to not want to answer absurd hypotheticals, especially if they're about whether you think you could defeat the ghost of Anne Frank in a game of hide-and-go-seek if a million dollars were on the line

My favorite flavor of Zach hypothetical is “would you allow this horrible life changing thing be done to you for little to nothing in return”

I've got to give Zach special credit for his ability to save a bit that's going nowhere, or was derailed by something. An example of the latter that I can think of is the roleplay they're doing where Zach is Chris' uncle, and he's got the little creature, and then Lyle comes in as Chris' mom shouting over everyone, and just seems to be getting on everyone's nerves (Chris even tells him in-character to lower his voice), but then Zach swoops in the with the "Your vision is one percent more green" to save the bit. I've noticed that a few times where Lyle starts being a little too Lyle, and they just cut him off while trying not to be rude about it.

Every Zach hypothetical: "What would you do if this crazy thing happened to you but every possible positive aspect of this situation you can find is invalidated?"

44:10 i love how outta all the shit Zack has said over the years, THIS is the thing that gets the most genuine sounding reaction of disgust outta Chris lol

1:57:07 "Can his mouth be 50% larger than a human mouth, so Zach can make a stupid hypothetical about him?" The sass behind that request 🤣🤣

15:56 - Tomar's "Wait what!?" was so genuine.

I did not know what "tree stars" were. I googled it and of course one of the first results was a photoshopped image of a longneck Tomar eating tree stars.

"Tomar what would you do if the Joker kidnapped Jaxy and dissolved her alive in acid and then ripped the eyes of all your friends in front of you?" "I-I dont know, I'd be pretty upset...!"

I love how every time zach asks "what would you do if (impossible scenario)" everyone's always like "idk I'd probably be pissed"

42:05 I'll never tire of the "little man noise" Zach does here.

I asked my little brother the one where his wife looks like a hammerhead shark and he said that he would sell her to an aquarium

There's a good chance that our reality is just one elaborate hypothetical Zach is currently thinking of.

I would believe Zach just pitched Smiling Friends as a hypothetical to the executives at Adult Swim, while Michael just sat back and watched in horror as he was dragged in

zach: what if a really close family member started acting cartoonishly uncharacteristic chris: i would respond reasonably zach: they tell you No and to Shut Up what do you do now

13:06 And thus, the best Smiling Friends joke was born.

44:25 I love how genuinely taken aback and offended Chris gets

My favorite hypotheticals are the ones where you literally can’t do anything and anything you do doesn’t matter. The Will Smith one is a perfect example

Zach: "Tomar what if you were looking for your lucky piece of cheese, you look behind a wall, and some guy is just watching porn on his computer" Tomar: "Like he's in the wall?" Zach: "Yeah like he's just sitting there all embarrassed because you walked in on him like a pervert"] Chris: "A big ol' perv" Tomar: "Well I would be more confused as to why this guy was living in my office wall" Zach: "Yeah but like you walked in on him" Chris: "It isn't any of your business Tomar why are you creeping up on people?" Tomar: "Well if its my office why is he in there?" Zach: "That's non of your business to know"

Seeing “Compiled by Otto Heckel” is the greatest seal of approval ever

the hypothetical about whether or not self-defense is Justified when somebody runs over your head... will always get me😂😂❤

1:30:00 i know it's unintentional but the way zach's bigfoot went "YOU CAN TALK?!" but didn't react to the response to the red pill or blue pill implies that this sasquatch's only knowledge about humans up to that point is that they are primal enough for him to expect them not to communicate, but they can still say "red pill" and "blue pill"

I feel like Zach only does this when he doesn't really care about the game they're playing.

24:30 I am convinced Zach made Smiling friends to earn money just so Tomar can actually do this

He always somehow words his hypotheticals in the most confusing ways possible

i love how zach just completely hijacked chris's hypothetical about the planet of the babes and turned it into his steampunk fantasy

42:06 how does mr zach make such sounds, it brings a big smile across my face.

I love when he starts a question off with "Tomar what would you do..." that's when you know it's gonna be great.

It’s like you guys read my mind and pulled out a little Zach figurine to talk to my ears for 2 hours thanks

13:07 this is literally one of the jokes from smiling friends

I feel like Zach has an unhealthy obsession with little gremlins and creatures

I love how everything “best of Zach” is pretty much just every time he speaks lol. The dude is just so funny

I have been binge watching Zach compilations for weeks I needed this more than Tomar needs some man juice

Some random guy just slapped Chris Brown on live TV after he made a G.I. Jane joke

Lyle having a 99 year old wife after 92 years of marriage is very concerning

this is just the _best_ of zach's hypotheticals. imagine the hours more of zach's kooky and goofy hypotheticals...

Ah yes Otto and Oney. A meeting of the minds.

I love that most of these are several clips from the same games in a row, since he just gets in a hypothetical mood sometimes

I still remember working at my job one day (I’m a hiring manager btw), and we were going through a sort of interviews, and we saw this young man come in with a big toothy smile and puppy dog eyes. He seemed very confident with himself, like he was going to get the job, but I couldn’t help but notice the…carving on his forehead. Seemed he thought it’d be a good idea to carve the phrase “Tomar Number 1” for all to see. He obviously didn’t get the job, but…I can’t get the image out of my head…it still comes to my mind, even years later…

The immense creativity of this man never ceases to amaze me lol

This man really just says stuff. Like, he puts all sorts of combinations of words together that I guarantee no other human being has ever said or will say. Who tf turns to their friend and asks what they'd do if they got turned into a series of oblong rocks? No one.

1:00:41 the hypothetical with Lyle constantly harassing Chris with calling him “young grasshopper” is so shit and unfunny but for some reason, the fact that Chris takes the hypothetical seriously, makes it pretty funny. Especially with how Zack and Lyle find Chris to be such a weenie that he would tattle on them to their manager lol i couldn’t remember where it was from but I’m glad it was included here. Love ya otto

Erm, *looks at the floor shyly*, the obnoxious alien going “Duh! Duh! Duh!” gets me every time.

2 hours of Zach hypotheticals? *strokes ginger beard and rubs belly with childlike glee*

It's crazy how he can come up with stuff like this. Editing aside in these playthroughs, he seems like he can plan all of this out without a problem, it's really entertaining tbh. Lol

I need a analog series where Zach is like a trickster spirit and his hypotheticals are deals he makes with people

While the great philosophers of the past questioned "What if we're not alone?" "What actually matters?" "What makes a human?" Zachrathes will be remembered by future generations for questions such as "What if you could get a piss meter installed into your belly?" "What if some alien landed in your backyard and threw his fingers at you like DOEGH! DOEGH! DOEGH!" "What if your boss called you to their office, questioned if you have fear in your life as their eyes and mouth are twice their size and they bit an apple then sent you back to work?"