One thing I love in romance is when the charcters continue to build upon their relations after they've got together, it is refreshing to see the break in the narrative of "love solves all. I really like when they still have issues within themselves and their relationship to work on together.
I agree so much with the earned sex scene thing. I feel bad blaming booktok for it because erotica has been around forever but I do feel like there’s been a rise in romance where physical/sexual attraction is focused on more than emotional attraction.
to me, erotica is its own thing. it delivers on promises, i'm all for that. i guess when i pick up a romance that's what i'm looking for. and sex is a part of that but it needs to yeah have that emotional attraction component
I think the problem is the advent of self-publishing / online-reader publishing-because it has enabled even people who don't always have the clearest grasps on the distinctions between Romance, Erotic Romance, and Erotica as genres to publish books even without fully understanding exactly how to classify which kinds of stories[ or how to classify stories containing which types of content exactly]...and is also enabling people to publish things without, strictly-speaking, adhering to the typical/established "rules" of a genre or what content stories of certain genre should & shouldn't contain. But maybe that's just my own guess, and could be wildly off, here. 😅Loll (Pros and cons to it, either way, tho!) Then again, there's also just been a rise in s*x-positivity in general, as well as the relaxation on s*x censorship and/or opposition to openly upheld 's*x sells' philosophies or whatever. So there has of course been an increase in support of women having s*x even just casually or without any emotional connection involved, so I suppose it's kinda natural that even in books the two may be becoming even more disconnected or at least not always inherently/innately connected or such, if that even makes any sense. Idekk🙃😁 🤷♀️ ((Or maybe it's just the inevitable byproduct of generations raised on shallow insta-love movies, where the "love" that characters experience could clearly only be an attraction to physical appearance, and an hour long movie or so not specifically focused on that romance barely has enough time to advance the non-romance plot and also build an actual proper interpersonal/emotional connection two people romantically-speaking..especially not when the female romantic interest usually did little more than just "wait at home" or be held captive by the villain or whatever and thus was separated too far from the male love-interest to actually build anything solid together for the majority of the runtime anyhow. I dunno, I have no idea- Loll 🤷♀️ 😂)) Either way, I agree that it does seem to be a difficult balance to find[ between the physical and the psychological &/or shared-life building aspects of romantic relationships in fiction], sometimes! ( Then again, in a way maybe that's just sort of reflective of people building relationships together in real-life sometimes[ and people not always being on the same exact page about what they want most from their relationships either physical or emotional or something], too?🤔 Who knows )
I love a good confession in a different language scene… googling it, if I don’t know the language, and finding out what cute shit the character just said just gets me every time 🥹
I lose my mind whenever the hero says “I’m gone for her” or “I’m so gone.” Like, sir…👀 I don’t know what makes me so giddy over that phrase, but I eat it up every single time.
I really love Aphrodite and the Duke. It has so many of these tropes. A man who is a rake, who is self loathing, childhood best friends, second chances, family dynamics, and the third act conflict is mostly external. Ugh so good. 😭😭 Chefs kiss.
Yes please! Heroes who don't like themselves! So underrated. Overcoming the insecurities and learning why they are deserving? Yes yes yes. Would watch the hell out of that video and read the hell out of that list.
I must say I also love the even more juicy ver of childhood friends to lovers is the childhood friends to enemies to awkwardly friends again to lovers . The tension and chemistry mixed with the yearning 😍. I love the I know almost all this person life good and bad and in the end we are just made for each other
Yes! Miscommunication is legitimately my favourite trope. It's really so delicious, whether it's in an angsty way or a funny way. I love when the characters are having a conversation but it's actually two different conversations because each of them has a different understanding/interpretation of the context. And misreading each other because of their own biases or assumptions pr insecurities? Soooooooooo good!
Ok I was trying to think of something really specific that I like and I’ve got it! I love in a historical romance when the characters first address each other by their given names or like a nickname. Because back then it wasn’t just about the name itself but if you were able to call them that, especially a Duke or Earl etc. it indicates a level of intimacy that they don’t have with everyone and I LIVE for it. Always Be My Duchess by Amalie Howard does this SO well
I don’t know what this says about me but I immediately thought of the Twilight fanfic “Wide Awake” when you said the “I can only sleep when its next to you”. I went wild for that trope back in my fanfic days😂
one super specific thing I love is when the main guy is a lovable rogue! like, he doesn't follow the law (maybe he's a thief, or a con man, or something similar), but still has his morals and still can be funny and charming! haven't found many examples of this in books, but it's my absolute favorite type of character!
Agree with so many of these! Mutual pining is the GOAT. I think instead of full marriage and babies epilogues, I like the "hero right before he proposes" epilogue, at least for contemporary romances. Also a sucker for a good care taking scene.
I agree on not using specific words in sex scenes. I’m not a big fan of “lewd” terms that can also be used as insults in day to day life, but I find overdone substitute terms cringe. I think I’d like just having sensations described, and letting me imagine the rest. My biggest issue with miscommunication is if the grounds for it doesn’t make sense for the characters. If it is related to the plot and doesn’t completely go against already established traits with no explained reasons, then I can be cool with it.
I knew you recs almost always worked for me for a reason 😅agree with all of these I also love some good forbidden love trope (because again, drama) and when the relationship have a healing effect on a hero or heroine. That's probably why I love tortured hero so much.
I feel the same way about the brothers best friend trope, like I have brothers and they didn't care at all about my love life. My husband's best friend married his sister and he was immensely happy for them.
Oooooh I love so many of these! One super specific one I have (for media in general, not just romance and not just books) is enemy spies/assassins who fall in love, especially if one or both the characters are first sent to kill the other. If it’s mixed with yet another of my super specific preferences (particularly the “character who was raised to be a weapon slowly realizes they’re human and have feelings too”), even better!!!
I love a good friends to lovers romance. I think it's my favorite trope. I also love a story that's actually funny and a good second chance romance. I love books where the hero falls first and ones where the hero tries his hardest not to like the heroine but he just can't help himself. There are times when I want angst and times when I just want easy. I don't mind insta-lust, because I do think it happens in real life. A bully romance is good as long as, like you said, it's not abusive.
Yeah, you're exactly right about Possessive-Jealousy! But if it's a more subtle jealousy, maybe even something that happens without the character fully realizing it, and not possessiveness so much as it's just them not realizing how much they want to spend more time with their love-interest or something or realizing they do but feeling as if they just aren't close enough yet that they have the right to be so much closer to their love-interest than anyone else but they really really want to be able to spend the time together to be able to get closer like that or something?? -Sometimes that's actually okay because, then it's kinda just a natural human flaw/imperfection, rather than actually coming from some kind of creepy self-entitled ownership or such!!!
So many of these I agree with (hence why I love your videos and usually have good luck with your recommendations) Especially with miscommunication! I feel like it gets a bad rep, but I just DO NOT want these bitches to talk to each other. Pine in silence! That's what makes it hurt so good. ALSO!! Romances where the hero doesn't like himself are my absolute catnip!!! I feel like I've seen this a lot in TV shows, but so rarely in books, but I WANT it.
this video and the entire romance community has made me realize how much I just want smut and don't care about connections or long term relationships xD
nawwww bcz i agree w everything, i think that's why i take your recommendations v seriously. also the earned smut is smn that i 100% can get behind. i found myself disliking smut because ive read SO MANY BOOKS that have smut scenes for absolutely no reason. like if i wanted to read pointless smut with absolutely no character development, plot or any sort of relationship development or emotional intimacy id just...read erotica😭😭 i feel like a lot of authors are writing their books nowadays with the sole intention of being on those tiktoks that have spicy book one liners that make people want to read them? you know what im saying? that also makes the smut feel inauthentic and pretentious as hell. like i want to swoon & want my heart to ache bcz of the angst & have a little party in my brain when the characters first get together because they deserve it. not repeatedly bedding each other for absolutely no reason 😭
okay but you have any other recs for funny rake heroes???. that is one of my favourites favourite type of heroes but its so hard to find. (will be ordering the governess game now )
I love 1nanny Romance Single parent romance Friends to lovers Second chance Good girl bad boy and probably the opposite as well I’d like some disability rep,especially Spina Bifida,epilepsy and hard of hearing and seeing issues
Things i hate: 1- Miscommunication 2 - Love triangule 3 - Romance with brother's best friend "forbibben cause the brother is gonna be sooo mad" CRINGE 4 - Insta-love I love enemies to lovers, but the characters have to REALLY hate each other. And then all the build up, the starting of a friendship it's just
One thing I didn't expect to love but have recently realized is characters who are kind of shitty people. I recently read Love, Hate, and Clickbait by Liz Bowery and there were a lot of reviews saying that they hated it because the characters were not likable, but I felt like they were so effectively unlikable that I found the trainwreck intensely enjoyable. I totally understand why a lot of people don't like that in romance, and I am certainly not always in the mood for it, but if it's done well, I'm a fan. I also agree with the earned sex scene thing! One rule I try to stick to when writing is that sex scenes should always further the plot (or the relationship development, which is the focus of the plot in most romances) in some way. Not a universal rule, but it helps me ensure that those scenes are part of the story, rather than just being stuck in at random, and thus feel "earned."
Sometimes a rake is so closed off and moody you’re like….. okay but how are you actually attracting women enough to be a rake? How is this cactus of a man drawing in enough women to qualify as a rake? The fun rake has charm, it makes a lot more sense that they’d be succeeding in seductions?
I feel like the brother being upset about a best-friend dating their sister comes from, like, the 1990s and earlier-back when it was normalized that the guys of the family had to "protect" the gals' of the family's "honor", and it was traditional for a guy to have to ask the other guys' "permission" to "court" the gal, or whatever.😅😅 (And, like, also kind of because besties are often like siblings to each other...so their actual siblings are somehow supposed to be like siblings to their besties too?? So..their besties are somehow supposed to want to protect or shelter or whatnot the besties' sisters too, rather than wanting to be the one who in fact "corrupts" or "sullies" the sister themself?) It is pretty dated, I guess. 🙃 😶
I think it depends on ages, how close the siblings are, personalities, etc. My siblings are all younger so it never happened to me but I did have friends this happened to!
I have a brother too and I used to crush on his friends all the time so you'd think I'd love this trope but I tend to agree, I'm not a fan. If I know a book has this trope it's usually an immediate no for me because they're almost always written completely unrealistically imo. There's only one book I can think of where I didn't hate this trope, it was Beautiful Player by Christina Lauren and the only reason I didn't hate it is because the brother didn't even live in the same city as the main characters. The heroine moved to another city where her brothers bff lived and moved in with him while she found her feet. The brother was more of an background factor than a main part of the story so it was way less cringe and annoying and a bit more mature than most books with this trope imo.
