Kati, I started to feel like cutting myself. The urge was very strong, like I started to plan out what and how I was going to do it! I got on my phone and started to watch your videos. They actually distracted me for a half an hour and my urge died down pretty much! Thanks Kati!!!!! I did it! I made it through the urge to cut!!!!!!!!!!
I was in session with my current therapist one day and said something along the lines of "you know, I used to read about black and white thinking and I never thought I did that but now I really think I do" and the surprise on her face with priceless. It was that look of "you really just figured this out?" It was hilarious and still gives both of us a good laugh to this day. I really had no idea I struggle with that mentality and was also pleased to find she understands me so well.
Yeah, I'm a very black/white, all/nothing thinker. But overcoming that is one of my recovery goals. I just want to say, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for all that you do. You are helping so many people.
Since I learned about mindfulness, and practicing awareness like whats discussed in this video, I've been able to cut the time of some ocd behaviors in half
Thank you Soooo much. Kati i have been going through this for a few weeks, i fell apart in my ED recovery. My family tends to be a trigger and i'm going home for winter break after being in college. It's also when i'm stressed and i have finals next week. I also wish people would understand the whole "not quitting cold turkey" You made this video during the perfect timing for me because i was on the verge of giving up on recovery. Thank you.
omg... i do this all the time. even the example fits. my friend said she couldn't just didn't want to come over and i was like 'ok so she hates me, im too boring for her, im just depressive and a downer for everyone, why am i still alive...' aaaah help :3
This is so me. A friend cancells our plans and my world is fallen apart. I cry and break down don't want to have any social contacts anymore pushing everyone away
This REALLY helps, Kati. I think like this all the time! And you're right, I don't even think about it! Your videos are so positive. Thanks for giving me some hope!
I am such an all-or-nothing, catastrophizing thinker, but those thoughts have always been limited to only me. (I'm also one extreme or the opposite extreme with my actions. "Can't be the best? Then I must be the worst," etc.) I'm glad to have seen this video. I've never been one to think, "Only I feel like this," "Only I do this," or "Only I have this kind of problem," but it's still nice to be reminded by someone other than myself, especially when it comes to this type of thinking. Thank you!
Thanks Kati! I just found your channel yesterday and I'm in love with your videos! I totally do everything you talked about in this video. My perfectionism and distorted thinking have done numbers to my mental health over the years. I am recovering from self harm and want you to know how much of a difference you are making in my life even though it has been less than 24 hours. Thank you again.
Thanks for this Kati! I definitely think black and white. I get so angry with myself for even having the thought to binge/purge, restrict, or self harm. I need to celebrate the victories, no matter how small and look for the good in every situation. Thanks again!
I love watching these videos because you somehow always understand me better than I do myself! I actually think your videos helped me recover from SH-ing
Haha, you're so funny :) I laughed several times watching this! I realized while watching this that I actually do a lot of black and white thinking. Never really thought about it in that way before.. I just thought I had like strange mood swings, if you know what i mean? So thank you so much for this video! I will definitely watch it again whenever i feel like I need it.
THIS IS AWESOME. I'm going to try and have something with me at all times to write out or draw my frustrations. I'll keep you updated! I'm going to use your channel as my accountability.
I discover that i feel really really better with cleaning and the scond thing is declutter. I love to destroy things out, i dont just throw a book in trash i like to make it torn completely.
Oh my god you described me I think like that alot I dont have an eating disorder or self harm but I do get depressed and think like that when someone cancels on me they're not busy they just don't to be around me im better now thanks to therapy but still have to fight those thoughts nice to know others feel this too that im not the only one thanks Kati
This video should seriously be shown to all high schoolers & college students. . . Black & white thinking can become a serious misunderstnading to people who have a lack of empathy, but plenty of sympathy.
Kati, I absolutely love this video. I have been a complete perfectionist which started in my late teens and just seems to get worse as the years go by. Before watching this video, I didn't realise that it's my black and white thinking is that is really damaging me. I am all or nothing with EVERYTHING I do. I hope to be able to put this video into practise. Now for a question... I have been intentional self harm free for many years. I say "intentional self harm" as there have been one or two occasions in the last year where I have lashed out (like hitting my arms down on my desk or punching a wall) which has resulted in bruising/small injury - this wasn't done to intentionally to hurt myself, it's more of an "in the moment" lash out of frustration/upset. Anyway, I haven't intentionally self harmed for a long time. I think my black and white thinking is intensifying each year. This way of thinking makes me really hard on myself when I shouldn't (I know I shouldn't and even when I notice, I can't help it). Over the last year my self harm urges have been getting worse. The last 6 months have been especially difficult and this last week or so I have found myself close to giving in most days. Distraction has always worked really well for me so I've tried to find more distractions that are easy do immediately (new puzzle and word games on my phone being the most useful, currently). I feel like the moment I go back to self harming, I'm going to be back where I was a long time ago. I have booked in with my Doctor but the next available appointment was in 1 month, so I'm waiting (NHS, England). I have found through my workplace that I have access to counselling, so I have applied and am waiting for a phone call next week. I looked into therapy and emailed one particular lady who stood out to me, but I just can't afford it - I struggle enough with the basic bills each month. Do you have any other suggestions on what I can do to get through this particularly hard time? Nothing in particular has happened to make my depression worse. In fact, my life is pretty good and together on paper. I just need to keep myself heading in the right direction, but I'm feeling tired of fighting my thoughts all the time. A small part inside of me wants to give in now because I don't know what else to do to get some relief. Many thanks for all your videos as always, Jordan x
I realize that I tend to give into my SH desires when life is stressful, but not taking up too much of my time and my ANA desires when life is stressful and I my duties are taking up too much of my time. Watching RU-vid videos is one of my delay tactics.
You said "not in your recovery journal" can you categorize journals we should make??? I have started one and I've just shoved it all together. CRAP. LOL. I feel I must organize now!
this is totally my life. something kinda sucky happened over Christmas and I was just like.. well now I might as well just quit life cos I can't do anything right and everyone hates me... I guess more recently I've kind of worked out what makes me think like that though..
Something was thinking about with self harm, cutting in particular, is most people who do it, want to see the healing process. And since we can't see our emotional pain/healing, we externalize it and we see the scar heal... And that seems to be the hope we depend on.
:) I've been waiting for this video (it's 9.30pm uk time) Another video where I've sat and thought you must know my life story !! Thanks for sharing these videos and reminding me I'm not the only one who thinks like this -3 I think this type of thinking is why I'm sooo organised !! Oh and the last 10 seconds of this made me belly laugh !!!!!!! :):) haha xxx Kath xxx
I wish my therapist was like this. She wants me to stop and never do it again but for me it’s not that easy. And then I feel the need to hide it so she doesn’t tell my parents. I’m currently trying to figure out if I should hide it from her when we meet Monday.
Can I talk to you one and one? I do not trust any therapist and I am struggling . I am Bipolar 2. It's hard for me to reach out to anyone, but I feel like I can trust you.
I realize I cut more when I'm isolating myself and distance myself from friends.. Or when I see my friends have boyfriends and enjoying life.... while I'm stuck in this eating disorder/depression mode... so I isolate myself more... See the problem? :(
I think I like working out, maybe Im coping and I didnt know. It is really common to me to feel angry frustrated and sad from nothing. Can it be possible that anything can trigger those feelings?
Is there any way we can post a question or ask for help with an issue that ISN'T twitter? I don't have twitter and don't even know how to navigate the social media site but I have some conflicting thoughts about these suggestions (they aren't really working for me) and I was wondering if there was a way I could send a message to Kati to see if she has any suggestions with regards to my struggles, I really don't feel comfortable posting them here for all the world to see. :(
@katimorton i have noticed that when i cut i feel horrible with myself afterwards and say i wont do it again then a day 2 or 3 later i cut again and its a cycle.....why is this?
! I have a confession when I seem my councilor we spoke about the feeling that I've lost my mums love. I told her on my mums phone there's texts to my sister saying " I love you much" every day. I don't get that. My councilor said" you went through your mums phone"? I felt like a bad daughter I have done the same in the past when I found out and ex was cheating on me. Is that really terrible? Sorry
Aww are you the speech police? That word takes on different meanings when used in certain ways. Why don't you get it out of your vocabulary and stop trying to control others. You'd be a much happier person if you tended to your own vocabulary back yard and left others alone.
What brought me to video's like this was a girl 2 years ago that was crazy obsessed in love with me, or so I thought, suddenly switched her "obsessive love" to another guy and she at one time told me that with her it was either "all or nothing" so that kinda tipped me off about her personality type which I believe she was a Border line and she cut contact with me totally, unfriended me on Facebook and I still loved and cared for her but it didn't matter, she cut me off .
