Borderline Personality Disorder: 10 Self Care Tips to Help You Cope with BPD 

I just don’t know who I am. I’m this happy person but then there’s me who is almost always there and I feel so much hatred and just ego and everything doesn’t feel real and I can’t take it. I just. I can’t.

1. behavioral activation: choose constructive, engaging activities that may influence a more constructive, positive outlook 2. ask yourself if your habits are destructive... reduce or eliminate unhealthy habits. 3. reach out to talk about your experience 4. relaxing techniques such as mindfulness, mindfully walking, deep breathing 5. avoid triggers 6. be patient, accept your tendencies, don't judge yourself 7. help some one else 8. keep a mood diary (help with emotional awareness) 9. physical health (diet, exercise, sleep) mind and body are connected! apt for outdoor activities 10. talk therapy

I just caused my fiancé to end things with me over a text because of these rude horrible things I said and yet I feel like I had no control over myself. It’s like I genuinely thought we were over and I had this incredible incredible pain and so I pushed her away and caused our destruction. Im finally accepting that I have this. It’s horrifying.

I recently came to know about the symptoms of BPD and identified all of those symptoms were in me. However unknowingly I somehow overcame that by undergoing a specific process: However, I would suggest the below whoever is here for self help: 1) Do not worry if you have been diagnosed with BPD. You will be fine as I am today. 2) Identify exactly what triggers you to become vulnerable and when these BPD symptoms start to appear. avoid those trigger points and never ever show or disclose your trigger points to your partners, sometimes they can take upper hand. Better identify triggers and try to solve it by setting goals. 3) Engage yourself in any physical activity like gym, morning walk, dance , where the emotions will be channelled in a proper way. 4)Try to meditate, or even listen to calming videos available on the internet. 5) Spend more time in nature. Believe me or not none can heal you the way nature can. And nature will never betray you anyway. 6) Keep yourself away from phone atleast few hours everyday. Try to normalise not going to phone to check notification now and then. 7) Remember that at the end of the day its you who can help yourself the most. Love yourself the way none can. Believe in yourself more than anyone else. You are the best friend and will always remain your best friend.

I wish I could afford a private Psychologist!... I also wish I could jet off to some sunny place to recover....FLIP THE COIN....NHS for me and a cheap coach ticket to Cornwall, solo camping for 6 weeks...highly recommend the latter! Oh ! and the internet with people like Dr Martina sharing her knowledge...thanks for that....

Tip number 3 is terrible for us because we wear out our we're out our support network and then people will draw back from us thus making us feel abandoned which is our largest fear

I had a really bad mental breakdown today enough for my parents to try and send me to the hospital. I tried to communicate how I was feeling mutilple times calmy and clearly. I increasingly got more upset and eventually I was told I was overreacting. I told my father to stop because I was becoming overwhelmed. He basically said I couldn't handle the truth while practically yelling at me. I left and went psycho. It got worse once they said they were taking me away. I begged them to stop and no one would look at me or listen to me. I felt so helpless.. I just don't know what to do. I'm terrified of getting therapy and not being understood. I don't know why I'm sharing this but I don't think it's ever been this bad before. I'm desperate to be understood..

I already feel better after listening to you ❤

I just lost the best thing that ever happened to me bc I don't know how to live with bpd. I tortured my fiancee with accusations and paranoia. I never knew I was like this until recently. I listen to teaching on line. But when it comes to put it into practice when needed I am unable to do it. Then I hate myself for hurting him and wish I could torture myself instead bc it's all my fault. It's like watching my horror movie of a life not being able to do anything about it.

Thank you for taking the time to make this ❤️

Not sure if it's genetic for me. I had a very traumatic childhood. I had to cut my dad down when he took his life. That and other stuff really took its toll on my mind

I have been struggling a lot for a few days to get out of this situation. Thank you ❤️

Was just diagnosed. I have appointments set up to start the coping process but it's good to see professionals offering their knowledge so I can fill in the gaps between appointments

Thank you, this video was very helpful for me. 🙏🏼❤️

Thank You So Much Dr Martina For Sharing this Video regarding BPD Sufferers, I Have BPD & I Really Need Support but I, m Not getting what I Need atm, but I, m Going to Help Myself & get the Help I Need Thank You.

This was really helpful thank you

BPD is "A disaster a day." Paradoxical, ("I hate you, I love you." "Go away. Don't go away.") You're coping skills are way too temporary. And frustrating. Have you truly dealt with bpd personally? Doesn't sound like it.

When try to make new friends i start talking real fast and tell them everthing about me. Most freak out and run away. Now days i do it beacuse running people off seems fun now.

Thanks for the tips ☺️

Thank you for all these tips

Thank you so much I will try and use these tips and see how it gose

This video was so helpful!Thank u💙I think ill try the one where u try doing at least one good/happy activity a dy.I subscribed!I hope u keep making more coping skill related ones! 🙂

Thank you so much for this

Thank you this was useful ❤️

Thank you Doc💪🏾

Thank you so much for this helpful video

Hello Dr. Martina, I myself suffer with BPD and I've been in therapy for more than 1 and a half years. A thing I often struggle with is feeling negative feelings towards my boyfriend. I can be very afraid of intimacy, but also can feel dependent. I think I tend to be afraid of abandonment and then bad episodes happen, where my brain keeps screaming at me to leave the relationship and completely numbs me to his love. I'm not sure if these things are normal to happen and can be fixed, or if it means something else. It's very confusing and painful.

Thank you I recently discovered this is something that I’ve been battling for a very long time some of the healthier coping skills I’ve done range from working nonstop in the public ,improvisation, activities acting ,jogging,extreme couponing, and now writing poetry. Also making short films and volunteering .I can overdo things, and I’m starting to pull back in and not put so much into my work ethic and volunteering for other people, but trying to work toward my future goal and recently enrolled back in school, full-time to get my degree. Quit the show I was volunteering on for no pay and have been going to therapy for about two almost 2 years now on a weekly basis, and I find when depression comes into my mind. My therapist help me make a choice to only commit to two things because I was working myself to the point of exhaustion Doing good causes. I hope this can help at least even one person I was subjected to various types of abuse as a young child and abandon at different points by my mom coming of age and then my dad as a young child, and both introvert entered back into my life, but I figured I had different events and episodes of BPD when my mom died in 2021 and I’ve been struggling with it and continue therapy. It’s a relief to finally know what I have been dealing with.

Thank you so much

my psychiatrist diagnosed me with generalized anxiety first. then bipolar. then she said that more and more symptoms are appearing after my antidepressants took effect (i got them for the GAD). like depersonalisation, derealization, and even some psychotic symptoms, like hearing voices, etc. they were likely there before too, but i just can't remember. so she told me that she thinks it's most likely that i also have bpd. and im glad to finally have a name for it all, but it doesn't take away from the fact that its so scary, and i cant really see a future for myself where i don't leave early, but i will keep trying

Thank you so much. This video is the best & most informative video I've encountered in my search. Everyone else recommends drugs. Others title their video how to treat bpd but then dont mention a word about treatment only advertising their books or websites. (which Im sure those are helpful if one has money)

My sister told me no one in my family likes me. It almost killed me. I knew she was projecting her own hate on to me but those words nearly killed me!

Thank you!

Thank you.

I struggle massively on a daily basis and i don't know how long i can keep fighting

imagine having a support network

1.behavioural activation. Release the emotional turmoil thro activities that are pleasurable and healthy like going for a walk, doing yoga, dancing etc. 2.avoid unhealthy coping mechanism like binge drinking, Eating, self harming behaviour. 3.talk to people. 4.learn relaxing techniques and mindfulness.

I just realized after over a dozen online quiz's I have it and I realize now I dont want to be a jerk and be distant then the center of attention I just want help

What support network lol everyone is tired of dealing with me

Avoid unhealthy coping mechanism- if I was able to consistently do this- especially in the moment- , I wouldn’t have the diagnosis . It’s like telling a heroine addict- just stop taking the drug. SMH

I'm having a really hard time concentrating because of her accent. British, Latin, American, Canadian, Borat?? I'm losing it and I'd really like to learn from this video. My psychiatrist has diagnosed me recently and this has made me aware of a whole set of behaviors/ thoughts/ coping skills that I just attributed to myself being an absolute nightmare of a human. At 38 it's good to know this is identifiable and manageable!

Appreciate 💐

Well been a month like this … I feel like giving up I have bpd from 1 year now But last month is wired Im trying everything but nothing excite me anymore

What if the trigger is people?? Like meeting individuals or interacting?

I hate living this way, my long distance boyfriend works all the time, and i try to be very understanding but he works so much he barley has time to sleep or time for me, we havent called in so long, i want to communicate my pains to him so he knows how i feel but when i try he says" you know i cant call or text while im at work" and im like what about after, he said hed call, never did, i waited till 2-3 am for the call, it never came, he barley texts me, i feel like i should break it off because part of me thinks hes not making time for me, but part of me is trying to understand that it might he part of my personality because it's technically a long distance relationship we live an hour and 30 mins away by streets but 45 mins freeway, ive asked him if i can come down and see him but its always "maybe" ive been hurt so much before im scared of abandoment but i just want to make thing work with him, i cry in silence because i dont wanna spam him with how i feel im trying to wait till i can see him in person, but hes not made effort to see me yet. Hes always working im glad he makes good money, but he might be a work aholic i get about 4 texts a day, no calls as of recently, and 1 snap, nothing else, i just wanna spend time with him, my love language is quality time his is acts of service, its hard i cant see him so i can serve him, and im living in my friends living room cuz both my parents are abusive and my brother picked up on it and is abusive too, he broke my door trying to hit me when he chased me around the house, i have a part time job cuz only managers get full time, but i font have the finances to help him i can barleys afford my own bills, i have no idea how this is supposed to work , i had a shit down yesterday where i just cried all day face first in the bed because i cant see him and im really trying and im hurt and have no way to tell him, hes too busy

I’m on a waiting list for treatment thanks for this

I don't know if I should say "I used to" harm myself but I feel like I have changed a bit I've learned to put on a mask... to fool the people close I feel like I'm way far from being saved... I can hurt myself anytime.

How can you tell others you have bpd when there is a lot of stigma attached. I have 3 different jobs. One balance the other. I don't really look to professionals for help. I don't find they help.

ty

My therapist told all of these to do but why can't I get rid of it,,, I don't know,,, it's hard

What do I do if I don't have a network. I shut out ones who stress me out. That in a regular person would be the network.

My partner has BPD I need to help her to help every one,its really difficult.

This lady has an unusual voice

When I was six years old my stepmother left me in a doorway with a note saying not wanted

No support network.

Dont tell people you have BPD especially medical professionals as they will run a mile

Smoking weed seems to be my go too

I was diagnosed back in 2018, the whole Amber Heard trial has made me panic and augment my care of my behaviors.

Why is my comments being removed??

take a walk, dance, or take a walk in nature. the answer to BPD episodes! smh.

I reach out to my only support network "Jack Daniels" or when Jack is not available "Johnny Walker". They are the only friends I have and they always help soothe me. Pschobabel bullshit does nothing to help

Am I the only one whos hearing a British accent come out? it kept throwing me for a loop all video 🤣

Funny how a preacher might say, "you need a better relationship with God," a politician could say, "vote for me, life will be better," and a therapist, will always say, "you need therapy," and on and on. Didn't Socrates say, "know thyself," and "heal thyself"?

I hate myself

Watch this at 2x speed... it's like she doesn't realize who she's making this video for.

I am tired from someone have this

Such a bad video!

Like I wanna change and get better but I've lacked support all my life including professional (yes I've spent 10 years seeking it so don't even go there) to a point where I have no motivation to do anything. I can't be fucked anymore. I got no energy to fight. I'm so suicidal it's not even funny in fact I been thinking of just going off grid completely and ending it. I'm too stubborn, pessimistic and impatient now.