"No one is ever the same from one day to the next. Experiences like this... they change us... so what changed in you?"
When I first sat down to make this video, I was planning on really focusing in on “the wheel” of it all and displaying how Buck continues to fall into the same patterns in his relationships - and THEN - I actually started making it.
I still think I'll do a video like that at some point (because I pulled all the necessary clips for it...), but as I started to actually create this, it became much less about how Buck's relationship with Tommy might be shaking up his patterns of behavior, and more about Buck's constant quest to figure out who he is, where he fits into the world, and THEN how Tommy fits into all of that.
Buck's entire character arc across the show has been about a search for identity. He starts out as the "kid" of the group- immature, impulsive, and incapable of finding stillness. As the show progressed, he learned more about himself, the world, and how he fit into it - particularly during his arc in season six.
This is still very much a Buck and Tommy video, but I wanted to use the first half of it to paint a picture of some of the recent changes that NEEDED to occur in Buck's life to get himself to a place where he can finally have this big piece slot into place. Buck's discovery of his own sexuality in his 30s isn't just a chance occurrence that happened due to the arrival of Tommy into his life, it's something that Buck EARNED through years of trying to find peace in who he is.
While I can't suggest that everyone in search of answers goes out and tries to get struck by lightning, I think in Buck's case, that event was the literal "shock" that he needed to stop searching for this next version of himself (Buck 2.0, Buck 3.0, etc...) and instead just live AS himself.
(Though I do admit - I would definitely find it funny if Buck decided to refer to his new self-realized bisexual self as "Buck 4.0," because that just feels very... Buck.)
This style is a little different than I normally do - more long monologues, less quick audio cuts - but I like how it all turned out and I hope you do to.
And hey - if you do, feel free to like the video and/or leave a comment!
- Winnie
9 май 2024
