Cafe Polski -- subtitles for the English-speaking 

I LOVE THIS SKETCH ! I WORK WITH 3 Polish people who think this is really grade a gold! pity there are no longer comedy like this. on another level I met Harry Enfield years ago, through my work in a Hospice. he came to vist, Harry was /is such a lovely man please do some more work like this!" thank you for being such a nice man .

The most shocking thing about this is that a cappuccino used to be £1.60!

I’m Canadian but my background is Polish and I grew up in a Polish neighbourhood in Toronto. What a perfect portrayal of Polish people. The frostiness, the frankness, the contempt - they nailed it all haha!

'There is a Polish film about Stalinist atrocities in my country. It's supposed to be quite funny' 🤣🤣🤣

There are English men all over the country having this exact experience daily

I think what’s brilliant is the sadness, he’s probably divorced and thinking he was young and there’s just so much to unpack.

I have had the same situation with a polish girl at work,she gives you all the signs that she's interested in you and when you give it back its like aaaaaahhh go away!!!

I love the tortured 360 she does when looking for the newspaper. But that doesn't even begin to compare to the 360 she does at the end when she goes from standoffish to extremely interested. Poor guy doesn't seem to know what a nutter he's hooking up with.

I can't begin to analyse why this sketch is so brilliant - it just IS. Harry brings subtle new dimensions to humour that, sadly, I think go over a lot of peoples' heads.

This is how I felt on my 40's working around young ladies in their 20's. They used to giggle and call me grandad! I told them about the first car I drove and one of them said Was it a model T Ford? I laughed whilst dying inside!

After seeing both these clips then other Harry & Paul clips, nothing but nothing compares to Cafe Polski, so multi layered, hilarious, I love it.

“This is my younger sister Anka...you must be careful because she likes the older men !” "What ?" Enfield’s face !!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I thought I was the only one affected by Polish women in shops like this. They're so fascinating and exotic to me, but they just smile and take my money.

"I missed you..." "WHAT!?"

I just walked into a coffee shop and ordered something from the pretty central european girl behind the counter. She actually said: "Hello, how are you today ?" I think I felt my heart fall fifty feet.....

£1.60 for a Cappuccino! £1.60!! What an age to be alive....

Yes funny on so many levels, good for Harry Enfield and older English man, shy with girls, getting so excited at the start. So funny. At least we can laugh at ourselves in the UK.

This and 'Saw You Coming' are why Harry is a genius

Everything that follows from 8:30 is simply psychology gold. Beautifully observed. The older man would die for a date with the blond girl. He finally gets his wish but the realistic prospect of getting it on with an even more attractive female spoils it for him. In an instant the object of his desire turns into an obstacle to winning over the more desirable girl. So true.

Hi there. I'm Polish. Been living in the UK for about 16 years now. I absolutely love The Flying Circus of Monty Python and their sense of humour which I guess is the very quintessence of the English humour. Very often return to those sketches of theirs, time-permitting... They were without a doubt the best comedians in the whole history of the world. The Greatest. When I was younger, we used to watch Benny Hill on the Polish TV as well. Loved it. At that time, as a child, I couldn't understand English, of course, but such things (and songs) did prompt me to learn it on my own, even without a teacher---a book was all I needed (which incidentally means that if you really want something, you're going to get it). Now that I do I enjoy THIS type of humour so much more. And please remember, Polish is difficult . Very difficult. In fact, one of the 3 most difficult languages to learn in the whole wide world. So, if you think you're a titan and can achieve the Impossible, you can challenge yourself and try to learn it :) But yes, I actually know 2 native English people that do speak very good Polish. They have studied at Polish universities and got their degrees, one of them in history and the other one in maths.

Harry is one of my best friends. I've known him for many years. He is a good bloke, funny guy. Loves to have a bit of banter

i didn't realise it was the highly talented laura solon (in the flesh so to speak) in this sketch being only familiar with her radio show. She is sooooo funny !! together with harry enfield they've created something which is subtlety hilarious

"it is a polish film. about the Stalinist atrocities in my country. It is supposed to be quite funny!" I f'ing died and then wondered how many Poles from this period are still alive today.

My wife is polish and pissed herself at this🤣

This is unironically every group of Polish women in any British workplace ever.

This is good observational comedy. I'm Polish living in the UK and I love English humour, sadly it's being systematically eroded by PC...

Thank you so much for this - the subtitles are great and show how much care the writers spent on these sketches, when they could so easily have put in Polish-sounding nonsense. It does indeed capture the cultural and gender differences perfectly - so funny!

Harry is truly a genius, all I love of authentic English humor

that cappuccino went from £1.60 to £1.90, the horror

Harry Enfield is one of the greatest character actors of the last 20 years and that cannot be understated.

Genius!! I've watched this multiple times and laughed each time!

These are so well written and performed. Reminds me of a small Polish food store and cafe in Eastbourne.

Considering how hard Polish is, I'm quite impressed that the actresses could say anything at all :) Though a lot of it sounded like gibberish to me.

I'm Polish Brit....this is absolutely in point ..ha ha ha culture,understanding, characters ..of both sides British and Polish ha ha ha

Love the Eurodance version of _Love is All Around!_

this is very subtle, well observed mundane mannerisms. great comedy

Love the fact you supplied translations in the subtitles, nice job!

Laura Solon is fucking brilliant in this one: "ONE NINETY PLEASE!"

Brilliant sketch, love it.

As a pole I must say they nailed the girls' looks and behaviour, blonde's haircut and makeup are spot-on. :)

Ironically, the assistant, Morwenna Banks, was at least 46 when this was recorded. Very old.

Subtitles for the English-speaking? You might want to add subs for Poles also, because half of the time they talk gibrish, not anything close to Polish.

Love a bit of Laura Solon - so great in these sketches

Thank you for taking the time to do this , have always wondered what was said Nice one , only adds to the humour 😀

The bit about the non-recognition of the customer... this is classic eastern European stuff. I live in Latvia and you finally think you've built some rapport with shop workers and can expect a smile instead of the usual icy frown only to find the next day it's as if they never saw you before. The whole service staff across eastern Europe act like they're autistic or something.

I had a Polish client who used to come in to the office with her female interpreter. Both always expensively dressed and perfect make-up. It was a bit like this.

The sharp and abrupt "WHAT" is perfect.

I'm sure I've been served by these two!

Feels like very good tragic comedy this. Enfield is such great comedian and always perceptive in characters.

His ability to spot humour in many social groups is unerringly accurate,what next Turkish barbers chatting amongst themselves...

They don't make 'em like this anymore. They aren't allowed - but we have the legacy here 😊

Every Polish cafe ever. :D

Marvellous. Bring back Harry Enfield.

Omg I loved this show when it came on TV! Surprised its not been aired on Netflix etc what a classic and hilarious too 🤣

This is great. Beyond comedy!

ah, I remember when a coffee was £1.60. Seems like an age ago...

Very funny. And strangely true to life in a way!

Would love to see more of Morwenna now - very funny lady!

Thanks for the translation, really appreciated.

How do people not get this.. it doesn’t matter if it’s fluent Polish or the right accent, it’s aimed at us Brits!

Wow, the redhead is actually Morwenna Banks? Haha, loved her in Saxondale, always teasing poor Tommy. BTW I'm a Pole.

Whilst in Krakow I went into a grocery shop to buy vodka to bring home, I notice a shoulder of lamb with a card on it saying 'Zebra' I asked the girl behind the counter was it really zebra to which she replied, 'If you don't speak Polish then I don't speak English'. So I left. I love the Polish sense of humour.

Perfect sketch. The extra squirt of cappuccino is brilliant!

Harry and Paul are brilliant

Getting older myself, 51 years young now, I notice the age gap with ladies in their 20's and even 30's. Aging is truly inevitable. The beautiful women coming out of most Eastern European countries, truly spellbinding. I had befriended and also dated very many attractive young Eastern Euro ladies in past times.

This is a brilliant sketch,ive watched and loved so many harry Enfield characters but this is fantastic,this sketch is up there with Les the barman.

Different actresses from 1st sketch. Morwenna Banks was in the first ones, she is a great actress.

Alice Lowe nailed the polish language in there, I could actually understand her haha

Damn. I'm 48 :( Polish girls are very much like this. They turn from day to day

It's fun to see what they're saying but I think I preferred not knowing... it adds to the awkwardness. Great sketch :)

I am sat in a coffee shop in Krakow and I ordered a duży cappuccino and I had a personal fangirl moment.

XDDDDDDD This is exactly the type of dynamic that exists between me and the waitresses when I go anywhere!! Ooooh shit... 😆😅

Laura Solon compleatly nails this part ! The first time I saw it I compleatly believed she was Polish. I should know I live in London or little Poland as its now known

I feel rather sorry for so many of the people in the comment section who A. don't understand that this is aimed at the English speaking audience and B. clearly don't understand the English sense of humor. No, the accent isn't supposed to be bang on point. That is the whole point of comedy. You're supposed to laugh at the terrible attempt as the foreign accent, and not analyse it like some speech / accent expert. No, this is not an attack on any nationality. It is just humor. If you somehow can't grasp the comic value, then that's sad. But don't waste your time over analyzing.

Brilliant in every aspect

Great comedy, still getting laughs (and comments), years along!

He nailed not only those Polki but especially the typically gulable bloke. As long as it only cost him the Duze Cappucino's, flowers and a cinema ticket I guess it's still quite funny. Behind all the humour there's as always deeper more scinister side to the sketch.

I'm half Polish. I went to krakow for a week. We went to the same place for a week, to get coffee. There was a reasonably surly waitress there. However by the end of the week, when we said we were leaving, hugged us and cried.

Brilliant! A very slight Kevin-esque "uh" near the end.

It's funny...In the UK and Ireland almost every cafe is staffed and being run by Polish ladies. I know a woman that worked fulltime in a pub/nightclub and she buiöld 2 houses in Poland! One for her and her baby and one for her mother. All by waiting tables in Europe.

Well, sitting in Krakow 4 months in the country, re-wathcing this, drinking wine I am cracking my ass off

I think this might be based on a coffee shop in Islington, North London where the Polish girls who worked there were charming when they spoke English then would say really horrible things about the customers to each other in Polish (or so my Polish work colleagues told me!)

Observational humour, never seen anymore, PC killed it. So glad Harry Enfield and Paul Whitehouse had so many great sketches before this new crap world began.

I'm guessing a lot (but not all .. big Suze!) of you may not have recognised the younger sister at the end? She's Sophie Winkleman. If you watched the huge comedy Two and a Half Men she went from the UK to the US and starred as Zoey, Waldens English love interest. And lovely she is :) She married a Lord in real life and has some title as Lady something or other :) BIG SUZE!! (She also played Suze in a show called Peep Show).

IT WILL RAIN AT LUNCHTIME! 😄

1.27 that nod to the left and 'good morning' is brilliant. I work a lot with eastern european women and this is exactly what they do.

Ah the good old days of 1.60 for a large coffee

The laughing and whispering! Reminded me of high school!

Could have been any of my Polish ESOL students.... especially the younger ones 😄

Thankyou for translating. It's even funnier with the subs.

The tension here is unbearable.

One day these sketches will be shown in school history classes with the laugh track removed and presented as primary sources: Britain in the Early 21st Century.

I don't know whether this will get deleted (it probably will be seen as offensive to some people even though that isn't my aim). But Polish girls are often very beautiful. I love the way they speak English too in the accent. I could listen to these ladies all day with an accent like that. I feel cheated as I've just found out the beautiful blonde lady is actually English and is called Laura Solon. 🤣

Thanks so much for the subtitles!

Harry and Paul are so underrated... This stuff is ten times funnier than anything the likes of Morecambe and Wise, The Two Ronnie's etc. did...

Excellent! Really cracked me up. Thanx.

I'm telling my Polish neighbours of this. It's really funny. Been watching it a lot.

The impressive bit about this sketch is the £1.60 price of a capuccino

I think I’d die of a caffeine overdose if Sophia Winkleman worked at my local coffee shop

My guess - not complete 0:18 -Co on powiedział? (What did he say?) -Mówi że jesteśmy ładne. (He says we are pretty) 0:29 -Duże capuccino 2:45 -On nie jest gruby na szczęście (He is lucky not to be fat) -Zaraz mu pęknie szal (His shawl is about to burst) 3:58 -Wygląda jak starszy brat Marka (He looks like Mark's older brother) -Ten, który ukradł Markowi samochód? (The one who stole Mark's car?) -Tak, ten na kim się [...] (Yes, the one which ..?????) -Łajdak! (Scoundrel!) -[...] Irony and comedy excellent Very big effort for Polish, but the effect so-so. Towards the end someone gave the actresses very long hard complex words and they didn't pronounced all consonants. This was cruel joke on them, there are easier words to use.