Can You Live Entirely Off of Evangelion Merchandise? 

If there arent condoms ,shinji runs the risk of die of aids or something

They wouldn’t be condoms, they’d be at fields

YOU WERE RIGHT. _I WASN'T READY FOR THE BOWLING PINS._

I was about to ask whether this is a thing as well hahaa

They have fist of the north star and gundam condoms that's honestly shocking

They know they are making and that is what matters.

@Martín Morales it's not even a genuine smile

@Wth happened to my name would make a Lot of Sense actually

Kaworu is alive but Toji doesn't exist Equivalent exchange

@Martín Morales she sure smiled a lot at the end of End Of Evangelion

I'm pretty sure there is evonne Gillian marriage certificates

Evangelion religion. Asuka died for our sins.

The priest asking if they’re worthy of each other’s grace as the audience sobs

In their official Eva tuxes, with their Eva reception afterwards.

@@kingdomkey63 please be wrong about that. Please.

Shinji in the anime: 🥛🥛🖐️

​@@rakusheruWHAT THE FU-

​@@rakusheruok we gotta stop this

​@@rakusheru That's not anime that's something start with the letter H. 💀

@@rakusheru💀cranking the Soulja boy i see

that's just insane like- holy shit, I didn't think NGE was THAT popular

you (cannot) escape

@@drx737 You can run, but you can ( not ) hide.

how i aspire to be you

nah, Unit-01's got it's new S2 Engine so everything's fine

@@salmanmahyuddin8384 just don't suffer an accident on it or we're all fucked

@@salmanmahyuddin8384 Then the electric car should never run out of fuel

Maria Schleh that would be one very long cord, considering I don’t think the Evas even had few miles long cord in the show.

Oh no! This car goes berserk. It's a motorcycle now!

Yep that's where she got me too.

He makes his daily commute on the evangelion traim

It's an unfamiliar ceiling

...Bob Dole missed that there is an offically licened Eva appartment.

And looks at the officially branded Eva ceiling

"Congratulations"

I don’t know know

Congratulations!

Yes, but you can’t work on Mondays.

garfield phone👍

yes

That is not even up for debate.

Garfield is essentially the American equivalent of Evangelion, after all.

you mean with your Unit-02 intestines?

Blasphemy. The only thing allowed to be up in kaworu’s guts is shinji’s spear of Longinus

I use the eva-005 heart and the eva-001 lungs and eva-002 stomach organs pack.

I could only afford the mass production eva organs.. They They laugh at me at night

You gonna have some fanta with that?

Mad Lad Along with Tokyo Ghoul and POSSIBLY NieR Automata. Idk what Yoko Taro’s state of mind was when he wrote that story.

vgman94 tokyo ghoul didnt make me depressed but since i watched the series and the end of evangelion a few days ago, im more depressed than before

@@vgman94 Yoko Taro's state of mind is a constant "I wonder how I can give the people who buy my media permanent depression."

@@vgman94 NieR Automata was like Evangelion. Absolutely perfect.

You know what they say: “If you’re good at something, never do it for free” Now how to sell depression?

holy fucking shit

Best comment.

@Eru Clusivus Step 1: Read book Step 2: Read more book Step 3: ??? Step 4: No profit!

majimaaaaaaaaaaaaa

They mass produced Che's face on a t-shirt. Capitalism has no morality just supply and demand.

Well said

and then rebirth sarcastically gave the fans what they wanted

Until the last 30 seconds, that is lmao

Jamie Does Stuff Fanboys!

My name isn’t Shinji.

Jamie Does Stuff talk about an hour-long photo

@Nill Null I mean, I am sure he gets enough free samples of most of eva themed merchandise to pull this off

Clearly they’re not obsessed enough.

*cough* Star wars *cough*

For those who have seen EoE "milking the superhero" has a completly different meaning

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

*cough* Ice Age *cough*

@Neil Brown i used "worthless" because saying i don't like something is not edgy enough for my personal opinion :(

omg-

Lol

Haven't laughed so hard at a comment in a while

Bout to cop them eva yeezy's 🔥

Kanye is a bit of weeb, so he might make it happen

Yup, you got it.

Yeah pretty much

Yep

Yup, but Star Wars at least have sense, seeing the vision of George Lucas. In Evangelion... doesn't have any sense.

Asriel Dreemurr The Dark Knight yes it does you just have to watch every 50 minute video you can find and try to piece it together yourself!

They do exist, with a.t shield branding.

looool

So that's why he always being cold and jerk all the time

@@gentaillahi6153 Man abandoned his child and enacted an apocalyptic prophecy only because he needed a good shave!

All of his evilness was stored in the beard

@@ManuJM-gw3je because it was a neckbeard

And Rei fucking blushing at him... what the fuck...

Minus condoms

Eva Conspiracy Theories?

@@luisalbertoarenasaraya4579 The Second Impact was an inside job! _wait a minute_

@@luisalbertoarenasaraya4579 Rei is dead man, miss her, miss her

@@thatdude2508 that's entirely useless considering the only use of one would be on a person willing to buy Evangelion condoms, who is better known as a hyper-ultra-mega-turbo-virgin

ToTally You dont choose it, it chooses you....

Its not a lifestyle its a religion

@@yourbrainonegg159: it's like the gosple from re:zero! also i was an atheist before i saw "god himself replied" then i saw it was on an evangelion video, coincidence! i think not!

Lol

@@yourbrainonegg159 we do have angels so maybe

Don't expose us!

He about to pull up with the bowling pin “mascot” suit.

That would be me.

Revan 007 WHY?!

Obi wan voice “well of course I know him he’s me”

Me too. EVA-branded, of course!

Saame

Evangelion Rebuild was a pretty good antidepressant for me after watching the originals

"Shinji Ikari Raising Project" manga. For some cursed smiling Gendo. Because Yui is alive

The irony is how different the tone of the original series and movies are, to the products displayed

I love drinking humanity

@@Jovanoc r/cursedcomments

@@Jovanoc humanity restored ~

forbidden estus flask

Mmmm yes the blood of lilith

And also hedgehog dilemma and anti escapism.

fizzie Eva cologne is just bottled shinji tears

@@chez_fries1015 a cologne with hedgehog scent would be fitting.

anti social personality disorder encompasses psychopathy and sociopathy wdym

"Smells like blood"

I like that you specified that they only ate the rations and not the fish, since they're not Eva branded.

Making your apartment EVA-themed is not really that hard. Just stick some NERV posters, "Keep Out" and "WARNING" wall stickers, and paint the Systema Sephiroticum on your ceiling with glow-in-the-dark paint. I wanna know more about that EVA train

@@adrianoarne-ritz249 the eva train is driven using a entry plug type system. The train closed down after the conductors all got ptsd

And tbe Eva bullet train

@@adrianoarne-ritz249 yeah, but like, according to the rules its official merch. Why would they do it

@@chistinelane There actually is (or was) an entry plug on the train that you can play a video game whilst sitting in it and pose for photos.

Bruh I'd buy an EVA assault rifle in a heartbeat. As long as it's officially licensed lol.

200th like

And an EVA prog knife.

I don’t condone violence

Dude I literally know a guy IRL with a costume EVA AR, it isn't officially licensed though.

😂

did not do it intentionally and surley I did not use the official paint, but my bedroom is indeed Ayanami blue.

Silly marketing asside, it's a nice color. Maybe wouldn't do the whole room, but a feature wall or as trime it could be pretty...

my room is actually about the same color

My room is (still!) baby blue Yeeeaaaaah, close enough.

There've been several different full series DVD releases.

Actually they did saw them on google

There are several DVDs split into parts and fully complete. The only downfall is they’re very expensive

It's on Netflix now maybe Kissanime work just fine

@@deadpeach07 The Netflix version is absolutely disgusting. You can find many reasons in many, MANY RU-vid videos.

Baron Blight yes

Just slap the colours purple and green on literally anything you can think of and call it a day

Interdimensional merchandise campaigns?

Even in the show Nerv seems to have merchandise

In-Universe, this might actually be a really good marketing campaign. You know how they sell millions of products with a celebrity's face or branding on it? That, but with the literal defenders of humanity who are constantly on the news fighting things in cool robot suits.

😥😥

"Yeah me neither I was just wondering"

Sounds like the anime

For added immersion, this scene happens whilst they are on the elevator

"and have shit tones of money"

@@s.k.5845 "and I'm gay"

Slimeustas - Official JK Rowling quote

You gotta mix cuteness with depression somehow

That's nothing compared to the other shit Hello Kitty had done.

Cherries Well at least that explains why I want them in particular

There’s Hello Kitty X - Acto blades, Hello Kitty chainsaws, and a friggin Hello Kitty Vocaloid named Iroha.

Rei-Kitty is posing at the toaster

Which one?

@@phosphorus1087 the anime man- he did an Evangelion video

Forget firearms, I want an officially licensed Evangelion N2 mine-themed nuclear warhead

rei k-15

With a Eva M9

Rei-k 47

Iced out aiyanami pendant

There are Eva water bottles. At least one of the two exists.

LucasLucas Lucas nah I ain't talkin water bottles, I wanna see Eva brand H2O

@@Rusty_Spy there is Eva mineral water, I'm sure. I have some Steins;Gate branded one, so Eva almost surely exists.

Those two bottles of Asuka and Rei's body when Shinji grabs his tumbler are sold with water in 'em.

does an eva ac/fan count? maybe a eva air purifier? and eva britta filter jug?

I wanna breath LCL.

I want to breathe depression when I get sick

BREATH THE TEARS

get me an evangelion heart implant so i can BLEED EVANGELION

Same

According to the pinned comment that's the one thing they *don't* have

Or perhaps a Rei or Asuka themed onahole to perch between his thighs

*Or Woman (no attack helicopters allowed!)

Davido-kun from "Davido-kun loves japan" would be a good future candidate.

The Atheist Bear DIscRiMiNaTIoN

Lavender Wolf REEEEEEE!!!! XD

Of course I know him. He's me!

Subterranean Planaria I actually burst out laughing

Evangelion IS an anti-depressant

Gabe H no its the opposite. Especially the end of evangelion

@@gabrielhubert226 have you ever seen evangelion

@Subteranean Planaria Actual LOL thank you.

The idea of having merch branded with Rei and Asuka is amazingly ironic.

Rei: "I'm not your doll!" *can literally buy dozens of different dolls and figures of her*

So you haven’t seen many mecha shows?

Hunger Games would be a close second. “Hey, you know that book about a dystopian ultra-capitalist regime oppressing the common people? Here’s a tie-in subway meal!”

@@Davies46 Especially Rei

😭lmaooo

I need a link to that fanfiction

I would read that

So Meta

I need that fanfic

Nice

Nice

Nice

Nice

Nice

*other struggling anime countries* "It's not FAIR" *errreg errreg*

Evangelion is not a Gainax Idea. Is an Anno Idea. No, false. Gainax is an Evangelion Idea

Anno in 1994: "I made this because of my mental health is shit. Anno in 2019: "I remake this because MONEY!"

LMAO

Gendobus

r/cursedcomments

The difference is that Gainax isn't Illumination, nor have they ever been. Illumination just makes cheap CG-animated films with the same formula repeatedly where as Gainax is less formulaic and has worked with 2D.

@@Code7Unltd the difference is that now there is only one incredibly annoying thing, called shinji

@@thejayscraft9975 Are the minions still around?

@@Tarantulawl i hope not

@@thejayscraft9975 They unfortunately are

Sounds like a cool movie

Malware it’s the real 4.44

@@kennethrapp1379 No, it's a dystopia. **Curls up and cries at lack of Gurren Lagann equivalency**

I think that was the point.

I'm pretty sure Evangelion is also a dystopia of sorts

2 months later dude

4 months later

You can choose between the SEELE "Sound Only" Monolith or an entry-plug themed coffin. LCL not included.

evangelion visa card

He doesn't have money anymore.

CloudySkies17695 they’re should be

@@ciclon5682 kept in his official evangelion wallet

He receives it all on Evangelion checks and only does transactions via Evangelion debit or credit cards

And gendo

@@charisma7268 ESPECIALLY Gendo.

aupa atheletic

300th like

@@gabbyn.3049 unlike Rei I haven't seen that man smile at least once nor do I think he have the ability to smile

*Progressive Knife*

Hahahahahahaha

@@CaptainPriceONDATRAINFR100 🗡

*Anno swimming in money*:"Hell yeah"

thanks capitalism or else we wouldnt have this video

@@wheresmyrooptoff4056 Nah it still sucks.

@@ChangedMyNameFinally69 ask the Kulaks, Ukrainians, Kazakhs, Cambodians, Venezuelans, North Koreans, and Han Chinese how they feel about the glorious alternative based off le hungry hammer.

@@mrmediocre1532 the Kulaks were landlords, I don't give a shit lol. There's still Ukranians who want communism back (just not under Soviet imperialism, I know complexity isn't your strong suit but please keep up), same with Kazahks and Cambodians, though there's a lot of propaganda and lying there, Venezuela is provably capitalist so I don't know where you get your information from, North Korea isn't a good example, especially with how little we know, and China isn't communist anymore. Dude, you've lost, stop trying. You realize no ideology is perfect and communism can be altered to be more moral right? You don't probably know because red bad but still

Drink your evangelion wine with some evangelion shot glass

with some evangelion packed peanuts

lmao it would have to be like 0.5% alcohol for you to survive

The game is called "alcoholism"

Then someone else can call the hospital using that EVA cellphone for EVA alcohol poisioning

Keep it at 69 likes or else

I found them too named LCL bathsalt

@@evilspongebobpopsticle9541 I definitely would not wanna bathe in the collective counciousness of humanity.

@@bradleypearl2986 THE UNENLIGHTE-

Shinji get off the train

@Why Am I Still Here no

The train was sadly discontinued and now it's in a museum of sorts I don't really know, oh and btw that's technically cannon so after third impact Shinji created a reality where he drove a train and fought angels and stuff

@@ivaneyherabide3204 pardon P A R D O N?

@@ivaneyherabide3204 wait wut

YES

L-Lewd!

@@spacepotatoes2019 It's not that hard to accomplish. Just buy one on the internet and ask one of your friends to do so. The only downsides may be the fact that an _official_ Asuka Dakimakura may not exist, and other people's opinion on you, lol.

@@spacepotatoes2019 Pay someone to do so.

And if they're business expenses, you can deduct them by filing the officially licenced Evangelion 1040