Chapo Trap House - True Allegiance Compilation 

Yeah this moron cries on twitter about shit like rap music and movies like Star wars. He is exactly like them

@@AQGOAT24 he also ranted for half an hour about John Lennon's Imagine

@Lord Dingus yeah that was terrible :D

“Ahkmed became increasingly irritated. How could one BE a walrus and yet have the cognitive ability to write a song about being a walrus?”

What does it mean to be bad... AND boujee?

Exactly what I was thinking LMAO

Glad I wasn't the only one. Also, is that a bass I spot in your profile pic?

Post Malone not being black makes it even more perfect

Sorry for the late reply, but it's a Hallmark Custom 60, 6 string

If he wrote it in the early 00s it would have been Snoop Eminemdre.

Me too.

Same here

Celtic O’Malley

Leprechaun McBarfight

Patty McGuinness

I mean, the reactionary position has always been that child murder is good, as long as the children being murdered aren't white. It is still funny because, yeah, even if LeeVonne or whatever his name is set the kid up, even in Ben's ridiculous scenario the cop is STILL the one who's obviously in the wrong. Even those retarded TV shows about cops can at least figure out that if you're going to try to justify police assassinations of civilians, you've got to try a little harder than this. Like, Officer Shamrock O'Prodtaigahan could have just, you know, ignored the kid and gone back to firebombing cathedrals or tossing the Pope's salad or whatever Irishmen do of a day, and LeeVonn's whole scheme would have fallen flat on its face. And Officer Paddy McBogtrotter should have blown his brains out after realizing what he'd done, to really drive home that when the fat blue line has to shoot a civilian four hundred times in the back in front of his wife and kids, the police are the REAL victims, not the dead children or whatever. Why didn't Ben write it so that VeeLonne dressed up as a cop and murdered the kid himself in order to frame the police? You know, just to completely detach from reality and enter a fantasy world where the stupid fascists terrorizing our streets are actually misunderstood heroes who are being heinously discredited by the evil brown people.

I was laughing up until that reveal. What the fuuuuuuck

Seriously, I’m legitimately going to lose my shit if I ever meet Ben Shapiro IRL. Show him exactly what he wants to see from black people.

@@bbluva20 fuck his mind instead by wearing a homer simpson shirt

@Porky A better question would be this: "Do you want revive The Troubles?" I'm not sure if you know what The Troubles are; it was a thirty-year period of time that was defined by violent attacks perpetrated by the Irish Republican Army against the British military in the hopes of removing British soldiers from Northern Ireland and uniting with the Republic of Ireland. It is also a time wherein Catholics were routinely beaten, stabbed or shot by the British military and homes as well as businesses that were allegedly or actually owned by Catholics were bombed. The Troubles is generally considered to have started in 1968 with the Battle of the Bogside and ended with the signing of the Good Friday Agreement of 1998.

Yes 100%. The reference to "white republican club kid" was such a giveaway. He got humiliated and immediately fantasized about him either getting killed by the cops or becoming a criminal.

Change debate to girlfriend, and you got it.

@@cambriaofthevastoceans6721 It was like those old movies where Ben lost the debate and now his girlfriend doesn't want to be with a loser, she wants a winner.

Probably "debate" AND "girlfriend."

@@mainlente1212 what are you guys thinking about? Ben never HAD a girlfriend to lose in the first place!

"If you want a vision of the future, it is this: a human face, licking a shiny, shiny, shiny boot of leather forever"

bruh i read this smut about veggietales and it was Shakespeare compared to this

high school and college kids who spend their time roleplaying and posting fics on ao3 are by and large better writers than ben here

@@happybadger3351 why were you reading veggietale smut?

Like it actually bothers me that fanfic writers with infinitely better writing will never make a penny from their stuff and this fucking midget shits out absolute drivel and sells it for 20$ a pop.

I’m honestly shocked at just how bad it is. I’m not surprised it’s super racist. But I figured that his prose must just be mediocre. Nope! Even the way he writes sentences is inept!

The best way to read the novel is to interpret the president as the choas dragon and the babes as the order Phoenix. And then go to dave rubin show to complain about how the left hates the army

That's why you play the video at 2x

Say "hypothetically" at least once a sentence, too.

And plug your nose while reading it aloud

Kenpachi Zaraki Exactly.

It doesn't need to be. It could just say "Facts don't care about your feelings" over and over again and people would buy it. Because they're idiots.

Listen, there is a non-zero chance that there are plenty of non-self-respecting ghost riders

And more effective. Plus, Shapiro wouldn't be able to criticize it without being a hypocrite.

much more effective. This book is way more cringe than anything SJWs have done

Alejandro Rodriguez awesome

Ben sapphiro? Was this written by bens gay female counterpart?

Zevaron XZ how is making his counterpart gay any different from how our pal ben here is with his repressed "he was a Bear of a man" desires?

Gunning a kid down is a totally appropriate response to insults

shooting a child to own the libs

Calling someone a “cracka” is basically felonious assault, especially if they’re a thin-skinned cop.

In all seriousness, I think Ben was trying to write reference Tamir Rice since he briefly mentioned the kid had a plastic gun. However, this is not only a weird strawman of what happened--but it's a strawman that was used to argue against people like him. There is no way where Ben Shaprio isn't bad at this.

Yeah but BLM made him do it, thereby absolving Officer O'Famine of any personal responsibility.

I think he'd just reflectively say everything is 'taken out of context' even when they're not.

@@spindoctor358 solution: read the entire book in response to everything he says

That reminds me of a quote from the movie "Bombshell" where the character of Jess (portrayed by Kate McKinnon) is explaining to Kayla Pospisil (Margot Robbie) what it takes for her to be an on-air anchor at Fox News. Jess explained to Kayla that in order to be an on-air anchor at Fox News; Kayla must "adopt the mentality of an Irish street cop. The world is a bad place, people are lazy morons, minorities are criminals, sex is sick but interesting." Kayla would also have to constantly ask herself "What would scare my grandmother or piss off my grandfather?"

Maybe German or polish but no too many Irish in Detroit

Officer potato O’ Famine is the Irishman

But do you wear material around your face?

So your dad is the Iron Sheik?

Noh Buddy He was the Prince of Persia

Ouch. I remember learning that the Iran-Iraq War was the first time in the modern world that a person who is in a position of power used Sarin gas on civilians. Sadam Hussein unleashed Sarin gas on thousands of Kurds in the final days of the war. Though when most people hear the phrase "Sarin gas attack" they think of one of two events: 1.) The 2014 attack on civilians in Syria by Bashar al-Assad. 2.) The 1995 attack on the subway system of Tokyo, Japan by the extremist religious cult known as Aum Shinrikyo. I am not entirely surprised by attack in Syria as it was done by a person in government; I am more surprised by the Tokyo subway attacks because it occurred in one of the safest countries in the world as well as the fact that the perpetrators were some of Japan's best and brightest and gotten great educations at some of Japan's most prestigious universities; Tokai University, Kogukua University, and Waseda University.

One crack please

Pandemic! Got that pandemic! WMD! Got that WMD!

Rev up those fryers!

@@Moyano__ aaaaaa

Read this in Bens voice

Do it.

It's been a year, how's your book going?

@@deanwoodward1353 Good. I've got two pages down already and I've only mentioned FBI crime statistics and ethnostates 6 times.

@@Moreoverover do minute details make you horny as you write? Can't forget that

@@deanwoodward1353 Hell yes cummed on the pages, use that as my signature.

At least it’s not 9,000 fucking pages long like Atlas Shrugged

You can definitely see the Atlas Shrugged inspiration here, given the dry, wooden dialogue, the amateurish prose, and the childishly simplistic worldview.

It's at least slightly better than The Fountainhead

It's on par with the Turner diaries.

Ayn Shapirand.

Conservative fiction rules because they literally can't let anything go.

Editor?

Ben: "Let's say the exposition wasn't long enough. Let's also say I want to insert a political statement." (Wiggles head erratically) Editor: "...Yeah, I'm done."

I doubt an editor was involved

Soy-sippin' libs just don't understand the rough and tumble ways of good ol boys who go by "Bill", "Bill-meister", "The Bill-dozer", "The Bill-doe" etc.

It reminds me a bit of Left Behind, where the protagonists are also objectively vile people, and the authors don't even notice.

You fucking nailed it.

The most disturbing thing is that everybody's eating that book up. The 60 years old conservatives that think that they should be allowed to say negro love it

@death wish, Left Behind had two authors/writers: Jerry Jenkins and Tim LaHaye. The two male protagonists, Cam-Cam and Flyboy, were blatant Gary Stus, and also huge jerks in ways Jenkins and LaHaye clearly thought were totally fine. (I mean, unless you were joking that they don't deserve to be called "authors" because the books suck. No argument there!)

honestly, i've been told to fuck off and leave many times and i have shot zero (0) people.

IF YOU LIKE ICE CREAM SO MUCH WHY DON'T YOU MARRY IT??? -Ben Shapiro, probably.

The fact that Post Malone is white makes it even funnier.

Poe Tate O’Famine

¡Viva el POUM!

That's a viva.

yr obt svt No...no...NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Scot Macmillan I tell myself that all the time lol

Yeah but your friend who thinks that is probably lacking as a literary critic. He might think it's downright Shakespearean.

Yeah being a kid sucks because literally anything left at all is considered being a pussy But look we don't need a razor commercial to tell us to stop calling boys pussies

@@polishpipebomb No. We need a trans woman dressed like Liberace.

Virjunior Yeah, as if Shapiro wasn’t dehumanizing enough to the fictional child he had written exclusively to get murdered.

oh he def wants to be topped

Probably wants to watch his wife, who is a doctor, take that Army D. All those conservative theists are cucks.

Topped... definitely

Bit of both

Was it in the erotica section?

Thank you for your service, Erica :D

Erica C Hahahahahahahaha is your profile picture satire or is that really you?

@@cloejarozenski5109 why are you insulting people like this?

@@cloejarozenski5109 You're a mean person.

Oh my God that would rule

It sounds fake half the time, though.

I. Fischer-tree that's just because Matt has no true joy left in his shriveled heart

Yes. I can relate.

Why are so many airport books about terrorist attacks, anyways?

@@basedeltazero714 "How do we convince people that the NSA isn't useless... I KNOW!"

Ease up on the commas. Add some action. Plenty of titties. Only write for the screen. Good luck, shit's hard.

​@@michaelhall5429 Sorry for the late reply, here's an excerpt: ' "I am very angry at you." Anime-Chan said angrily, her titties bouncing angrily. "Not as angry as I am at you, nyah!" Titetta yelled, even more anger in her voice. Their titties bounced as the punched each other in the face a bunch, tits bouncing. It was intense, sexy, awesome, epic, serious, hot, I just came, epic, really cool, and all that. Explosion.' I think I have a promising career ahead.

@@mikejeffries3333 quality.

Six Pump sounds like it should be Shapiro's nickname

LOL!!! I love Decker.

Tim Heidecker as Bret Hawthorne could quite possibly be the single greatest achievement in cinema history. We're talking AT LEAST 5 bags of popcorn and 3 *LARGE* sodas.

"True Allegiance" is MAGgot porn!

You put the thing in the other thing or whatever, right?

I would have casted Nick Jonas as Brett Hawthorne and Jennifer Lopez as Soledad Ramirez.

I'm on my, I dunno, fourth or so listen. This is the most timeless reading series they've done so far.

I do too

Back here for, I think, my 4th time.

I'm on my fourth listen, too.

If listening to this over and over again is weird I don't want to be normal.

litoo2002 At least The Room had some heart and you can find entertainment value from it despite it being unintentional, True Allegiance is fucking disgusting and this is the only source of enjoyment to come out it.

don't compare tommy wisseau to this shit

You know it's bad when The Room is the "good version"

It's a bad version of the Turner Diaries.

One of them is a mess of strange grammar, bizarre plot, unlikable characters, terrible motivations, awful flow, and all around horror. The other is the 2003 cult classic film "The Room", directed by Tommy Wiseau, starring Tommy Wiseau, Greg Sestero, and Juliette Danielle. (Yes I am aware that this joke is overused)

No general goes anywhere without a cadre of self protection and air support. The only general we had die in Afghanistan was a low one star who was killed while surrounded by his own men, on a friendly base, by a deranged afghan army soldier. Tldr: fuck no they don't go anywhere without massive protection

William Calhoun No. We don’t.

All the bad guys have more skin stapled on, a reverse circumsision.

A bear is slang for a big hefty hairy gay guy. 'Otter' is a smaller, younger bear.

It wouldn't surprise me if Ben has a copy of "The Turner Diaries" on his bedside table. I just hope that Ben doesn't write a sequel to "True Allegiance" but if he does; I would be somewhat interested if he sets the book during The Troubles as we could get an idea of what Ben's views on Northern Ireland are. For those who don't know what The Troubles are; they are defined as a thirty-year period of violence, terror and despair in the British Isles with the parties being the Irish Republican Army and the British military. The IRA was determined to have British soldiers removed from Northern Ireland and to unite with the Republic of Ireland under the leadership in Dublin. The British military was determined to stop the violence in Northern Ireland and make sure that Northern Ireland would remain under the rule of the British government in London. The Troubles are generally considered to have started in 1968 with the Battle of the Bogside and ended with the signing of the Good Friday Agreement of 1998. Ben would probably depict the Catholic population of Northern Ireland (and by extension the IRA) as violent murderous thugs who get excited over burning homes and businesses owned by Catholics as well as setting off car bombs in addition to beating, stabbing or shooting Protestant citizens, police officers and British soldiers. Ben would probably depict the British soldiers, Protestant community and the police forces of Northern Ireland as good people who were desperate to stop the IRA.

As much of a meme as Ben is, the turner diaries is extremely antisemitic why would Ben like it.

@@DrSPF23 his book does veer dangerously close to some day of the rope type stuff, but ever since being bullied by the far right during his breitbart days ben has to draw the line somewhere

​​​@@DrSPF23Ben is a very dimwitted man who fails to realize he's made his living courting an audience only one degree removed from and on a trajectory to become the kind of people who want to see him put in a gas chamber.

You can honestly write "Penis" on a napkin and it'd be a New York Times bestseller

Tbf thatt only means it sold well. I imagine the NYT review would be less than glowing.

Can’t that list be manipulated by having someone just buy a ton of copies to artificially inflate sales numbers?

@@samiamrg7 Actually that is how politicians and pundits books reach to the best sellers, their force their aides and their workers to buy the book so they can inflate the sales numbers and reach to the New York Best Sellers, the editors don't give a fuck about the actual quality of the books, and they are afraid of their corporate overlords, so they wont do actually quality control. In this sphere is all about patting themselves in the back and flatter each other egos.

samiamrg7 yes that’s called the Buckskin Brigade or L. Ron Hubbard tactic

It's amazing what money can do for someone. We don't live in a meritocracy, we live in a society where the ideas that get funding get a platform. There are many great artists that are never published because of this.

went from a dumb but fun 90s action thriller to something genuinely offensive- venturing dangerously close to white supremacist literature

@@yareyarejose5080 I mean that is Bencil Sharpener's M.O.

Do you mean Skeeter Valentine?

@@benphillips2947 I'm talking about President Funny Valentine from jojo SBR

Ryan Joyce His vision is unclouded. Everything he does, he does for J U S T I C E.

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

I imagine him as John Prescott.

Why am I not surprised by that?

ben cant even try to envision proportions of a person taller than 5'7

saintdenis11 I guess Ben Shapiro just perceives anybody taller than 5’7” and heavier than 116 pounds as being a “bear of a man”.

@ryne green Oh don't get me wrong - liberals make bad art. Chapo take great joy in pointing out the horror show that is SNL. But maybe with a few exceptions like A-game Clint Eastwood and Gary Oldman (DW Griffith and Riefenstahl to go back further), only the left consistently produces excellent art. I think it's probably got something to do with a lack of interest in empathy and introspection on the right. I don't think today the right could ever produce didactic films as effective as _Sorry to Bother You_ or _Blindspotting_ or _BlacKkKlansman_ .

PurushaDesa They’d end up glorifying the Klan in those movies.

95% of conservative ideology is just needing a daddy.

Well there’s Tom Clancy.

Yeah it sucks as some of the authors were pretty good until they discovered how many more books they could sell if they wrote everything as just right wing fantasy porn.

The last Roman is a terrible one if you wanna torture yourself