@@Laurkiller depends on your social status and if there are friends of yours to laugh with you as you make the joke. Aside from context, It also matters a lot how you execute it.
@@Laurkiller Only negative people would see it like that. I would find it funny, and if I didn't, I would brush it off as a poorly delivered or thought out joke. Assuming that person is generally bad, is questionable.
This site is literally fixing my aspergers. Ive learned more about reading body language in just a few short months watching these videos than all the years of socializing i have done so far. Thank you COC.
@@TheActionTourist it depends on how you choose to utilize the information provided that determines if you learned something for others to believe you retained the idea.
Some NOTES here 1. FOCUS ON SETTING THE TONE: Pick one tone that suits you best. First 10-20 sec of any new interaction or place rather than worrying about what to say next focus on setting the tone. It could be Touch, greeting loudly, energetic, raise hand, smile. 2. LAUGHING WITH YOUR EYES: Get emotionally involved in what you saying that way it’s real fun for you. That way your eyes will naturally goto that laughing look 3. GENUINE EYE-CONTACT: After looking away - return your eyes to the person that you are speaking to that way they feel involved. Deliver strong eye-contact during the punchline. 4. TEASNG AND LAUGHING AT PEOPLE VS COMPLIMENT OTHERS AND SELF DEPRECATING HUMOR: Make a humor of people with same status. Compliment people who are below & above you. 5. GOAL SHOULD BE TO FEEL GOOD: Ultimate goal of conversation shouldn’t be look charming. Ask yourself what would make this conversation more fun. As always, my passion is to share summaries like started doing it on my channel with PDF summaries.✌ Lets make it effortless😃
Thanks! I'd love to hear examples! I thunk self-improvement is fantastic, but I am skeptical how many people successfully implement these ideas on their own. Each week there are 5-10 suggestions to improve life and this adds up to 100s of different techniques and strategies. That is a lot! Have you seen real change and progress? Have your friends and family noticed an increase in confidence and social skills? I think that would be a great and compelling motivation for people to hear about. And, very inspiring!
@@Mensmentalwealth911 This has been a game changer for my relationships, both professional and social. I watched his video on interviews, and landed a better paying, more satisfying position. I watched his videos on conversation and began implementing. Now i can confidently say that im almost always having a great time with great people.
Michael. This one has helped me. But I started doing open mic comedy in Cincinnati Ohio. It is easy to get a spot on a weekeday. You need practice. You've got to push yourself to put yourself out there. You just can't just read this stuff and expect results. I use the video on my cell phone. I show it to friends and get feedback.
@@JimPaul0627 Great! That's what I want to know. The internet can be a great place to share ideas and information. Unfortunately, I'm not sure how many people implement these ideas on an ongoing and consistent basis. Glad to hear that you are!
What's amazing about George Clooney's charisma is much of it can be used by naturally introverted people. The subtleties without needing to make large gestures is hugely beneficial. It's qualities I've learnt to apply in my own life
It's all about being you in any environment and being strong enough internally to not depend on others for value (keep your frame) - all while being refined and sophisticated. All of this will keep you from looking like you want attention. Those with high value don't feel the need to take on crazy styles or seek shock value from their statements. People notice when you are trying to get attention (crazy hair style and then pretending like you're just "expressing yourself," shock-value statements not based on you being honest but to try to bring attention to yourself). If you have real confidence, you don't seek it in artificial ways and know that it will come naturally. Seeking it artificially actually just makes you look desperate to seem cool or "different," or whatever. Self-belief says, "I don't have to do something outlandish to seek attention. In fact, I don't have to seek attention. I receive it naturally."
When I was young I believe I did the "shock value" thing. I am a very calm person and when I made krass jokes people had to laugh because it was such a contrast, I kind of got popular but I always felt like not myself. I believe you can be popular with shocking jokes, but the question is wether you feel good
I know some friends of friends who actually know George. They've said the reason people enjoy talking to him is if you're 1 on 1, he makes you feel like you're the only 1 in the room. He holds your eyes, smiles easily, and his self-deprecating humor. He likes people and is still friends, at 60 something, with his high school friends after 40 some years so he's very down to earth. They say he's not stuck up or star like. His personality is charming but it's how he treats others well and enjoys talking to people.
I’ve been binge watching your videos for a couple weeks and I can honestly say that in this short amount of time, my issues with social anxiety have already improved quite a bit. Within a few days of applying a couple of these habits, I’ve noticed that I’m a lot more at ease in conversation with both strangers and people I already know. I’ve also noticed that my relationships with people at work (including bosses) have been blossoming and people are starting to show me more respect. I feel like my job performance has been steadily improving as well. It’s honestly mindblowing how a change in mindset can make a world of difference. Not every day is perfect though, I occasionally slip back into moments of self doubt or anxiousness and it’s not always easy to rebound, but the more I keep working at it and making an effort to implement what I’m learning, it keeps getting easier to bounce back. I’m so grateful that I’ve found this channel and I can’t wait for what’s in store for me and the people around me! Thank you so much
@@MikeJackson690 yep that's about it , guys can do their best ,but in the end being good looking will work better than trying to emulate something that you ain't . These vids are 99.9 % useless to average guys.
1. Set the tone. Entering the room. Basically linger and smile as well as greet everyone in the room. First 10-20 seconds SET THE TONE! 2. Physical Placing = leads to physiological comfort and makes you feel like you’re in your own living room. Crossing legs and being open. 3. Laugh with your eyes. Get emotionally involved without your saying. 4. Genuine eye contact = looking down whilst creating thought is normal. Yet after gathering thoughts, make eye contact often. Best time to deliver eye contact is in most important moment. Makes strong eye contact during punch line
These things are largely social manners that gave been lost in the online generation. I've lost a lot of it myself due to it being easier not to engage with everyone. These are great videos and much needed.
Step 1 smile be warm friendly and relaxed. Makes everyone else feel the same. Step 2. Be engaging, tease, make jokes and compliment depending on your evaluation of the other's ego. Step 3 Enjoy yourself, leave on a high to get others wanting more of a fix of you for making Them feel good in one way or another.
Your tips on mentality/tone and eye contact are really helping me here. I have been watching your channel since I got diagnosed with ASD and it has really helped me relate to and feel comfortable around normal(neurotypical) people a lot more. Thank you very much :D
This lesson was a great reminder in what the primary goal is within a social interaction: to feel good with, and around others. Because we all want to have a good time with friends and the people we want to be around, and sometimes the most obvious takeaway is the most poignant. Once I started the habit of imagining everyone in a room that I’m walking into is talking about me with cheer and excitement, it helps all the techniques taught here regarding how to enter a room come a lot more naturally.
People tell me, mostly men, they love my energy. I think it's the same thing as this video explains. I'm in sales and I find it so much fun interacting with people. I love to breakdown the customers who have that "leave me alone" mentality and see how fast I can convert them over to me. It's a fun challenge and it makes everyday an adventure!
@@theobserver8 people like to talk about themselves so in my line of work it's a little easier to do that but within a few minutes I bring humor into the conversation. It's like magic!
@@janinemillirons2927 please mam tell me your secret! I would LOVE to know what you do to even manage to charm everyone around you. As a teen, who just wants friends, I would love that!
CU has helped me become a better police officer. When I'm interviewing/interrogating suspects I really do feel the skills I've learned from here have gotten me to break down those barriers and help them be more comfortable telling me things. it especially has helped with my older population.
I think that what is missing about clooney is that he is a natural leader, the video focuses só much on how he feels comfortable, but more importantly, he has a charming way to lead other people emotions.
The best compliment I ever got in my life was 3-4 years ago when I was in my early forties. My girlfriend's young co worker told her that she thought I looked like George Clooney. While not even close to the truth it made me feel great, charming, debonair and confident. Whenever I'm faced with a new social challenge like a job interview or meeting the gf's parents etc, I say to myself. "I am George Clooney". In a Michael Keaton's Batman voice. I always laugh of loud at the obsurdity of that statement but laughing at myself calms me, puts me in a relaxed frame of mind and a relaxed/jovial mood that transfers into my mannerisms. From there it's almost second nature to be charming and charismatic. Confidence is key as they say. Now I'm an introvert with a touch of social anxiety to boot. For 40 years I lacked confidence in myself and that showed in everything I did. I've been able to change my situation in life for the better. My confidence has grown tremendously with each new success and I don't need to say this ridiculous thing anymore to have charisma but you know what? I still do, every single day. It's important to me to stay grounded and true to what got me to where I am today.
I think being genuine is a critical component here. I had the pleasure of playing a part in the George Cooney movie, 'Up in the Air!'. He was equally pleasant to every person in the room--whether cast member, crew, or those serving food. Being genuine and being genuinely nice to others goes a long way. Inside note about Mr. Clooney: He is a good natured prankster! Always with a smile. Always with respect.
Pedro Andrade + yeah,You're right. Women don't judge as harshly as men do. Seems that most men believe they deserve a super model,won't settle for less. Women won't security. Ugly can do that.
@@cjok8367 "Women don't judge as harshly as men" LOL that was a joke right? Men overlook flaws. Women see nothing BUT flaws. Women are EXTREMELY judgmental.
@MrGunboat78 That's interesting! What about if you took the George Clooney part out of it, would you say his looks precede him? What if he wasn't famous, or what if he wasn't good looking? Do you still think people would draw to him?
I have started walking into my apartment to gentle canned applause. I find it puts me at ease as I cook dinner, which then is applauded further by my wife.
With how he hypes up lesser know people but joking puts himself and his contemporaries down is that he understands social ladders within subtext very well. Like he can joke around about him and his contemporaries because at the end of the day they’re still big, mega successful stars, and if he were to do that with interviewers, especially lesser known ones, it would come as a slight. Also him knowing that if he were to do the same about him and his contemporaries, it would give off a similar vibe, but by joking about them, it makes him and the others feel more magnetic takes down that mythical movie star armor which is what the best movie stars do
This channel has helped so much, at home and school! I have really good conversations with people and also know how to deal with people who pointlessly argue now:) cannot thank you enough
Props to you for saving your advertisement to last so people get to choose between watching it or liking and leaving. It goes to show how authentic you are.
Guys (and people in general) who make me feel comfortable are sooo gosh darn attractive; it’s like a lovely cocktail of kindness and gentle confidence ❤️
Being charming comes from inside. It comes from your attitude and intentions. They guide and control your actions, body language and tone of voice in a way that it charms people. This is not something you can imitate or fake or even create consciously and intentionally.
Exactly. Some people can fake it well at-least temporarily because they are good at imitating, others can't but it will never be as good as the real thing.
Also, practice. GC has been doing his thing for a long time, look at the range of clips. Hard to be surprised or uncomfortable when you've been practically working on charm for ages.
The simple fact that you are watching this video means that you are making the first step to challenge and overcome what's keeping you stuck from succeeding !
I don’t remember seeing him tense and nervous in public. He must have felt supremely comfortable in his own skin to take on the world in such an ease. I don’t think he’s coasting on his looks. There’s something grounding within him to manifest into how he projects outward.
Worked on a photo shoot with George Clooney. Super nice guy. He made a point to greet and shake hands with everyone on set then personally thank everyone at the end of the day.
As usual, these are great suggestions, but I'm still curious if anyone has actually implemented these strategies successfully? By my count, there are over 300 strategies that have been suggested over the last year that people would need to learn in order to improve themselves in various ways. I think self-improvement is fantastic and I'm glad that there are resources available to help people do that. However, has anyone actually implemented many or most of these strategies and changed their life? I'd love to hear yes! and get great stories and anecdotes! Ultimately, I think it is mind-set. If you have a positive and optimistic mind-set and engage in realistic and rational self-talk and minimize negative self-talk you will be just fine 90% of the time. The additional 10% might include learning specific skills such as being more assertive, but what you think impacts how your feel and how you act.
I’ve been told often how (a little) charming I am and I do a lot of these things in the ways you’ve explained. Now obviously, I’m not George Clooney but this was a great breakdown of what works and why. The point about making yourself comfortable - that’s a big one, I notice how dry I get when I’ve not taken the time to set the frame of interactions.
Qould love to see a Charisma on Command overview of: John Krasinski. Met so many guys like him in school, seemingly so effortlessly cool, gets the girl while somehow being quiet/introverted yet super funny at the same time. Idris Elba: A man's man. Leonardo DiCaprio. He's managed to be bulletproof in his public persona even though he's changed so much. From being the boyish megastar heartthrob, to being a kind of "old" hollywood icon who everybody still loves. Serge Gainsbourg. One of the ugliest men in music, yet was able to get away with proverbial murder and score Jane Birkin. What's his secret??
several other things that help with George Clooney's persona just based on watching this video: 1. the dude looks good. period. women generally don't throw themselves at ugly dudes. 2. he has a very warm, genuine personality. 3. he's very relaxed. whatever he does feels very natural 4. he's accomplished - extensive filmography & other awards.
Being handsome is as much learned as it is genetic. From hairstyles to attire, there's a lot you can do to improve your appearance without having been born with a chiseled jawline and the perfect facial hair.
@@KoolKyurem25 still without being born pretty you have just 1/2 of what you could possibly have but I agree with you, not even the prettiest face can shine without the right mindset :))
4:55 - Hacer contacto visual cuando digamos lo más gracioso o interesante. Pero no todo el rato, hay que mirar hacia abajo también y hacer contacto visual de vez en cuando para que el otro se sienta en la conversación. 5:58 - Saber equilibrar lo de reírse y juzgar a la gente (sin que se ofenda) y lo de dar cumplidos y se reirse de el mismo
You just made me realize why I have so many problems at work. My colleague think/feel I am on an above level or status and they feel I am bullying them when what I feel is quite the opposite and I just joke because under no circumstances I don't feel myself better.. I mean thank you.. I know how it sounds when I put it on words, but it suddenly make so much sense...
Right. I didn’t even know the meaning of relaxing till I took a lot of psychedelics well after graduation. They really should teach meditation in school or something. Modern youth is an.... intimidating experience.
If George looked like say George Constanza, he could act exactly the same and no one would be calling him charming. Attractiveness indicates subconsciously to others that you possess strong genetic fitness, therefore an indication that may have something of value to offer and garnering respect - i.e. charisma
1. Set the tone to what suits you best so you'll feel comfortable (0:16) 2. Have fun with what you say so your eyes will laugh (2:38) 3. Make sporadic eye contact (show those genuine eyes), especially at the punchline (3:57) 4. Make fun of yourself, tease those at your own or higher status level & support those at a lower status level (5:45) 9. Sum-up (8:51)
george clooney is a humble guy, he knows hes usually on top i think and that gives him plenty of leeway to raise other people up, he could let his ego get huge but nahh he doesnt nd thats charming
Ana Julia Zanatto i’m gonna do you a solid and pretend your comment was a joke. in reality, comments like yours can be damaging to people’s confidence, and it was an incredibly arrogant thing to say. be careful with what you say.
Kyrie R lol I try something like this but i tend to walk a bit slower and take the room in but I can tell someone is thinking why tf is he walking so slowww
George has polished his presentation, well he is an actor after all. What makes him effective is that his non-verbal communication matches his verbal communication. George is heavily non-verbal in his facial expressions. You can almost turn the sound off and still understand what he is saying. In seeing him in film, I think it is more difficult for George to actually tone down his non-verbal, that is become stoic.
Attractiveness is fluid. Young men have a harder time understanding this. If you groom yourself and style yourself and be conscious about how you present yourself physically you can be more attractive. It’s not binary.
Sothe advice on "setting the tone" would be great if I was walking on to the stage of a late night show with an audience. Most real life people in real situations start an interaction one on one. If I stopped an "set the tone" for 10-20 seconds, the person I was about to engage with would think me a lunatic.
One thing that popped to me on this is Milo who does not make eye contact consistently but he does when he looks up as he makes a point or to see if his point he was trying to make connected with the person he’s speaking with or the audience he’s speaking to...
Summary: Be a genuine human who is having fun. Look people in the eye like a human would. Poke fun at people with equal or higher status than you, don't poke fun at those with lesser status than you. Instead, compliment them and do self-deprecating humor. My Note: If you are not capable of letting loose and being a genuine human and looking people in the eye, then you probably have perfectionism or approval-seeking issues and you need to stop thinking that people are watching and judging you or that anyone gives a crap what you are doing. People are too caught up in their own lives to be watching and judging you... and these people are often too busy being worried about what others are thinking of them to watch and judge you. If you are living for others (approval) and not living for yourself... then you aren't alive at all, are you?
