Congress Forgets How To Pass A Law 

They shut down the government every so often

They just tried that, to no avail

Ask one of their kids to do it, they probably know how to do it

Thats what they're doing now

Rishi Chava did it work?

After the 9-11 responders kerfuffle...yeah.

Oh, wait, did I say "after"? I naively thought it had been resolved, but no, here's Rand Paul to screw it all up. Kentucky, you're single-handedly screwing up the Senate at the moment.

Well it's a nonpartisan issue, so it isn't really that unbelievable when you think about it.

roguishpaladin Generally speaking, the government’s inability to pass any laws is a good thing.

Bailey Harrison Lol, how? So he US remains outdated?

That line was savage 🤣

😂😂😂

Normal people also tags the time where it says. Wtf is wrong with u?

@@gregorgerzson1767 2:39 here you go 🙄

@@gregorgerzson1767 Normal people don’t cry about no time stamp when they’re gonna watch the entire video anyway.

It's literally across the street too

They're even connected by a tunnel lmao

capitol*

The equivalent of congressional investigating big tech but dont know how internet works

@@insertchannelnamehere8685 Can confirm, went there last month. Literally on the same hallway as the Chambers of the House of Representatives. You just come out of those big double doors and turn right and there that tunnel is.

Well it sort of works like that in roman law countries...

Nubia Anima yeah, here it works that way, how it works there? in your country you don't have multiple books with all the laws?

Stellra52 3

That makes sense

I swear I heard someone laughing at that point.

Onion News influencing voters to ensure their news is always fresh.

You mean despite Biden’s age? Lol

Yo mountain giant

@@matthew8153 It's funny, if Biden wins we'll have the oldest president beginning their first term since... Well, since Trump, the current record holder. If Trump wins he'll set another record, being the oldest president to begin his second term. No matter who wins the president will be record-breakingly old.

Don’t forget “Breaking: US Postal Service shut down six weeks ago”

Nah that is the second most absurd. The first is that the statue would only cost $50000.

to be literally fair i think its insanely unanimous for both parties that the Challenger disaster was a disaster and lives were sadly lost during the incident (RIP to all Astronauts), so I can get why Democrats and Republicans wanted a memorial

@Edward Lim maybe at the time of the video. Now if one side proposes the other will call them facists and refuse to agree or at best use it as a way to pass Patriot Act 2.0, looking at you the Restrict Act.

Both parties do often agree on passing laws that benefit their corporate masters and furthering the surveillance state.

It happens from time to time. Mostly when it's about war: the US House and Senate voted unanimously to launch the Afghanistan/Irak war "on terrorism" and also to send military support to Ukraine. Don't ask them to agree on anything else.

Same, unfortunately it’s all pretty accurate too 😅

Same, the Iowa weather cam part had me cracking up 🤣

Pretty light this year but yeah haha, hi neighbors!

They were cancelled like 12 years ago

13 European Union MPs voted wrong accidentally recently...

Fishman 02 they didn't they're using it as an excuse because they voted for Article 13

Thats a good thing

@@Haseo92 what

no more laws people

This is also true.

The story behind that one is that crystal meth is a lower schedule drug than weed, lmao

Lmao

"New drug to make heart attacks 60% more enjoyable."

"Biden expected to be President by now" lolll

Maybe Mr beast🤣

It's too late. Reality has surpassed satire

The writers for this era of the onion moved on. They started a new thing called Clickhole

Endangered bird is a [[BIG SHOT?!]]

GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY HEAD GET OUT OF MY [BEAUTIFUL HEAD]

@@legendgames128kromer

[HYPERLINK BLOCKED]

i caught that too lmao, love to see it

She did her dirty on that one 💀💀

On the subtitles, it's "...and remember Jane, Islander can work wonders."! ;)

To be fair she's right, the ONN newswoman is an absolute smokeshow, with great eyeliner.

@@Tricia_K I gotta agree with those subtitles, the Islanders fisherman improves any look

Gotta admit, that jab even caught me off guard.

Where’s the entrance to the capitol building? We’ve been stuck in here for 7 months because every time we try to get out another republican senator stands up and reads green eggs and ham

@@B0ssguy xD

@@B0ssguy TED CRUUUUUUZ!

@@B0ssguy, I thought it was green fish blue fish? I must be so crazy at this point that I can’t even...

@@ChaseMcCain81 Yeah, especially considering that book is "One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish". You might be colorblind.

even the weather gag at the end is relevant

Starla Anne Definitely stealing that one.

LunaticThinker Yes, all of us lunatics like that one ;)

+Starla Anne lol no we dont

Up top.

Kek

i didnt get it

+Tamir Oulu I hope you're good at sports

I didn't get it neither...

@@igor-yp1xv she's saying she's ugly without her make up.

Savage

"Okay, fine, we can put the fire out but first I need to blame the other party and second what's in it for me?'

I liked the one congressman saying "I have a question" Reminded me of being in school with my hand in the air going "Teacher! Teacher!"

Minneapolis is apparently on fire, so they can't do that either.

Like a group of elderly people with dementia or Alzheimers. Absolutely silly fact, somewhere in Europe, I forget where, some nursing homes put false bus stops right outside the nursing home for the Alzheimers patients. When they're having an episode and try to leave, many will sit at the bus stop like they would take in their youth, making it easier for the workers to gently bring them back inside. Thought that was an awesome way to handle things and would be cool if we had that here in America.

@@thotslayer9914 Yeah, but a girl can dream, can't she? :)

TheMilitantHorse lol

Why not? It's probably more reliable anyway 😂😂

It's sad the fact they reality isn't so far from sarcasm and parody.

When real news are becomming a joke, parody news have to become akkurate in order to be funny

The Onion > CNN

The founding fathers (boys, actually) didn't have email. What did they do?

@@AaronMcDaidcarrier pigeons? Probably badass like the owls in harry potter, they smash through your window and boom, the email 😂

@Bosingr and I'm sitting here on capitol hill🎵🎶🎵

it’s funny they just think he has money and completely rip him off, no one would do charity with people like that

_My childhood_

Adam Hoffman I am your 2,400th like

I love that song

I had something for this.

This hasn't aged well

@@embs5803 I think you mean it's aged *perfectly*

Biden is so dull, just Obama 2.0... I mean, still better than Trump I guess but cmon, can we get an actual, passionate, motivated leader for once?

@@theyoshi202 luckily, the two right below Biden in the polls are brewing with passion. Hopefully one of them passes him up!

Same people in Congress mostly.

What?

@@matthewjones39Back in 2009 (when this video was made), the idea of humans screaming at people who disagree with them and obsessing over being influencers instead of focusing on important issues such as climate change was satire. Now in 2023, it’s reality!

@@ladyalicent705we up

just letting you know from the Future that it has gotten better and we live in a utopia now

And sometimes (depressingly) even funnier.

Bruh took me a minute to get it was a joke

Yup, one of the short news passing on the bottom of the screen says something along the lines "Biden confeses that he expected to be president already"

Better than SNL for sure

No, you just started paying attention to politics 9 years later, but the jokes have been funny all along.

Holy shit even more now

@@taciprince7400 And even more now that Biden is the president.

That's the trick, there's still legal crap to get through. Media says he is, government doesn't agree yet.

@@chance9512 cope harder

@@joshellsworth355 coping or not they're still technically correct. And if they are at least they don't have to fabricate a Russian disinformation campaign and put the fbi on a wild goose chase to cope.

You just repeated a line from the video and wrote “lmao” in all caps.

@@arandomzoomer4837 rofl

JonatasAdoM I’ve never heard anyone use that phrase in years.

@@arandomzoomer4837 I see it quite often.

JonatasAdoM Okay, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that there is no humor to your comment.

I mean if you are going to have a heart attack you might as well enjoy it while it lasts Wait does that mean that heart attacks are already enjoyable to a certain degree?

@@airplanes_aren.t_real Yeah... You enjoy watching death-chan come for your soul!

@@amitasrivastava493 "death chan" had me dead. Lmfaoooo

​@@airplanes_aren.t_real They are, yes. The fear of actually dying dampens the experience a lot, but the actual feeling itself is... not THAT bad.

You are everywhere

@@walnut9472 EXACTLY lol...

@@AJRacing yeah ,I saw him in every video recommended to me.😂

Just watch C-Span

@@walnut9472 I am seeing you comment on every onion video ,I watch 😆

After they somehow decided all of that, they are in a deadlock from trying to decide how the gavel will be purchased and where they will.allocate the funding for it, which requires a bill which requires a gavel.

Congress can't remember how to hold a meeting, and who's in it

Thats deep

Congress forgets who other members are

Major sticking point; Republicans want to purchase the gavel, while Democrats expect that someone should just give it to them!

Jane deserved it

Jane: -_-

well if jane would flush the goddamn toilet after he monstrous shits everyone in the office wouldnt hate her

@@Madmatt18 I second that!

Fevos Man more like 0-0

Legit we have no snow in Iowa this year

@@tristanprebil8876 wtf

@@stalin9192 eyyyyy Stalin

Seems legit

4 upfpyyo9yqrooriq95iri92esr

HMM

Craaaaazy

This all happened, including the part Biden officially becoming the president, while the senate house was terrorized by protesters

@@OrbitOnceAround ok now this is epic. I mean, do you remember when they made a skit saying they had a time warp satellite to get info from the future? Satire has now become reality.

and now he is :)

Roach DoggJR there’s only one true answer to the ONN

@@weekbacan682 that hardly seems fair. their coverage of non political-non war related news or opinion peices is actually quite fair and true. i mean they are my go-to guys for the weather. and thats about it

I almost watch onion daily

ONN is considered satire until several years later, when it somehow becomes true.

@@lil0of they should put an expiration date of the satirical value of their videos "Funny until 2016" or something like that

That was i about to say. They should ask the secret service where it is or president or supreme court. Wow everyone there completely blackout how to run the government.

@@airplane312 wait.....what’s the presidents address email though.....shoot....

The best part is how it’s literally across the street from them

"DAMN IT"* There! FTFY 😑

@@maazkalim The subtitles are incorrect

Best part!

Hits harder in November

@@helgil6545 Hits harder in December

doesn’t hit so hard in August 2021 😢

@@Thrownblock Yeah the coup here in 2021 really sucks.

@@ig-nat-ius1891 please tell them I didn't mean anything I was just trolling and it might've gotten out of hand

Janet Craft No. The last line is "Looks like there's a lot of snow there. We'll be right back".

I didn't even catch that the first watch.

Yeah

@@MegaBallPowerBall No. That's *2* lines. You started it.

Wasn't expecting that line lmao

I looked for this comment

Dora: Do you see the library?... No?... Darn it!

Basically the plot of National Treasure 2.

congress: donde esta la biblioteca? dora: muy bueno! congress: ahhh yes finally got the gavel we needed!!! (swiper swipes the gavel from congresses hands) congress: awwwwww!

I just noticed that!

Snowlomodor next?

Best part of the video somehow

The Snowlocaust.

Snowlocaust

Would’ve been better if it was Minnesota

The coordinates they listed for the weather cam are for the Iowa City Municipal Airport in Iowa.

1:55 “Study: Marijuana use down among those using crystal meth.” Smdh. Onion’s lower thirds are the best part. The headline is as true today as it was then.

@Hungry Hungry Hippo india is a corrupt shirhole.

If they actually would forget how to pass a law, that would be an improvement.

Why does that suddenly seem relavent.

this isn’t funny anymore :/

@@robk7266 maybe look at the time it was posted?

just like the Congress lol.

It is passed to the left hand side.

More like 32. That's what happens when you plagiarise.

Biden always predicts the future. Guess Biden will be president soon.

@@siyacer I doubt it, but we will see

@@dude3278 we saw

Well this aged really well

The Video is nine years old but still up to date.

@@conorstapleton3183 or maybe america is outdated lmao

Fuck off

s0nnyburnett And again.

Jesus this gets more relevant with each passing year.

lmao i only got to "I'm just a bill Oh I'm only a bill"

Best part

Bruh

Has always been like this

And if they said fuck the gavel, let's just use this random dictionary.

Prison Mike Onion > Fox, let’s not be biased here

@@MIKERJ999 I think he just forgot it, the point is still the same that MSM sucks.

Onion > SNL You can't just... F*** it, you're right.

@@jonasseorum5471 nah kinda just sounds like he specifically mentioned every liberal news channel

@@eyalgreen8285 Nonsense, he just named all the *news* networks.

when have they ever not been eerily prophetic

@Justin B ofcourse it's prophetic, how many vp become presidents? it never a given

@@shankhadeepshome3982 I mean… A LOT of VP’s become presidents

This has once again aged like a fine wine.