LET THEM KNOW! I expect men to have preferences, but I'll never respect a Black man that dislikes & degrades Black women in order to show he favors something else.
PleaseExcuseUs I hope you also look at black women who put down and belittle black men with disdain as well. It goes both ways. They taught us this self hatred which exists in both genders. Despite the fact that majority of black men DO date black women and vice versa, the self hatred still exists. These ladies put some truth out there, I just hope instead of anger and resentment we find ways to uplift eachother instead of fighting back with aggression. That type of shit just drives us further apart.
jjind it was degrading and stereotyping.. i am not a black lady.. and i was offended.... the asinine.. will always think that 1 ..or many. spoiled apples .....ruins the entire barrel... and there are way too MANY.... non pink males.. who believe the madness. welfare.. posted..... it's only until they date.. procreate.. marry a non black female... .. do they realize.. that women .. no matter the color.. can be bitchy.. bossy.... with an attitude.. loud.. and argumentative.. ... when pushed.... angered... tired... .provoked... hormonal... etcetera... if you want to believe statistics.. sweetie.. pink chicks.. are inflicted with domestic violence.. at the same rates. if not higher than everybody else... and what is like the number one.. reason.. why a male.. box his women??.. well one.. of the excuses i heard.. and read... is ..the woman was.... argumentative... so again color.. race.. has nothing to do .. with how a woman wants to behave!!!!..... and then he goes to mention.. that black females are fluffy.. .. when .. the entire.. world.. has stamped on his chest... *i am black.. and I LOVE FAT PINK CHICKS*....?... to me that is pure COMEDY!... anyway.... .. in one point in time....i had the misfortune of... dating an american black male...notice... i use the word male.. and not man... and for the month of being with him guess.. what he did... ?????....each time we walked in the street he will go... look she is rolling her eyes at us... she got an attitude.. she MAD...... etc..... etc... etcetera.... when in the reality ... NOT one black lady.... was giving a piece of shit about us..... he really wanted somebody..... to look at us... throw hate our way... that he imagined the shade was on us ....each time we were in the sun.. not a day went by that he didn't say.. something.... negative about a lady who shared the.... color of his mother!... i think he.. and a lot of black males.. feel that this is something they have to do.. while in the relationships with non black ladies... tear down black women.. to lift the other woman up.... after explaining to this male..... to please to remember ...that i am Cuban.. my esteem is high already enough.....so i don't need anybody .. trying to put others down.. in an attempt to lift me up... i had to kick his ass out ...of my universe with the quickness.... because.. you see me???..i don't need that negative ....bullshit in my life!!!!... and i wonder... if black american males... or blacks no matter the ethnicity... . realize.. that there are... massive amounts of reason.. that their..... counterparts can go use.. as to why they don't want you... but for some reason... they keep giving you people chance.... i guess because they realize.. that one .. or maybe even MANY spoiled apples...doesn't ruin the entire barrel...be blessed
CreamyButta wait.. i made the mistake.. of assuming welfare .. was black... i don't know what he/she is.. ...can't care actually.. because.. my truths... are still valid.... be blessed
jjind but just as he has had bad experiences with black women, doesn't denounce that she or other black women haven't had bad experiences with black men as well. An eye for an eye kind of thing.
This poem fucking disgusted me. Because every word was true. As a Black man, I've heard that "I don't date Black girls" shit from fellow Black men an infuriating number of times, as well as the surprised looks thrown my way when I tell them my preference is for Black girls. So much ignorance among us. They really did well teaching us to hate ourselves, didn't they? It's gotta be soul crushing - as Black people we become privy to the matrix early; we learn to expect that kind of scorn an rejection from others, but from your own? From the ones who are supposed to be YOUR rock, if no one else's? That must really sting. Damn. We gotta do better. "To be woman and Black is to be magic. It is to be the witch that wouldn't burn." So much truth in that line. Sistas, y'all ARE magic. Y'all are more than that, y'all are life itself. And if anybody says different, they're out their mind.
Rawrlor lmao first its 70% of black women are single, now 90% of us are married!?. and of 90%, just how frequently are black folks actually getting married?
Thank you! It is pretty upsetting to see so much degrading of blk wmn from black men. Think of how blk women who don't want to date outside their race must feel hearing this on a regular basis.
Rawrlor LIes, all lies and I would never, ever follow a Black man who is partnered up with and procreating with a non-black woman. The only thing he can do is provide for the cause financially and give his signature if need be. And if he don't want to do that, then screw him.......we don't need or want Black men like that anyways. Just like no man can serve two masters, no man can fully be of service to his community and someone else's.
Still powerful. "To be women and black is to be the first and last person to love yourself" "I grew up learning how to protect men who hate me" so sad but true 😢😢😢
@@s0lth885 It is deeper than preference. Preference would be just going about your life and dating who you want...it goes beyond preference when you treat others like they are less than, and you do not value them as human beings in the way you would value others.
I'm a black male and I completely agree with them. It's OK to like other races but to dislike and degrade your own kind is unacceptable. Personally, I like black women the most and I honestly couldn't imagine myself dating/marrying someone who isn't black
"I grew up learning how to protect men who hate me." "To be Black and a Womyn is to be resilient. My very existence is Defiance" Such a powerful Poem, it gave me chills! "College students Crystal Valentine and Aaliyah Jihad teamed up to recite the poem, and Button Poetry posted a video of their performance to RU-vid on Sunday, July 19. "Puerto Rican, Italian, Bajan, Thai -- I know they want me to be everything I'm not," the poets powerfully recite together at one point during the performance explaining the misogyny, colorism, and constant pressure to be more "exotic" looking that black women face. The poem perfectly encapsulates the reality of being a black woman, highlighting how ironic it is that while black men make black women feel undesirable, black women are also on the front lines of civil rights issues that affect black men -- and rarely getting any credit for it." #BlackWomynlivesmatter
Shawna Sherice I took it to mean as the mothers of some of these "exotic" women are Black but these type of Black men don't see this connection and how asinine their logic is, when putting down Black women. Like when that rapper said he doesn't like dark skinned women because of their black butts. He thought he was giving a compliment to lighter skinned women but forgot to consider their dark skinned mothers, aunties, and sisters with his color struck comments.
T. L. I thought so initially however, from my experience I received worse treatment and it tore me down to concerning levels. Not only was I an African American female of Caribbean descent, I was considered to be Haitian, African or Jamaican - not that I have anything against any of these places I found the very beings that I loved did not love me back because of my 'blackness' and it hurt! This presentation hit a soft spot. And I still believe its Beijing, lol!
Being a dark skinned teenage girl nowadays, I receive a lot of shit. My friends always tell me how flawless and unique my skin is, like it's their job, like I'm insecure about the way I was made. I don't need anyone to tell me, especially some close minded boy, that I'm beautiful. Because I know.
Not really, I'm sure she finds it flattering but after the 100th time it simply becomes patronizing. Clearly, you a black women didn't care much about what she said because after reading her comment, you followed up with a statement about her looks rather to discuss what she said. She doesn't need to hear that her melanin slays right now, just to be heard. The irony here is amazing, it really is.
I had to stop and process this because it moved me to tears. There are no words. My heart absolutely breaks for all these beautiful black women who go through this every damn day. History is full of ugliness that many of us are aware of but keep hidden. This piece....wow. Just wow.
Tony Williams Yeah, are you saying that BW don't "own" BM when your Black asses are being shot by the police? Are your White, Asian, and Latina women going to be there for you? Tony, you mistakenly think that we care who and what you date, but the truth of the matter is that no matter how much you "date out," you and your ilk are still bitter. Date whom you want, Tony. There's no love lost. Black males like you add nothing to the diaspora; in fact, you are the weakest link, those other women you date are much more deserving of us than Black women. Live well and prosper, "brutha."
Tony Williams you hate to see us in pain, but your first comment is basically fuck Black women, you'll continue to date everyone but us. No, you love and get off seeing Black women in pain and try to wound us any chance you get. Just be honest with yourself if not us.
They don't need knowledge they are better looking than most women our society idolizes. Watching an excess of porn featuring blonde people doesn't mean everyone else in society will go along with your porn preferences based on objectification.
This was a necessary piece to be delivered. I feel that as black women we often feel that we have to prove our worth, our value, our intelligence, our capabilities, and our most positive qualities because we're attacked, mocked and dehumanized so much. We're especially attacked in the media and entertainment. The point is that we have immeasurable value, incredible worth, unmatched beauty and much more to offer the world than anyone could imagine. We are dynamic, we are precious. We are strong, we are resilient. We are intelligent, we are trend setters. We are creative, we are brave. We are loving, we are nurturing. We are and since it seems like too much to ask that the world recognize our worth, it'd be great if the men who look closest to us could. Til then, my fellow black sisters, shine anyway.
I've seen and watched a lot of poems written by and for Black women but this is the very first one that really made me tear up. This just felt so real. I have a Black male friend who is very open and vocal about not liking Black women. I am Asian and he told me he prefer Asians than Black, but White is at the top of his preference list. He also mentioned that he could maybe date a mixed girl. What these two women said on their poem is pretty much the same things my guy friend told me, in one way or another. Now I am thinking about linking this video to him to make him realize some things. I don't want to change him because it is his personal preference afterall, but the things I couldn't say to him in fear of creating a misunderstanding, i hope he finds in this poem.
hght Exactly, but my thought is it won't sink in. Men like TheChinky88's friend are just as in the dark about their mindset as racists are about theirs.
TheChinky88 I encourage you to send the link and have an open conversation with him about why you feel his attitude, not his "preference," is harmful and problematic. Because ultimately, having a "preference" should not lead you to hate another group of women.
TheChinky88 Honey, the only thing you can do is stay away from this guy and warn other non-black women. If you need more examples of self hating Black males disregarding Asian women, look no further than Tiki Barber - who left his Asian wife, for a 20 something year old blond haired, blue eyes, pale skinned white woman, when she was 8 months pregnant.
Before Button Poetry came along, I had never heard the written word spoken In such a way. I had never heard emotion such as what I hear in this poetry and the poetry I have listened too before this one. It is so 'real' so 'raw' and so.... dragged out of the depths of a hurt soul...............I cry......each time.......I cry....
It was very brave for these two women to go and openly speak about the way black men have been treating & disrespecting black women. Not only online but in the real world. It is ridiculous how many black men truly hate black women & spend hours on RU-vid slandering them & bullying women they don't even know.
OMG I loved this. It gave me chills. I shared it on every medium I could. To be, not just black, but a dark skinned black woman. I understood every bit of this poem. Protecting men that hate you. Wanting to be lighter. Believing you're simply ugly because of your skin. Because of things you cannot control. Omg yes. I watched this back to back. I love this. And I thank the two young women for putting it in such beautiful bold words.
This is my dad. always putting white women, especially Scandinavian women, on some fucking pedistal despite having 3 black daughters and a black wife (although they are now divorced). He's always insulting black women around me. telling me how they look like 'drag queens' and always talking about that 'single black mum' stereotype. I swear as the days go by, I just lose respect for him. Absolutley disgusting.
Wow Your own father behaves this way? He is inflicting his hatred and internalised racism onto you. Girl you stay strong and be proud of who you. Don't let his twisted thoughts capture you too
I think as black women we just have to do our thing and be happy and love ourselves. I've been doing a lot of color therapy and wearing pink a lot and I notice I have been getting a lot of attention from men of other races.
It's funny because by having displayed this misogynistic ignorance for everyone to see, at the expense of their female counterparts, Black men have only embarrassed and disgraced themselves, tbqh. Asian, White, Mestizo-Latin women wouldn't have to recite poems like this because their men do not ridicule them for the world to see. Whatever may be going on in their homes in private, non black men are smart enough to know how to 'front', in terms of how they want the world to see them and their race/women. Not only that but they're too busy making moves and money to be using their women as a scapegoat for why they ain't shit and why they are weak. In the UK - and I'm pretty sure it is the same in the States, Turkish, Asian and even Caucasian men from Eastern Euro countries have an array of businesses that cater to their own (and even their own banks). In the States, it is Black women who are succeeding academically and snatching up business after business...while their male counterparts are too busy complaining about hair weave and why the black woman is 'holding him back'. Black American women, I commend you. Keep making your moves and doing great. The world, deep down, knows how innovative and amazing you guys are.
I freaking love crystal valentine, her voice makes me cry, and this poem was so strong and moving that I had to take a minute to relax from being so hyped over this beauty
I agree with this poem very much and I.might add that when a black woman dates outside the race black men dont like it but these are the same black man who dont like black women so to me it seems as if black man just doesn't want black women to be happy.
This is too real. I've struggled with self-esteem all my life and I thought things would get better as I got older. However, as I have begun to fully realize just how much ignorance and hatred gets directed at Black women in a Eurocentric society, I'm just starting to feel worse and worse about myself. I am working on ignoring negativity that I encounter so I can begin to fully love myself, but it's so hard sometimes. Beautiful performance!!
I've been bingeing these videos. They need to be heard and listened to, and they are important. These people are beautiful important, and they have the world in their hearts.
Story of my life. I love me a dark chocolatey man. They, in general, dont like me. The ones that do, most of the time (in my personal experiences) they are already taken. I am not a mistress so there is a conflict of interest. I've heard it all. You're Pretty, For a Black Girl You're Nice, For a Black Girl You're Funny, For a Black Girl You're Sweet, For a Black Girl You're Cool, For a Black Girl You're Fun to hang out with, FOR A BLACK GIRL. If those describe who I am, why is that not good enough? I tell myself its because I'm boring though. Makes me feel better.
ayamejoy Who says they don't love black women just because they may not be interested in a particular one? You'll find many black women who have rejected black men, does it mean black women don't love black men?
This is why black women need to support other black women because if we do not black men will piss on us.(not all) but I will never understand the dislike and disrespect black men show black women, why??? It is us who love and care for you. Too sad!!!
This poem describes my own brother's viewpoint on dating black women. my mom told him to write what he hated about black women and send it to every woman in our family. he never did it...
+*kyla* strawberry right. Quick question? Do you have a problem with BW. Or do you just lack empathy for us!? I've noticed you've commented a lot on others as though you just show no remorse at all. No feelings.. No understanding. Are you ok? How are you?
These Sistas are speaking TRUTH. I just hope that the ones who really need to hear this, not only hear it, but process it, and build the corrective action needed to change what these Sistas are speaking on. I'm helping to spread the word about this and yes, I'm a Brother who is married to a Nubian Queen and loves, admires, and is truly in awe of the awesome BETTER HALF: The Black Woman.
"..i grew up learning how to protect men who hate me" "..is to be the witch that wouldn't burn." Every line cast a spell on my skin and now I'm waiting my goosebumps to calm down.
i've lost count on how many times i've watched this today since coming across it on Tumblr... so powerful... the very same way people preach that black love is not white hate but white supremecy is definitely about black hate; they forget to notice that a black woman's understanding of the black man's preference to date outside his race is fine, but he does it at the expense of downgrading black women; looking for everything she's not... black women date outside our race usually due to attraction, and love and the limited selection we have of black men that actually appreciate us; but ask a black man why he dates other races- the answers are mostly always about a black woman's "attitude" or wanting "pretty" babies... smh
Benjamin X seeing as you felt the need to respond to my comment, you should know i can respond back in any way I choose to; it is a public forum. My "blanket statements" come from ACTUAL conversations and comments that i've heard time and time again.... if you disagree with my statement, that's fine; as human beings, we can all agree to disagree; if i "annoy you" with my response, maybe you shouldn't open yourself to such responses
Natasha Angelique 1.) where in my comment did i say i would get annoyed :/ 2) I know it's a public forum, tht's why i came to you with respect instead of shaming your comment
Benjamin X i dnt make a note of posting anything without having some facts behind it. And the fact that I and many have experienced, and what i've heard come from the very mouths of most men is that yes, the preference of dating outside your race is fine if that's who you're attracted to and find love with; but there's never the need to downplay, disrespect or outcast those you aren't attracted to or let that be the reason why you feel the need to date elsewhere
Natasha Angelique Very well..I agree with you on that....BUT not every black men who has a preference of a woman who is non-black downgrades black men....Although you said it was based on your personal experience......Reading your initial comment would make others think otherwise
This poem is amazing and brings up so many good points and topics. I hope they continue to do such amazing things with their words, I love this so much!
Cried because I had people either tell me this or just say it conversation without regard for what it was saying about me. Or how it would make me feel. My black is beautiful but sometimes it is really hard to see it when the world disregards it so much. Black men have it hard but often times I feel like the struggle of the black women is invisible to the rest of the world.
this is profoundly beautiful & saddening simultaneously. this society is so uncivilized. these are the messages that need to be heard so that mayhaps cats will wake up & live better...
I love poetry . But this poem is so beautifully knitted. , so beautifully knitted. It surpasses every single poem I've ever heard, possibly because it's my truth. Thank you
