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Rule # 1: Run Rule # 2: Run far Rule # 3: Run far far Rule # 4: Run far far far Rule # 5: Run far far far far Rule # 6: Run far far far far far Rule # 7: Just run!
U got dui iud go date that ratchet ova there n stay da fk away from me !!!!!! Thank god for hypergamy !!!!!! Stay away from the dusties n psycho paths 😱😱😱😱😱
Went through this shit... Gurl if he's emotionally unavailable, you better run for your life. The boy almost killed me giving me all kinds of heart palpitations and sleepless nights😓😢😅
1. Don't try to do/fix everything for him. 2. Don't try to be everything to him. 3. Observe his commitment to change. 4. If you're not his girlfriend, don't pretend to be. 5. Recognize the "I've been hurt before " b.s. 6. Don't settle for friends with benefits. 7. Avoid the scarcity mindset.
@@Unapologeticallyme89 Girl...If the choice is between you and me, I'm choosing myself every time. Leaving these emotionally unavailable dudes in my dust 🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️.
😘 Another good one Son,. My friend, and I were listening to your very encouraging, and motivating video about about how if you're not satisfied with your weight,, then do something about it, and we are. We are walking an hour and a half each morning and then off to water aerobics, for 45 minutes. Not only does my son help you guys, I want you to know that he is also my own inspiration 🤗. I am so very proud of him, and I would like, to thank all of you , for your overwhelming and awesome, support and the love yu have shown Kevin. Kevin is the best gift that God has ever give me.
Focus on other things in life..Dont waste your time obsessing over an unavailable man....You will realize in the end that you just wasted your time, energy, tears and emotion over this man...
I've loved a damaged man for too damn long. He didn't have the emotional ability to love me back. He broke me into tiny peices and still begs me til this day to give him another chance. I ain't got nothing left to give this man, he took everything and drained me. Now it's all about me and learning to love myself again and fix myself! I'll never date a damaged man again.. I learnt the hard way they turn around and break you!
Most of these trauma’s are passed down from generations, etc how to be a man, men in this society in my opinion, are way better than the men from previous generations
I just wanna say I'm proud of you ladies on here. It starts with the woman. If a woman don't change how she deal with the men. These guys continue their madness. Stay strong. U have too.
Rule 1. Don't go out with him Rule 2. Don't go out with him Rule 3. Gurl don't go out with him Rule 4. Delete his number Rule 5. Date someone else, just not him Rule 6. Drop him and move on Rule 7. Didn't y'all hear me, DON'T GO OUT WITH HIM! You're welcome 😂
I used to hate dating but now that I’m dating again with guidelines and a purpose. I love it! My main rule is just to not take anything personal and to stick to my guns and know what I want. A guy tried to pull that I been hurt before bs with me recently. And I told him we ALL been hurt like u need to just focus on making yourself whole again bc I’m not going to be smashing dude and wasting my time. And u know what he told me... It’s not wasting time if we both enjoy it. Like I really thought I was dumb AF and falling for the okie doke. I ghosted him and left him where I found him lol
Date with guidelines and a purpose, I think you could write a guideline for all women and sell it, girl! I do believe that we need to be moving with purpose as well, and just keeping things casual with men initially and not planning our weddings so soon, when it's usually not that serious.
Yes, there are plenty of good men. That doesn't mean they're good for me specifically. Just being a good man doesn't automatically make him a viable partner. So it's a little more complicated than just saying, "there are plenty of good men". Although staying in a miserable situation with a man who also isn't qualified is not the solution, definitely better to be single and reconnect with yourself. ❤
You spoke nothing but FACTS! Its like I'm a magnet for emotionally unavailable men. God keeps allowing them to come in to see if I've learned my lesson or not lol. From taking psychology, personal experience, and research I know its all stemmed from my childhood. Abandonment issues from my dad not being fully active in my life. I'm in the process of retraining myself out of that. It's toxic and draining asf. And then when the men who are emotionally available shoot their shot, I would feel that they were "lame" or "corny".. BUT now I've been really attracted to those types of men. I have to force myself to be believe I am worthy of that type of love & attention and that there are good men out there. Don't judge me, I'm learning!
"His Astylist" 🤣. Man I remember being the fixer. Maaaaan. I did all that you listed NOT to do. The pain I felt in that situationship, I told myself NEVER again will I do that!
What I have learned from my experience in relationships with damaged people (both genders) is that - Givers need to have limits, because takers never do. Damaged people are takers -emotionally, energetically, physically. You don't help them by all your giving, instead you end up drained and exhausted - and they wont care! Nor will they be any less damaged by your giving.
The truth no matter how positive you are & communicate effectively, they will still bring up negativity & expect you to share love to them they ain’t giving you
Well said. It’s our choice to be in a healthy relationship. We deserve a man that is willing to be a parter. True love should never be miserable. If a man is unemotionally unavailable, move on. You ARE NOT going to change him.
I JUST walked away from something like this. Super draining and i deserve someone who is ready. I do not have to be the one to fix anyone or be the one to make him feel whole when that’s his job to do.
This video is on point!! But same goes for us too! don’t mislead someone just because you don’t want to be alone, in revenge to someone else or you need financial support. People nowadays are so much in need of emotional support or financial support that have them stay I’m toxic relationships.. being emotionally and financially independent is a skill we all most need to learn.
Yes sis, this guy I met on bumble 🙄ikr.. we talked met for lunch He knows i'm buying a home and i'm very financially set. His house burnt down long story short I asked if he was going to get a new home and he said yes i will. Then his talking About me and him being together like relationship. Well then he starts telling me what house i should get. Oh hell no.... he said u should move near me get a home with land and a workshop I could work on my cars there. I quickly said well what's the news on ur home u found anything? No not yet no sir no sir.. then another day I met his son who is 17 and his son asked about what kind of house i'm trying to get. 🤷🏽♀️ r u asking that? So his dad quickly responded hopefully my us. I said well have u been looking for a home for u? I'm not sure when i'm moving. He said no I haven't I think i'm going to live with my mom a lil longer. I hope he don't think i'm moving him in hello no.. that's mine only I need to meet me half way with at least having your own stuff
@@senoraespinosa6176 You would have needed to ask more questions if you were still interested. He was treating you like the golden ticket. Why he told his sone about you is definitely questionable. That is why I am staying single cause it is all a game for some
Thanks for this video, I'm in a relatable situation where the man I have been seeing for 3 months has not been giving me his all. He's been inconsistent with plans and only sees me when it's convenient for him. We have great chemistry and dynamics, however he has unresolved strings from his past keeping us from advancing. I took a month apart from him to rethink our "relationship" and I come to the realization that it will never go anywhere and he's comfortable with how things are. I don't have the time to nurture and build a man. He needs to want to work on his unresolved issues before being with anyone.
This was by far the best video ever. Keep it real Kev that's what I like about you. If he can't define the relationship he's just using you until something better comes along.
RIGHT! IS👏HE👏WORTH👏IT? Getting involved with an emotionally unavailable man will lead to distress, so he needs to show some kind of effort on his part. Don't just get involved with him because you want to change him, get involved because you can see he wants to change himself. GREAT TIPS, THANKS FOR SHARING!
*Dealing with emotionally unavailable men can be tough, but understanding how to navigate these situations is empowering. Let's value ourselves and seek relationships where our emotional needs are met.*
Dude.. thank you. I was definitely in a mommy-son type relationship, trying to fix this guy and he has soooo much to work on. Things that no one can help but himself. I wish him the best, and it's nice closure knowing I can forgive from a distance.
Sounds like my last relationship. It started to feel like a parent-child relationship. He didn’t have his mommy growing up and it became very obvious. He’s 42 and emotionally unavailable.
When I tell you I keep this on loop... you'll be out of breath after the 2nd one. So thank you. You've been helping me for about 3 years. Yet, I needed more than ever. (:
I met an incredibly sweet man, but within 3 days of getting to know him he revealed to me how messed up he was because of his ex. I immediately told him that he was not ready for me so I am going to leave you alone now. And, that is exactly how I left it. I don't have the time nor the want to baby a grown ass man who is fucking stupid for even allowing a terrible woman to have an opportunity to destroy him.
BRAVO!! I started seeing an emotionally unavailable guy last year, and he actually did like me and cared about my feelings because he saw me as high value. Wanna know how I could tell? Cuz he said “I’m not over my ex cheating on me. Let’s not do anything physical and stay just friends until I’ve healed so I can give my all in a proper relationship with you later down the line.” I decided not to wait for him (hello, abundance mindset), but that was a great learning experience!
🔥Good information Kev!👏🏾👏🏾..plus you keeps it REAL!!! 🤭😄😖 Thank you!🙏🏾 KEV, I seem to attract the mental cases, men suffering from "jive turkey syndrome" and the lazy impaired. 😖😄🤭 Help! Please! Please do a video soon on these kinds of whackos my smart intellectual brother!
All of what you are saying is true. I just got out of a situation with all of this. I noticed it before I knew how to label it. I 1st heard it from MJ Harris. But you give from both sides of coin. Thanks so much for making me feel better about myself and not feeling sorry for him.
I'm facing the first year anniversary of losing my mother. And yet my husband is arguing with me. He's never emotionally available I'm seeing. I've decided to become emotionally unavailable as well.
OH this is the most genuine and straight forward video just right for my situation. Much appreciated Kev that you started with pointing out women are oftenly overly giving and trust he will change. It hit directly to my heart, and which is the essential problem of mine under the current situation.
Totally correct Kev sad coming from disfuntional family's we have never been taught many waste there lives for search for love that is never being returned
Dude doesn't even know me yet he just described me to a T! I'm embarrassed of how gullible I've been over the years.. i just wanna be happy. I give my all and barely get any effort in return
I recommend the song "Walk On Boy" by Doc Watson. Yeah it's a blues song but it really captures the idea that you must be responsible for your own baggage before you can care for someone else or someone else's baggage, and that the same is expected of them as well.
So correct... some of the best advice I ever got when I was "involved" with a f*king trainwreck of a damaged man was: DON'T HELP HIM. This sets up the mommy dynamic thus increasing him feeling like a helpless child. He WILL resent you for being a woman who is more capable than him and he WILL feel emasculated by the dynamic and WILL lose his sexual attraction for you because he will feel like less of a man. And... yeah thankfully I left his sorry ass a couple years ago and he's still out there couch surfing & mooching off his own mother's money & single. I can say I learned a lesson from that. Maybe you could do a video on momma's boys? Because ... while I'm sure there may be some momma's boys that are reasonable with women, in my experience... they can be some coddled, entitled little man-boy brats who you can never be good enough for because you are not his momma. Love your messages dude.
Ain't having it. Not love starved or a sucker for love desperate or afraid of being alone or like the counselor said not to be a liability. Right so. add on to each other don't want to do girlfriend work if don't want the real relationship ain't trying to be in your space if there is no plans for me to be in your whole future plans , no sex rather be in Love
When you meet a gentleman, he doesn't always show his faults or short comings. When you fall in love, those behaviors start showing. I fell deeply in love with a wonderful man. I saw his inner beauty, unaware of the cloak of anger and darkness with which that beauty was wrapped in. My soul yearns for the man i fell in love with. It's not weakness, society needs to engage family and emotional development in the classroom so we can evolve into more loving beings. Walking away was the hardest thing I had to do. 😪
"Broken Bird Syndrome"!!! Wow, I have never heard of that before. I think I have Level One of that😫😂 but it usually doesn't take me that long to come to my senses. Just in general, I need to pay more attention to the red flags when it comes to dating. I hate dating...grrrr😫😂
Dear kev and lovely public ... I listen again and again to this wonderful coaching... im a Nurse ...and it seems I also have broken bird syndrome.... i’ve been growing a lot though.... and just able to break free.... Listening to this video helps me a lot... thank you so much
It’s interesting how the title has the word dating in it. I never even got a chance to date any asshole I’ve associated myself with. Lol I’ve only dealt with men who are 1000% unavailable …
Watching this again. Best advice I've heard , and although I feel most of us know it in our hearts, sometimes we all need the motivation to hear it and get out. Agree with everyone here who says - you don't handle them, you leave them . Thanks for making this video. Love it :)
thank you for this. My fear is that i wont find anyone else,,it took this long to find him. He's been in so many bad relationships with woman that just use him and now that we've met hes shut his heart out.. everything in my life just has bad timing. But I do recognize that i deserve better and that i rather cry from being alone vs being hurt by someone who just wants to date. I know need to cope with the fact that i really care about this man but that i also need to leave because i deserve better and that it will come sooner rather than later
Sometimes when you leave people where they are at, you allow them to grieve purposely in their pain and memory of damaging relationships. Pray for them. Focus on fixing a hearty plate of self worth. 🦋🗝💫
Well said I was once one of them women the broken bird healer. Never saw like that. I just though if you love on them they would love you back. WRONG I wasted my life on broken people and truth I was broken and I guess I didn't want people to hurt like me. But I found my healing and I love myself and growing everyday. It will never happen to me again. I am a good woman I know my worth and, not looking for a relationship because I'm at peace with myself. It really feels good I know it wasn't me. It's just sad I wasted valuable time on people.
You can't be no more or less than 30yrs old!! And YOU, YOU , telling a 60yr old to straighten up and Fly Right!!!! Damn, you're alrighty then!! Bless you dear!! And I'm just seeing this from a yr ago!!! Where the hell were you then??!!! Could've SAVED me a whole LOT of BS!!! Well, better late than Never!!! Keep helping the YOUNG Ladies baby.........
